Cup of Harmony Seventy-Eight: Everything Thread

[Vdara]

Tings Be Only Gettin’ Better!

After th’ 1-1 draw wi’ Riena, it be time for th’ S.S. Doom N’ Gloom tae hoist th’ anchor an’ set sail towards th’ Brannigan Stadium! Despite th’ scallywags feelin’ like they be hornswaggled out o’ a win, they still be in high spirits - especially wi’ all the’ grog in their bellies.

Aboard the S.S. Doom N’ Gloom

Cap’n Peg-Leg: ”Ahoy, laddies! I know that ye all be quite disappointed after that result, but dinnae be. There be no need for any bad attitudes, since we still be top o’ th’ group, after all!”

A few scallywags nodded in agreement.

Cap’n Peg-Leg: ”Anyhow, tings be only gettin’ better. Speaking o’ that, I be thinkin’ that it’s time for a shanty, yarrrrr?”

Th’ scallywags jibbed back wi’ plenty o’ “yarrrrr”s. Grog-filled pirates do enjoy a good shanty.

Cap’n Peg-Leg brought out a device that seemed tae be usin’ somethin’ called “ee-lek-tris-ity”. It be a magic thing, that “ee-lek-tris-ity”. The Cap’n hit some button on th’ device, an’ a shanty started tae ring out. This not be any shanty, however. This not even be a traditional shanty. It be ’Things Can Only Get Better’ by D:Ream. Even though th’ scallywags could hardly discern what kind o’ song it be, they started dancin’. It be a funky tune, certainly.

Cap’n Peg-Leg: ”I don’t know what this be, but I be likin’ it! In fact, I be likin’ this more than some other shanties! Anyhow, we be settin’ sail th’ now, so just enjoy th’ funky shanty an’ keep watchin’ out for whales n’ shit!”

Cap’n Peg-Leg be correct. Th’ shanty be quite enjoyable, an’ it certainly be helpin’ tae pass th’ time on th’ way to the new stadium. Tings be only gettin’ better, and th’ results hopefully be provin’ that, y’know?

[Yue Zhou]

Across the nation, thousands of interested viewers click a new video link from popular analysis channel 提佛 Football. Music starts to play.

"Yincheng Capitals bought their way to the top of the Yue Premier League table last season, with a bevy of foreign transfers including Askaris Lethe Cirvante and Dramane Cagarin propelling them to a first-place finish, fifteen points clear of Beian Rovers in second. But while the personnel Yincheng have brought in ensured their success last season, the departures of Cirvante and Cagarin have left their IFCF and YPL hopes next year suddenly uncertain."

HOW CAPITALS CAN REPLACE CIRVANTE AND CAGARIN

"Last season, manager Liang Bo utilized a counterattacking 4-3-3 formation, with the intention of focusing more on the IFCF places rather than playing a possession-based approach that would only work in the YPL. In midfield, Yang Tao and Lethe Cirvante were both given license to drift forwards, while Zhao Luxi dropped back and served as more of a deep-lying playmaker. Meanwhile, Yincheng emphasized counterattacking through the flanks, where the defensive stability of Han Jian and Zhu Aiguo ensured plenty of chances for the full-backs to bomb forwards. Up front, the tirelessness of the wide forwards, as well as the goalscoring prowess of Wang Jiahui, ensured a dangerous counterattacking, tirelessly pressing side that could punch above its weight on the international stage."

"However, while this approach worked reasonably well in the IFCF, Yincheng were unable to overcome a superior Montreal Koreana side, hanging tight with the Quebecois but ultimately losing 5-4 on aggregate. And while they were able to romp to a league title, their counterattacking system struggled against teams that parked the bus, much more than their final record might indicate."

"For instance, while the match occurred after the title was all but wrapped up, second-place Beian Rovers' surprise 2-0 away victory over the Yue champions gave a blueprint for other YPL teams to beat the Capitals at their own game. Rovers sat back and parked the bus, waiting for Capitals to overextend themselves before using their pace and the trickery of striker Luo Dan to repeatedly feed long balls over the top of the Yincheng defense. Even more notably than the two goals Rovers managed in this fashion was how they were, with Cirvante out, able to completely shut the Capitals out of the game."

"While it's Cagarin who took home the Golden Gloves last year, Cirvante proved to be even more valuable than the goalkeeper. Cirvante offered an incisive, creative presence with top-tier passing, offering another dimension to a previously-stagnant offense. Without the attacking midfielder, Yincheng were unable to break down teams that parked the bus, who were more than content to watch them struggle on the ball. Wang Jiahui is talented but overly one-dimensional, while the wide forwards lacked the creative prowess to substitute for Cirvante, and Yang Tao was usually too happy to sit back and let the Askari international take care of the more attacking side of things."

"The neutralized threat of the Capitals' Cirvante-less attack carried over to the defense, too. With Lu and Ma having to push up more to compensate for a loss of creativity with increased numbers, Yincheng were even more open in the back, with only Zhao, Han, and Zhu available to handle any through balls. While Zhu Aiguo's athleticism and Han Jian's composure meant they were able to paper over the gaps even without Cirvante, Zhao Luxi is just not quick enough to compensate, nor was his distribution an effective replacement for Cirvante's."

"As such, while Cagarin's substitute Luo Zheren should be able to deputize for now (and Wang Bo or even Nephara-based Ruo Xiaolan are possible options if Luo is found wanting), we're more concerned about finding a creative but hard-working midfielder for Cirvante. We've prepared three options for Liang Bo and company."

"Yincheng's first option is Li Jing, a 22-year-old midfielder for SC Jiangdong. Li's progressive passes per 90, as well as his shots per 90, were both in the ninety-fifth percentile for YPL midfielders, ensuring that he's a well-rounded attacking midfielder. Li is also young, meaning he could be a shrewd long-term investment for Capitals, and has a high defensive workrate. Li's entrance would shift the AM position from more of a pure playmaker to a more all-rounded, #8 type, but the distribution abilities of Zhao and Yang could more than compensate for Li's more incisive approach."

"Yincheng's second option is Wen Xiaohui, the 20-year-old starlet from Interdimensional Misei. Wen left Dynamo Dalian under shaky circumstances, and her poor relationship with the YFA may color her opinion of rejoining the Capitals. However, she's definitely a talent, putting up very high progressive passing accuracy and assist marks during her time with Dynamo and Misei. Wen Xiaohui could also legitimize Yincheng's presence on the international stage, as it does have a reputation of only signing government loyalists. While Wen may be an unlikely signing, she's definitely a more direct substitution for Cirvante."

"Our choice, however, is Ibrahim Sangaré of Toulouse. While Sangaré is a defensive midfielder by trade, his presence could allow both Yang Tao and Zhao Luxi to play more attack-minded roles. Sangaré would anchor the defense, allowing Zhao to drift forwards and Yang to shoulder more playmaking responsibility, while also solving the defensive frailty that Yincheng had without Cirvante and allowing the fullbacks to play more aggressively. While he does have the disadvantage of 'not existing in this reality', Sangaré's height and youth make him our pick for Yincheng's midfield replacement."

[HUElavia]

An Erratic HUElavia Gets 1st Ever Victory in CoH!

After a 3-2 loss to Indusse, HUElavia managed to get a 2-0 Win over Electrum. Hamada scored the two goals in the victory against Electrum. Now, we got Sulsuland, and Astograth, which the A-Team will play with Lobato in goal and Cristiano as Captain. All we can hope and pray is for victories and other matches to fall in our favor. It's time to give our all.

FORÇA HUELAVIA! VAMOS HUELAVIA! GO HUELAVIA!

[Tioguldos]

TROUBLE BACK HOME
Part 2: Tilde

Barkenuse: It's a city located north of Tioguldós. Tilde Lomifal grew up in a town near Barkenuse.

Bonbokh u Piche: It is another People's Republic that became independent from Orkasduso during the Tiog Revolution. It is located northwest of Tioguldós and west of Orkasduso.

Borosó Corridor: Located to the south of Orkasduso, on the border with Tioguldós, it constitutes the only overland crossing that connects the most significant city of Orkasduso with the rest of the territory, since to the north is the Borosó River.

BR: Before the Revolution.

Giasekh Ourakh: The capital and largest city in Orkasduso, located on the border with Tioguldós. It's the only Orkasdusian land not claimed by Tioguldós.

Muko Tiog: It's the Tiog professional football league.

Orkasduso: It is the nation from which Tioguldós became independent. It still controls the north of the territory, claimed by the People's Republic.

PLA: The People's Liberation Army of Tioguldós. It was created a few years before the start of the Revolution.

Tilde Lomifal was born in Retokh, forty kilometers south of Barkenuse, in 23 BR. Like many other children from Orkasduso, little Tilde dreamed of playing football when he grew up. With his friends, they played day and night; in the mud, in the rain, completely dirty. Football was his way of disconnecting from the world, from the harsh reality. His parents worked in the textile industry, in terrible working conditions, and spent most of their time away from home. Tilde would go to school early in the morning, eat there, and then spend every afternoon in a field where he and his friends had made two rudimentary goals with sticks. He had only one pair of shoes and was forbidden by his parents to wear them to play. Instead, he played barefoot. At the age of thirteen, he began to do jobs for the residents of the town. He mowed the lawn, painted a wall, or took an order to deliver something on his bike, usually for a few coins. With his savings, he bought his first pair of cleats. He bought them used from a cousin. When he showed them to his friends, everyone was amazed. It was as if he had brought an alien artifact to the field.

Outside of the football field, Tilde was an unfortunate child. However, playing football, he was admired by everyone in town. Everyone expected big things from him. Not only because he played much better than the other kids but also because of his impressive physique. From a very young age, he was much taller and robust than the others. For that reason, he played on his neighborhood team with older kids. Until, at the age of sixteen, PO Rolusk from Giasekh Ourakh offered him a youth contract. Tilde traveled to the big city to fulfill his dream. For two years, he trained in the under-18 team, and in 5 BR, he made his debut in the Orkasdusian first division. He finally made it. His childhood friends took a bus from Retokh every Sunday to watch Rolusk's games, just in case Tilde entered the field, even though he was a center-back. Two years later, Tilde earned a place in the first team.

Little did Tilde know that a much harsher future awaited him. Like out of nowhere, one day, the Nor fam Bmodo uprising started. The people took up arms to fight for a better country. Many of his teammates left Orkasduso as soon as the revolutionaries took a few cities. However, Tilde understood why they were fighting. He had been through the same injustice in his childhood. Now he had a lot of money in the bank. He could stay in Giasekh Ourakh, where there were no riots, or leave the country and try his luck abroad. But no, he couldn't. He felt the duty to fight for all those who cannot escape hunger playing football. As soon as he could, without telling anyone, he left everything behind and traveled south, towards the lands taken, already claimed as Tioguldós.
Once in Norfam Bmodo, Tilde went to the Communist Party of Tioguldós to be assigned a mission. He spent three years in the guerrilla, raiding Dosfum and getting weapons for the fight in the north. Once they took the entire southern zone, he withdrew from the battle and found his old passion: football. He played a few years in different clubs, traveling throughout Tioguldós.

When the armed struggle ceased, and the organization of the People's Republic started, the Football Federation of Tioguldós created a professional football league. At that moment, Tilde knew it was time to go back north, to Barkenuse, the big city closest to his hometown. There he appeared in Pmig Enako, the club where he played the last season of the Muko Tiog, and with which he finished in third place. His outstanding performances opened the doors to the national team. Although he is 33 years old, he is one of the few Tiog players who received professional training during his youth. He played in the starting lineup in the Baptism of Fire 73, and then in most matches of the World Cup 86 Qualifiers. And it seemed that, due to his physical condition, he could play a few more years at the highest level. Everything seemed to go uphill. But Tilde is enlisted to the Militia. He has been since his times fighting in Dosfum. When the conflict restarted, the PLA decided to keep the army in position and use the militiamen as tactical support. Tilde was called into action and had to travel to Posboso to support the revolutionaries in North Tioguldós. Unfortunately, his football career may end here. However, he may go down in history as a national hero.

