Word count: 544
Probably terrible. Insert BRUH sound effect from South Park here
Condemn Lord Dominator
A resolution to recognise outstanding achievement by a nation or region.Category: CommendationNominee: Lord DominatorProposed by: Tinhampton
THE SECURITY COUNCIL:
CONCERNED about the havoc that [nation=Lord Dominator] - which the omniscient World Census gnomes note is among the 100 worst nations in the world for corruption, charmlessness, and death due to non-natural causes - has wreaked upon the multiverse at large, as shown by the following paragraphs:
- §1: Raiding Activity: In the Black Hawks, Lord Dominator currently serves as a Major and as the Overseer of Talon Corps, a unit dedicated to long-term espionage operations; they have supported occupations of regions such as Cretanja Queendom, ASEAN REGION - which they passworded but refused to refound - Iran, and Westphalia (twice) under the aegis of I Came I Saw I Dominated. They have also taken delegacies by force for Lily on 114 occasions (although this is not apparent in their obnoxiously rainbow-coloured World Factbook Entries which imply that such regions chose to be invaded by them), and have previously deployed multiple satellites to manipulate regional polls for Lily's benefit.
- §2: The World Assembly: Lord Dominator continues to maintain a list of resolutions passed by this Council, no matter how lacklustre or not in keeping with its goal of "international peace and goodwill, by force if necessary" - leading hundreds of confused diplomats into believing that its standards are lower than they actually are and then publishing sloppy first drafts that gain almost zero support. They have also authored (among others) GA#446 "Repeal "Convention on International Oil Spills,"" which nullified well-meaning legislation regarding how member states should deal with oil spills in international waters; and SC#299 "Condemn This Game," a resolution so unseemly and unnecessarily humourous that it was repealed less than a month after its passage.
- §3: International Affairs: Ambassadors from Lord Dominator have often been deployed to World Assembly debates (and - upon behest of then-[region=Forest] Keeper Uan aa Boa for some time - international relations conferences) for the sole purpose of making impolite and extremely undiplomatic statements such as "We need more random purges" and "I know, right? [raspberry noises]". This is not helped by the Deedas' organisation of annual award ceremonies supposedly meant to recognise the most influential raiding and defending entities of the era, which inevitably descend into something vaguely resembling the backpatting of whichever nations and regions manage to stir up the most controversy over that time.
- §4: Speculative Artwork Trading: The Deeda government has invested in over forty pieces of artwork created by its own citizens, at prices occasionally so extortionate that they have become unaffordable to many overseas museums. It also recently acted to greatly reduce the market value of widely-coveted abstract paintings from the nation of Tupelope (which has still not recovered from the incident) by bidding on them at auction at such a rate that fellow Black Hawks could acquire them for free and then sell them at extremely low prices, in what will forever be immortalised as one element of "Operation: Let The Cards Fall."
AFFIRMING that Lord Dominator - in going beyond simply raiding other regions to somehow torment the vast majority of other nations, as shown above - has acted in a manner that is sufficiently dreadful enough to warrant Condemnation:
HEREBY CONDEMNS [nation=Lord Dominator].