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The Pacific's New Emperor

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Krulltopia
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Posts: 168
Founded: Feb 29, 2004
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

The Pacific's New Emperor

Postby Krulltopia » Thu Aug 28, 2014 2:42 pm

The Pacific's New Emperor
Bird steals declaration of independence: declared delegate of The Pacific
Image
A Portrait of our Glorious leader (image courtesy of Milograd)


There are amazing scenes in Francograd as the New Pacific Order has a new Emperor.
The surprise resignation of the previous Emperor was explained by now “Senator” Krull as he staggered out of his office laden with boxes.
“Well, it was an obvious decision, to be honest” said the former Emperor, still bewildered. “This bird just came crashing through my office, having clearly survived a hawk attack, and clutching the original copy of the declaration in its beak. I could tell by the steely glint in its eye and the way it kept jumping up and down on my desk that it wanted my job….and seriously, what can I do against a bird like that?”
Indeed, the new Emperor has swiftly made his mark on The Pacific. Through a series of complicated scratchings and insistent pecks on the heads of subordinates, his Supreme Birdiness has outlined several changes:

• The Senate Chambers are now renamed “The Nest”
• Daily offerings of bread to the Emperor are now compulsory
• Any nations harbouring cats are to be banned
• War has been declared on The Black Hawks

As for those of us at the PNN, we humbly offer our services to our new avian overlord, and proudly present his first speech as Emperor:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdgYLuswqY8

Written by Krulltopia
Writer of The Pacific Post - Delivering the 'Truth' since 2003!
Copyright 2014, The Pacific Post. All rights reserved

Note that all of this is satire and only loosely based on fact
Last edited by Krulltopia on Thu Aug 28, 2014 2:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Kandarin: "Tsk. Everything I know about propaganda, I learned from Nationstates."
Former Delegate of The Pacific: Birthplace of the New Pacific Order

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Pergamon
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Posts: 712
Founded: Oct 18, 2013
Ex-Nation

Postby Pergamon » Thu Aug 28, 2014 2:44 pm

o/
PACIFICA STAND STRONG

Senator Emeritus of The Pacific - Ret. Regent of the New Pacific Order

"The only war that matters is the war of the Feederite Class against the Userite. UCR Organizations and Cabals that befoul GCR with their presence, disguised as ruling elite within them, must be removed and their power must be broken. This is the ultimate imperative of the Revolutionaries true to the GCR and the Pacifics, which have nothing to lose but the chains from Userite oppression."

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The Church of Satan
Minister
 
Posts: 2193
Founded: Apr 15, 2013
Ex-Nation

Postby The Church of Satan » Thu Aug 28, 2014 2:48 pm

Epic. Just epic. :D
The Rejected Realms: Former Delegate | Former Vice Delegate | Longest Consecutively Serving Officer in TRR History - 824 Days
Free the WA gnomes!

Chanku: This isn't an election it's an assault on the eyes. | Ikania: Hear! The Gospel of... Satan. Erh...
Yuno: Not gonna yell, but CoS is one of the best delegates ever | Ever-Wandering Souls: In the liberal justice system, raiding-based offenses are considered especially heinous. In The South Pacific, the dedicated defenders who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Council on Regional Security. These are their proscriptions. DUN DUN.

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Todd McCloud
Senator
 
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Founded: Oct 11, 2006
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Todd McCloud » Thu Aug 28, 2014 2:53 pm

We shall rule The Pacific with... bird seed!

((Nice article, too! I love these little satire pieces))
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The Seeker of Power
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Founded: Oct 29, 2004
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby The Seeker of Power » Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:02 pm

All Hail his Birdiness!
Elegarth, The Seeker of Power
Consul of the New Pacific Order
Legatus of the New Pacific Order
Senator of the New Pacific Order

The Dark God of Huggers

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Unibot III
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Founded: Mar 11, 2011
Democratic Socialists

Postby Unibot III » Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:05 pm

Most of those conditions are quite reasonable...

Image
Last edited by Unibot III on Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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but Unibot is not a typical NS player.
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with the best of intentions.
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Cormac A Stark
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Founded: Jul 24, 2012
Ex-Nation

Postby Cormac A Stark » Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:05 pm

The title of this was startling. :lol:

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Francos Finch
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Founded: Aug 28, 2014
Ex-Nation

Postby Francos Finch » Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:10 pm

I will accept payment in bird seed.

