Doug Fusion's Recreational NukeLot (MT/PMT/FT, OPEN)

[Qhevak]

Howdy, Pardner!

I'm Doug Fusion, and welcome to my recreational NukeLot, for all y’all strategic and tactical fireworks needs! There’s been a lot of rumors ‘bout my true identity, with “puppet of a rogue military AI” this and “avatar of an eldritch Sun God” that, but really I’m just a good ‘ol ‘merican cowboy. Growin' up in Nevada back in the 50s, I got to see the Army settin' of nukes in their test ranges every day and night, and since then I've wanted to share that experience with everyone I've met. With good old hard work n' guts and a bit of networkin' with interstellar armament corporations, Ol' Doug was finally able to make that dream a reality.

Rules

Doug Fusion's Recreational NukeLot nukes are for recreational purposes, but ol' Doug doesn't care where you drop 'em, so long as you're havin' fun! Other than that, Doug doesn't like no rules.

Now enough talkin', it's time for some 'splosions!

[Qhevak]

Purchasing Form

You don't havta use this, but 'Ol Doug's getting a bit up in the years, so for his sake he'd prefer if you used this form and calced you're own purchases.

Code: Select all

[b]Name of purchaser:[/b]
[b]Name of country/organization/storefront (whichever applies):[/b]
[b]Technology lever of purchaser (MT, PMT, FT, FanT, etc.):[/b]
[b]The location/destination of shipments:[/b]
[b]The product(s) and number of product(s) you wish to purchase:[/b]
[b]Discounts or fees you have:[/b]
[b]Anything else you wish to inform us (may be left blank):[/b]

epic CHALICE gang members get 50% off

If all goes well your order should get to your doorstep in a week or less (25% off if not!). If ya really need a nuke urgent, ya can pay 50% extra for a two day guarantee!

[Qhevak]

Recreational Warheads

Specifications

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Diameter: 203mm
Length: 950mm
Mass: 95kg
Action: Double gun boosted fission
Yield: 0.5-50 kT
Guidance: GPS, INS, semi-active laser homing
Accuracy: 5-20m
Effective Range: 50 km
Unit Cost: $210,000 NSD

The W195 is one of the smaller nukes in Dougs collection, just right for shootin' out of a good 'ol eight inch howitzer. With both GPS and INS nav, it'll land right where you want it, and with both airburst and impact detonation options you can set it off right where it'll give the best show!

To minimize the warhead profile to allow it to fit in a howitzer in the first place, the W229 uses a double gun boosted fission warhead design. The supercritical assembly is divided into two subcritical 239Pu elements, a hollow mass and a cylindrical core, which are driven into each other with high explosives, inducing a supercritical state. Injectin' deuterium and tritium gas results in nuclear fusion by the time 1% of the fission fuel has fissioned, producing neutrons to speed up the late stage of the chain reaction and approximately double efficiency.

The W229 shell incorporates pop-up guidance fins that extend to glide the round to longer ranges after launch - around 70 km at typical barrel lengths. GPS and INS are standard, but the round is also capable of semi-active laser homing for when you change yer mind 'bout where you want it to land.

Specifications

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Diameter:54cm
Length: 150cm
Mass: 255kg
Action: 2-stage Teller-Ulam
Yield: 0.4-500 kT
Guidance: GPS, INS
Accuracy: 10m (GPS), 15m (INS)
Unit Cost: $7 million NSD

The smallest thermonuclear MT design in Doug's arsenal, the W229 is a reentry vehicle built for ICBM and SLBM party delivery. It incorporates a standard Teller-Ulam design, using a boosted-fission 239Pu primary to detonate a lithium deuteride fusion secondary. The W229 achieve yields of up to 500 kilotons and down to 0.4, perfect for parties of all sizes! With just 20% of the detonation coming from fission at max yield, it's perfect for reducin' the need for post party cleanup as well.

