CURRENT DRAFT:
[Title] The Devil's Spawn
[Validity] None
[Description] Big baby news from Blackacre! Supreme Leader Valeria Drake - your longtime rival - has given birth to her first child. With heartfelt congratulations pouring in from leaders all across @@REGION@@ over Twitcher, the international community has turned its gaze to you, eagerly awaiting your reaction.
[Option 1] The Minister of Foreign Relations lays @@HIS@@ hand on your right shoulder, the sunlight creating a bring halo around @@HIS@@ head. "Oh, let bygones be bygones already. This is a joyous occasion for Madam Drake! Let's break the ice between Blackacre and us, and send over our most cordial felicitations. It wouldn't kill us if we swallowed our pride for once, you know."
[Effect 1] @@LEADER@@ often expresses joy through clenched teeth
[Option 2] The Minister of Defense lays @@HIS@@ hand on your left shoulder, plucks of @@HIS@@ hair sticking up like horns. "Don't listen to that naive dimwit! We need to show the world that that vile succubus and her larva don't deserve any 'best wishes' to be sent their way. How about we discretely spread some nasty rumours about how the father of the child is a descendant of Lee Terallihitlah 'the Butcher of Bigtopia'? You'll see, all sympathy for that serpent and her spawn will melt away like snow."
[Effect 2] conspiracy theorists love hearing @@LEADER@@ tell tall tales about other people's families
[Option 3] An unsuspecting aide walks in on the three of you standing side-by-side. "Oh, uhm, s-sorry... but I came in to tell you that you could also simply ignore the entire affair. Pretend that you didn't notice all of @@REGION@@ congratulating the Supreme Leader because you were busy, uhm... Oh! Say you were busy volunteering in our orphanages for the day. It'll create a positive image of yourself, and you'd have an excuse no one could hold against you anytime you'd be faced with an undesirable situation!"
[Effect 3] @@LEADER@@ is rarely seen beyond @@NAME@@'s orphanages these days
[Option 4] Your Minister for AI Citizenship, an eerily organic-looking machine, approaches your desk with an uncanny smile. "There is a prime opportunity here that you're missing, @@LEADER@@. Recent advances in robotics have enabled us to create artificial beings that develop and grow like actual organics do. We could manufacture an identical replica of Madam Drake's firstborn, and if you'd launch a covert operation to swap the two infants, we'd literally have eyes, hands and ears in Blackacre."
[Validity] Must have AI Personhood, Must have high Scientific Advancement
[Effect 4] paranoid parents hover metal detectors over their newborn
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DRAFT 1: