The Officially Unofficial Floor Directory of The WAHQ

[Unibot III]

For the visually impaired: This image shows a sign of a lighthouse similar to those used on roads and in parks.

This image header states that this is The Officially Unofficial Floor Directory Of The World Assembly Headquarters and it was organized by U.N.I.B.O.T.

INTRODUCTION

---

Eduard Heir was finishing his work for the day as he nailed a "lighthouse" sign onto one of the entrance lobby's main walls, just above the portrait of Secretary-General Catherine Gratwick which swung precariously as Heir finished hammering the final nail through the drywall. He stood back and marveled at his work with a nod of approval.

Percy, his assistant caught a glimpse of his boss as he scurried through the lobby. The pubescent errands-boy put his hand on Heir's shoulder and addressed him rather sternly for a gawky teenager.

"Hey Eddy, we've been looking around for you all da--*LIKE* WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" asked Percy.

"It's official U.N.I.B.O.T business," explained Eduard casually.

"You don't work for Unibot anymore, Eddy. Unibot is *like* gone, finished, done, politically vanquished and eaten alive by its Siamese twin in the womb. Remember!?" said Percy, worried for Eduard's sanity again.

"No... no. U-N-I-B-O-T. The Universal Nautical Institute of Buoyage Oversight and Transportation, establishe--" said Eduard.

Percy interrupted him abrutedly, "-ed by GA#104. I know, I *like* suggested the name. But you don't work for U.N.I.B.O.T !!"

Eduard frowned, "yes, yes I do. I was in Unibot for years, I still have my papers."

"Argh," said Percy in frustration. "This would set a horrible precedent: imagine if every ambassador thought they could be *like* a member of any committee they wanted... it would be madness, Kennyites on the Human Rights commission, Knootians on the Food Welfare committee, Urgenchis in the International Drug Education Agency... nothing would ever get done!"

"On the contrary, Old man Mongkha has a nose for great opium," said Eduard dancing verbal circles around his poor colleague. "Listen, none of those people could join Unibot."

"WHY can't they join U.N.I.B.O.T?" asked Percy, growing weary of this discussion.

"Because Unibot doesn't exist anymore, silly," said Eduard with a boyish grin.

Percy grumbled and backed off; he turned adjacent to his boss, taking a deep breath to vent. Eduard smiled and turned back to look at his handiwork, the sign glimmering in the light. It had been a busy day for the former billionaire playboy.

"So, *like* what's the shtick, what are you doing with the sign?" asked Percy, sighing subtly.

Eduard glanced back at Percy, "Me? I'm not doing anything... but the U.N.I.B.O.T has a new initiative."

"What's the new initiative, Eddy?" asked Percy. "It doesn't have anything to do with your conspiracy theories about *like* the cleaning ladies again, right?"

"DAMMIT, Percy," shouted Eduard. "You and I both know that those cleaning ladies' are up to something! Nonetheless, you truculent truant, this has nothing to do with one of my so-called "conspiracy" theories. Have you ever noticed that we all keep filing our requests for office-spaces through the slot in the OBM's office? And have you ever found it suspicious that no-one ever enters and leaves the OBM's office!? I've only ever gotten letters from the OBM and even then, it's never about my office-space request, it's a receipt! Think about it: The OBM has spent no more than three dollars a year, continually claims hundreds of thousands of dollars a year in profit from rental fees and almost no one but a few Secretariat and Old Guard delegations have properly, fixed office-space."

Percy's eyebrow's lifted, "You know, I hadn't thought of it *like* that. How odd. But.. *like* what are you going to do with the lighthouse thingy?"

Eduard smiled, "I have planted a lantern at the top of the roof and flotation devices on all the floors so that I could officially registered the World Assembly Headquarters as a standard G-4D class lighthouse. Convenientally, because we're surrounded by water and on neutral property, the U.N.I.B.O.T is required to signage and map our area for the "safety" of travelers."

"Impressive, but what *like* hazards will travelers come across in the Headquarters?" asked Percy.

"WA Delegations, Cafeteria food, The Strangers' Bar etc. It's all in good cheer, whatever we sneak into the inevitable "floor directory" that the U.N.I.B.O.T will have to compose," said Eduard.