[Twicetagram and JYPe]

Home >> Sports >> International

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Augustin Vladimirescu injured for potentially a few months
By Antonov Vasiliev

In the 3-3 draw against Murphtannia the Lieutenants suffered a lot of blows. For one, a draw meant we didn’t solidify first place in the group. This also showed that the defense looked very vulnerable despite us playing very defensive tactically.
Another blow was that Augustin Vladimirescu suffered a horror injury in the penalty box as his bones could be seen sticking out. It is said that he will miss the rest of the group stage matches and potentially the rest of the tournament.
“It’s a really bad injury, but all I can do is hope that August gets a smooth recovery,” said Ryoviste after the match had ended.
We face Xanneria and The Jovannic tomorrow. While we should be able to beat the Jovannic comfortably Xanneria will prove to be a hard task, further worsened with Vladimirescu’s injury.

[Astograth]

Previously

Vaudrail cleared his throat. He hadn’t known what to expect from this “Master”, but the meeting was going well, all things considered.

“The last team in our group is a bit… different. Astograth did very poorly the last them we played against each other.”

The Master turned from smiling at Kiriano to look at Vaudrail, and where we was pointing on the sheet of paper. His eyes nearly popped out of his head.

“The name’s Sul- ”

“DO NOT SAY IT!” screamed The Master, flailing his arms in front of the manager’s face. “DO NOT!”. His voice lowered to a whisper. “The name attracts His attention”.

“Whose?” asked Kiriano in a low voice, flicking his eyes between Vaudrail and the mystic.

The Master licked his lips. “His True Name you already know. He has gone by other names amongst other peoples. The Masked One. The One Who Likes Fish. The Sneezeshifter. And He has a large host of friends and family…”. The Master’s voice trailed off, his eyes staring blankly past the visitors.

Olibondeka’s manager and assistant manager glanced at each other, then back at The Master.

“Ahem,” said Vaudrail. The Master kept his eyes fixed. Vaudrail turned around, but the only thing there were the dark curtains leading to the dim corridor. “Is everything all right?” asked the Sicoutian.

Twelve heartbeats passed. The Master blinked, and re-centred his gaze on Vaudrail. “Yes. He didn’t hear us. We’re safe here.” He smiled. “We’re safe here.”

“He can hear us here? From… wherever he is?” asked Kiriano, incredulity embittering his voice.

“Sonnel. The Devourer of the Sea is in Sonnel. And no, He cannot hear us, but he could – if we pronounced His True Name, for example.”

Vaudrail wrung his hands. “So- so how can we beat them? Him and his friends?”

The Master’s eyes grew wide again. “You cannot! No one can! Many have tried… Masters much stronger than myself. Trained in the Albrecht School, too. But the Wooden-faced Beasts remain in Sonnel, in that… that…,” the man struggled for words, and sighed. “That… place… they call a homeland.”
“Is it that terrible?” asked Kiriano. “I mean, I’ve seen some matches of theirs, there’s a lot of grass and trees… I know several of the guys who played there for World Cup 79…”

“Ah, right,” said The Master, snapping back upright. “You’re the football people. Yes. That’s different. You can beat them at football, I suppose, with fish, or maybe Channel 5 News. It depends on how They’re feeling, but you could distract them that way. But plan around this match as if you will lose it. Because it is likely”.

“What about the anti-tank rifle?” asked Kiriano.

The Master rolled his eyes. “This will work against robots and simple extradimensional organics, not a Primordial Piscivore”. He shrugged. “But I guess you could try”.

[Savigliane]

"Here's the cross into the box, takes a deflection, and falls at the feet of Crownfish - who fires it home! After falling behind 3-1, Springmont have suddenly gone within one of the Swans with just ten minutes to play! A disastrous deflection off the left boot of Adelaîde García and Crownfish fires low and hard past Notari to make it Savigliane three, Spr-"

"We interrupt this live coverage of Cup of Harmony 78 to bring you some breaking news from the Election. Populistas party leader Victoria Caravaggio, believed to be a contender to be the first female prime minister in Savigliane's history, has also stepped down! While Caravaggio's reason for resignation is yet unknown, it, like Canaveri, is also believed to be tied to the recent crisis and possibly also stress-related issues. As a result, the Populistas will need to replace Caravaggio before the election. While the relatively moderate, conciliatory Claudio Gusto has come in to serve as an interim leader, many of the more outspoken members of the party have called for a new leader before the general elections. The more left-wing elements of the party favor Alberto Caccini, the anti-Canaveri firebrand, while the more authoritarian elements favor Miranda Russo."

"We now return to the Cup of Harmony 78 live coverage after those breaking news. But don't let that distract you from Savigliane blowing a three-one lead, as Fjetland's dispossession of Gigi Vitale led to a counter-attack that culminated in a beautiful finish from Mayfirth. With just five minutes to play, Springmont has leveled!"

[Megistos]

4th Place
We're getting closer and closer to the Cup of Harmony knockouts, but we still have 3 more games left to play. 2-2 and 2-1 are the results for today.

Huayramarca - 1

Attacker (78'): Dribbled past Fran and Fri and shot the ball above Becks sliding body but just underneath the crossbar from a difficult angle.

Megistos - 2

Fran (26'): Received the ball, planned to cross it with his left but his cross had too much of an angle toward the goal and curled in the inside-side netting for a goal, regardless of intentions.
Robertson (41'): Scored from a header, used Fran's power from the cross coming from the right side of the field to head the ball in the bottom corner from 8 yards.

Megistos - 2

Robertson 46' Robertson got the ball nicely, 1v1 with Bolkvadze, Bolkvadze slid down but Robertson megged him and put the ball in the back of the net.
Robertson 54' Lam won a free-kick at the edge of the D, Robertson took the curler and it hit the inside of the post and went in in the top left corner of the net.

The Gothanita Isles - 2

McCrory 27' McCrory received the ball on the left side of the box, she faked shotted Fran who dived to 'block 'the shot' going at goal' and tapped it in over Becks
Kartal 82' Kartal took a out-of the box shot which went on the ground zooming past Becks diving hands into the top right corner.

[Electrum]

The Turnip: Sylestone athletes caught getting high in Ethane (GONE WILD)
by Sweet-T, citizen journalist

It was the shockiest of shock announcements ever made -- the Ethanians and the Sylestoneans had won the rights to host the Cup of Harmony, but then subsequently decided to not play their own matches in their respective countries, a real power move if there ever were one. It's kind of like the power move when you are sitting in a public bathroom and someone knocks on the door and you say "COME IN" and they walk in and you stare at them in the eyes as you squeeze out a plop.

We've understood why the Ethanians and the Sylestoneans decided to go through this unusual arrangements -- it was all a plan for the Sylestonean athletes to get high on ethane, a controlled substance in Sylestone. Normally, gas-fitted appliances such as Stove, a Sylestonean midfielder, would consume a healthy diet of 99.95% methane in their day-to-day diet of natural gas. However, in Ethane, they like to mix things up by having a natural gas source of 99.95% ethane instead, for obvious reasons (if it wasn't obvious enough, it's because it's their country name and it is customary to love ethane as the best short-chain alkane -- it is socially taboo to proclaim love for propane).

We have received secret footage of the Sylestonean team huffing ethane from a gas intake pipe just outside King Edward IV Stadium. Stove got so high on the stuff that it said that it had mysterious sexual powers that a certain pair of nude princesses would value very much, and it made such a large racket in opening and closing its oven doors. Fridge got so high that instead of capturing balls in its innards (like it usually does in its football matches), it was "tripping balls" by literally tripping on all the soccer balls that had accumulated after their 1-0 victory against Tagria Tagria.

Of course, we don't want to release this video to the public because we don't want to scar you with a seventy-eight minute video of appliances and household products getting frekay. You're just going to have to take our word for it.

[Mavinet]

MAVINET PLAYED GAMES OF (UN)LUCKY DRAW IN SYLESTONE
by Pham Ngoc Le

Luck came and went in the latest two matches of Mavinet against Sarzonia and Yuezhou, played on The Bay Reserve stadium in Sylestone. Coming into the third match against the former champions Sarzonia with the top spot to lose, the Water Buffaloes showed that they have come a long way from the humble beginning in the Baptism of Fire 72. Head Coach Nguyen Minh Quan expressed his cautious confidence before the match, saying that the team “are capable of rising to the challenge of containing the threats from Sarzonia”. What happened in the ensuing 90 minutes proved his beliefs.

Unlike the two previous teams Mavinet faced, Sarzonia approached the match with a more balanced approach. Possession was kept fairly comfortably by the four Sarzonian midfielders, while Cayden Aguirre and Jake Campos presented constant threats to the Mavinese defense. With 7 players pressing up against 5 primary defensive players on Mavinet’s side, the Stars created many chances throughout the first half. A fluid 31st minute link-up between Brady Reynolds, Jake Campos and Cayden Aguirre put Aguirre in a comfortable position to tap in while the Mavinese defense was still confused about why the linesman did not call for offside. Replays show a slightly out of position Le Luong Minh barely put Aguirre onside, but on a different day, things could’ve gone a different way. Nevertheless, Mavinet was 1-0 down against the strongest team of the group.

It was a difficult but not hopeless for Mavinet. The second half brought a slight change in personnel and tactic as Hoang Phuc Nguyen came in to replace a struggling Ho Vu Thanh Hoang. Mavinet switched to a more traditional 4-4-2 with Hoang Phuc Nguyen and Lam Tri Thong provided more coverage at the back. Sarzonia continued to press for a second goal, but found the space for them to operate in got restricted a lot more by the more mobile Hoang Phuc Nguyen in midfield. Mavinet regained more time on possession and directed more threats toward Carlton Sandt. Finally in the 77th minute, Tran Hoang Minh successfully exploited the space allowed by the Sarzonia center backs and fired a powerful shot from the edge of the box that flew just out of the reach of the goalkeeper. A lucky goal perhaps, but nonetheless it was one that came from Mavinet not backing down and took the chance when it mattered most. With that effort, the Water Buffaloes managed to keep a point against a much stronger team.

If luck favored Mavinet in the first match, it sure forced us to return it in the following encounter with Yuezhou. A classic 8-goal thriller could have ended with Mavinese fans singing in jubilant, but instead twisted right at the end to make every Mavinet’s fan putting their hands on their heads in disappointment.

Mavinet opened the match on the right foot, scoring an early goal in the 4th minute through a solo effort of Vo Thanh Hai through the lines of Yuezhou’s players. Despite having the numerical advantage, Yuezhou defenders were hesitant to go for the ball in Thanh Hai’s feet, only to realize how big a mistake that was. Given enough room to maneuver, Vo Thanh Hai even managed to fool Guo Xiawei before blasting the ball into the roof of the goal. A fantastic start for Mavinet.

Yuezhou continued to struggle against Mavinet’s aggressive approach to the match afterward. In the 24th minute, Ruo Xiaolan, under pressure to pass up quickly with Vo Thanh Hai pressing in, made a underpowered pass to Ren Fang which was immediately intercepted by Vu Tien Linh. The left winger made the most out of the gift and fired a shot pass the goalkeeper, who expressed frustration at the costly mistake.

