[WAS IN QUEUE, RE-DRAFT] Commend Aumeltopia

[North Prarie]

Hi everyone! This is my first Security Council endeavor and I think Aumeltopia/Somyrion/Aumelodia is a fitting subject. There may be some fact-checking mistakes and exclusions (I am especially keen to add more stuff about his work in Forest as Mount Seymour, and maybe some stuff about Meihua too) so all feedback is appreciated.

Commend Aumeltopia
Category: Commend | Nominee: Aumeltopia

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The Security Council,

Praising [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as World Assembly Delegate of the South Pacific for almost a year from August 2019, overseeing at one stage a doubling in their endorsement tally from their inauguration as Delegate through active participation in the Southern World Assembly Initiative (SWAN), and the institution of Endorsement Days, where nations were urged to endorse as many other South Pacifican WA members as possible, and development of OWL, the South Pacific's World Assembly department, into an active and efficient organization that increased participation, comprehension, and authorship in the World Assembly among nations in the South Pacific,

Applauding Aumeltopia’s service as Celestial Being of Lazarus, a position they used to protect the region from internal and external threats while serving as a strong leader of the region, as well as serving as the Commander of the Lazarene Celestial Armada, a position they used to protect small regions from outside threats,

Recalling Aumeltopia’s work in defending natives nations and small regions from hostile invasions, including:

• their founding of an interregional defender alliance called Solidarity (Solidarian Fleet) at the end of 2016, where their courageous leadership helped restore regions destroyed by raiders,
• Co-founding the United Task Force in 2017, which served as a vehicle for joint military operations for defender militaries,
• Serving as the Minister of Military Affairs for the South Pacific, where they revamped the organizational and graphical style of the South Pacific Special Forces, crafting it into the military organization it is today,
• Establishing, as the Minister of Military Affairs, the SPSF Reserve, an organization that enabled citizens to help with military efforts without liberating or defending,

Appreciating Aumeltopia's service to Forest through the puppet nation of [nation=noflag] Mount Seymour[/nation], including:

• Administering and establishing the regional gathering places and forums,
• Leading the region as Forest Keeper, the chief executive of Forest, from January to September 2017,
• Organizing and leading the Forest Photo Contest, a photography event that is internationally recognized for its quality,
• Serving as Foreign Minister of Forest from November of 2016 to January of 2017, where they established embassies with five new partners,
• Serving as Culture Minister of Forest from September 2017 to January 2018,
• Leading Forest's effort to create the nuclear alliances of Forest and Canopy, factions that finished top 3 in 2017, 2018, and 2019, which protected nations from radiation and eliminated outside threats,

Observing Aumeltopia's work for one of the premier news publications in NationStates, NationStates Today, such as:

• Serving as a Director of Graphics and Publishing, a position where they curated the graphics and style of the organization and newspaper,
• Serving multiple terms as Governor of NationStates Today, an administrative position of the organization, a position they used to consult the Board and represent NationStates Today’s readership,

Grateful for Aumeltopia's authorship of SC #212 'Repeal "Liberate Kingdom of Ireland'", which ensured natives could protect their region from invasions via a password, and SC #307 "Condemn Auphelia", which condemned an extraordinarily evil nation notorious for terrorizing the South Pacific and her allies,

Admiring Aumeltopia’s extensive graphic design portfolio that has stood the test of time, including the flags of the Free Nations Region, the Union of Democratic States, and Forest, the graphics for one of the largest inter-regional festivals in history, PacificCon, as well as the universal design code for the South Pacific,

Honoring Aumeltopia's leadership, community, military, and graphical contributions to regions and organizations across NationStates,

Hereby Commends Aumeltopia.

Co-authored by The Noble Thatcherites and Tinhampton.

[Morover]

Given your co-authors, I feel it is a given, but it's worth asking anyways - do they want this?

More feedback pending.

[North Prarie]

Given your co-authors, I feel it is a given, but it's worth asking anyways - do they want this?

More feedback pending.

