Elfen High 2 (OOC 6, Closed)

[Individuality-ness]

On a different note, there is absolutely no reason for me to be reading BBC in Spanish and French. I'm not going to really use these languages again.

This is how I often amuse myself.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

On a different note, there is absolutely no reason for me to be reading BBC in Spanish and French. I'm not going to really use these languages again.

This is how I often amuse myself.

I like to refresh my languages on the side, just in case they may come in handy.

Speaking of which, those of you (Nat, Ende) who take Spanish or French should read BBC in those languages. It would be a brilliant way to actually learn the language rather than whatever shitty thing you do in school.

[Zarkenis Ultima]

I like to refresh my languages on the side, just in case they may come in handy.

Speaking of which, those of you (Nat, Ende) who take Spanish or French should read BBC in those languages. It would be a brilliant way to actually learn the language rather than whatever shitty thing you do in school.

Like I did.

.

[Individuality-ness]

I like to refresh my languages on the side, just in case they may come in handy.

Speaking of which, those of you (Nat, Ende) who take Spanish or French should read BBC in those languages. It would be a brilliant way to actually learn the language rather than whatever shitty thing you do in school.

Makes sense. Now if only they offered in in Latin...

[Nationstatelandsville]

I like to refresh my languages on the side, just in case they may come in handy.

Speaking of which, those of you (Nat, Ende) who take Spanish or French should read BBC in those languages. It would be a brilliant way to actually learn the language rather than whatever shitty thing you do in school.

"You meant to use afetairme here, Jon."

"...Oh."

"Yup."

"This is literally the first time in my life I have ever seen this."

"Well, it's quite a common part of the Spanish language."

"And, yet, I have somehow gone through five years of Spanish education without ever once seeing this before. Either you're fucking morons or making this shit up to piss me off."

[Nightkill the Emperor]

I like to refresh my languages on the side, just in case they may come in handy.

Speaking of which, those of you (Nat, Ende) who take Spanish or French should read BBC in those languages. It would be a brilliant way to actually learn the language rather than whatever shitty thing you do in school.

Like I did.

.

Por supuesto, tu no puedes hablar ingles vale una mierda.

[Zarkenis Ultima]

Like I did.

.

Por supuesto, tu no puedes hablar ingles vale una mierda.

I don't think I'm that bad, but yeah, spoken English is not my forte. .

@Nat: You made a typo. .

[Nightkill the Emperor]

I like to refresh my languages on the side, just in case they may come in handy.

Speaking of which, those of you (Nat, Ende) who take Spanish or French should read BBC in those languages. It would be a brilliant way to actually learn the language rather than whatever shitty thing you do in school.

"You meant to use afetairme here, Jon."

"...Oh."

"Yup."

"This is literally the first time in my life I have ever seen this."

"Well, it's quite a common part of the Spanish language."

"And, yet, I have somehow gone through five years of Spanish education without ever once seeing this before. Either you're fucking morons or making this shit up to piss me off."

Escuelas estadounidenses son estupidos.

En serio, yo soy indio. No aprendi espanol en una clase. Todavia se mas espanol que tu.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/mundo/
http://www.studyspanish.com/

En serio, es muy triste.

[Nationstatelandsville]

"You meant to use afetairme here, Jon."

"...Oh."

"Yup."

"This is literally the first time in my life I have ever seen this."

"Well, it's quite a common part of the Spanish language."

"And, yet, I have somehow gone through five years of Spanish education without ever once seeing this before. Either you're fucking morons or making this shit up to piss me off."

Escuelas estadounidenses son estupidos.

En serio, yo soy indio. No aprendi espanol en una clase. Todavia se mas espanol que tu.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/mundo/
http://www.studyspanish.com/

En serio, es muy triste.

You sound like a four-year-old in Spanish.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Escuelas estadounidenses son estupidos.

En serio, yo soy indio. No aprendi espanol en una clase. Todavia se mas espanol que tu.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/mundo/
http://www.studyspanish.com/

En serio, es muy triste.

You sound like a four-year-old in Spanish.

My swearing in Spanish isn't as good as it is in my other languages.

And my Spanish is still better than yours, bahenchod.

[Nationstatelandsville]

You sound like a four-year-old in Spanish.

