World Cup 93 - RP Thread

by **Audioslavia** » Sat Feb 04, 2023 11:28 am

X00 Years Ago

They shouldn’t have built this stadium here. Not in this part of Gardenia. Fifty years ago, sure, you could have put it here. Fifty years ago, this was all fields and the occasional out-of-town shopping depot. Now, the place was a twisting maze of boxy DIY stores and defunct super casinos. The pawn shops and gold buyers who’d been opening up shop in dead high streets fifty years ago had now come for the suburbs, converting disused supercasinos, talkies and megabowls into warehouses of cheap fourth hand clothes, pop-up stolen-goods stalls and newly legalised “Leisure Centers” for which there were not nearly enough bunny ears in the world. They’d turned Snorthern Upolstery Mattress Warehouse into one of those. All they’d needed was a few hundred quids worth of soundproofing.

Jeremy tipped his flatcap down over his face to *specifically* ignore one such Mattress Warehouse and kept his eye on the prize ahead.

The National Arena had been put up around the same time as the Nuclear plant a few kilometres away over in Scierno. Both places had had a similarly bureaucracy-filled history and both places shared the same concrete-and-vague-handwaves-towards-what-a-middle-manager-assumed-‘style’-was aesthetic. The exterior of the stadium was even pebble-dashed with the same graphite they’d used in the reactor (not the *exact* same graphite, though that would have saved on undersoil heating) and the effect was as shit as it sounded. If you ran your fingers across it you’d lose the fingers. It was supposed to sparkle in the sunlight but it didn’t. There was so much smog that no sunlight got through.

Rows upon rose of plastic trees, hot dog vans and beer tents stood between Jeremy and the entrance to the ground. He almost didn’t notice the young lad staring a hole in the side of his head.

Jeremy half-flinched as the boy came near him. I say ‘boy’. Jeremy reckoned him to be about 23 but with the look of someone who’d never had to work a day in his life. He recognised the grease marks on his shirt cuffs and hands. Ah. One of them.

“Futusmafist” the boy said, stuffing an amount of thick paper in Jeremy’s right hand. Jeremy nodded and grumbled. The boy’s gaze immediately left the side of Jeremy’s head and made its way towards its next mark.

A few yards down the road, Jeremy peered at his hand to see what he had been given.

The Futuraist Manifesto

Ah yes. Definitely one of those.

You could kind of see where the Futuraists were coming from. Here at the very N of the New World, the possibilities seemed absolutely infinite, especially for the kids. Their grandfathers had paid men to till fields, their fathers had paid men to work mills, and now it seemed that for their generation their job was to drive incredibly fast - at upwards of 20 or even 25 miles per hour, on dirt roads. This guy and his friends at Boarding School had their own personal metal tubes with bits of oil and rubber that whipped them round the streets of the western cities faster than any horse could ever have carried them. They wrestled for right-of-way with double-decker trams. Gargantuan metal tubes were starting to transport them and their friends to and from the most beautiful tropical islands they could ever have dreamt of. And the more the future descended upon them, the more desperately the Futuraists scrambled to make room for it. Churches. Museums. Cemeteries. They All Had to Go. In their place? Things that went *vroom*, as well as a font that they liked and, apparently, association football.

Fittingly enough, the Futuraist Manifesto had eleven entries. One for each position plus the amount of subs you're generally allowed these days.

The Futuraist Manifesto, 19XX wrote:1. We want to sing our love of danger, energy and the long ball game.

2. We want to demolish museums and libraries, fight morality, feminism and all opportunist and utilitarian cowardice.

3. We want to exalt movements of aggression, feverish sleeplessness, the double march, leap, hook, uppercut and sticking it in the mixer

4. We declare that the splendor of the world has been enriched by a new beauty: the beauty of speed. A roaring motor car which seems to run on machine-gun fire. And that our opposition Don't Like It Up Them.

5. We want to sing at the referee, to cast aspersions on the virtue of his parentage.

6. We will follow, follow, wherever our football team will go. We will come there on a Plane and Throw your Tables.

7. But I don't want to pay taxes?

8. Time and Space died yesterday. We are already living in the absolute, since we have already created eternal, omnipresent speed.

