[Draft] Video Games Lead to Violins!

[9003]

Title: Video Games Lead to Violins!

The issue: A group of helicopter parents, students, and musicians have come knocking on your door after a recent publication in the highly regarded and respected scientific journal citing that video games have lead to increased Violins.

Option 1
"We at the Parents against Annoying Musical instruments and other annoying sounds watch dog group can not stand for this!" Pipes in a a particularly vocal individual clearing several other reports off your desk. "You must ban Video games right now, this instance! I mean look at this report it clear as day says that playing video games even for 5 minutes a day leads to nearly a 50% increased in violins! These annoying headache causing instruments must be eliminated. The only way is to ban video games!"
Effect:
Video games are now banned

Option 2
"What’s so bad about violins?" asks @@RANDOMNAME@@ the famously obsese musician "Learning to play music is linked to higher success rates in school. I say we dedicate at least an hour a day to video games in our schools so that students are adequately exposed. And to make up for it we can cut gym class because come on really when am I ever going to need to know how to play ‘Cucumber ball’.”
Effect
Many schools have removed their physical education programs and replaced them with video game class.

Option 3
"uhm ..... I don't mean to be rude but I do think that is a small typo in the article." exclaims Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, spreading countless articles with other “small” misspellings on your desk. “Look at these article here ‘Teenage Sax rates at an all time low: How to prevent teenage pregnancy’ Do you really think that Saxophones are reasonable for this? NO these journals can say whatever they want! You need to put your foot down and make it illegal to publish non-peer reviewed and Accredited articles! You should create a department to prevent this from ever happening again!l"
Effect
The Department of Peer Review, Accreditation, and Spell Check has been created.

One thing that got tossed around is that this only works in English and yes that is true however as the preferred language of academia is English I would argue that it still "works" being that someone who does not have a firm grasp on English made the report potential?
At least that's my thoughts and I may be crazy

thank you all so far for the feedback and input

Title: Video Games Lead to Violins!

The issue: A group of concerned parents, professors, and students, and musicians have come knocking on your door after a recent publication in the highly regarded and respected scientific journal citing that video games have lead to increased Violins.

Option 1
"I will not have my little child see or even think about such things!" Screams a particularly vocal parent. "Banning Video games is the only way we can nip this in the butt. What is next! If we let them play violins next thing you know they will pick up harmonicas or worse yet a banjo!"
Effect:
Video games are now banned

Option 2
"Banning video games isn't enough. This developers need to know what I go through on a daily basis" states a professor between handfuls of Head-Ache-B-Gone. "Might I suggest we take all the video game developers and lock them in a room and force them to listen to all nine of Beethoven's symphonies played one of my many want to be musicians."
Effect:
A common torture technique is now to force the subject to listen to classical music

Option 3
"Whats so bad about violins?" asks @@RANDOMNAME@@ the famous musician "Learning to play music is linked to higher success rates in school. I say we dedicate at least an hour a day to video games in our schools so that students are adequately exposed."
Effect
Many schools have removed their physical education programs and replaced them with video game class.

Option 4
"uhm ..... I don't mean to be rude but I do think that is a small typo in the article." exclaims Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@ "It appears that the study links Video games to violence not violins. In fact by the looks of this it was never even peer reviewed at all. You should implement laws preventing this and punish the journal"
Effect
The Department of Peer Review, Accreditation, and Spell Check has been created.

This is a rough draft I know it sounds clunky but I wanted some feedback. Thank you in advance!

[Lelscrep]

I like the fact that as a reader you know it's either a typo or a pun, and at the end it's actually addressed as to why that typo/pun exists. Good job.

I think the speakers could use with some more life, possibly some actions or movements that portray the kind of character you want them each to be?

[Trotterdam]

Why does anyone want to ban violins?

[SherpDaWerp]

Why does anyone want to ban violins?

^ My question. Sure, in the end it turns out to be a typo, but that doesn't change the fact that 3/4 options are from people who genuinely believed that the study said violins were bad.

First option: Parent is introduced who hates music and violins with a burning passion. Why? Some random nutcase came out of the woodwork?

Second option, there's potential for jokes around the speaker being a music professor whose students are rubbish at playing, which I think you might have been going for anyway. That joke either needs to be made more clear, or probably could be added.

Third option - Reasonable. An option where someone asks the other two a question that should have already been answered: why the hell do you hate violins so much.

There's the potential for an issue here around typos in academic papers, possibly satirising anti-vaxxers, music students, or both.

[USS Monitor]

I have mixed feelings about this whole idea, but if you are going to move ahead with it, I'd suggest cutting option 2 entirely. I think 3 options before you get to the punchline is too many.