The W229s reentry vehicle uses GPS guidance as standard, but is capable of switching to less accurate INS in the event that the supporting GPS network is jammed or disabled. For increased accuracy and kill-probability against hardened targets, the W229 also utilizes an advanced arming, fuzing and firing system, programmed to detonate the warhead over the target if its on-board computer calculates that it has overshot its target.

Specifications

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Diameter:110 cm
Length: 295 cm
Mass: 1,900 kg
Action: 3-stage Teller-Ulam
Yield: 0.5-9 MT
Guidance: GPS, INS
Accuracy: 10m (GPS), 15m (INS)
Unit Cost: $25 million NSD

The perfect big party package, the W281 is a 9 megaton heavy warhead built specifically for ICBMs. With a 3-stage Teller-Ulam configuration, just 9% of the yield is from fission, cuttin' down those troublesome radiation shielding costs. The W229s reentry vehicle uses GPS guidance as standard, but is capable of switching to less accurate INS in the event that the supporting GPS network is jammed or disabled. For increased accuracy and kill-probability against hardened targets, the W229 also utilizes an advanced arming, fuzing and firing system, programmed to detonate the warhead over the target if its on-board computer calculates that it has overshot its target.

Specifications

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Radius: 4.1 m
Mass: 210 tons
Action: Autocatalytic
Yield: 5 GT
Unit Cost: $3.5 billion NSD

'Ol Dougs not quite sure who'd need to blast off a chunk of planetary crust to fufill their recreational needs, but for some reason the orders keep on rollin' in, 'specially from people with weird Latin names talkin' 'bout "purging heretics". 'gardless, the W420 is the biggest boy in the NukeLot, using an autocatalytic action with mutally amplifying fission and fusion explosions. Just make sure ya stand back a nice good distance when using this one recreationally. Ideally in space.

Specifications

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Diameter:140 cm
Length: 291 cm
Mass: 3,100 kg
Action: Autocatalytic
Yield: 24 MT
Guidance: Passive/Active MMW radar, IIR, NUKEDAR
Accuracy: 2m (IIR, no jamming)
Unit Cost: $35 million NSD

The next generation in tactical shipkiller warheads, the W883 Cobra improves on previous "Casaba Howitzer" type schemes with it's revolutionary Shaped Nuclear Accelerated Kinetic attack system. While the 'ol Casaba could do a hell of lot of damage at range, it was still a cartridge without a bullet. SNAK changes this by adding in a state of the art long range penetrator system. The W883 uses a composite magsail ring made out of a high strength nanomanufactured adamant mixed with a film of room temperature superconductor, mounted on top of a good 'ol 24 megaton shaped charge thermonuclear warhead. The magsail deploys to it's full width 5 seconds before firin', before bein' collapsed by the Casaba detonation into a 502 kg kinetic dart projected at a velocity of 10,000 km/s, impactin' on target with a kinetic energy of 25.1 petajoules.

Primary guidance is provided by a programmable quantum-dot array integrated into the front of the warhead, capable of providin' standard active and passive MMW radar guidance and IIR guidance. IIR is extremely vulnerable to laser dazzling, however, while MMW radar lacks the accuracy necessary for effective ranging at standoff ranges. To mitigate this, W883s are equipped with advanced sensor fusion capability, capable of combining sensory data from both other W883s and allied spacecraft to better determine the position of targeted spacecraft. In addition, the W883 comes standard with revolutionary new NUKEDAR capability. As standard, small slot are cut in the radiation case, producing a semi-directional x-ray pulse on detonation which can be used for ranging at an effective distance of 'bout 30 megameters. If ECM is getting to harsh in other bands, just light one of yer W883s up before the others and let it show them the way.

