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Elfen High 2 (OOC 6, Closed)

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Nightkill the Emperor
Post Kaiser
 
Posts: 88776
Founded: Dec 28, 2009
Ex-Nation

Postby Nightkill the Emperor » Thu May 23, 2013 5:16 pm

“So, fuckers, listen up.” Crowley said calmly. “Jimmy, if you even consider throwing that paper airplane, I will make it so that you cannot even think about your own dick without whimpering and screaming. Now, your normal History teacher is not here today. Therefore, I am left with the attempt of trying to educate you.”

Crowley really did not particularly wish to do this right now. But when you’re left with no other option…And besides, what was his other choice? Paying for a substitute? Pah!

After seeing the terrified expression on Jimmy’s face, Crowley decided that perhaps he did in fact want to do this after all. It was, in hindsight, tremendous fun. “Now, boys and girls, let’s begin on a topic…hmm…I got one. The American War Against Tea.”

“You mean The American Revolution-“ brought up one American student.

“Shut up Yank, I know what I said. The American War against Tea. Now, I was there for a lot of it, seeing the sights in America. And what nice sights they were in many cases. I was even in Boston when the Tea ‘Party’,” The wizard put air quotes around the word “party”. “took place. If I had any idea what was going to transpire there, I would have stopped it. Seeing all that tea wasted…well, I’ll just admit to you now that it was one of my greatest failures. And it was a fixed point in time too, so the man in the telephone booth can’t help…” Crowley saw the confused looks from some of the students.

“Alright, never mind.” He said. “Look, it was an horrific atrocity on the part of the Americans and the British Empire was fully justified in trying to punish them. Just pay the goddamn taxes, Americans, for crying out loud. It’s not that hard.” Crowley sighed. “I did, however, like George Washington. Hell of a wizard.”

“George Washington was a wizard?” the same American kid asked.

"No shit he was." Crowley replied. "How do you think he survived such bizarre events? Though he was not trained at all. Just a lot of potential and untapped power. Now, I was in the Revolution, helping my Brits, but I stopped after I had a dispute with one of the generals. You see, he did not like that I was fucking his mistress. I kindly informed him that I was fucking his mistress and his wife. Then we had a bit of an argument and then I decided the British army could go fuck itself and I went back to Europe. And soon after, the French Revolution started. Ah, now that was a hell of a lot of fun." Crowley laughed. "Well, fun for a while, then you realised that this was a fucking civil war and that all this bloodshed and violence and the Terror...well, I've met men like Robespierre. Robespierre, what a man. Hated the death penalty as a youth, perfected it later on when it suited him."

One boy piped up. "So, what about the American War Ag-" When another girl elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up, this is better."

Crowley waved a piece of chalk vaguely in the air as he continued his memories. "Ah, quite a few interesting things were going on in that time, indeed." he smiled.


"The hell is with this place?" I muttered to himself, walking through the underground of Paris. I knew full well where I was. The Catacombs of Paris, the grave of six million people. "Six million dead...Well, there's a sizeable number." Absentmindedly, I raised a hand, producing a cup with tea.

I proceeded a spoon in the other hand, mixing it with the tea before throwing out the spoon. I walked along while drinking the tea-


"Did you just litter in the Catacombs of Paris?" asked one asshole kid.

"Did you drink tea in the grave of six million people?" asked one American boy not yet well informed about British culture.

"Shut up, I'm telling a story." Crowley snapped back, duct tape finding itself covering the mouths of the two kids speaking.


Walking along while drinking the tea, I was exploring the Catacombs of Paris. I didn't particularly have much else to do at the moment, after all. The Terror had made aboveground Paris interesting, but also something I didn't want to ruin my vacation with.

But then I saw a madman smashing out of a portal in the darkness, a man covered entirely in a cloak. I couldn't see him properly, but he was an asshole. He ended up shoving me and making me drop my tea. I stumbled backwards a bit, looking to see exactly who this bloody bastard was-

But then he disappeared just like that. I pulled out my axe- I loved axes back then, I was an axe man- and looked around. And I felt one bloody bastard coming up behind me, and I sliced him in half with my axe before he could say a word.

I grabbed his upper body, muttering a spell and slamming magic through it to keep him awake. I wanted to talk to the jackass, after all. "Who sent you?" I asked in French. "Who sent you on this suicide mission, hmm?"

Well, then he said something I found interesting. "The universe sent me." he had said to me in English, coughing and spitting once on my face. "The universe sent me to kill the man who calls himself Aleister Crowley."


"So I killed him, of course." Crowley said. "Now, the universe has obviously failed to kill me, no matter what some people might think of that." he grinned. "But let me tell you what happened after."


I ripped off the man's hood, revealing he was a brown-skinned chap. African, perhaps? Haitian revolutionary, maybe. He had a knife and a musket, but he was otherwise unarmed. Don't know how he expected to kill me like that.

But I ripped his head off, quite miffed he and his mate had decided to ruin my tea. That reminded me of his mate. I picked up the dead assassin's knife, looking around for the other man. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" I had yelled. "Come now, don't be shy! You tried to bloody well kill me first, least you can do is come out and do it in the open, hmm?"

Then I saw the other man there, walking out into plain view in front of me. A man I knew and loathed. Last time I met him was centuries prior, in the Great Fire of London. "Dr. John Dee." I said quietly. "We meet again."

RING


RING
"Class time seems done." Crowley noted, hearing the ringing of the bell. "Well then, I suppose you lot should be getting along." He snapped his fingers, removing the duct tape.

"Who's John Dee?" asked one student, now that the tape was off.

"You have the fucking Google thing! You look him up!" barked Crowley. "Now go off, go fuck and masturbate and occasionally study. Your homework is to grow a pair, including the girls. Dismissed!"

After the students left, Crowley gave a laugh. "Ah, Dee..." he muttered. "Hell of a story, how that encounter went. But that's for some other time."
Last edited by Nightkill the Emperor on Thu May 23, 2013 5:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Hi! I'm Khan, your local misanthropic Indian.
I wear teal, blue & pink for Swith.
P2TM RP Discussion Thread
If you want a good rp, read this shit.
Tiami is cool.
Nat: Night's always in some bizarre state somewhere between "intoxicated enough to kill a hair metal lead singer" and "annoying Mormon missionary sober".

Swith: It's because you're so awesome. God himself refreshes the screen before he types just to see if Nightkill has written anything while he was off somewhere else.

Monfrox wrote:
The balkens wrote:
# went there....

It's Nightkill. He's been there so long he rents out rooms to other people at a flat rate, but demands cash up front.

User avatar
Individuality-ness
Post Czar
 
Posts: 37712
Founded: Mar 02, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Individuality-ness » Thu May 23, 2013 5:20 pm

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
“So, fuckers, listen up.” Crowley said calmly. “Jimmy, if you even consider throwing that paper airplane, I will make it so that you cannot even think about your own dick without whimpering and screaming. Now, your normal History teacher is not here today. Therefore, I am left with the attempt of trying to educate you.”

Crowley really did not particularly wish to do this right now. But when you’re left with no other option…And besides, what was his other choice? Paying for a substitute? Pah!

After seeing the terrified expression on Jimmy’s face, Crowley decided that perhaps he did in fact want to do this after all. It was, in hindsight, tremendous fun. “Now, boys and girls, let’s begin on a topic…hmm…I got one. The American War Against Tea.”

“You mean The American Revolution-“ brought up one American student.