However, things started to slow down for Mavinet after Tran Hoang Minh was switched out due to an unfortunate collision with captain Nguyen Quang Khai while trying to get the ball in the air. Losing the best creative outlet, Mavinet couldn’t stage as effective attacks as they did with the substitute Nguyen Hoai Trung Dung, who is more of a traditional central midfielder than an attacking one. Most of the attacks were blocked by a disciplined Yuezhou defense, and the Red Dragons even made a few attempts at Mavinet’s goal with their counter attacks. One such situation led to a goal when Huang Shedong scored from close range in the 39th minute. The first half ended 2-1 for Mavinet.

People expected Mavinet to start the second half strongly as they did in the first half, but it was Yuezhou that managed to do that. The break seemed to bring back determination and a change of pace to the Red Dragons. They hit Mavinet right from the start with fast-pace pressing and attacks, the type of play that Mavinet have been struggling to effective deal with since the early days. Once again, the Huang Shedong – Liu Huiying duo caused much trouble for the Mavinese defense. Huang Shedong would go on to return the favor to the frontline partner and set Liu Huiying up for an easy header into goal in the 50th minute. The game was back to square one.

Or so we thought. The score was balanced but the momentum seemed to have changed direction to Yuezhou’s advantage. Only 6 minutes after the equalizer, Chen Xiwei scored another goal to get Yuezhou the lead from a corner. The Mavinese defense left the scorer unmarked in the box and realized too late to save the situation. Head Coach Minh Quan’s squad needed a boost to avoid an embarrassing loss to the newcomers. Lucky for them, Mavinet’s defense was not the only one plagued with errors that day. Han Jian, in an attempt to head the ball back toward Mavinet’s half from Nguyen Hoang Trung’s long pass up field, mistimed the header and let the ball bounce toward Ruo Xiaolan while Vo Thanh Hai quickly rushed pass him for a clear run on goal. Thanh Hai made no mistake and punished Yuezhou again to equalize for Mavinet. The game was the show that kept on giving, albeit not in the way Mavinese fans would have preferred. Nonetheless, it’s anyone’s game once more.

Mavinese fans were ready to celebrate, however, when Lam Tri Thong scored our fourth goal from a long shot. It was an unexpected goal that came at a stage where Mavinet finally regained some ground but weren’t entirely controlling. It was the 74th minute and time was running out, so the late lead would have given Mavinet that mental advantage to finish the match with all 3 points. Yet it was the desire to put the match beyond all doubts that backfired and costed the Water Buffaloes the victory. In the dying minutes of the match, Mavinet’s players were pushing high for another goal when they should have stayed low and compact. A corner in the 87th minute was defended successfully by Yuezhou, who then launched a fast counter attack that caught Mavinet’s back line off guard. The ball was passed up quickly to a fresh Wen Xiaohui, who raced toward the byline before putting a cross in for Huang Shedong to finish calmly into the back of the net. As the Yuezhou players wheeled away in celebration, Mavinet’s players were visibly frustrated. It was a costly mistake, not just at the individual level, but at the tactical level as well. Head Coach Minh Quan and his players will have a lot to reflect on after this match.

With the two draws, Mavinet lost the top spot to Sarzonia, who in the second match edged out their encounter with Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom. The Water Buffaloes currently sit in second with 8 points, only 2 points above the third place and 5 above the non-qualifying fifth place. With a bye in the next set of match, Mavinet will need to be extremely careful to not get a bad result against TJUN-ia if we want to avoid a quick slide down the table. Suddenly the odds aren’t looking so bright anymore, but Mavinet are still in a good position to finish the group stage in the top 4.

Let us rise up to the challenges!

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MD3

SARZONIA - 1
31' Cayden Aguirre

MAVINET - 1
77' Tran Hoang Minh

MD4

MAVINET - 4
4' Vo Thanh Hai
24' Vu Tien Linh
64' Vo Thanh Hai
74' Lam Tri Thong

Tran Hoang Minh injured - unavailable for next match

YUEZHOU - 4
39' Huang Shedong
50' Liu Huiying
56' Chen Xiwei
87' Huang Shedong

[Tequilo]

TAPALUPÉ, Tequilo - So many match days, so little time… don’t worry, when you don’t have time for the big read (and we don’t have time for the big write) let the GOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-a!!! Daily take the strain - all your favourite bits, in brief. Today we’re bringing back some of your favourite features: Track & Trace… whatever happened to Xaïr Iscla? El Copametro… how are Los Pitxileros making out in Sylestone, land of pointy-eared savages and - allegedly - talking tea-cups? Rúi de Las Rovas… season two of the famous old comic book strip rebooted… no, wait, we don’t have that today: cut-offs and whatnot; Rúi’ll be back next time. But first, we have mail! And you can write in too, if you want to - address your fascinating texts to spamcatcher@gola.teq or drop a letter in the mail to PO Box 654353583.2, Grand Central Post Office, Tapalupé¹

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LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
The things that are really shaking your soda right now

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Good morning everyone! Remember that letter we got from the Vdaran national team manager, Lükækš (“your habit of winning”, Letters To The Editor, Thursday)? Of course you do! I’d even go so far as to guess you are cross about it, judging by the stack of replies we got in our mail bag about it. Here are just a few samples, beginning with Furioso de Tacranza who doesn’t wish to speak for everyone when he shouts: “I don’t wish to speak for everyone but I am FURIOUS about the hex letter from that LV. Clearly intended to put us off qualifying for the World Cup, I just want to say, we will not be held to ransom by this buccaneer and you won’t stop us from qualifying for the World Cup with your superstitious words. We, the nation of Tequilo, reject your palabra and curse you back!”

Perhaps you missed something there, Furioso, but Melia Horcontas of Florenio may be able to help: “Bastardo de Vdara! Can it be any coincidence that LV writes in about us winning and qualifying, and the very next game we lose, and get eliminated? And him a manager too! I call foul on this one, Señor Editor.” Naturally, if there is a conspiracy to be had, some will match that conspiracy, and raise it. Someone like, perhaps, ‘Orejas Grandes’, one of our regular correspondents, who notes: “Have you seen the stories from Vdara in the Cup of Harmony forums? They sound like pirate Bonesmen in disguise. Is this the much anticipated return of our naughty nautical friends from Bonesea? It would be typical of them to throw a palabra at us just for fun!”

Nobody with half a critical brain cell will take that sort of thinking seriously, (except perhaps the President of our barbarian neighbours in Usorno, Señor Viento), but we suspect that won’t stop it from gaining traction in the letters column at least. Healthy rebuttals are more than welcome.

Good news! Norm. de Plume of Plume, Antivador writes again: “I decided to take your advice (“Let’s all check on García de Corcoles”, Thursday’s letters) and go and check on the man on the beach. He was perfectly fine, rather startled by my tap on the shoulder, and swore blind his name was not García. Apparently he was in the middle of contemplation when I disturbed him. I think you should advise your readers not to disturb the man on the beach in Antivador who looks half-drowned. He could get tremendously irritable.”

Thank you Norm, we advise readers accordingly. Great community activism there but it seems our search for the missing goalkeeper goes on. If anyone thinks they have seen García de Corcoles alive we would love to hear the details, please drop us a line on this or any other matter at Letters To The Editor, spamcatcher@gola.teq or slowmail to PO Box 654353583.2, Grand Central Post Office, Tapalupé¹.

DOUBLE DELIGHT MARRED BY DOUBLE INJURY DISRUPTION

In another testing double header Los Pitxileros will be happy to have come away with a maximum haul of six points to hit coach Isaac Martí’s points target with two games to spare. Qualification itself has not been secured yet but keeping a clear head and remaining focused should see Tequilo through to the knockout stages. Starting with a barnstormer against Pluvia & The Saxean Isles, it was attacking midfielder Niño Pinto, in for rested captain Mateo Tafalla, who drew the eye with a player of the match performance, two goals including a penalty, and assist on the late winner from veteran striker Urlegi Gorostola. Things could not have got off to a worse start for Tequilo with Kier Kilbride dinking home Niko Gardner’s cross inside sixty seconds to put everyone on the back foot. But the response was impressive, driven by Pinto and his midfield partner Ixtub Tün, who won the penalty only a few minutes later to get things back on an even keel. A back and forth battle was under way, with Niño getting Tequilo back in front midway through the first half, but Gardner scoring to level things off ten minutes later. Goals were harder to come by in the second half but the game was no less entertaining, both sides creating some good chances to win it. In the end it was the experienced head of Gorostola, 35, who settled it with a neat take in the last remaining minutes to secure the win for Tequilo.

A potentially tricky tie with Delaclava, giants of a distant past, was up next and proved equally tight, though far less entertaining for the neutral as both sides adopted a more cautious approach. With chances few and far between, the game was settled by captain Mateo Tafalla’s fine effort from outside the box, but the win was overshadowed by the loss of both first choice strikers, Tlacolotl and Ecuador, to injuries. Coach Martí hopes to have Ecuador back for the final group game against Græntfjall, but there is no word yet on national top scorer Tlacolotl, who’s absence was clearly missed even in this game as the chances dried up.

---

TEQUILO 3-2 Pluvia & The Saxean Isles HT: 2-2

Location: Sentient Oval, Kirkham
Attendance: 29,275 noisy toilet seats and the Ultra-Mariachis (8 sombreros+dog; all standing up)
Scorers: Niño Pinto 7’ (pen) 21’ Urlegi Gorostola 81’ | Kier Kilbride 1’ Niko Gardner 30’
Booked: Ixtub Tün, Chicchan, Esä Neá
Tequilo Line-Up: Oscar Bienvenida | Llösë Lea, Haize Apeiztegui (Capitan), Noxochinoch, Chicchan | Ixtub Tün | Esâ Neá (sub: Isidoro Artechevarria), Niño Pinto, Leyton | Tlacolotl, Urlegi Gorostola (VC)
Player of the Match: Niño Pinto (Tequilo)

Delaclava 0-1 TEQUILO HT: 0-0

Location: Sentient Oval, Kirkham
Attendance: 29,275 noisy toilet seats and the Ultra-Mariachis (8 sombreros+dog; all standing up)
Scorers: Mateo Tafalla 54’
Booked: Delaclavs #1, #2, #4, #9, #sub3 | Bienvenida, Vilca Hualla
Tequilo Line-Up: Oscar Bienvenida | Patrick Zambo (sub: Llösë Lea), Haize Apeiztegui, Huracan, Huachalla | Ixtub Tün | Vilca Hualla (VC), Mateo Tafalla (Capitan), Leyton | Tlacolotl (sub: Urlegi Gorostola), Ecuador (sub: Roxelio Toran)
Player of the Match: Patrick Zambo (Tequilo)

NEXT UP

Tequilo stat fans will be looking at a couple of interesting records as the Agave-Blues come into their final two matches in fine form and close to qualification, which might even be achieved without picking up another point. Coach Isaac Martí will want somewhere closer to six though, as he insists the team maintain momentum and of course push for the most favourable draw in the first knockout round. Avoiding a loss in both games will also extend Los Pitxileros proud record of remaining unbeaten in tournament group matches, a run which would extend to 20 ties over four competitions since Tequilo engaged in international football. But that is far from guaranteed against two sides in good form, notably the reigning Baptism of Fire champions who have quickly established themselves as an emerging challenger in world football. Are Græntfjall the new Polar Islandstates? Are they actually Polar Islandstates in disguise (that’s happened before)? Tequilo, having raised just one or two eyebrows themselves as a new entrant in world football but thusfar having failed to win any significant commendations (or any silverware whatsoever) will want to bloody the nose of a potential future giant before they get to big to lay a glove on…

Young goalkeeper Oscar Bienvenida will equal veteran defender Haize Apeiztegui’s national record of 23 consecutive games for the country when he turns out in the Bloumany tie, whilst hoping to win the record outright if he gets selection for following game as seems probable. Coach Martí will be missing Patrick Zambo through injury for the first game but is likely to rest him for both ties with one eye on the next round; Llösë Lea expected to start in his place, all being well. First choice strikers Tlacolotl and Ecuador are also both crocked going into these games, though Ecuador should return for the Græntfjall final match of the group stage - coach Martí will go with Ecuador’s impressive IAC strike partner Ito and reliable backup Urlegi Gorostola will also feature. It is a big moment for Florentino centre half Antton Machinena, who after knocking on the door for quite some time will finally win his first cap for the Agave-Blues in the upcoming Blouman Empire match, and is likely to play the following game in the double-header as Tequilo look to confirm passage into the knockout rounds.

