World Cup 68 RP Thread

[German American States]

A Golden Dawn

Kapitel Drei

Kapitel Eins
Kapitel Zwei

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

Kurt managed to pull himself out of bed as he hit the alarm button on his clock. He sat on the edge of his bed for a second, engrossed in thought. Today was the day he had been waiting for ever since he had walked through the hallways of the Congress building. The day where a new German America would be born.

After getting out of the shower and putting on his standard tie and suit, Kurt grabbed a bit of breakfast. The nerves were setting in. He wasn't ready for it. After forcing down a breakfast sausage and some coffee, Kurt tried composing himself. Unfortunately, just as he was about to leave his condo, he disposed of his breakfast in the kitchen sink.

In the limo on the way to Congress, Kurt had to settle himself down. He breathed in and out a couple of times, focusing on his slowing heart rate. The key to the plan was for him to look surprised and not give away his emotions. To blend in. Kurt noticed the security was much tighter around the Congress today with the President around. He felt a pang of worry, but pushed it to the back of his head. He had to focus on his part in the plan.

Inside the National Congress Building

Kurt, along with the rest of the senators, stood up with a standing ovation to welcome the President, Johann Kruger. He smiled wide and waved to the crowd. He was graying by the day, looking very old for 58. He waved to the crowd and bent in to the mic.

"Good Senators, it is great to see you today! I always relish the opportunity to come before you and discuss legislation, and how to make our country better."

As he said this, a man streaked down the aisle of the Senator's seating. He held a pistol with a silencer on the end. He was the specialist. Everything was going according to plan.

"GOTT MIT UNS!" The man yelled as he pulled the trigger three times. The President fell behind the podium. Screams pierced the air. The sun was rising on a new age in German America.

[Eura]

OOC: Part three of the latest stage of the Eastwind Airlines Crisis.

‘It’s not fucking acceptable whatsoever. My ambassador at one end gets yanked into some bullshit meeting and is on the wrong end of insidious accusations, and then you tell me your ambassador has gone home? Fuck off. You’ll be hearing from us shortly.’ Amy Yarley might have been a young, female MP who often got ridiculed by those who were not quite with the times, but when she gave you a dressing down you were in for a lot of hurt. One of the Valladar ambassador’s advisors had been sent along to give the Euran’s excuses like a sacrificial lamb so that they could buy time. Meanwhile, Yarley had found out that Eura’s ambassador had been given a grilling in Metropolis and an armoured vehicle had been parked outside of the Euran embassy there. The advisor, an even younger woman who looked like she was barely out of school, left quickly and quietly while trying to stifle some tears.

The armoured vehicle manoeuvre had made the news, and Yarley had no reason to believe that move was anything but an act of aggression. She was well aware of how hypocritical of her it was to be offended by this, but the government had to hold its line firmly. After a short phone call with the Prime Minister, it had been decided that Euran armed police were to be deployed outside of the embassy of Valladares in Bastion, for the “duration of the current dispute”. Of course this aggressive language was not comforting for the Euran population, who did not understand why both sides were suddenly angry at each other over what they thought was a tragic accident.

Yarley was now sat at her desk with rather a lot to think about. Valladares was acting suspiciously now. The Ministry of Defence had informed her that they were conducting troop movements in the western reaches of Askoy outside of their borders, and a handful of their strategic bombers had flown close to the crash site in a rather aggressive fashion. They had stated privately that they would deploy an investigation team to the crash site within 24 hours, whether the Euran’s liked it or not. This was all fairly blatant aggressive posturing, but it was difficult to tell whether or not they knew the truth about the plane, or if they were just using this as an opportunity to assert their claims to prerogative in keeping an eye on Askoy.

At her own end, Yarley didn’t really know how to respond. There was a problem with a general at an airfield who seemed to have jumped the gun by going to maximum readiness, and that was still being dealt with. However, much more importantly, it was unclear how she could respond to the aggressive posturing of Valladares with a show of force without escalating things too much. The only forces that could mobilise towards Askoy at the drop of a hat were an entire armoured corps just outside the country. Sending them out would be too strong a response; something else had to be done. Yarley sighed as she realised that it would be another late shift tonight, and picked up the phone to make some calls.

--------------------

At the Ministry of Defence, there was an air of what one might call panic. The government had barely noticed despite Liston’s notice given to the Foreign Minister, but the MoD were acutely aware of a dangerous developing situation. It wasn’t the sudden rise in tension – some might say a crisis – over what had happened in Askoy either. The panic had been started by an event which nobody outside of the military sphere had really noticed. General Max Browder, commanding officer of the 38th Strategic Bomb Wing, had put his base AFB Androse into a state of high alert. All staff had been recalled, security was tight, the place was sealed off and most worryingly of all, all aircrew of the 38th and its forty SB-16 “Blackjack” strategic bombers had been mobilised. Their aircraft were waiting on the tarmac for them, engines warmed up and ready to go at any time.

This had happened without any authorisation from the MoD or air force staff. Browder had a perfect record too; this had seemingly come from nowhere. Repeated attempts to communicate with Browder had failed, and now the chiefs of staff were having an argument about what to do deep in the bowels of Blackhall.
‘I’m sure it’s just a miscommunication.’
‘Miscommunication? We sent some staff down there to ask what was going on and they were ordered to turn back by the guards! Either the place has been seized from the inside by a foreign power, or Browder has lost his shit. Either way, we have to act now before he does something stupid.’
‘What are you suggesting we do, then? Shoot our way through our own guys? Don’t be ridiculous.’
‘Oh come off it, that’s not what he’s suggesting. What he was suggesting is that we get someone down there with a significant detachment of troops and some local police and order Browder to allow us to relieve the current troops there.’

‘Relieve?’
‘Yes, relieve.’
‘I hope that isn’t a euphemism for seizing the base by force.’
‘I’d rather drop some reservists, off duty pilots and a nutty general than start a war.’
‘You know, you scare me sometimes Gregory. Really scare me.’
‘Yeah well, what we need at a time like this is the ability to put fear into people. Make them follow orders. And that is why we need to send troops, and soon.’
‘Right. We are all agreed then?’ Everyone nodded and murmured in agreement. ‘Right. What’s the closest sizeable army grouping we have?’
‘Liston, the guy who reported it, controls Army Core Group West. He can deploy a fraction of his force and it should be enough. He’s got a barracks and armoury within a couple of dozen miles of the airbase.’
‘Ok then, someone get on the line with Liston and get him there now. And if any of those Blackjack’s take off, get some fighters up and talk them down. If this guy is serious, I refuse to let him start a nuclear war over a bit of sabre rattling over some shitty airliner.’

[Polar Islandstates]

President Iversen-Eklund sat alone in the canteen in the basements underneath the Federal Assembly building. Brick clad brick barrel vaults always gave the air of a certain era to the canteen, but in reality they were as modern as the rest of the modern building. Quite why the architects had decided the basements and the basements only were ripe for revivalism was beyond Iversen-Eklund, but such thoughts were far from her head as she tucked into a salad.

Predominantly, her thoughts were criticising the salad she had been forced to have by her public relations team. Not because a salad gave the air of healthy living, or that she needed to lose weight, or anything like that. Nope, it was a simple choice between sloppy joes and venison stew today in the kitchen, and neither of those dishes were particularly free of gravy. According to her team, there was nothing less dignified than a national leader covered in her dinner. Hence, salad. She'd have killed an aide for some of that venison stew, but that was politics.

A small cough behind her alerted her to the presence of Sebastian Einhart, leader of the DSV, her main opposition party.

"Yes? Oh, hello Sebastian. Take a seat."

"Oh, no, no thank you," he said firmly. Firmer than you'd have thought possible for a man that size wearing glasses that thick. In fact, most of Einhart's career was more than you'd have thought possible for a man that looked as unassuming as he did at first glance. Several political opponents had underestimated him for just that reason. More fool them.

"No?" said Iversen-Eklund, warily respecting her opponent's statement, "In a hurry, Sebastian?"

"Something like that," he said, clutching his tray tightly, "I'm just off to meet my party now to discuss your little adventure in Pasarga with Diedrich."

"My litt-...?"

"The military partnership, Katrina." he snapped.

"I see, and i-"

"Is it really necessary?" he interrupted.

"Necessary?"

"Provoking the Sargossans like that. Is it necessary? You know how closely those two were allied as recently as last year. Hell, they still have their own troops on the islands. You're going to avoid an overlap only barely by the time our engineers get there. Never mind the fact you didn't think to bring it up in the Assembly. You just did it. I happen to think that this is something worth discussing, first."

"Pasarga asked for our help. It wasn't us who drove the wedge between Soluca and Torgos."

"Nevertheless, whatever crisis of confidence the Pasargans are having right now I'd still have shied away from poking Soluca in the eye like that."

"Yes, but then, that's why I'm the president, and you're not." smiled Iversen-Eklund sweetly. "The last time Sargossa thought us a weak nation, we lost half of Kulmsaar. And then the other half to independence. We need to show ourselves to be strong."

"Strong, yes. But not foolhardy. I think it's the wrong decision. I'll be informing my party thusly."

"You do that," said Iversen-Eklund with a patronising air, "good for you."

Einhart huffed and turned on his heels, hurrying away with his plate of stew. Angered by Einhart's precocious interruption, Iversen-Eklund stabbed a cherry tomato with vigour. Defiantly, it split and squirted bright red seeds and flesh all down her white blouse.

"Oh, brilliant."

[Svengarda]

To avoid the questions from his classmates, and as a result, pretty much every single person on the bus, Eremeni decided to walk home. He texted his mother to say he missed the bus as he was staying late to finish up. The route back to his home was a favourite of Eremeni's, as it wound through a series of beautiful parks which the town was famous for.

Before setting off, he took the duck out of his rucksack and tucked him in the large pockets of his coat, so as to avoid the potential awkward situation of why he was holding a rubber duck whilst walking through a park. The duck was humming along to itself inside the pocket as he pushed open the gate to the first park. The stone path had recently been cleared of the snowdrift, so only a light dusting covered the cobbles. There was nobody about it seemed, so Eremeni felt safe to bring Kom out. The duck shivered a little when he came out into the cold afternoon light.

"That was a pretty stupid stunt you pulled out there" Eremeni said to the duck, who seemed to be more interested in two birds sitting in a nearby tree. "Kom!"

"Yep! Sorry, I wasn't listening"

"That's apparent. Why did you leave my locker? I told you to stay in my locker till the end of the day."

"I got bored. I could have done with some crisps or something. I could see your ipod but, y'know, having no arms and all meant I couldn't reach it."

"Yeah, tough break." Eremeni replied in a heavily sarcastic tone "How do you know so much about the world when you've like, been existent for 10 hours."

"I dunno, just sorta, in my brain"

"Right, but..."

Eremeni stopped as he turned a corner in the park. He looked ahead, and grouped around the bench, were several members of his yeargroup at school, including two of whom were in his class, one of which was his long-term love interest Sylvia Heikki (not that she knew). He quickly stuffed Kom into his pocket before continuing his route past the other kids. He was almost past them when the boy in his class chirped up.

"Hey Eri, what was up with you in class today?"

F*** he thought. He had to think quickly.

"Oh, er, well...I had to use the bathroom. Badly, like really badly."

"That's the best you can do?" muttered Kom from deep within his coat. Eremeni dug his fist into his pocket, which drew a grunt in response.

"Eww, that's pretty gross." Sylvia replied. Eremeni blushed and tried to hide his embarrassment. She had a pretty ambivalent view of him, but he knew it didn't help talking about his bowels to raise her opinion of him.

"Well, er, I gotta go home. Y'know..." He managed an awkward smile before turning on his heels and walking briskly down the path. Upon returning home, he found both of his parents still out at work, so he let himself in with a spare key, before dumping his coat on the table and marching upstairs and flopping face-down on his bed.

He then let out a world-weary groan, exhausted from the hectic day. After a few seconds, he rolled over and picked up the remote for the TV. He was about to turn it on when he heard a voice.

"Hey."

Kom was downstairs. He flipped over to face the direction from where the voice came from.

"Hi" said a small purple plush dinosaur. "Eric". It raised a stubby purple limb as if to shake his hand.