AND SO IT BEGINS....

RULES AND PROTOCOL FOR REQUESTING ENTRIES ON THE FLOOR DIRECTORY (SUBJECT TO CHANGE)

---

The Officially Unofficial Floor Directory of The World Assembly Headquarters is based on a similar concept from the UNHQ.

1. If your national delegation would like its office recognized on the directory, I recommend that you use the format, "@@NATION@@ WA Offices" OR "@@NATION@@ WA Mission Offices".
   
   
2. You may know of some services provided in the WAHQ (e.g., bookstores, cafeterias, bars, candy-shops, saloons, libraries, bawdy houses) or meeting-rooms and offices for clubs or think-tanks or WA organizations or interest-groups or religious-groups or NGOs .. etc., that's totally fine for inclusion into the Unofficial Floor Directory.
   
   
3. Many ambassadors have done some exploring and found various secret passageways, enchanted statues and stuff that's off the beaten path which other ambassadors may be interested in -- that's totally fine for inclusion as well.
   
   
4. Perhaps your delegation is pushing to have some hallway renamed after an old, honored or dishonored WA/UN delegation or ambassador or country, whatever or maybe there's some existing memorials (*cough* *cough*) already or some historical sites (e.g., pie fights, where your ambassador lost his/her virginity) that you'd like recognized in the Directory -- that's fine too.
   
   
5. What's not fine? Breaking the secretariat rules (flamebaiting/trolling) for one thing.
   
   
6. If your entry includes another nation by name, get permission from them to include that entry (e.g., Committee on Un-Unibotian Activities).
   
   
7. The World Assembly is fifty stories tall. Why? Because there were fifty WA resolutions when the General Assembly was created. If that was good enough of a foundation then, I guess it should be enough of a structural foundation too, eh? Eh? Okay, not satisfied, there's an Astral Plane that doesn't follow any sort of logic or anything -- you can have an office in the first (in the NSUN HQ ????) or nine thousandth floor in the Astral Plane, for all I care.
   
   
8. Do you want the whole floor to yourself? Yeah I can't do that, but if you write in the description that your delegation only recognizes yourself on the floor or maybe you're at war or something with someone else on the floor, you can have it read as though your delegation obstinately refuses to recognize the other delegations on the floor with them.
   
   
9. Some room of yours is supposed to be in a different dimension or is the past or future or something crazy like that? Include that in the description.
   
   
10. All committees will be randomly given home floors in the directory, if you're the author of the resolution, I'll allow you to suggest a relocation to a different floor.
    
    
11. If it's just a plain-jane office or the title of the establishment is self-explanatory, feel free to not use a description.
    
    
12. In the future, we will allow fraction floors for extra-fun, like the 5½th Floor. But not until we fill out the list a bit.
    
    
13. Um, no more than say... two offices for any given nation, why two? Because.. um... that's the same number of testicles or ovaries as you're allowed too. >_>
    
    
14. Other than that, you're allowed to keep posting as many requests as you want to include stuff in the directory.
    
    
15. Have fun, be creative and try to be polite.

This is the format for requests:

Code: Select all

[b]Name (NAME OF THE ENTRY, NOT YOUR COUNTRY):[/b]

[b]Floor:[/b]

[b]Description (Approx. no more than 500 characters with spaces):[/b]

Here's an example post:

Name: Unibotian WA Mission Offices

Floor: 14

Description: A scotch-cabinet with the lock combo: C-A-T-C-H-M-Y-2-2-B-I-T-C-H

[Unibot III]

BASEMENT

---

_B-36

• Subterranean Lizard People caverns beneath the earth abandoned after a devastating war with the Crab People, for use with conducting monstrous experiments on embassy staff and conspiring with the Illuminati and Reverse Vampires.

_B-12

• Most Glorious Offices
  • Taking up the entire level, the Most Glorious Offices provide ample room for Observer Pejorative to stretch out as well as a cot for Dr. Leary to be tossed on when he's passed out.