Confirmed Line-Up for TEQUILO vs. Blouman Empire: Oscar Bienvenida | Llösë Lea, Haize Apeiztegui, Antton Machinena, Huachalla | Ixtub Tün | Vilca Hualla (VC), Mateo Tafalla (Capitan), Leyton | Urlegi Gorostola, Ito

Probable Line-Up for Græntfjall vs. TEQUILO: Oscar Bienvenida | Llösë Lea, Haize Apeiztegui, Antton Machinena, Chicchan | Ixtub Tün | Isidoro Artechevarria, Mateo Tafalla (Capitan), Leyton | Ito, Ecuador

Venue: Sentient Oval, Kirkham

---

TRACE AND TRACK
Whatever happened to Xaïr Iscla?

---

Not long ago, two and a bit years by the Teq calendar in fact, a terrible, terrible thing happened at the under-18 World Championship. It was a competition that had just dropped it’s long term title, the Sporting World Cup, and as it turns out that was somewhat prescient. Imagine a team of innocent youngsters, not long in this world, from a nation not long in this world either, certainly in footballing terms - it was their first ever tournament. And yes, of course, we are talking about Tequilo. They have started well, two wins, when they come up against a nation that have been around a long time, who’s kids are drilled by experienced professionals. From a nation quite well respected in the sporting world for a long list of sporting achievements, and yet until recently an international political pariah for their extremist misandrous regime. What could possibly go wrong? After four minutes, one young Tequiloan starlet, gaining some rave reviews from his first couple of games, goes in with a crunching tackle from behind, fells a player from the famous team, who lands and rolls around before going still. The Tequiloan boy is immediately sent off and storms to the changing room, while treatment continues on the Cassadaiguan injury. Oops, did I say Cassadaiguan? I meant, anonymous person of [country name omitted to preserve international relations]. Eventually, the injured player is removed. Slow motion replays tell a story - there was no contact. The Tequiloan boy, Xaïr Iscla, slid right past the young woman, who flung herself to the ground like a shot swan to get herself a free kick, and was so convincing in her dive, she hit her head on the turf as she went down, and knocked herself unconscious. In the aftermath of the game, the red card was revoked and a yellow card issued to the injured diver. But almost no-one noticed that, as a storm of hate enveloped poor Xaïr from a nation famed for it’s prejudice. From the highest authority down to the lowest common denominator, everyone had a hateful opinion of the boy from Tequilo, and wasn’t afraid to voice it. Anti-social media was aflame with the old misandry of a nation still stuck in it’s prejudicial ways. Baseless allegations were made. Threats of litigation flung out, laughable really. Further forensic video footage showed Xaïr Iscla abused by various players of the opposition in the tunnel before the match, and several names were called out to him before the infamous incident. He lost his temper, yes. He should have spoken to the referee instead of take matters into his own hands, yes. It was lucky he missed his intended target with such a wayward tackle, yes. And it was a bitter sort of karma that knocked out the hate-fuelled cheat, yes.

So, what happened next for that young prodigy, Xaïr Iscla? Because he hasn’t been seen near a national team squad since, despite lots of talk about a new star on the block. Did he suddenly lose his mojo, disillusioned by the avalanche of hate mail and death threats he got from crazed fundamentalists of a foreign nation? Did he go into hiding, or retire, or develop a substance misuse problem to calm the nerves? None of the above. He’s fine, don’t panic. It’s just that his team have hit a brick wall - Peru Urzagui finished this last season with their worst performance in the state championship for more than a decade. The manager was fired. Xaïr, still only 19, was a fighting a lost cause, though he was the team’s player of the season. He had his best personal stats since breaking into the first team. He is still going to be a star. He doesn’t talk much about what happened, and if you ask he’ll just shrug. “Haters gonna hate” he said in one interview. Did he ever get any litigation paperwork, as widely threatened by the authorities, the coaches and the family of the self-injured party? “Nothing, of course,” he says, “it was all for show. Embarrassing really. The sort of thing Presidente Viento would do - double down, and double down again. Paletos!,” he laughs.

---

1Or TG Tequilo - really, do! We guarantee to read every letter, and print or paraphrase or misquote each of them.

[Sylestone]

You may have had a shocker start, but don't dream it's over just yet. A couple of good results could put you into the top four. Cutoff for groups A-D, Matchdays 5&6!

Group A

Group A
Tequilo 1–0 Blouman Empire
Ethane 3–1 Delaclava
Mercedini 4–0 Pluvia and the Saxean Isles

Group A                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Tequilo                          5   4  1  0    8   4  +4   13
2 Mercedini                        4   2  2  0    8   3  +5    8
3 Graintfjall                      4   2  1  1    6   6   0    7
4 Ethane                           4   2  0  2    7   4  +3    6
5 Blouman Empire                   4   1  2  1    6   5  +1    5
6 Delaclava                        4   0  1  3    2   6  −4    1
7 Pluvia and the Saxean Isles      5   0  1  4    5  14  −9    1

Group A
Delaclava 2–3 Mercedini
Blouman Empire 1–1 Ethane
Graintfjall 1–0 Tequilo

Group A                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Tequilo                          6   4  1  1    8   5  +3   13
2 Mercedini                        5   3  2  0   11   5  +6   11
3 Graintfjall                      5   3  1  1    7   6  +1   10
4 Ethane                           5   2  1  2    8   5  +3    7
5 Blouman Empire                   5   1  3  1    7   6  +1    6
6 Delaclava                        5   0  1  4    4   9  −5    1
7 Pluvia and the Saxean Isles      5   0  1  4    5  14  −9    1

Group B

Group B
Cheergirls 2–1 Geektopia
Orion Islands 1–2 Squidroidia
New Lusitania 1–1 Valladares

Group B              Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 New Lusitania          4   3  1  0   10   3  +7   10
2 Valladares             5   3  1  1    6   4  +2   10
3 Cheergirls             5   3  0  2    4   5  −1    9
4 Squidroidia            4   3  0  1    7   5  +2    9
5 Kohnhead               4   1  1  2    8   9  −1    4
6 Geektopia              4   0  1  3    7  10  −3    1
7 Orion Islands          4   0  0  4    3   9  −6    0

Group B
Squidroidia 2–3 New Lusitania
Geektopia 3–0 Orion Islands
Kohnhead 2–0 Cheergirls

Group B              Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 New Lusitania          5   4  1  0   13   5  +8   13
2 Valladares             5   3  1  1    6   4  +2   10
3 Cheergirls             6   3  0  3    4   7  −3    9
4 Squidroidia            5   3  0  2    9   8  +1    9
5 Kohnhead               5   2  1  2   10   9  +1    7
6 Geektopia              5   1  1  3   10  10   0    4
7 Orion Islands          5   0  0  5    3  12  −9    0

Group C

Group C
The Gothanita Isles 2–3 Sargossa
Mattijana 2–1 Megistos
Flavovespia 3–2 Abanhfleft

Group C                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Flavovespia              4   3  1  0    7   2  +5   10
2 Abanhfleft               5   3  1  1   11   8  +3   10
3 Sargossa                 4   3  1  0    9   6  +3   10
4 Mattijana                4   2  0  2    5   4  +1    6
5 Megistos                 4   1  1  2    6   7  −1    4
6 The Gothanita Isles      5   0  2  3    6  11  −5    2
7 Huayramarca              4   0  0  4    2   8  −6    0

Group C
Megistos 0–2 Flavovespia
Sargossa 5–3 Mattijana
Huayramarca 1–1 The Gothanita Isles

Group C                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Flavovespia              5   4  1  0    9   2  +7   13
2 Sargossa                 5   4  1  0   14   9  +5   13
3 Abanhfleft               5   3  1  1   11   8  +3   10
4 Mattijana                5   2  0  3    8   9  −1    6
5 Megistos                 5   1  1  3    6   9  −3    4
6 The Gothanita Isles      6   0  3  3    7  12  −5    3
7 Huayramarca              5   0  1  4    3   9  −6    1

Group D

Group D
Sarzonia 4–3 Barunia
Yuezhou 0–2 Zeta Reka and Hugeltadom
TJUN-ia 0–1 Mavinet

Group D                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Sarzonia                      5   4  1  0    9   4  +5   13
2 Mavinet                       5   3  2  0   11   5  +6   11
3 Zeta Reka and Hugeltadom      4   3  0  1    6   1  +5    9
4 TJUN-ia                       4   1  1  2    2   4  −2    4
5 Barunia                       4   1  0  3    6  11  −5    3
6 Yuezhou                       4   0  2  2    5   8  −3    2
7 Rangers FC                    4   0  0  4    2   8  −6    0

Group D
Zeta Reka and Hugeltadom 3–7 TJUN-ia
Barunia 4–3 Yuezhou
Rangers FC 1–4 Sarzonia

Group D                     Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Sarzonia                      6   5  1  0   13   5  +8   16
2 Mavinet                       5   3  2  0   11   5  +6   11
3 Zeta Reka and Hugeltadom      5   3  0  2    9   8  +1    9
4 TJUN-ia                       5   2  1  2    9   7  +2    7
5 Barunia                       5   2  0  3   10  14  −4    6
6 Yuezhou                       5   0  2  3    8  12  −4    2
7 Rangers FC                    5   0  0  5    3  12  −9    0

Please note that Head-to-head hasn't been taken into account

[Oberour Ar Moro]

Practice ended for Oberour Ar Moro’s bye week, and Iudicael Breut was was feeling bitter.

Matthieu Augier was still riding him, which seemed ridiculous since Augier was also swearing up and down that Breut wasn’t going to see the field. And so far Augier had lived up to his word, Breut had yet to see any minutes during this Cup of Harmony.

Breut was more discouraged and playing in Ethane than he had been in Oberour Ar Moro. He marched forward, eyes on the ground from the locker room to the bus that was going to take them back to their hotel before...

“Iudicael!”

What now? It was a man a few years older than him, what appeared to be a permanent stubble. He looked familiar in a way Iudicael couldn’t place. The man stared at him with an unblinking look Iudacael couldn’t quite identify.

Not just a gawking fan, but some creepy guy older than him. Grand.

They stared at each other, before Iduicael broke the silence with a sharp “What?”

The man almost jumped back with a start. “Oh, um...I’m a...fan.”

Out of the corner of Iudicael’s eye he saw a man in all white conspicuously trying to look inconspicuous behind some cars. Iudicael wasn’t feeling any part of this interaction and wanted it over. “Great.” He started walking again. The man almost leapt in front of him.

“I mean-I’m from Almanarre. I am a friend of your father.”

Iudicael was even less impressed than before. “So are you as big a piece of garbage as he was?”

The man reeled back, obviously hurt. Good. Iudicael tried to brush past the man, really trying to put his shoulder into him when the man grabbed his arm.