"...fuck me"

[Hutt River]

Winther stared at the collapsed bridge for a few more moments. Thoughts were racing through his head, not staying long enough to really make sense of them. The only thing that Winther was sure of is that he was in trouble. Big trouble. You couldn't explain away buying millions of shares in a company the morning that a bridge they were supposed to be in charge of just suddenly collapses, taking a train with people on it plummeting to their deaths, then making a massive profit from them.

He felt a bit guilty at first, but that was quickly done away with by the rational side of his brain coming into play. He had done absolutely nothing wrong. No-one associated with him had done anything wrong. BOB was strong sure, but it couldn't force a bridge to collapse to make sure it had made a good decision. But no-one outside the company knew that. Everyone who had half a brain would immediately get suspicious if they saw a load of shares being bought by that one hedge fund, and then it just happens that a disaster involving the company happens out of the blue completely unexplained. Winther knew that the regulators had half a brain. Most of them anyway. There would be an investigation at least.

He quickly turned around and walked away from the window. He didn't want to draw the others attention to it. Luckily they all appeared to be chatting to one another or talking to Scott, unaware of what was going on outside of their own little world. He should probably tell Scott about this, in private of course. Maybe in Reynell's office, he was the only one who had access to the trades and could show Scott what happened

"Brandon, can I speak to you for a minute. In private. Adam's office."
"Sure, anything the matter?"
"I'll tell you."

Reynell's office was on another face of the building to the conference room, so he couldn't have seen the bridge. The building was also well sound proof so he probably wouldn't have heard the crash, if it was that loud. The two of them walked across the trading floor towards the office. HRBC weren't showing anything to do with the crash yet, and probably wouldn't for some time. News was slow to reach the TV companies, so he had at least 5 or 10 minutes to notify the right people. Winther knocked on the door. Reynell opened the door and invited them in. His office was rather similar to Winther's, only the pictures changed.

"What's wrong?" Reynell asked. Winther looked rather panicky, he had never seen him like this before. The man was normally an example of calm.
"Open the window and poke your head out of it." Reynell obliged.
"What, I don't... oh."
"Yeah."
"I have absolutely no idea what you two are talking about. Let me have a look." Reynell stood back from the window to allow Scott to look out. "Where's that middle bit of that bridge? Has it always been like that?"
"What do you think?" Winther was quite annoyed at Scott's lack of common sense
"I guess not, judging by the commotion outside. Anyway, what does that have to do with anything?" Reynell showed him BOB's trades on the tablet. Scott flicked through the trades looking for what was wrong. "Big trades, but what does that have to do with the bridge?"
"Do you know whose supposed to look after the viaduct?"
"No."
"Western Trains. Look through the trades again." Scott flicked through them, still looking a bit confused, until he found it, and the realization hit him.
"BOB didn't do that did it?"
"Of course not"
"But how did it know that this would happen. The trade's going to make at least forty million when it gets on the news."
"I don't know, but whatever he did, it puts us deep in the brown stuff."
"Should we do anything?" Reynell asked.
"There's not really much we can do." Scott replied, "We're completely innocent and when the investigation happens they'll see that."
"Probably", Winther pessimistically added.
"We'll deal with it later. Me and Carl need to deal with that lot out there."
"Alright then", Reynell said, "although I still think we should stop it."
"Later, Adam." With that Winther and Scott left his office.

"We really are in the shit", Scott said to Winther as he closed the door, "but we shouldn't back down. He's been complaining about BOB for a while now."
"But he has a point now. It's been making some incredibly risky trades recently, things that I can't explain."
"Well, it's never failed us before, why should it now?"
"I dunno. I still feel very uneasy about it."
"We'll deal with it later. I need to send these up to look at the computer's. You should probably come along too so I don't look like a complete idiot trying to explain computer stuff."

Scott led the investors in a crocodile across the floor towards the room where the computers were kept. Winther lagged behind still worried about what was going to happen next. It would be difficult to explain what had just happened. When the were inside, the group gathered around a screen showing BOB in action.

"This is BOB in operation." he explained to them, "The algorithim selects the trades. They're on the left of the screen in the pending orders file, on the right are the executed ones."
Donaldson spoke up. "Those trades are a little large aren't they. I mean, you're trying to maximise your profits but aren't those a bit too risky. Especially that one." He pointed to the Western Trains trade. "Aren't they supposed to be on their way up? Why is it buying nine million from them? Isn't that the opposite of what it's supposed to do?" Donaldson looked up from the screen towards the window. "Also, what's happened to that bridge? I swear it was fully built when we got here."

As if on cue, someone on the trading floor turned up the sound on the news. The collapse had finally got to the newsdesks, along with a security camera video of the incident, which would be endlessly replayed until the titilation of it wore off. The group turned around to watch it. Winther could see clearly that the bridge was very unstable and that something was bound to go wrong.

"Well that answered my question", Donaldson said as a female voice calmly described the incident, "Hold on, did she just say Western Trains?" He turned to look back at the trading screen. "It only happened 10 minutes ago, and Western's stock is already down 15 percent. Your algorithim is really cleaning up Carl." Winther stared at a blur of pure profit going across the screen. "Bloody hell, the regulators are going to be swarming all over this like ants at a picnic."

[West Angola]

Independence Square, Cabinda
The second annual Freedom Day celebration was just as impressive and wild as the first. Marking the beginning of the third year of Cabindan independence, huge crowds had gathered at Independence Square in the capital city to engage in a day of festivities and hedonistic activities, with parades, performances, and alcohol headlining the days’ events. Overseeing all the happenings was Michael Raven, former leader of the Cabindan Freedom Society and now President of the new nation. The charismatic leader of the revolution had promised his people recognition, a release from the second-class status that he assured them had long plagued Cabinda while under Namibe’s jurisdiction. Raven was not a deceitful man by nature, at least not to his countrymen, and he honestly believed that Cabinda had been subjected to willful disdain by the southern government, and he, like many within Cabinda, had forgotten that independence had largely been a non-issue prior to the assassination of King Sien III just over a decade ago.

The drive to become free of Angolan dominance had sprung up like a brush fire nearly overnight after the assassins proclaimed their motivation to liberate Cabinda, and had grown still stronger after the attackers were executed. In their desire to escape the specter of Euran occupation, Kevin Garret and his cabal of co-conspirators had inadvertently ignited a revolution, although all of them would agree that it was worth it. On one side, a nation of patriots fighting for an ideal that had barely entered into the minds of their people for half a century, and on the other, a cabinet of paranoid men believed themselves heroes for averting a nonexistent disaster. The road to hell was surely paved with good intentions in both West Angola and its former province, and much more blood would be shed before it was all over.

Cabindan Free State, 13 kilometers south of Lake Massabi
Three years ago that day, the Treaty of Soyo had been signed by Queen Anna and Michael Raven, touching off wild celebration in Cabinda and resigned acceptance in Namibe. At the time, the feeling among the West Angola cabinet was that the new state would not last long, that it would quickly consume itself in revolutionary fervor, allowing for it to be peacefully reintegrated into West Angola. Unfortunately, however, Cabinda had managed to achieve stunning levels of stability under President Raven, and the Foreign Ministry soon despaired of the nascent nation falling apart on its own, and resolved to help it along the path. Approaching Paul Jorvin, the Director of WASABI, the Ministry entreated the agency into a covert operation to destabilize Cabinda and speed its return to West Angola. Jorvin already had such a plan in the works, as his analysis had concluded that Raven was the only man in power who could hold the country together, and that his removal would inevitably lead to chaos. Moving quickly, WASABI sent a team of operatives into Cabinda near Lake Massabi with orders to assassinate the President as close to the independence celebrations as possible.

Leading the operation was Lieutenant David Nichols, an expert espionage officer and rapidly rising star in the intelligence community. Many operations owed their success to his skill and instincts, but this one would see much of its potential rest on an unexpected source. After parachuting into the inland jungle and setting up a well-camouflaged camp disguised as an abandoned Bantu village, Nichols had ordered the rotating perimeter guards to disarm anyone who approached and bring them in alive. Nichols hadn't expected anyone to actually stumble upon the camp, the area saw almost no activity and, judging by the absence of bullets or surface-to-air rockets, their entry hadn't been observed, but only six hours after they landed one of the sentries brought him a visitor. In the fading light, Nichols couldn't make out the man's face, and had him brought inside the hut where he could get a look in a more well-lit environment.

As soon as the desk lamp went on, Nichols had to suppress his surprise. The man still seemed to notice however, and attempted to raise his hand in a calming gesture. Prevented from doing so by the sentries gripping his forearms, he settled for, "Relax, Lieutenant, I'm here to lend you my aid. Trust me, if Raven knew you were here, this whole area would be a smoking crater." Somewhat recovering from the shock, Nichols asked him, "Why would you help us? You know why we're here, I'm assuming."

"Only a fool wouldn't, and my reasons are my own. Rest assured, I can get you in position to remove Raven from power permanently, on the condition that you do not interfere with the aftermath, agreed?"

Nichols mulled the question, he was supposed to do everything in his power to ensure that Cabinda collapsed following Raven's death, something his erstwhile ally would never allow, but enlisting his aid would make the job all the more easier. On the other hand, once Raven was dead, Nichols would hold all the cards since he would have information that could directly implicate him in Raven's death, allowing him to dictate the terms. Putting on a false smile, he shook hands with Cabinda's Defense Minister, "Agreed, Mr. Hollis."

[Schiavonia]

Jenny: "Two-each here between Schiavonia and Sicoutimony, as we go into the final five minutes. A lot of tension visible on the pitch - a win for either team would be a massive boost for both teams' hopes of making the play-offs. Something that, once upon a time, would have been more than expected from the Sloths."

Kev: "Really?"

Jenny: "Oh, absolutely! Once sport came back to Schiavonia in 132, the passion for it across the country became even stronger! This was coupled with their move to Atlantian Oceania, a region famous for its sporting exploits - indeed, it was barely rivalled at the time - and it spurred the national football team on to even greater things, regularly making it to the knockout stages of the finals."

Kev: "Wow! So we really were quite good!"

Jenny: "Oh yes! We weren't one of the teams who regularly made it to the very last stages - this era was dominated by Bettia and the cup founders Ariddia - but the peak of Schiavone football came at World Cup 35 in Bazalonia and The Lowland Clans, where the Sloths finished in third place!"

Kev: "Not bad at all!"

Jenny: "It's not, is it? Who knows, one day, that could happen again. Though you wouldn't expect it from a nation of just seven hundred, would you?"

Kev: "I think some nations have more professionals than we have people altogether!"

Jenny: "Oh, definitely! But we can dream, can't we?"

Kev: "Of course we can!"

Jenny: "Although, not with defending like that. The cross came in, Giroux was left in loads of space, but his header was straight at O'Connor. Anyway, this successful period came to an end, not because of football reasons, but because the nation ceased to be!"

Kev: "It did what?"

Jenny: "It stopped being. It was no more."

Kev: "You mean... there was a time that there was no Schiavonia?"

Jenny: "Exactly that!"

Kev: "But how?"

Jenny: "Well, it was quite a bizarre thing. There were stories that wild animals were released into the south west of the country, which attacked large swathes of the population, but it just doesn't seem logical that this would have killed off everyone."

Kev: "So what did?"

Jenny: "Nobody knows. In the same way that the nation drifted into different regions - though usually at the wish of the nation - it seemed to just drift away, and nobody could find it."

Kev: "But didn't parts of it become other nations later? Like... isn't some of it Kjel-you-said?"

Jenny: "Well, yes. Which makes it all the more bizarre. Nobody has ever answered where they went, hence the excuse that they were ravaged by animals. But millions of people, across forty-six islands? I don't think so!"

Kev: "That does sound a bit ludicrous. So why have people always gone along with it?"

Jenny: "Because there's nothing else to go on. Where could they have gone?"

Kev: "Good question. So do you think that they will ever be seen again?"

Jenny: "This was in the year 148. It is now 271. All of those people will now have passed away, even if they had survived the disappearance."

Kev: "Wow. So... if everyone vanished, how come there is still a Schiavonia?"

