[SUBMITTED] Phone Home Act

[Gnejs]

Gnejsian ambassador Wilma Wijk enters the chamber for the first time in months. With her is a plate of tacos and Nicho Thistle, former PUG-representative to the now defunct body Council of IDU States (CIDUS). The former diplomat has been drifting more or less aimlessly since the implosion and collapse of the CIDUS, and now he's somehow made his way to the WA-HQ and Wilma's side, seemingly making him the second member of the PUG-delegation.

- "Here, Thistle, sit down. This is the chamber I was telling you about. Tortilla?"

- "Yes, please. Hm, I see, the chamber. Nice, in a grey kind of way. Do you come here often then?"

- "Me? No, I tend to stay in my office. Never been much for arguing, and all that talk about war and sickness is so droll."

- "So what do you do then, in your office?"

- "Sudoko, mostly. Yoga, occasionally. But I did write this, take a look, that's why I brought you here today."

Wijk hands Thistle a copy of her draft, while simultaneously trying to get the lid of her box of guacamole. Thistle gives the paper a glance and responds.

- "So when you finally get out of the office, you decided to draft a proposal about surcharges for playing 'Angry Mallards' abroad?"

- "Well, yes, and other stuff, family emergencies and so on and so on."

- "Really, Wilma, shouldn't you be doing something worthwhile, like, I don't know, curing smallpox or forcing everyone to recycle or something?"

- "Thistle, we can't all be saving the world all the time; these small things matter as well."

- "Sure they do."

The PUG-ambassador licks her fingers and smacks loudly before continuing.

- "Come on, Thistle, will you help me argue this?"

- "Sure. I can't very well not do it, can I? And I mean, I get the frustration, after my trip to Maxtopia last spring I got a fucking huge bill, and I was only online for like a minute!"

- "I thought the CIDUS-delegation got their phone bills covered?"

- "Well, yeah, we do, eh, did. But it's the principle of the thing, social justice and all that... You know, it's your bloody proposal. How do you debate these things anyways, there's no one else here."

- "See that red button? If you push that all the other delegations gets a notice that this proposal is now up for discussion. Push it, Thistle."

Thistle walks towards the red button, pauses to take a look at the empty chamber, and then pushes the button, and says

- "What if no one shows up?"

- "Then we'll view that as evidence of our, well, my brilliance, and that nothing is in need of changing."

- "I'm pretty sure that's not how it works."

- "God, Thistle, who's the old woman here? I was joking. We'll wait, ok? Now, Ramitas?"

- "Don't mind if I do."

[States of Glory WA Office]

Neville: (runs into the Chamber while carrying a bucket of water) Where's the flame?! Has Ambassador Leveret misplaced her flamethrower again?!

Fairburn: (follows with a fire extinguisher) This is probably going to be more effective. Anyway, how did a fire start here, of all places?!

Neville: (looks at Ambassador Thistle) You over there. You rang the alarm. Where's the fire?

[Gnejs]

Thistle wakes up abruptly from a texmex-induced slumber, stands to his feet and begins rambling:

- "What, who, where, what? What are you talking about? Fire? Where's the fire..."

He looks at the PUG-ambassador, deeply entrenched in a horde of assorted Sudoko boards.

- "Wilma. Did you have me press the fire alarm?"

- "Yes, sure did.

- "But why?"

- "I've been here many years, and I know that the only surefire - pun intended, hoho - way of getting everybody out and about is the fire alarm."

- "But you want them to come here! Why would they come here? Who in their right mind would run towards the source of a fire alarm?!"

He stops and looks at Neville and Fairburn.

- "No offense, gentlemen. Running towards it with the intention of putting out the fire is obviously sound, but you get my point, no?"

He looks around, still bewildered. He picks up one of Wilma's bowls, and approaches the two men

- "So, sorry about that. Nachos? The guac is kind of putrid, but Wilma assures me its homemade.

He hands Neville the bowl.

- "Any chance of you fellows looking through Wilma's proposal while you're here? And again, I'm sorry about the alarm."

[Tinfect]

MANDATES that all network owners/operators in WA member states refrain from adding surcharges for non-domestic users from other member states connecting to their network for the first 120 minutes of calling and 1 megabytes of data;

OOC:
Feel the need to point out that 1 Megabyte is, approximately, jack-shit.

[Gnejs]

OOC: So noted. Any suggestions on how it could be jacked-up to a worthwhile-yet-reasonable level? Also, while these sort of comments are sorely appreciated - I don't really know much about this stuff - I kindly ask they be put forward IC. It makes it easier for my characters to respond, and it's more fun.

