Presents...
The Lacrosse Lamentations
with Aisling Keane
Guys, can I say something right now that I have just realized? Don't get all blown back and everything by what I'm about to say, all right? I mean, feel free to be surprised, sure, but I don't know about reacting any more than that. All right, is everybody sitting down? Everyone? Okay, good. Here goes nothing. We may not be doing so poorly in lacrosse after all.
All right, guys, just hear me out for one moment, will you? I know that I have already sung laments about the death of Fleftic lacrosse in earlier editions of my little corner of the Internet, but I can't always be right, right? Even if I am a girl and am always right, I sometimes am not actually right. Right? But back to the topic at hand. I have said that we have left behind the Golden Age of Fleftic Lacrosse™, remember? But in doing so we have not changed much, only that we finally now allow men into our lacrosse team. Well, our friends, rivals, and partners in rising through the lacrosse ranks Banija have just completely demolished their own lacrosse structure in an attempt to rebuild from the ground up.
Say what? Banija, tear down their entire lacrosse program? Now that's a bit drastic, isn't it? I don't recall myself ever having called for the restructuring of the whole of Lacrosse Abanhfleft even despite the slow and steady decline of the team from the dizzying heights of World Lacrosse Championships 25. And Lacrosse Abanhfleft themselves have admitted that we as a national team are in the decline and that we are definitely undertaking a rebuilding project for at least the next decade. But we have most definitely not taken the drastic steps that Banija did.
What are those drastic steps that Banija took in order to restructure their lacrosse, you may ask? Well, for one thing, every player and staff member who was on the Banijan team during WLC 28 and WLC 29 have not been called up to the team anymore. They weren't outright rejected or even ejected, but their names are no longer being spoken of in the halls of Banijan lacrosse. It's as if they no longer existed. All right, maybe I'm exaggerating about the "not mentioning their names" part, but the rest of it is true. Banija pride themselves in being an international lacrosse power, and I have to say that they have the pedigree to back up those claims. But when you've hosted the biggest lacrosse competition in the multiverse twice (twice!) and can only muster a Round of 16 exit as your best performance on home soil with arguably one of the best teams on paper, what else is there left to do? Apparently for Banija, it's "Get rid of everything and start fresh".
In a way, it's ironic. (Wait a minute, is "ironic" the right word to use in this situation? Damn you, Alanis Morrisette, for forever ruining the word "ironic" for me!) We, Abanhfleft are supposed to be the ones in decline and embarking on a rebuilding program while Banija goes on the ascendancy and takes advantage of the power vacuum and fills in the void left behind by the Fearsome Threesome. And yet the Fleftic machine continues to hum quietly along, the transition in the process of gelling together while Banija have thrown everything out with the trash and hope that what they have thrown together for the 30th edition of the WLC will be enough to keep them high up in the rankings while they start their own rebuilding process.
Say goodbye to the likes of Kizza Kenyatta, Marques Jacobson, and Marko Babic Jr. We are most probably not going to see them again. Say hello to the likes of Yoro Touray, Momodou Ndiaye, and Kekuta Sanneh, for they are the new faces of Banijan lacrosse. And strangely enough, it all seems so fitting. Abanhfleft and Banija have always been the great lacrosse rivals of recent years. It may not be as big as it used to be, but all this makes me feel as if our two countries' lacrosse programs are as intertwined as the lives of Harry Potter and Lord Voldemort. But thankfully there's no need for any killing or this "neither can live while the other survives" nonsense; all that's happened is a big renewal for both teams. The only difference between them is the manner in which they were renewed. Abanhfleft did it slowly, carefully, and with a plan; while Banija did it quickly, suddenly, and with a hope that they can keep themselves afloat until they come up with a plan of their own.
But no matter your feelings (or mine) about Banija, this is something that actually makes me happy. Rivals aren't supposed to be there only to be beaten; they are also there to help us improve, and we also help them to improve too. Abanhfleft vs Banija Part One has come to an end; long live Abanhfleft vs Banija Part Two. Hope you're ready for this newer, wilder ride.