The Infinites:The Lamest Heroes -Comedy, Supers - OOC/Closed

[What Has Been Lost]

Name: Mariah Crack
Codename: Tabletop
Age: 17
Sex: female
Appearance:

Biography: Mariah was born into a poor family with no siblings. She was born with the unusual power to become a table. She would write little comic strips for herself about becoming a hero, but there isn't exactly a place in this world for a table-shifter. Eventually she trashed the comics, about when she turned 10.
At 14 her family became bankrupt, so Mariah robbed a bank for a tiny amount of cash. She had to admit, it was pretty clever of herself to turn into a doll table when they inspected for a robber. They never found her under the safe!
She later made stealing a habit, only grabbing what they needed at the time. She is currently looking for a villain to hire her. In her opinion, she is more of a sidekick character.
Powers: Can turn into a table. Seriously. Any kind. If said table breaks, she will return to human form with no injury other than a headache. ("You want a stupid power? You've got one!")

---

Describe your abilities: "I can turn into any kind of table. Stone, wood, big, small, any. If I break in table form, I automatically return as a human with a serious whopper of a headache."
Why did you turn to crime: "My family went broke. I only steal small stuff anyway."
Why did you further become a supervillain: "Boredom, plain and simple. And supervillain might be stretching it; villain's apprentice, maybe."
How do you feel about the Infinites: "They're... Um... I don't know. I'm not that scared of them. I doubt they will kill me or anything... They won't... right?"
What's your end goal: "To stop living in poverty. Maybe even get in a scuffle with some "Heroes"."
You've captured the hero/heroine, what happens now: "Why would I do that? Oh, might keep them around for conversation."
Do you plan out your monologues or do they just sort of happen: "They just sort of happen, but I keep some good catch phrases in mind."
Let's hear a sample of your evil laugh (the noise you'd make when your plan is succeeding): "Ha. Not so tough now, eh?"
Let's hear a sample of your evil roar (the noise you make when your plan is failing): "Rats!"
Any lines you won't cross: "I will never kill. Ever. I prefer not to harm, but whatever happens happens..."
Would you prefer an archenemy, or would you rather just drift around from rogues gallery to rogues gallery: "Again, whatever happens happens. Although I would prefer to be able to sleep soundly... do I need to lock my door?"

[Talchyon]

Name: Mariah Crack
Codename: Tabletop
Age: 17
Sex: female
Appearance:

(Image)

Biography: Mariah was born into a poor family with no siblings. She was born with the unusual power to become a table. She would write little comic strips for herself about becoming a hero, but there isn't exactly a place in this world for a table-shifter. Eventually she trashed the comics, about when she turned 10.
At 14 her family became bankrupt, so Mariah robbed a bank for a tiny amount of cash. She had to admit, it was pretty clever of herself to turn into a doll table when they inspected for a robber. They never found her under the safe!
She later made stealing a habit, only grabbing what they needed at the time. She is currently looking for a villain to hire her. In her opinion, she is more of a sidekick character.
Powers: Can turn into a table. Seriously. Any kind. If said table breaks, she will return to human form with no injury other than a headache. ("You want a stupid power? You've got one!")

---

Describe your abilities: "I can turn into any kind of table. Stone, wood, big, small, any. If I break in table form, I automatically return as a human with a serious whopper of a headache."
Why did you turn to crime: "My family went broke. I only steal small stuff anyway."
Why did you further become a supervillain: "Boredom, plain and simple. And supervillain might be stretching it; villain's apprentice, maybe."
How do you feel about the Infinites: "They're... Um... I don't know. I'm not that scared of them. I doubt they will kill me or anything... They won't... right?"
What's your end goal: "To stop living in poverty. Maybe even get in a scuffle with some "Heroes"."
You've captured the hero/heroine, what happens now: "Why would I do that? Oh, might keep them around for conversation."
Do you plan out your monologues or do they just sort of happen: "They just sort of happen, but I keep some good catch phrases in mind."
Let's hear a sample of your evil laugh (the noise you'd make when your plan is succeeding): "Ha. Not so tough now, eh?"
Let's hear a sample of your evil roar (the noise you make when your plan is failing): "Rats!"
Any lines you won't cross: "I will never kill. Ever. I prefer not to harm, but whatever happens happens..."
Would you prefer an archenemy, or would you rather just drift around from rogues gallery to rogues gallery: "Again, whatever happens happens. Although I would prefer to be able to sleep soundly... do I need to lock my door?"