I haven't asked, as I intended it to be a sort of going away present (as well as acknowledging their extensive accomplishments, ofc), but I would assume so.

[Morover]

Given your co-authors, I feel it is a given, but it's worth asking anyways - do they want this?

More feedback pending.

I haven't asked, as I intended it to be a sort of going away present (as well as acknowledging their extensive accomplishments, ofc), but I would assume so.

Okay - so, while it isn't a requirement, I'd contact them and make sure that they're on-board with it.

[North Prarie]

I haven't asked, as I intended it to be a sort of going away present (as well as acknowledging their extensive accomplishments, ofc), but I would assume so.

Okay - so, while it isn't a requirement, I'd contact them and make sure that they're on-board with it.

I have done so.

[SkyDip]

RECALLING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s work in defending natives from hostile invasions, including:[list]
*]Founding the Defender group ‘Solidarity’ in late 2016, showcasing their dedication to the community and displaying early on their leadership skills,
[*]Serving as commander of the Lazarene Celestial Armada,
[*]Co-founding the United Task Force in 2017, which served as a vehicle for joint
[*]military operations for defender militaries,
[*]Serving as the Minister of Military Affairs for the South Pacific, where they revamped the organizational and [*]graphical style of the South Pacific Special Forces, crafting it into the military organization it is today,
[*]Establishing, as the Minister of Military Affairs, the Tidal Force, a first of its kind organization that enabled citizens to help with [*]military efforts without liberating or defending,

You've got multiple extra lines in there that are unnecessary.

APPLAUDING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as Celestial Being of Lazarus, a position they used to fortify regional security and establish community.

Period instead of comma here.

PRAISING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as current Delegate of the South Pacific and its service to SWAN, the program to encourage nations to become more involved in the World Assembly and to revamp World Assembly infrastructure in the South Pacific that serves as inspiration for other regions today,

You're switching your pronouns quite a bit here - their versus its.

RECOGNIZING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service on the Local Council of the South Pacific, a team that moderates the Regional Message Board and community activities,

The legality of this seems...questionable to me. Using Regional Message Board might be a violation of 4c. Perhaps modify the language there.

[Tinhampton]

Your points, as it stands, are a bit all over the place - here's a proposed reordering. You're welcome to take any part of this (or reject it outright); as usual, you don't have to list Tinhampton as a third co-author but do consider doing so if you think I've done a good job:

The Security Council,

GRATEFUL for the dedication that Aumeltopia (also known as [nation=noflag]Aumelodia[/nation], [nation=noflag]Somyrion[/nation], and [nation=noflag]Mount Seymour[/nation]) has put into defending nations from hostile invasions, including:

• their founding of an interregional defender alliance called Solidarity (Solidarian Fleet) at the end of 2016, where their courageous leadership helped enable raids of regions such as Jahkku - once a thriving creative community with more than 100 member nations - to be thwarted early,
• co-founding the United Task Force in 2017, which served as a vehicle for active co-operation between defender militaries, and
• service as the Celestial Being of the former Celestial Union of Lazarus during the first half of 2017, where their duties included protecting regional security and serving as the commander-in-chief of the defender-aligned Lazarene Celestial Armada,

RECOGNISING Aumeltopia's work in improving the South Pacific as a role model for aspiring feeder politicians and participants, especially through:

• as World Assembly Delegate for almost a year from August 2019, overseeing at one stage a doubling in their endorsement tally from their inauguration as Delegate, through active participation in the Southern World Assembly Initiative (SWAN) and the institution of Endorsement Days where nations were urged to endorse as many other South Pacifican WA members as possible,
• as Minister of Military Affairs, designing the logo and associated flag for the South Pacific Special Forces; and also establishing the Tidal Force, which enables South Pacifican citizens to provide practical support to the SPSF without having to become a fully-fledged SPSF member,
• designing the current logos of the Ministries of Foreign and Regional Affairs, the Legislator Committee, the Local Council, the Office of World Assembly Legislation, and SWAN, and
• former membership of the Local Council, which involved continued oversight of the South Pacific's community and Regional Message Board,

[perhaps insert clauses about Forest and Meihua here once you get enough info about them],

ADMIRING not only Aumeltopia's authorship of major international documents - such as the Constitution of the Free Nations Region, SC#212 "Repeal "Liberate Kingdom of Ireland,"" and SC#307 "Condemn Aumeltopia" - but also their outstanding and time-tested vexillological contributions (including the current flags of the Free Nations Region, the Union of Democratic States, and Forest), and

[C&Cs usually have a clause which summarise why the nominee should be C&Ced - I encourage you to include your own rationale here]:

Hereby Commends Aumeltopia.

