[SILLY] GA Joke Proposals Only

[The Sakhalinsk Empire]

In mundo Conventus,

Voyant que de nombreux pays membres utilisent des langues et des dialectes différents,

加盟国間の多文化主義を推進するため、

Wygląda na to, że zupełnie nowy język zajęłby wiele lat, aby ludzie mogli opanować, tworząc w ten sposób więcej konfliktów,

HEREBY:

1. Nag-uutos na ang lahat ng miyembro ng bansa ay may kasamang hindi bababa sa 5 iba't ibang mga wika sa lahat ng mga teksto na mas mahaba sa 10 salita.

2. Налагает штраф и аудит на государства-члены, которые отказываются соблюдать, что может привести к оккупации Всемирной Ассамблеи.

--------------

Inhlanhla inqumle oku, uya kuyidinga.

[Bears Armed]

This was actually submitted, and has already been discarded, but I thought that it was worth keeping a copy here:

Put Cameras In Our Milk
A resolution to improve world security by boosting police and military budgets.

Category: International Security
Strength: Mild
Proposed by: Mild-mannered Anarchists

Together, we can reduce breakfast time homicide on a global scale by putting cameras in our milk. Sure, the cost of milk may dramatically increase, but with it will come new opportunities for employment! We can call these people the Milk Watchers. Also, while costly in production, these creamy cameras will be cost efficient in the long run; they can safely pass through the digestive tract, and then be recollected and reused! What's more important, your citizens or your dairy industry?


Approvals: 1 (Mild-mannered Anarchists)

GenSec Status: ILLEGAL — DISCARDED

Info
Discard (2): Bananaistan, Bears Armed
2 minutes ago: Bears Armed: Discard
2 minutes ago: Bears Armed: Illegal — Joke Proposal. (GOOD joke, I admit... ^_^). There's a thread for these in the GA forum, I'll re-post this one there so that can be remembered.
3 hours ago: Bananaistan: Discard
3 hours ago: Bananaistan: Illegal — Joke proposals (the GA proposal queue is not the place for jokes)

Status: Lacking Support (requires 84 more approvals)
Voting Ends: in 3 days 3 hours

[The Galactic Liberal Democracy]

A bill give free v bucks from government

Fortnite good and original
PUBG bad and knockoff
I need v bucks because no defaultys
I will take more dubs
Fartnite greatest because more players
Hereby, provide state funding for all fortnite players

[Liberimery]

This was actually submitted, and has already been discarded, but I thought that it was worth keeping a copy here:

Put Cameras In Our Milk
A resolution to improve world security by boosting police and military budgets.

Category: International Security
Strength: Mild
Proposed by: Mild-mannered Anarchists

Together, we can reduce breakfast time homicide on a global scale by putting cameras in our milk. Sure, the cost of milk may dramatically increase, but with it will come new opportunities for employment! We can call these people the Milk Watchers. Also, while costly in production, these creamy cameras will be cost efficient in the long run; they can safely pass through the digestive tract, and then be recollected and reused! What's more important, your citizens or your dairy industry?


Approvals: 1 (Mild-mannered Anarchists)

GenSec Status: ILLEGAL — DISCARDED

Info
Discard (2): Bananaistan, Bears Armed
2 minutes ago: Bears Armed: Discard
2 minutes ago: Bears Armed: Illegal — Joke Proposal. (GOOD joke, I admit... ^_^). There's a thread for these in the GA forum, I'll re-post this one there so that can be remembered.
3 hours ago: Bananaistan: Discard
3 hours ago: Bananaistan: Illegal — Joke proposals (the GA proposal queue is not the place for jokes)

Status: Lacking Support (requires 84 more approvals)
Voting Ends: in 3 days 3 hours

I had a gag challenge a page back to this. Basically boiled down to a joke about "Serial Murder" is not part of a balanced breakfast.

[Bears Armed]

This was actually submitted, and has already been discarded, but I thought that it was worth keeping a copy here:

Put Cameras In Our Milk

A resolution to improve world security by boosting police and military budgets.