Recreational Bombs

WIP

Recreational Missiles

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Specifications

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Launch System: 40x53mm launcher
Guidance: Semi-active laser homing, active/passive MMW radar seeker, IIR, INS/GPS
Fuse: Tri-mode impact, proximity, programmable

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Width 40 mm
Length 53 mm
Mass: 2.1 kg
Warhead: 2 kT autocatalytic fission-fusion

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Propulsion: CGN solid fuel rocket
Thrust: 400 g
Total Propellant: 200 grams CGN
Peak Velocity: 450 m/s
Maximum Range: 5000 m

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Unit Cost: $15,000 NSD

For the customer lookin' to save, Nukelot presents the W756 Outlaw, a 40x53mm miniature missile small enough to be fired from standard 40x53mm launchers. To attain the small sizes required, the W756 makes use of a unique autocatalytic action to drop the detonator mass, implodin' a shell of U235 onto a magnetized deuterium–tritium (DT) plasma. After havin' reached a high temperature, the DT plasma releases fusion neutrons makin' fission reactions in the fissile shell increasin' the implosion velocity which in turn increases the fusion reaction rate until full ignition of the DT plasma. To implode the fissile shell a small amount of high explosive and to magnetize the DT plasma a small auxiliary electric discharge are required. In comparison to nuclear bomb pulse propulsion, the energy released per pulse is much smaller and the efficiency higher. Unfortunately, autocatalytic warheads ain't attaining yields below a few kilotons - the W756's yield is therefore set at 2kT.

While the size of a standard 40x53mm grenade, the high density of the round prevents use of a standard high-low launch system. It therefore utilizes a micro-gyrojet launch system makin' use of a cubic gauche nitrogen metastable solid fuel rocket, attainin' maximum speed at 25 meters from the barrel. In-flight maneuverin' is provided by four foldin' low aspect ratio tail-fins retracted into the tail of the rocket.

Primary guidance is provided by a programmable quantum-dot array integrated into the skin, capable of providin' standard active and passive MMW radar guidance, IIR guidance, and semi-active laser guidance. INS/GPS guidance is also available.

WIP

Specifications

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Launch System: Road mobile launcher
Guidance: INS

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Width 1.2m
Length 17 m
Dry Mass unloaded: 5.1 tons
Dry Mass w. payload: 8.2 tons
Loaded Mass: 35 tons
Warhead: W883 Cobra

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Propulsion: CGN solid fuel rocket
Thrust: 10.3 MN
Delta-V 6.24 km/s
Peak Velocity: 5.86 km/s w/ standard launch procedure
Maximum Altitude: 110 km

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Unit Cost: $14 million NSD

Ya ever got alien invaders thinking they're so nice and safe in their comfy little spaceships, ortillerying your cities up in geosynchronous orbit? Buy the all-new "Gopher" pop-up ASAT missile, and make 'em wish they never left the slimy planet they came from!

The "Gopher" is a 35 ton lightweight suborbital missile, designed to send a W883 "Cobra" from 0 to 100 in under 30, spearing targets past geosynchronous orbit before they know what hit 'em. Intended to be road transportable, the Gopher can easily be reconfigured for launch from underground bunkers and submarines, making it the perfect low-observability planetary defence mechanism.

On launch, the Gopher's high thrust solid fuel rocket engines accelerates it at an initial rate of 30 gees, reachin' an altitude of 25 kilometers and velocity of 5.86 km/s at engine cutoff T+11 seconds after launch. High performance MNT diamondoid adamant construction protects the missile from the extreme temperatures incurred in the low altitude high velocity regime, while internal INS navigation and maneuverin' fins keep the Gopher straight n' steady. After cutoff, the missile cruises until warhead deployment and target acquisition at T+19 and 70 km altitude, followed by SNAK firin' at T+26 and 110 km altitude. Secondary CGN solid micro boosters provide random 10 m/s kicks each second between engine cutoff and warhead deployment, reducin' vulnerability to interception.

WIP

Extra

If you need a nice place to sit when watchin' the nice recreational boom you just set off, NukeLot offers folding chairs in all colors for just $19.99 NSD a piece.

Watchin' a live nuclear explosion ain't so good if you go blind at the end! Buy our Nuke Goggles for just $19.99 each to make sure you don't.