My swearing in Spanish isn't as good as it is in my other languages.

And my Spanish is still better than yours, bahenchod.

I know precisely eight people who are not white.

Eight.

It's a miracle I speak English.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

My swearing in Spanish isn't as good as it is in my other languages.

And my Spanish is still better than yours, bahenchod.

I know precisely eight people who are not white.

Eight.

It's a miracle I speak English.

When I was a lad, I didn't know any white people, yet I learned English.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Words cannot express how much I'll miss the clothing.

When I was a lad, nobody wore jeans or t-shirts.

Now, everyone wears them. I get funny looks when I go out in traditional clothing.

Although it varies. The young people look at me sympathically, the old people go "Ah, look at those whippersnappers" and I go "...I'm not old yet..."

So now I'm forced to wear jeans and t-shirts.

Apparently you can become Catholic if you just get baptised and stay that way until excommunication.

When I was a drunken lad, I once burst into a church and fell into that baptism bowl thing.

Guys, I might be Catholic.

These are the other times I have said "When I was a lad".

[Zarkenis Ultima]

When I was a lad, nobody wore jeans or t-shirts.

Now, everyone wears them. I get funny looks when I go out in traditional clothing.

Although it varies. The young people look at me sympathically, the old people go "Ah, look at those whippersnappers" and I go "...I'm not old yet..."

So now I'm forced to wear jeans and t-shirts.

Apparently you can become Catholic if you just get baptised and stay that way until excommunication.

When I was a drunken lad, I once burst into a church and fell into that baptism bowl thing.

Guys, I might be Catholic.

These are the other times I have said "When I was a lad".

[Nationstatelandsville]

BEARS


Ursidae family

You know your crippling fear of bears? No? You don't have one?

Then you're either a.) a fucking liar, b.) already dead, or c.) a Jameson (spoiler: you're not a Jameson).

The bear race is made up of all the many myriad species of bear - including several that no man has seen and survived - who now think of themselves as a single species and nation. Bears tend to dwell on the fringes of human society, save a select few who take human form (they can do that kind of shit) and those that simply do not give a single fuck and go wherever the fuck they want. It is important to note that every single goddamn one fits that description.

Bears, on their hind-legs, are about a head taller than your average human. They're very bulky animals, with more rippling muscle and fat than both 1980's and 2010's Schwarzenegger and are the most massive members of the Carnivora order, which you may recognize as an order that clearly does not include Wal-Mart customers. Males tend to be larger than females, which is only so the females can more easily tear off the males' genitals when they act up. The largest species of bears, the Kodiak, have been weighed at 750+ kg, because God is dead. The lightest bears - females of the sun variety - have been weighed at only 20 kg. This is a ruse to make you feel safe. Bears have thick coats of fur ranging in color from black to brown to white. When shaven, bears become nightmare - another reason one should never Google the phrase "shaved bear" while researching for a bestiary entry. They are many, many more and all of them are penis. While technically quadrupeds, bears can also stand on their back legs and walk around like bipeds, as if to mock your puny existence before consuming everything you've ever known in a void of darkness and hatred. Bears have unusually small teeth, because they enjoy a challenge. They consume omnivorous diets, mainly fish and vegetation, but also screams on the occasion that they happen upon a being intelligent to recognize its doom. They love that shit. Bears tend to live in forests and related ecosystems, much like you, because fuck you. These forests are almost universally in the Northern Hemisphere, save for the spectacled bear (the gayest of all bears - yes, even them), which lives amongst the Andes, scaring the shit out of unsuspecting fools who move to the Andes to escape the bear menace. There was once a species of African bears (living in areas prone to violent revolution as of late, which is the opposite of a coincidence) called the Atlas, but they were "killed off" in the 1870's. In reality, they are simply waiting in their bunkers for Theodore Roosevelt to finally die. No other species has forayed below the equator, because bears are racist. Like, really, really racist. Bears are also fucking magical, by virtue of telling logic to fuck right the hell off. They can do basically whatever the fuck they want, but maintain a semblance of fairness in order to make you piss that much more whenever you see a fucking bear wizard hurling fucking lightning-bolts at you.

Oh, and did you know that bears can fucking climb trees? That shouldn't even be goddamn possible with their awkward little paws, but they do it anyways. There is literally no escape.