Jenny: "Well, not every Schiavone was in Schiavonia. Though we have always been a largely insular race, there were Schiavones around the multiverse. This included the World Cup 37 squad, who were playing in Liventia at the time. And, although they had earned a place in the knockout stages, the team were deducted eighty points by the organisers because of the situation back home."

Kev: "That seems a little harsh."

Jenny: "And that seems a little harsh on Sicoutimont. A cross in from Berry struck a helpless Kent on the hand, and that is a penalty to the Sloths!"

Kev: "Well nobody really appealed for it."

Jenny: "Indeed! The Schiavones have a good knowledge of the rules, and that was not a deliberate handball. There was nothing that Kent could do about that. But a penalty it is, and Charlotte Chester is stepping up to take it. She is the finisher, and she would expect to finish this quicker than the Sloths' World Cup 37 chances. Up she steps... She does! Three-two Sloths, and we're deep into injury time! This could be another win for the surprise package of Group 10!"

Kev: "It could be! Not long to go now!"

Jenny: "But as The Field goes crazy, we must return to our story."

Kev: "Just like our football team couldn't return to Schiavonia."

Jenny: "Exactly."

Kev: "So where did they go?"

Jenny: "Well, they didn't feel welcome in Liventia after the punishment that had been dished out to them. So they went to a place where they had been made to feel most welcome - the hosts of World Cup 36, Cafundéu."

Kev: "So... That time when you said we have listeners in the former Cafundéu..."

Jenny: "It will be from the people of Schiavone ancestry left behind there."

Kev: "And they are Schiavones, right?"

Jenny: "Right!"

Kev: "So why don't they join us?"

Jenny: "We've already had this discussion. I guess, if they really want to, they could do."

Kev: "Have any of them been in touch?"

Jenny: "Actually, yes! And they like the idea we had! Corner for Sicoutiment! Is there time to take it?"

Kev: "It looks like it. So they want to join us?"

Jenny: "Whipped in quickly, and there's the equaliser! What a crazy last couple of minutes!"

Kev: "So what is stopping them? And, with the flexible nature of the multiverse, why don't we move closer to them?"

Jenny: "We could do that. Let's... OH! GOAL! Everyone went forward, and justice could well be considered to have been done, because it is Kent who has bundled it home! Three-each, and the ref looks ready to blow for full-time. How are the Sloths going to come back from this? The Field is stunned!"

Kev: "Unbelievable. Just unbelievable."

[HopNation]

The Games

Once again we travel and can't seem to come away with a win against a team we should have. The players really seem to be having some issues with opponent's stadiums, is it the noise, the crappy locker rooms, or something else? I don't think it's our players, well I guess some of it can be contributed to them since they seem to play down or up to the opponent's level rather than playing their own style and intensity game. You might say, hey we at least stole a point on the road. But this is getting ugly, I mean we can't win on the road. We didn't even score a goal in this game, which is the first time this qualifying cycle that we haven't at least managed just one goal. We have the top ranked and second in the standings team of Osarius coming to play the Hops on home soil. This is a good thing and hopefully we can knock them down another peg in the overall standings. We did have some troubles with their offense last game, but we were on the road and well we suck on the road. Look for an upset to come from this next match, which will put the Hops back in the win column and hopefully back on track for a somewhat successful qualifying campaign. This will be the hardest section of our journey and we really should have done better with two of the prior three games. We'll see what happens and which HopNation team shows up in their final four games.

HopNation Match Ups

MD 1: vs The Fair Republic (5-1)	MD  8: @ The Fair Republic (1-1)
MD 2: @ Theaoie (1-1)     		MD  9: vs Theaoie (5-1)
MD 3: vs Seraphic Empire (3-0)          MD 10: @ Seraphic Empire (0-0)
MD 4: @ Osarius (2-6)			MD 11: vs Osarius
MD 5: vs Super-Llamaland (1-2)	        MD 12: @ Super-Llamaland
MD 6: @ Sandwich Territories (1-3)	MD 13: vs Sandwich Territories
MD 7: vs Kaldtland (4-2)		MD 14: @ Kaldtland
Win|Draw|Loss|(4-3-3)

The Expectations

With this tie we drop below The Fair Republic in the current standings, but there are still a lot of games left and hopefully we can do something about it. If the Hops can pull out something at home against Osarius it's likely to see Super-Llamaland take over the second spot as well. It will really be interesting to see how this group finishes.


Current Places:

1. Sandwich Territories
2. Osarius
3. Super-Llamaland
4. The Fair Republic
5. HopNation
6. Theaoie
7. Seraphic Empire
8. Kaldtland

Predicted Finish:

1. Sandwich Territories
2. Osarius
3. Super-Llamaland
4. HopNation
5. The Fair Republic
6. Theaoie
7. Seraphic Empire
8. Kaldtland

As the games progress to the end of the second leg I'm not so sure the predictions will go the way they are listed above. For some reason or another I'm starting to get the feeling that Osarius will get passed by Super-Llamaland. The top spot should stay the same and Sandwich Territories will have the their ticket stamped to move on. Then Super-Llamaland and Osarius will have to battle a few other teams in order to gain their right to the World Cup Proper. Can they do it, or will a spoiler show up in Group 2 and shack up the standings? Time will tell and we'll be closely watching the next few matches to see how things play out. Until the next game Brew On Brew Well Hoptonians!

[New Sideburn]

It was raining out, but a knock on the door at 21 Capulet Street, Sabrefell, persisted regardless.

It wasn't any kind of special house - just Rook Barker's normal abode. A couple of large men in suits with unconcealed handguns and some other work behind the scenes had been enough for a simple living.
Barker answered the door himself - a little irritable, given that he'd just brewed some coffee and could really have done with it, but at least he could share it with his visitor.
Surprisingly enough, it was Rachael Kilgallon - the woman he'd beaten in the election.
He let her in - Kilgallon walked in as soon as she could, shivering.
"Do you want some coffee?"
"Got any vodka?"
"... Alright."
"Cheers." Kilgallon shed her jacket and shivered more. "Fucking hell."
"I'll set the fireplace," said the Margrave, still a little surprised to see her.
"I'll do it. You deal with th' vodka. Straight, mind."

About a minute later, they had an open fire to shiver in front of and Barker had found the necessary alcohol. Kilgallon took it gratefully.
"Christ... Christ I needed that."
"So," asked Barker, going to business at last. "Why are you here?"
"Been so long since we've seen each other," said Kilgallon, still somewhat in a reverie.
"Rachael."
Kilgallon took a bit of vodka, and shuddered. "Needed... that. But it's been a long time."
"Since the last debate."
"Yeah, which you won. Every fuckin' debate the vote swung 2% bluer, like bloody clockwork." Rachael grinned, bitterly. "Well, it doesn't matter. We had an honourable campaign."
"Yeah. I'm glad we both stuck to that."
"The Sideburnese people aren't interested in 'you can't do this' or 'the other guy is incapable'... our campaigns were about solutions. You know they've actually been discussed as such in political advertising circles? 'Cause they worked."
"Why are you here, Rachael?"
"I'm here because we may not believe in each other's policies, but... I like t' think we can trust one another. ... You heard about the news from the GAS?"
"Yeah."
"You know our ambassador? April Ackland - lovely woman, but literally seventy-two years old. She's gettin' cold feet. At her age I can fuckin' understand why."
Barker could get what she was asking, but... "Why do you want to replace her?"
"I'm still young, and I'm clever and I'm fucking bored. Anyway, foreign affairs is where I cut my teeth - you can't deny I've got the experience. Ackland wants to retire at... a pretty bloody understandable time. Who else is gonna take up her role?"
"And you will toe the line?"
"Of course," said Kilgallon, a little hurt at the accusatory tone.
"Just making sure." Barker considered his answer carefully, before giving in. "... Alright. My boys will brief you tonight in full at your house - you take a plane tomorrow morning."
"Good to hear... guv'nor. I'll see you when I see you. And thanks for the grog."

[Northern Sunrise Islands]

RADIO ESPORTIVA
Season 2, Chapter 2: Speed of Sound

Dainer: Don't you mean "I have an idea for money"?
Gloriax: Oh, you do too? Wonderful! Tell me about your idea! Let's talk while we drink orange juice. Maybe we can play City Rumble and-
Sunrise: Shhh... Okay, buddy. What's your idea?
Gloriax: My favorite energetic has a promotion! They will put a little gold ball inside of a can of their drink and the person that gets it, will earn a million NS Dollars!
Sunrise: You're getting slow, Gloriax. What's happening?
Gloriax: I'm running out of booze... Will you buy 100 of those for me? Here's the money needed... But go fast! If I get the gold ball, I'll share half of the money with your radio!
Dainer: Not it!
G.A.S.: Not it!
Kitsunia: Not it!
Hue: Hue hue! (Not it!)
Sunrise: *stares* ...Damn it.

A while later, on the Astyrian Market.

Sunrise: Phew... at last...
Ecosse: Hello, how can I help you?
Sunrise: Huh?
Ecosse: Uh... you?
Sunrise: Where's Hodori?
Ecosse: You were really resisting to not repeat this joke again, weren't you?
Sunrise: My reputation precedes me.
Ecosse: Let's see... Whoa, that's a lot of booze. What's that for?
Sunrise: Well, I'm trying to get funds for the radio again.
Ecosse: I thought you guys had surpassed that.
Sunrise: Well, yes and no... We still need to pay a couple of things.
Ecosse: Like what?
Sunrise: ...Salaries.
Ecosse: Ouch... Well, I guess you're buying these for that whole gold ball promotion, right?
Sunrise: Yup. And Gloriax needed these.
Ecosse: More?
Sunrise: He's slowing down.
Ecosse: Oh, right. Well, NS$ 150,00.
Sunrise: Here you go.
Ecosse: Thanks... Oh, yeah. One thing.

Ecosse slowly hands a can of said energetic.

Ecosse: Here's the right one.
Sunrise: For real?
Ecosse: Yeah. They told it a while ago on the lockers.
Sunrise: They?
Ecosse: Managers.
Sunrise: Oh... well, thanks.
Ecosse: Sure, no prob. Come back whenever you can!

At Gloriax's home, Sunrise, tired after carrying all those cans around, give all the cans to Gloriax, who quickly opens all and starts to drink.

Sunrise: You're sure that's safe?
Gloriax: Of course! It's safe! Why wouldn't it be? It's always safe! Much safe! Very safe! Unarguably safe!

Gloriax slowly turns into a hurricane a la the Tazmanian Devil, causing Sunrise to simply walk some steps back, then run away.

Hours Later.

Sunrise: *sigh* Why does it always ends like this?
Dainer: You hang around here often?
Kitsunia: Well, every time something bad happens.
Hodori: Unyu~
Sunrise: Oh, hey, Hodori.
Hodori: I don't understand why you folks decided to stay here... your home seems so much cozy.
Hue: Hue Hue Hue Hue Huehue. (Look through the window.)
Hodori: Unyu~?
G.A.S.: I think he said look through the window.
Proweric: You'd think he would speak English by now.
Kitsunia: Shut up, servant. Go fetch me a drink.
Proweric: *sigh*
Knuckia: Heard the mistress.
Proweric: I just wished Mobian wouldn't encourage Gloriax even more, I want to go back down.

Everyone was once again in the treehouse while Gloriax kept running through the garden, while Arceus slept calmly and Mobian continued to run around him.

Mobian: GOTTA GO FAST!
Gloriax: GOTTA GO FASTER!
Mobian and Gloriax: GOTTA GO EVEN EVEN EVEN MUCH FASTER!
Ytt: So, why did you give him all these energetics?
Sunrise: Searched for the gold ball that gave a ton of money.
Apox: And did he find the bloody pellet?
Sunrise: Well...

At the market, Ecosse keeps throwing said gold ball up and down, whistling as he looks at a poster with a smile. What poster? Well...

Ecosse: Like taking candy from a baby.

[Kericia]

Kericia snags group lead

Not much is known about Arbeitsgemeinschaft Alpenlander, other than the fact that they are World Cup newcomers and they have an absurdly long name. Regardless, Kericians will repeat the name “Arbeitsgemein-whatever” for many years when speaking of arguably the biggest day in the national team’s history. The Seagulls’ comfortable 2-0 win propelled them to first in the group and all but clinched a spot in the playoffs. Kericia’s ascendance was not without help, as Turori’s 1-1 draw against Gregoryisgodistan allowed the Seagulls to edge them by one point.