“Shut up Yank, I know what I said. The American War against Tea. Now, I was there for a lot of it, seeing the sights in America. And what nice sights they were in many cases. I was even in Boston when the Tea ‘Party’,” The wizard put air quotes around the word “party”. “took place. If I had any idea what was going to transpire there, I would have stopped it. Seeing all that tea wasted…well, I’ll just admit to you now that it was one of my greatest failures. And it was a fixed point in time too, so the man in the telephone booth can’t help…” Crowley saw the confused looks from some of the students.

“Alright, never mind.” He said. “Look, it was an horrific atrocity on the part of the Americans and the British Empire was fully justified in trying to punish them. Just pay the goddamn taxes, Americans, for crying out loud. It’s not that hard.” Crowley sighed. “I did, however, like George Washington. Hell of a wizard.”

“George Washington was a wizard?” the same American kid asked.

"No shit he was." Crowley replied. "How do you think he survived such bizarre events? Though he was not trained at all. Just a lot of potential and untapped power. Now, I was in the Revolution, helping my Brits, but I stopped after I had a dispute with one of the generals. You see, he did not like that I was fucking his mistress. I kindly informed him that I was fucking his mistress and his wife. Then we had a bit of an argument and then I decided the British army could go fuck itself and I went back to Europe. And soon after, the French Revolution started. Ah, now that was a hell of a lot of fun." Crowley laughed. "Well, fun for a while, then you realised that this was a fucking civil war and that all this bloodshed and violence and the Terror...well, I've met men like Robespierre. Robespierre, what a man. Hated the death penalty as a youth, perfected it later on when it suited him."

One boy piped up. "So, what about the American War Ag-" When another girl elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up, this is better."

Crowley waved a piece of chalk vaguely in the air as he continued his memories. "Ah, quite a few interesting things were going on in that time, indeed." he smiled.


"The hell is with this place?" I muttered to himself, walking through the underground of Paris. I knew full well where I was. The Catacombs of Paris, the grave of six million people. "Six million dead...Well, there's a sizeable number." Absentmindedly, I raised a hand, producing a cup with tea.

I proceeded a spoon in the other hand, mixing it with the tea before throwing out the spoon. I walked along while drinking the tea-


"Did you just litter in the Catacombs of Paris?" asked one asshole kid.

"Did you drink tea in the grave of six million people?" asked one American boy not yet well informed about British culture.

"Shut up, I'm telling a story." Crowley snapped back, duct tape finding itself covering the mouths of the two kids speaking.


Walking along while drinking the tea, I was exploring the Catacombs of Paris. I didn't particularly have much else to do at the moment, after all. The Terror had made aboveground Paris interesting, but also something I didn't want to ruin my vacation with.

But then I saw a madman smashing out of a portal in the darkness, a man covered entirely in a cloak. I couldn't see him properly, but he was an asshole. He ended up shoving me and making me drop my tea. I stumbled backwards a bit, looking to see exactly who this bloody bastard was-

But then he disappeared just like that. I pulled out my axe- I loved axes back then, I was an axe man- and looked around. And I felt one bloody bastard coming up behind me, and I sliced him in half with my axe before he could say a word.

I grabbed his upper body, muttering a spell and slamming magic through it to keep him awake. I wanted to talk to the jackass, after all. "Who sent you?" I asked in French. "Who sent you on this suicide mission, hmm?"

Well, then he said something I found interesting. "The universe sent me." he had said to me in English, coughing and spitting once on my face. "The universe sent me to kill the man who calls himself Aleister Crowley."


"So I killed him, of course." Crowley said. "Now, the universe has obviously failed to kill me, no matter what some people might think of that." he grinned. "But let me tell you what happened after."


I ripped off the man's hood, revealing he was a brown-skinned chap. African, perhaps? Haitian revolutionary, maybe. He had a knife and a musket, but he was otherwise unarmed. Don't know how he expected to kill me like that.

But I ripped his head off, quite miffed he and his mate had decided to ruin my tea. That reminded me of his mate. I picked up the dead assassin's knife, looking around for the other man. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" I had yelled. "Come now, don't be shy! You tried to bloody well kill me first, least you can do is come out and do it in the open, hmm?"

Then I saw the other man there, walking out into plain view in front of me. A man I knew and loathed. Last time I met him was centuries prior, in the Great Fire of London. "Dr. John Dee." I said quietly. "We meet again."

RING


RING
"Class time seems done." Crowley noted, hearing the ringing of the bell. "Well then, I suppose you lot should be getting along." He snapped his fingers, removing the duct tape.

"Who's John Dee?" asked one student, now that the tape was off.

"You have the fucking Google thing! You look him up!" barked Crowley. "Now go off, go fuck and masturbate and occasionally study. Your homework is to grow a pair, including the girls. Dismissed!"

After the students left, Crowley gave a laugh. "Ah, Dee..." he muttered. "Hell of a story, how that encounter went. But that's for some other time."

... what the fuck did I just read? O_o
"I should have listened to her, so hard to keep control. We kept on eating but our bloated bellies still not full."
Poetry Thread | How to Not Rape | Aspergers v. Assburgers | You Might be an Altie If... | Factbook/Extension

User avatar
Nationstatelandsville
Khan of Spam
 
Posts: 70969
Founded: Apr 27, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Nationstatelandsville » Thu May 23, 2013 5:24 pm

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
“So, fuckers, listen up.” Crowley said calmly. “Jimmy, if you even consider throwing that paper airplane, I will make it so that you cannot even think about your own dick without whimpering and screaming. Now, your normal History teacher is not here today. Therefore, I am left with the attempt of trying to educate you.”

Crowley really did not particularly wish to do this right now. But when you’re left with no other option…And besides, what was his other choice? Paying for a substitute? Pah!

After seeing the terrified expression on Jimmy’s face, Crowley decided that perhaps he did in fact want to do this after all. It was, in hindsight, tremendous fun. “Now, boys and girls, let’s begin on a topic…hmm…I got one. The American War Against Tea.”

“You mean The American Revolution-“ brought up one American student.

“Shut up Yank, I know what I said. The American War against Tea. Now, I was there for a lot of it, seeing the sights in America. And what nice sights they were in many cases. I was even in Boston when the Tea ‘Party’,” The wizard put air quotes around the word “party”. “took place. If I had any idea what was going to transpire there, I would have stopped it. Seeing all that tea wasted…well, I’ll just admit to you now that it was one of my greatest failures. And it was a fixed point in time too, so the man in the telephone booth can’t help…” Crowley saw the confused looks from some of the students.

“Alright, never mind.” He said. “Look, it was an horrific atrocity on the part of the Americans and the British Empire was fully justified in trying to punish them. Just pay the goddamn taxes, Americans, for crying out loud. It’s not that hard.” Crowley sighed. “I did, however, like George Washington. Hell of a wizard.”

“George Washington was a wizard?” the same American kid asked.

"No shit he was." Crowley replied. "How do you think he survived such bizarre events? Though he was not trained at all. Just a lot of potential and untapped power. Now, I was in the Revolution, helping my Brits, but I stopped after I had a dispute with one of the generals. You see, he did not like that I was fucking his mistress. I kindly informed him that I was fucking his mistress and his wife. Then we had a bit of an argument and then I decided the British army could go fuck itself and I went back to Europe. And soon after, the French Revolution started. Ah, now that was a hell of a lot of fun." Crowley laughed. "Well, fun for a while, then you realised that this was a fucking civil war and that all this bloodshed and violence and the Terror...well, I've met men like Robespierre. Robespierre, what a man. Hated the death penalty as a youth, perfected it later on when it suited him."

One boy piped up. "So, what about the American War Ag-" When another girl elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up, this is better."

Crowley waved a piece of chalk vaguely in the air as he continued his memories. "Ah, quite a few interesting things were going on in that time, indeed." he smiled.