Bears are universally diurnal, to remind you that they are always waiting. Bears are a mainly asocial species, because even bears are fucking terrified of bears. Regardless, bears are also a very proud species, because they personally tore out love's throat while Australia held it down. Do not piss a bear off. If you do, you will live, because that is the worst possible fate. They will never forget. Never forgive. Never leave. They will follow you to the fucking ends of the earth, simply watching, simply reminding you that they exist. If you come near death, they will save you. If you try to commit suicide, they will stop you. If you are attacked, they will protect you. Because death would be a comfort. Death would be an escape from their hatred, their burning fury that will turn even the greatest of joys int ash. They will never hurt you. Their very existence is enough. Bears are, unsurprisingly, a quite war-like species that enjoys kicking ass. The bear military is the only thing in the bear government resembling competent or, in many cases, existent.

Bear history is long, longer than ours, and just as boring. In summary, bears were once a divided race that stuck together based on species or families, settling into clans that ruled certain territories. By far, the most powerful was the Grizzly clan, which ruled over the entirety of North America until 29 AD. The Grizzlies were a powerful military and stealth force, often dubbed "bear-ninjas" by men who have the balls to degrade bears by comparing them to humans. While reigning, the Grizzlies imposed massive tariffs on any sea trade passing through their territory, which their powerful military ensured was all the sea trade. This pissed off other clans, who formed the Alliance of Bears for Justice in 24 AD (consisting of twenty clans) and went to war with the Grizzlies. The Grizzlies dominated until the faithful morning of October 19th, 29 AD, when they, in a routine check, interrupted polar bear pirate captain Polarbeard in the middle of his morning orgy. Within the hour, there were two Grizzlies left in existence, who surrendered unanimously. The Alliance accepted these survivors and formed a massive bear government - the United Bear Republics - and their war became known as the War for Republican Unification. The United Bear Republics now include all known (and unknown) bear species and are ruled over by the Bear King. There have been four Bear Kings - Polarbeard (serving from the end of the war until whenever the fuck he wanted), some random asshole, the human Lewis Jameson, and the current Bear King Forestburner. The Bear King controls the military, while legislative duties are handled by the Bear Council, which consists of elected representatives from various world regions. The High Echelons of the Bear Council - the UBR's equivalent to the Supreme Court - is made up of a dozen of the greatest war heroes in modern bear history, as selected by the other Echelons. The Bear King himself is then chosen by the Echelons from one of their numbers. However, bear society is largely anarchic, and very few bears pretend to give a shit.

In synopsis, if you ever see a bear, then it has already seen (and killed) you. Good fucking luck, pal.

[Individuality-ness]

BEARS

<snip>

Nat, did you have a lot of time to kill?

[Nationstatelandsville]

BEARS

<snip>

Nat, did you have a lot of time to kill?

That took twenty minutes.

I wrote a single one-shot that took three weeks of continuous.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Added to fourth post.

[Individuality-ness]

Nat, did you have a lot of time to kill?

That took twenty minutes.

I wrote a single one-shot that took three weeks of continuous.

I usually wrote my one-shots in about half an hour to an hour.

[The Inritus Extraho]

Added to fourth post.

hey
hey
hey
pester
pesting you
post as Sanchez please?

[Nationstatelandsville]

That took twenty minutes.

I wrote a single one-shot that took three weeks of continuous.

I usually wrote my one-shots in about half an hour to an hour.

Bearing in mind that this one-shot is about 12000 words long and took eight hours of watching old 1970's Doctor Who serials for research purposes.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Added to fourth post.

hey
hey
hey
pester
pesting you
post as Sanchez please?

Relax, person who was absent for months, I'll get to it.

[The Inritus Extraho]

Relax, person who was absent for months, I'll get to it.

I was waiting for you to add her back in!
You never would have if I didn't pester you in the first place... -cries-

[Nationstatelandsville]

Relax, person who was absent for months, I'll get to it.

I was waiting for you to add her back in!
You never would have if I didn't pester you in the first place... -cries-

(pesters Night to post in news thread)

[Nationstatelandsville]

In the past fifteen pages or so, I've created three species of evil plants, all of whom have tried to kill Astro and Cond.