9. Beauty exists only in struggle. There is no masterpiece that has not an aggressive character. Football must be a violent assault on the forces of the unknown, to force them to bow before man.

10. We don't use Helvetica here. I mean look at the name mate.

11. We will sing of the great crowds agitated by work, pleasure and revolt; the multi-colored and polyphonic surf of revolutions in modern capitals: the nocturnal vibration of the arsenals and the workshops beneath their violent electric moons: the gluttonous railway stations devouring smoking serpents; factories suspended from the clouds by the thread of their smoke; bridges with the leap of gymnasts flung across the diabolic cutlery of sunny rivers: adventurous steamers sniffing the horizon; great-breasted locomo

'holy fuckin sh** shut the c*** up' thought Jeremy, taking the leaflet and tucking it into a gap in the concrete between him and the seat behind him. He tried momentarily to convince himself that he had not been quite so righteous, quite so thoughtless or quite so absurd as a 23 year-old. It felt like a life time ago.

It was only about ten years ago, though. If that.

The stadium, like most modern ones, had an electronic scoreboard. Jeremy wrapped his scarf tightly around himself and watched as the lower line etched out a rudimentary SQUORNSHELOUS in glowing strips.

He could hardly blame the Futuraists. This New Football World, with Audioslavia seemingly in the epicentre of it from the off, was intoxicating. Jeremy found himself already looking forward to the next instalment of the World Cup. Just a few months and about seven qualifying matches stood in their way, the first of which here, today. World Cup 5 Qualifying: Audioslavia (11) vs Squornshelous (Unr)

We should tonk these guys.

Now

Jeremy folded his arms and peered into the glass box. Between the ancient badges, rattles, scarves and player cards was a white booklet. Completely white. Except…

The more you looked at it, the more it looked slightly, but very slightly, like it had once been yellow, with white writing. Even if he’d had his glasses with him, Jeremy figured he wouldn’t properly be able to make it out but, there, on a small stand in front of it, was the number ‘1514’ in altogether more readable blank ink, with THE SPORTS MUSEUM PROJECT stamped underneath.
Jeremy picked his PROJECT GUIDE out of his pocket and thumbed through it until he reached entry number 1514.

FUTURAIST MANIFESTO, 19XX
This manifesto of wide-eyed laddish photo-fascist rich-boy edginess was recovered from a small concrete hole at the now-abandoned National Arena in Former Gardenia. Once yellow with white ink, the cover has faded completely to white due to the after-effects of the Cherno-Bull disaster at the nearby Scierno Nuclear Reactor site.

Consult a tour guide for more information on the Cherno-Bull Disaster

Jeremy didn’t need to consult a tour guide. He knew his history. For him it was just ‘story’. He was there, in the world, if thankfully not in western Audioslavia at the time. He knew the story. He knew of the ethos of the Futuraists - those who will wait for nobody to achieve their aims. He knew of the general practices of the nuclear reactor in Scierno. They were largely the same. Hence the disaster.

He allowed himself a brief moment of enjoyment at the idea of a Futurism Manifesto lying in a museum, and then moved on.

“Thorough job you boys have done here” he said, looking across at one of the two dozen staff members of The Sports Museum Project. “Good work”
“Cheers boss” said one of them, smiling brightly. “We think we’ll still be on to open for the end of the week”
“Good good” said Jeremy, smiling under the rim of his hat. “In time for the game?”
“Opener of World Cup Qualifying?” asked the guy. “Absolutely”

by **Eshialand** » Sat Feb 04, 2023 12:41 pm

Around the World, Flying like Time

Oh, so much has happened in the last 5 years of Eshian soccer. We've had highs, we've had lows... we've had more lows... let's not talk about those, we'll just focus on the highs.

The past 5 years have been a wild ride, and now, it's time to celebrate those years. We'll tell stories of the good old days, watch the future unfold, and most of all, have a lot of fun doing so. At the center of it all? Of course, that will be Eshialand's world tour, aka World Cup XCIII Qualifying. Although it seems likely that it'll be our sixth failure to make it to the big dance, let's just enjoy the journey along the way.