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Henry Hawkenstein
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Founded: Aug 28, 2014
Ex-Nation

Postby Henry Hawkenstein » Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:26 pm

Francos Finch wrote:I will accept payment in bird seed.


I don't know who you are but let me just say the Birdcific will be ruled with an iron beak!

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Alcase
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Posts: 2515
Founded: Sep 05, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Alcase » Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:29 pm

Satirical messages don't usually end with

"this is satire"
Last edited by Alcase on Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:30 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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PrussianEmpire
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Founded: Dec 19, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby PrussianEmpire » Thu Aug 28, 2014 3:30 pm

o/
—« The PrussianEmpire From The East Pacific »—

The contents of the above post represent the views of Exshaw, the Imperial Legion, the United Defenders League, the Founderless Regions Alliance, the New Inquisition, the Black Hawks, the North Pacific, the Alliance Defense Network, the Atlantic Central Command, Francos Spain, Dwight Eisenhower, and the 1998 New York Yankees.

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The Seeker of Power
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Posts: 194
Founded: Oct 29, 2004
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby The Seeker of Power » Thu Aug 28, 2014 4:28 pm

Alcase wrote:Satirical messages don't usually end with

"this is satire"


It says it there, and I still git queried by people asking if this was truth... so yeah, totally necessary
Elegarth, The Seeker of Power
Consul of the New Pacific Order
Legatus of the New Pacific Order
Senator of the New Pacific Order

The Dark God of Huggers

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Valrifell
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Founded: Aug 18, 2013
Ex-Nation

Postby Valrifell » Thu Aug 28, 2014 4:38 pm

Aodan wrote:tis bird savd mi lyfe


That bird saved all our lives.

God bless 'im.
HAVING AN ALL CAPS SIG MAKES ME FEEL SMART

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The Church of Satan
Minister
 
Posts: 2193
Founded: Apr 15, 2013
Ex-Nation

Postby The Church of Satan » Thu Aug 28, 2014 5:46 pm

Long live the main course!
The Rejected Realms: Former Delegate | Former Vice Delegate | Longest Consecutively Serving Officer in TRR History - 824 Days
Free the WA gnomes!

Chanku: This isn't an election it's an assault on the eyes. | Ikania: Hear! The Gospel of... Satan. Erh...
Yuno: Not gonna yell, but CoS is one of the best delegates ever | Ever-Wandering Souls: In the liberal justice system, raiding-based offenses are considered especially heinous. In The South Pacific, the dedicated defenders who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Council on Regional Security. These are their proscriptions. DUN DUN.

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Milograd
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Posts: 5894
Founded: Feb 10, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Milograd » Thu Aug 28, 2014 7:28 pm

I am glad that my final piece of NS art got to see the light of day.

Hail The Pacific!
Retired

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Darkesia
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Founded: Mar 01, 2005
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Darkesia » Thu Aug 28, 2014 7:40 pm

Hail the Emperor Most Fowl!
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Barunei
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Founded: Nov 21, 2012
Ex-Nation

Postby Barunei » Thu Aug 28, 2014 7:53 pm

My heart skipped a beat when I read the title. But excellent work of satire.
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The Grim Reaper
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Founded: Oct 08, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby The Grim Reaper » Thu Aug 28, 2014 9:43 pm

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Krulltopia
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Posts: 168
Founded: Feb 29, 2004
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Krulltopia » Fri Aug 29, 2014 12:02 am

The Seeker of Power wrote:
Alcase wrote:Satirical messages don't usually end with

"this is satire"


It says it there, and I still git queried by people asking if this was truth... so yeah, totally necessary


Yep, and the messages started shortly after it was published. So imagine what it had been like if I hadn't included the disclaimer.
Kandarin: "Tsk. Everything I know about propaganda, I learned from Nationstates."
Former Delegate of The Pacific: Birthplace of the New Pacific Order

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The Seeker of Power
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 194
Founded: Oct 29, 2004
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby The Seeker of Power » Fri Aug 29, 2014 2:36 pm