Perhaps most importantly, New North Aqmuland’s 3-3 result against the Greater Vakolicci Haven gave Kericia a twelve point gap over the fourth place Maroon Lions. With four matches remaining, and only the top three qualifying for the playoffs, Kericia’s top mathematicians have informed us that the Seagulls are playoff-bound, unless NNA can win out and overcome a seventeen goal deficit to Kericia.

The Kerician squad doesn’t get much time to celebrate, though. After returning home to Kericia City, they will host the now second-place Turori Eels. The Eels are prohibitive favorites and hungry to bounce back, so Kericia will have to hope for a draw at best to stay atop the group. A return trip to Svengarda awaits after the all-Atlantian Oceania duel. Svengarda are a strong squad and will hope to improve upon their current third place position. Even if the Seagulls can pull off the upset and win the group, they are still not guaranteed a place in the World Cup proper. Still, just making it to this stage has been an impressive achievement for the team.

[Glaser]

Bets, Bets, and more Bets / Wedisel Travot

First of all, we beat Perlasilangan in a moderately easy away match after we decimated them 8-2 in the first leg against the black-reds.

Match Review:

The first goal came actually from the home side, which stunned Glaser in the early minutes. At the 15th minute Mordeno passed to Jericho which ran inside the box accompanied by the weaker Hildlo who couldn't snatch the ball off Jericho. Suddenly, Jericho turned around throwing Hildlo on the ground, and from the edge of the box he half chipped half shot to the upper right corner where G'kroll couldn't quite deflect the ball away. Jericho got Perlasilangan a quick surprising goal which made the game unpredictable.

The equalizer came thankfully just before half time. After 30 minutes of lacking a precise shot to score and a furious Meliss, Mur passed to the unmarked Dret after all the Perlasilangani defenders thought he was going to try and reach the goal alone. Dret calmly and easily equalized for Glaser between Rowello's spread out legs.

Two flash goals in the 69th and 71st minute mark had Frund much quieter: The first was made because of a back pass gone wrong by Delgado. Bronde'e Mur intercepted Delgado's pass to Paterno and again gave credit to Cod instead of trying his luck and Cod bombarded the net instead of easily slotting it in but luckily for him he didn't miss. 2-1 for the guests.

The second two minutes later came in an organized Glaserian attack: Mur took the ball and headed right through the gap between Bercasio and Paterno who thought he would pass to one of the flank forwards. He then didn't lose his cool in an one on one situation with the Perlasilangani goalie and chipped gracefully into the net.

Another excellent Mur action directly led to the fourth Glaserian goal- and he didn't even touch the ball. Puliito ran up to the sidelines and ground crossed inside the home side's half in an effort to get someone to direct it in. His lucky cross got to Mur who under heavy guard from the two Perlasilangan center backs instead of risking shooting he opened his legs ant the ball rolled straight to Gor, who scored the 4-1 against an empty net.

The last scoreline changer came from a well taken corner in the injury time. Puliito headed it in. Glaser will someday be famous for making the best out of nearly every single fixed position they receive.

Glaser may be in a miraculous 4 point lead at group 22, but they still have to face the big three of the qualifying group- The Archregimancy, Chiata, and The German American States. Let's talk about that.

Glaser has good results against the big three, like drawing at the away games and winning at home.
If by chance Glaser somehow continue their incredibly good form (and luck) the table could look like this:
Glaser
The Archregimancy
The German American States
Chiata
Kinzar
Perlasilangan
Landpolis
Neuereland

Glaser has average results against the big three, like losing a game or two but drawing once or twice.
If by chance Glaser do their best and what they are expected of the table could look like this:
The Archregimancy
Glaser
Chiata
The German American States
Kinzar
Perlasilangan
Landpolis
Neuereland

Glaser has bad results against the big three, like losing all three crucial games.
If by chance Glaser flop out of their form the table could look like this:
The Archregimancy
The German American States
Chiata
Glaser
Kinzar
Perlasilangan
Landpolis
Neuereland

[Blouman Empire]

30 years ago

THE EMPIRE TIMES

Twenty Five Die As Wedrom Forces Move In

Hundreds of Wedrom police and military forces marched through Lower Wedrom, yesterday after the Imperial Court held up the Court of Arbitration’s decision that Lower Wedrom shall come under the jurisdiction of Wedrom . The conflict had started two years ago after the death of King Ahron II whom had left no direct descendants, while his brother had declared himself King Lewis IV, Wedrom had exercised their right to take control of the Ocfam treaty. While the Court of Arbitration had ruled in favour of Wedrom the Lower Wedrom government appealed sending the dispute up to the Imperial Court whom had upheld the previous ruling, the appeal to the Emperor was also ineffective as the Emperor upheld the court’s decision.

King Lewis IV spoke briefly after the Emperor’s decision to uphold the court’s ruling announcing “To all citizens of Lower Wedrom I ask that you respect the ruling of the Empire and not to fight against Wedrom forces. My council and I will continue to pursue all options to bring back Lower Wedrom as a proud and noble nation”. King Lewis also asked that all military bases not to engage in conflict instead allow an orderly handover to the Wedrom military. It is understood the King Lewis and his council have relocated to Upper Braxon until the conflict has been resolved.

Wedrom police and armed troops flooded into the capital Mortlan meeting small pockets of resistance The most notable of which was the mass sit in at the Palace Football Ground where an estimated 90,000 people loyal to King Lewis IV held a peaceful protest in defiance of the court’s ruling. Wddrom police pulled them out one by one resulting in injuries to both protestors and armed personal. Early reports suggest that 25 Lower Wedrom citizens are dead and hundreds more injured, two members of the Wedrom police forces were also killed in the conflict. Leaders of the movement have expressed outrage at the heavy handed tactics displayed by the Wedrom police. Further protests have been planned against what some people are calling an ‘invasion’.

Elsewhere throughout the country, forces met little resistance as administrative buildings, police stations and military bases were occupied. It is expected that it will take up to two years for the handover to complete as government agencies and business reconfigure their processes to comply with Wedrom law. It is also expected that the current Lower Wedrom military will be cut by about 75% when it is merged with the Wedrom defence force.

Further coverage pages 3-14

[Cosumar]

The Cosumarite Courier
Cosumar's #1 Sports News Source


DRAGONS ESCAPE LA FANTAS WITH DRAW, SCORING DROUGHT CONTINUES

Matchday Ten Review

LA FANTAS, FARFADILLIS - Fans who tuned into last night's Cosumar-Farfadillis rematch expecting more offensive fireworks were sorely disappointed. Instead, fans received a frustrating scoreless draw. The defenses dominated every facet of the game, in startling contrast with the 5-3 result in their first meeting.

The Cosumarite defense and midfield was very active and managed to keep Farfadillis from getting many looks at the goal. The Dragons' defensive unit continues to display tremendous growth, shutting out a second-consecutive opponent. And everybody knows that keeping Dandalleion and Roga out of the goal at La Fantas is no easy feat. However, once again, the Dragons defense was unable to get goal-scoring support.

Neither team was able to maintain much offensive pressure in a relatively uneventful game, with Cosumar out-shooting Farfadillis by a small margin of 8-7. Strikers Sur Arora and Addam Andsman-Savage led Cosumar with three apiece. Though it would've been an enormous victory for 70th ranked Cosumar to knock off #9 Farfadillis at their own place, Manager Farris Crowley is pleased by his team's performance.

"That the match was what people call 'boring' is a testament to how well our defense is playing lately. I think a lot of people are underestimating just how difficult it is to come out La Fantás with a clean sheet," Crowley said. "Our back line has stayed composed and really limited the opponents' chances. Farfadillis' best looks came on free kicks or corner kicks, which says a lot about how much guys like Abdiel [Assad] and Kirum [Mortonsson] have grown. That said, it is imperative that we start capitalizing on some of our chances offensively so that our improved defense can translate into points."

While we appreciate Crowley's optimism and ability to recognize his team's strengths, he needs to be more concerned about the lack of offensive production. The Dragons have not scored more than one goal in a game since Matchday Six, which was also their last win. While a draw at Farfadillis is an acceptable result, the scoreless draw at home against Alsacie earlier this week was definitely not. And let's be honest, neither of those teams are known for their stellar defense - not even Farfadillis.

It's not like the Dragons aren't getting opportunities to score. They just are having a miserable time converting opportunities into goals. Cosumar had two great looks in the final 15 minutes against Farfadillis, both shots hitting the woodwork. Arora's fierce drive in the 77th minute looked like it was going to give Cosumar the advantage but careened off the bar. Youngster Anders Engström had a close-range header in the 88th minute that was inches away from sailing into a huge section of exposed net but instead deflected off the left post.

With only four matches left in the Qualifying phase, all we can do is hope that the team that scored five on Farfadillis and six on Sameba wakes up in time to save us from being knocked out of the playoffs.

NOTE: The Dragons were missing starting forward Francois Renault, who sprained his left ankle in practice prior to the match. Corey Simmons filled in as the starter against Farfadillis. Renault's status is doubtful for Matchday Eleven.

Cosumar - 0
No scorers
Farfadillis - 0
No scorers

Storylines from elsewhere in Group 8, beyond

Cosumar's draw against Farfadillis inched their point-count to 19, and dropped their record to 5-4-1. It was their third draw in four games, with a loss sandwiched in between. Though the Dragons (3rd) are still in position for the playoff, this slump has allowed Sameba (2nd) to extend its cushion to three points and has allowed Boring Paradise (4th) to pull within just two points of the Dragons. Both Sameba and Boring Paradise won comfortably on Matchday Ten, with five goals against Alsacie and The Andromeda Islands, respectively. If Cosumar continues its inability to secure victories against lesser teams, it could find itself squeezed out of the playoff despite holding first place for the first six matchdays.

Meanwhile, Usjekhipstahf (5th) kept pace with Boring Paradise, defeating Catholican Catholica (6th) by a score of 4-2. The Usjeks sit only two points behind Boring Paradise and are definitely not out of contention yet. At 5-0-5, they have struggled against higher competition but have taken care of business against the bottom-tier of the group. A well-timed run at the end of Qualifying could surge them into the Top 3 spots. It's safe to say that this loss knocked Catholican Catholica out of realistic contention for a top-3 finish.

Elsewhere around the World Cup, Kazamatsuri and Olastor of Group 14 completed a thrilling 6-4 match, with Kazamatsuri coming out on top to maintain second-place. This was one of the highest-scoring matches of World Cup 68 so far, second only to Vilita's 7-4 victory over Bears Armed on Matchday 3. In Group 20, 0-0-10 Neuereland fell 0-1 to Kinzar. Neuereland, with just two goals through ten matches, has the lowest goal-total in the entire World Cup. They have been shut out in all but one of their games, and have not scored a goal since losing 7-2 in Kinzar on Matchday 3. And we thought Cosumar's slump was bad.

Matchday Eleven Preview

Tomorrow, Cosumar (19 points) will defend its third-place position against fourth-place Boring Paradise (17 points). This is an absolutely critical match for the Dragons. If they lose to the Paradisians, they will fall to 4th place in Group 8. As you know, only the top 3 teams will advance to the playoff. Being on the outside looking in with just three matches to go is not a position the Dragons would like to be in. A draw would maintain Cosumar's precarious two-point cushion over Boring Paradise. Furthermore, with Sameba likely to lose in Farfadillis, an outright win over Boring Paradise could help Cosumar reclaim 2nd place.

In their previous meeting on Matchday 4, Cosumar was able to force a 4-4 draw against Grzegorz Wasiliewski's squad in Boring Paradise. But this time, the match will be played in Cosumar. With a much-improved defense and home-field advantage, the Cosumarites should have a great chance of securing the crucial 3 points. It will be an interesting matchup between two great midfielders in Abel Scarloff and Samuel Wong. Whichever one can establish control early on will be able to set their team up for success.