Co-authored by The Noble Thatcherites and Kuriko.

Daytime to Night will be happy that I'm not doing this right at the very end - always happy to help out a fellow NS Sports person nonetheless

[Aumeltopia]

Your points, as it stands, are a bit all over the place - here's a proposed reordering. You're welcome to take any part of this (or reject it outright); as usual, you don't have to list Tinhampton as a third co-author but do consider doing so if you think I've done a good job:

The Security Council,

GRATEFUL for the dedication that Aumeltopia (also known as [nation=noflag]Aumelodia[/nation], [nation=noflag]Somyrion[/nation], and [nation=noflag]Mount Seymour[/nation]) has put into defending nations from hostile invasions, including:

• their founding of an interregional defender alliance called Solidarity (Solidarian Fleet) at the end of 2016, where their courageous leadership helped enable raids of regions such as Jahkku - once a thriving creative community with more than 100 member nations - to be thwarted early,
• co-founding the United Task Force in 2017, which served as a vehicle for active co-operation between defender militaries, and
• service as the Celestial Being of the former Celestial Union of Lazarus during the first half of 2017, where their duties included protecting regional security and serving as the commander-in-chief of the defender-aligned Lazarene Celestial Armada,

RECOGNISING Aumeltopia's work in improving the South Pacific as a role model for aspiring feeder politicians and participants, especially through:

• as World Assembly Delegate for almost a year from August 2019, overseeing at one stage a doubling in their endorsement tally from their inauguration as Delegate, through active participation in the Southern World Assembly Initiative (SWAN) and the institution of Endorsement Days where nations were urged to endorse as many other South Pacifican WA members as possible,
• as Minister of Military Affairs, designing the logo and associated flag for the South Pacific Special Forces; and also establishing the Tidal Force, which enables South Pacifican citizens to provide practical support to the SPSF without having to become a fully-fledged SPSF member,
• designing the current logos of the Ministries of Foreign and Regional Affairs, the Legislator Committee, the Local Council, the Office of World Assembly Legislation, and SWAN, and
• former membership of the Local Council, which involved continued oversight of the South Pacific's community and Regional Message Board,

[perhaps insert clauses about Forest and Meihua here once you get enough info about them],

ADMIRING not only Aumeltopia's authorship of major international documents - such as the Constitution of the Free Nations Region, SC#212 "Repeal "Liberate Kingdom of Ireland,"" and SC#307 "Condemn Aumeltopia" - but also their outstanding and time-tested vexillological contributions (including the current flags of the Free Nations Region, the Union of Democratic States, and Forest), and

[C&Cs usually have a clause which summarise why the nominee should be C&Ced - I encourage you to include your own rationale here]:

Hereby Commends Aumeltopia.

Co-authored by The Noble Thatcherites and Kuriko.

Daytime to Night will be happy that I'm not doing this right at the very end - always happy to help out a fellow NS Sports person nonetheless

I'm going to largely stay out here, as I should. I'm deeply honoured and I greatly respect Prarie, Thatcher, and Kuriko.

A couple of factual errors you've added, Tin, though:
- I didn't really defend anything or thwart invasions in Solidarity. Solidarity was "restoring" --i.e. working with regions during and after raids to re-set up the community and handle security. Calling it simply defender might make me sound, unduly, better, but it would be a disservice to what Solidarity really did/focused on.
- Commander of the LCA and Celestial Being were separate positions in CU Lazarus.
- I certainly didn't author a condemnation of myself

Alright, Somy out. o/

[Bormiar]

Aumeltopia made the graphics for the NationStates Great Exhibition back when it was just Agalaesia and I. They took a chance on it early, and I'm very grateful for that. I believe they also created the Pacific-Con graphics, though you'll need to check that. That being said, this is a stretch. I don't think Aumeltopia is ready to receive this, judging by what you've shown.