Plus, we can always be captains of stating the obvious. There is no rule against it!
Elegarth, The Seeker of Power
Consul of the New Pacific Order
Legatus of the New Pacific Order
Senator of the New Pacific Order

The Dark God of Huggers

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the Imperial Crown
Envoy
 
Posts: 345
Founded: Apr 17, 2008
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby the Imperial Crown » Fri Aug 29, 2014 2:41 pm

In my defence, the Equilism edition didn't have the "this is satire" disclaimer.
- Lord Ravenclaw -
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= The Desert Star of Osiris =
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Onderkelkia
Diplomat
 
Posts: 998
Founded: Aug 13, 2006
Corporate Police State

Postby Onderkelkia » Fri Aug 29, 2014 3:03 pm

The latest in a series of attempts by the NPO and their friends to generate speculation about Krulltopia's future without confirming anything of substance.

One might wonder why the NPO are so keen at enticing foreigners to indulge themselves in vague guesses about the future of the Emperor of The Pacific.
Emperor Emeritus of The Land of Kings and Emperors
King Emeritus of Norwood, etc.

Duke of Roskilde, of Balder

Archduke of Niso, of the LKE
Archduke, of The New Inquisition
Viscount, of Great Britain and Ireland
Honoured Citizen of Europeia
Emperor of the LKE
LKE Prime Minister
LKE Chief of the Imperial General Staff

Crown Prince of TNI
Commander of TNI Armed Forces
Director General of TNI Intelligence

Vice Delegate and Crown Prince of Balder
Prince of Jomsborg
Balder Statsminister
Balder Chief of Defence

GB&I Home Secretary
GB&I First Sea Lord

Chief Justice of Europeia

Member, Imperial Military Council, UIAF
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V I Lenin
Attaché
 
Posts: 68
Founded: May 15, 2014
Ex-Nation

Postby V I Lenin » Fri Aug 29, 2014 3:08 pm

Are you sad because it is distracting attention from your wonderful Imperialist schemes?
Last edited by V I Lenin on Fri Aug 29, 2014 3:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Intelligent Holograms
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Posts: 103
Founded: Nov 07, 2010
Ex-Nation

Postby Intelligent Holograms » Fri Aug 29, 2014 3:11 pm

Onderkelkia wrote:The latest in a series of attempts by the NPO and their friends to generate speculation about Krulltopia's future without confirming anything of substance.

One might wonder why the NPO are so keen at enticing foreigners to indulge themselves in vague guesses about the future of the Emperor of The Pacific.


AH HA!

The plot has worked! Another foreigner ensnared in the NPO's heinous scheme of lies and deceit all in the most treacherous name of making them think about... the next Emperor.

*Steeples fingers*

Excellent.

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Onderkelkia
Diplomat
 
Posts: 998
Founded: Aug 13, 2006
Corporate Police State

Postby Onderkelkia » Fri Aug 29, 2014 3:13 pm

V I Lenin wrote:Are you sad because it is distracting attention from your wonderful Imperialist schemes?

I have no idea what schemes of mine you are referring to. I am unaware of them myself, so this can hardly have distracted anyone from them.

One is, however, curious to confirm what the NPO means by going through through this charade given its stance that outsiders have no place in its affairs.

It really comes down to a propaganda campaign aimed at creating mystique as a substitute for something more substantive.
Last edited by Onderkelkia on Fri Aug 29, 2014 3:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Emperor Emeritus of The Land of Kings and Emperors
King Emeritus of Norwood, etc.

Duke of Roskilde, of Balder

Archduke of Niso, of the LKE
Archduke, of The New Inquisition
Viscount, of Great Britain and Ireland
Honoured Citizen of Europeia
Emperor of the LKE
LKE Prime Minister
LKE Chief of the Imperial General Staff

Crown Prince of TNI
Commander of TNI Armed Forces
Director General of TNI Intelligence

Vice Delegate and Crown Prince of Balder
Prince of Jomsborg
Balder Statsminister
Balder Chief of Defence

GB&I Home Secretary
GB&I First Sea Lord

Chief Justice of Europeia

Member, Imperial Military Council, UIAF
Supreme Allied Commander, SRATO

WA Delegate of The Rejected Realms

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