_B-7

• The Bottomless Money Pit
  • A deep chasm in the sewers of the WAHQ where tax “donations” of the World Assembly are dumped almost daily for no particular reason. Some clever GAO accountants dubbed it “rat welfare”.

_B-6

_B-5

• One (1) empty broom closet to be used for the deposition of Security Council petitions submitted to the Snefaldian Embassy,

_B-4

_B-3

_B-2

_B-1

FLOORS 0-17

---

_{GROUND FLOOR}

• Portals in and out of the building
• All physical entrances and exits lead to the Luxian WA Offices if you will it so.
• Ship Dock
• Lobby and waiting rooms
• Boardroom of the World Assembly Nautical Commission
• Welcome Centre and Registration

_{FIRST FLOOR}

• The General Assembly
  
  • Where WA members debate how to improve the world, one resolution at a time.
• Boardroom of the ULC Executive Committee
• International Gemological Agency
• A place where Aram Koopman likes to chill
  • A bit of the lobby cordoned off by yellow and black tape and a masculine sign that says 'MEN AT WORK'. In truth this is the place where Aram is working to dig a hole under the foundation of the building. His many years of planning to set fire to the WAHQ having failed, he now believes that explosions would accomplish the job more effectively. The vague smell of sulphur that emanates from the hole is evidence, according to the Knootian ambassador, that the World Assembly is in fact built upon some sort of rift in reality leading directly to the deepest pits of Hell.
• WA Observatory Offices of the Dh'arconian Reich of Milograd
  • A single office, a small sign hangs upon its wooden door, "Room 101; knock before entering." It is said to have been abandoned many years ago, but if one listens closely they can hear screams and drunken banter emanating from the room in the later hours of night.
• Office of the Organization for Electoral Assistance

_{SECOND FLOOR}

• Freedomstaki WA Mission Office aka Handicapped-Accessible Restroom
  • A handicap-accessible restroom assigned to Freedomstaki for their mission. Not that the Ambassador minds because it comes in quiet handy when decently smashed. Consists of a toilet with a LCD TV overhanging it, a folding table with a laptop on it and some steel chairs and a file cabinet. Plus two fridges. One for food, one for beer. Lots & lots of beer. Can get very noisy when heated debates occur in the cavernous GA chamber below which is separated from the office by a thin sheetrock wall.

_{THIRD FLOOR}

• Office of the International Food Welfare Organization
• Omigodtheykilledkenny WA Offices
• The Palentine WA Offices
  • The Palentine's office is located on the third floor, thanks to some bribes....err....gifts to the Staff of the WA Building Management. The Suite has offices, a shower, shooting range, and a well stocked bar. There is also a aquarium tank large enough for a couple of Dolphins, at the entryway. thanks to a portal located in the tank, it is staffed by a revolving staff of Palentine Naval Dolphins. These foul mouthed scourges of the southern seas act as greeters to the various guests wishing to do business with the Palentine delgation. Guests that run the gauntlet will find various staff members busy at work or downloading porn from the internet. Some of the male members of the delegation will also be ogling Senator Sulla's very buxom secretary, Velma Wong. What you ask? Because she once was a very popular burlesque star. Guests be warned.....ogling is fine, touching is not allowed, and will be punished by a damn fine right cross from Ms. Wong. Finally we enter the nest of depravity known as Senator Sulla's Office, which could probally be best described as something from either the very bowels of hell, or President Manuelo Fernanda's bedroom. It depends on how you look at such matters. It is believed that a portal exists to the Palentine in the office as well.
• Mahaj WA Office
  • A normal office located on the third floor for use by the Mahaj Ambassador.
• Office of the World Assembly Emergency Crop Program
• The WA Mission & Office Three Weasels' DoT Collective
  • Like everything with Three Weasels they required three offices because it's a tradition for them for things to be done in threes, hence, there are three, naturally lit offices equipped with meadows. These meadows have St Augstine Grass and wild flowers growing in it. The desk and chairs are made of birch. There are extra large water bottles affixed next to the next with fridges for storing cheese tributes as well as a replicator which dispense any required item based on vocal input. There are windows on three sides (three is very important) and their room numbers are all in threes.
• Separatist People's Office Suite
  • Third Floor Men's Bathroom, furnished in teal and white tile. There are five urinals and two stalls on the right wall. Two stalls and three sinks on the near part of the left wall. In the right front corner, there is a large, fake potted plant. the desk of Ambassador Sa'Diablo sits squarely in the middle of the bathroom, while interns use the tops of file cabinets as desks inside the stalls. One large opaque glass window is situated at the very back of the bathroom behind the Ambassador's desk.