You have to understand that a commendation does quite a bit in shaping the perceptions of current and future players. We don't want to treat it lightly.

That's not to say I won't vote for this. I haven't seen enough.

[Honeydewistania]

I’m against this version. I think Somy can be commendable but this doesn’t reflect that. Like Celestial Armada. Who cares? What did they do? You gotta explain why it’s good. It’s quite light at the moment, you should include other stuff like issues/SC authorship, contribution to Forest, and so on. Also, your lists look weird. Get that check out.

[Bhang Bhang Duc]

RECOGNIZING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service on the Local Council of the South Pacific, a team that moderates the Regional Message Board and community activities,

The legality of this seems...questionable to me. Using Regional Message Board might be a violation of 4c. Perhaps modify the language there.

Using “posts” as in “posts to the RMB” is definitely illegal. I think RMB is okay as it’s an accepted game term like WFE (which is legal). However, in the past other authors have used phrases like “regional communications centre” to be certain they’re compliant with the rules.

I dislike the use of the word “moderates”. Yes we know they’re not Moderating, but for clarity a word like “manages” would be better.

Edit: Regional Message Board is legal per this ruling by Sedge (viewtopic.php?p=3946595&sid=20093a547291ffa695ab021b5cb3736f#p3946595) but with caveats.

[Bormiar]

The legality of this seems...questionable to me. Using Regional Message Board might be a violation of 4c. Perhaps modify the language there.

Using “posts” as in “posts to the RMB” is definitely illegal. I think RMB is okay as it’s an accepted game term like WFE (which is legal). However, in the past other authors have used phrases like “regional communications centre” to be certain they’re compliant with the rules.

I dislike the use of the word “moderates”. Yes we know they’re not Moderating, but for clarity a word like “manages” would be better.

Edit: Regional Message Board is legal per this ruling by Sedge (viewtopic.php?p=3946595&sid=20093a547291ffa695ab021b5cb3736f#p3946595) but with caveats.

Messages works fine instead of “posts”: https://www.nationstates.net/page=WA_pa ... /council=2

[Honeydewistania]

Also, just a stylistic choice, I’d recommend you don’t capitalise the first word of every clause.

[Kuriko]

I had to go to bed before we actually finished the rough draft, so I had very little part in writing the proposal beyond correcting the illegailities. Can you please remove me from the co-authors? More could have been added to it and it could have been restructured a bit, which can still happen I was just going to work on it more today.

[Praeceps]

Seconding Borm's and Honey's comments.

ADMIRING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s extensive graphic design portfolio that has stood the test of time, including:

• The current flag of the Free Nations Region
• The current flag of the Union of Democratic States
• The current flag of Forest
• The current flag of the South Pacific Special Forces
• The current graphics and logos for the Ministry of Foreign Affairs, Ministry of Regional Affairs, Legislator Committee, Office of World Assembly Legislation, and Local Council of the South Pacific

Regardless of accepting Tin's suggestions or not, for this section, I would suggest combining all of "The current flag of..." into one bullet point.

[Wymondham]

I will also note that Somy has done all of the graphics at NST and is currently Director of Graphics and Publishing as well as a governor there
Oh and full support for this, Somy is most definitely commendable

[North Prarie]

Hey everyone, made a couple of changes to the draft. I took a couple of Tinhampton's clauses from their proposal in the thread, which they said I could use, and added it into the draft, or merged it with what it was originally. Thanks so much, Tin! Here are some of the changes:

• I changed the Solidarity part to recognize that it was an organization meant to help raided communities
• I took out the Commander of the LCA part and put it into the section about Aume's work as Celestial Being
• I made my lists better
• Made all the sentence starters lowercase
• I changed the Delegate of TSP part in the original draft to be Tin's proposal for the clause
• I added a section about Aume's WA authorship
• I changed the graphic design part to just one sentence
• I added sections about Forest and NSToday
• I added an 'Honoring' section at the bottom

Again, all feedback is appreciated.