Haha! Excellent. Welcome to the INFINITES! Your character will begin at the villains' meeting.

-Talc

[Harkback Union]

Name: Kaptain Salzesser
Codename: Herr Salz
Age: 33
Sex: Male
Appearance:

This but with an evil smile...
Biography:

Born a century ago in a militaristic society into a family of rural salt miners. He studied at the imperial military academy and enlisted in the army to fight for his country. One day, while eating his lunch at the mess hall, Salzesser found his goulash to be lacking in salt. He thus took the salt cup assigned to his table and poured some salt on the soup. Unfortunately, he dropped the cup into the hot soup by accident and its contents dissolved amidst his meal. Since the kaptain was really hungry, he decided to eat the soup anyway, and to his surprise, it tasted good, really good. The next day, he used even more salt on his smoked würsts, and even salted the bread that came with the tasty sausages. Eventually, he developed a habit of adding increasingly large amounts of salt to his meals each day...

He kicked out of the officer core stealing all the salt cups from the canteen for private use (and even the ones from the officer's lounge) and was demoted all the way to a lowly private. As additional punishment, he was enlisted in a dangerous experiment secretly run in utmost secrecy at a secret mountain base, in which Private Salzesser and 2 other ex - officers, Hans Pfeffer and Origano Moretti (aka, Il divoratore di tutti Origano) were to be first to test a mysterious machine that was bound to win the war for the Empire.

However, the experiment didn't go exactly as planned. Salzesser and his fellow lab rats were told that they would soon find themselves 1 minute in the past, instead they arrived almost a century in the future in downtown Orient without any warning.


Powers:

---

Describe your abilities: Can safely and with great haste consume industrial quantities of Salt.
Why did you turn to crime: For more salt.
Why did you further become a supervillain: Rising to the rank of supervillain is in the works.
How do you feel about the Infinites: Don't really car about them.
What's your end goal: Steal more salt I guess. Also other spices.
You've captured the hero/heroine, what happens now: Torture them by forcing a spoonful of spice down their throat.
Do you plan out your monologues or do they just sort of happen: Of course I don't!
Let's hear a sample of your evil laugh (the noise you'd make when your plan is succeeding):
- "MU... ahem... cough... MUHAHAHAHAAA, WUNDERBAR!"
Let's hear a sample of your evil roar (the noise you make when your plan is failing):
- "...Nein... NEEIIIN!"
Any lines you won't cross: Front lines.
Would you prefer an archenemy, or would you rather just drift around from rogues gallery to rogues gallery: Drifting sounds fun!

[Mirigli]

Are new people still being accepted?

[Talchyon]

Name: Kaptain Salzesser
Codename: Herr Salz
Age: 33
Sex: Male
Appearance:

(Image)

This but with an evil smile...
Biography:

Born a century ago in a militaristic society into a family of rural salt miners. He studied at the imperial military academy and enlisted in the army to fight for his country. One day, while eating his lunch at the mess hall, Salzesser found his goulash to be lacking in salt. He thus took the salt cup assigned to his table and poured some salt on the soup. Unfortunately, he dropped the cup into the hot soup by accident and its contents dissolved amidst his meal. Since the kaptain was really hungry, he decided to eat the soup anyway, and to his surprise, it tasted good, really good. The next day, he used even more salt on his smoked würsts, and even salted the bread that came with the tasty sausages. Eventually, he developed a habit of adding increasingly large amounts of salt to his meals each day...

He kicked out of the officer core stealing all the salt cups from the canteen for private use (and even the ones from the officer's lounge) and was demoted all the way to a lowly private. As additional punishment, he was enlisted in a dangerous experiment secretly run in utmost secrecy at a secret mountain base, in which Private Salzesser and 2 other ex - officers, Hans Pfeffer and Origano Moretti (aka, Il divoratore di tutti Origano) were to be first to test a mysterious machine that was bound to win the war for the Empire.

However, the experiment didn't go exactly as planned. Salzesser and his fellow lab rats were told that they would soon find themselves 1 minute in the past, instead they arrived almost a century in the future in downtown Orient without any warning.