[The Even Better Usa]

Why does anyone want to ban violins?

i agree, violins aren't the problem. What IS the problem on the other hand is all the sax and drums

[Pangurstan]

*Insert any TwoSetViolin video here*

Why does anyone want to ban violins?

i agree, violins aren't the problem. What IS the problem on the other hand is all the sax and drums

I’m sigging this

The pun is nice, but I think that for option 3, you should pick either music education or allowing video games for the option.

[9003]

Draft 2 is up I loved the Sax pun so I tried to include it hopeful well and I removed the music teacher who has really really bad students but I might swap him in for the concerned parent. The goal is to have the parent be a helicopter parent who thinks everything she reads is true.


Thank you so far for feeback!

Monitor is there a certain part you are wishy washy on?

[Australian rePublic]

Why does anyone want to ban violins?

The noise

[Trotterdam]

Why does anyone want to ban violins?

The noise

Violins are not noisier than other musical instruments.

[Australian rePublic]

The noise

Violins are not noisier than other musical instruments.

D'uh. It's when people start playing those instruments at nausium that it becomes a problem

[SherpDaWerp]

Still doesn't answer my question about why the Option 1's speaker is steaming mad at the idea of their kid learning to play the violin. It's quite a significant part of that option, but it's been entirely left out. They just hate music for some reason? Just add another sentence, or a couple words, explaining why the hell this parent hates music so much.

[Trotterdam]

Just add another sentence, or a couple words, explaining why the hell this parent hates music so much.

I'm afraid that wouldn't be enough. Even if you can explain why this parent hates violins, it wouldn't be a good reason for government action unless it's implied that a lot of other parents feel likewise.

[9003]

Just add another sentence, or a couple words, explaining why the hell this parent hates music so much.

I'm afraid that wouldn't be enough. Even if you can explain why this parent hates violins, it wouldn't be a good reason for government action unless it's implied that a lot of other parents feel likewise.

So somthing along the lines of steaming mad representative of parents against fun things would work better?

I totally agree the government shouldn't listen to just one pissed off helicopter parent I just didn't know how to make it so it was more then one

[Australian rePublic]

Just add another sentence, or a couple words, explaining why the hell this parent hates music so much.

I'm afraid that wouldn't be enough. Even if you can explain why this parent hates violins, it wouldn't be a good reason for government action unless it's implied that a lot of other parents feel likewise.

Some Muslims believe that Certain types of music are prohibited. Maybe there could be a significant Muslim population of the denominations which ban music. Ir maybe, as said earlier, it could be about noise

[USS Monitor]

Monitor is there a certain part you are wishy washy on?

Just the whole idea of an issue built around a silly pun in this way. It's interesting and original, but as an editor, I'm not sure whether I want it or not.

I mean I'm not sure whether it's something that actually belongs in the game, or just something we chuckle at on the forum.

[Bears Armed]

Why does anyone want to ban violins?

catgut strings

[Authoritaria-Imperia]

[…] why the Option 1's speaker is steaming mad at the idea of their kid learning to play the violin. […] They just hate music for some reason?

There's a Coco reference in there somewhere…

(The Disney movie Coco. The main character's mom absolutely HATES music.)

[Trotterdam]

Why does anyone want to ban violins?

catgut strings

Not all violins have those. Debate on that would center on animal welfare activists wanting to ban them in favor of other string materials such as steel or nylon, versus musicians insisting that authentic catgut strings have better/more traditional acoustics that synthetic imitations can't quite replicate. Nobody would try to ban violins entirely over this.

[Bears Armed]

catgut strings

Not all violins have those. Debate on that would center on animal welfare activists wanting to ban them in favor of other string materials such as steel or nylon, versus musicians insisting that authentic catgut strings have better/more traditional acoustics that synthetic imitations can't quite replicate. Nobody would try to ban violins entirely over this.

But the very existence of violins today reminds people that they used to have these: Every appearance or even mention of them is a micro-aggression against 'ethical vegans' and animal-lovers...

[Pangurstan]

Not all violins have those. Debate on that would center on animal welfare activists wanting to ban them in favor of other string materials such as steel or nylon, versus musicians insisting that authentic catgut strings have better/more traditional acoustics that synthetic imitations can't quite replicate. Nobody would try to ban violins entirely over this.

But the very existence of violins today reminds people that they used to have these: Every appearance or even mention of them is a micro-aggression against 'ethical vegans' and animal-lovers...

Stringed instruments still use glue made from animal hides.

[Australian rePublic]

All of this works on the assumption that @@NAME@@ speaks English. This wouldn't work with any other language

[9003]

New draft is up addressing
both the government shouldn't listen to one crazy wack job and the English potential if you have another idea for either please share!

[Candlewhisper Archive]

I can see how "violins" sounds like "violence", but it's not really likely as a typo in a written publication.

[Australian rePublic]

I can see how "violins" sounds like "violence", but it's not really likely as a typo in a written publication.

The scribe misheard.