“He was a good man!” he protested but a lot of things started happening at once. Iudicael had grabbed him, and several of Iudicael’s teammates who were also walking to the bus had grabbed the both of them to separate them. Iudicael was shuffled to the bus as an angry Matthieu Augier had started to berate him. He didn’t see where the man was shuffled off to.

---

“Fine work. Excellent job.” Steve snarked at Breval as the two escaped the planet. “A great start.”

“Shut up!” a wounded Breval snapped back at the angel. His son hated him. A piece of garbage? He probably shouldn’t have been surprised, but still. He hadn’t come in with any sort of plan, but he’d have to do something else to help his son.

No idea what though.

[Ethane]

Today, some of you may have qualified for the Cup of Harmony already. Some of you may have not yet. You've got one more game to prove yourselves; one more game to win. It's going to go down to the wire for some of you. If you wouldn't mind though, please don't knock out Ethane; The Kids Don't Wanna Come Home yet. Cutoff for MD5-6, Groups E-H.

---

Group E

Tikariot 1–1 The Jovannic
Twicetagria 1–4 Xanneria
Murphtannia 0–2 Sylestone

Group E                  Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Xanneria                 4   4  0  0   14   7  +7   12
2 Sylestone                5   3  1  1    8   6  +2   10
3 Krytenia                 4   2  0  2   12   8  +4    6
4 Tikariot                 5   1  2  2    9   8  +1    5
5 Twicegratia              4   1  1  2    7  10  −3    4
6 Murphtannia              4   1  1  2    4   8  −4    4
7 The Jovannic             4   0  1  3    6  13  −7    1

Xanneria 2–1 Murphtannia
The Jovannic 1–1 Twicegratia
Krytenia 1–2 Tikariot

Group E                  Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Xanneria                 5   5  0  0   16   8  +8   15   Has won the group.
2 Sylestone                5   3  1  1    8   6  +2   10   Guaranteed qualification.
3 Tikariot                 6   2  2  2   11   9  +2    8
4 Krytenia                 5   2  0  3   13  10  +3    6
5 Twicetagria              5   1  2  2    8  11  −3    5
6 Murphtannia              5   1  1  3    5  10  −5    4
7 The Jovannic             5   0  2  3    7  14  −7    2   Eliminated.

Group F

Electrum 3–0 Ziwana
Sulsuland 1–5 HUElavia
Astograth 1–0 South Newlandia

Group F                  Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Astograth                4   4  0  0    7   0  +7   12
2 HUElavia                 4   2  1  1   10   5  +5    7
3 Electrum                 5   2  1  2    6   5  +1    7
4 South Newlandia          5   2  0  3    3   4  −1    6
5 Indusse                  4   2  0  2    6   9  −3    6
6 Sulsuland                4   1  1  2    3   7  −4    4
7 Ziwana                   4   0  1  3    3   8  −5    1

HUElavia 2–0 Astograth
Ziwana 1–1 Sulsuland
Indusse 2–3 Electrum

Group F                  Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Astograth                5   4  0  1    7   2  +5   12   Guaranteed qualification.
2 HUElavia                 5   3  1  1   12   5  +7   10   Guaranteed qualification.
3 Electrum                 6   3  1  2    9   7  +2   10   Guaranteed qualification.
4 South Newlandia          5   2  0  3    3   4  −1    6
5 Indusse                  5   2  0  3    8  12  −4    6
6 Sulsuland                5   1  2  2    4   8  −4    5
7 Ziwana                   5   0  2  3    4   9  −5    2   Eliminated.

Group G

Poafmersia 2–2 Southwest Eastnorth
Riena 1–2 Maccian
Vdara 0–1 Saltstead

Group G                  Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Poafmersia               5   2  2  1    6   5  +1    8
2 Vdara                    4   2  1  1    9   4  +5    7
3 Tioguldós                4   2  1  1   10  10   0    7
4 Maccian                  4   2  1  1    7   7   0    7
5 Saltstead                5   1  2  2    3   5  −2    5
6 Riena                    4   1  1  2    4   4   0    4
7 Southwest Eastnorth      4   0  2  2    5   9  −4    2

Maccian 2–1 Vdara
Southwest Eastnorth 3–2 Riena
Tioguldós 4–3 Poafmersia

Group G                  Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Tioguldós                5   3  1  1   14  13  +1   10   Guaranteed qualification.
2 Maccian                  5   3  1  1    9   8  +1   10   Guaranteed qualification.
3 Poafmersia               6   2  2  2    9   9   0    8
4 Vdara                    5   2  1  2   10   6  +4    7
5 Saltstead                5   1  2  2    3   5  −2    5
6 Southwest Eastnorth      5   1  2  2    8  11  −3    5
7 Riena                    5   1  1  3    6   7  −1    4

Group H

Springmont 1–3 Oberour Ar Moro
Northwest Kalactin 2–1 Jeruselem
Taeshan 1–1 Savigliane

Group H                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Northwest Kalactin       4   4  0  0   12   4  +8   12
2 Omerica                  4   2  1  1   13   8  +5    7
3 Oberour Ar Moro          4   2  1  1   13  11  +2    7
4 Savigliane               5   1  2  2   10  13  −3    5
5 Jeruselem                4   1  1  2    9  12  −3    4
6 Taeshan                  4   0  3  1    3   4  −1    3
7 Springmont               5   0  2  3    5  13  −8    2

Jeruselem 0–0 Taeshan
Oberour Ar Moro 1–3 Northwest Kalactin
Omerica 2–1 Springmont

Group H                  Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Northwest Kalactin       5   5  0  0   15   5 +10   15   Has won the group.
2 Omerica                  5   3  1  1   15   9  +6   10   Guaranteed qualification.
3 Oberour Ar Moro          5   2  1  2   14  14   0    7
4 Savigliane               5   1  2  2   10  13  −3    5
5 Jeruselem                5   1  2  2    9  12  −3    5
6 Taeshan                  5   0  4  1    3   4  −1    4
7 Springmont               6   0  2  4    6  15  −9    2   Eliminated.

[Jeruselem]

Princess Katherine Annabelle Dallas with fox ears, a fox coat and a tail for Naked News Jeruselem in Ethane

Hello, this is Princess Katherine Annabelle Dallas or just Princess Kate for Naked News Jeruselem. Kate San if you're Japanese.
It's match day 5 and 6 here at the Cup of Harmony 78, and well we needed to do good, I mean very good!
How did well actually do?

Yeah, not very well.

Match day 5
Omerica had the bye.
Springmont who were last lost to Oberour Ar Moro 3-1. I guess that was an expected win for Oberour Ar Moro.
Taeshan drew 1–1 with Savigliane. Yes another draw for the top seed and it's really dire for Taeshan.

So we were the lucky ones to play group leaders Northwest Kalactin!
Unfortunately we came up short managing to lose 2-1.
Admittedly they were the better team having three wins in a row, and we had one win.
But the game was actually close and they had to put an effort in to beat us.
Yeah but it's still as loss for us and given how open our group is, a win for us could have done great things.
But guess what, we didn't and got nothing from the game except a worse goal difference.

Moving to match day 6
Savigliane had the bye.
Oberour Ar Moro faced off with leaders Northwest Kalactin, and couldn't win either.
Northwest Kalactin won 3-1 to extend their winning streak to 5.
Oberour Ar Moro is a top 3 contender and this loss set them back really badly.
Omerica beat last placed Springmont 2-1.

But hey we met Taeshan, who haven't won a game so far.
Taeshan have had all draws except the loss to Northwest Kalactin.
Guess the result?
Yeah another draw 0-0.
Ok we didn't lose but really ... this one game was our chance to win as Taeshan seem incapacable of winning games this cup.
1 point from 2 games, it's not what we needed. Pretty much a disaster really.

Northwest Kalactin have won the group on 15 points.
Omerica are 2nd and have qualified on 10 points.
Springmont are eliminated with 2 points, they are last.
Which leaves Oberour Ar Moro on 7 in 3rd spot, Savigliane is 4th on 5 points - and we are also on 5 point in 5th. Taeshan are 6th in 4 points.

Match day 7 - Springmont have the bye.
So it is Northwest Kalactin vs Omerica, Taeshan vs Oberour Ar Moro, Savigliane vs Jeruselem.

Northwest Kalactin vs Omerica - this game has no effect on the battle for 3rd and 4th spot at all.
If Omerica lose, they could drop back to 3rd in the condition Oberour Ar Moro wins it's game by a ... very large margin.
Otherwise the result is this game is inconsequential really.

Taeshan vs Oberour Ar Moro
Taeshan need to win this, a draw for them is useless. Taeshan can qualify BUT they need a draw in the Savigliane vs Jeruselem game and they must win.
Oberour Ar Moro win, they keep 3rd spot and qualify. In theory, they finish with 10 points and could take 2nd spot but their goal difference says no to that.
However, if they draw - like everyone else does with Taeshan then they finish on 8 points which I think puts them 3rd or 4th depending on the other games. Either way, they qualify.

Savigliane vs Jeruselem
Savigliane are ahead of us on the table.
We lose, we're out! Savigliane will make the top 4 with 8 points.
We win, we make the top 4 with 8 points.
If this game is a draw, then it pretty much we're eliminated as well.

SO! It's really simple, WE HAVE TO WIN. THAT'S IT.

It's come down to this.
You know that 5-1 loss to Omerica, well .. it's badly affected our goal difference and pushed us down to 5th when we could have been 4th if the loss wasn't so bad.
Only if we converted one of draws into a win but it didn't happen.

We've made a complete hash of this so far but we can qualify, just.
Like last time.

Northwest Kalactin, Omerica have qualified. We have four teams left to fight it out for the last two spots. Hopefully one of those is ours.

In Group G, Tioguldós and Maccian have qualified. It is open for the 5 other teams to take the last two spots.
In Group F, Astograth, HUElavia and Electrum have locked up the 3 positions. The last spot will be fought over by three teams.
In Group E, Xanneria has won the group. Co-host Sylestone has qualifed. The other two spots are on contention with Tikariot in 3rd spot looking the most secure.
The other co-host Ethane is in Group A and well currently in 4th. While the teams above them have qualified, they could be kicked out by Blouman Empire.

It's GO HARD OR GO HOME for a lot of teams here.
Yes, as usual we're in that situation.
Going home is not the option we would select.

That's it from, one more day. The fateful one.

[Vdara]

Giving Up

Cap’n Peg-Leg: ”Yarrr, I can’t be arsed with this shite anymore. Scuttle the ship, ya scallywags. This be a shit tournament for us, and we just need tae be waitin’ for th’ next World Cup. Tally Ho, Cup of Harmony!”

At that point, the S.S. Doom N’ Gloom went out to sea, never to be seen again. It would be sunk, and nobody would ever grace their eyes on the beauty that was the ship.
Godspeed, Doom N’ Gloom. Godspeed.

[Squidroidia]

Yes, once again (Like the time I used Lit for a WCQ86 RP) I am basing this RP on a song, to be more precise this one.

---

It's do or die against Valladares for the Inklings, they know they have to win to advance to the knockout stages! They cannot settle for a loss!

Caught in the moment, not even thinkin' twice
Everything's frozen, nothing but you and I
Can't stop my heart from beating, why do I love this feeling?

Squidroidian goalie Go Kyushichi was frozen in place in the locker room as the rest of his team got out for Squidroidia's final Cup of Harmony group stage game against Valladares. Really, he was frozen after the New Lusitania game. This was potentially the final game he was going to have as a professional player, seemingly ready for retirement - It helps if you haven't scored a competitive clean sheet since the 3rd place game of Baptism of Fire 73. Playing as the last game in Group B, the team already knew they had to match Kohnhead's (assumed) battering of the Orion Islands, a team they only won 3 goals to 2, to advance. In other words, they need a win, one that would put them 2nd in the group behind the winners New Lusitania. But something was off for Kyushichi that day.

