The World Assembly Strangers' Bar

[Sathera]

Hans took the small cup of liquor and eyed it cautiously, it looked like some sort of ceremonial wine, but it smelled of something bitter, of iron. It would be incredibly rude, but Hans had to ask. "Forgive my impoliteness Zeukov, I would love to discuss an alliance between our two nations, but before we do that, may I ask what exactly is in this drink?"

[Soviet Canuckistan]

"Who needs more fries!" Sergei yelled "and hello newbie, I've heard you name is Hans, I'm Sergei and this is Simone."

[Hittanryan]

The AK turned into, yes you guessed it, a squirt gun. Candle Jack then got Sergei wet with it and defenestrated him.

Neville? Do something...

Simone walked up and kneed Candle Jack in the crotch and slapped him and said "The heck was that for you swine, you don't touch him." Sergei then walked just outside the door and threw a suitcase nuke in.

After double-facepalming, Friedman chucks a slushy snowball at Sergei. "Why the hell do you keep trying the 'suitcase nuke' thing? And where do you keep getting these things in the first place?"

... and popping of the lid a second time, releasing the aroma of blood and vodka. poured a bit into each glass.

"You know, the Bar has every nation's favourite liquor, you could've just asked," pouted Neville, observing the dragon's ceremony. "Besides, we don't let drinkers bring in their own tipple, it cuts into our profits."

"All right then, Neville, how about some of my nation's favorite liquor?" Friedman asked impishly, attempting to test the Bar Lord. He grabs a few fries and swipes a bottle of ketchup off of Violet's serving tray as she walks past.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

"Neville, name Soviet Canuckistan's favorite vodka and why Soviet Quebexico disagrees with this." Sergei asked the bartender.

[Ardchoille]

"All right then, Neville, how about some of my nation's favorite liquor?" Friedman asked impishly, attempting to test the Bar Lord.

"Tell me what it is, and I'll go fetch it," Neville said. "I don't store the stuff by nation, I store it by type and then alphabetically by name. We'll have it out there somewhere, though, unless your delegation has been really hitting the sauce and we're waiting for a shipment."

"He wanted you to guess, though, Neville," said Violet.

"Ï'm a BarLord, not a tealeaf reader," snorted her boss. He tapped his keyboard. "But, let's see ... given Hittanryan's highly educated populace, I'd normally guess that it'd be a gutsy red. But your fizzy drink sales are above average, and I'd hate to think you're adulterating decent wine with that stuff. Hmmm ... dedicated readers like your people often go for a good scotch, but, on the other hand, you've got a lot of auto workers, and they're fond of their beer -- good gods, who'd call a beer that?" he added, as he browsed his stock. "Hmmm ... well, look, I'll tell you what your favourite tipple should be. There's a lovely sauvignon blanc from just outside Paradise City, they call it Naked Owl. A bit acidic for my taste, but the bouquet is something to sing about. I'll go get some now -- plus whatever you want to actually order, of course, but I really think you should try this one."

He turned abruptly to Sergei. "As for your vodka, I don't know and I don't care," he said. "All you'll get here is the rotgut I told you you'd get here, and that's it. Besides, what does it matter, anyway? You'll just throw it up."

As the BarLord stalked away in a petulant snit, Violet offered a peacemaking solutionL "I could get you some chilled spring water," she told Sergei. "Float a mint leaf in it and you'll never know the difference. Well, you will, but it's healthier."

[The National Front Disco]

Bill Kelly cast a veteran's eye on the scene. His well-trained Combat Morris Team had cut a swathe through the conga line -- there wasn't an opposition ankle left untouched -- but it seemed some cooler heads were rallying for a counterstrike.

"Y'know, some of those boots those Nazis have are worth $1000 a pair," muttered Avaya enviously, as the steps of the measure took her past him. "See how careful they're being? I bet they'd faint if any potato chip grease got on 'em."

Bill glared sternly at his second in command. "We fight dirty, but we fight fair dirty," he reproved. "You don't damage the other side's kit. Besides, we haven't even begun scraping the bottom of the barrel yet. Arnie," he ordered the skinny piano accordionist, "you know what to do!"

A grim nod was the response, and within seconds the saccharine sound of Mull of Kintyre arranged cloyingly for piano accordion oozed inescapably into the Bar's atmosphere. But, though the sentimental sweetness was already playing havoc with the marchers, worse was to come.

The doors of the dining room parted, silhouetting against the golden light a figure surely half man, half god. From the irresistibly jaunty feather bonnet atop, through the boastfully poised sporran mid-range to the viciously sharp skean dhu tucked in the garter of his hose, John McGonnagle, Ardchoille's Secretary for Situations Like This, was awe made flesh.

And then the strutting figure coldly raised the chaunter to his unforgiving lips, and the pipes etched their way into the brains of the oncoming troupe.