NukeLot CBRN suits are perfect for the enterprising blast viewer who wants to get a bit closer to the explosion without getting any unfortunate lumps. Guaranteed compliant with STANAG 2521 CBRN requirements or money back!
$299.99 each.

Shirts with our trademark logo. $19.99 each.

There's only one thing better than watchin' a live nuclear 'splosion, and that's watchin' a live nuclear explosion on some very strong drugs. We sell at $24.99 for ten 100 microgram tabs, guaranteed pure LSD-25 or yer money back!

Please check your nation's drug laws bef-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA couldn't keep it up.

you'd better be having this much gear when you use it 'less you're looking for a very painful death

Length: 102cm
Mass: 11.4 kg (flame gun), 19 kg (empty), 21 kg (full)
Fuel: 2% Uranium Tetrabromide enriched water
Feed System: Backpack tank, 2 kg capability
Muzzle Velocity: 78.48 km/s
Output Power: 12.4 MW
Firing Time: 500 seconds
Effective Range: 200 meters
Cost: $50,000

What's better'n a flamethrower? AN ATOMIC FLAMETHROWER! Using the same Nuclear Saltwater fuel used on our famous Super Genie missile, NukeLot the Flamethrower'll guarantee the radioactive annihilation of anything in your path.

[Hanshire]

Noted

[Ximea]

We will watch your storefront with great interest.

[Hanshire]

Name of purchaser: George Layfield: Head of National Security
Name of country/organization/storefront (whichever applies): Hansireian Federal Government
Technology lever of purchaser (MT, PMT, FT, FanT, etc.): N/A
The location/destination of shipments: One at the capital of each province (must be sent to the government)
The product(s) and number of product(s) you wish to purchase: 30 Chungas Super Strategic Nuke PMT+
Discounts or fees you have: N/A
Anything else you wish to inform us (may be left blank): We'd love to invest into your store with $750,000,000 for 25% equity and 30% royalty of each unit sold

[Qhevak]

This storefront is WIP rn, but I'll answer your order when it's done.

[Hanshire]

This storefront is WIP rn, but I'll answer your order when it's done.

Sounds good

[Qhevak]

Name of purchaser: George Layfield: Head of National Security
Name of country/organization/storefront (whichever applies): Hansireian Federal Government
Technology lever of purchaser (MT, PMT, FT, FanT, etc.): N/A
The location/destination of shipments: One at the capital of each province (must be sent to the government)
The product(s) and number of product(s) you wish to purchase: 30 Chungas Super Strategic Nuke PMT+
Discounts or fees you have: N/A
Anything else you wish to inform us (may be left blank): We'd love to invest into your store with $750,000,000 for 25% equity and 30% royalty of each unit sold

Thanks for the order, pardner!

The 30 W420s will be shipped as soon the the $105 billion is wired. Sadly, Doug ain't lookin' for business pardners right now, so he'll havta say no on that request.

Doug Fusion
Doug Fusion's Recreational NukeLot

[Hanshire]

The money has been sent. If you ever want to go into business together let me know

[Ximea]

Name of purchaser: Bio-Sciences Division
Name of country/organization/storefront (whichever applies): Scientific Technocracy of Ximea
Technology level of purchaser (MT, PMT, FT, FanT, etc.): PMT mostly, FT bio/medical
The location/destination of shipments: Ultima Thule Arctic Isolation Facility
The product(s) and number of product(s) you wish to purchase:

• W756 40mm MicroTactical Gyrojet, 120 units ($1.8 million total)
• Nuke goggles, 120 units ($2398.80 total)
• CBRN suits, 120 units ($35,998.80 total)
• NukeLot the Flamethrower, 20 units (no price listed)
• W420 Chungus Super Strategic Nuke, 5 units ($17.5 billion total)

Discounts or fees you have: We will gladly pay the additional 50% for two-day shipping
Anything else you wish to inform us (may be left blank): We would pay a premium for pure-fusion weapons, if you can acquire them.