Powers:

---

Describe your abilities: Can safely and with great haste consume industrial quantities of Salt.
Why did you turn to crime: For more salt.
Why did you further become a supervillain: Rising to the rank of supervillain is in the works.
How do you feel about the Infinites: Don't really car about them.
What's your end goal: Steal more salt I guess. Also other spices.
You've captured the hero/heroine, what happens now: Torture them by forcing a spoonful of spice down their throat.
Do you plan out your monologues or do they just sort of happen: Of course I don't!
Let's hear a sample of your evil laugh (the noise you'd make when your plan is succeeding):
- "MU... ahem... cough... MUHAHAHAHAAA, WUNDERBAR!"
Let's hear a sample of your evil roar (the noise you make when your plan is failing):
- "...Nein... NEEIIIN!"
Any lines you won't cross: Front lines.
Would you prefer an archenemy, or would you rather just drift around from rogues gallery to rogues gallery: Drifting sounds fun!

Ha! Definitely accepted! WELCOME TO THE INFINITES! Feel free to begin at the villains' meeting in Ulterior Motive Man's basement.

[Talchyon]

Are new people still being accepted?

They sure are. And this is a great time. We just started our 2nd arc, and it's a great time for new characters to get started. You don't have to know anything about the 1st arc. You'll pick it up on the way.

-Talc

[The Last Abode of Pando]

On a related similar completely unrelated regular amount of unrelated note, does anyone have any ideas for superhero names for my characters, Ed and Aesculapius Johnson?

[Harkback Union]

Name: Kaptain Salzesser
Codename: Herr Salz
Age: 33
Sex: Male
Appearance:

(Image)

This but with an evil smile...
Biography:

Born a century ago in a militaristic society into a family of rural salt miners. He studied at the imperial military academy and enlisted in the army to fight for his country. One day, while eating his lunch at the mess hall, Salzesser found his goulash to be lacking in salt. He thus took the salt cup assigned to his table and poured some salt on the soup. Unfortunately, he dropped the cup into the hot soup by accident and its contents dissolved amidst his meal. Since the kaptain was really hungry, he decided to eat the soup anyway, and to his surprise, it tasted good, really good. The next day, he used even more salt on his smoked würsts, and even salted the bread that came with the tasty sausages. Eventually, he developed a habit of adding increasingly large amounts of salt to his meals each day...

He kicked out of the officer core stealing all the salt cups from the canteen for private use (and even the ones from the officer's lounge) and was demoted all the way to a lowly private. As additional punishment, he was enlisted in a dangerous experiment secretly run in utmost secrecy at a secret mountain base, in which Private Salzesser and 2 other ex - officers, Hans Pfeffer and Origano Moretti (aka, Il divoratore di tutti Origano) were to be first to test a mysterious machine that was bound to win the war for the Empire.

However, the experiment didn't go exactly as planned. Salzesser and his fellow lab rats were told that they would soon find themselves 1 minute in the past, instead they arrived almost a century in the future in downtown Orient without any warning.


Powers:

---

Describe your abilities: Can safely and with great haste consume industrial quantities of Salt.
Why did you turn to crime: For more salt.
Why did you further become a supervillain: Rising to the rank of supervillain is in the works.
How do you feel about the Infinites: Don't really car about them.
What's your end goal: Steal more salt I guess. Also other spices.
You've captured the hero/heroine, what happens now: Torture them by forcing a spoonful of spice down their throat.
Do you plan out your monologues or do they just sort of happen: Of course I don't!
Let's hear a sample of your evil laugh (the noise you'd make when your plan is succeeding):
- "MU... ahem... cough... MUHAHAHAHAAA, WUNDERBAR!"
Let's hear a sample of your evil roar (the noise you make when your plan is failing):
- "...Nein... NEEIIIN!"
Any lines you won't cross: Front lines.
Would you prefer an archenemy, or would you rather just drift around from rogues gallery to rogues gallery: Drifting sounds fun!

Ha! Definitely accepted! WELCOME TO THE INFINITES! Feel free to begin at the villains' meeting in Ulterior Motive Man's basement.

I was kind of plotting to continue the story of the trio from where the biography, but If you want I can skip into where they arrive at the evil meeting.

[Talchyon]

Ha! Definitely accepted! WELCOME TO THE INFINITES! Feel free to begin at the villains' meeting in Ulterior Motive Man's basement.

I was kind of plotting to continue the story of the trio from where the biography, but If you want I can skip into where they arrive at the evil meeting.

I don't mind having a backstory in there if you want. Maybe have part of it where Salz is at the meeting.

