The Black Hawks | Still Winning

[Zizou]

STDs through the computer screen with how often you hop between different groups of people.

... I.... okay, what? I'm not even mad, I'm just genuinely confused

I do know I am sigging this though lol

[Varanius]

I may be a newbie to r/d

Well, you’ve certainly proven that to be true!

[Aquilanion]

The Black Hawks and the gang from EPSA, Lily, Aurrelius and Thaecia were enjoying their day when they heard some very confusing news.

Apparently, a group of internet netizens had engaged in some highly risky and speculative investments which is in the process of costing hedge funds millions of dollars, and generally sticking it to the financial establishment.


TBH embassies are a hot commodity rn, only going up!

Anyway, fancying themselves quite the savvy investors, the crew consulted their copies of the Barefoot Investor, read every book written by Warren Buffet, watched the Big Short, read the Wolf of Wall Street, watched the Big Short again, and finally they were ready to take on the forces of finance capital.

Armed with nothing but determination, disproportionate skills at clicking buttons in a web game, and the solidarity of those never likely to own a home, our intrepid investors set out to short stocks, initiate hostile takeovers, pumped and dumped dogecoin, and purchased shares based on their true market value with absolutely no behaviour from big capital influencing the free market.

Well not that last one, we live in the real world after all.

What we did instead was make sure every single one of our investment team remained on the ball, by taking regular hydration breaks, and making sure our hands were warm. The Atlae Isles certainly did not disappoint on the latter, with this pair of rather impressive updating gloves!



The best part? After all the fun we had, we managed to make a quick buck or two! Wanna come make the big bucks? Come Join Us!

Hawks
MAJ Aquilanion, Trigger
SGT Miravana
PFC Got-ya-good
EPSA
Hetman The Atlae Isles
Hussar Philville2
Lily
Lily High Command Frenchy II
Aurrelius
Legionnaire Pinkwashing
Thaecia
Officer Andusre

Hits
Silverhold
Warzone World
The Empire Of Sometinland
Imperial Sparta
Auphia
Congratulations
Gamer
Nya Vanaheim
United Fascist Alliance
Dislocated Eye
Lossium Union
Nani
Mass
Britbongland
Age Of Neutrality
The Trajaanian Archipelago
Land Of Doge
Geap
Mcdonalds Burger Dipped In Toilet Water3
Juicy Juice Gang
Eurosia
Colonies Of Iwaso
The Greater Star Region Of Bleria
Western Frontier
Prussafrikan Herrkaiserreich
Abor
Solum Of Solemn Shtets
Van Diemenia
Vbc Collective
Gold Coasts
The Economic Powers Of The Nations
March Out
International Coalition Of Avox
The Old Days
Poggertopia
Amalgamated Federation Debate Council

[Frenchy II]

when you want to crash the stock market i mean tagging pool lmk

[Lamoni]

Nice job!

No I don't need your praise, thanks! It might somehow give me STDs through the computer screen with how often you hop between different groups of people.

*** Warning for flaming ***
You have no room to talk about someone else's sexuality.

[Hulldom]

when you want to crash the stock market i mean tagging pool lmk

The Stonks market can only go up from here!

[Roavin]

What we did instead was make sure every single one of our investment team remained on the ball, by taking regular hydration breaks, and making sure our hands were warm.

That's unironically a great way to characterize and utilize GCR breaks. Well done.

Also, Atlae is secretly Bernie? #JustCuriouslyObserving

[The Atlae Isles]

What we did instead was make sure every single one of our investment team remained on the ball, by taking regular hydration breaks, and making sure our hands were warm.

That's unironically a great way to characterize and utilize GCR breaks. Well done.

Also, Atlae is secretly Bernie? #JustCuriouslyObserving

I am once again asking for regular hydration breaks. Water is a fundamental human right, and the bottom 11% of people don't have access to clean water.

[Miss Bad Life Choices]

Gameplay,

I'm going to assume by now you've read this thread.

First and foremost -- the views expressed by Jakker aren't those shared by the rest of the Council and overall the Black Hawks. Jakker tied in XKI/TSP with CCD, a fascist region, due to views on regional sovereignty, then doubled down on this. Jakker should know better then to say CCD's views on regional sovereignty and XKI's views on regional sovereignty lump them together. Defenders are our IC opponents, and tying them in with the fascists is a take that should have never happened and one that we on the Council of Hawks condemn.

Secondly -- After a discussion in Council chat, we've decided (all of us) that Jakker resigning makes the most sense. Jakker will be moving to the Council Advisory Board and taking time away from the game.

Finally, I'll be rejoining the Council as Overseer of Blade Corps. Aquila (Talon), Dom (Talon), and Dax (Terra) will be maintaining their current positions within the Council.

