[TITLE] G's Louise
[DESCRIPTION] The recent announcement of newly-developed 9G mobile data technology has resulted in as many fears as cheers, as meteorologists are claiming the radio frequencies it uses will interfere with the satellite signals used for weather forecasting across @@NAME@@.
[VALIDITY] Has space program, allows internet
[OPTION 1] "I hate to rain on your parade," frets meteorologist and avowed nephophile @@RANDOMNAME@@, "but water vapor is only detectable at 23.8GHz… the same frequency this new technology uses! We won't be able to see clouds with our satellites, or know where it's raining, or take any of the readings we need. Every cell tower and hotspot will show up as if it were a giant cloud! If they have to use a slightly less-than-ideal frequency until they invent something new, it's worth it to protect our science!"
[EFFECT 1] forecasts are accurate but nobody has the bandwidth to view them
[OPTION 2] "Gray skies are gonna clear up!" promises early-adopter and avowed technophile @@RANDOMNAME@@. "I've heard that at these high frequencies, the propagation range of the signal is quite short, and it's not like we need to install antennas in the middle of the oceans where storm systems develop. The fact is, I… err, I mean… everybody wants this tech! Just put some regulations in place that limit 9G use to populated areas, and we should get the best of both worlds, right?"
[EFFECT 2] popular sunny beaches always have a cloudy outlook
[OPTION 3] "We'll weather the weather whatever the weather, so long as we stay inside!" announces basement-dweller and avowed nyctophile @@RANDOMNAME@@. "This is just a stepping-stone to 10G and beyond, and with that kind of bandwidth, we can all just telecommute forever! Pump more money into the IT sector, and we can develop delivery drones, automated factories, and who knows what else! We'll never have to worry about going outside or facing the weather again!"
[EFFECT 3] children grow up believing the sun to be a myth
[OPTION 4] "Close the blinds!" hisses notorious scopophobe @@RANDOMNAME@@, pulling @@HIS@@ hood tight around @@HIS@@ face. "Data already moves plenty fast! Sometimes too fast, if you catch my drift. You know what this is? It's a system for emitting mind-control rays! Satellites, 9G, they work together to track people, and to force honest @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ like me to carry out the whims of the secret international cabal of the lizard people! Outlaw these fake advances!"
[EFFECT 4] activists are attempting to repeal Moore's Law