First, the celebration tour begins the same way Eshialand's sporting journey as a whole began; fresh out of the Baptism of Fire. The Owls will begin their campaign by inviting one of the most recent Baptism of Fire nations, who achieved an impressive third place in that tournament, Airannia (186), a team with plenty of potential, and sure to give the Eshian fans at home a wonderful show to begin their campaign, just as all World Cup Qualifying runs should start.

After that, it's a flight to the region of Rushmore as the Eshian team squares off against that of Astograth (88), in probably the most even matchup this cycle. This should be, by all accounts, an absolute nailbiter, exactly the sort of thing to get fans fired up ahead of the meat of this long campaign.

Then, the ponies of Equestria (114) will come to town, providing a splash of magic to this summer's festivities. Eshialand as a nation has had, for the last few years anyway, an interesting relationship with magic for sure. For the most part, we know it's around, and wish to know more about it, but it's remained elusive in this nation, mostly hidden away in corners of the country that most will never visit.

From there, it's a journey to another newer nation like Airannia, also out of their Baptism of Fire this spring, Obrela (223). Although they may not have done the best in that tournament, they're on a definite upward spiral, and hope to make a splash in this group, so expect a fun time over there. It'll be hard to get visitor's seats, however, as their stadiums are far from the largest. Book well in advance if you wanna see this one.

The next team to come to Eshialand after that will be Boring Paradise (155). Nothing really much to say about them. I promise I'm not attempting meta-humor.

Don't blink, as right after that, the Owls will be heading off to visit Murphtannia (UR), the one unranked nation in this tour, although don't mistake them for newcomers. Rather, they're just returning after some time off from the Qualifying scene. If this sounds familiar, maybe you remember Polkopia coming back as an unranked after a break and qualifying for World Cup 89 out of Eshialand's group. Don't underestimate unranked teams, ever.

Then, it's right back home for the next couple days, as two teams who both missed out on World Cup 92 and wish to secure their spots in the finals will be visiting Eshialand. First, a nation who's been to Eshialand before, but not the Eshialand you're thinking of, Valentine Z (50). The first time Eshians interacted with Valentians was at the end of Eshialand's first qualifying cycle, at a post-qualifying gathering hosted by the Valentian team. Remember that one? No? It's the one where the whole Eshian squad got too drunk to play their next friendly. Ah, now you remember it. Don't worry, the Owls will be staying sober for this one, as if they want to go to the playoffs, this is a must-win. And hey, there's never a boring time when Valentians are involved.

A lot of people say that their favorite part of Eshian sports is listening to my ramblings. To that I say, what? There are better sportswriters in the multiverse who you should be reading. Like Jeremy Jaffacake, for example. On a completely unrelated note, the second of two teams in that homestand is Audioslavia (39). We probably won't win that game, but it'll be a fun time.

Then, we're on the road in Ryfenia (274). They are... a team from the BoF. Sadly, that's all I know. I wish I could say more.

The last team visiting us in the first half of Qualifying are StrayaRoos (95). They've come a long way since they first came on the scene in the World Cup 89 cycle, and will definitely be posing a threat here. Apart from that, not too much else to say. Let's not lose though...

Then, we cap off the first half of qualifying visiting the same nation our debut qualifying attempt ended in, and by that I mean Squornshelan Remnant States (13). This match, along with the later one at home on MD22, will be the crown jewels of this world tour. After all, this is the only direct rematch from that first qualifying run, and it just so happens to be at the same spot as it was then; right at the end. The second tie in the SuperDome will sell out quickly, I warn you.

After the first 11 games, we do it all again, this time with home and away reversed. Simple.

So, how are things looking in this group? How will Eshialand fare? Well, a lot of things have changed in the 5 years we've been around. We've met lots of new friends along the way, and played a lot of soccer, that's for sure. One thing hasn't changed however, and that's team optimism. Hopes are definitely high for this to be the Owls' best qualifying yet.

Another thing that hasn't changed is that I don't have a damn clue how all of this is gonna turn out. Cope.