"The hell is with this place?" I muttered to himself, walking through the underground of Paris. I knew full well where I was. The Catacombs of Paris, the grave of six million people. "Six million dead...Well, there's a sizeable number." Absentmindedly, I raised a hand, producing a cup with tea.

I proceeded a spoon in the other hand, mixing it with the tea before throwing out the spoon. I walked along while drinking the tea-


"Did you just litter in the Catacombs of Paris?" asked one asshole kid.

"Did you drink tea in the grave of six million people?" asked one American boy not yet well informed about British culture.

"Shut up, I'm telling a story." Crowley snapped back, duct tape finding itself covering the mouths of the two kids speaking.


Walking along while drinking the tea, I was exploring the Catacombs of Paris. I didn't particularly have much else to do at the moment, after all. The Terror had made aboveground Paris interesting, but also something I didn't want to ruin my vacation with.

But then I saw a madman smashing out of a portal in the darkness, a man covered entirely in a cloak. I couldn't see him properly, but he was an asshole. He ended up shoving me and making me drop my tea. I stumbled backwards a bit, looking to see exactly who this bloody bastard was-

But then he disappeared just like that. I pulled out my axe- I loved axes back then, I was an axe man- and looked around. And I felt one bloody bastard coming up behind me, and I sliced him in half with my axe before he could say a word.

I grabbed his upper body, muttering a spell and slamming magic through it to keep him awake. I wanted to talk to the jackass, after all. "Who sent you?" I asked in French. "Who sent you on this suicide mission, hmm?"

Well, then he said something I found interesting. "The universe sent me." he had said to me in English, coughing and spitting once on my face. "The universe sent me to kill the man who calls himself Aleister Crowley."


"So I killed him, of course." Crowley said. "Now, the universe has obviously failed to kill me, no matter what some people might think of that." he grinned. "But let me tell you what happened after."


I ripped off the man's hood, revealing he was a brown-skinned chap. African, perhaps? Haitian revolutionary, maybe. He had a knife and a musket, but he was otherwise unarmed. Don't know how he expected to kill me like that.

But I ripped his head off, quite miffed he and his mate had decided to ruin my tea. That reminded me of his mate. I picked up the dead assassin's knife, looking around for the other man. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" I had yelled. "Come now, don't be shy! You tried to bloody well kill me first, least you can do is come out and do it in the open, hmm?"

Then I saw the other man there, walking out into plain view in front of me. A man I knew and loathed. Last time I met him was centuries prior, in the Great Fire of London. "Dr. John Dee." I said quietly. "We meet again."

RING


RING
"Class time seems done." Crowley noted, hearing the ringing of the bell. "Well then, I suppose you lot should be getting along." He snapped his fingers, removing the duct tape.

"Who's John Dee?" asked one student, now that the tape was off.

"You have the fucking Google thing! You look him up!" barked Crowley. "Now go off, go fuck and masturbate and occasionally study. Your homework is to grow a pair, including the girls. Dismissed!"

After the students left, Crowley gave a laugh. "Ah, Dee..." he muttered. "Hell of a story, how that encounter went. But that's for some other time."

This is what came up for John Dee.
"Then I was fertilized and grew wise;
From a word to a word I was led to a word,
From a work to a work I was led to a work."
- Odin, Hávamál 138-141, the Poetic Edda, as translated by Dan McCoy.

I enjoy meta-humor and self-deprecation. Annoying, right?

Goodbye.

User avatar
Nightkill the Emperor
Post Kaiser
 
Posts: 88776
Founded: Dec 28, 2009
Ex-Nation

Postby Nightkill the Emperor » Thu May 23, 2013 5:24 pm

Nationstatelandsville wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
“So, fuckers, listen up.” Crowley said calmly. “Jimmy, if you even consider throwing that paper airplane, I will make it so that you cannot even think about your own dick without whimpering and screaming. Now, your normal History teacher is not here today. Therefore, I am left with the attempt of trying to educate you.”

Crowley really did not particularly wish to do this right now. But when you’re left with no other option…And besides, what was his other choice? Paying for a substitute? Pah!

After seeing the terrified expression on Jimmy’s face, Crowley decided that perhaps he did in fact want to do this after all. It was, in hindsight, tremendous fun. “Now, boys and girls, let’s begin on a topic…hmm…I got one. The American War Against Tea.”

“You mean The American Revolution-“ brought up one American student.

“Shut up Yank, I know what I said. The American War against Tea. Now, I was there for a lot of it, seeing the sights in America. And what nice sights they were in many cases. I was even in Boston when the Tea ‘Party’,” The wizard put air quotes around the word “party”. “took place. If I had any idea what was going to transpire there, I would have stopped it. Seeing all that tea wasted…well, I’ll just admit to you now that it was one of my greatest failures. And it was a fixed point in time too, so the man in the telephone booth can’t help…” Crowley saw the confused looks from some of the students.

“Alright, never mind.” He said. “Look, it was an horrific atrocity on the part of the Americans and the British Empire was fully justified in trying to punish them. Just pay the goddamn taxes, Americans, for crying out loud. It’s not that hard.” Crowley sighed. “I did, however, like George Washington. Hell of a wizard.”

“George Washington was a wizard?” the same American kid asked.

"No shit he was." Crowley replied. "How do you think he survived such bizarre events? Though he was not trained at all. Just a lot of potential and untapped power. Now, I was in the Revolution, helping my Brits, but I stopped after I had a dispute with one of the generals. You see, he did not like that I was fucking his mistress. I kindly informed him that I was fucking his mistress and his wife. Then we had a bit of an argument and then I decided the British army could go fuck itself and I went back to Europe. And soon after, the French Revolution started. Ah, now that was a hell of a lot of fun." Crowley laughed. "Well, fun for a while, then you realised that this was a fucking civil war and that all this bloodshed and violence and the Terror...well, I've met men like Robespierre. Robespierre, what a man. Hated the death penalty as a youth, perfected it later on when it suited him."

One boy piped up. "So, what about the American War Ag-" When another girl elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up, this is better."

Crowley waved a piece of chalk vaguely in the air as he continued his memories. "Ah, quite a few interesting things were going on in that time, indeed." he smiled.


"The hell is with this place?" I muttered to himself, walking through the underground of Paris. I knew full well where I was. The Catacombs of Paris, the grave of six million people. "Six million dead...Well, there's a sizeable number." Absentmindedly, I raised a hand, producing a cup with tea.

I proceeded a spoon in the other hand, mixing it with the tea before throwing out the spoon. I walked along while drinking the tea-


"Did you just litter in the Catacombs of Paris?" asked one asshole kid.

"Did you drink tea in the grave of six million people?" asked one American boy not yet well informed about British culture.

"Shut up, I'm telling a story." Crowley snapped back, duct tape finding itself covering the mouths of the two kids speaking.


Walking along while drinking the tea, I was exploring the Catacombs of Paris. I didn't particularly have much else to do at the moment, after all. The Terror had made aboveground Paris interesting, but also something I didn't want to ruin my vacation with.

But then I saw a madman smashing out of a portal in the darkness, a man covered entirely in a cloak. I couldn't see him properly, but he was an asshole. He ended up shoving me and making me drop my tea. I stumbled backwards a bit, looking to see exactly who this bloody bastard was-

But then he disappeared just like that. I pulled out my axe- I loved axes back then, I was an axe man- and looked around. And I felt one bloody bastard coming up behind me, and I sliced him in half with my axe before he could say a word.

I grabbed his upper body, muttering a spell and slamming magic through it to keep him awake. I wanted to talk to the jackass, after all. "Who sent you?" I asked in French. "Who sent you on this suicide mission, hmm?"

