[SUBMITTED] Conservation to Save Natural Life

[Manaime]

Iksana snorts. "So you're not even going to acknowledge the humanocentrism? Is that it?"

Teran Saber "I second this statement. No support until this is addressed."

Already changed it, mister. That comment was before I edited it more better.

[Manaime]

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[Essu Beti]

((OOC: It's been sent too early. Proposals take time to perfect. Your English is still blocky, and I have no idea why your initial paragraph mentions micro-organisms from polutants when the real problem is the polutants themselves. And you're still using 'conservative' instead of 'conservation,' and there's still some humanocentrism that needs purged. Also it really doesn't do much at all except establish a committee.

Seriously, give it a lot more than just a few hours without comments before you submit it next time. It's a marathon, not a sprint.))

[Manaime]

((OOC: It's been sent too early. Proposals take time to perfect. Your English is still blocky, and I have no idea why your initial paragraph mentions micro-organisms from polutants when the real problem is the polutants themselves. And you're still using 'conservative' instead of 'conservation,' and there's still some humanocentrism that needs purged. Also it really doesn't do much at all except establish a committee.

Seriously, give it a lot more than just a few hours without comments before you submit it next time. It's a marathon, not a sprint.))

Sure! I'll just wait for a few hours before I can send my proposal, done!

[The Sheika]

((OOC: It's been sent too early. Proposals take time to perfect. Your English is still blocky, and I have no idea why your initial paragraph mentions micro-organisms from polutants when the real problem is the polutants themselves. And you're still using 'conservative' instead of 'conservation,' and there's still some humanocentrism that needs purged. Also it really doesn't do much at all except establish a committee.

Seriously, give it a lot more than just a few hours without comments before you submit it next time. It's a marathon, not a sprint.))

Sure! I'll just wait for a few hours before I can send my proposal, done!

OOC: Good proposals can take days, weeks, possibly months to perfect. It's not a race. Take the time to improve your proposal using the critical information provided here and you should be alright.

[Nessuna-Arma]

Knowing that the environment is at risk of being affected with micro-organisms that may have spread from pollutants, often to endanger living organisms such as trees and mammals, by tending to break out into smaller forms of particles, at which, may seem to cause global warming,

Chemistry is not my forte but I am reasonably sure that micro-organisms are not the apparent cause of global warming. Carbon dioxide and other chemical emissions are.

[Araraukar]

OOC: Why the hell did you submit this? It's still full of nonsense.

[Imperium Anglorum]

OOC: Why the hell did you submit this? It's still full of nonsense.

I don't see any submission of the sort on the feed or in the proposals list. (EDIT) I see, it was from hours ago.

[Wrapper]

7 hours ago: Manaime withdrew a proposal from the WA General Assembly titled "Conservation to Save natural life".
7 hours ago: Manaime submitted a proposal to the General Assembly Environmental Board entitled "Conservation to Save natural life".

Consensus appears to be that the withdrawal was a wise decision. Slow it down a bit, Manaime. This is a detailed proposal that's going to need some work before it's ready to submit.

EDIT to add: It's extremely bad strategy to submit a proposal right before an update (midnight EDT, noon EDT). You'll gain an additional nearly 12 hours of time to attain quorum if you submit it right after an update.

[Manaime]

Since no-one's saying anything to enhance the proposal, I'll go ahead and publish it,

[Essu Beti]

OOC: Marathon, not a sprint. Not everyone logs in every day.

EDIT: Seriously, proposals take months to finish. There's no need to rush.

[Manaime]

It has been quite a while. I believe the marathon is too "long" to even exist, and well, I'm not going to be that paitent anymore.

[Essu Beti]

OOC: A couple of days is hardly quite a while. If you look at some of the passed resolutions, you'll see. The most recent passed resolution, Trade of Endangered Organisms? Its thread started in October of 2016. Proposals can't just be cranked out in a few days, if you want them to be good enough to be passed.

[The Sheika]

So, what exactly would you want to do with this proposal? Are you trying to reduce pollution or littering, or what? You have a better chance of passing something if it's a specific solution to a specific problem. Making a vague "let's make the environment better" statement, even wrapped up in pretty language, is unlikely to pass or really to even make much sense.

This right here is something to consider. I've looked over what you've written for your proposal, and there is a lot going on there. Are we talking about reducing pollution, cutting down on litter, and educating people on how to do both? Hey, that's cool...but it's almost like you're taking each point and framing it with words to make it seem like it is something bigger than it really is.

Knowing that the environment is at risk of being affected with chemical emissions that may have spread from pollutants, often to endanger living organisms such as trees and mammals, by tending to break out into smaller forms of particles, at which, may seem to cause global warming,

Kind of like that. There is a lot going on in that...I guess we could call it a sentence, although it reads like three or more.

