[DRAFT]Imposter Inquisitor

[Galiantus III]

I came up with this after hearing about this news story that feels like it belongs in NS. And yes, the references to Among Us are intentional.

This is the first time I've ever tried writing an issue, so any feedback is appreciated.

Validity: None of ["State press", "No Computers", "No Internet", "No Video Games"]

Description: After a seemingly routine press conference mainly focused on weather forecasting, the power grid, and vending machine regulations, it was discovered that several questions were not submitted by members of the press. As it turns out, they were submitted by an anonymous thirteen-year-old gamer who used a fake Twitcher account to pose as an online journalist. As you sit down for lunch in the capitol cafeteria, your press secretary calls an informal meeting.

Option 1. "How absurd!" complains your press secretary, venting her frustrations to everyone. "Who knows what damage could be done by these internet trolls messing with our system? We must thoroughly screen anyone claiming to be a journalist, and all questions should be approved beforehand!"

Result: script writers never speak ill of @@LEADER@@

Option 2. "Well, don't punish me!" says Baron Williamson, a popular news reporter, as he attempts to pay for his food with a credit card. "This is obviously the fault of social media. All social media sites should use state ID systems to verify the identity of their users, so no one can use fake accounts to hide behind a shroud of anonymity." As the card reader rejects his card for the fifth time, he pays in cash.

Result: teenagers monitor their parents' screen time

Option 3. "Are you guys for real?" ' shouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, leader of the @@DEMONYM Opposition Party, from across the room. "This kid asked several crucial questions that exposed important flaws in your most recent policies. The real imposters are the biased media that live in your back pocket! You should let anyone ask whatever questions they like of our government. You don't have a problem with transparency, do you? Huh? DO YOU?!" Having run out of oxygen, @@HE@@ faints, and is dragged out by an aid.

Validity: No dictatorships, no single-party rule.

Result: ministers request vacation time to use the restroom

Option 4. One of your aids looks up from her phone. "Why do we have press conferences anyway? They're boring, cause problems, and the media can clearly watch us do all our tasks. Save everyone time and sanity, and stop holding press conferences."

Result: @@LEADER@@ is sus

Validity: None of ["State press", "No Computers", "No Internet", "No Video Games"]

Description: After a seemingly routine press conference mainly focused on weather forecasting, the power grid, and vending machine regulations, it was discovered that several questions were not submitted by members of the press. As it turns out, they were submitted an anonymous thirteen-year-old gamer who used a fake Twitcher account to pose as an online journalist. As you sit down for lunch in the capitol cafeteria, your press secretary calls an informal meeting.

Option 1. "How absurd!" says your press secretary, venting her frustrations to everyone "Who knows what damage could be done by these internet trolls messing with our system? We must thoroughly screen anyone claiming to be a journalist, and all questions should be approved beforehand!"

Result: script writers never speak ill of @@LEADER@@

Option 2. "Well don't punish me!" says Baron Williamson, a popular news reporter, as he attempts to pay for his food with a credit card "This is obviously the fault of social media. All social media sites should use state ID systems to verify the identity of their users, so no one can use fake accounts to hide behind a shroud of anonymity." As the card reader rejects his card for the fifth time, he pays in cash.

Result: teenagers monitor their parents' screen time

Option 3. "Are you guys for real?" shouts a voice from the other side of the cafeteria. You see it's the leader of the opposition party. His tirade continues, spittle flying everywhere. "This kid asked several crucial questions that exposed important flaws in your most recent policies. The real imposters are the biased media that live in your back pocket! You should let anyone ask whatever questions they like of your government. You don't have a problem with transparency, do you? Huh? DO YOU?!" Having consumed all his oxygen with anger, he faints, and is dragged out by an aid.

Result: ministers request vacation time to use the restroom

Option 4. One of your aids looks up from her phone. "Why do we have press conferences anyway? They're boring, cause problems, and the media can clearly watch us do all our tasks. Save everyone time and sanity, and stop holding press conferences."

Result: @@LEADER@@ is sus

[Lumio Magika]

A few minor nitpicks, mostly minor grammatical errors. "Submitted by an anonymous..."

It might be more potent if you used "screams" instead of "says" in option one. Adding a period after "everyone" in the same option would be proper grammar.
Add a comma after "Well" in option two.
Add a period after "credit card."

" You see that it's the leader of the opposition party" is not optimal. I would advise a rewrite of the entire first line. As an example, " 'Are you guys for real? ' shouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, leader of the @@DEMONYM Opposition Party, from across the room."
Note that because you want him to be the leader of the Opposition party, this option is invalid for dictatorships, since dictatorships don't have an opposition party. The same thing applies to nations that don't allow multiple parties or have low political freedoms.

"your government" should be "our government."

My final comment is that none of your "results" are relevant to the issue. From my viewpoint, they're all completely random.