[Honeydewistania]

Expand on why writing Repeal Liberate Kingdom of Ireland and Condemn Auphelia benefitted people. For example: condemned an exceptionally evil nation infamous for terrorising the South Pacific and their allies etc

[North Prarie]

Expand on why writing Repeal Liberate Kingdom of Ireland and Condemn Auphelia benefitted people. For example: condemned an exceptionally evil nation infamous for terrorising the South Pacific and their allies etc

Done.

[Candensia]

Through Mount Seymour, Aumeltopia wrote issue #640. I'd mention this, if you haven't already. You can consult other issues C/Cs to see how it can be done legally.

[Bhang Bhang Duc]

The Security Council,

Recalling [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s work in defending natives from hostile invasions, including:

• their founding of an interregional defender alliance called Solidarity (Solidarian Fleet) at the end of 2016, where their courageous leadership helped restore regions destroyed by raiders,
• Co-founding the United Task Force in 2017, which served as a vehicle for joint military operations for defender militaries,
• Serving as the Minister of Military Affairs for the South Pacific, where they revamped the organizational and graphical style of the South Pacific Special Forces, crafting it into the military organization it is today,
• Establishing, as the Minister of Military Affairs, the SPSF Reserve, a first of its kind organization that enabled citizens to help with military efforts without liberating or defending,

This reads quite nicely until this bit - "organizational and graphical style". A military has a graphical style? Do you mean they have nice red uniforms like the Spanish Inquisition? Seriously, not sure what you mean by this, which detracts from an otherwise good clause.

Acknowledging their writing of the Constitution of the Free Nations Region, a document that has presided over the region for many years,

Many nations have written similarly long-lived regional constitutions so not Commendable of itself. But taken as part of the bigger picture it's fine.

Grateful for Aumeltopia's authorship of SC #212 "Repeal "Liberate Kingdom of Ireland", which ensured natives could protect their region from invasions via a password, and SC 307 "Condemn Auphelia", which condemned an extraordinarily evil nation notorious for terrorizing the South Pacific and her allies,

This feels like it should be more of an afterword, rather than in the middle of the text.

Applauding [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as Celestial Being of Lazarus. a position they used to protect the region, as well as serving as the Commander of the Lazarene Celestial Armada,

Remind me, Lazarus' Celestial Being was the Delegate right or is my memory playing tricks? So how long were they in that role, what did they do? What did they accomplish as head of the military. I seriously think you've missed a trick here. If you really want to commend Aumeltopia there's a whole blank space just wanting to be filled.

Praising [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as World Assembly Delegate of the South Pacific for almost a year from August 2019, overseeing at one stage a doubling in their endorsement tally from their inauguration as Delegate, through active participation in the Southern World Assembly Initiative (SWAN) and the institution of Endorsement Days where nations were urged to endorse as many other South Pacifican WA members as possible,

Yes well SWAN and Endorsement Days may have helped swell the tally, but let's not forget that every GCR Delegate got a huge boost in numbers during the Drewpocalypse. To gloss over this is disingenuous. What else did they accomplish?

Admiring [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s extensive graphic design portfolio that has stood the test of time, including the flags of the Free Nations Region, the Union of Democratic States, and Forest, as well as the universal design code for the South Pacific,

Strange that you give this almost equal weighting in terms of draft space to their time as TSP Delegate.

Appreciating [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]'s service to Forest through the puppet nation of Mount Seymour, including:

• Administering the regional gathering places and forums,
• Leading the region as Forest Keeper, the chief executive of Forest, from January to September 2017,
• Organizing the Forest Photo Contest, a photography event that is internationally recognized for its quality,
• Serving as Foreign Minister of Forest from November of 2016 to January of 2017,
• Serving as Culture Minister of Forest from September 2017 to January 2018,

That seems a solid list of achievements.