Make me a promise, tell me you'll stay with me
If I'm bein' honest, I don't know where this leads
But that's the only question, baby, don't keep me guessin'

Ever since getting into the Inkhallan league as a youngster, his dream was to represent his nation at the World Cup - An event dominated by the likes of Aguazul, Eura, Starblaydia, Valanora and Turori. Unfortunately, Inkhalla didn't take part in this pristine competition, not before the Squidroids made the nation a hellscape.

He could still remember his parents, fleeing from Inkopolis as the insane mob of controlled humans and squids got closer and closer. While he was fighting them off with whatever weapons he had, his parents didn't fight back. It was only months after Takanori freed the nation when he found out that they were killed due to the mismanagement that caused the Apocalypse. He promised the new Squidroidia that he will not be corrupt and bring the nation to its knees - Only to nearly do that. Only economic reforms and a loosening of civil rights caused the situation to get better, caused by Higa's pathetic attempts to shut the Inklings up from getting back to their normal, pre-Apocalypse jobs.

But Kyushichi's playing career rested on Takanori getting him back to football, a job that he had right away. Playing for the Inklings of Inkopolis FC, from the 2 time winners in the classic era to 2 2nd place finishes in the first 2 years of the Super League, the 36 year old got his playing experience back - Only at the twilight of his career. Only the national team manager, Ryūzaki Mito, trusted him, and even then he betrayed him by starting Shingen for most of the WC86 qualification campaign, not to mention shouting at him in the face during halftime of the very first Squidroidian national team game.

He has only kept 4 clean sheets since the Squidroidians first fielded a national team.

Ooh, you are my muse, I feel so reckless
Oh, you're makin' me, makin' me, makin' me give in

And none since Northwest Kalactin visited Inkopolis.

Oh, baby, I can feel the rush of adrenaline
I'm not scared to jump if you want to
Let's just fall in love for the hell of it
Maybе we'll just keep fallin'

Even as he refused to keep the opposition's score at 0, Kyushichi got tons of success for his team. People often remember him for that absurd IAC run the team had, beating Abahnfleft and eventual champions Poafmersia before getting 3rd place and their first bronze medals. But even then he only had 2 clean sheets - The opening game against Kayangan and the 3rd place match against Tequilo. Let's be fair, he wasn't as good as a certain Woryand goalkeeper, but that's what you get at the twilight of your career. Even at the Baptism of Fire, he got a clean sheet once, the 5-0 demolition of the Gothanita Isles. And of course, he conceded 5 against Cassadaigua in WC86 qualification.

As he thought to himself on the career he had, he heard a familiar voice calling him.

"Kyushichi! We're waiting on you!"

It was Ryūzaki himself. The goalkeeper would put on his gloves and walk out of the locker room, before meeting the famed Squidroidian manager.

When I'm around ya, I feel it in my veins
There's something about ya that's makin' me go insane
We have a storm to weather, my little sweet surrender

"Kyushichi... I know how this feels for you. Your potential final game a shotstopper. Even if we win, every proceeding game could be your last. Trust me, I was there before for my team. My group of plucky underdogs from Laguna Bay, winning the Inkhallan title the season I hung them up. I feel you."

Kyushichi would nod in front of his manager. staring at the Squidroidians lined up against their Valladar opponents. He only just realized that a draw would also put them through, but just like in qualification the team could either win or lose. It was 50-50.

"Mito, I understand that. I know that this is my last rodeo here for the team. I can't end it on a sour note. I have to go as far as I can and push them further and further until they win. And I know they will lose eventually. Mito, I will do the best I can tonight." He would proceed to his position in the line of Inklings.

The whole world was watching Squidroidia as they and Valladares took to the pitch. The underdogs who beat Geektopia and Kohnhead earlier in the tournament, and Quebec, Devonta and Flavovespia before that in World Cup 86 qualification, were on their last legs. Ryuzaki hadn't been in this position since the Euro Cup days. The team had to win to stay alive, they cannot settle for 5th in their group. This was Kyushichi's swan song, the last chance to bring his beloved nation to glory in the sticks. Win and they're in. Draw and they're in at a weaker position. Lose and he's gone for good.

Even then he felt like it wasn't enough. This team wasn't good enough for Valladares, or whoever they face in the knockouts. New Lusitania made sure of that. Kohnhead and Geektopia seemed like flukes. It seemed like it was over before it really began. It seemed like he was already preparing to hang the gloves. He stood in silence as the Squidroidian national anthem played, the last time he would hear that on the pitch. It was already over in his mind. He was going to concede goals. His team was going to lose. Only another miracle could put them in the knockout stage.

Just like what happened for Squidroidia in qualification for the biggest prize in football, going from 2nd to 5th in the group of death...

Maybe we'll just keep fallin'.

[Flavovespia]

Flavovespia 3–2 Abanhfleft

In one of the crucial matches in the second half of the group stage, Flavovespia pulled out the win to put them into the knockout stage, with two games still to play. For the second Cup of Harmony in a row, Flavovespia will progress beyond the group stage, and once again have done it before the final Matchday.

The only notable absence was Tony Gardner, out with a slight knock, so Paul Rodwell lined up alongside club teammate Alexander May in the centre back position. Other than that, there were no changes, as Arnold Stevenson continued to look happy with his side.

Much like the previous games Flavovespia had been involved in, it was an energetic start, with both teams looking to get the ball forward quickly and with purpose. There was a sense that this game would have goals in it. Indeed that prophecy came true. In the 14th minute, Feld’s pass in from the left fell to Coleman in a good position just inside the box. He took a touch, and then sent in an accurate curling shot, beyond the reach of the goalkeeper to make it 1-0 to Flavovespia.

Abanhfleft weren’t disheartened however. Just 5 minutes later, and their top striker got goalside of Paul Rodwell, just beating the offside trap. The one on one was taken well, little Aarif Muhammad could do about it, and Abanhfleft had equalised. For the first time in the tournament, Flavovespia had conceded, a remarkable run coming to an end.

On the half-hour mark, it got worse for Flavovespia. From a free-kick around 40 metres out, a marking mix up saw their midfielder completely unmarked at the far post. They were under little pressure, and despite Aarif Muhammad scampering across the goal, could only get a slight touch on the ball as it flew past him from the shot. 1-2 now in Abanhfleft’s favour, Flavovespia now behind for the first time in the tournament.

Flavovespia needed a goal from somewhere, and preferably before the half-time whistle. Thankfull they got one. Scott Coleman wasn’t the obvious target-man from a corner, but James King’s corner in flew in his direction. Coleman’s header looped up a bit and wasn’t the most powerful, but cleared the defence and goalkeeper and dipped under the bar. 2-2 now, in an exciting encounter between two teams at the top end of Group C, and 2 goals for Coleman, his tournament coming alive now. The half-time whistle would come with both sides still level.

The key moment of the second half came around 10 minutes in. Steven Hall had his shot blocked by a defender sliding in to deflect it away for the corner, but the Flavovespian captain gestured to his arm. The referee paused before the corner, listened to his earpiece and ran over to the pitchside monitor. Fans in the stadium looking at the big screen, fans watching on TV at home and crucially the referee could see it: the shot was blocked by an arm outstretched away from the body. The referee ran back and pointed at the spot. Penalty! There was no doubt who would take it for Flavovespia. Scott Coleman composed himself, stepped up and sent the goalkeeper the wrong way, although the shot, hard and right inside the post looked almost unstoppable. He had his hat-trick, and Flavovespia had the lead.

A little over 30 minutes remained for Abanhfleft to rescue a point, or even retake the lead. Flavovespia made changes at the back however, Iain Brown and Stephen Shepherd in for Paul Rodwell and David Blythe. The two new defenders seemed to provide more strength at the back, albeit with Flavovespia less capable of throwing men forward. Abanhfleft were being limited in their chances, but had a lot of possession further away from Flavovespia’s goal. Additionally, they had some good shots on targets, requiring Aarif Muhammad to save well, or in one case Alexander May to block well with his feet.

As the game wore on, Abanhfleft kept pushing forward, but there was a sense of vulnerability to the counter attack creeping in. Arnold Stevenson sensed that, taking off Jonathan Feld for Marc Sharratt in the final 10 minutes. Hall switched to the left flank with Ace on the right flank, and Sharratt was sat on the shoulder of Coleman, the substitute looking to make runs from the deep. Sharratt had a good chance to score a minute before injury time, pulling a good save from the goalkeeper. Christopher Ace was then unlucky he couldn’t get the rebound under control as the Abanhfleft defence were left flat footed on the counter.

That miss wouldn’t come back to haunt Flavovespia, they saw out injury time and won the game 3-2. It may not have been their best performance of the tournament so far, but they showed spirit and resolve to turn around a losing position in a back and forth game. Good substitutions and strategy by Arnold Stevenson also helped, as he is continuing to restore the faith the FFA showed in him, and building a rapport with the fans.

Sargossa continued their winning run, although The Gothanita Isles pushed them hard in a 2-3 result. Mattijana took a 2-1 win over Megistos, potentially a crucial result in the battle for qualification. With Abanhfleft and Megistos to play each other on the final Matchday, it isn’t possible for both these sides to finish above Flavovespia, and that guarantees the qualification of Flavovespia to the Final 32.

Megistos 0–2 Flavovespia

Qualification to the knockout stages was assured, but Flavovespia weren’t prepared to take their foot off the accelerator yet, and continued with another win in their penultimate group game. Tony Gardner was back in the defence, which had looked a little shaky in his absence. The only other change was of a more cosmetic nature, the all-white away kit was worn.

Megistos needed points to go through in their first Cup of Harmony tournament, and it was them who were attacking hard in the early exchanges. Flavovespia looked surprisingly rattled, as they struggled to get the ball towards their attacking quadruplet. Megistos looked the more likely to score, and if not for some unfortunately wasted shots, may have actually done so.

That profligacy would unfortunately be their downfall. In contrast to Megistos, Flavovespia only had a few half cut chances. However in the 26th minute one of those was the opener. A free-kick from James King was sent in direct at goal. 23 metres out, he got the right power and curve on it, to take it beyond the wall, and past the diving goalkeeper. No defender could get a block, as the ball nestled itself into the net. 0-1 to Flavovespia, maybe not the most deserved lead, but they had the lead.

The rest of the first half so no major chances for either side, both teams occasionally getting close but no efforts that should’ve definitely found the back of the net. 0-1 at half time, Megistos would’ve been disappointed given their good start, Flavovespia a little relieved one moment of great skill putting them in the lead.

The second half started as a much more cagey affair than the first half. Megistos needed a way back into the game, to keep their chances of making the knockout stages in their own hands, and not reliant on the Sargossa vs Mattijana result. Flavovespia had the lead, and didn’t really need to take too many risks, although they weren’t just going to put 11 men behind the ball and go for a 0-1 win.

It was James King on the hour mark who doubled his and Flavovespia’s tally. Jonathan Feld’s cross in was flicked away, but not far from the box. King got there and met the cries of “shoot” from the crowd first time. His shot flew almost straight into the corner, and the goalkeeper had no chance of reaching it. 0-2 to Flavovespia, after the early nerves, they’d taken control of this game now.

Megistos seemed to be deflated from that second goal. They were still looking for at least one goal to get back into it, but there was a sense that their attacks just lacked the venom and bite of some of their early play. The Flavovespian defence looked more assured now, and Aarif Muhammad was left relatively untroubled. William Somers (for Jonathan Feld), David Lyons (for Scott Vaughan) and Ramon Martin (for Christopher Ace) were all substitutions in the later stages, although all 3 didn’t make a big impact, for better or for worse. In the end the 0-2 win for Flavovespia sets them up nicely for their final group stage match with Sargossa. Megistos meanwhile, go into the final Matchday with an outside chance of a knockout stage berth.

