[draft] COMMEND VILITA

[Indusse]

Admiring the healthy competition, spirit, sportspersonship and interest
in nationstates community that can promote well-organized sporting event ,

Noting with approval vilita's vast sporting successes which includes four World Cup titles , two Atlantian Oceania Confederation of Association Football (AOCAF) Cups, being runners up in AOCAF for 6 times.

Observing the World Cup Committee (WCC) — a body of nations that manages and organizes the biggest and most prestigious international sporting events in NationStates:
• NationStates World Cup (WC),
• The Baptism of Fire (BOF)
• The Cup of Harmony(COH)

Celebrating the nominee for being a prominent WCC member — at the time of this writing — contested in the élections for electing the World Cup Committee president and vice president at time of WC 81 and won that WorldCup ,

Recognizing that vilita created the current all time world cup winning region and best sports region of nationstates " ATLANTIAN OCEANIA"(AO) and played a major role in the development of sports.

Bearing in mind that vilita hosted many prestigious sports events and also won with another account vilita & turori.

Understanding vilita`s interest in nationstates events and securing top 10 positions in Z-Days 7 , trading cards , nuclear option, bytecoin events.

Being, one of the oldest members of nationstates(2004) and a very active member of NS sports.

Hereby Commends Vilita.

[Indusse]

needs opinions. ...

[Kostrorleauny]

Aye there!

So this is a commendation proposal yes? Right, so... I would recommend adding a bit more substance in here. So far, I get the gist - Vilita seems to be an elder nation that’s taken a particular interest in NationStates sports. What you’re going to want to do in order to draft a successful commendation is then proceed to relate it back to how Vilita’s actions are admirable/commendable/etc.

Currently, I’m not really seeing this flow... unfortunately. If you’d like, I’d be happy to help should you wish to telegram me and we can work on certain clauses together? What you’ll be wanting to do here is to paint a clear, comprehensive, picture of why Vilita should be recognized by the World Assembly with commendation distinction for their actions. The clauses herein in your draft need to mirror that, I’d think.

[Indusse]

Aye there!

So this is a commendation proposal yes? Right, so... I would recommend adding a bit more substance in here. So far, I get the gist - Vilita seems to be an elder nation that’s taken a particular interest in NationStates sports. What you’re going to want to do in order to draft a successful commendation is then proceed to relate it back to how Vilita’s actions are admirable/commendable/etc.

Currently, I’m not really seeing this flow... unfortunately. If you’d like, I’d be happy to help should you wish to telegram me and we can work on certain clauses together? What you’ll be wanting to do here is to paint a clear, comprehensive, picture of why Vilita should be recognized by the World Assembly with commendation distinction for their actions. The clauses herein in your draft need to mirror that, I’d think.

so can u help me.

[Kostrorleauny]

Aye there!

So this is a commendation proposal yes? Right, so... I would recommend adding a bit more substance in here. So far, I get the gist - Vilita seems to be an elder nation that’s taken a particular interest in NationStates sports. What you’re going to want to do in order to draft a successful commendation is then proceed to relate it back to how Vilita’s actions are admirable/commendable/etc.

Currently, I’m not really seeing this flow... unfortunately. If you’d like, I’d be happy to help should you wish to telegram me and we can work on certain clauses together? What you’ll be wanting to do here is to paint a clear, comprehensive, picture of why Vilita should be recognized by the World Assembly with commendation distinction for their actions. The clauses herein in your draft need to mirror that, I’d think.

so can u help me.

Telegrammed.

Will post suggestions if any here for others to comment on.

[USS Monitor]

Vilita is a pretty cool guy. He doesn't afraid of anything. But you should clean up your grammar and clear up the stuff like "another account" that refer to the game rather than being IC.

Probably would be best to redo this as "Commend Vilita and Turori" so that it is easier to include different parts of his creations without talking about a player controlling multiple accounts. If it's "Commend Vilita" then it becomes awkward to explain why you're talking about stuff Turori did.

[Indusse]

Vilita is a pretty cool guy. He doesn't afraid of anything. But you should clean up your grammar and clear up the stuff like "another account" that refer to the game rather than being IC.

Probably would be best to redo this as "Commend Vilita and Turori" so that it is easier to include different parts of his creations without talking about a player controlling multiple accounts. If it's "Commend Vilita" then it becomes awkward to explain why you're talking about stuff Turori did.

I Will remove turori

[Kostrorleauny]

Vilita is a pretty cool guy. He doesn't afraid of anything. But you should clean up your grammar and clear up the stuff like "another account" that refer to the game rather than being IC.

Probably would be best to redo this as "Commend Vilita and Turori" so that it is easier to include different parts of his creations without talking about a player controlling multiple accounts. If it's "Commend Vilita" then it becomes awkward to explain why you're talking about stuff Turori did.

Couldn’t have said it better myself, yes. This. ^^^

Will go over things such as this with them over telegram, since they wished for me to assist.

[USS Monitor]

Vilita is a pretty cool guy. He doesn't afraid of anything. But you should clean up your grammar and clear up the stuff like "another account" that refer to the game rather than being IC.

Probably would be best to redo this as "Commend Vilita and Turori" so that it is easier to include different parts of his creations without talking about a player controlling multiple accounts. If it's "Commend Vilita" then it becomes awkward to explain why you're talking about stuff Turori did.

I Will remove turori

That's not what I was suggesting, though...

[Indusse]

you are a moderator so can u look @ comlend kuriko draft too.

[USS Monitor]

you are a moderator so can u look @ comlend kuriko draft too.

SC is not my specialty as a mod. I am posting in this thread because I know Vilita.

[Indusse]

ok thanx

[Vangaziland]

It needs a few more details, but it's a nice idea. You also accidentally called AO the best sports region.

But details such as how long AO has been active, for example.

[Indusse]

It needs a few more details, but it's a nice idea. You also accidentally called AO the best sports region.

But details such as how long AO has been active, for example.

oops but its the biggest sports region

[Tinhampton]

Rule 2a. Compare with SC#40 "Commend Starblaydia".

[Falcania]

It needs a few more details, but it's a nice idea. You also accidentally called AO the best sports region.

But details such as how long AO has been active, for example.

Okay, but let's face facts here, AO absolutely is the best sports region

As the WA delegate of AO I should probably keep an eye on this. I appreciate the sentiment but there's some shaping up to do.

[Indusse]

Rule 2a. Compare with SC#40 "Commend Starblaydia".

Ill change that

[Lamoni]

As a former AO member myself, I would highly suggest that you ask Vilitia and other AO members for more information to include in your commendation of Vilita. At a minimum, this draft would need more commend-worthy acts included in it, as well as better formatting.

[Falcania]

oh hey I remember Lamoni, long time no war

[Kakastania]

Vilita should be capitalized. Am I right?

[Tinhampton]

Vilita should be capitalized. Am I right?

No. That is Indusse's house style for SC proposal thread titles.

[Vangaziland]

Maybe I should write it. If I can use my writing skill to ride Vilita to a profile badge, then I'll support him.

[Indusse]

Anyone can help me

[Borovan3]

Anyone can help me

Ask people who know or role played with him. It's not a sprint. You haven't really edit until you come back later next night and know something to fix.

[Vangaziland]

Anyone can help me

I want to help by writing it for you and taking the credit.

Just kidding. I don't have anywhere near enough time.