Awesome/Funny NS Quotes (Not Your Own Quotes, Please!)

[Ibakobit Xhepn]

How dare yous say I look like Adam Sandlers. You should be ashamed brethren!

It's... it's just so random.

[Borderlands of Rojava]

Currently the governments which still exist that are the most Nazi like are either China or North Korea. Both countries aren't half bad. Philosophically it isn't my cup of tea, but they do have the prerequisite nationalism and devotion to building up strong militaries, and have free reign to micromanage their citizenry much as a Fascist would like to.

I can't argue with the results which is that the Chinese system has prevailed against liberal democracies in terms of might and progress.

Why do you keep trying to make Nazism work? They tried it, millions of people died, they lost, and Hitler's inner circle became the original suicide squad. The end.

[Kandorith]

https://forum.nationstates.net/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&u=1411400

The mods eat well tonight.

Okay, just so you know, we do not eat DOS nations. I mean, really, think about it, would you want to eat one of those? Ick.

Yea...... I laughed so bloody hard at this.

[Heloin]

What group do you think I am in?

I love that people are sociological cats. By that, I mean that whenever confronted with a set of social boxes to stuff in, humans will not hesitate to sit in one of them.

[Nuroblav]

when the UK breaks up do you think people will still do the british chicken thing or will they change to NATIVE ENGLISH CHIKCENS

[Katganistan]

From the pet thread:

As a NationStates moderator, I have a gaggle of several thousand adorable forum posters that I lavish affection on most days of the week.

Occasionally I have to discipline them by spraying around some red text, especially if one of them gets obstreperous and starts shitting all over the forums, but most of the time they're rewardingly well house-trained.

Here, let me scratch you behind the ear.

[Odreria]

I mean, this is the guy who pronounced Yosemite as "YO-se-MIGHT" and "YO-sem-mi-NIGHT".

Trump when his best Jewish friend shows up to his birthday party: "Yo Semite"

[Picairn]

Well, here's the rub and something that the skinny jean crowd tend not to understand. It's not an either/or proposition.

The founding fathers were not remarkable because they were beings of pure light and intent that descended upon the colonies to Tinkerbell a perfect union into place. They were a bunch of lawyers and land owners and slave owners who had points of view that either didn't age well or were shitty no matter what the age. These waddling examples of imperfection whose lives and beliefs can be critiqued did form a sustainable framework for a self governed country at a time that such a thing wasn't common and put in the one caveat that has made all the difference: The idea that they might have fucked up. That whatever it is they think solved all the problems, it hasn't. People will change and the country will need to be able to change with it. They created an ideal that they never lived up to and the country they created never lived up to, but-often kicking and screaming-the country has been dragged closer and closer to that ideal. The framers didn't free the slaves. They didn't enfranchise poor laborers. They didn't give women the vote. But they created a mechanism for the country to do so, and in a way created a system that would force itself to do that.

It's not that great men did good things. It's regular ass shitty men created a system that could be better than those who created it. All you have to do is engage with it. That's why the status quo loves hipsters. Go ahead, get disenfranchised by the lives of people from 250 years ago. Squint your eyes enough that you can't tell the difference between political parties. Talk about the insurmountable power of industrial complexes. Take your hands off the wheel and let the devil drive. You get to pretend that you're not the sucker in this scenario.

[Nooooooooooooooo]

Breaking: Trump accuses Joe Biden of venting

Blue did look pretty sus.

Blue did look pretty sus.

But you would be a fool to trust orange.

---

From a Ban Cars GA proposal:

This doesn't go far enough, I say we ban Disney as a whole!

[Borderlands of Rojava]

Inspiring incompetent followers to murder millions of people is a contribution to society?

"Blommunidm is when you kill 999999(a lot) of people"
-Carl Mark

[Picairn]

there is nothing wrong with a totalitarian military dictatorship, dissenters would be killed yes but it is worth it.

Italy 1922 be like "there is nothinga wronga with a totalitarian dictatorshippa, dissenters would be a shotta yes but itsa worth it"
Italy 1943 be like "how the gabagool did we lose all of our colonies plussa Sicilia with our wonderful totalitarian dictatorshippa"

Germany 1933 be like "zere is nozing vrong viz a totalitarien diktatorschip, dißenters woüld be killed ja büt it is vorz it"
Germany 1945 be like "hov ze fück did ve lose all of oür territory viz oür vonderfül totalitarien diktatorschip"

[Tinhampton]

Here on NSG, Sanghyeok posted "To remain a child forever?" at 3am BST today:

Please consider the below scenario:

Imagine one day you are walking along on your way home, as an ordinary underpaid and overworked 25 year old with no career prospects, when you see a poor grey coloured cat with red eyes being chased by a pack of dogs. You save the poor cat from the dogs, and to your surprise it starts speaking.

