[DRAFT] Zombie Rights Accord

[Cardoness]

The World Assembly

REALIZING that Zombies are the reanimated corpses of various species;

ACKNOWLEDGES that Zombies look ugly, smell bad, and act in a most peculiar manner;

ALSO ACKNOWLEDGES that Zombies do not kill others, but rather, turns them into Zombies, thereby allowing such individuals to transcend and exist in an altered state of being;

BELIEVING this to be their only means of reproduction;

UNDERSTANDING that the only way to prevent this from happening is the mass extension of the transspecies Zombies;

FINDING this to be genocide and unacceptable;

HEREBY extends full and equal rights to the Zombies of a species as are available to the non Zombies of that same species.

[Grasmere]

The World Assembly

REALIZING that Zombies are the reanimated corpses of various species;

ACKNOWLEDGES that Zombies look ugly, smell bad, and act in a most peculiar manner;

ALSO ACKNOWLEDGES that Zombies do not kill others, but rather, turns them into Zombies, thereby allowing such individuals to transcend and exist in an altered state of being;

BELIEVING this to be their only means of reproduction;

UNDERSTANDING that the only way to prevent this from happening is the mass extension of the transspecies Zombies;

FINDING this to be genocide and unacceptable;

HEREBY extends full and equal rights to the Zombies of a species as are available to the non Zombies of that same species.

Nice resolution, but I wouldn't vote for it. We shoot zombies on sight. Period. At first, we attempted to try them in court for cannibalism, but that just ended up with them commiting 50 of the same crimes.

[Belschaft]

[Charlotte Ryberg]

Honoured ambassador from Cardoness, I fear that any attempt to grant human rights to all zombies could possibly result in the genocide of sapient BRRAINNS!

(On a serious note it is unlikely to pass for being silly anyway)

-Ms. S. Harper.

[Cardoness]

Honoured ambassador from Cardoness, I fear that any attempt to grant human rights to all zombies could possibly result in the genocide of sapient BRRAINNS!

(On a serious note it is unlikely to pass for being silly anyway)

-Ms. S. Harper.

(On a serious note, it was meant as a joke. Though if it gets a lot of support, who knows )

A corpse is the definitive example of a "transhuman", yet we don't see people standing up arguing for zombie rights here, now do we?

Zombie rights...hmmm...now there's an idea!

The Confederate Republic would support such an Act, upon the condition that its damn funny.

[Phonencia]

liesssssss!!! I have seen zombies kill and devour people with my own eyes! they are unintelliegent hunks of bio mass that should be exterminated!

[Bajireyn]

liesssssss!!! I have seen zombies kill and devour people with my own eyes! they are unintelliegent hunks of bio mass that should be exterminated!

they should be exterminated by fire napalm

[Bajireyn]

The World Assembly

REALIZING that Zombies are the reanimated corpses of various species;

ACKNOWLEDGES that Zombies look ugly, smell bad, and act in a most peculiar manner;

ALSO ACKNOWLEDGES that Zombies do not kill others, but rather, turns them into Zombies, thereby allowing such individuals to transcend and exist in an altered state of being;

BELIEVING this to be their only means of reproduction;

UNDERSTANDING that the only way to prevent this from happening is the mass extension of the transspecies Zombies;

FINDING this to be genocide and unacceptable;

HEREBY extends full and equal rights to the Zombies of a species as are available to the non Zombies of that same species.

are you serious ?

[Belschaft]

The World Assembly

REALIZING that Zombies are the reanimated corpses of various species;

ACKNOWLEDGES that Zombies look ugly, smell bad, and act in a most peculiar manner;

ALSO ACKNOWLEDGES that Zombies do not kill others, but rather, turns them into Zombies, thereby allowing such individuals to transcend and exist in an altered state of being;

BELIEVING this to be their only means of reproduction;

UNDERSTANDING that the only way to prevent this from happening is the mass extension of the transspecies Zombies;

FINDING this to be genocide and unacceptable;

HEREBY extends full and equal rights to the Zombies of a species as are available to the non Zombies of that same species.

are you serious ?

No, he wasn't. That was kinda the point.

[Libtaria]

The Federation of Libtaria would like to seek clarification on the issue of self defense. If this draft were to be passed, would people being attacked by the zombies be justified in re-killing them in self defense?

(note: the federation of libtaria acknowledges that this is a joke. )

[Great Nepal]

We support this for one reason and one only - since most people are hindus, most bodies are cremated. And it is obvious that once a body is reduced to basic basic chemical compounds cant come back to life.

[The Irish Marchlands]

"Ambassador, there is a draft bill being considered"
"Oh is there? Whats the bill about?" the ambassador replied, puffing on his cigar while reading an article about zombie killing monthly
"A Bill considering the granting of human rights to Zombies"
".....Get the fuck out."