_{FOURTH FLOOR}

• Boardroom and Office for Charlotte Ryberg's WA Delegation
  • Next to the Boardroom of the International Humanitarian Aid Coordination Committee. It has step-free access.

• Boardroom of the International Humanitarian Aid Coordination Committee

_{FIFTH FLOOR}

• The World Assembly Strangers' Bar
  • The third generation of the renowned pub, managed by Neville NotThatOne Chamberlain. The quintessential establishment for a morning/noon/afternoon/whatever drink – avoid the tea.
• The Fischistani Delegational Mancave
  • When at the main entrance to the WAHQ, face the Stranger's Bar, and turn exactly e^{281.02^(1/4)} degrees clockwise. Walk straight until you hit a wall of the building, and then do interpretive dancing while wailing like a dolphin. A trapdoor opens up above you, and you are sucked into it by a powerful vacuum. The mancave is a 20 meter by 40 meter room, with each wall consisting of one giant plasma television. In the center of the room there is a 20Ghz supercomputer intended for gaming and, rarely, typing up resolutions. pressign Ctrl+Alt+Delete teleports you back to the lobby.
• Soviet Canuckistan WA Offices
  • A small bright office that stinks of vodka and printer ink.
• A four-room office suite for use as a massage parlor/opium den/5-diamond fine dining establishment,
• Wheeled States of Bifid WA Office
  • Closest office to the elevator with a intricate lift system set up behind the delegate's desk for emergency exit. An aged computer sets on a simple desk which is littered with WA proposals. A wide screen hi-definition television is mounted on the wall next to the door which is opposite the delegate's desk. On the wall to the right of the door is a full bar. On the left is a bookcase filled with books on widely varying subjects from international law to "How to Attract That Perfect Someone.

_{SIXTH FLOOR}

• Discoverian WA Office
  • A large well-lit room finished in chrome, glass and white marble tiles. The entrance is dominated by a tall bank of screens with scrolling updates on WA debates and delegates. Junior staff sit at several desks with computers. Huge bookshelves hold volumes on previous WA law. The Ambassador has a large desk at the back of the room. The wall behind the desk holds a large world map, and there are flags on either side: a Union Flag, a WA flag, Esteria's flag, and the Discoverian Sol Invictus flag.

_{SEVENTH FLOOR}

• Former Bontivate WA Office
  • Cleared out and abandoned, the office has been retained under the protection of Damanucus, to prevent annexing to another delegation's (since they already know what happens when their office gets annexed on departure: they get given a cleaning store as an office upon return).
• Felixian WA Offices
  • A large office, with Arthur's desk, a bookshelf mostly containing Harry Potter and World Assembly books, a television, a DVD player and the entire DVD collection of World Assembly.

• World Assembly Responsible Offshore Drilling Administration

_{EIGHTH FLOOR}

_{NINTH FLOOR}

• World Assembly Office of Building Management
• Gatesville Station
  • The squatter-ridden monorail station between the WAHQ and the SCHQ, named after the infamous National Sovereignist region whose condemnation was the first to be considered in the SCHQ – although ultimately rejected. The choice of floor number is in honour of SC#9.
• World Microcredit Foundation

_{TENTH FLOOR}

Cerberion Office of Strategic Wrangling (WA Division)
• The large offices of the Cerberion representatives is blocked by a huge steel door bearing the sign:
  Beware of the Happy People.

_{ELEVENTH FLOOR}

Sanctarian WA Mission Offices
• A large suite, with four different rooms, each serving as an office; the largest of these offices serves as the Sanctarian Ambassador to the WA's Office.