[Wallenburg]

"I still have no idea what this proposal is on about. Since when were telegraph lines measured in minutes, and what on earth is a m-'megabyte'?"

[Tinfect]

OOC: So noted. Any suggestions on how it could be jacked-up to a worthwhile-yet-reasonable level? Also, while these sort of comments are sorely appreciated - I don't really know much about this stuff - I kindly ask they be put forward IC. It makes it easier for my characters to respond, and it's more fun.

OOC:
I won't pretend to have flawless knowledge on the subject of data usage either, on the field of Megabytes, however, 100 should be closer to enough to keep Bank Accounts in order and such things. The average for such things here in the 'States is always going up, and the most recent numbers I can find still put it vastly above that number, so, it shouldn't mean that people can just hop over national borders to steal some Data, but shouldn't put too much hurt on them as long as they don't throw it around pointlessly. From an MT perspective it should be fine.

As for why this is OOC, it's because doing it IC, being FT and all that, would turn it from 100 Megabytes to 100 Terrabytes. At some point, Storage/Processing Capacity outstrips the need for silly things like Data Compression. And it probably doesn't help that streaming information over Interstellar Distances distances is straight up impossible for the Imperium, so, lacking a local clone of the Archive, or an Imperial Relay, it'd have to send as much information as possible, all at once.

[Gnejs]

"I still have no idea what this proposal is on about. Since when were telegraph lines measured in minutes, and what on earth is a m-'megabyte'?"

Thistle looks away from Neville and Fairburn and begins to address the representative from Wallenburg, but he is quickly brushed aside by Wilma.

- "Tend to the boys, Thistle."

She hisses to him as she approaches the representative.

- "Welcome! I can understand how this all seems rather confusing. Long story short, in my country we have electronic devices that lets you speak to other persons - and even send them images and browse giant invisible networks of information - with a similar device. Some of them are mobile as well and let's you walk around when you do it.

What's more, a lot of member states actually share this technology and have compatible infrastructure that allows you to continue doing all these things seamlessly while crossing borders.

Now, I see how this probably won't apply to a nation such as yours, and undoubtedly many others with a similar level of technological advancement, so this might not be very relevant for you. You'd have to comply, of course, should this one day pass, but I've phrased the operative clause so that it says that a nation's telecommunications companies must refrain from adding any surcharges to users when they connect to their network. Compliance for nations such as your own would thereby mean that if and when you attain this sort of technology, then you'd have to instruct your companies to not add any surcharges when users from other member states connect to their networks.

Much like that resolution about handling space debris; we don't have a space program and we'll likely never get one, we're afraid of space and would rather stay well away from it. If we, one day, however, started launching stuff into space, we'd make sure to do it in line with that resolution. So, we're in compliance with it. I hope so, at least, because that's what I reported back home when they asked me if we needed to start a space program.

Feel free to help yourself to tacos, they're good."

OOC:
I won't pretend to have flawless knowledge on the subject of data usage either, on the field of Megabytes, however, 100 should be closer to enough to keep Bank Accounts in order and such things. The average for such things here in the 'States is always going up, and the most recent numbers I can find still put it vastly above that number, so, it shouldn't mean that people can just hop over national borders to steal some Data, but shouldn't put too much hurt on them as long as they don't throw it around pointlessly. From an MT perspective it should be fine.

OOC: Thank you kindly, much appreciated. I'll probably have one of my characters "suddenly" realize this and amend the proposal accordingly. It'll be giving those two idiots more credit than they're worth, but still.

As for why this is OOC, it's because doing it IC, being FT and all that, would turn it from 100 Megabytes to 100 Terrabytes. At some point, Storage/Processing Capacity outstrips the need for silly things like Data Compression. And it probably doesn't help that streaming information over Interstellar Distances distances is straight up impossible for the Imperium, so, lacking a local clone of the Archive, or an Imperial Relay, it'd have to send as much information as possible, all at once.

OOC: That's fair, I didn't consider that aspect of it.

[The Greater Siriusian Domain]

Teran Saber: "In the Greater Siriusian Domain, we find your conventional cell phone technology to be obsolete. This proposal essentially does nothing within the Confederacy."

[Wallenburg]

"Welcome! I can understand how this all seems rather confusing. Long story short, in my country we have electronic devices that lets you speak to other persons - and even send them images and browse giant invisible networks of information - with a similar device. Some of them are mobile as well and let's you walk around when you do it.

"Fascinating."

What's more, a lot of member states actually share this technology and have compatible infrastructure that allows you to continue doing all these things seamlessly while crossing borders.