Category: International Security
Strength: Mild
Proposed by: Mild-mannered Anarchists

Together, we can reduce breakfast time homicide on a global scale by putting cameras in our milk. Sure, the cost of milk may dramatically increase, but with it will come new opportunities for employment! We can call these people the Milk Watchers. Also, while costly in production, these creamy cameras will be cost efficient in the long run; they can safely pass through the digestive tract, and then be recollected and reused! What's more important, your citizens or your dairy industry?


Approvals: 1 (Mild-mannered Anarchists)

GenSec Status: ILLEGAL — DISCARDED

Info
Discard (2): Bananaistan, Bears Armed
2 minutes ago: Bears Armed: Discard
2 minutes ago: Bears Armed: Illegal — Joke Proposal. (GOOD joke, I admit... ^_^). There's a thread for these in the GA forum, I'll re-post this one there so that can be remembered.
3 hours ago: Bananaistan: Discard
3 hours ago: Bananaistan: Illegal — Joke proposals (the GA proposal queue is not the place for jokes)

Status: Lacking Support (requires 84 more approvals)
Voting Ends: in 3 days 3 hours

I had a gag challenge a page back to this. Basically boiled down to a joke about "Serial Murder" is not part of a balanced breakfast.

So you did; I don't know how i missed it earlier.

[Demiurges]

I had a gag challenge a page back to this. Basically boiled down to a joke about "Serial Murder" is not part of a balanced breakfast.

So you did; I don't know how i missed it earlier.

I feel like this proposal has promise, except we should NOT be putting the cameras in the milk. Milk is sometimes heated or put in hot beverages and foods that would cause equipment failure. Put the cameras inside the actual serial- I mean cereal instead!

[Jutsa]

just read the breakfast time homicide one...

[Goverwal]

The World Assembly,
Spending billions each year on window repair bills,
Noting the shards of glass scattered across the floor of the WA chambers,
Alarmed by the excruciating pain caused by standing upon one of these,
Concerned by the dangers of wet floors on the path between the Vastivan Memorial Reflecting Pool (VMRP) and the WA chambers,

Places the world's largest heated towel-rail next to the VMRP;
Requires all ambassadors to be naked, so that they can dry themselves more quickly,
Prohibits the defenestration of ambassadors without opening the ******* window first!

[Imperium Anglorum]

Just install instant-window openers.

[Sierra Lyricalia]

Requires all ambassadors to be naked, so that they can dry themselves more quickly,

Leo takes another sip of tequila and suddenly straightens up with a beaming smile plastered across his face. "Done and done, sir! A capital idea! Now how did I get this damned necktie tied to infernally tight without strangling myself, I wonder... Truly a miracle among... Ah! that's got it. Now then, as I was saying, a fantastic plan, this. Back home it's all 'think of the children' this, and 'hairy old man nipples' that, and 'dangling, wrinkled scro-'"

"WRONG!" Steph shouts suddenly. "Nope! Incorrect! Failure of reasoning and legality! This right here is not happening! This provision of the proposal is illegal for contradiction of GAR #7, GAR #9, possibly GAR #22, and maybe #242 depending on how recently you've showered. Button your godsdamn shirt back up, spaceman, you're not on shore leave! Nobody wants to hear about your Holy Republic underground swingers' convention! Yes, the tie too, please!"

Steph glares around the room, her ice-grey eyes practically sparking. "No more encouraging him, you hear me?" The chamber door slams behind her as she exits.

"Joyless wench," Leo mutters under his breath.

[Imperium Anglorum]

Requires all ambassadors to be naked, so that they can dry themselves more quickly,

Leo takes another sip of tequila and suddenly straightens up with a beaming smile plastered across his face. "Done and done, sir! A capital idea! Now how did I get this damned necktie tied to infernally tight without strangling myself, I wonder... Truly a miracle among... Ah! that's got it. Now then, as I was saying, a fantastic plan, this. Back home it's all 'think of the children' this, and 'hairy old man nipples' that, and 'dangling, wrinkled scro-'"

"WRONG!" Steph shouts suddenly. "Nope! Incorrect! Failure of reasoning and legality! This right here is not happening! This provision of the proposal is illegal for contradiction of GAR #7, GAR #9, possibly GAR #22, and maybe #242 depending on how recently you've showered. Button your godsdamn shirt back up, spaceman, you're not on shore leave! Nobody wants to hear about your Holy Republic underground swingers' convention! Yes, the tie too, please!"