/Signed/

The Council of Hawks:
Commander in Chief Red Back
Colonel Miss Bad Life Choices
Major Aquilanion
Major Lady Dominator
Major Pterodaxtyl

& the Council Advisory Board

[Miravana]

Soda Switching

Sergeant Miravana was tired of big soda bossing around the cola industry. In order to combat these beverage beasts, a cheap and delicious soda would need to be developed. He knew they would need to cut down on production costs, so he snatched his friend and professional syrup stealer, Frenchy II, from the campaign trail. Together, they infiltrated unsuspecting regions in order to steal their High Fructose Corn Syrup! With all of the supplies gathered at a minimal cost to the hawks, they began to concoct Dr. Hawk! After some frivolous taste testing and redesigning by Corporal Baedan, the soda was ready to hit the shelves!

Taste Testing Hawks
SGT Miravana (trigger)
CPL Baedan

Lily Syrup Stealer
Vice Presidential Candidate Frenchy II

Imperium of man
Soviet peru
Alternative do nationstates
New after the bombs region thingy
Confederation of psychotic dictatorships
Pickle foundation
Iwaku rp district
The mud fields of the pacific
Rehab for raiders
Southern maine coastal paradise
Garozia islands
Yhhh
The thalmor embassy
Game region
Volksland
Bradania
Sunshine of love
The imperial states
Realm of the great qing
World peace group
The golexaldian kingdom
Interasiatic realm
Furry
Allied nations
Rojava
Your kitten
Trallanian union
Elchland
The bordelian coast
United syndicalist workers front
The united confederation
Algebra ii
Yayafrica
Rarity booster 9
Warzone argimin

Final Design of Dr. Hawk

Once the product had been finalized, it was time to sell it! With the assistance of Sales Manager, Sakana, supermarket "contracts" with various regions were "negotiated." Pleased with the vast sums of wealth obtained, the hawks subsidized the development of more flavors, making Hawk Sodas Inc. a new cola powerhouse.

Soda Sellin' Hawks
SGT Miravana (trigger)
SGT Sakana
CPL Baedan

Lily Supermarket Supplier
Vice Presidential Candidate Frenchy II

Peaceful region
Rp da eolina
The land of card
The great europe
Confederate scottish peoples
The mycelium fields
Uionis
Teen titans
Gasolina
Baby
The companions
Some random place
Capitalis bloc
Cawdow
Absurd puppets
Scp foundation secure contain protect
Dythinia
The floridians
Averohk
Yo momma
Asiiana
United world
This decrepit hole here
Jazz world
Enewetak atoll
Egg land

[Frenchy II]

I live on Dr. Hawk. I NEED Dr. Hawk. All I could ever want in my life is Dr. Hawk. Let's create more Dr. Hawk. Make a musical about Dr. Hawk and call it Hawkmilton.

[New Republic of Roman]

The Black Hawks liked pineapple pizza so much that they traveled back in time to bring Sam Panopoulos to the future. If you want to eat pineapple pizza with us, Come Join Us!



Hawks
SGT New Republic of Roman (Trigger)
SGT Miravana
CPL Baedan
PFC Emunickle Society

Lily Merc
Vice Presidential Candidate Frenchy II

Regions Pineappled

Ted Talks Go Here
The Multiverse
Micropolis
The Conglomerate Of Royal Ashholes
Nir
Westfield
Novis Vandium
Funian Empire
The Mud Cookie Region
United Valhaven
Some Random Place
Nfl
Avalon Discord
Artifex Orbis Nova
Terra Saturna
Zone Af03
Uskavachian Commonwealth
Atlantis Iceland
The Kingdumb
The Alterran Confederacy
Nothing1
Peaceful Region
Aalin
Enviria
Xcom Universe
Meme
National Crusade Of Big Chaotic Animals

[Boston Castle]

Raiding AND bad pizza takes? Idk man, sounds kinda sus....

[New Republic of Roman]

[b]The Black Hawks decided to play blackjack in memory of Zizou and New Republic of Roman (BearBear), who both lost exorbitant amounts of money playing blackjack. They went around playing poker, slots, roulette, and, of course, blackjack at your casinos, until they had lost even more than Ziz and Bear combined. If you want to lose all of your money,
Come Join Us!



Hawks
SGT New Republic of Roman (Trigger)
CPL Baedan
PFC Wascoitan in TBH

Lily Merc
Vice Presidential Candidate Frenchy II

Hits
Archipelago Of Hermits
The Union Of Freedom
Northeast Atlantic
Holy Catholic Crusader League
Worldwide British Empire
Cerinia System
The Nexus Of The North
Undyne Camp
Shin Mutsu
Ravaged Cybertron
Esperanto Union
The Heavenly Lords Pact
The Granaarian Empire
Lnf Japanese Restaurant
Creepers Space
The Communist Nation Of Ashianda
The Multiverse
The Centrist Alliance
The United Nations Of Military Power
Bandonia
Emerlianis Union
A Region With Ur Help
The Many Allies Of Wercas
Funian Empire
Earth One

[WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW]

It's RIGGED! RIGGED!

[Benevolent Thomas]

European Roulette wheels and the lack of Craps makes these casinos a lot less appealing. I hope Zizou and BearBear weren't trying to compete against each other and not the dealer.

Also... that's a craps stick the Black Hawk is holding, not a Chip Rake which is what a roulette dealer would be using.

- Your friendly, neighborhood out of work casino dealer

[Miss Bad Life Choices]

Carl the Skeleton watches from above as the Hawks set out on their mission.