Now, I see how this probably won't apply to a nation such as yours, and undoubtedly many others with a similar level of technological advancement, so this might not be very relevant for you. You'd have to comply, of course, should this one day pass, but I've phrased the operative clause so that it says that a nation's telecommunications companies must refrain from adding any surcharges to users when they connect to their network. Compliance for nations such as your own would thereby mean that if and when you attain this sort of technology, then you'd have to instruct your companies to not add any surcharges when users from other member states connect to their networks.

"Yes, but you seem to misunderstand the definition of 'network'. Networks are not exclusively defined as these fantastical communications platforms. Telephone lines are networks. Telegraph lines are networks. Railroads are networks. Sewage systems are networks. The current phrasing of the proposal would apply these requirements to those networks, which makes no sense."

Much like that resolution about handling space debris; we don't have a space program and we'll likely never get one, we're afraid of space and would rather stay well away from it. If we, one day, however, started launching stuff into space, we'd make sure to do it in line with that resolution. So, we're in compliance with it. I hope so, at least, because that's what I reported back home when they asked me if we needed to start a space program.

"I do not object to legislation on technology beyond Wallenburg's development, but to legislation that seems to assume that such technology is developed in all member nations."

Feel free to help yourself to tacos, they're good."

"What flavor is it?"

Gerald looks at Mikael and raises an eyebrow. "It's a taco, it doesn't have a bloody flavor."

[Imperium Anglorum]

Feel free to help yourself to tacos, they're good."

Parsons: TAEH-KEHS or TAH-KOHS?

[States of Glory WA Office]

"Any chance of you fellows looking through Wilma's proposal while you're here? And again, I'm sorry about the alarm."

Fairburn: Forget it. Intentionally or not, I've been deceived and made into a fool. Besides, I cannot understand the text of this proposal at all. What's wrong with a good old Morse code machine? I'm out. (exits)

Neville: Unlike my colleague, I do happen to possess a mobile phone. However, even I'm a little confused as to what this actually does. Also, I hate nachos. They're the work of a demon, I tell you.

[Gnejs]

Parsons: TAEH-KEHS or TAH-KOHS?

Wilma turns around abruptly, and faces Parsons.

- «Huh, what? Oh, eh, which ever one you prefer Your Dukeness.»

She bends her entire body forwards in an awkward bow and begins to turn around towards Mikael and Gerald. On her way, Thistle whispers to her

- «I don’t think that’s how you adress a Duke, Wilma.»

- «Well how would I know!? There hasn’t been an aristocrat in PUG since Harald Fairhair lost his head.»

She faces Mikael and Gerald

"Yes, but you seem to misunderstand the definition of 'network'. Networks are not exclusively defined as these fantastical communications platforms. Telephone lines are networks. Telegraph lines are networks. Railroads are networks. Sewage systems are networks. The current phrasing of the proposal would apply these requirements to those networks, which makes no sense.»

- «That is a rather excellent point, I’ll make note of it and have Thistle try to work something out. Thank you.»

"I do not object to legislation on technology beyond Wallenburg's development, but to legislation that seems to assume that such technology is developed in all member nations."

- «I assure you, ambassador, it has never been my intention to make such an assumption. Granted, I have obviously not been completely aware of the… eh… diversity, yes, let’s call it diversity, of the members that actually grace these halls, but I did try to account for something like this by initially claiming that «many» member states share similar systems, and doesn’t saying that in and of itself recognize that others may not? Which parts in particular do you feel make these assumptions?»

Fairburn: Forget it. Intentionally or not, I've been deceived and made into a fool. Besides, I cannot understand the text of this proposal at all. What's wrong with a good old Morse code machine? I'm out. (exits)

Neville: Unlike my colleague, I do happen to possess a mobile phone. However, even I'm a little confused as to what this actually does. Also, I hate nachos. They're the work of a demon, I tell you.

Thistle sighs, and replies

- «Oh well, that’s life I suppose. Cheerio then, and thanks for coming to the rescue, kind of.»

Wilma takes a moment, turns away from the Wallenburgian representative, and whispers to Thistle

- «What did those dapper looking boys have to say? Did they try the nachos?»

- «Mostly stuff about wounded pride and Morse code. I did gather they didn’t quite seem to understand your proposal though, which, I must say, is starting to look like a majority view around here. And no, they declined tasting the nachos, but it seemed to be based on some sort of religious thing, so I wouldn’t think too much of it.»

- «But it’s all so clear! Am I the only who sees this?»

- «Quite possibly, yes. I think it’s mostly to do with people being uncomfortable about this dealing so clearly with so-called «modern-tech» and assumptions being made about nations this isn’t very relevant/applicable for.»