For a report of the Cosumar-Boring Paradise match and a preview of Matchday Eleven's important rematch with The Andromeda Islands, check out tomorrow's edition of The Cosumarite Courier. Thank You for reading,

Brock Denver
Staff Writer

---

Cosumar's World Cup 68 Journey
Matchday 1: Cosumar 3-0 Usjekhipstahf
Matchday 2: Alsacie 2-4 Cosumar
Matchday 3: Cosumar 5-3 Farfadillis
Matchday 4: Boring Paradise 4-4 Cosumar
Matchday 5: Cosumar 5-2 The Andromeda Islands
Matchday 6: Cosumar 6-3 Sameba
Matchday 7: Catholican Catholica 1-1 Cosumar
Matchday 8: Usjekhipstahf 2-1 Cosumar
Matchday 9: Cosumar 0-0 Alsacie
Matchday 10: Farfadillis 0-0 Cosumar
Matchday 11: Cosumar vs. Boring Paradise (Home)
Matchday 12: The Andromeda Islands vs. Cosumar (Away)
Matchday 13: Sameba vs. Cosumar (Away)
Matchday 14: Cosumar vs. Catholican Catholica (Home)
Blue: Draw
Green: Victory
Red: Defeat

Cosumar's Goal-Scorers Tally (29 GF)
Sur Arora: 8 goals
Addam Andsman-Savage: 5 goals
Francois Renault: 5 goals
Ejegefe Na'Safeh: 3 goals
Abel Scarloff: 2 goals
Corey Simmons: 2 goals
Paaron Petrov: 1 goal
Thomas Teverridge: 1 goal
Tae Woo Miyori: 1 goal
Anders Engström: 1 goal

[Polar Islandstates]

From The Desk of Gustaf Kolehmainen

---

My Friends,

I owe you all a lot. I owe my career to your support and your limitless affection that has lifted me in hard times, and I owe my enormous and greatly appreciated success to the goals that have been scored off the back of support just like that. All my best times have been soundtracked by the huge noise created by those who have chosen to spend their hard-earned Sols on coming to see me and my teammates play football.

And now, it is time that I talk to you about the worst times that I have recently been experiencing, and explain why I felt I had to move from Surtsey to Franz Josef City. I owe you all that much.

As some of you will have been aware, these past few years have been momentous ones for me, both on and off the pitch, for various reasons. With Surtsey Island Gulls, my childhood club, I have won and retained the Divisjon One title for the second and third times in my career, won the Latitude Cup for the second time in a league and up double, and won the Copa des Campeones. We've progressed well in the Champions' Cup with two semi-final appearances and almost got as far as the Cygnus Cup final last year as well. On top of this, I've won the Copa Rushmori, and was incredibly privileged to score one of two goals as the Terns and I finally put two final defeats behind us to lift the greatest prize in multiversal football - the World Cup.

However, as my success on the pitch has reached ever greater heights, my life off the pitch has grown steadily more unstable. As many of you will have read in the press, my wife and I were devastated to lose our third child in miscarriage this year, an event that contributed towards the break-up of our marriage of ten years. In addition to this, the past few years have seen the sudden and desperately sad passing of both my mother and my father, leaving my siblings and I devastated.

Surtsey has been my home for my whole life. I played in the alleys and streets of the up-town when I was a child, dreaming of playing for my heroes, the Gulls. I can still remember the evening I signed my first professional contract with them, I went up to the parks of the up-town with my brothers and our father, and we played football against the backdrop of the many spires of Surtsey as the sun set behind us. It was a wonderful evening. I have so many memories of Surtsey. Happy memories. Annie and I met here, married here, lived here, and looked forwards to three separate births here.

But I also have many tragic memories here. Annie and I buried our three children here. My parents are both buried here. My brothers have long since left the island and I now feel I must do the same. I built my whole life around Surtsey, and now that life has come crumbling down I simply cannot bear to find myself staying in the place my bank of memories are so intrinsically and inherently linked to. It is simply too painful.

Regardless of what you have read in the press, my move to SK Franz Josef City was not motivated by money or success. I was part o the most successful Surtsey team in history, why would I leave for trophies? Similarly, SK Franz Josef City are not paying me anymore than I had been receiving at the Gulls. The move to SK Franz Josef City has nothing to do with the fact that they are the team that Surtsey have been battling closest with over these last few seasons; this is not a move to spite Surtsey in any way. I love that club. It is simply a case that after I had informed the chairman of my wish to leave for personal reasons, either on a free next season or for a fee this season, it was SK who were prepared to offer the most to free me of my contract with Surtsey. I didn't want Surtsey to miss out on a monetary gain anymore than they wanted me to go, and so I opted for the domestic move that brought Surtsey the most in return - regardless of the fact there were offers from abroad that would have seen me earn more per week.

Why am I telling you this now? Because, as many of you will have perceived, my form on the pitch has been poor as of late, and I feel like I owe you, the fans, an explanation. It is fair to say that events have recently been occupying my mind, and that I have been a shadow of the person both on and off the pitch that I want to be. You deserved better. I deserve better.

And so I am writing this open letter to you all, to explain why what happened, happened. I am trying my best off the pitch to get my mental health back into a positive place, and I am going to try my hardest on the pitch to get my form back to where it was when we won the World Cup. Those felt good, and right now, I need good feelings.

It was my therapist who encouraged me to write this letter to you all after I approached her with the idea. I feel like it is helping. And please, if any of you here feel like you can see parallels with your own life in the actions that have happened in mine, please do seek professional help. Mental health is not an issue to be taken lightly, and today I am writing to you from the desk of my new foundation. Specifically designed to help those suffering from mental health problems through sport and fitness, I have big plans for The Kolehmainen Trust and I hope you will be as excited as me to see it's work change lives as it grows and grows over the years.

In the meantime, please do keep singing my name in the stands. I hope to be there on the pitch for you all like you've been there for me. I have been before, and I hope to be again. Don't give up on me.

Humbly Yours,

Gustaf Kolehmainen

---

It had been an emotional letter to write, but it was a good start, and Gustaf Kolehmainen felt like he'd taken the first few steps towards recovery when he took to the bench for the match against Qazox. When a slight knock in the act of scoring to Wolff meant Rasmussen was unwilling to risk him, Kolehmainen was pleasantly surprised to see Rasmussen point to him rather than Vadim Illich-Svitych to come on in Wolff's place. Rasmussen had seen the letter, of course. It was difficult not to, what with Kolehmainen's team of publicists arranging for it to appear in several whole page ads in that weekend's newspapers.

And so, during that match, Kolehmainen took the next few steps towards recovery. He scored two goals.

[Felix]

World Cup LXVIII Qualifiers: Shootout at Stadio Altomare
By: Steven Smith

Felix, Apox. The top two in seeding and in standing faced off in the Stadio Altomare in Altomare, Felix. Last time these two met it was 2-2 draw in the Royal Stadium in Apox. It was a shocking draw for Felixians and it came as good news for The Phoenix. This match was no different, a win for Felix and they control their destiny basically. If Apox wins Felix will continue to have their lead over Apox but now there is no room for error. If they draw the status quo would remain, Felix would have 4 points of separation. The fate of two football programmes depended on this match and both team were determined to win. And who would be determined? The fate of the route you would take pretty much depended on this match.

The first half was a thriller (the whole match was to be honest) as Felix started off strong with a goal in the 11th minute with a goal by Gabriel Jenaro. He received a nice back heel pass from a lively Mikel Araboa and he shot the ball with power into the net. Felix was ahead in this impending 6 goal shootout, 1-0. You would think Apox wouldn't be able to respond due to the World Cup ending injury their starting striker suffered. But you'd be wrong, their replacement striker had a good game today. The striker started off well with a goal in the 19th minute. Tying the match at one a piece.

In the 37th minute the match took a different turn as Apox took the lead with a nice cross from one of their midfielders and a defender that came in and headed the ball in. As the Apoxians celebrated the goal and the fans in the packed Stadio Altomare were silenced. Felix had a chance to return fire in stoppage time but the ball harmlessly went over the post as the fans oohed as the ball sailed by. Felix was down by one goal in the half.

Felix and Apox came back after the break and the match went back to its speedy and quick pace. In the 48th minute Felix tied the match up with a good tap into the goal after a good series of passes resulted in the Apoxian goalkeeper being out of his area. Many of the Apoxians were calling for offside but the linesman did not budge and said it was indeed onside. Nonetheless they continued to protest, and they would get their "justice" in 61st minute as they got back the lead with a amazing volley kick after the corner kick was deflected by Aloysius Blau.

2-3 Apox was leading and time was running out for the Felixian side. It seemed a little hopeless for the Felixian side as the trust worthy Apoxian line held their ground not allowing any chances. Except for one in the 79th minute where a desperate Mikel Araboa kicked out a shot from outside the box and amazingly went in as the Apoxian goalkeeper was got off guard. It was a spectacular kick and the fans awarded that with a roar of celebration, they couldn't believe that it went in.

The rest of the match came down to defensive shutdowns by both sides as both forward corps had wonderful plays set up but the defenses from both sides did their jobs and made sure the shootout would stop. And it did as the referee whistled the game done. Apox 3. Felix 3. Each side picking up one point each. Felix still controlled their destiny with four points ahead of Apox and a resurgent Milchama. That's all we got this week, until next time. And remember to watch the Itanpavian/Felixian match next month!

[Albaie]

The Road To The World Cup

Preparing The Team

Brigadier Lord Mark Deberen of Horseton

Ulten Way always struck him. From the windows of his car he could see the twin lions that guarded the entrance. Beneath their paws were two footballs which he always found funny and a flicker of a smile crossed his face. Once upon a time there would have been four Imperial Guardsmen guarding this entrance all of them trained and heavily armed guards but instead today there was a 16 year old militiaman dressed in the brown of the 30th Marton Dubrack's Town Militia and carrying a rifle that he suspected had been used in the Second World War. The boy didn't even make a move to check the car and Mark grimaced at the down turn of the national game's reputation. Ulten Way was one of his most beloved places in the world for him as he looked out the window at the statues of every Head of the Albaie Football Association on the right and on the left was every Gneral Secretary of the Albaie Football Association since Sir Henry Ulten himself. The car pulled up in front of the large Victorian style building.
" Thanks John you can take tomorrow off after you drop me off tomorrow. " He said speaking to Private John Vincetorn who up until a few days ago had been his servant in the army but still in that role was now his driver and he served the function perfectly.
" Geez thanks Sir I won't let you down boss. " The Private who he had known his entire life after the boy grew up on the families estates where he was the cook's son and had been young Vincent's friend.
" Park in the car park and i'll phone up when I want you to come round. " Mark carried on and then stepped out the car.
" See you in a minute boss. " He heard the young private reply as Mark closed the door. He looked at the large stone building in front of him with it's impressive stonework and magnificent statues and gargoyles on the top. From the windows hung banners and flags depicting the sigils of the houses of the men who ran the Albaie Football Association and the badges that had represented the Albaie national team over the many years. Mark had spent so much of his adult life coming to this building either representing his father in his role as national coach and assistant manager or in recent years as the actual manager of the national team. Once upon a time this building would be glorious with the walls almost gleaming and the windows almost shining while Imperial Guardsmen patrolled out the front of the building but today that was not true. The stone of the building was dark after years of no cleaning while the windows were full of dirt and instead of the brightly coloured glorious Imperial Guard there was one single brown coated militiaman but even then he was missing a leg and his gun Mark thought was definitely something his granddad fought the Nazis with.

Mark approached the front door and pushed it open like he had done so many times before. The door was stubborn and he had to push a lot harder than usual to get it open. Eventually he managed to force his way through the door and he looked around the once beautiful lobby. It was dark and dirty with cobwebs in the corners and a level of dust almost coating the room. The once shimmering wooden front desk with it's pretty girl receptionists was empty and dank and grimy. The glorious pictures showing the national teams and famous events over the years were covered in a layer of dust. In the center of the room stood one man who turned round to look at him through the dark.
" Mark looks like we need a turn around in here. " He heard Duke Arthur Sportern say from the gloom.
" Aye we do Arthur. " He said walking forwards to shake his father's old friends hand.
" I always thought my spell as head would be the greatest in years but look at this place. " Arthur said spreading his hands around the room.
" We have three days until the team arrive for our pre tournament meeting. " Mark said grimly.
" Most of the staff still live in the nearby area and I can spare my household staff for a few days and get my office cleaned out and just stay here while we clean it up. " Arthur said and Mark knew he was deep in thought.
" We could ask the Empress to spare us some of the Imperial household and some slaves as well and some of the wives of the 1st Legion and the Imperial Guards as well. " Mark added quickly.
" With the amount we could gather we could have the building clean in two days hopefully and get if fully staffed again by Saturday as i'm sure a garrison in the city will be willing to spare troops and anyway i've heard the Lord's Alliance is surrendering at this very minute while the Noble Rebel Army is in full retreat while the Peasant Liberation Army is contemplating surrender so i'm sure we will have some Imperial Guards back soon enough. " Arthur said and Mark could almost sense the thoughts quickly going through his bosses mind.
" If we both go make some calls we could start seeing people here cleaning within a hour or two and if we get shifts sorted we could have them on and off all night. " Mark threw in a suggestion which Arthur nodded to.
" I'll phone up my household and get everyone down here while you phone Colonel Thompson of the 88th who's just round the corner and ask for some guards and some women to come down and then we'll both head up to the Palace and leave our drivers in charge of operations here. " Arthur quickly spoke.
" "Lucky" should be up soon so we can leave him in charge and he may be wounded but he can organise the people into teams to spread out and cover the building efficently. " Mark added in a change to the plan.
" Good good "Lucky" always was trustworthy and get him to get in touch with a stonework cleaner and a window cleaner as well. " Arthur added and Mark nodded making a note of everything he had to do in his head.
" And tomorrow maybe us and " Lucky " can go pay a visit on my father and check how he's doing. " Mark then added sadly and his father's old striking partner slowly nodded then pulled out his phone and started dialing a number while Mark took one last look around and saw in the grime a picture of his father's international debut and he pulled out his phone dialing a number as he turned towards the door.

[Valanora]

Valanora Times
Marauders On A Wobble

The Marauders, our great and glorious, are in a bit of a rut it seems, after back to back draws and the scoring outage continuing. Luckily for the side, Taeshan has failed to take advantage of the draw against the Royal Kingdom of Quebec, drawing themselves this week, keeping the Knights three points behind the Marauders, with our side owning the tiebreaker between the two. With nothing but low seeds left to play on the Marauders schedule, it seems as if it will be a straight shot into the playoffs and topping the group, yet this start to the second half of the qualifying is quite worrying. It is not winning the group that is this teams goal, that is very far down their lists of priorities, yet the stumble after being perfect through the first half is quite worrying. Taeshan and Quebec are not elite or even what you call upper tier sides and they figured out in that second meeting how to keep the Marauders from nabbing all three points, what's going to happen if the draw for the Finals turns unkind for the side? With another Cup with unorthodox seeding method, the Marauders may just end up in another group where there are 3 top 10 sides in the group and their recent form would say that could be very poor news indeed.

It's also the continued lack of goals that is also perplexing for this side, a side that has been famous across the globe and for decades for their attacking prowess. Even though the teams in their groups are taking on defensive tactics against them, particularly the Knights of Taeshan, the Marauders of the past have been able to find at least a goal or two to grab the points they need. Granted this lack of not being able to score has also come with an increase in their own defensive prowess, but it is going to win the side no favors with the folks back in the Commonwealth who are used to fast pace, fluid, and beautiful attacking football from their side. In fact, it could be the lack of enthusiasm by the fans that is keeping the team from really breaking out of their shell.

The Finals and the Final itself is what the side are shooting for, for that sixth title, and they have been for quite a few years now, despite the slump in their finishing places the last few decades. This team was built on a legacy of winning, bred into a pedigree of success, and are always hungry for more. They can make no excuses about not having the resources needed to perform to their best like some squads can, with the VSC allocating much of its budget towards the football side of the national teams, as well as the quality of the facilities that their clubs provide from training, to nourishment, to even having personal life guides to keep them on the right track. These players are treated like royalty on the hope they can deliver on the promise of their talent and skill, for club and county. The only thing standing in their way is themselves and the opposition, of which they are usually superior to in skill, leaving only their ability to self motivate as the difference between winning and losing.

This is where the captain must step in and lead with words and by example, for it is Hawk who epitomizes everything there is and to strive towards being when it comes to being a Vanorian professional athlete. The captain must once again rally these men and women to the cause, to get them in the right mind frame, and having the right enthusiasm to go and seize their opportunity. It starts in qualiyfing, starts now as they try to rebound from this wobble, to take the group by the throat and then forge their way past the playoffs and into the Finals. From there, it is the luck of the draw and the desire to win, which is always alive within a few individuals, but must be coaxed and coerced from a few, to get the united team effort and the pathway towards success.

[Pasarga]

"I don't understand why you had to pick the appointment for that time, you know that the Wanderers are going to be on then~"

"Is that silly football game really more important than spending time with your wife of over ten years?"

"Well..."

"Oh come on, you watch football every weekend during the fall and winter, you can give me one day during the summer."

"I know dear and I appreciate you letting me indulge in my hobbies, but this is the national team and our qualifying could be all but sealed up if we win. Plus, a spa, really?"

"Are you not secure enough in your masculinity to spend a day at the spa with your wife?"

"When you put it like that, it sounds worse than it is."

"Do you even know what that day is?"

"... your birthday?"

"*sigh* No, my birthday is in two months, and you forget it every year."

"I am sorry dear."

"It's our anniversary."

"Oh..."

"But if you would rather spend your anniversary in a pub and not in a spa with your wife..."

"Ok ok woman, I give up. I'll go with you to the spa."

"I love you to sweetie."

[San Jose Guayabal]

www.elnacional.gu/sports/highlights

You are in: El nacional > sports > Highlights.

NEWS
- Eura 6-2 SJG. Thrashed.
- SJG vs The Licentian Isles, the feeling.

Eura 6-2 SJG. Thrashed.

Wrote by: Michael Clarke
Follow on FreeSJG as: @Mich10
04/05/14
11:50 AM (Guayabalian time, GUT-6)

SJG was literally run over by the superiority of Eura yesterday night in Bastion, against a team of Eura that from the start managed to put unn total control of the party imposing its condition homefield in excellent shape, and go that way to destroy defensively impotent SJG 2-6 by demonstrating the clear superiority .

In yesterday's game could witness the arrival of SJG many fans who made the long trip to Bastion , which lasted about a day by plane, through the Guayabalense-Valladar colony of Alianza Albos and then reaching Eura, local fans packed the stadium to all they expected an easy victory, something they achieved with such easiness.

At a tactical level , the team led by the Audioslavian Kelly Sporadic, find out the favorable result for them from the beginning of the game , besides using a very offensive lineup to look their best during the match, with players like Skorji Oslograd or Tom Riley, the newest addition to the national team for the match Eura casually known in advance Rodolfo Zelaya, as both play in Northbrook Diamonds of Polar Islandstates, while on the side of SJG, Emanuel Inzer not bet on any other player, but he would use his usual starting lineup for the match, with a slightly more offensive than Eura when the attack trend, proving employ three forwards Sean Fraser, Rodolfo Zelaya and Jonathan Fana, with Rudy Valencia as SJG captain, a player who knows the typical tactical system that employs Eura due to the fact of playing in the Euraleague ( play with Holdenberg City)

The start of the nightmare

The game started strong from the first second, Eura had possession of the ball on his behalf, seeking to impose their rule and condition of visitor in addition to his extensive international experience by their players while he was very shy SJG to attack compared other games where you will find the clear area from the beginning of the game. Just in the fourth minute of play, Eura showed his way to scoring the first goal by Tom Riley, a play in which the ball conducted by a Skorji Oslograd who gave it to Riley with a lot of precision, so that it exploited the space left empty by the defense and the 1-0 score well in favor of Eura at a crucial time for all game where the teams are based in the game and scored a goal as early as this can change the course of history.

After the goal, Eura sought to increase the difference through long passes from Tim Curren to Sam Ashtree for this conduct a counterattack, Henry Hernandez deflected a shot that almost could have been the second goal, sending the ball to a corner. In the corner, agility and experience of the Eurans revealed, as performed Oslograd side worked, giving pass to Tim Curren who stood at the edge of the box after this shoot for the goal of Henry Hernandez , scoring 2-0 and thirteen minutes into the match, a goal which put SJG into knees against a clearly-superior rival in an early moment of the match, something that is not very convenient for players.

A bit of hope

SJG was beginning to show signs of recovery after these goals very early risers, seventeen minutes into the match, Árbol Saucedo was linked very well with Rodolfo Zelaya to put together a run of counterattacks, leaving unemployed Michael Robertson and Lyle Heath, that Saucedo faces toward the front with Chris Waller, then gave the ball to Zelaya and defined with the right leg, giving hope to SJG with 2-1 before the game reached the twenty minutes mark.

After crossing the mark of the first twenty minutes of the game , matching SJG was charged balloon Eura before a squad that was trying to intimidate SJG through short passes and made ​​plays that easily passed through the already vulnerable defense SJG , thirty-two minutes into the match was Eura signs of wanting to expand the score through a team move started from the area where Lyle Eura Heath gave a short pass to Tim Curren who ran down the left edge of the field, looking for a receiver , finding Sam Ashtree who found Skorji Oslograd to put together a couple plays where the ball is returned through short passes , making Ashtree will access the area , where they found an attentive Henry Hernandez to stop played through a sliding tackle and then took the ball with his hands to clear.

After the clearance by Hernández, SJG managed to connect three consecutive legs Sebastián Núñez passes midfielder Nasjonale Hauker Polar Islandstates who managed to make a shot towards the goal from Chris Waler , who stopped the ball easily, thus preventing SJG's draw the game at thirty seven minutes. Following that , Rudy Valencia received a yellow card the cuatenta minutes and two for pushing Skorji Oslograd , giving the team a free throw to Eura , which was executed by Sam Ashtree who made a free throw to give the ball to Craig Sinclair for give a header that went over the goal . After that, the referee gave the final whistle the first half of the match , Eura dominantly won 2-1 at SJG , something that could have been worse if not for the fortune with which the defense had in SJG the first time.

Halftime, and SJG had a bit of chance

Kelly Sporadic made ​​no substitution on the set of Eura, but changed his 4-3-3 for a more aggressive 3-3-4, with which definitely sought to expand the score in their favor and create more distance in the leadership of group 17. Meanwhile Emanuel Inzer made ​​two substitutions, James Moreira was replaced by Mattias Passarelli and Leonidas Bregoo who definitely did not have his best game was replaced by Darwin Ceren, a midfielder rookie -level national team who plays for Boston United of Northern Sunrise Islands, that team is the defending champion of the Northern Islands Sunrise first division.

At the start of the second half, he could feel both teams with the intention of scoring more goals for their respective causes through different ways, such as the characteristic backlash of SJG or the typical pass short of Eura who gets in trouble at any team . SJG seemed to see the light at the end of the tunnel fifty-seven minutes, where Sebastián Núñez made ​​a cooperative move with Jonathan Faña where Faña gave the ball centered towards the area of Eura after Sean Fraser gave the ball with his head by enabling Darwin Ceren for this only pushed the ball into the goal defended by Chris Waller, SJG tied the game 2-2 now would be a little more hopeful to achieve the comeback.

Let the thrashing start

From the sixty minute on, SJG seemed to have settled for the momentary 2-2 draw that was before Eura in Bastion, but that happened under cost a high price he paid for stick to maintain a tie when he could have fought for more. Sixty-six minutes, Tom Riley scored the 3-2 with which Eura was put back in front of the party, Skorji Oslograd did an excellent counterattack from midfield, giving a pass between the defense of SJG then Riley and thus enable scoring 3-2 before a Henry Hernandez stood stiff as a statue.

Eura was further emboldened to seek more goals in the match and consolidate the three points and so SJG distance in the standings, in seventy-two minutes of the game , Sam Ashtree made ​​a powerful shot into the left corner of Hernandez's goal, hitting the crossbar and then bounced off the head of Hernandez, Eura thus scored the 4-2 team which literally vanished SJG emotionally.