As always, I've been Josh Seametzle. See ya around.

by **Savigliane** » Sat Feb 04, 2023 8:06 pm

click on the image to watch a video from the Interdimensional Travel Task Force's Narrative Department:

Visit ittf-home.svg for more information on ESCAPE and the Savigliano story.

by **Stevencousin** » Sat Feb 04, 2023 8:54 pm

STEVENCOUSIN FOOTBALL ASSOCIATION

MD GAME STADIUM CITY SPONSORSHIP
MD1 Stevencousin v. Graintfjall Federal Unity Stadium Cassaholm VioletFalcon
MD2 Qasden v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD3 Stevencousin v. Natanians and Nosts Federal Unity Stadium Cassaholm Anthro Capital
MD4 Kirungabi v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD5 Stevencousin v. Gyatso-Kai Federal Unity Stadium Cassaholm KeyCommerce
MD6 Canadian Dominion v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD7 Stevencousin v. Adab Federal Unity Stadium Cassaholm Fairborne Computer
MD8 Dod Rava v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD9 Stevencousin v. Yuezhou Federal Unity Stadium Cassaholm Arthurlie Foods
MD10 Ceni v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD11 Stevencousin v. Talamia Federal Unity Stadium Cassaholm Glenwolf Trading
MD12 Graintfjall v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD13 Stevencousin v. Qasden Redfort Camp Brigketh Sabretooth Investment
MD14 Natanians and Nosts v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD15 Stevencousin v. Kirungabi Redfort Camp Brigketh BlackOxygen
MD16 Gyatso-Kai v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD17 Stevencousin v. Canadian Dominion Waxwood Circle Holmdock Spitfire
MD18 Adab v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD19 Stevencousin v. Dod Rava Waxwood Circle Holmdock Sentinel EC
MD20 Yuezhou v. Stevencousin NA NA NA
MD21 Stevencousin v. Ceni Readymann Ground Fixmouth Fingerworth Lubricant
MD22 Talamia v. Stevencousin NA NA NA

Stadium Data
Stadium:: Federal Unity Stadium
Nearest City:: Cassaholm
Capacity:: 98,500
Brief Data:: The biggest stadium in Stevencousin, located in the Carmenzon District to the south of the city center of Stevencousin's capital city, Cassaholm, is an all-seater multi-purpose stadium for international concerts, weddings and sporting events and the home ground of the Stevencousin national football team. It was built by Posquieiras Heavy Engineering and designed by Billingeburg & Co. Interestingly, the stadium is not public property, nor is it managed by a sports association. The owner is the Federal Unity conglomerate group. They sponsor and cover the construction and renovation costs in full, but they also get various government mega-projects afterward.

Stadium:: Redfort Camp
Nearest City:: Brigketh
Capacity:: 26,900
Brief Data:: Redfort Camp was a home base for Brigketh Bishop FC and, Brigketh Salamander rugby club, a multi-purpose stadium in Cheilestorp Creek, Brigketh, Stevencousin. It is currently used mostly for football matches. The stadium has a capacity of 26,900 people. It was built in 2009. In 2013, a mega concert was held there in which Stevenian most popular rock band, The Cassiopeia was the performer. The stadium known for energy and water consumption was targeted to be efficient. Most of the water used by toilets and water taps will be collected during rain-falls, the roof has a 550kW solar power plant, while floodlights are using new generation LED system.

Stadium:: Waxwood Circle
Nearest City:: Holmdock
Capacity:: 31,800
Brief Data:: Waxwood Circle a multi-use stadium in Stigeswaldeford, Waxwood District, Holmdock, Stevencousin. It has both an indoor stadium and an outdoor stadium within its compound. The outdoor stadium can hold a maximum of 31,800 people and is currently used mostly for football matches, serving as the home stadium to Holmdock Highlander FC and The Highlander Academy. The stadium consists of a soccer field, an 8-lane running track, and a fitness center. In addition to sports events, large concerts are also organized by Waxwood Circle, and a series of political rallies and religious gatherings have also taken place here.

Stadium:: Readymann Ground
Nearest City:: Fixmouth
Capacity:: 26,900
Brief Data:: Homeground for Fixmouth Firebolt is a football stadium located in Fixmouth, Stevencousin. The stadium is part of the Fixmouth Sports and Recreation Centre, a community sports facility that includes the stadium as well as a swimming complex. Construction began in September 2007 and finished construction in 2009. The stadium was officially opened and inaugurated in 2010. It was built by Sungard Global and designed by Billingeburg & Co. A new light rail terminal has been built near the stadium for fans' convenience.

by **Nephara** » Sat Feb 04, 2023 10:42 pm

FULL FLIGHT: THE DEFINITIVE HISTORY OF THE CORMORANTS
PART 3: Shoulders of a Giant
Geneva Schwarzer
Part 1: Dawn
Part 2: Breakthrough

Jess Mortlock was the first of what would become many outside candidates to be Cormorants' manager, elevated to the role after just two years as Gethin Ramsey's assistant, having been with the Cormorants as goalkeeping coach before that. A taciturn and solemn woman, she is perhaps underrated in the modern assessment of the Cormorants', yet she won the Cormorants a number of trophies and achieved the breakthrough result in the World Cup. Yet there were also low points, and when her first match was a 1-0 defeat to the Old Guard that immediately knocked them out of the purely-knockout Campionato Esportiva 9, signs were ominous.

Defeat to Saintland in the Strongnesse was a further ominous sign, and for the coming qualifiers, Nephara simply couldn't touch a rampant Valladares side, though they did manage to draw them in Sabrefell. But there was another obstacle in the way. This was World Cup 68, home to a uniquely vicious playoff cycle that claimed a number of key names. Nephara, ranked 30th in the world, were first drawn against the 10th-ranked Mertagne. A brutal, physical match away was won by the Cormorants through a thumping Catheline Harper strike, and a still more grinding return leg at the Farham Arena ended scoreless. Nephara's reward was to face... Farfadillis, then ranked 9th. A vintage Farfadillis, too, the side of Kâí, Fôx, Terán and Tuzzio.

The two matches against Mertagne had returned but a single goal. Nephara's home match against Farfadillis saw ten.

In the opening salvo, Dandalleion forced two sprawling saves from Kieron Riordan, but it was Mâ Âlâmëómë-based Anna Shrike that opened the scoring. Dandalleion did not wait long before equalising, through a brilliant Tuzzio chip that allowed Roga to play him in, but a quick-fire brace from Rook Cathar saw Nephara take a 3-1 lead into the half. The Farves dominated the ball early in the second half, Tuzzio pulled a goal back, but Dale Brightley restored Nephara's advantage against the run of play just before the hour. Dandalleion made it 4-3, and Nephara were tiring badly, with the combination of a sub-modern level of fitness, an intense press and Mortlock's conservative approach to substitutions meaning they were not in the business of finishing strong, but they dragged themselves into making the last ten minutes a bloodbath in their favour. Bittencourt, who had come on for Cathar, made it five, Kâí pulled one back, but Andrea Crowe, a holding midfielder and by no stretch a natural goalscorer, made it 6-4 leading into the second leg in La Fantás.

The tie seemed to hang in the balance, but astute readers may recognise the second leg of the second stage of WCQ68 as the day that would become known as 'Red Wednesday'. Kâí struck a first-half brace to briefly leave Nephara teetering on the edge, losing out on away goals, but Rook Cathar drove in a decisive goal just before the hour. Kâí went on to complete his hat-trick, but rangy centre-half Tosca Marlowe scuffed home an ugly goal off a corner to put Nephara in the finals, one of a sheaf of Esportivan sides.