Observing [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]'s work for the largest news publication in NationStates, NationStates Today, such as:

• Serving as a Director of Graphics and Publishing, a position where they curated the graphics and style of the organization and newspaper,
• Serving multiple terms as Governor of NationStates Today, an administrative position of the organization,

Not my favourite publication, but okay.

Honoring [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]'s leadership, community, military, and graphical contributions to regions and organizations across NationStates,

Hereby Commends Aumeltopia.

Co-authored by The Noble Thatcherites and Tinhampton.

For a first time here it's a very laudable effort. But, I really think you've missed a couple of open goals.

• You need to do more research on Aumeltopia's time in Lazarus. Find out their achievements both as Delegate and military commander. At the moment you're missing a golden opportunity I think.
• More detail required on their time as Delegate of TSP. Trying to tell us that their efforts singlehandely increased their endorsement tally is wrong - we all know it was Drew.
• I would re-order your clauses. Start with the Delegacies, then go onto their Defender work. After that their work in Forest, FNR and NationsStates Today. Finally their graphical work and SC authorship.

At the moment because I believe this is an incomplete bit of research I would not support it. However, as we often say, writing a C&C is a marathon, not a sprint. You have plenty of time to add to this draft and knock off the rough edges.

[Praeceps]

Generally agreeing with BBD's posts.

I would also add that elaboration on what they did as Forest Keeper and Foreign and Culture Minister for Forest would be helpful in addition to the other locations BBD has mentioned.

[North Prarie]

I definitely agree that we need more on Aume's time in Laz and Forest, but there are some roadblocks for each.
One of Somy's most commendable achievements, IMO, is leading the resistance against the Funkadelia coup of Lazarus in July 2017. This was in the rough draft, but we axed it because of it's controversy.
Second - I've contacted multiple Forestians and only one, Turbeaux, has gotten back to me. He actually helped me a lot and put out an open call to all Forestians to contact me, but nobody has reached out to me. All of the Forest stuff is currently based off of my own research, in the Forest history dispatch.

Does anyone have opinions/advice on these?

[Bhang Bhang Duc]

I definitely agree that we need more on Aume's time in Laz and Forest, but there are some roadblocks for each.
One of Somy's most commendable achievements, IMO, is leading the resistance against the Funkadelia coup of Lazarus in July 2017. This was in the rough draft, but we axed it because of it's controversy.
Second - I've contacted multiple Forestians and only one, Turbeaux, has gotten back to me. He actually helped me a lot and put out an open call to all Forestians to contact me, but nobody has reached out to me. All of the Forest stuff is currently based off of my own research, in the Forest history dispatch.

Does anyone have opinions/advice on these?

Leading the resistance to a coup would be highly commendable, wouldn’t it? I dropped out of the game for 18 months round about that time so I don’t know why including it would be controversial.

Can’t advise you about contacts in Forest, don’t know anyone there. Sorry.

[North Prarie]

I definitely agree that we need more on Aume's time in Laz and Forest, but there are some roadblocks for each.
One of Somy's most commendable achievements, IMO, is leading the resistance against the Funkadelia coup of Lazarus in July 2017. This was in the rough draft, but we axed it because of it's controversy.
Second - I've contacted multiple Forestians and only one, Turbeaux, has gotten back to me. He actually helped me a lot and put out an open call to all Forestians to contact me, but nobody has reached out to me. All of the Forest stuff is currently based off of my own research, in the Forest history dispatch.

Does anyone have opinions/advice on these?

Leading the resistance to a coup would be highly commendable, wouldn’t it? I dropped out of the game for 18 months round about that time so I don’t know why including it would be controversial.

Can’t advise you about contacts in Forest, don’t know anyone there. Sorry.

It's widely regarded as a civil war - it wasn't a clear cut abuse of power either way (well, I think it was..)
The coup was also backed by multiple foreign powers and a mention of Somy's efforts could kill it in those regions' minds.