Flavovespia go into their final game against Sargossa knowing that if there’s a winner, they finish top of Group C. Flavovespia crucially only need a draw to keep hold of the top spot, but in the last tournament, they fell to a loss to Kohnhead in a similar position. Arnold Stevenson will hope for no complacency this time from Flavovespia. Abanhfleft are through, and are currently 3rd. They’ll likely finish there, but a win for Flavovespia and Abanhfleft in the final Matchday could put the latter second. Mattijana lie 4th on 6 points. Avoiding a loss between Huayramarca sends Mattijana through. Megistos need a win over Abanhfleft to go through, and hope Mattijana lose. The Gothanita Isles have finished their 6 games, 3 draws and 3 losses and are returning home. Huayramarca are just playing for pride and KPB ranking points now.

Code: Select all

OOC: A small error in my previous RP has been corrected, thank you Sarzonia for pointing that out.

[Graintfjall]

Brynjólfursson dismisses calls for Vilbertsdóttir recall despite further injury losses

Sigtryggur Brynjólfursson has ruled out recalling Emeli Vilbertsdóttir to the national squad, despite being forced to play 83 minutes of football against Tequilo with only one full-back following a tournament-ending injury to Else Svennsdóttir. Svennsdóttir took over at left-back following Vilbertsdóttir’s dismissal from the squad following allegations of public indecency with a sapient trouser press, and reverted to her favored right-back role once Karoline Vernerisdóttir limped off injured against Bloumany, but her Cup of Harmony is now over as she tore her hamstring 7 minutes into the Tequilo tie. Vilbertsdóttir “will not be recalled under any circumstances” insisted Brynjólfursson after the game – a position that will leave him forced to start a center-back out of position in their next match, and hope for Vernerisdóttir’s imminent recovery before the knockout stages begin.

Vernerisdóttir is listed as questionable for the knockout stage, but continues to remain with the squad and has engaged in what assistant coach Særún Toresdóttir called “light workouts”. 31 year old Ásgautur Johannesson – himself only relatively recently recovered from injury sustained during the Baptism of Fire tournament – is the sole remaining fit full-back in the squad for the final match of the group stage, against co-hosts Ethane. A strict disciplinarian known for his traditionalist attitudes, Brynjólfursson is said to be incensed by Vilbertsdóttir’s refusal to apologize for the embarrassing incident in which Vilbertsdóttir was discovered in a “steamy” scene in a Kirkham nightclub bathroom. The 23 year old defender insists she was merely using the trouser press to iron her dress and has “nothing to apologize for”, but such stubbornness is clearly doing nothing to help her regain her place in the squad.

Normally priding themselves on their fitness, injuries have been a major concern for the Snow Wolves at the Cup of Harmony. The absence of striker Jason Þórhallursson was painfully apparent in a distinct lack of attacking ambition; Lyngar Rögnvaldursson proved an insubstantial replacement and Justiina Dannysdóttir was a shadow. But it is the full-back position that has been particularly afflicted, and Vilbertsdóttir’s indiscretions have only compounded the problem. Brynjólfursson’s stern line has met with mixed reactions. Steinaux striker Petter Erlingsson has supported the decision, saying “team discipline has to come first”. Women’s groups, however, have rallied to Vilbertsdóttir’s cause, accusing Knattspyrnusamband Græntfjalls of “sexism” and “double standards”. Svennsdóttir herself has criticized Vilbertsdóttir’s treatment and as she was prepared to be flown home for treatment said that recalling her would be “the right thing to do”. “What happens between a man and a woman, or between a trouser press and a woman, in the privacy of their own home, or of a nightclub bathroom, is nobody’s business but their own,” she said.

Svennsdóttir’s injury cast a pall over what ended up being a successful night for the Snow Wolves, who claimed a valuable upset win thanks to Amanda Guttisdóttir’s second-half goal. The victory assures them of a knockout stage berth. Aside from the result, though, the game was not a classic for the ages. The Liga-TQ is one of the more popular leagues in Græntfjall thanks to the attractive, attacking style of play as well as the colorful demeanor of Tequilan commentators; clubs such as Jaguar Ixtacomitán, Pingüinos, and Atlás Ciuredor have some measure of Græntfjaller fan support. Unfortunately, such exciting football was not on show at the Sentient Oval, where – with star striker Tlacolotl absent through injury and fellow forward Ecuador clearly some way below full fitness as he failed to return for the second half – Los Pitxileros cut a rather drab presence across the field. Critics will charge that was as much a response to Brynjólfursson’s leaden tactics. Four total shots on goal – two at either end – manifested in 90 minutes of stultifyingly dull football.

Of those four, the crucial one came from Guttisdóttir. Seemingly condemned to play a deep-lying role rather than her preferred more attacking position in Brynjólfursson’s defensive – some would say negative – systems, she had a poor first half, played off the park by the bruising presence of Ixtub Tün. She showed resolve, though, in a brighter second half, and was eventually able to shrug off her marker for just long enough to collect a neat pass from Bríana Noahsdóttir and scud a sharp left-footed strike just inside Oscar Bienvenida’s near post. The goal, against a run of play in which Tequilo owned 60% of possession, was enough for the win. Brynjólfursson’s defensive change as he swapped out center forward Lyngar Rögnvaldursson for center back Hjörleifur Reynarsson further stifled matters, and fielding four center backs proved suitably suffocating to any chances of a come-back. Tequilo were left to lash a couple of wild long-range strikes that did not trouble debutant Björnólfur Ernestisson (younger brother of Tom, who played right-back as an emergency replacement, marking the first time family members have taken the field in the same match for the Snow Wolves).

It wasn’t the display of confident or free-flowing football that critics have been calling for. “I’ve read about a hundred articles about how Græntfjall have proved they belong at international level,” charged journalist Olle Tobiasson. “How about they show that, then? Instead of playing every game like they’re afraid each goal they concede will consign them to oblivion.” Ásgautur Johannesson defended the team’s tactics, saying that “it was just important to get a win here”. “Tequilo were the favorites coming into this, so I think we can be proud. It’s very disappointing to lose Else but injuries happen, and what matters now is putting together a good run in the knockout stages.” Changes are expected for the upcoming match against Ethane; while Brynjólfursson has stressed the importance of winning every possible game, with qualification assured and injury concerns ever present, it represents a chance to rest some of his midfielders and try out alternative positions; either Ernestisson or Reynarsson will fill in right-back. Elektra Lúthersdóttir has been called up to replace Svennsdóttir in the squad.

Græntfjall – 1 (0)
B. Ernestisson; Johannesson (86’), Farmansson, Álfarsson, Svennsdóttir (7’ T. Ernestisson ); H. Snæþórsson, Guttisdóttir (54’), Jvarsson, Noahsdóttir; Dannysdóttir (73’ Antoninsson ); Rögnvaldursson (63’ Reynarsson )

Tequilo – 0 (0)
Bienvenida; Lea, Apeiztegui, Machinena (82’), Chicchan (53’); Tün; Artechevarria (72’ Neá ), Tafalla, Leyton (72’ Bailén ); Ito, Ecuador (45’ Gorostola (90+1’))

Also in the paper:

• NEWS: Government at loggerheads over tax bill
• BUSINESS: Property tycoon says lack of skills investment holding back affordable house building
• HISTORY: On this day – the Battle of St. Margaret’s Chicken
• ENTERTAINMENT: ‘Goose Coast Beat’ sweeping club scene
• SPORT: IBC preparations underway, almost seven basketballs fully inflated

[Savigliane]

SWANS CONTROL OWN DESTINY BEFORE FINAL MATCHDAY

Jean-Baptisté Blanc, The Villeneuve Daily

LESTON, Ethane -- Savigliane haven’t always impressed in their Cup of Harmony debut, taking just five points from their first five matches. But an improbable series of slip-ups from the Group H favorites, Jeruselem and Taeshan, have allowed Edward Hernandez’s swans to sneak into the playoff spots. With just one match to play, a win over Jeruselem (or a draw and Oberour Ar Moro getting a result against Taeshan) would ensure Savigliane’s qualification to the Round of 32.

The Swans got off to a poor start against fourth seeds Oberour ar Moro, the type of team many believed they would need to get a result against the qualify. Alas, Savigliane were outclassed by Matthieu Augier’s side. Invicta striker Taran Bele was seemingly everywhere in the opening minutes, taking advantage of a rare Efisio Moreau mistake by intercepting a pass meant for Notari before sweeping a low finish home. Bele followed things up just eight minutes later with a header off of a du Conant de la Mollette corner-kick, sending Oberour ar Moro 2-0 up just fifteen minutes into the match. A shell-shocked Swans side then conceded a penalty that Pierres Branon sidefooted past a diving Notari, and just half an hour into Savigliane’s first match, they were already down and out - a late diving header from young Thea Squarciafichi, aesthetically pleasing as it may have been, was little consolation.

Omerica was expected to be an even tougher test in Savigliane’s second group stage matchday, but Hernandez’s squad proved themselves to be up for the challenge. Again, the Swans conceded first thanks to a speculative-turned-stunning long-range effort from the prolific Alexis Chrysanthos. But this time, the Swans fought back, and it was Bertrand Marchetti’s beautiful solo run into the box that won them the equalizing penalty, converted ably by Francesco Grimaldi. Although Omerica pulled ahead - this time Chrystanthos making a strong run before laying off to a marauding Red Bolton for a surgical finish - just before the half, Savigliane came out of the tunnel with a lot of fight left in them. The halftime insertions of Giovanna Vitale and Thea Squarciafichi proved vital, as both were involved in the just-after-halftime goal of Amara Vatrican, with Vitale providing a cross and Squarciafichi the first shot, whose deflection was pushed toward the AC Acqui Bollente midfielder. The game settled down afterward, although both sides still found plenty of chances, and it was Isabella Coste who finished things late with a sidefooted finish in the box.

The next two matches, however, were a disaster. After taking an early 3-1 lead through goals from Marchetti, Grimaldi, and Lefebvre, Savigliane inexplicably took their foot off the gas against group seventh seeds Springmont (who have since been eliminated), and a pair of late goals ensured that they would only take a point from the encounter. And on Edward Hernandez’s homecoming, Savigliane were outgunned in a ninety-minute shootout by a score of 4-2, with a Grimaldi brace proving not enough against their attack-minded opposition.

The match against Taeshan, the groups’ top seeds who were also somehow winless after their first three matches, then became vital toward Savigliane’s hopes of progression. The Swans again fell behind early through a long-range effort from Shiloh Morgenstern. Against most teams, going behind 1-0 early wasn’t that big of a deal, but against the über-defensive Purple Knights, it was a death sentence. Although there were eighty minutes left, fans resigned themselves to watching eighty minutes of Savigliane’s attack running into a brick wall. And at the half, it really did seem that way, as the Swans mustered just one shot on target in the opening forty-five. But again, attack-minded insertions (this time Adrian Toscani replacing Dirac while Gigi Vitale replaced Fabiano Dutto) brought some much-needed life into the attack. Just five minutes after halftime, the young Toscani found himself an unlikely hero when his header off of Marchetti’s corner-kick found the back of the net. Taeshan pushed forward relentlessly, but couldn’t get a second goal, and Savigliane earned a point against arguably the most talented team in the tournament.