Nephara entered the World Cup with a reputation as giant-killers, and a suddenly very barren field of contenders. Nobody had them as anything more than a dark horse, but they were now a side to be taken seriously, with players representing the top leagues of the time (such as the fringe world-class striker Rook Cathar at Valhallan powerhouse East Franz Athletic, Baptism of Fire holdover Brightley at Gordonopian Basin Plain, goalkeeper Riordan at Wrexton FC of the top-ranked Apoxian league and Michael Brandon at Directus) and a core of the increasingly well-regarded Premiership, now Zenith. Nephara managed a draw with the Free Republics before securing victory over San Jose Guayabal and Cassadaigua to pass into the knockouts with flying colours, and from there to an all-action, seven-goal thriller against Valladares. Yet again, the Cormorants found a new level, but few expected them to race to a 3-0 lead by half-time. Unfortunately for the Cormorants, their lack of experience at the top level nearly cost them; Valladares roared back to life in the second half and somehow levelled the scores, and looked good value for a fourth before, against the run of play, Bittencourt played in Rook Cathar to hammer home a winner. Nephara could not triumph over Polar Islandstates, eventual bronze medallists, who beat them 1-0 in the quarterfinal, but the point had been made. Of the Esportivan cornucopia in the second round, they alone had reached the last eight, smashing a glass ceiling not only for the region, but for themselves.

They underscored that dominance with a ruthless CE10 victory, their third in five attempts, conceding just three goals in the ten matches as they beat NSI 1-0 in the final. Yet, unfathomably, a side in such high form collapsed in qualifying and failed to reach World Cup 69, the first World Cup to be held partly in Esportiva. But even when they failed, Mortlock's Cormorants still won. They picked themselves up, dragged themselves to win the Cup of Harmony and the subsequent, newly-revived Eagles' Cup, adding two unique trophies to Nephara's now-overflowing cabinet. In a Confederations Cup around that time, the Cormorants managed to get annihilated 9-3 by Osarius, beginning the two nations' largely one-sided history.

Critically, Nephara did qualify for World Cup 70 as one of the best runners-up, a nearly-flawless performance slightly bettered by a rampant RK Quebec, and faced an arguably forgiving group draw that was immediately termed the 'Group of Life'. Fittingly, all but two matches ended as draws, and crucially one was Nephara's victory over the Sarian. But Nephara were undone in the second round by Felix, despite having a Felixan political refugee, Kunibert 'Kurt' Mathias, suiting up for the Cormorants. With that, Jess Mortlock resigned after what was a deeply confusing tenure in many ways, pulling in multiple trophies and overseeing a new wave of talent. Thunder, Brightley, Harm and Thrift were all gone, but this was the era of Rutger Locke, at his peak rated a top ten player world-wide, the cult heroine Catheline Stockinger, Marlowe opposite Hadrian Belfast, who was once Player of the Season in the top-ranked Apox league as a centre-half for a relentlessly attacking Dwile Warriors, and of course holdovers like Cathar and Brandon.

Still aiming to preserve continuity, the Cormorants appointed Tess Riether, who had made her name for AFC Westpike in Brenecia before impressing as Nephara's U21 manager. There would be no ambiguity about her reign, by the end.

NEPHARAN NATIONAL TEAM SELECTION - FORTNIGHT 1
Goalkeepers: 1 - Medusa Strand (Chromatik, CMT), 12 - Toxothea Sebring (Crisisbless), 20 - Chary Longstreet (CA Paulinthal, PAS)
Defenders: 2 - Solblindi Rake (Sabrefell Moths), 3 - Radeka Lind (Jinja City FC, BNJ), 5 - Vetta Roback (Sabrefell Athletic), 6 - Anaximander Scales (Brinemouth), 17 - Kyri Levering (Northern Union, BRE), 18 - Sven Copperhead (Crisisbless), 22 - Ettard Mitteager (AFC Treason), 25 - Tanith Xu (Myana, CMT)
Midfielders: 4 - Cassander Southsea (Brinemouth), 8 - Renate March (Herzegovina City FC, BNJ), 15 - Demeter Constantine (Crisisbless), 19 - Chandra Rosziter (Dynamo Sjoedrhavn, SVJ), 23 - Kurtis Swainsona (Revolutionaries, EUR), 24 - Bellona Sebold (Crisisbless), 26 - Lindse Kvasina (Istria City FC, BNJ)
Forwards: 7 - Kestrel Anharbour (Crisisbless), 9 - Vasya Reisinger (West Cuono United, TMB), 10 - Bravura Harper (Ulsa, EUR), 11 - Arachne Loeher (Wirr Tsi, CMT), 13 - Madita Brewer (Northern Union, BRE), 14 - Konrad Balmoral (Aries Chariots), 16 - Xanthe Hauser (Crossroads, CMT), 21 - Felixe Vetiver (1830 Cathair, AUD)