Well, then he said something I found interesting. "The universe sent me." he had said to me in English, coughing and spitting once on my face. "The universe sent me to kill the man who calls himself Aleister Crowley."


"So I killed him, of course." Crowley said. "Now, the universe has obviously failed to kill me, no matter what some people might think of that." he grinned. "But let me tell you what happened after."


I ripped off the man's hood, revealing he was a brown-skinned chap. African, perhaps? Haitian revolutionary, maybe. He had a knife and a musket, but he was otherwise unarmed. Don't know how he expected to kill me like that.

But I ripped his head off, quite miffed he and his mate had decided to ruin my tea. That reminded me of his mate. I picked up the dead assassin's knife, looking around for the other man. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" I had yelled. "Come now, don't be shy! You tried to bloody well kill me first, least you can do is come out and do it in the open, hmm?"

Then I saw the other man there, walking out into plain view in front of me. A man I knew and loathed. Last time I met him was centuries prior, in the Great Fire of London. "Dr. John Dee." I said quietly. "We meet again."

RING


RING
"Class time seems done." Crowley noted, hearing the ringing of the bell. "Well then, I suppose you lot should be getting along." He snapped his fingers, removing the duct tape.

"Who's John Dee?" asked one student, now that the tape was off.

"You have the fucking Google thing! You look him up!" barked Crowley. "Now go off, go fuck and masturbate and occasionally study. Your homework is to grow a pair, including the girls. Dismissed!"

After the students left, Crowley gave a laugh. "Ah, Dee..." he muttered. "Hell of a story, how that encounter went. But that's for some other time."

This is what came up for John Dee.

I did not intend that.
Hi! I'm Khan, your local misanthropic Indian.
I wear teal, blue & pink for Swith.
P2TM RP Discussion Thread
If you want a good rp, read this shit.
Tiami is cool.
Nat: Night's always in some bizarre state somewhere between "intoxicated enough to kill a hair metal lead singer" and "annoying Mormon missionary sober".

Swith: It's because you're so awesome. God himself refreshes the screen before he types just to see if Nightkill has written anything while he was off somewhere else.

Monfrox wrote:
The balkens wrote:
# went there....

It's Nightkill. He's been there so long he rents out rooms to other people at a flat rate, but demands cash up front.

User avatar
Nightkill the Emperor
Post Kaiser
 
Posts: 88776
Founded: Dec 28, 2009
Ex-Nation

Postby Nightkill the Emperor » Thu May 23, 2013 5:25 pm

Individuality-ness wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
“So, fuckers, listen up.” Crowley said calmly. “Jimmy, if you even consider throwing that paper airplane, I will make it so that you cannot even think about your own dick without whimpering and screaming. Now, your normal History teacher is not here today. Therefore, I am left with the attempt of trying to educate you.”

Crowley really did not particularly wish to do this right now. But when you’re left with no other option…And besides, what was his other choice? Paying for a substitute? Pah!

After seeing the terrified expression on Jimmy’s face, Crowley decided that perhaps he did in fact want to do this after all. It was, in hindsight, tremendous fun. “Now, boys and girls, let’s begin on a topic…hmm…I got one. The American War Against Tea.”

“You mean The American Revolution-“ brought up one American student.

“Shut up Yank, I know what I said. The American War against Tea. Now, I was there for a lot of it, seeing the sights in America. And what nice sights they were in many cases. I was even in Boston when the Tea ‘Party’,” The wizard put air quotes around the word “party”. “took place. If I had any idea what was going to transpire there, I would have stopped it. Seeing all that tea wasted…well, I’ll just admit to you now that it was one of my greatest failures. And it was a fixed point in time too, so the man in the telephone booth can’t help…” Crowley saw the confused looks from some of the students.

“Alright, never mind.” He said. “Look, it was an horrific atrocity on the part of the Americans and the British Empire was fully justified in trying to punish them. Just pay the goddamn taxes, Americans, for crying out loud. It’s not that hard.” Crowley sighed. “I did, however, like George Washington. Hell of a wizard.”

“George Washington was a wizard?” the same American kid asked.

"No shit he was." Crowley replied. "How do you think he survived such bizarre events? Though he was not trained at all. Just a lot of potential and untapped power. Now, I was in the Revolution, helping my Brits, but I stopped after I had a dispute with one of the generals. You see, he did not like that I was fucking his mistress. I kindly informed him that I was fucking his mistress and his wife. Then we had a bit of an argument and then I decided the British army could go fuck itself and I went back to Europe. And soon after, the French Revolution started. Ah, now that was a hell of a lot of fun." Crowley laughed. "Well, fun for a while, then you realised that this was a fucking civil war and that all this bloodshed and violence and the Terror...well, I've met men like Robespierre. Robespierre, what a man. Hated the death penalty as a youth, perfected it later on when it suited him."

One boy piped up. "So, what about the American War Ag-" When another girl elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up, this is better."

Crowley waved a piece of chalk vaguely in the air as he continued his memories. "Ah, quite a few interesting things were going on in that time, indeed." he smiled.


"The hell is with this place?" I muttered to himself, walking through the underground of Paris. I knew full well where I was. The Catacombs of Paris, the grave of six million people. "Six million dead...Well, there's a sizeable number." Absentmindedly, I raised a hand, producing a cup with tea.

I proceeded a spoon in the other hand, mixing it with the tea before throwing out the spoon. I walked along while drinking the tea-


"Did you just litter in the Catacombs of Paris?" asked one asshole kid.

"Did you drink tea in the grave of six million people?" asked one American boy not yet well informed about British culture.

"Shut up, I'm telling a story." Crowley snapped back, duct tape finding itself covering the mouths of the two kids speaking.


Walking along while drinking the tea, I was exploring the Catacombs of Paris. I didn't particularly have much else to do at the moment, after all. The Terror had made aboveground Paris interesting, but also something I didn't want to ruin my vacation with.

But then I saw a madman smashing out of a portal in the darkness, a man covered entirely in a cloak. I couldn't see him properly, but he was an asshole. He ended up shoving me and making me drop my tea. I stumbled backwards a bit, looking to see exactly who this bloody bastard was-

But then he disappeared just like that. I pulled out my axe- I loved axes back then, I was an axe man- and looked around. And I felt one bloody bastard coming up behind me, and I sliced him in half with my axe before he could say a word.

I grabbed his upper body, muttering a spell and slamming magic through it to keep him awake. I wanted to talk to the jackass, after all. "Who sent you?" I asked in French. "Who sent you on this suicide mission, hmm?"

Well, then he said something I found interesting. "The universe sent me." he had said to me in English, coughing and spitting once on my face. "The universe sent me to kill the man who calls himself Aleister Crowley."


"So I killed him, of course." Crowley said. "Now, the universe has obviously failed to kill me, no matter what some people might think of that." he grinned. "But let me tell you what happened after."


I ripped off the man's hood, revealing he was a brown-skinned chap. African, perhaps? Haitian revolutionary, maybe. He had a knife and a musket, but he was otherwise unarmed. Don't know how he expected to kill me like that.

But I ripped his head off, quite miffed he and his mate had decided to ruin my tea. That reminded me of his mate. I picked up the dead assassin's knife, looking around for the other man. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" I had yelled. "Come now, don't be shy! You tried to bloody well kill me first, least you can do is come out and do it in the open, hmm?"

Then I saw the other man there, walking out into plain view in front of me. A man I knew and loathed. Last time I met him was centuries prior, in the Great Fire of London. "Dr. John Dee." I said quietly. "We meet again."

RING


RING
"Class time seems done." Crowley noted, hearing the ringing of the bell. "Well then, I suppose you lot should be getting along." He snapped his fingers, removing the duct tape.

"Who's John Dee?" asked one student, now that the tape was off.

"You have the fucking Google thing! You look him up!" barked Crowley. "Now go off, go fuck and masturbate and occasionally study. Your homework is to grow a pair, including the girls. Dismissed!"

After the students left, Crowley gave a laugh. "Ah, Dee..." he muttered. "Hell of a story, how that encounter went. But that's for some other time."

... what the fuck did I just read? O_o

Something wonderful.
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# went there....

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Postby Individuality-ness » Thu May 23, 2013 5:31 pm

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
Individuality-ness wrote:... what the fuck did I just read? O_o

Something wonderful.

So Crowley was about to be killed by a mathematician/magician dude from Elizabethan England. Huh.
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Postby Nightkill the Emperor » Thu May 23, 2013 5:32 pm

Individuality-ness wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:Something wonderful.

So Crowley was about to be killed by a mathematician/magician dude from Elizabethan England. Huh.

They've met before.
Hi! I'm Khan, your local misanthropic Indian.
I wear teal, blue & pink for Swith.
P2TM RP Discussion Thread
If you want a good rp, read this shit.
Tiami is cool.
Nat: Night's always in some bizarre state somewhere between "intoxicated enough to kill a hair metal lead singer" and "annoying Mormon missionary sober".

Swith: It's because you're so awesome. God himself refreshes the screen before he types just to see if Nightkill has written anything while he was off somewhere else.

Monfrox wrote:
The balkens wrote:
# went there....

It's Nightkill. He's been there so long he rents out rooms to other people at a flat rate, but demands cash up front.

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Zarkenis Ultima
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Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Zarkenis Ultima » Thu May 23, 2013 5:33 pm

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
“So, fuckers, listen up.” Crowley said calmly. “Jimmy, if you even consider throwing that paper airplane, I will make it so that you cannot even think about your own dick without whimpering and screaming. Now, your normal History teacher is not here today. Therefore, I am left with the attempt of trying to educate you.”

Crowley really did not particularly wish to do this right now. But when you’re left with no other option…And besides, what was his other choice? Paying for a substitute? Pah!

After seeing the terrified expression on Jimmy’s face, Crowley decided that perhaps he did in fact want to do this after all. It was, in hindsight, tremendous fun. “Now, boys and girls, let’s begin on a topic…hmm…I got one. The American War Against Tea.”

“You mean The American Revolution-“ brought up one American student.

“Shut up Yank, I know what I said. The American War against Tea. Now, I was there for a lot of it, seeing the sights in America. And what nice sights they were in many cases. I was even in Boston when the Tea ‘Party’,” The wizard put air quotes around the word “party”. “took place. If I had any idea what was going to transpire there, I would have stopped it. Seeing all that tea wasted…well, I’ll just admit to you now that it was one of my greatest failures. And it was a fixed point in time too, so the man in the telephone booth can’t help…” Crowley saw the confused looks from some of the students.

“Alright, never mind.” He said. “Look, it was an horrific atrocity on the part of the Americans and the British Empire was fully justified in trying to punish them. Just pay the goddamn taxes, Americans, for crying out loud. It’s not that hard.” Crowley sighed. “I did, however, like George Washington. Hell of a wizard.”

“George Washington was a wizard?” the same American kid asked.

"No shit he was." Crowley replied. "How do you think he survived such bizarre events? Though he was not trained at all. Just a lot of potential and untapped power. Now, I was in the Revolution, helping my Brits, but I stopped after I had a dispute with one of the generals. You see, he did not like that I was fucking his mistress. I kindly informed him that I was fucking his mistress and his wife. Then we had a bit of an argument and then I decided the British army could go fuck itself and I went back to Europe. And soon after, the French Revolution started. Ah, now that was a hell of a lot of fun." Crowley laughed. "Well, fun for a while, then you realised that this was a fucking civil war and that all this bloodshed and violence and the Terror...well, I've met men like Robespierre. Robespierre, what a man. Hated the death penalty as a youth, perfected it later on when it suited him."

One boy piped up. "So, what about the American War Ag-" When another girl elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up, this is better."

Crowley waved a piece of chalk vaguely in the air as he continued his memories. "Ah, quite a few interesting things were going on in that time, indeed." he smiled.


"The hell is with this place?" I muttered to himself, walking through the underground of Paris. I knew full well where I was. The Catacombs of Paris, the grave of six million people. "Six million dead...Well, there's a sizeable number." Absentmindedly, I raised a hand, producing a cup with tea.

I proceeded a spoon in the other hand, mixing it with the tea before throwing out the spoon. I walked along while drinking the tea-


"Did you just litter in the Catacombs of Paris?" asked one asshole kid.

"Did you drink tea in the grave of six million people?" asked one American boy not yet well informed about British culture.

"Shut up, I'm telling a story." Crowley snapped back, duct tape finding itself covering the mouths of the two kids speaking.


Walking along while drinking the tea, I was exploring the Catacombs of Paris. I didn't particularly have much else to do at the moment, after all. The Terror had made aboveground Paris interesting, but also something I didn't want to ruin my vacation with.

But then I saw a madman smashing out of a portal in the darkness, a man covered entirely in a cloak. I couldn't see him properly, but he was an asshole. He ended up shoving me and making me drop my tea. I stumbled backwards a bit, looking to see exactly who this bloody bastard was-

But then he disappeared just like that. I pulled out my axe- I loved axes back then, I was an axe man- and looked around. And I felt one bloody bastard coming up behind me, and I sliced him in half with my axe before he could say a word.

I grabbed his upper body, muttering a spell and slamming magic through it to keep him awake. I wanted to talk to the jackass, after all. "Who sent you?" I asked in French. "Who sent you on this suicide mission, hmm?"

Well, then he said something I found interesting. "The universe sent me." he had said to me in English, coughing and spitting once on my face. "The universe sent me to kill the man who calls himself Aleister Crowley."


"So I killed him, of course." Crowley said. "Now, the universe has obviously failed to kill me, no matter what some people might think of that." he grinned. "But let me tell you what happened after."


I ripped off the man's hood, revealing he was a brown-skinned chap. African, perhaps? Haitian revolutionary, maybe. He had a knife and a musket, but he was otherwise unarmed. Don't know how he expected to kill me like that.

But I ripped his head off, quite miffed he and his mate had decided to ruin my tea. That reminded me of his mate. I picked up the dead assassin's knife, looking around for the other man. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" I had yelled. "Come now, don't be shy! You tried to bloody well kill me first, least you can do is come out and do it in the open, hmm?"

Then I saw the other man there, walking out into plain view in front of me. A man I knew and loathed. Last time I met him was centuries prior, in the Great Fire of London. "Dr. John Dee." I said quietly. "We meet again."

RING


RING
"Class time seems done." Crowley noted, hearing the ringing of the bell. "Well then, I suppose you lot should be getting along." He snapped his fingers, removing the duct tape.

"Who's John Dee?" asked one student, now that the tape was off.

"You have the fucking Google thing! You look him up!" barked Crowley. "Now go off, go fuck and masturbate and occasionally study. Your homework is to grow a pair, including the girls. Dismissed!"

After the students left, Crowley gave a laugh. "Ah, Dee..." he muttered. "Hell of a story, how that encounter went. But that's for some other time."


Better than my history classes, that's for sure.
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Postby Individuality-ness » Thu May 23, 2013 5:34 pm

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
Individuality-ness wrote:So Crowley was about to be killed by a mathematician/magician dude from Elizabethan England. Huh.

They've met before.

Ah.
"I should have listened to her, so hard to keep control. We kept on eating but our bloated bellies still not full."
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Nationstatelandsville
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Ex-Nation

Postby Nationstatelandsville » Thu May 23, 2013 5:35 pm

Zarkenis Ultima wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
“So, fuckers, listen up.” Crowley said calmly. “Jimmy, if you even consider throwing that paper airplane, I will make it so that you cannot even think about your own dick without whimpering and screaming. Now, your normal History teacher is not here today. Therefore, I am left with the attempt of trying to educate you.”

Crowley really did not particularly wish to do this right now. But when you’re left with no other option…And besides, what was his other choice? Paying for a substitute? Pah!

After seeing the terrified expression on Jimmy’s face, Crowley decided that perhaps he did in fact want to do this after all. It was, in hindsight, tremendous fun. “Now, boys and girls, let’s begin on a topic…hmm…I got one. The American War Against Tea.”

“You mean The American Revolution-“ brought up one American student.

“Shut up Yank, I know what I said. The American War against Tea. Now, I was there for a lot of it, seeing the sights in America. And what nice sights they were in many cases. I was even in Boston when the Tea ‘Party’,” The wizard put air quotes around the word “party”. “took place. If I had any idea what was going to transpire there, I would have stopped it. Seeing all that tea wasted…well, I’ll just admit to you now that it was one of my greatest failures. And it was a fixed point in time too, so the man in the telephone booth can’t help…” Crowley saw the confused looks from some of the students.

“Alright, never mind.” He said. “Look, it was an horrific atrocity on the part of the Americans and the British Empire was fully justified in trying to punish them. Just pay the goddamn taxes, Americans, for crying out loud. It’s not that hard.” Crowley sighed. “I did, however, like George Washington. Hell of a wizard.”

“George Washington was a wizard?” the same American kid asked.

"No shit he was." Crowley replied. "How do you think he survived such bizarre events? Though he was not trained at all. Just a lot of potential and untapped power. Now, I was in the Revolution, helping my Brits, but I stopped after I had a dispute with one of the generals. You see, he did not like that I was fucking his mistress. I kindly informed him that I was fucking his mistress and his wife. Then we had a bit of an argument and then I decided the British army could go fuck itself and I went back to Europe. And soon after, the French Revolution started. Ah, now that was a hell of a lot of fun." Crowley laughed. "Well, fun for a while, then you realised that this was a fucking civil war and that all this bloodshed and violence and the Terror...well, I've met men like Robespierre. Robespierre, what a man. Hated the death penalty as a youth, perfected it later on when it suited him."

One boy piped up. "So, what about the American War Ag-" When another girl elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up, this is better."

Crowley waved a piece of chalk vaguely in the air as he continued his memories. "Ah, quite a few interesting things were going on in that time, indeed." he smiled.


"The hell is with this place?" I muttered to himself, walking through the underground of Paris. I knew full well where I was. The Catacombs of Paris, the grave of six million people. "Six million dead...Well, there's a sizeable number." Absentmindedly, I raised a hand, producing a cup with tea.

I proceeded a spoon in the other hand, mixing it with the tea before throwing out the spoon. I walked along while drinking the tea-


"Did you just litter in the Catacombs of Paris?" asked one asshole kid.

"Did you drink tea in the grave of six million people?" asked one American boy not yet well informed about British culture.

"Shut up, I'm telling a story." Crowley snapped back, duct tape finding itself covering the mouths of the two kids speaking.


Walking along while drinking the tea, I was exploring the Catacombs of Paris. I didn't particularly have much else to do at the moment, after all. The Terror had made aboveground Paris interesting, but also something I didn't want to ruin my vacation with.

But then I saw a madman smashing out of a portal in the darkness, a man covered entirely in a cloak. I couldn't see him properly, but he was an asshole. He ended up shoving me and making me drop my tea. I stumbled backwards a bit, looking to see exactly who this bloody bastard was-

But then he disappeared just like that. I pulled out my axe- I loved axes back then, I was an axe man- and looked around. And I felt one bloody bastard coming up behind me, and I sliced him in half with my axe before he could say a word.

I grabbed his upper body, muttering a spell and slamming magic through it to keep him awake. I wanted to talk to the jackass, after all. "Who sent you?" I asked in French. "Who sent you on this suicide mission, hmm?"

Well, then he said something I found interesting. "The universe sent me." he had said to me in English, coughing and spitting once on my face. "The universe sent me to kill the man who calls himself Aleister Crowley."


"So I killed him, of course." Crowley said. "Now, the universe has obviously failed to kill me, no matter what some people might think of that." he grinned. "But let me tell you what happened after."


I ripped off the man's hood, revealing he was a brown-skinned chap. African, perhaps? Haitian revolutionary, maybe. He had a knife and a musket, but he was otherwise unarmed. Don't know how he expected to kill me like that.

But I ripped his head off, quite miffed he and his mate had decided to ruin my tea. That reminded me of his mate. I picked up the dead assassin's knife, looking around for the other man. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" I had yelled. "Come now, don't be shy! You tried to bloody well kill me first, least you can do is come out and do it in the open, hmm?"

Then I saw the other man there, walking out into plain view in front of me. A man I knew and loathed. Last time I met him was centuries prior, in the Great Fire of London. "Dr. John Dee." I said quietly. "We meet again."

RING


RING
"Class time seems done." Crowley noted, hearing the ringing of the bell. "Well then, I suppose you lot should be getting along." He snapped his fingers, removing the duct tape.

"Who's John Dee?" asked one student, now that the tape was off.

"You have the fucking Google thing! You look him up!" barked Crowley. "Now go off, go fuck and masturbate and occasionally study. Your homework is to grow a pair, including the girls. Dismissed!"

After the students left, Crowley gave a laugh. "Ah, Dee..." he muttered. "Hell of a story, how that encounter went. But that's for some other time."


Better than my history classes, that's for sure.

We all know Lewis Jameson was the best History teacher ever born.

Well, modern history.
"Then I was fertilized and grew wise;
From a word to a word I was led to a word,
From a work to a work I was led to a work."
- Odin, Hávamál 138-141, the Poetic Edda, as translated by Dan McCoy.

I enjoy meta-humor and self-deprecation. Annoying, right?

Goodbye.

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Zarkenis Ultima
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Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Zarkenis Ultima » Thu May 23, 2013 5:35 pm

Nationstatelandsville wrote:
Zarkenis Ultima wrote:
Better than my history classes, that's for sure.

We all know Lewis Jameson was the best History teacher ever born.

Well, modern history.


I thought he did math and geography. :P.
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Nationstatelandsville
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Postby Nationstatelandsville » Thu May 23, 2013 5:37 pm

Zarkenis Ultima wrote:
Nationstatelandsville wrote:We all know Lewis Jameson was the best History teacher ever born.

Well, modern history.


I thought he did math and geography. :P.

No one told him.
"Then I was fertilized and grew wise;
From a word to a word I was led to a word,
From a work to a work I was led to a work."
- Odin, Hávamál 138-141, the Poetic Edda, as translated by Dan McCoy.

I enjoy meta-humor and self-deprecation. Annoying, right?

Goodbye.

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Postby Astrolinium » Thu May 23, 2013 5:39 pm

So when my mom was little she apparently got kicked out of the girl scouts for being a smartass.
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Nationstatelandsville
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Postby Nationstatelandsville » Thu May 23, 2013 5:39 pm

Astrolinium wrote:So when my mom was little she apparently got kicked out of the girl scouts for being a smartass.

Funny, the same thing happened to me.

(nods)
"Then I was fertilized and grew wise;
From a word to a word I was led to a word,
From a work to a work I was led to a work."
- Odin, Hávamál 138-141, the Poetic Edda, as translated by Dan McCoy.

I enjoy meta-humor and self-deprecation. Annoying, right?

Goodbye.

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Nightkill the Emperor
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Founded: Dec 28, 2009
Ex-Nation

Postby Nightkill the Emperor » Thu May 23, 2013 5:40 pm

Zarkenis Ultima wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
“So, fuckers, listen up.” Crowley said calmly. “Jimmy, if you even consider throwing that paper airplane, I will make it so that you cannot even think about your own dick without whimpering and screaming. Now, your normal History teacher is not here today. Therefore, I am left with the attempt of trying to educate you.”

Crowley really did not particularly wish to do this right now. But when you’re left with no other option…And besides, what was his other choice? Paying for a substitute? Pah!

After seeing the terrified expression on Jimmy’s face, Crowley decided that perhaps he did in fact want to do this after all. It was, in hindsight, tremendous fun. “Now, boys and girls, let’s begin on a topic…hmm…I got one. The American War Against Tea.”

“You mean The American Revolution-“ brought up one American student.

“Shut up Yank, I know what I said. The American War against Tea. Now, I was there for a lot of it, seeing the sights in America. And what nice sights they were in many cases. I was even in Boston when the Tea ‘Party’,” The wizard put air quotes around the word “party”. “took place. If I had any idea what was going to transpire there, I would have stopped it. Seeing all that tea wasted…well, I’ll just admit to you now that it was one of my greatest failures. And it was a fixed point in time too, so the man in the telephone booth can’t help…” Crowley saw the confused looks from some of the students.

“Alright, never mind.” He said. “Look, it was an horrific atrocity on the part of the Americans and the British Empire was fully justified in trying to punish them. Just pay the goddamn taxes, Americans, for crying out loud. It’s not that hard.” Crowley sighed. “I did, however, like George Washington. Hell of a wizard.”

“George Washington was a wizard?” the same American kid asked.

"No shit he was." Crowley replied. "How do you think he survived such bizarre events? Though he was not trained at all. Just a lot of potential and untapped power. Now, I was in the Revolution, helping my Brits, but I stopped after I had a dispute with one of the generals. You see, he did not like that I was fucking his mistress. I kindly informed him that I was fucking his mistress and his wife. Then we had a bit of an argument and then I decided the British army could go fuck itself and I went back to Europe. And soon after, the French Revolution started. Ah, now that was a hell of a lot of fun." Crowley laughed. "Well, fun for a while, then you realised that this was a fucking civil war and that all this bloodshed and violence and the Terror...well, I've met men like Robespierre. Robespierre, what a man. Hated the death penalty as a youth, perfected it later on when it suited him."

One boy piped up. "So, what about the American War Ag-" When another girl elbowed him in the ribs.

"Shut up, this is better."

Crowley waved a piece of chalk vaguely in the air as he continued his memories. "Ah, quite a few interesting things were going on in that time, indeed." he smiled.


"The hell is with this place?" I muttered to himself, walking through the underground of Paris. I knew full well where I was. The Catacombs of Paris, the grave of six million people. "Six million dead...Well, there's a sizeable number." Absentmindedly, I raised a hand, producing a cup with tea.

I proceeded a spoon in the other hand, mixing it with the tea before throwing out the spoon. I walked along while drinking the tea-


"Did you just litter in the Catacombs of Paris?" asked one asshole kid.

"Did you drink tea in the grave of six million people?" asked one American boy not yet well informed about British culture.

"Shut up, I'm telling a story." Crowley snapped back, duct tape finding itself covering the mouths of the two kids speaking.


Walking along while drinking the tea, I was exploring the Catacombs of Paris. I didn't particularly have much else to do at the moment, after all. The Terror had made aboveground Paris interesting, but also something I didn't want to ruin my vacation with.

But then I saw a madman smashing out of a portal in the darkness, a man covered entirely in a cloak. I couldn't see him properly, but he was an asshole. He ended up shoving me and making me drop my tea. I stumbled backwards a bit, looking to see exactly who this bloody bastard was-

But then he disappeared just like that. I pulled out my axe- I loved axes back then, I was an axe man- and looked around. And I felt one bloody bastard coming up behind me, and I sliced him in half with my axe before he could say a word.

I grabbed his upper body, muttering a spell and slamming magic through it to keep him awake. I wanted to talk to the jackass, after all. "Who sent you?" I asked in French. "Who sent you on this suicide mission, hmm?"

Well, then he said something I found interesting. "The universe sent me." he had said to me in English, coughing and spitting once on my face. "The universe sent me to kill the man who calls himself Aleister Crowley."


"So I killed him, of course." Crowley said. "Now, the universe has obviously failed to kill me, no matter what some people might think of that." he grinned. "But let me tell you what happened after."


I ripped off the man's hood, revealing he was a brown-skinned chap. African, perhaps? Haitian revolutionary, maybe. He had a knife and a musket, but he was otherwise unarmed. Don't know how he expected to kill me like that.

But I ripped his head off, quite miffed he and his mate had decided to ruin my tea. That reminded me of his mate. I picked up the dead assassin's knife, looking around for the other man. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" I had yelled. "Come now, don't be shy! You tried to bloody well kill me first, least you can do is come out and do it in the open, hmm?"

Then I saw the other man there, walking out into plain view in front of me. A man I knew and loathed. Last time I met him was centuries prior, in the Great Fire of London. "Dr. John Dee." I said quietly. "We meet again."

RING


RING
"Class time seems done." Crowley noted, hearing the ringing of the bell. "Well then, I suppose you lot should be getting along." He snapped his fingers, removing the duct tape.

"Who's John Dee?" asked one student, now that the tape was off.

"You have the fucking Google thing! You look him up!" barked Crowley. "Now go off, go fuck and masturbate and occasionally study. Your homework is to grow a pair, including the girls. Dismissed!"

After the students left, Crowley gave a laugh. "Ah, Dee..." he muttered. "Hell of a story, how that encounter went. But that's for some other time."


Better than my history classes, that's for sure.

Crowley sat down, looking out at the Mexican history class he had "volunteered" to teach. It had been an odd occurrence on how he got here, but that was a different story.

"He traido los pasaportes de los Estados Unidos." he said bluntly, throwing them out to the now very happy crowd of students. "Ahora, ustedes pueden salir de Mexico."

There was a massive party and Crowley was remembered forever among those happy students.
Hi! I'm Khan, your local misanthropic Indian.
I wear teal, blue & pink for Swith.
P2TM RP Discussion Thread
If you want a good rp, read this shit.
Tiami is cool.
Nat: Night's always in some bizarre state somewhere between "intoxicated enough to kill a hair metal lead singer" and "annoying Mormon missionary sober".

Swith: It's because you're so awesome. God himself refreshes the screen before he types just to see if Nightkill has written anything while he was off somewhere else.

Monfrox wrote:
The balkens wrote:
# went there....

It's Nightkill. He's been there so long he rents out rooms to other people at a flat rate, but demands cash up front.

User avatar
Nationstatelandsville
Khan of Spam
 
Posts: 70969
Founded: Apr 27, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Nationstatelandsville » Thu May 23, 2013 5:41 pm

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
Zarkenis Ultima wrote:
Better than my history classes, that's for sure.

Crowley sat down, looking out at the Mexican history class he had "volunteered" to teach. It had been an odd occurrence on how he got here, but that was a different story.

"He traido los pasaportes de los Estados Unidos." he said bluntly, throwing them out to the now very happy crowd of students. "Ahora, ustedes pueden salir de Mexico."

There was a massive party and Crowley was remembered forever among those happy students.