- «Modern tech? Modern tech?! How does this paradox of a house not implode on a daily basis? How am I supposed to cater to cave-dwellers and star lords simultaneously? Past and future? We’re right here, right now, aren’t we?»

- «Well, they’re also here, eh, there. They’re there, here; they’re here and there, now, and then, I suppose. Look, I don’t quite get it either, but just roll with it, be nice, and we’ll try and figure something out.»

Teran Saber: "In the Greater Siriusian Domain, we find your conventional cell phone technology to be obsolete. This proposal essentially does nothing within the Confederacy."

Wilma looks terrified.

- «Thistle, is that a star lord?»

Thistle looks through a glossy folder detailing various delegations.

- «Eh, yes, in the sense that he represents a state which consists of many planets and travel by space ship etc., sure. Remember, be nice, and roll with it.»

- «Yes, yes, picture me rollin.»

She faces Teran

- «Greetings, Star Lord. We will look at amending our proposal, although I’m not sure it’ll ever be able to cover civilizations such as yours. Please, accept this churro as a token of friendship.»

She looks at Thistle

- «How did I roll?»

- «Meh, could’ve been worse.

[Caral]

As a country which is now embracing corruption and stuff, we want to state our hate and anger toward this proposal. Why? Because we haven't still make it to the moon, and we are starting to limit telecommunications corporations with useless uniformity and reducing their profit.
We have to start to embrace Dilan's dream of a free global market and anti-Wales rhetoric. They are planning something, we have to stop them before if too late.

[States of Glory WA Office]

«Huh, what? Oh, eh, which ever one you prefer Your Dukeness.»

Fairburn: (re-enters) Actually, it's Lord Colonel His Grace Cyril Parsons, 1st Duke of Geneva, 1st Earl Parsons of Eastminster, 8th Viscount Parsons of Eastminster, 1st Baron Markenshire of Concilium, Knight of the Garter, Grand Cross of St Michael and St George, Privy Councillor, Member of Parliament for Those-Across-the-Seas; Proconsul Decimus; Permanent Representative to the World Assembly. Do you have no respect for official titles? (exits again)

«Modern tech? Modern tech?! How does this paradox of a house not implode on a daily basis? How am I supposed to cater to cave-dwellers and star lords simultaneously? Past and future? We’re right here, right now, aren’t we?»

Neville: I have no idea what you were whispering about before, but I can assure you that our respective nations are both at around the same tech level. There's no need to shout about it.

[The Greater Siriusian Domain]

Teran Saber: "In the Greater Siriusian Domain, we find your conventional cell phone technology to be obsolete. This proposal essentially does nothing within the Confederacy."

Wilma looks terrified.

- «Thistle, is that a star lord?»

Thistle looks through a glossy folder detailing various delegations.

- «Eh, yes, in the sense that he represents a state which consists of many planets and travel by space ship etc., sure. Remember, be nice, and roll with it.»

- «Yes, yes, picture me rollin.»

She faces Teran

- «Greetings, Star Lord. We will look at amending our proposal, although I’m not sure it’ll ever be able to cover civilizations such as yours. Please, accept this churro as a token of friendship.»

She looks at Thistle

- «How did I roll?»

- «Meh, could’ve been worse.

*Ambassador Teran Saber sighs*

"One suggestion would be to use somewhat more broad terms that are descriptive of function when referring to communications devices. For example, instead of 'cellular phone', try 'networked wireless communications device'. Oh, and thanks for the gift, but you can keep it. As a general rule we prefer continued positive relations as a token of friendship over material goods."

[Gnejs]

*Ambassador Teran Saber sighs*

"One suggestion would be to use somewhat more broad terms that are descriptive of function when referring to communications devices. For example, instead of 'cellular phone', try 'networked wireless communications device'. Oh, and thanks for the gift, but you can keep it. As a general rule we prefer continued positive relations as a token of friendship over material goods."

Thistle approaches Saber, and replies

- "Yes, ambassador, I believe it was something along those lines that Wilma had in mind when she mentioned amending the proposal, I just think she's uncertain as whether we'll be able to actually come up with something that satisfies the entire crowd. Personally I don't think that's possible, but we will look into using different words, and maybe overcome some of our obstacles that way.

Speaking of words, "cellular phone" is not a part of the proposal, but rather "mobile phone device". While I agree this does have a certain ring - hehe - to it that makes one think of a specific time period/type of technology, it is a rather broad term, much like the one you suggested. I don't see any reason why we couldn't change it though, so that'll be part of our considerations.