[size=75]95X vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Caribbia
Ziwana vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Baggieland
UBSA vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. TJUN
Savojarna vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Elmyia
Varavel vs. Nephara
Srednjaci vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Archalit
Nephara vs. 95X
Caribbia vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Ziwana
Baggieland vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. UBSA
TJUN vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Savojarna
Elmyia vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Varavel
Srednjaci vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Archalit

by **Trolleborg** » Sun Feb 05, 2023 3:01 am

Greetings, compatriots!
It’s TTV, with a talk-show about forthcoming World Cup Qualifying. I’m Torben Riper. Our guest is none other than Torben Mortensen, chairman of our FA. By way, let me congratulate you with a round date in your life, which was two days ago, if I’m not missed something.

T.M.: Greetings, compatriots! Yes, it’s right. Thank you for your kind words. Our hockey players bring me a great gift to my birthday. Not only because they won, but also due to the fact, that from that point on, the weight on my shoulders is greatly relieved. The Football Federation is no longer the only one that has managed to win a trophy in world sports, now there will be two of us, and hopes will no longer be pinned on me alone. It is much easier to carry the load together.

T.R.: Well, I'm glad about it. And now, nevertheless, to the conversation, after all, you haven’t been to our studio for a long time. WCQ is just round the corner. So, can you get information from memory which of the opponents in the qualifying group our team lot give us we already play?

T.M.: Certainly, of course. This is Banija, Poafmersia, Brusseldorf, Magnecia and Mytanija. Each game is in my memory, I can even remember with a high degree of probability how these games developed and in what circumstances they took place. Poafmersia, semi-final in Bof-71. Our comrades in the class-71, the object of our envy a few years ago, when questions were asked whether our football is developing correctly, if there are countries that started from the same positions and managed to reach much more. And in addition, the first and last victory of our team at the penultimate World Championships was won in the game against them. Banija. The unexpected defeat of Banija in Trolleborg allowed us then - I'll tell you this secret, since almost a decade has passed - to save international football, since the question was raised of closing just opened window to the world. Why, they told us then, to participate in competitions where the result is a foregone conclusion in favor of the powerful. But over the years we ourselves managed to make it to the ranks the strong, and - unfortunately - retreat back. Brusseldorf is the name from our first CoH. We made a fuss there, and it seemed that we could even get out of the group, we needed to play with this opponent at least in a draw, but this team showed us the lesson of how the fight for the playoffs. And our teams, in general, have not yet learned how to play for the result like them. Well, Mytanija is our third playoff in the world championships. We had a few unsuccessful games in the group stage, yet we caught on to the playoffs, and in it we lost first leg at home, it almost ended in a rout, as I remember now. I broke both armrests of my chair, then cooled down, went to the stadium administration and paid the fine. Magnecia we meet at IAC-15 and won convincingly, but this is not the sign that forthcoming games will be easy. I also know Depivik, our basketball players played with them, but I won’t remember the details here.

T.R.: What can we expect from the upcoming tournament?

T.M.: To be honest, nothing good we can expect. We have a pretty tough group that has experienced tournament fighters who can deliver results and they are unlikely to lose points, and young toothy teams that will be difficult for us to cope with. In a word, the wind is contrary, the weather conditions are unfavorable, and it will take a very, very long time to work at least until some success in the qualifying tournaments.

T.R.: Yet why do we enter the tenth year with such a pessimistic mood?