_{TWELFTH FLOOR}

• Damanucus WA Offices
  • A divided room with a simple wooden desk, basic wooden bookshelf, and a massive pile of faulty electronics apparently given as "donations" to the delegation. For some reason, the small Damanucan flag sits above a sign saying "Electronic Waste".
• New Edomite World Assembly Permanent Mission Offices
  • Fine grained oak paneling, soft intricately woven rugs, an air of peace and quiet, mysterious and quaint statuary and busts decorate this place. A stuffed blue, white and yellow carnivorous bird stands in a corner of the outer office. The Mission staff run a barbershop on the side, and there is a red and white striped pole outside the office to reflect this fact.

_{THIRTEENTH FLOOR}

• Office of the WA Commission on Human Rights

_{FOURTEENTH FLOOR}

• Unibotian WA Mission Offices
  
  • A scotch-cabinet with the lock combo: C-A-T-C-H-M-Y-2-2-B-I-T-C-H
• Universal Nautical Institute of Buoyage Oversight and Transportation
• Boardroom of the General Assembly Border Demarcation Organization

_{FIFTEENTH FLOOR}

• Air duct vent above the non-human invisible tree sapient fungi restrooms (assuming fungi need to poop),
  • An Astral plane aperture is in the Air duct.

_{SIXTEENTH FLOOR}

• WA General Accounting Office
• Frisbeeterian Associates, PLLC
  • Appears to be a plain door painted on an otherwise blank wall, stenciled "EXIT ONLY". Adjacent is a button labelled "Contact Us". When pressed, a small flap opens up revealing the phrase, "All Things In Moderation".
• Permanent Mission of the Moderately Liberal Unitary Republic of Goobergunchia to the World Assembly
  • The notoriously large office suite housing the Goobergunchian WA delegation includes comfortable and spacious living quarters for Ambassador Michael Evif as well as offices and smaller bedrooms for other Goobergunchian WA staff.
• Former Boardroom of the Defunct Monument Assessment Committee

_{SEVENTEENTH FLOOR}

• Epidemic and Pandemic Alert and Response Center
• Office of the Global Emigration, Security, Travel And Passport Organisation

[Unibot III]

FLOORS 18-35

---

_{EIGHTEENTH FLOOR}

• The Health Research & Development Division
• International Drug Education Agency

_{NINETEENTH FLOOR}

• Boardroom of the Cultural Heritage Preservation Committee
• Former Boardroom of the Defunct World Assembly Water Purification Treatment
• Boardroom of the Consumer Product Safety Council

_{TWENTIETH FLOOR}

• Boardroom of the International Meteorological Organisation
• World Identity Theft Advisory Database Servers

_{TWENTY-FIRST FLOOR}

• Office of the World Health Authority
• The Coordination of Space Consortium
• International Bureau of Water Safety

_{TWENTY-SECOND FLOOR}

• International Courthouse for Multilateral Prosecution
• International Criminal Court
• Designated Speech Area for the ICC
  • An area set aside for protesters who often are arguing for the dissolution of the ICC and angrily question the legitimacy of the court. During a "boring" case like the trials of genocidal war-rape aficionados, these rooms are mostly used as lunch rooms or for its shuffleboard.

_{TWENTY-THIRD FLOOR}

• Planet X World Assembly Internal Subversion Office
  • The Planet X World Assembly Internal Subversion Office is used as shared office space for all member nations of the Planet X region, often including non-WA nations in our region, who use quantum teleportation to secretly get into the office and bypass all security. It takes up exactly 1/23rd of the 23rd floor, and has 23 nudist diplomatic personnel who all work 23 hours a day trying to subvert the World Assembly from the inside. There are 23 large-screen AMOLED displays that are used to constantly monitor activities of other nations' ambassadors and regions' delegates, which receive signals from spy cameras secretly installed all over every room of the WA Headquarters, including the main building and the Astral Plane. The 23 personnel are also all expert hackers and have hacked into all other computers at the WA, and often subtly change the text of legislation right before it is submitted in order to introduce fatal flaws that only get noticed later, thus leading to a high rate of repeal for WA legislation. These 23 naked underlings are all overseen by the ambassador from Subgeniustan, a mysterious figure who is a master at spycraft and whose true identity is unknown even to co-workers.