"Thank you for saving me!" it says, and you gasp. Then, it tells you something else: "I used to be able to grant wishes using magical powers. However, now I can only make one of them happen: the wish to remain a child forever."

Curious, you ask the cat (whose name is Nozomi, by the way) what this means.

"Well, every time you become 18, your life will be reset, and you go back to the day you were born! You will have no memories of that time, and be able to live endless childhoods. How does it sound?"

You consider for a moment, and Nozomi creates two magic wands with his powers.

"The pink wand will allow you to enter that cycle, while the azur wand will let you remain a normal human with a normal life."

You reach out, ready to take one of them into your hands. But which one will you choose?

I choose the pink wand. I don't miss my childhood too much, but I don't want to lose my innocence and naivety.

Not to be outdone, Nevertopia posted "To accept a cursed wish?" at 3:45pm BST today, or about 13 hours later:

Please consider the following scenario:

Imagine one day you are walking along on your way home, as an ordinary underpaid and overworked 25 year old with no career prospects, when you see a poor grey coloured cat with red eyes being chased by a pack of dogs. You save the poor cat from the dogs, and to your surprise it starts speaking.

"Thank you for saving me!" it says, and you gasp. Then, it tells you something else: "I used to be able to grant wishes using magical powers. However, now I can only make one of them happen: the cursed wish to grant you $200,000 American legal tender!"

Curious, you ask the cat (whose name is Y'shtola, by the way) what this means.

"Well, once I grant you this wish you will play the lottery and win $200,000. Unfortunately you grow permanent, fully functioning taste-buds in your butthole that cannot be removed or be subverted in any way. How does it sound?"

You consider for a moment, and Y'shtola creates two magic wands with his powers.

"The pink wand will allow you to win $200,000, while the brown wand will let you remain a normal human with a normal butthole."

The wands throb with power.

You reach out, ready to take one of them into your hands. But which one will you choose?

[Cannot think of a name]

Are we sure McCarthy is not immortal? Because despite the fact he supposedly died in 1957 it feels like he is still here sometimes.

Maybe the real McCarthy was the friends we blacklisted along the way.

[Kowani]

Anyway I'm writing in Juan Guaido because it's time to take a stand for democracy

[Ellbonnia]

To understand the origins of anime, we must first understand the fall of Babylon.

[Diarcesia]

Is this part of TET is having a significant NS event today?

Anyway...

Photograph it

Yes. We need an image dump.

[Borderlands of Rojava]

Reinforcements have come. Now there are 4 cops here. The downstairs neighbors and the manager have gone to the apartment office.

[Nuroblav]

When I'm in charge I will expect people to read in four dimensions and across multiple timelines.

I'm harsh, but I'm as harsh on myself and I'll only do it because I care.

[Tinhampton]

You know what? Maybe we should start supporting all these attempts to commend TNP. See how many simultaneous commends we can collect.

Edit: Can you condemn me too? That'd be great.

[Borderlands of Rojava]

Where were you when C/CLT is kill?

Edit: I was sat at home, creating diarcesia when mod posted

"C/CLT is die"

"no"

This one made me laugh as much as the blommuidm quite from Cordel and the Nazi suicide squad quote from Ruso.

[Ellbonnia]

IT HAD BETTER BE INFLATABLE.

[Cordel One]

The toilets need unclogging regularly. Now I do understand that such a task is not popular, but it's always better than the alternative.

The job of clogging toilets sounds like a relatively easy one. Never realised that these individuals were on the pay roll but management does what management does.

[Andsed]

Its not acceptable because it jeopardizes the continued survival and separation of the various skin colors. The White race in particular is at risk of going extinct because broadly speaking, majority White countries are the only portions of the world becoming too diverse via immigration (which in my opinion, is proving more harmful than being of any benefit).

I'd shag a black woman to spite you.

The best way to respond to someone bitching about interracial couples.

[The Huskar Social Union]

(Image)

I have been immortalised in meme form. Surely there can be no greater honour in the halls of Nationstates.

[Borderlands of Rojava]

(Image)

I have been immortalised in meme form. Surely there can be no greater honour in the halls of Nationstates.

Oh my God I just realized those weren't just random guys. They were supposed to be Sai and you lmfao