[Galiantus III]

@Lumio

Thanks for the feedback! I've adopted most of your suggestions.

I can see how the results might require some explanation. Let me explain my reasoning:

1. "script writers never speak ill of leader" because they are often hired by the media and/or the government to pre-write whole press conferences to acceptable specifications.

2. "teenagers monitor their parents' screen time". The implication here is that teenagers are less likely to have the ID to access social media, so they don't use it as much as their parents. And the reversal of stereotypical roles is just funny.

3. "ministers request vacation time to use the restroom". This is because of the policy that the government answer any question posed to it. Anything which happens outside the public eye - including using the restroom - will naturally become the subject of questions asked by the public. One way to avoid this embarrassing scrutiny would be for members of the government to legally separate their visit to the bathroom from their time in the government. Hence some of them would count it as vacation time.

4. "leader is sus". And naturally so, because the government no longer answers media questions. This also keeps the "Among Us" gag going.

In my experience, results are often vague or highlight only the most absurd possible outcomes of a particular option. This is what I was going for with 1-3. But if these seem too disconnected from the issue I could rewrite them.

[Tsaivao]

@Lumio

Thanks for the feedback! I've adopted most of your suggestions.

I can see how the results might require some explanation. Let me explain my reasoning:

1. "script writers never speak ill of leader" because they are often hired by the media and/or the government to pre-write whole press conferences to acceptable specifications.

2. "teenagers monitor their parents' screen time". The implication here is that teenagers are less likely to have the ID to access social media, so they don't use it as much as their parents. And the reversal of stereotypical roles is just funny.

3. "ministers request vacation time to use the restroom". This is because of the policy that the government answer any question posed to it. Anything which happens outside the public eye - including using the restroom - will naturally become the subject of questions asked by the public. One way to avoid this embarrassing scrutiny would be for members of the government to legally separate their visit to the bathroom from their time in the government. Hence some of them would count it as vacation time.

4. "leader is sus". And naturally so, because the government no longer answers media questions. This also keeps the "Among Us" gag going.

In my experience, results are often vague or highlight only the most absurd possible outcomes of a particular option. This is what I was going for with 1-3. But if these seem too disconnected from the issue I could rewrite them.

That's sort of the problem, though. If your results require explanation to understand the joke, then they're not good results. In practice they'll be absent of any sort of explanatory context (minus, of course, option 4, which is blatantly on the nose in my opinion, and doesn't match the really nice subtlety of the rest of the issue).

To me it feels like there's a lot of far-reaching logic in your results that makes it hard to understand what the joke is.

As for the rest of the issue, I do like it, but I feel like it's kind of treading ground already covered in other issues

[Galiantus III]

That's sort of the problem, though. If your results require explanation to understand the joke, then they're not good results. In practice they'll be absent of any sort of explanatory context (minus, of course, option 4, which is blatantly on the nose in my opinion, and doesn't match the really nice subtlety of the rest of the issue).

To me it feels like there's a lot of far-reaching logic in your results that makes it hard to understand what the joke is.

That makes sense. I'll rewrite the results.

As for the rest of the issue, I do like it, but I feel like it's kind of treading ground already covered in other issues

In what way?

I looked at every instance of the word "press" and "conference" used in all the issues. While it is true many issues use press conferences as a setting, I have not seen an issue that directly tackles the government holding press conferences and what can go on there. And from the perspective of press freedom, and government information in general, this appears to be a new angle.

[Deblar]

*insert the “stop posting about among us” rant here*

[Daarwyrth]

I feel the premise in this issue would be a little bit stronger if the questions actually embarrassed @@LEADER@@ in a way, or at least caused a little bit more of an uproar. The current premise sounds a little bit tame, in the sense that I don't really feel a sort of urgency. Because if the girl is simply asking questions, isn't that technically the right of any citizen in a democratic society? Regardless of their age?

My suggestion would be to try to find an angle on the premise wherein the urgency of the matter becomes clear, and the girl's questions are evidently malicious/trolling. Because in its current form it doesn't really feel like an issue about trolling, but more whether a young girl should be allowed to ask questions. True, she did pose as a journalist, but if she didn't do anything malicious, then the problem at hand feels a little small to me.

[Victorious Decepticons]

I like Option 4. Megatron being sus would be beautifully fitting, and I'd make sure to answer in the way that makes it show up. For the Leader of the Decepticons, that's just another thing that proves that he is the right guy for the position.

[Australian rePublic]

Why would the news conferences be held over the internet?

[Palos Heights]

One of the options should lead with, "I don't know @@LEADER@@, that Baron guy is pretty sus if you ask me."

Also, option four, the fallout there should be something along the lines of either creating @@NATION@@-SPAN or something like "@@LEADER@@s daily briefings routinely break viewership records on streaming platforms". Because you're basically advocating for something like C-SPAN or livestreaming government business on twitch.