After the fourth goal, Eura started making incessant attacks on Hernandez's goal, which culminated eighty-two minutes where Tom Riley gave pass to Craig Sinclair who scored the 5-2 head to Eura, sparking jubilation local supporters, while fans of SJG not reproached the attitude of his players, aware of the potential and what it represents Eura football level. Ninety minutes into the game, put Skorji Oslograd cherry on the cake, scoring 6-2 from the free kick for Eura , celebrating a euphoric state that cost him a yellow card and was substituted to be cheered by the audience, as Albin took place Oslograd, who had no greater role in the remainder of time, after the referee blew the final whistle and SJG was lying in Eura by a scandalous 6-2.

Match stats

Eura 6-2 SJG
Yellow cards: 2: SJG 1 - Eura 1
Shots: Eura 30 - SJG 19
Shots to goal: Eura 17 - SJG 9
Ball posession: Eura 59% - SJG 41%

SJG vs Licentian Isles, the feeling

In the game now , SJG will face The Licentian Isles , with the advantage of being local and having the support of the public, which will certainly be massive as they played at Central Stadium " Mikhail Kozlov " in the city of Yuzhno -Sakhalinsk , a stadium where SJG has performed well against very powerful opponents , such as a draw against Andossa is Mitrin Vega, an opponent who practically disappeared from the map of football, and is now expected to do the same against TLI . According to the agency selling tickets " MasterTicket " have been made ​​available to the public more than 132,000 tickets for the game , which until yesterday at about ten thirty at night , it had sold 77,000 tickets , which 70% were acquired via the Internet , so it is expected that the tickets sell for more than the afternoon of this day .

At a tactical level , Gethin Ramsey align the same lineup , with a slightly conservative variant to avoid getting surprises, using players like Nick Krooijmans, apart from being distinctly average camipistas also have vocation defenders , so it is expected little more resistance from TLI.

On the side of SJG , Emanuel has Inzer resting their starting players , plus Mattías Passarelli plans to use as a starter instead of James Moreira, also plans to use a more proactive system to infuse the status of respect for the opponent SJG also that will seek to exploit home advantage factor and the continued support of the public, which expected to be revealed much more than normal after the crushing defeat which was obtained at Eura.

[Kinitaria]

OFFICE OF INTERNAL SECURITY
of the Socialist Federal Republic of Kinitaria

TOP SECRET - level 4 security clearance or above

The following is held to be a true and accurate representation of a conversation that took place in an official capacity between a representative of the Office of Internal Security and MELODY POND (print name) regarding matters relating to state security in the Socialist Federal Republic of Kinitaria. As such, this transcript, and other details relating to this conversation, may not be released to the general public. In addition, officials of the Office of Internal Security require a level 4 security clearance in order to be permitted to access this document. These details are kept on file for the purpose of transparency and thoroughness.

[tape begins]

OIS interrogator: Testing. That's clear. Please state your name and address for the tape.

Melody Pond: My name is Melody Pond, and I live at 24 Avenida Pobyedan, Mi'ato.

OIS: What is your current line of work?

MP: I'm the manager of the Kinitaria national football team.

OIS: What is the country of your birth?

MP: Jeruselem.

OIS: Do you, to your knowledge, have any sort of native Kinitar heritage in your family at all?

MP: No.

OIS: Please explain how you came to hold the post of Kinitaria national football team manager.

MP: I put in a job application immediately after World Cup - 64, I think it was. There was an advert circulated around quite a few countries, because the Kinitar Football Federation had just sacked Kristijan Evinov, he was the manager before me. They flew me to, to the Federation headquarters, which is in the Novaritan district of Mi'ato, and I went through an interview. A couple of weeks afterward, they got in touch with me again, offering me the job, and I accepted.

OIS: Then your appointment took place before the ascension of General Irin Kucinič to the post of Premier of the Supreme People's Council?

MP: That's correct.

OIS: You will be aware that times have changed since Premier Kucinič took power. He has determined that the repeated social and political turmoil affecting Kinitaria is the result of foreign agents, hostile to our socialist system, who look to destroy it, both from outside and within. Some of the [tape screech] concerned about some rumours of political dissent within the Kinitar national football team. Surely you understand how the players are meant to be ambassadors of our nation, and it could seriously damage our image if the team doesn't seem to be united.

MP: Yes, but I, um, I'm not sure what you're asking.

OIS: Have you ever noticed the players in your charge talking about political issues, especially in a way that could be defamatory to the image of Premier Kucinič?

MP: No, there's not really - we, they don't, or I've never heard them talking about politics. I try to keep their minds on football.

OIS: Are you aware that no less than five members of your team have come under suspicion for counter-revolutionary activity? [nine seconds of silence followed by tape screech] We are very concerned about the source of these mind-polluting thoughts that seem to have affected some of your team. If they don't embody the nation, how do you expect them to represent the nation? Do you know where these ideas could have come from?

MP: No. I mean, it's not [garbled] mean. I don't speak to them about the government, I have no reason to. I try to stay out of politics, I want to be known for getting results on the pitch, I have no interest in political matters.

OIS: You seem awfully quick to try to deflect the questions away from yourself, Ms. Pond. You were not asked about your own activities, you were asked if you knew what could have been contaminating the minds of your players. Please answer that question - ah, verbally, for the tape, please.

MP: [rapidly] Well, no, I don't. I - they'll go out sometimes, for some drinks, maybe after a big game, maybe they talk amongst themselves, I don't know, but I swear, I've never heard them talking about the government or the leader or anything.

OIS: But as I've said, you know the importance of having your team united. On the field, you surely want them all pulling in the same direction. It's the same with us. The national football team are renowned throughout the world, and we want them to be good ambassadors of our country while they're attracting everyone else's attention. Football is, in short, one of the things Kinitaria is known for - perhaps that's down to your own efforts. Do you think you could encourage the players' thoughts in the right direction?

MP: Yes, yes, of course, I understand. You know, the players spend a lot more time at their clubs than they do with me, but I'll see what I can do.

OIS: Of course, and we will be in contact with the staff at their clubs as well. But the difference where the national team is concerned is [REDACTED] and, naturally, that the national team are travelling to all corners of the multiverse. They should embody our country while doing so.

MP: Right, yes. But why would they be [tape screech] and I wouldn't be able to find out? I put a lot of effort into making sure I know what my players are up to, even if I'm not always there. You have to regulate a lot of things if you're an international footballer.

OIS: [REDACTED] As long as you're not encouraging anyone to think ill of Premier Kucinič, I would say that you have very little to worry about. You may have heard - it's been covered in state media - that there are gangs of troublemakers. Hooligans and thugs, mainly. They caused a lot of bother up in Serenberg recently. They're not even doing it for a cause, they're just destructive. That kind of attitude spreads easily, for some reason. It's that kind of thing that we're looking to avoid. We don't want to see that kind of trouble in Mi'ato.

MP: Of course. But my players aren't, they wouldn't go... smashing up the city, or whatever happened in Serenberg. I don't see much of the news.

OIS: Nothing you need to worry about in Serenberg, then, just vandals that the police have dealt with. You will know that it is a problem. You will have seen the evidence with some of the so-called 'fans' who follow the national football team around. That brings me to

(one or more pages missing from transcript)

OIS: Then I assume you would understand what would happen, if someone were to fail to protect the socialist order of Kinitaria, even if that be through their own inaction?

MP: Yes. I'll have a word with the team at the next training session, I promise.

OIS: I have to thank you for your co-operation. Even if you say you are not political, a few years in Kinitaria brings you to an understanding of how our politics permeates most aspects of daily life. We are a very self-aware nation, you could say, always seeking to improve ourselves. That's the beauty of our socialist system.

MP: Yes.

OIS: Of course, if you were to fail to [tape screech, static, end of tape]

[Free Republics]

Tonight's Matchday 11 Cutoff is brought to you by the RepublicSoft SaintPhone. Finally, a smartphone that plays true console quality games on the go, brought to you by the innovative minds at RepublicSoft.

Results

[Saintland]

OOC: This is a submission for the Seeding Committee, albeit one with a very low probability of making the actual committee.

Sister Polus's Thoughts

Hello, I am Sister Maria Polus, High Inquisitor and Headmistress at Progress High School in St. Ioannes. I am joining you today on Sanctustube to discuss several matters of concern. I have been somewhat busy lately with my educational responsibilities and have had very little time for videos, but be that as it may, I will still make videos whenever I can, which should be more frequently going forward.

I want to start by speaking about my support of our new King, Petrus XX. King Petrus's speech at his Coronation was inspiring and, as a woman, I'm glad that the King is challenging the falsehoods that foreigners are spreading about God's True Church. The True Church is not and has never been hostile to women. In reality, the True Church embraces us as women and permits us to live as God intended, rather than forcing us to imitate men. I'm really getting tired of having to explain this stuff over and over again. The inability of foreigners to understand that the True Church is pro-women and that their so-called "equality" is actually bad for women because it goes against our God-given nature is truly disturbing. When you don't believe in God's Truth, that snake Satanas has his way of leading you further and further into depravity and delusion.

I am also a supporter of our new King's initiative to send women abroad as missionaries to set the record straight about the True Church. While I think it is especially important that these women not be led astray while they are abroad, for there are many temptations in wicked foreign lands. While the Kings of our Kingdom have always tried to protect our people from wickedness, other nations have not been so fortunate as to have such worthy and Godly leadership. Indeed, in the Free Republics, the great evil of prostitution is perfectly legal. For those of you who have been fortunate enough to have never heard about this wicked "profession," I will say what needs to be said, but I will try to be brief. Prostitution is an insidious form of slavery in which the bodies of women are exploited by men for the pleasure of those men. Yes, the women can make some money from it, but prostitution is a degrading practice that does irreparable damage to one's eternal soul. It is an evil even greater than pornography or fornication and it is vital that every decent nation do everything in their power to stamp out prostitution. As we already know, the Free Republics is not a decent nation.

You may wonder why the Free Republics are being criticized so heavily at the moment. They are about to host the World Cup, so the spotlight is on them. I would strongly advise the people of the 15 nations that end up playing in the Free Republics, after qualifying for the World Cup, to leave the women and children at home. The Free Republics is a modern day Gomorraham with a culture that glorifies violence and depravity. As we found out on February the First, even the stadiums are not safe in the Free Republics. They do absolutely nothing to keep weapons of mass murder out of the hands of small children, let alone demonically possessed madmen. When you enter the FFR, forget about your safety. The leaders of the country are more concerned about coming up with more ways to enable rapists to get away with their crimes and coming up with new ways to let violent criminals off on technicalities than they are with protecting the safety of their citizens or visitors to their nation.

Not only do the Republicans do absolutely nothing to keep guns out of the hands of criminals, but they also produce a popular culture that glorifies violence and depravity. I was one of many who were subjected to that trailer for an upcoming software title for the Saint known as Robotfall. That absolutely disgusted me and I have to seriously question the judgment of Prince Andreas if he would allow that trash to be broadcast to an audience within our Kingdom. I will, personally, be organizing a march to get Robotfall rated "V" so that nobody in our Kingdom will be subjected to such disgusting trash. They also produce violent television programs such as the utter trash produced by the "Republican Wrestling Conglomerate," a group that is known for broadcasting smut. By the way, the RWC, as it is commonly called, is not actually putting on wrestling matches. They are broadcasting a fake "sport" that makes a mockery of the sport of wrestling and indeed the very concept of sport itself. If the FFR had leaders of character who truly cared about the spiritual health of their people, they would make the RWC illegal.

I also need to comment on Silvester Poppaedius, an Olympic Gold Medalist who has disgraced our Kingdom and his sport by appearing in fake "wrestling," both in the Free Republics and in Noburu Taiyou. It is an embarrassment that somebody who accomplished so much in the sport of wrestling would then turn around and sell out to the sleaze merchants of the RWC for thirty pieces of silver. Poppaedius is a true Iudas Iscariot. I call upon the new Patriarch, whomever he may be, to excommunicate Poppaedius and speak out against the scourge that is the Republican Fake Wrestling Conglomerate.