Steph glares around the room, her ice-grey eyes practically sparking. "No more encouraging him, you hear me?" The chamber door slams behind her as she exits.

"Joyless wench," Leo mutters under his breath.

I can still shut down a party
I can hang with anybody
I can drink whiskey and red wine
Little Scotch on the rocks and I'm fine, I'm fine

But when I taste tequila, baby I still see ya...

[Democratic Empire of Romania]

The World Assembly:

Aware that foxes are cute and cuddly;

Appalled that these innocent creatures are being killed for entertainment;

Recognising that foxes are often friends with dragons, which are big, And scary. And breathe fire;

Hereby

1. Defines the fox as any member of the genus Vulpes;

2. Prohibits the purposeful harming of any fox, including, but not limited to: murder, torture, and eating;

3. Affirms the right for nations to do as they please with foxes that have died of natural causes.

11/10 For

[Liberlitatia]

Dihydrogen Monoxide Prevention Act

Category: Environmental
Strength: Strong

The World Assembly,

Realizing the emerging threat of Dihydrogen Monoxide,

Defines:

1. Dihydrogen monoxide as having many threats (stated below)
2. It is a major component of acid rain
3. It is deadly if inhaled, even in small quantities
4. Touching vapors can cause burns up to the third degree
5. Continous contact in solid form can cause need for amputation
6. It is a greenhouse gas
7. It is found in every river, lake, and ocean
8. It corrodes metals
9. It can cause significant erosion
10. Massive exposures of Dihydrogen Monoxide can destroy structures

Creating a World Assembly Dihydrogen Monoxide Prevention Force (WADMPF),

Declaring that when the WADMPF finds a stockpile of Dihydrogen Monoxide, members of the WADMPF enter the stockpile and ingest all traces of said stockpile,

Bans all Dihydrogen Monoxide,

Mandates:

1. Dihydrogen Monoxide is from herefore illegal
2. All traders of Dihydrogen Monoxide shall be executed on the spot

Decides to continously say “Meep”.

[Astoriya]

Repeal GA #7

[Alamka]

Make everything Alamkan



Hereby realizes Alamka is the bestest nayshon evah!!!!!111!!




Rating: Infinnitee!1111!! (BESTEST RANKING)

Startoos: Bestest Leegal Propozel!111!!1111!1 Aprooved by: MAGIC WIZURD OF JENEROL ASSIMBLAY

[Outer Sparta]

Install a WA Pool

Category: Political Stability
Strength: Strong
Proposed by: Outer Sparta

Noting that WA members and delegates work hard to no end making (and remaking, repealing) legislation while being attacked by own members over a comma placement,

Maintaining that leisure time is needed for everyone to enjoy breaks and time off of stressful WA meetings,

Proposes:
1. A large swimming pool to be installed in the World Assembly's headquarters
2. Pool toys and designed areas for lap swimming

Asserting that a pool would help members take meaningful time off and have a little fun once in a while.

Requiring all members to have fun in the WA pool.

Also, who wouldn't want to see your favorite resolution writer such as Imperium Anglorum in a bathing suit?

[Dirty Americans]

Requires all ambassadors to be naked, so that they can dry themselves more quickly,

Careful about this, you might bring the WerePenguins back into the WA.

[Dirty Americans]

The Hydrogen Hydroxide Seasonal Awareness Act

Category: Education and Creativity
Area of Effect: Education
Proposed by: Dirty Americans

Realizing that the common molecule of hydrogen and oxygen (HHO) plays an important role in the ecology of the nations of the World Assembly;

Appreciating the common use of the more traditional name for the molecule as Dihydrogen Monoxide as indicative of the oxidation of the hydrogen molecule;

Insisting, however, on the ionization properties of the molecule into a hydrogen ion and a hydroxide ion represented by H+ OH- (which can also be represented as HO-);

Recognizing the importance of the term “ho” especially in combinations of three during the last month of the calendar year;

Encourages all member nations to refer to Dihydrogen Monoxide as Hydrogen Hydroxide during the last month of the calendar year, along with the prefix “Merry” throughout the member nation’s educational systems and institutions of higher learning.