_{TWENTY-FOURTH FLOOR}

• Phing Phong WA Mission Office
  • The flooring is made from rice straw, covered in a large hand-woven rug, and ornate teak wall panelling lines the office. The Ambassador to the WA alternates between the General Assembly and the Strangers' Bar, occasionally visiting the mission for a power-nap. Anyone seen with meat on Floor 24 can expect a volley of stationery from Phing Phong's irate vegetarian staff. Interdenominational Buddhist worship services are held here at 0900 UCT every day.
• Ossitanian WA Offices
  • What initially appears to a simple, if luxurious, suite of offices is quickly revealed, upon closer inspection, to be an eldritch place where the strange and known are unnaturally married in chaos and mirth. Many of the angles in the complex are impossible and the planes of all the different surfaces shouldn't come together - but they do. May occasionally require a medical mask to enter when the walls start leaking ichor and other foul humours.
• Camian WA Mission
  • A cozy little suite. A nice reception area, small board room, a couple offices, WiFi connections, and a personal coffee bar. But nothing compares to the highlight of the office: The miniature ice hockey rink used for recreation when solitaire get too boring. This little rink is 20 feet long by 8.5 feet wide!
• Official WA Office of RB Rebecca Black
  • Spacious office with a large class window, standard desk, and many bookshelves.

_{TWENTY-FIFTH FLOOR}

• Gotha's WA Office
  • Located directly across from the elevator. The inside of the office contains an incredible amount of automatic machine guns, flamethrowers, and other defense measures. The rooms only closet is rumored to contain various different oddities, such as a portal to another dimension or a strange mutant creature.

_{TWENTY-SIXTH FLOOR}

• Boardroom of the World Assembly Numismatics Authority

_{TWENTY-SEVENTH FLOOR}

• Office of the Gatchinan WA Delegation
  • Two rooms farthest away from everything. The floors are made of white marble, while the walls are made of the wood panelling per the Emperor’s nonsense dictate. The Ambassador required an aquarium, a BBQ grill and an obnoxiously large mahogany desk. There is no electricity, as the Ambassador insists on light rooms with torches, and types memos on a 1912 Smith & Corona typewriter. There are also multiple locks on the door as they have little trust for the cleaning ladies.

_{TWENTY-EIGHTH FLOOR}

• Former Pilgrims WA Office

• Cleared out and abandoned, the office has been retained under the protection of Damanucus, to prevent annexing to another delegation's (since they already know what happens when their office gets annexed on departure: they get given a cleaning store as an office upon return).

• Boardroom of the Clinical Excellence Commission
• United States of Philimbesi WA Offices
  • Nothing fancy, just an office, we'll commandeer more if we need to.
• International Measurements Institute
• Museums of Musical Heritage Database Servers
• Missing Individuals Archive

_{TWENTY-NINTH FLOOR}

• Office for Education Exchange
• Universal Patent Archive

_{THIRTIETH FLOOR}

_{THIRTY-FIRST FLOOR}

• Former WA Veteran Assistance Offices
• World Assembly Seedbank

_{THIRTY-SECOND FLOOR}

• World Assembly Food and Drug Regulatory Agency

_{THIRTY-THIRD FLOOR}

• GM Foods Database Servers

_{THIRTY-FOURTH FLOOR}

• Stem Cell and Alternative Treatment Research Office
  

_{THIRTY-FIFTH FLOOR}

• Stefannica WA Mission Offices
  • The working offices of the Stefannican delegation, led by the Permanent Representative. It is here where hardworking and competent diplomats work to advance Stefannican policy, security, and issues related to the World Assembly.

[Unibot III]

FLOORS 36-50

---

_{THIRTY-SIXTH FLOOR}

_{THIRTY-SEVENTH FLOOR}

• Former Boardroom of the Defunct Global Organization for Public Safety
• World Assembly Disaster Bureau

_{THIRTY-EIGHTIETH FLOOR}

• International Expositions Authority Offices

• Former Boardroom of the Defunct Return Home Safe Agency
• Former Boardroom of the Defunct World Assembly Time Board

_{THIRTY-NINTH FLOOR}

• Former, now Defunct Extinction Preparation Research Facility
  • Now used by Eduard Heir as a Greenhouse for growing... hemp and ... stuff. Also, the research laboratory makes a fantastic poolroom.