I will now turn to the World Baseball Classic, which was hosted by the Equestrian States. You may be wondering why you never heard anything about this before now. I'll tell you why. King Petrus XX, wisely, decided not to enter such a corrupt tournament hosted by the corrupt and incompetent Equestrian States. As you know, in recent editions, the WBC has seen some extremely unpredictable results, but that changed in the current edition, likely because the talking horse umpires were rigging the results. Of the final 4 from the 28th World Baseball Classic, the top 3 finishers all finished in the top 4 once again. The only semi-finalist from WBC 28 not to repeat as a semi-finalist in the land of the talking horse was Mosktopia, the least deserving WBC 28 semi-finalist. The new semi-finalist in the Equestrian States was also predictable. Who else would you expect but their World Cup co-host Cassadaigua. As we all know, officials from the Equestrian States have a history of rigging results for the benefit of their friends and at the expense of nations that they don't like. Why else would Feministvs Sanctvsterra terrorists, with no previous baseball experience whatsoever, make the playoffs of the WBC? The WBC also saw several lengthy delays, due to the incompetence of the Equestrian States. This shows, once again, why the WCC chose the wrong host bid for World Cup 67. (OOC: To be clear, this is IC criticism of ES's hosting and should not be interpreted as having OOC meaning.)

Speaking of Feministvs Sanctvsterra, the terrorist organization showed the world just how despicable they are by dumping buckets of cold water on the crowds that had come to St. Petrus to see the inauguration of the King. This was absolutely disgraceful and was, of course, followed by some cyber-crime, as they hijacked the Royal One broadcast feed to broadcast a message of hate to our Kingdom. While some, in nations with questionable human rights records such as the Free Republics, have criticized the way the Mounted Police dealt with these domestic terrorists, I applaud them. For the past year, I have been startled by the softness of our police, by their refusal to deal aggressively with the terrorist threat, but now I can say that I am proud of the police for giving them exactly what they deserve. My only concern is that they weren't adequately punished for their crimes, but I'm sure that any deficit in that regard will be corrected in prison and we did finally get to see some justice dished out to the menace that is Feministvs Sanctvsterra. Its about time.

It has come to my attention that the World Cup 68 Seeding Committee is looking for applications to be part of the committee. I will put myself forward for this position as I am a fair judge of talent who will use such a position to ensure that the worthy nations end up in the higher pots for the World Cup and the unworthy nations end up in lower pots. If the World Cup wishes to salvage its reputation, then they will choose a member of the True Church of Iesus Christus for a spot on their Seeding Committee.

Let me conclude with a word about our disgraceful performance at the Winter Olympics. As you are likely aware, our Kingdom sent a significantly larger delegation to the Winter Olympics this year. However, this delegation disgraced our Kingdom. Unbelievably, they went day after day after day without winning any medals at all. I just cannot believe that a larger delegation could not even match the performance of the tiny delegation that our Kingdom sent to Liventia last year. Our performance in international sports events lately has been disgraceful and I hope that all of us will look in the mirror and repent of our sins, for if we shall repent and if we shall ask God to forgive our sins and heal our Kingdom, He will do so and we will finally reach the Promised Land. I am Sister Maria Polus and I thank you for watching.

[Buyan]

Completely out of the regular series.

The Rise of Esportiva, truth of legend?
Sil Gellund

---

Often quoted as the minor one of the leading regions, - or, if we would consider Rule Theriault a leading opinion, the 'Region of Minnows' - Esportiva usually serves to fill the Cup of Harmony to a respectable size, the tournament once described as the 'best of the rest' but more often as the 'meeting of least ridiculous losers'. After the shameful display in the WC67, in which more teams of regions such as Greater Dienstad, World Changers and Aurora managed to qualify then those carrying Esportivan blood, the term 'the Third Challenger' appeared to be no more than a fraud.

However, during the last edition of the most prestigious of tournaments, Esportiva seemed to strike back. An unmatched amount of five qualifiers was noted and although these rather novice sides only managed to amass twelve points amongst themselves, some dared to talk about a revolution. Apox qualifying for the last sixteen, only to be halted by the Polar Islandstates, and a shooting star such as New Sideburn grabbing their first WC victory, were the cherries on the cake.

But as new rock bands appear to struggle more with a follow-up than with a debut single, one could wonder whether Esportiva is ready for the next step: to rise to the true level of a third challenger. This WC68 serves for them as a genuine litmus test, as it will demonstrate whether they deserve to quote their name next to a Rushmore and an Atlantian Ocean, or whether they remain - to paraphrase the rather popular RLNations game - Africa to a Europe and a Southern America: young and with a lot of noise, but not up for the task.

The fresh concept coined by organisers Legalese and Free Republics was meant to serve the new names, the challengers, the revolutionaries... The Esportivans? With only four games left to play, we'ld rather say that the group standings confirm the Esportivan status of 'close but not the fish'. Out of the twenty-four groups, only two are led by nations from the archipelago-ridden region. Northern Sunrise Islands leads their group despite surprising losses towards Bonticello and Armakistan, but carefully looks over its shoulder. In the notorious group five, Felix can almost book their tickets for the play-offs, considering their splendid record.

Once again, the neutral observer shall note that two out of twenty-four doesn't really announce a surge. Esportiva seems to bow its head towards its rulers. But if the 'new kid on the block' has one advantage, it probably is its size. The amount of hungry, unexperienced yet enthused sides is almost uncountable. Amongst them, no less than eleven park themselves on the second spot of their group. Amongst them of course is our very own Buyan, that looks with worrying eyes towards the upcoming duels against the great three of their group, United Gordonopia, Jeru FC and Albaie, but also a combination of well-known names such as New Sideburn, Apox and Paradystopia and rising forces as The Royal Barangay and Estope. The most noteworthy fact is how many novel sides - one would quote a Nova Anglicana, Kitsunia-Deesse, Kazamatsuri, Nexxus Drako and Armakistan next to our Hedgehogs - already appear in contention for those glorious tickets. The same bubble effect could be noted when it comes to the top three, the position that allows one to book a spot in the illustrious play-offs. Regional majors such as The Licentian Isles, Boring Paradise, German American States and Chiata struggle along with San Jose Guayabal, Albaie, Carialus, The Sarian and other Brenecia's to partake.

If we take a look at the bigger picture, it seems that the premise of this article, 'will Esportiva prove themselves a worthy challenger?' will not be solved but for respectively four and six matchdays. First of all, we are looking forward to how the cut-off for the new qualification dessert will turn out. Esportiva could, at least numerically, become a third player at that day, shaking off their cloth of dwarfism. But even more important will be the final resolution of the play-off. Output is the key, the more capitalist nations of our multiverse preach, and in a commercial business such as organised sports, they are spot-on. The pre-play-off scorelines will become a mooth point if only three or two or, god beware, one Esportivan is allowed to present itself on the highest international stage. If, on the other hand, the 'minnows' can rise above themselves, confirming their previous results, we would dare to say that their long battle for recognition will finally pay off. Which of these options it will be, will be determined after the regular qualification stage. The dates of the play-offs are already written in red in the regional agenda. But will these lettres be turned into gold soon, marking the regional confirmation?

XI for Jeru FC - Buyan
Manuel Schmidt
Gabriel Refshauge - Sigurd Tufte - Bronius Bartkus - Kazimieras Zemaitis
Harald Naess - Quinten Zermin
Eero Halmiini - Sverre Devold - Frederik Wallenberg
Elmo Havelund

We'ld dare to say that Sirius Hope stages his best eleven players for this game and they will be needed, looking towards the table. With ambitious players such as Hopp, Knutsen, Smetona, Dalmshelf, Lupeikis and Mattisson on the bench, the team will be sharp and ready.

Article written with a post-MD10 view, for which my apologies.

[Northern Sunrise Islands]

RADIO ESPORTIVA
Season 2, Chapter 3: Catch Me(spirit) If You Can!

Sunrise: So where is it?

Kaza takes off her cap, shows that the Penguin plushy was hidden and smacks Sunrise on the head with it.

Sunrise: Ow, what was that for?
Kaza: For not protecting nature!
Sunrise: Huh?
Kaza: I saw your treehouse, Sunrise! It's not made of green wood!
Sunrise: ...How not? Kitsunia painted it green with her magic!

Kaza smacks him on the head again with the Penguin.

Sunrise: OW!
Kaza: Green Wood means Ecologically correct wood! Recycled wood, if anything!
Sunrise: It's magic. Who cares?

Kaza smacks him on the head again.

Kaza: I do! Now, will you help me go get my plushy?
Sunrise: How much will you pay me?
Kaza: Enough money so that you can replace that dirty wood with proper ecologically correct wood!
Sunrise: So that's a bunch?

Kaza threatens to smack him in the head again, but Sunrise lifts his hands to protect himself.

Sunrise: Fine, Fine! Let's go!

Minutes later, on the Slembanan Gardens.

Capitalia: So... let me, like, see if I get it. You're trying to like, say that you lost like, your plushy here?
Kaza: Yes, miss! Do you know where it is?
Capitalia: Like... no...
Sunrise: Capitalia... I thought you were traveling with the other folks...
Capitalia: Oh, like, you're talking about like, the whole time I was like, off?
Sunrise: Yeah.
Capitalia: Like, Sud brought us this like, nice job working here... So, like, I have been working and living here for a while.
Qlumez: Oh, a barang paling apik sing katon kaya masparat? (Oh, a plushy shaped like a Mespirit?)
Kaza: Uh?
Capitalia: Yeah, Qlumez.
Qlumez: Punika srigala guwa. (It's on the wolves' cave.)
Capitalia: It's, like, on the first cave to the right climbing the mountain.
Kaza: Thanks!
Capitalia: You're, like, welcome.

The duet arrive at the cave, with only small sparks of light. As they finally find something that looks a lot like said plushy, a Wolf suddenly pops up, which causes Kaza to back down, with Sunrise standing on front of the wolf, trying to battle it, punching it on the face. Until...

????: OW! WHAT THE HELL, MAN!?
Sunrise: Huh?
Kaza: Eh, who's that?
Wolfie: It's me, Wolfie! For crying out loud, what the hell is wrong with you people?
Sunrise: ...So, what are you doing here...?
Wolfie: Just resting. Too much noise near my place. Dandi's throwing a party, you see.
Sunrise: Oh. Now that you said it, it does remind me that I should have attended it.
Wolfie: So, what do you folks need?
Kaza: My Azelf Plushy! Give it back!
Wolfie: Eh? No... This is an Uxie plushy. I dunno who it is from, but...

Kaza looks at the plushy, smacks Wolfie in the head with the penguin plushy and runs off. Sunrise quickly follows her, while Wolfie falls to his sleep again.

An hour later, at Kaza's home.

Sunrise: Hah, these cookies are delicious!

Sunrise was eating the whole dish of cookies, while Kaza wept, saddened by the loss of her Mespirit plushy.

Kaza: It was my mom's gift back when I was only 8...
Sunrise: Mrs. Mizu's your mom?
Kaza: Yup! We live together with father whenever he's here.
Sunrise: Well... I think we could at least try to find something to replace it.
Kaza: Still, I... I need to accept defeat and tell mom that my Mespirit plushy has dis-

Mizu, dressed in a red and white dress, passes on front of both Kaza and Sunrise with... the exact same Mespirit plushy.

Kaza: Mespirit! I thought I lost to you!
Mizu: Ooooh... Kaza! Sorry for not telling you that I took your Mespirit for cleaning...
Kaza: Hahahah! I missed you, Mister Mespirit!
Sunrise: Heh... awesome cookies...

As Mizu left to go hang said Mespirit to dry, Kaza picked up a little Tepig safe and handed it to Sunrise.

Kaza: Here you go, thanks for the help!
Sunrise: Hahahah, you're welcome!

As Sunrise left, smiling that he got the money and was avoiding any danger, a penguin plushy hits him in the head.

Kaza: Now go change the wood!
Sunrise: Uh... who?
Hodori: Unyu?
Sunrise: Not you...

---

Lymantatia 3 - 5 Northern Sunrise Islands
Goals:
NSI - Abuda 15', Café 22', Nagatomo 44', Mateus Carvalho 78', Alcouin 90'
LYM - Edward Lowe 30' and 51', Nicholas Baker 60'