[Nintendo Switch Parental Controls]

Esteemed Colleagues;

We have come so far as the WA, to bring peace and order to the world. However, we have not done our job well enough. The WA is being abused to unnecessary proportions, these are only a few of the many problems:

1. The New Pacific Order trying to take over the world with WA endorsements
2. The Black Hawks.
3. Raiding in general.
4. Non-WA nations outnumber WA nations seven to one.
5. The endorsement system.

With these problems, I believe that we should disassemble the World Assembly and make NationStates great again!

Hereby repeals General Assembly Resolution #1: The World Assembly.

[United Soviet States of Finland]

The Banning Of Imagery, Photography, And Spreading Rumors Of Santa Claus

Category: Moral Decency
Strength: Strong
Proposed by: United Soviet States of Finland

Realizing that Santa Claus is a lie that parents tell children since the moment they are born, leaving permanent scars to some children.

Noting that the truth will be hard on any child to swallow since the most trusted source of information to the child are their parental figures. Telling the child that their parental figures lied to them will leave the children with trust issues.

Insisting all nations worldwide to ban imagery and photography depicting the fictional figure of Santa Claus for promoting a lie to masses of easily susceptible children.

Denying that poor wording or Santa Claus bringing happiness to the world is real.

Wishing for all religions everywhere to adapt Satan Claus as a new source of evil.

Definitions of "Santa Claus"
A Santa Claus is to be defined as an individual dressed in a red coat with a white fur trim and a red nightcap.
A Santa Claus is to be defined also as chassis with a processor, monitor, disk drive(s) and operating system.
A Santa Claus is to be defined also as a picture creating a feeling of depression by showing the worst parts of your nation.

"It doesn't have to make coherent sense as long as it works"

[Gurori]

Repeal "The Banning Of Imagery, Photography, And Spreading Rumors Of Santa Claus"

Category: The Truth
Strength: INFINITE
Proposed By: The Grand Empire of Gurori

Rectifying that Santa Claus IS in-fact real.

Warning that without Santa Claus, Christmas Spirit will decrease a thousandfold.

Reminding that Santa Claus is not responsible for possessions and/or deaths caused by children misspelling "Santa" as "Satan" on their Christmas letters.

[Wallenburg]

On the First Day of Christmas

---

---

Category: Education and Creativity || Area of Effect: Cultural Heritage || Proposed by: Wallenburg

---

Recognizing the power of Christmas cheer in solving international dilemmas,

Certain that Santa will leave presents for all the good ambassadors,

Resolving to fight the war on Christmas,

On the first day of Christmas, the World Assembly does decree that each member state shall receive:

• IA's secret telegram key.

[The Candy Of Bottles]

On the First Day of Christmas

---

(Image)

---

Category: Education and Creativity || Area of Effect: Cultural Heritage || Proposed by: Wallenburg

---

Recognizing the power of Christmas cheer in solving international dilemmas,

Certain that Santa will leave presents for all the good ambassadors,

Resolving to fight the war on Christmas,

On the first day of Christmas, the World Assembly does decree that each member state shall receive:

• IA's secret telegram key.

Oh, just a bit early there- the first day is the 25th, not the 24th. If you were in Europe it would probably work by now, but your forum profile says you're in California.

[Wrapper]

On the Second Day of Christmas

---

---

Category: Education and Creativity || Area of Effect: Cultural Heritage || Proposed by: Wrapper

---

Recognizing the power of Christmas cheer in solving international dilemmas,

Certain that Santa will leave presents for all the good ambassadors,

Resolving to fight the war on Christmas,

On the second day of Christmas, the World Assembly does decree that each member state shall receive:

• two Orange Juliuses;
  
• and IA's secret telegram key.

[Wallenburg]

On the First Day of Christmas

---

(Image)

---

Category: Education and Creativity || Area of Effect: Cultural Heritage || Proposed by: Wallenburg

---

Recognizing the power of Christmas cheer in solving international dilemmas,

Certain that Santa will leave presents for all the good ambassadors,

Resolving to fight the war on Christmas,

On the first day of Christmas, the World Assembly does decree that each member state shall receive:

• IA's secret telegram key.

Oh, just a bit early there- the first day is the 25th, not the 24th. If you were in Europe it would probably work by now, but your forum profile says you're in California.

Going by UTC.