The dance troupe has almost reached the front line of Morris Dancers when the pipes commence. Instantly their choreography is demolished and the entire group swept away in utter confusion by the infernal wailing. Ben the Bear staggers over to Bill Kelly, sobbing.

Ben: "I surrender! Please, please, just make it stop!"

Ben then buries his face in Bill Kelly's shoulder and bawls uncontrollably. The rest of the former dance troupe goes off in all directions, some clutching their ears, some vainly trying to either dance or goose step but without much success. It is a total rout.

Meanwhile, David and Bruce have beaten a hasty retreat down the hallway leading to the Bar's dining room. About halfway down the hall they duck inside a doorway that neither of them had noticed before. They slam the door behind them, which thankfully drowns out the pipes to some extent. It is a large empty room which had probably once been used for storage but was now abandoned. There is another doorway on the opposite wall.

Bruce: "Oh David, do you know what? This would be a perfect space for a salon."

David: "You know, it would! I wonder if the Bar would lease it out to us?."

Bruce: "Well we could inquire about it, make an offer."

David: "I've got it! Let's decorate it first. Get the shop set up so they can see the potential. It's not like they're using it for anything. If they say no we'll just have all the furnishings removed. No harm, no foul."

Bruce: "I wonder where that other door leads?"

David: "Well let's see. *opens door* "It leads into a service corridor of some sort. There's an elevator across the way. Probably something Building Management uses. The elevator says Warning Authorized Personnel Only and something about DLE."

Bruce: "Oooh lets get some things delivered and start decorating! I can't wait!"

David: "OK, OK, let me call Niles."

David phones Niles, an acquaintance who deals in hairdressing supplies, salon fixtures, furniture, and trendy decorations for proprietors of Nazi hairdressing salons.

David: *talking on a cellphone* "Niles? Hi this is David."

"Fine, thank you."

"Fabulous!"

"Listen Niles, Bruce and I are setting up a salon."

"No, not in Soho. It's going to be at the WA headquarters."

"No you heard right. The WA Headquarters."

"No I'm not drunk."

"Yes. I think we can accommodate 4 chairs and we'll also want to offer nail and cosmetics services. Send a couple of decorators too. Good ones. I'm thinking we'll do the place in a black, red and chrome motif."

"Yes the directions are....."

David proceeds to give directions to Niles. Once finished, he and Bruce go back out into the bar to wait for the furnishings and supplies to be delivered.

The crazed piping has died down. Arnie is now playing a soft Celtic tune on the piano accordion, but it is quiet and tolerable. The Morris Dancers are still dancing, but seem to have turned their attention to an unfortunate group of Kennyites. David eyes John McGonnagle warily, but the piper shows no signs of resuming his aural assault.

The two walk to the bar.

David: "Neville! Two cosmopolitans please. Make mine a double."

[Unibot II]

Eduard ran into the Strangers' Bar with Tasha following behind him.

The eccentric billionaire just mumbled, "I'll be a moment, buy yourself a drink,"

Eduard walked over to his private bar refrigerator carrying Tasha's satchel, he opened the door of the refrigerator and scuffled through the contents of the appliance. He finally pulled out a jar of what appeared to be urine and a garbage bag that had been taped to the interior of the refrigerator.

Eduard walked over to Tasha, sitting down at a bar-stool. He shoved the jar into the satchel and gently placed it on the table. Heir then explored the garbage bag, finding two passports. He glanced over at Tasha.

"I hope you don't mind," said Eduard, "but when I had planned this I assumed the person accompanying me would be another woman, someone I loved quite a lot; a spy. Obvious there were some romantic motivations underlying some of my choices when designing this plan... years ago."

Heir handed Tasha her passport, "It's Wevanosean; they're stuck with nineteenth century technology that hasn't popularized daguerreotypes yet. So... no photos required,"

From the garbage bag, Eduard also pulled out a folded knee-length dress, a Cloche hat and a fur scarf. "You may want to put this on.. erm.. honey. As you can see from the passport, Miss Aileen Joyce wouldn't be caught dead in such fashion as you're wearing tonight."

[Dragosovlkiav]

Hans took the small cup of liquor and eyed it cautiously, it looked like some sort of ceremonial wine, but it smelled of something bitter, of iron. It would be incredibly rude, but Hans had to ask. "Forgive my impoliteness Zeukov, I would love to discuss an alliance between our two nations, but before we do that, may I ask what exactly is in this drink?"

"it is a single drop of dragons blood mixed with the strongest draosovlkiavian vodka, that is why the glass and proportion is so small. now may we drink to celebrate a creation of an alliance?" he said raising his glass.

[Sathera]

Hans smiled, raising his glass. "Sathera and I both welcome this alliance of our nations with open arms."