After Taeshan’s scoreless draw against Jeruselem, the battle for fourth place will come down to the final matchday, as Savigliane find themselves up against the top two seeds in the group, both inexplicably underperforming in Group H. A win against Jeruselem will send the Swans to the knockout stages, while a loss will put Jeruselem into fourth. Meanwhile, a draw will eliminate Jeruselem, but leave Savigliane dependent on Taeshan’s winless form continuing against Oberour ar Moro, not something any fan will be willing to risk. Still, while Savigliane have had their ups and downs throughout this tournament, to control their own destiny with one matchday to play is no small feat, and finishing ahead of two of the World Cup’s most storied nations wouldn’t hurt, either.

[Krytenia]

Part I: Miasma
Part II: Mistral
Part III: Tempestuous
Part IV: Trickledown
Part V: Emmenthal
Part VI: Exponents
Part VII: Audience

IBIXAN PIECES

Part VIII: Administrator

Andrew Forssell (Presiding Officer of the Witting): We now proceed to the Ibixa Renovation Bill, final reading. Mr Prime Minister!

Charles Linton (REF - Wall Vale, Prime Minister): Thank you, Mr Prime Minister. As you all know, this bill has been under intense scrutiny in the Committee Halls for some weeks now, going over the financials and logistics with a fine-toothed comb. What we now bring to the final reading of the vote is a final proposal, costed and measured for potential for both public prosperity and the welfare of the Ibixan people. I believe that this is a unique opportunity for the Krytenian people, and one we need to take a hold of now. The transformation of the place into a rich, biodiverse land, able to contribute to the bread basket of Krytenia, creating jobs and homes, and leading to a bright future for Krytenians and Ibixans alike. We have, for too long, watched with jealousy as the Quebecois and the Starblaydis have grown powerhouse economies whilst we have sat back and rested on our laurels. It's time to invest, be bold, and retake our place at the top table of Atlantian Oceania.

Sarah Finch (CON - North West Quinneth, Leader of the Opposition): What this is, is a needless sunk cost. Once again, the Prime Minister brings a proposal before us with the promise of jam tomorrow, whilst spending a fair-sized chunk of the nation's coffers today. And for what; some raw materials and farmland? Where is the promise of industry? Where is the commercial beating heart? This is Government posing on a vanity project, trying to show they care about the welfare of these people whilst treating them as political pawns.

Charles Linton (REF - Wall Vale, Prime Minister): We're not you. We're doing this to reclaim a fertile land, and use it to bolster Krytenia. How is this a bad thing?

Lisa Storey (GRN - Aigburth Wavertree): When you begin playing God on a continental scale. This has the potential to backfire horribly.

Charles Linton (REF - Wall Vale, Prime Minister): Science disagrees with the Leader of the Greens. The infrastructure that this project brings will set Ibixa on the road to prosperity. If they didn't believe so, they wouldn't have voted in favour.

Jack Forbes (REF - Ousevale Dalton, Minister for Agriculture, Food, and the Environment): There is no risk involved here. Ibixa has nothing to lose and everything to gain.

---

...some time later...

Andrew Forssell (Presiding Officer of the Witting): It is now time for the Bill to be put to vote. All in favour, say "Aye".

A loud smattering of Ayes, mostly from the Government benches, can be heard.

Andrew Forssell (Presiding Officer of the Witting): All against, say "No".

A similar volume of Nos come from the opposition.

Andrew Forssell (Presiding Officer of the Witting): We do not have a verbal consensus, therefore we go to a formal vote count. CLEAR THE CHAMBERS!

The various MWs file out of the main Witting chamber, and then begin to file through the Aye and No antechambers on their way back in. Once all have voted, the tellers tally the results, and present them to the Presiding Officer.

Andrew Forssell (Presiding Officer of the Witting): The vote has been cast and tallied. The Ayes in favour, two hundred and sixty. The Nos against, two hundred and forty-six. The Ayes have it, and the bill is hereby passed.

[Twicetagram and JYPe]

Twicetagria vs Krytenia
By Antonov Vasiliev

After we took a poll on how people thought we would ffare against Krytenia, here are the results:
86%- no
14%- draw
0%- win

That's how hopeless we are.

[Indusse]

IFA NEWS NETWORK
A Win isn't enough!

After the match against Electrum which the team lost for a score of 2–3. The CoH Qualifications have turned to be really hard. The next match against Sulsuland is a very important one. If Indusse wants to qualify then they will have to defeat Sulsuland and wait for Margaret to decide the fate. After winning the match against Sulsuland, indusse only has 30-40% of qualifying. There are 3 chances of events to happen. They are:

1. Winner Winner Sulsu Dinner:
Indusse defeats Sulsuland in the final Matchday and HUElavia defeats South Newlandia. If this happens Indusse reaches the fourth position and qualified for the CoH next round.

2. Tit for Tat:
In the second chance, if Indusse defeats Sulsuland and South Newlandia defeats HUElavia. Then it's the end.. Eventhough Indusse and South Newlandia have equal number of points, according to H2H, South Newlandia qualifies to the next round.

3. Adiós CoH:
This is the final event, Indusse loses to Sulsuland and South Newlandia either wins or loses to HUElavia. If they win they get directly Qualified to the next round. If they draw then according to H2H, they qualify.

Therefore, Comparing all these probabilities using Trial and Error Method we can reach a
conclusion that only and only if Indusse defeats Sulsuland and South Newlandia is defeated by HUElavia, then Indusse can peacefully qualify for the CoH Next Round.

Indusse 2-3 Electrum
Baskar 67' -
Mersiás 69' -

[Sylestone]

SENTIENT
SENTINEL

NEW SARUM, ETHANE
The Stove walked onto the makeshift podium in the New Sarum town square, hiding the fear in his sentient eyes with courage and determination. He knew he had to do this. He knew what had happened and he felt terrible. He had to apologise, admit that he wasn't thinking clearly. No, that wasn't good enough. He had to admit it was his fault. But that was the problem. It wasn't. He made a mistake, yes, but why would he leave a chunk of ethane in the stands of the ground? But the victims would want him to apologise and take full responsibility. So he took a deep breath as the official finished speaking and walked onto the stage to a mixture of clapping and booing. And then he started.
"First of all, I would like to pay my respects to this wonderful country for letting me stand here today and share what I have been feeling. I am deeply grateful that any of you would even think of giving a second chance to someone who has destroyed so much. But today isn't about me. It's about those people who lost their lives in that disastrous explosion. My best wishes go out to everyone affected by it. In compensation, I would like to give every family who lost one of their own in the explosion 500,000 Sylestonean Dollars (OOC: AUD) to help repair, although I do know money doesn't answer for everything. To add on to this, if anyone needs consolation, I will always be here if any of you need me. I do hope every single one of you in this crowd today will forgive me for my unwarranted actions and to please let me keep on playing here for Letson Town. I have thoroughly enjoyed this amazing country and will do whatever I can to keep it that way. But if not, so be it. What happened was my fault. I didn't mean it to happen, but it did. No one else was at fault on that dark day but me. But it's over and I would like to move on. The faces of the victims will remain in my mind for the rest of my days and will never be forgotten. My best wishes to all of you. Thanks you.
The Stove left to rupturous applause and some quiet sobbing as he walked off the podium. He walked back to the station and got on the train to Deloitte. When he got to the team hotel, he heard cheers from the living room. Sylestone had won a convincing game 2-0 against Pot 7 side Murphtannia to secure their spot in the Round of 32. The Bar Stool and Spiderwebs had scored the goals. Their final game of the group stage will be against Xanneria, who has got 15 points from 5 games. Will Sylestone be able to stop their winning streak? Only time will tell.

SYLESTONE - 2
Bar Stool 51'
Spiderwebs 75'

MURPHTANNIA - 0

[HUElavia]

HUElavia Wakes Up and Clinches Qualification to the Knockouts!

Sulsuland 1–5 HUElavia
(SuLSu 26' | Hamada 51', 52', 55', 57', 60')
(King Edward IV Stadium, New Sarum)

HUElavia 2–0 Astograth
(Cristiano 32', 80')
(King Edward IV Stadium, New Sarum)

HUElavia came into Matchday 5 and 6 needing to start getting victories in order to aspire to the knockout rounds. Now playing in New Sarum, the Capital of Ethane, HUElavia was looking to fill up more and more of the stadiums with HUElavians, in order to give the team moral support. Needless to say, coming off an important and historical victory against Electrum (thanks to two goals by Hamada), it gave the B-Team with Vannier starting some motivation to play well, as well as the A-Team with Lobato in goal (where they were expected to play against Astograth). The stadium was packed and the matches were underway.

The first game against Sulsuland was underwhelming during the first half, reflective of the tournament so far for Los Amarillos/Os Amarelos, as Sulsuland took the lead in the 26th minute, when he made a shot that curved over a diving Vannier and into the goal to make it 1-0. The bizarre Sulsu were celebrating in passion while the HUElavians were stunned and were staring down at possible elimination heading into the big matches against Astograth and South Newlandia at halftime. In the second half, Moutinho was subbed off for Hamada, which ended up being one of the greatest substitutions ever made in HUElavian history. In a span of 9 minute, Hamada slotted in 5 goals. Robbing balls from the defense and shooting it past Dave’s Mom twice, getting passes from Sakaguchi for a Yamoto-HUElavian connection brought two more goals, and a corner taken by Conti allowed Hamada to chest the ball down and blast it past Dave’s Mom to make it the definitive 1-5. At the end, Hamada was mobbed by her teammates as they celebrated her Glut, along with her and her boyfriend Navarro celebrating together with a passionate hug and kiss. HUElavia took the first major step to advance.

The second match was the main highlight of Group F, the Pot 1 and Pot 2 teams of HUElavia and Astograth facing off against each other. Astograth came in as group leaders, having a perfect 4-0-0 record and having not conceded a single goal in the competition. For the match, a victory for Los Amarillos/Os Amarelos would be enough to clinch qualification to the Round-of-32. Surely enough, it was the case, as Cristiano put up a dominating performance to add to his name on the goal scorers for HUElavia in the CoH. In the 32nd minute, a counter attack had Cristiano, Rossi and Duran facing off against Echeberz, Leskerre and Doyenard. Duran passed it to Rossi on the side, who gave a cross into the box, which Cristiano towered over Doyenard to head it past Bedigax into the goal to make it 1-0. The crowd went crazy, jumping with joy and passion to make the stadium rumble, while Cristiano did his traditional power stance and celebrated in the corner with his teammates. Although, in the 80th minute, he'd get another chance, where he passed it to Gallego (in for Sakaguchi in the 65th minute), which Gallego passed it back to Cristiano to slide it past a diving Bedigax to make it 2-0. The crowd in front of goal went crazy once again, jumping and cheering with passion to make the stadium rumble, while Cristiano celebrated with his teammates, knowing he came up big once again. Shortly after, the match ended and HUElavia clinched their spot to the Round-of-32.

HUElavia has made a stunning turnaround after Matchday 3, going from 1 Point and a 0-1-1 record to 10 Points and a 3-1-1 record. They sit in 2nd Place behind Astograth, who have 12 Points (4-0-1). HUElavia will play against South Newlandia, a Pot 3 team, which that team needs to win their match to clinch their spot to the Round-of-32. Los Amarillos/Os Amarelos do not look to do favors, as they have a shot to win Group F after a stunning comeback they have done. The A-Team will play again, with Lobato in goal and Cristiano as Captain. The HUElavian crowd looks to support their team, with 50% of the stadium expected to be draped in Yellow, Blue and Green. The Blue Alternative uniform will be used for the match. Here's to giving it another win and possibly winning Group F.

FORCA HUELAVIA! VAMOS HUELAVIA! GO HUELAVIA!