The biggest problem, of course, would be the specifications of megabytes etc., which clearly makes it bound to our own level of technology. But I'm not sure what to put there instead.

I hope positive relations between our delegations is the way of the future, despite my superior's space-phobia."

[States of Glory WA Office]

Speaking of words, "cellular phone" is not a part of the proposal, but rather "mobile phone device". While I agree this does have a certain ring - hehe -

Neville: That pun was bad, and you should feel bad.

[Gnejs]

- "Impossible. Making bad puns feels good, and I don't see that changing anytime soon.

In other news, we will look to implement some changes to our draft, based on the discussion, but it'll likely be a day or two."

[Jarish Inyo]

So, companies are punished because of the stupidity of a few tourist? How is it the companies at fault? And what about people that use hotel phones to make long distance calls? Should the hotel have to eat the cost of those calls too? And how do you propose that the WA enforce this this punishment?

[Calladan]

So, companies are punished because of the stupidity of a few tourist? How is it the companies at fault? And what about people that use hotel phones to make long distance calls? Should the hotel have to eat the cost of those calls too? And how do you propose that the WA enforce this this punishment?

I might be misreading the current act, but I can not see anything about punishment in it - at least not in the active part of the proposal (at the end).

All it does it ask the operators to stop gouging people for two hours of a call just because they aren't connecting to a domestic provider, which doesn't seem unreasonable, and to inform anyone connecting to their network of what the charges will be when they connect (so that users get a fair idea of what they are paying) which again - not unreasonable.

[Jarish Inyo]

So, companies are punished because of the stupidity of a few tourist? How is it the companies at fault? And what about people that use hotel phones to make long distance calls? Should the hotel have to eat the cost of those calls too? And how do you propose that the WA enforce this this punishment?

I might be misreading the current act, but I can not see anything about punishment in it - at least not in the active part of the proposal (at the end).

All it does it ask the operators to stop gouging people for two hours of a call just because they aren't connecting to a domestic provider, which doesn't seem unreasonable, and to inform anyone connecting to their network of what the charges will be when they connect (so that users get a fair idea of what they are paying) which again - not unreasonable.

It is punishing a company for the stupidity of non customers. One knows that when using a their device outside of their coverage area, they are going to be charged more. And people have to enter an international prefix to make the call. So why should the company be forced to give free time to non customers? Why should they be forced to shoulder the cost of of those calls?

[Separatist Peoples]

It is punishing a company for the stupidity of non customers. One knows that when using a their device outside of their coverage area, they are going to be charged more. And people have to enter an international prefix to make the call. So why should the company be forced to give free time to non customers? Why should they be forced to shoulder the cost of of those calls?

"Why is that an assumed fact? One could easily be near a coverage border without being aware. These borders change frequently as technology adapts and companies expand and retract. How should anybody know when they have moved into a competitor's area of coverage? Why should a person be charged for a transaction they did not agree with? Your entire argument takes the basic precepts of contractual transactions and throws it entirely out the window, Ambassador Nameless. If one did not outwardly manifest an intention to bargain for an exchange of performance or promises, one cannot form a contract. Here, the parties are the individual who is moving between zones and the service provider, and the exchange of consideration is the provider's access to service and the individual's promise to pay for that access. Where, then, has the individual manifested any intention to agree to this exchange? Why should it be implied? If they use that service, they should be charged, but for merely moving lawfully within their borders, they have assented to no exchange."

[Jarish Inyo]

How should anybody know when they have moved into a competitor's area of coverage?

Devices do have and give some kind of warning when one is not on their network provider. Plus one can check their coverage area before hand.

Why should a person be charged for a transaction they did not agree with?

They agreed to the transaction when they used the network.

Your entire argument takes the basic precepts of contractual transactions and throws it entirely out the window,

Actually, it doesn't. The person has contracted with a provider in their nation. They have not contracted with a provider in the nation they are visiting. They use their device in an other nation, then they are charged what the network provider in that area charges.

If they use that service, they should be charged, but for merely moving lawfully within their borders, they have assented to no exchange.

We'll have to disagree on that fact. If one travels outside of their coverage and use their device, they should pay extra for using an other provider's network. But as this proposal wants to make network provides to give free services to tourist traveling internationally, not domestically. I'm sorry, but I can't believe that one travelling to an other nation or out of their coverage doesn't know that they are out of their network or that they will be charged extra for phone calls and data usage.

[States of Glory WA Office]

OOC: This is why I don't believe that mobile networks should be legislated on by the WA. I can't understand a damn thing and I have no idea where to start in terms of doing research.