_{FORTIETH FLOOR}

• Office of the WA Scientific Programme

_{FORTY-FIRST FLOOR}

• The World Assembly Demining Agency

_{FORTY-SECOND FLOOR}

• Former Boardroom of the Defunct International Coordinated Relief Committee
• Office of the International Radiocommunications Commission
• Quelesian WA "Office"
  • A single stall in the men's restroom on the 42nd floor serves as Alexandria Yadoru's office. Multiple requests to the WA Building Management bureaucracy for better office accomodations have received no response. Toilet paper is at a premium. Alexandria has taped a paper sign on the restroom door saying "Please flush the toilets when you are finished!" Sadly, this sign is oh so frequently ignored by her male colleagues.

_{FORTY-THIRD FLOOR}

• Microgrant Institute
• International Geological and Metallurgical Laboratory

_{FORTY-FOURTH FLOOR}

• Former Boardroom of the Defunct World Assembly Environmental Council
• Nuclear Testing Oversight Agency

_{FORTY-FIFTH FLOOR}

• Boardroom of the WA Endangered Species Committee
• WA Delegation of the Federal Replic of Merfurian
  • Near the lift (or elevator for all American users). Two offices - both offices-cum-sleeping quarters. First - and large - office for the Chief Ambassador and his Deputy. Second office - for the rest of the Delegation - including the Resolutions Monitor, Researcher, Merfurian-WA Bilateral Relations Specialist, Merfurian Compliance Analyst, Resolution Applicability Analyst, Constitutional Analyst (normally a Justice on secondment from the Constitutional Court - ensures that Resolutions conform with the Constitution)
• Office of the Global Initiative for Basic Education
• Boardroom of the World Assembly Oil Transportation Committee

_{FORTY-SIXTH FLOOR}

_{FORTY-SEVENTH FLOOR}

• Zaklen WA Offices
  • Somewhat near the elevator, there's a closet that when opened, leads into a pocket dimension containing the Zaklenite WA Representative's office.

_{FORTY-EIGHTH FLOOR}

• Boardroom of the World Assembly Trade Commission
• Auralian WA Offices
  • Large, comfortable offices used by the WA delegation from Auralia
• Boardroom of the International Transport Safety Committee
• Boardroom of the International Trade Administration

_{FORTY-NINTH FLOOR}

• Frenequesta WA Offices, proudly sponsored by the Braithwaite Group"
  • A plain wooden door sporting the Frenequestan flag and the tag “L. Ersthauer, Freneq WA Ambassador” conceals one lobby and six rooms with fine workstations, desks, a direct video-phone line to Neue Bayreuth, virtual reality poker and blackjack, a few slot machines, and a hot tub on the balcony. WARNING: Plasma lighting may disturb some. The Freneq Government, the WA, the Braithwaite Group, or any related entities shall not be held liable for any injury, illness, or seizure suffered.
• Boardroom of the Nuclear Disaster Response Organization

_{FIFTIETH FLOOR}

• Sovreignry WA Offices
  
  • The offices farthest from the elevator. Requests to OBM for a move have been unanswered.
• Database Of Clinical Treatments Under Study Servers

ABOVE THE WORLD ASSEMBLY HQ

---

_{ATTACHED TO THE ROOF}

• The FAV Columbidae, housing the Falcanian Delegation to the World Assembly
  • A decommissioned prewar airborne carrier, the Columbidae was rechristened to reflect its change of role (and to appease WA planning officials worried that the "FAV Warspite" would be permanently chained to the building). Access to the 600-foot vessel is obtained by means of an alarmingly rickety rope ladder. Despite housing as many as 20 warplanes during the war, now the vessel mainly consists of massive helium cells, unusually drafty offices, and Ser Petear's extensive collection of fragile objects.

_{TWENTY-FIVE STORIES ABOVE}

• Mooring pad for Snefaldian Airforce Diplomatic Blimp & Fast Food Shack The Hindenburger With Fries.