Nat's Internal Monologue: "Salir? Well, fuck. I failed that test."
"Then I was fertilized and grew wise;
From a word to a word I was led to a word,
From a work to a work I was led to a work."
- Odin, Hávamál 138-141, the Poetic Edda, as translated by Dan McCoy.

I enjoy meta-humor and self-deprecation. Annoying, right?

Goodbye.

User avatar
Individuality-ness
Post Czar
 
Posts: 37712
Founded: Mar 02, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Individuality-ness » Thu May 23, 2013 5:42 pm

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
Zarkenis Ultima wrote:Better than my history classes, that's for sure.

Crowley sat down, looking out at the Mexican history class he had "volunteered" to teach. It had been an odd occurrence on how he got here, but that was a different story.

"He traido los pasaportes de los Estados Unidos." he said bluntly, throwing them out to the now very happy crowd of students. "Ahora, ustedes pueden salir de Mexico."

There was a massive party and Crowley was remembered forever among those happy students.

How did Crowley amass that number of passports for them? And how did he individualize them for each student?
"I should have listened to her, so hard to keep control. We kept on eating but our bloated bellies still not full."
Poetry Thread | How to Not Rape | Aspergers v. Assburgers | You Might be an Altie If... | Factbook/Extension

User avatar
Nationstatelandsville
Khan of Spam
 
Posts: 70969
Founded: Apr 27, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Nationstatelandsville » Thu May 23, 2013 5:43 pm

Individuality-ness wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
Crowley sat down, looking out at the Mexican history class he had "volunteered" to teach. It had been an odd occurrence on how he got here, but that was a different story.

"He traido los pasaportes de los Estados Unidos." he said bluntly, throwing them out to the now very happy crowd of students. "Ahora, ustedes pueden salir de Mexico."

There was a massive party and Crowley was remembered forever among those happy students.

How did Crowley amass that number of passports for them? And how did he individualize them for each student?

Fucking magic.

Literally.
"Then I was fertilized and grew wise;
From a word to a word I was led to a word,
From a work to a work I was led to a work."
- Odin, Hávamál 138-141, the Poetic Edda, as translated by Dan McCoy.

I enjoy meta-humor and self-deprecation. Annoying, right?

Goodbye.

User avatar
Individuality-ness
Post Czar
 
Posts: 37712
Founded: Mar 02, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Individuality-ness » Thu May 23, 2013 5:43 pm

Nationstatelandsville wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
Crowley sat down, looking out at the Mexican history class he had "volunteered" to teach. It had been an odd occurrence on how he got here, but that was a different story.

"He traido los pasaportes de los Estados Unidos." he said bluntly, throwing them out to the now very happy crowd of students. "Ahora, ustedes pueden salir de Mexico."

There was a massive party and Crowley was remembered forever among those happy students.

Nat's Internal Monologue: "Salir? Well, fuck. I failed that test."

Translation: Crowley gives them all US passports to leave Mexico and go the the US.

Nationstatelandsville wrote:
Individuality-ness wrote:How did Crowley amass that number of passports for them? And how did he individualize them for each student?

Fucking magic.

Literally.

Explains a lot.
"I should have listened to her, so hard to keep control. We kept on eating but our bloated bellies still not full."
Poetry Thread | How to Not Rape | Aspergers v. Assburgers | You Might be an Altie If... | Factbook/Extension

User avatar
Nightkill the Emperor
Post Kaiser
 
Posts: 88776
Founded: Dec 28, 2009
Ex-Nation

Postby Nightkill the Emperor » Thu May 23, 2013 5:43 pm

Individuality-ness wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
Crowley sat down, looking out at the Mexican history class he had "volunteered" to teach. It had been an odd occurrence on how he got here, but that was a different story.

"He traido los pasaportes de los Estados Unidos." he said bluntly, throwing them out to the now very happy crowd of students. "Ahora, ustedes pueden salir de Mexico."

There was a massive party and Crowley was remembered forever among those happy students.

How did Crowley amass that number of passports for them? And how did he individualize them for each student?

Jodete, that's how.
Hi! I'm Khan, your local misanthropic Indian.
I wear teal, blue & pink for Swith.
P2TM RP Discussion Thread
If you want a good rp, read this shit.
Tiami is cool.
Nat: Night's always in some bizarre state somewhere between "intoxicated enough to kill a hair metal lead singer" and "annoying Mormon missionary sober".

Swith: It's because you're so awesome. God himself refreshes the screen before he types just to see if Nightkill has written anything while he was off somewhere else.

Monfrox wrote:
The balkens wrote:
# went there....

It's Nightkill. He's been there so long he rents out rooms to other people at a flat rate, but demands cash up front.

User avatar
Nationstatelandsville
Khan of Spam
 
Posts: 70969
Founded: Apr 27, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Nationstatelandsville » Thu May 23, 2013 5:44 pm

Individuality-ness wrote:
Nationstatelandsville wrote:Nat's Internal Monologue: "Salir? Well, fuck. I failed that test."

Translation: Crowley gives them all US passports to leave Mexico and go the the US.

I know, I'm capable of inference.
"Then I was fertilized and grew wise;
From a word to a word I was led to a word,
From a work to a work I was led to a work."
- Odin, Hávamál 138-141, the Poetic Edda, as translated by Dan McCoy.

I enjoy meta-humor and self-deprecation. Annoying, right?

Goodbye.

User avatar
Individuality-ness
Post Czar
 
Posts: 37712
Founded: Mar 02, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Individuality-ness » Thu May 23, 2013 5:44 pm

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:
Individuality-ness wrote:How did Crowley amass that number of passports for them? And how did he individualize them for each student?

Jodete, that's how.

Should I ask for more information or would that violate NC-17?
"I should have listened to her, so hard to keep control. We kept on eating but our bloated bellies still not full."
Poetry Thread | How to Not Rape | Aspergers v. Assburgers | You Might be an Altie If... | Factbook/Extension

User avatar
Individuality-ness
Post Czar
 
Posts: 37712
Founded: Mar 02, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Individuality-ness » Thu May 23, 2013 5:45 pm

Nationstatelandsville wrote:
Individuality-ness wrote:Translation: Crowley gives them all US passports to leave Mexico and go the the US.

I know, I'm capable of inference.

I'm bored. It was a good exercise.
"I should have listened to her, so hard to keep control. We kept on eating but our bloated bellies still not full."
Poetry Thread | How to Not Rape | Aspergers v. Assburgers | You Might be an Altie If... | Factbook/Extension

User avatar
Nationstatelandsville
Khan of Spam
 
Posts: 70969
Founded: Apr 27, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Nationstatelandsville » Thu May 23, 2013 5:45 pm

Individuality-ness wrote:
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:Jodete, that's how.

Should I ask for more information or would that violate NC-17?

NC-17 was indeed violated, with several different fruit.
"Then I was fertilized and grew wise;
From a word to a word I was led to a word,
From a work to a work I was led to a work."
- Odin, Hávamál 138-141, the Poetic Edda, as translated by Dan McCoy.

I enjoy meta-humor and self-deprecation. Annoying, right?

Goodbye.

User avatar
Individuality-ness
Post Czar
 
Posts: 37712
Founded: Mar 02, 2011
Ex-Nation

Postby Individuality-ness » Thu May 23, 2013 5:46 pm

Nationstatelandsville wrote:
Individuality-ness wrote:Should I ask for more information or would that violate NC-17?

NC-17 was indeed violated, with several different fruit.

Does this happen to include duran and pineapples?
"I should have listened to her, so hard to keep control. We kept on eating but our bloated bellies still not full."
Poetry Thread | How to Not Rape | Aspergers v. Assburgers | You Might be an Altie If... | Factbook/Extension

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