-Talc

[Harkback Union]

How about I write a long-winded into post about the captain arriving in Orient and finding their way to the evil meeting?
It would take awhile to write though.

[Talchyon]

How about I write a long-winded into post about the captain arriving in Orient and finding their way to the evil meeting?
It would take awhile to write though.

If you want to do it, that's fine. Don't spend all your writing juices for this one post, though.

-Talc

[Harkback Union]

How about I write a long-winded into post about the captain arriving in Orient and finding their way to the evil meeting?
It would take awhile to write though.

If you want to do it, that's fine. Don't spend all your writing juices for this one post, though.

-Talc

Yeah, I kinda had it all planned out for multiple posts, but I can cramp it all into one.

[Mirigli]

Name: Cleo Milcox
Codename: "Cinderella"
Age: 83 & 27
Sex: F
Appearance: Stereotypical blond American & a wrinkled old hag
Bio: Cleo Milcox has been arrested 16 times for identity theft. Her parents always just thought she had a creepy Scottish babysitter, absentmindedly wondering when they'd hired her. She's currently just wanting a shiny badge so her neighbors stop harassing her.
Powers: transforms into a Scottish grandmother named Alma Marks-Doyle at noon every day and transforms back at midnight. If she has enough energy, she can transform at will, but she's too lazy most of the time

---

(Things in parentheses are OOC. The rest of this is IC. A form for your character to answer.)

Describe your abilities: "I have the ability to transform into a 4'9 Scottish grandmother who has bad arthritis. You got a problem?"
Why did you become a superhero: "I'm sick of people giving me weird looks when an old woman shows up on my Snapchat. Also, I need a job. It's really hard to get one when you're a different person half the day."
What are your goals for the future: "Stop getting arrested anytime Alma accidentally breaks into my house when I forget my key."
(Why is this character with the Minnesota Infinites. In other words, why do they kind of suck?): "I tried to apply to New York City, but they threw me out because "homeless people don't count as superheroes.""
How would you describe your talents?: "Wrinkling."
(What about your character's talents make them a D-lister?) "At midnight every night I transform from a hag into a blond bombshell. Then it goes away at noon. It's like I'm #$%^&* Cinderella."
What are your strengths?: "Alma makes a mean hotch-potch."
What are your weaknesses?: "She generally spits in it too."
(Any other flaws? Maladjusted personality? Social issues? Unmarketable aspects?): "I'm #$%^& trapped in an hag's body half the day. I've got problems."
Why should you if given the opportunity be allowed to advance in the Infinites?: "Because it will reduce the identity theft crime rate in Minnesota by 50%."
(Why does the press hate or ignore you?): "Because Alma spat in a reporter's face when she choked on her dentures."

[What Has Been Lost]

Name: Cleo Milcox
Codename: "Cinderella"
Age: 83 & 27
Sex: F
Appearance: Stereotypical blond American & a wrinkled old hag
Bio: Cleo Milcox has been arrested 16 times for identity theft. Her parents always just thought she had a creepy Scottish babysitter, absentmindedly wondering when they'd hired her. She's currently just wanting a shiny badge so her neighbors stop harassing her.
Powers: transforms into a Scottish grandmother named Alma Marks-Doyle at noon every day and transforms back at midnight. If she has enough energy, she can transform at will, but she's too lazy most of the time

---

(Things in parentheses are OOC. The rest of this is IC. A form for your character to answer.)

Describe your abilities: "I have the ability to transform into a 4'9 Scottish grandmother who has bad arthritis. You got a problem?"
Why did you become a superhero: "I'm sick of people giving me weird looks when an old woman shows up on my Snapchat. Also, I need a job. It's really hard to get one when you're a different person half the day."
What are your goals for the future: "Stop getting arrested anytime Alma accidentally breaks into my house when I forget my key."
(Why is this character with the Minnesota Infinites. In other words, why do they kind of suck?): "I tried to apply to New York City, but they threw me out because "homeless people don't count as superheroes.""
How would you describe your talents?: "Wrinkling."
(What about your character's talents make them a D-lister?) "At midnight every night I transform from a hag into a blond bombshell. Then it goes away at noon. It's like I'm #$%^&* Cinderella."
What are your strengths?: "Alma makes a mean hotch-potch."
What are your weaknesses?: "She generally spits in it too."
(Any other flaws? Maladjusted personality? Social issues? Unmarketable aspects?): "I'm #$%^& trapped in an hag's body half the day. I've got problems."
Why should you if given the opportunity be allowed to advance in the Infinites?: "Because it will reduce the identity theft crime rate in Minnesota by 50%."
(Why does the press hate or ignore you?): "Because Alma spat in a reporter's face when she choked on her dentures."