[Soviet Canuckistan]

Sergei said to Simone "I don't feel so good" and then he puked all over the floor and ran to the bathroom followed by the sound of explosive diarrhea.

[Hittanryan]

"All right then, Neville, how about some of my nation's favorite liquor?" Friedman asked impishly, attempting to test the Bar Lord.

"Tell me what it is, and I'll go fetch it," Neville said. "I don't store the stuff by nation, I store it by type and then alphabetically by name. We'll have it out there somewhere, though, unless your delegation has been really hitting the sauce and we're waiting for a shipment."

"He wanted you to guess, though, Neville," said Violet.

"Ï'm a BarLord, not a tealeaf reader," snorted her boss. He tapped his keyboard. "But, let's see ... given Hittanryan's highly educated populace, I'd normally guess that it'd be a gutsy red. But your fizzy drink sales are above average, and I'd hate to think you're adulterating decent wine with that stuff. Hmmm ... dedicated readers like your people often go for a good scotch, but, on the other hand, you've got a lot of auto workers, and they're fond of their beer -- good gods, who'd call a beer that?" he added, as he browsed his stock. "Hmmm ... well, look, I'll tell you what your favourite tipple should be. There's a lovely sauvignon blanc from just outside Paradise City, they call it Naked Owl. A bit acidic for my taste, but the bouquet is something to sing about. I'll go get some now -- plus whatever you want to actually order, of course, but I really think you should try this one."

He turned abruptly to Sergei. "As for your vodka, I don't know and I don't care," he said. "All you'll get here is the rotgut I told you you'd get here, and that's it. Besides, what does it matter, anyway? You'll just throw it up."

As the BarLord stalked away in a petulant snit, Violet offered a peacemaking solutionL "I could get you some chilled spring water," she told Sergei. "Float a mint leaf in it and you'll never know the difference. Well, you will, but it's healthier."

"Didn't think anyone outside the Republic had even heard of anything from the vineyards in the Tharsis Plains. I mean, I know I ordered a Gargle Blaster earlier, but I asked for it by name. All right Neville, I'm sufficiently impressed," Friedman conceded. "You're not ordering that," Erin admonished, "Naked Owl doesn't come cheap." Friedman rolled his eyes, "Yes, mom. Relax, I was about to try to order a coffee. Don't suppose you have any back there, Neville?"

[Black Marne]

Weebam-Na walked into the bar, and looked around. "By Sithis! Much seems to have changed since my last visit. Who are you ambassadors?"

[Smullania]

Weebam-Na walked into the bar, and looked around. "By Sithis! Much seems to have changed since my last visit. Who are you ambassadors?"

I still hang out here, but my assistants have arrived, and I am just dreaming about ways to hurt Sergei. Potato chips without chili and cheese? You monster.

[Dragosovlkiav]

Hans smiled, raising his glass. "Sathera and I both welcome this alliance of our nations with open arms."

zeukov tilted back his glass and drank then hit a switch, his two men came in an collected the bottle and walked out.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

Weebam-Na walked into the bar, and looked around. "By Sithis! Much seems to have changed since my last visit. Who are you ambassadors?"

I still hang out here, but my assistants have arrived, and I am just dreaming about ways to hurt Sergei. Potato chips without chili and cheese? You monster.

Sergei pecked up and said "I heard that and Neville set the Weapon Transmorgrifier to ketchup for the fries, please and I'll fetch another suitcase nuke."

[The Andromeda Islands]

Outgoing Andromedan Lennox Thomas’ party arrives at the World Assembly Stranger’s Bar. Thomas arrives with Incoming Ambassador Duncan Pinderhughes and his wife, Mercedes. All of them are dressed casually.

An attendant leads Thomas to his regular table.


Lennox Thomas is the outgoing Andromedan Ambassador to the World Assembly. He will remain as Assistant Ambassador.

Thomas turns to Pinderhughes as they walk over to his table.

THOMAS: I’m surprised the President didn’t come with us. I guess Bianca’s made a new man out of Swinging Chad.

PINDERHUGHES: Swinging Chad’s now a husband, a father, and a Head of State. Things like that’ll change a man.

THOMAS: Anyway, if you want to be a good World Assembly Ambassador, you’ll get to know this place.

Thomas and his party sit at his table. The attendant leans over to Thomas.

ATTENDANT: Will your two female friends arrive later?

THOMAS: Yes, they will. Just lead them here.


Duncan Pinderhughes is the incoming Andromedan Ambassador to the World Assembly. He and his wife, Mercedes, just arrived in the World Assembly Territory.

Thomas nods over to a man in a top hat surrounded by a number of midgets. The man nods back.


Several employees of the World Assembly Postal Service.