Planning a better future for mankind, both in matters of government changes to release a conservative campaign against the reduce of factories and other types of pollutants that tend to be wasted,

I think it might have been mentioned, but keeping it humanocentric could be a problem, given that the WA is made up of more than just human beings. Some clarity on the language might help as well.

Overall, it looks like there is a lot of editing that needs done to make your proposal more direct in what you intend to do. No, it's not easy, and yes it is something that can take a considerable amount of time, but if this is something that you care about then it will be worth it. As I said earlier, writing a good proposal can take at least a couple of days, perhaps even weeks or months. It's not a race, and if it is a race, you will fair better as a tortoise as opposed a hare.

[Manaime]

OOC: A couple of days is hardly quite a while. If you look at some of the passed resolutions, you'll see. The most recent passed resolution, Trade of Endangered Organisms? Its thread started in October of 2016. Proposals can't just be cranked out in a few days, if you want them to be good enough to be passed.

Shall I include you and Arakauar as co-author since you helped me in this proposal?

[Essu Beti]

I'd rahter not. I'm a commenter, not a co-author.

[Manaime]

I'd rahter not. I'm a commenter, not a co-author.

Ok then.

[Araraukar]

Shall I include you and Arakauar as co-author since you helped me in this proposal?

OOC: Unless you're going to be smart about it (actually taking your time to edit, answering questions and being willing to work on it), no thanks.

So, again, what do you actually want to do with it? It's all over the place now, the language is still atrocious and if you seriously submitted it, I'd file a challenge on the basis on it being gibberish.

[Wallenburg]

Could you explain to me the goals of this proposal, as to both mandates on member states and further recommendations to them? I get that you want to reduce pollution, but the way that this proposal seems to be going about it has a very orange-blue mentality to it.

[Manaime]

Could you explain to me the goals of this proposal, as to both mandates on member states and further recommendations to them? I get that you want to reduce pollution, but the way that this proposal seems to be going about it has a very orange-blue mentality to it.

All I just wanna do is increase conservation throughout NS Nations. No one has ever made it to grant authority of conservation, and I just want to do just that.

[Essu Beti]

Again, it's conservation, not conservative. They have very, very different meanings. A conservative proposal definitely wouldn't be putting regulations on factory output.

[Wallenburg]

Could you explain to me the goals of this proposal, as to both mandates on member states and further recommendations to them? I get that you want to reduce pollution, but the way that this proposal seems to be going about it has a very orange-blue mentality to it.

All I just wanna do is increase conservative ideas throughout NS Nations. No one has ever made it to grant authority of conservative ideas, and I just want to do just that.

1) This is conservative. This is conservative. This is not. That is conservationism. Big difference.
2) "I just want more conservationism" isn't helpful. Legislation requires a specific goal or goals in mind, and means by which to achieve that goal. If I don't even know what exactly you want to do, I can't help you to make this proposal work.

[Bitely]

All I just wanna do is increase conservative ideas throughout NS Nations. No one has ever made it to grant authority of conservative ideas, and I just want to do just that.

1) This is conservative. This is conservative. This is not. That is conservationism. Big difference.
2) "I just want more conservationism" isn't helpful. Legislation requires a specific goal or goals in mind, and means by which to achieve that goal. If I don't even know what exactly you want to do, I can't help you to make this proposal work.

Surprisingly I agree with Wallenburg. Saying: "I just want more conservationism" isn't very helpful. Promoting conservationism and conservationism Legislation is needed.
As per CONSERVATISM, the WA could use more diversity of thought and ideas.

[Bears Armed]

1) This is conservative. This is conservative. This is not. That is conservationism. Big difference.

OOC; Please try to remember that many NS players are not from the USA, and that definitions of the term 'conservative' can vary from culture to culture.

[Araraukar]

OOC: For general "increasing conservationism" and reducing pollution things, we already have these resolutions in the books:

GA #66, Endangered Species Protection
GA #290, Protecting Migratory Animals
GA #291, Sustainable Forest Management
GA #296, Prevention of Wildfires
GA #301, Ban on Leaded Fuel
GA #346, Researching Unique Ecosystems
GA #357, Promotion of Clean Energy
GA #371, Toxic Heavy Metals Act
GA #376, Pesticide Regulations
GA #382, Environmental Warfare Act
GA #403, Trade of Endangered Organisms

And probably many more, I just had a quick look at the passed resolutions.

To Manaime: Anything you draft now, needs to not contradict or largely duplicate any existing resolution, so when we say that you have a lot of work to do, that includes the homework of reading through the existing resolutions to make sure you avoid breaking the proposal rules.

Proposal rules: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=159348
Passed resolutions: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=30

To regulars: No, not all of the resolutions listed are in Environmental category, but I'm talking about actual effects of resolution text on nature protection and conservation, not stats effects. You could easily place an anti-littering proposal into Moral Decency, despite it being good for the nature.