Upon the top of the physical structure of the World Assembly is the Astral Plane -- its existence is disputed by those who cannot see it, more enlightened residents of the World Assembly contend it is the only real part of the World Assembly. It follows no laws of logic nor any scientific laws. BE CAREFUL THOUGH, upon reaching the Astral Plane it can be difficult to return to the physical world!


THE ASTRAL PLANE OF THE WORLD ASSEMBLY

---

_{THREE HUNDREDTH-AND-SEVENTH FLOOR}

• The Grand Old Offices of the Astrolinian Permanent World Assembly Mission
  • Once upon a time, there was the 307th Floor of WAHQ. Then Dr. Giovanni Romero got a hold of it, and now there is a tasteful Roman-style villa wedged between floors 306 and 308, complete with authentic* art deco offices and a working** space-time manipulator stall. The ducts in the ceiling provide a direct route to the ducts above the Strangers' Bar.

_{FOUR-HUNDREDTH-SIXTY-SEVENTH FLOOR}

• Mad Sheep Railgun. It is a railgun, mounted on the backs of enslaved people who look like Hitler. It fires sheep. It is possibly also operated by sheep.
  • It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

_{FOUR-HUNDREDTH-SIXTY-EIGHTH FLOOR}

• Mad Sheep Railgun. It is a railgun, mounted on the backs of enslaved people who look like Hitler. It fires sheep. It is possibly also operated by sheep.
  • It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.

_{FIVE THOUSAND AND FIRST FLOOR}

• A place where Aram Koopman likes to chill
  • A small broom closet requested by Aram Hoopman as his personal study because, quoting a popular meme, he wanted his "Power level to be over 5000". The room has a window from which Aram throws annoying people whom he wants "permanently" defenestrated. Eduard Heir has a standing invitation to come and visit. This room is also where Aram stores his suitcase nukes.

_{X(Y^THIRTY)=NINTH FLOOR}

• The *actual* Knootian WA Offices
  • Located somewhere in the World Assembly building it can be reached only by an act of will. Focus really hard on wanting to get to the office while you wander the endless corridors of the fractally inconsistent building, and you might get there. If you just get lost and wander the halls forever until you die, you probably just didn't want it enough. Inside the office there is furniture because Knootoss is a civilised country. There is also a device to hack into other delegations' wifi which is more expensive than an actual wifi modem would ever be.

[The Grim Repealer]

It has come to The Grim Repealer's attention that the Nautical Pilotage Act, which established the "Universal Nautical Institute of Buoyage Oversight and Transportation", has been repealed on June 17th, 2012. The Grim Repealer therefore notes that this committee, with no duties, was therefore dissolved. The Grim Repealer therefore believes that these are intruders to the WA Building, usurping the power of a more suitable, still existing bureaucracy such as the Global Emigration, Security, Travel and Passport Organization.

~From the Desk of The Grim Repealer~

[Louisistan]

Name: Offices of The Delegation of Louisistan to the World Assembly

Floor: 6

Description: For reasons unknown the office suite of Louisistan has been assigned the number 7853 #3B, 1-4, although being directly next to a room simply designated "office 6-5". The Louisistanians love buerocracy, so the offices holds many officals. Behind the large double door lies a lobby where Mrs. Finch, the secretary sits and works. Doors lead to all the other offices in the suite. The largest office has a bronze plaque reading "The General Chancellor of the Council on National Defence". It contains a seperate bathroom, bedroom and office and is never used, because the GCCND has never visited the WA. The second largest office is the office of Special Amabassador Malcolm Fass. It contains a bed and a large collection of scotch and beer - nothing else. It also has a staircase leading directly to the floor below - the stranger's bar. Another large room holds the desks of countless aides assigned to the WA delegation and is next to the conference room. Deputy Ambassador Schulz has an average office. It is also never used, because he is almost always on the GA floor. Lastly, there is a very small office. The sign reads "The Special Attaché for Autodefenestration". For obvious reasons this room has no windows. Unfortunately it also has no light, causing even more autodefenestrations. The post of Special Attaché for Autodefenestration is usually up for hiring every three of four days.