THOMAS: The guy in the top hat, that’s the Director of the Postal Service. You should buy him a drink.

MERCEDES: You said something about two female friends.

THOMAS: One of them is Kim Kyung Jin. I think you know her.

MERCEDES: We played together on the soccer team that won the Baptism of Fire.


Kim Kyung Jin, an inspector with the Secretariat, played on the Andromeda National Soccer Team with Mercedes Sloane and Bianca Knox in 2010.

THOMAS: Now, she’s a regional compliance officer with the Secretariat. She’s coming here with Tammy.

PINDERHUGHES: Who’s Tammy?

THOMAS: Tamara Chapman. She’s Chief of Staff at the Embassy. She’s also one of the best dancers I’ve ever seen.

A beautiful, athletic woman walks over to Thomas’ table.

TAMMY: Don’t forget the most important thing.

THOMAS: She’s also my wife.


Tamara Chapman, the Andromedan Embassy’s Chief of Staff, is Lennox Thomas’ third wife.

TAMMY: I’m sorry about being so curt at the Embassy. I was making the final arrangements for the President’s speech when we met.

PINDERHUGHES: We’ll definitely need your help in the next few weeks.

MERCEDES: I love your dress.

While the girls talked, Pinderhughes pointed to the bar.

PINDERHUGHES: Is that what I think it is?


Friendship is…?

THOMAS: I’m sorry. I don’t know what you mean.

PINDERHUGHES: The purple horse with the bottle. You don’t see it?

Thomas looks.

THOMAS: Oh that. You get used to it.

Kim Kyung Jin arrives at the table.

KIM: Lenny. Tammy. I’ve got to tell…

Kim notices Pinderhughes.

KIM: Duncan. What are you doing here?

Pinderhughes and Kim dated before he met Mercedes. He plays it cool.

PINDERHUGHES: You remember Mercedes.

Kim’s excitement dampens.

KIM: Mrs. Pinderhughes. It’s been such a long time

MERCEDES: Yes, Kim. It has. Waiter? What’s good here?

KIM: Is Bianca here?

MERCEDES: Yes. The First Lady is at the Hotel with the President.

The waiter comes over.

MERCEDES: Waiter, bring something strong.’

[Dragosovlkiav]

Hans smiled, raising his glass. "Sathera and I both welcome this alliance of our nations with open arms."

zeukov tilted back his glass and drank then hit a switch, his two men came in an collected the bottle and walked out.

after having his drink he got up and walked over to the juke box and put this on.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

Simone asked "Zeukov, are you and your nation, by chance, ponyists?"

[Dragosovlkiav]

Simone asked "Zeukov, are you and your nation, by chance, ponyists?"

"why is it you ask comrade?" he replied returning to his chair.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

"My nation...you see is anti-ponyist...and it's a very pertinent question to our allies." Simone replied.

OOC: Because you post in the MLP thread.

[Dragosovlkiav]

"My nation...you see is anti-ponyist...and it's a very pertinent question to our allies." Simone replied.

OOC: Because you post in the MLP thread.

"we are not against them, why should we? but we are not with them."
he said taking some offense.

OOC: they make great people to converse with, i can't help enjoying great company.

[Retired WerePenguins]

"Ponies," Z shouted from the bar. "Who cares about ponies? They aren't cute. Penguins are Cute! Penguins are Adorable! Penguins are Supreme!"



"Did I mention that I can turn into a penguin? No really. How cute is that?"

[Dragosovlkiav]

"Ponies," Z shouted from the bar. "Who cares about ponies? They aren't cute. Penguins are Cute! Penguins are Adorable! Penguins are Supreme!"

(Image)(Image)(Image)(Image)

"Did I mention that I can turn into a penguin? No really. How cute is that?"

"that is amazing comrade." he said drawing the last of his cigar.

[The Republic of Lanos]

Candle Jack happens to notice Sergei ask about ponies and if said ambassador's home nation supported them. Since he frequently heard of such incidents not going well, he decided to construct a makeshift steel and concrete fort in the Lanosian section of the bar to protect against said incidents. After all he had ponies work for him. (OOC: Well I can't defenestrate Sergei now, can I?)

Or something better...damn. Ok start building the fort boys. We don't know what will happen. Ms. Violet? More drinks and food please.

[Dragosovlkiav]

Candle Jack happens to notice Sergei ask about ponies and if said ambassador's home nation supported them. Since he frequently heard of such incidents not going well, he decided to construct a makeshift steel and concrete fort in the Lanosian section of the bar to protect against said incidents. After all he had ponies work for him. (OOC: Well I can't defenestrate Sergei now, can I?)

Or something better...damn. Ok start building the fort boys. We don't know what will happen. Ms. Violet? More drinks and food please.

seeing the small fort under construction zeukov just sighed, he was not in the mood to fight.