Now that is what I call unique.

[Mirigli]

Now that is what I call unique.

does that mean I'm accepted ?

[What Has Been Lost]

Now that is what I call unique.

does that mean I'm accepted ?

No. I don't work here. I seriously just joined this RP today, sorry. You have to wait for OP to accept

[The Central Shadow Nation]

wat i miss

[Talchyon]

Name: Cleo Milcox
Codename: "Cinderella"
Age: 83 & 27
Sex: F
Appearance: Stereotypical blond American & a wrinkled old hag
Bio: Cleo Milcox has been arrested 16 times for identity theft. Her parents always just thought she had a creepy Scottish babysitter, absentmindedly wondering when they'd hired her. She's currently just wanting a shiny badge so her neighbors stop harassing her.
Powers: transforms into a Scottish grandmother named Alma Marks-Doyle at noon every day and transforms back at midnight. If she has enough energy, she can transform at will, but she's too lazy most of the time

---

(Things in parentheses are OOC. The rest of this is IC. A form for your character to answer.)

Describe your abilities: "I have the ability to transform into a 4'9 Scottish grandmother who has bad arthritis. You got a problem?"
Why did you become a superhero: "I'm sick of people giving me weird looks when an old woman shows up on my Snapchat. Also, I need a job. It's really hard to get one when you're a different person half the day."
What are your goals for the future: "Stop getting arrested anytime Alma accidentally breaks into my house when I forget my key."
(Why is this character with the Minnesota Infinites. In other words, why do they kind of suck?): "I tried to apply to New York City, but they threw me out because "homeless people don't count as superheroes.""
How would you describe your talents?: "Wrinkling."
(What about your character's talents make them a D-lister?) "At midnight every night I transform from a hag into a blond bombshell. Then it goes away at noon. It's like I'm #$%^&* Cinderella."
What are your strengths?: "Alma makes a mean hotch-potch."
What are your weaknesses?: "She generally spits in it too."
(Any other flaws? Maladjusted personality? Social issues? Unmarketable aspects?): "I'm #$%^& trapped in an hag's body half the day. I've got problems."
Why should you if given the opportunity be allowed to advance in the Infinites?: "Because it will reduce the identity theft crime rate in Minnesota by 50%."
(Why does the press hate or ignore you?): "Because Alma spat in a reporter's face when she choked on her dentures."

Haha! You had me laughing my posterior off at basically the second paragraph. Definitely ACCEPTED! Welcome to the INFINITES! Feel free to start at the heroes meeting.

-Talc

[Talchyon]

wat i miss

We started our new arc in a brand new IC page. You can find the link either on the first post of this (still being used) OOC page, or my post I think on the previous page.

-Talc

[The Last Abode of Pando]

wat i miss

We started our new arc in a brand new IC page. You can find the link either on the first post of this (still being used) OOC page, or my post I think on the previous page.

-Talc

This should be fun, but really, why space?

[Mirigli]

We started our new arc in a brand new IC page. You can find the link either on the first post of this (still being used) OOC page, or my post I think on the previous page.

-Talc

This should be fun, but really, why space?

The better question is why not

[Talchyon]

We started our new arc in a brand new IC page. You can find the link either on the first post of this (still being used) OOC page, or my post I think on the previous page.

-Talc

This should be fun, but really, why space?

Think of how sometimes, comic books had side-space episodes. I can think of at least some with the X-Men and the Shiiar, and the Avengers and the Kree. I thought it fit the genre. Plus, we get to skewer space themes as well. We'll have fun. I promise.

-Talc

[Talchyon]

Ok guys! So I think I got the character roster cleaned up. Lot of the inactives are just gone. All the new characters should be added. I'm keeping as new characters those who were participating or had just joined at the very end as active, to give them a chance to get into the new arc too.

Also, I'm going to post.

-Talc

[Shadowwell]

What all is happeneing during theis arc generally, Talc?

I ask as i want to make sure my possible character will be viable.

[Talchyon]

What all is happeneing during theis arc generally, Talc?

I ask as i want to make sure my possible character will be viable.

We are going to space. And interact with aliens. That's kind of the general thesis.

-Talc