[Cardoness]

The Federation of Libtaria would like to seek clarification on the issue of self defense. If this draft were to be passed, would people being attacked by the zombies be justified in re-killing them in self defense?

(note: the federation of libtaria acknowledges that this is a joke. )

Well, you kill (or re-kill as the case may be) a Zombie, they are dead (again), however the non-undead person would not stay dead but turn into a Zombie themselfs, I would say no...no re-killing of the Zombies, except as otherwise allowed by other law.

[Sprawlville]

liesssssss!!! I have seen zombies kill and devour people with my own eyes! they are unintelliegent hunks of bio mass that should be exterminated!

Our scientists have successfully adapted cranial implant technology and inserted it into the walking dead. It was able to turn an 'unintelligent husk' into a well-reasoned, if rotting, individual.

Unfortunately, it rapidly learned of what it was and shot itself in the head before we could convince it of its scientific merit. Ah well.

[Yohannes]

The honorary foreign minister Marty Natalagewa would like to know whether zombie is actually real, or simply a story to force kids to go to bed.

Sincerely
-Marty Natalagewa-
Foreign Minister

[Grasmere]

The honorary foreign minister Marty Natalagewa would like to know whether zombie is actually real, or simply a story to force kids to go to bed.

Sincerely
-Marty Natalagewa-
Foreign Minister

We can assure you that zombies have been demonstrated to be quite real, and many recorded happenings have taken place.

Also, why would you tell a child, presumably afraid of nightmares, something scary in order for them to go to bed?

[Yohannes]

The honorary foreign minister Marty Natalagewa would like to know whether zombie is actually real, or simply a story to force kids to go to bed.

Sincerely
-Marty Natalagewa-
Foreign Minister

We can assure you that zombies have been demonstrated to be quite real, and many recorded happenings have taken place.

Also, why would you tell a child, presumably afraid of nightmares, something scary in order for them to go to bed?

In the Indonesian Empire, it is known traditionally to tell unruly and mischievous kids that the ghosts, zombies, loch-ness monsters, etc. will stalk them at their bed if they keep their eyes open during supposedly declared bed-time.
This is a militaristic tradition entrenched upon our youngster to develop the right disclipine and father-mother-knows-best attitude upon them. Therefore we can sustain our exceptional growth, ensuring the next generation wouldn't be like most advanced and developed country's youths, spoiled and lacking in survive-or-die disclipine, leading to a national attitude degeneration, as happens in the country of the United States of America today.

Sincerely
-Helen Clark-
Minister of Education

[New Braunschweig]

"Ambassador, there is a draft bill being considered"
"Oh is there? Whats the bill about?" the ambassador replied, puffing on his cigar while reading an article about zombie killing monthly
"A Bill considering the granting of human rights to Zombies"
".....Get the fuck out."

It is the official stance that:
As progressive a nation as we are, New Braunschweig will not support legistlation that grants rights to the walking dead.

[Libtaria]

The honorary foreign minister Marty Natalagewa would like to know whether zombie is actually real, or simply a story to force kids to go to bed.

Sincerely
-Marty Natalagewa-
Foreign Minister

The Federation of Libtaria shares the concerns of the honorary foreign minister Marty Natalagewa.

[The Western Reaches]

Cool resolution bro.

[Libtaria]

Cool resolution bro.

The Federation of Libtaria secodns this motion.

[Kreanoltha]

We can not support this. We kill all zombies with cheap, automatic plasma weapons.

[Banjamos]

Zombies should be killed the old Russian way.

Napalm, then more fire, then some cluster bombs, then some Rockets, then some artillary, then some more rockets, then some more bombing, then some tanks to drive them over, then some IFVs to run them over, then some more tanks to run them over, a Russian light vehicle squad to run them over, then another pass by the Light vehicles, then another pass by the tanks, and then a final battlefield sanitation by some infantry.

The Russians sure knew how to kill Zombies in the cheapest ways!

[Libtaria]

We can not support this. We kill all zombies with cheap, automatic plasma weapons.

Libtaria stands that anyone who's played Halo knows how sucky plasma is against zombies.

Napalm, then more fire, then some cluster bombs, then some Rockets, then some artillary, then some more rockets, then some more bombing, then some tanks to drive them over, then some IFVs to run them over, then some more tanks to run them over, a Russian light vehicle squad to run them over, then another pass by the Light vehicles, then another pass by the tanks, and then a final battlefield sanitation by some infantry.

Sounds like a plan.

[Kreanoltha]

We can not support this. We kill all zombies with cheap, automatic plasma weapons.

Libtaria stands that anyone who's played Halo knows how sucky plasma is against zombies.

We maintain that with a sufficient knowledge of science one would know just how poorly depicted plasma weapons are in those games. We are amazed that they are still so epic.