The Carl Chronicles.

In the beginning, Carl created NationStates. Now NationStates was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface, and the Spirit of Carl was hovering over the waters.

And Carl said let there be two updates. And there was two updates. Carl saw this was good, and called one update minor and one update major.

Then Carl said "let there be Absolute Update Fuckery". And there was Absolute Update Fuckery. And Carl saw this was good, and called this variance.

~~

Now we could cover all the stories from The Carl Chronicles, but these were all stories that we learned in Sunday School. So let's get to some of the stories that you may not know.

One of these stories was when Carl came across a group of raiders calling themselves the Black Hawks. The Black Hawks were an odd bunch. They talked about liquid dog. They believed in J. They held up little yellow men as deities. They were a misguided community, but they weren't so misguided they were lost to the ways of Carl.

Carl decided to visit these hawks. He came down to their nest from his ceiling fan in the sky. From his observations, he was expecting them to welcome him. After all, he was a talking skeleton. Instead the hawks were hostile. They threatened to steal his kneecaps. They threatened to dye his hair ginger. They told him he was not, as Baedan would say, "poggers".

This angered Carl immensely. Carl was the most "poggers" skeleton to exist. Whether he was living in the closet of a closeted lesbian, living on a ceiling fan above the m o r t a l s, or scaring small children on accident (skeletons are scary sometimes on accident ;-;), he was a Based:tm: skeleton.

Carl decided that the hawks must pay for their transgressions. They would either need to go out on a raid to promote the good word of Carl, or sacrifice the kneecaps of all the baby hawks for the next three months. While the Arkansas and Michigan Dumbasses had no problems with some kneecap sacrifice, for the greater good they set out on a raid. They invited their allies in The Joint Task Force, in Lily, and in 3 Guys to come worship Carl The Great Skeleton with them.

95 Places With Proper Carl Worship:

0527 blue duck
2019
Among us
Antieu
Arbor
Bad flags region
Botbois
Buffalo canada states
Canastralian union
Cascos de rolha
Christs church
Combine world
Concorde
continent of nations
Danganaruto piece bizarre rp i inne
Dax
Der bund der preussen
East carroll
East west prosperity pact
Eqeustria
Essos
Europan continent
Galactic socialist republic
Game region
Gardner dam
Geopolitics
Giga federation
Great remor
International socialism
Interregional industries
Ipherios
Isles of stationaria
Jenny
Just looking for effect line because noy
Kayden region
Kilisis
Lamnarland
Land of abisa
Lead and zinc alliance
Masquerade
Meem
Mefville
Mobile suit depot
murica
My ns nations
Nate
New cland
New polcampia
New worcester empire
Nordic countries
North europe germany
Northern peoples democratic alliance
Oceanosphere
Pawntucky
Primula
Quantia
Qwerty qwem dot com
Roadkill county
Schlesierland
Seblaria
Sefta union
Somewhere Out There
South american prosperity alliance
Sports
The 15th
The allies mynal sectors
The bordelian coast
The Christian Space Empire
The commonwealth federation
The cool boys
The diamond alliance
The divided unity of nations
The free alliance
The fridge
The frozen wastes of northrend
The furrest
The great age
The great sanctus regionem
The holy land of the bringard
The new galaxy
The phoenix nest
The republican kingdoms of europe
The union of bob saget
The united liberal imperialistic faction
The university union of nationstates
The western fertile lands
Transatlantic treaty of defense
Trash
Union of soviet socialists states
Victorian era rp
Visionia galaxy
Volcania
Warden legion
Western fields
Your moms house

The Enlightened:
The Black Hawks
Colonel Miss Bad Life Choices, High Priestess
Sergeant Miravana, High Priest

Lieutenant Drexlore
Sergeant Sakana
Sergeant Zizou
Corporal Baedan
Private First Class Marine Command
Private First Class Wascoitan

Lily
Supreme Command Frenchy II

Joint Task Force
CDR Gibraltarica

3 Guys
The Chariot, Guy 1


And Carl saw this was good. And all was right with The Black Hawks and Carl. They ended up having many adventures together before Carl finally returned to his ceiling fan in the sky, but that's another story for another time.

Amen.

[Comfed]

This is either very strange, some meme I don't know about, or both.

[Miss Bad Life Choices]

This is either very strange, some meme I don't know about, or both.

Both. But the ways of Carl the Skeleton must be spread to those who have never heard of his good ways.

[Frenchy II]

Then Carl said, let there be raids, and then there was raids. And it was good.

[Miravana]

My only grievance is the inclusion of J, as J is a false god. Carl is the only god, and believing in J is blasphemy in the face of Carl.

[Baedan]

Our Skeleton in plastic, hallowed be thy name. Your delegacy come, your raids be done, on NationStates as it is on top of Dak's ceiling fan.
Pray in Carl's name, Amen.

[Pterodaxtyl]

I can't say that this or any of the memes TBH has is what I expected when I joined.

[Boston Castle]

Once again, making me laugh. Great update!

[Roavin]

The Carl Chronicles.