[Qhevak]

Name of purchaser: Bio-Sciences Division
Name of country/organization/storefront (whichever applies): Scientific Technocracy of Ximea
Technology level of purchaser (MT, PMT, FT, FanT, etc.): PMT mostly, FT bio/medical
The location/destination of shipments: Ultima Thule Arctic Isolation Facility
The product(s) and number of product(s) you wish to purchase:

• W756 40mm MicroTactical Gyrojet, 120 units ($1.8 million total)
• Nuke goggles, 120 units ($2398.80 total)
• CBRN suits, 120 units ($35,998.80 total)
• NukeLot the Flamethrower, 20 units (no price listed)
• W420 Chungus Super Strategic Nuke, 5 units ($17.5 billion total)

Discounts or fees you have: We will gladly pay the additional 50% for two-day shipping
Anything else you wish to inform us (may be left blank): We would pay a premium for pure-fusion weapons, if you can acquire them.

Thanks for the order, pardner!

That will be $26,254,257,596.4 NSD at current prices. Due to their designs, our autocatalytic weapons ain't practically convertible to pure fusion, but our Teller-Ulam warheads could be converted to operate with a pure fusion antimatter catalyzed first stage at 50% markup.

Doug Fusion
Doug Fusion's Recreational NukeLot

[Synne Industries]

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Name of purchaser:

• [RSI/NG]-'Someone Nameless' 1/20^th share

Name of country/organization/storefront (whichever applies):]

• The Rising Sun Initiative (Partial affiliation only)

Technology lever of purchaser (MT, PMT, FT, FanT, etc.):

• Tech bracket nonconforming

The location/destination of shipments:

• "Toss em' anywhere you'd like, I'll pick up the order myself."

The product(s) and number of product(s) you wish to purchase:

• 910 × W756 'Outlaw' 40mm MicroTactical Gyrojet ($13,650,000.00 NSD)
  
• 1 × Folding Chair ($19.99)
• 1 × NukeLot T-shirt ($19.99)
• [DISCOUNT] -50% -25%
• Total: $10,237,530 NSD

Discounts or fees you have:

• [CHALICE] -50% -25% "Slashing my discount to show my financial support!"

Anything else you wish to inform us (may be left blank):

• "Gonna use these for a little prank. I'll be recording the results and I can send ya' the video if you'd like."

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[Qhevak]

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Name of purchaser:

• [RSI/NG]-'Someone Nameless' 1/20^th share

Name of country/organization/storefront (whichever applies):]

• The Rising Sun Initiative (Partial affiliation only)

Technology lever of purchaser (MT, PMT, FT, FanT, etc.):

• Tech bracket nonconforming

The location/destination of shipments:

• "Toss em' anywhere you'd like, I'll pick up the order myself."

The product(s) and number of product(s) you wish to purchase:

• 910 × W756 'Outlaw' 40mm MicroTactical Gyrojet ($13,650,000.00 NSD)
  
• 1 × Folding Chair ($19.99)
• 1 × NukeLot T-shirt ($19.99)
• [DISCOUNT] -50% -25%
• Total: $10,237,530 NSD

Discounts or fees you have:

• [CHALICE] -50% -25% "Slashing my discount to show my financial support!"

Anything else you wish to inform us (may be left blank):

• "Gonna use these for a little prank. I'll be recording the results and I can send ya' the video if you'd like."

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Thanks for the order, pardner!

Order's already dropped off, see attached for the coordinates. Send the vid if ya can, need a good laugh given the times.

coordinates.pdf

Doug Fusion
Doug Fusion's Recreational NukeLot

[The Disorder]

While the Order of Disorder has very narrow & specific requirements for its warheads, and is not in a position to outsource its warhead production, we would like to offer our sincerest endorsements and praise for this business. Doug Fusion's Recreational NukeLot performs an essential service to the international community, granting fair, equal, and impartial access to fission & fusion devices for all buyers.

Nuclear proliferation businesses are dreadfully underrepresented in the international economy, and many nations would condemn this noble & honorable enterprise. The Order of Disorder is not among them. We fully support nuclear armament.

For the good of all chaos.