T.M.: You know, if you look at many other teams in the world, few people manage to win three tournaments in ten years, get to the tournament finals four times and qualify for the World Cup three times. Such teams exists, but they can be counted on the fingers of one hand. Most of teams who spend ten years in the world football, usually come down and give up the fight. And luck hasn't smiled on us several times in a row. Judging strictly by the rating tables, in fact, in three years we have lost seven years of work, and I do not relieve myself of responsibility for the result. But miracles are hard to do. Our national leader, yes, give impression that he can. But even then, with his experience, it took four seasons for some results that brought satisfaction to the broad masses of fans, and the latest success was clearly ahead of its time. On our current position, we must prepare to the uphill battle.

T.R.: And what is the root of the problems?

T.M.: Just a long isolation from the outside world and later discovering that we look very good if compared to other countries of the world and the region formed a specific - and incorrect - idea of how everything in the world should be arranged, that everything should be - due the greatness of our country - fold in our favor, as if by magic. Meanwhile, the football team is still performing very well compared to the difficult debuts of teams in other sports. Remember the catastrophes of hockey and basketball players of the first years, although the fans clearly counted on a repetition of football successes. And we are still looking for our own, the right way, and there may be several different ones.

T.R.: Okay, this is more or less clear. Can you tell me something about the practice of hosting international tournaments? How long this was discussed, and now we can discuss the results.

T.M.: I find - don't take it as a provocation - that we don't need it.

T.R.: Yes?

T.M.: Yes. I think that hosting tournaments doesn't pay off in terms of the balance of the emotions you put in and the emotions you get back, and that's the most important thing. In practice, it turned out that we have the infrastructure, but are not mentally prepared. Already on the first trials, when we applied for individual matches in various tournaments, it was clear that we were doing something wrong. And now I am fully observing that the direction of preparing tournaments that we have chosen is not very much in demand. I believe that we in the football federation will not apply for independent holding of major tournaments in the coming years. Maybe something small to look at various solutions to the problems noticed.

T.R.: And our national leader supports this line?

T.M.: Fully. We need right now to focus on other things, we have a clear idea of which ones.

T.R.: Is there anything that will be an innovation for football fans? You think for a while, and we will interrupt the newsreel.

by **Ko-oren** » Sun Feb 05, 2023 4:46 am

Through a surprise cancellation by Squidroidia, the Dragonflies maintained their streak of Pot 1 spots in qualifiers. Depending on who you get from the draw, that can be a huge difference: either land in a group with Valanora, Banija, or Turori, or get Adab, Milchama, or Saint Eleanor - the highs and lows of pot 1 and 2, respectively. KPB-wise, Ko-oren is a lot closer to the latter than to the former. How different it all was two cycles ago, when the Dragonflies became the latest addition to the list of World Cup winners and people expected us to hang around the top of the rankings for a while. A quarterfinal, group stage exit, and another round of 16 loss later, Ko-oren are back home: the mid 10s in KPB and number one on most people's lists of 'who not to draw'. Are the Dragonflies good? Bad? Graceful losers? Graceful winners? Is the tactical outlook on the game relevant? Or completely outdated? Questions that can all be answered with 'yeah, a little' much like at any point in the last 30 cycles.

The Ko-orenite national team is still good, as evidenced by 10 straight World Cup appearances, which is getting up there with the best in the business. The team is also not what it was - or could have been - seeing as some teams manage to play a final and still be a contender three cycles later. Graceful losers or winners - in the past, sure, but more recently, we haven't been the best guests that we can be. You're always ensured of professionals and low fouling XIs that nonetheless will find and exploit anything as long as it doesn't hurt anyone (physically). A relevant outlook on the game? Sure, nobody wants to play us, so we must be doing something right and well enough. Outdated? More and more teams are shifting to the defensive side of the game, and Davenport has developed the a defensive 5-3-2 into a more versatile 5-4-1, so we might actually be ahead of the curve in playing more attractive football. Zig when everyone zags, folks.

We're in the last few cycles before the big generation retires. The ones who were stars in 87 and veterans in 89. Who played AOCAFs and CAFAs. Think of Van Schelven and Mizuno, who were young and inexperienced at the start of that run. Think of Theshendan, who was already getting on in age at the start of it and is currently contemplating retirement with Gehrenna FC. Think of Longchambon, the crown prince of Ko-orenite football as the creative brain of the team and still got overlooked by the international crowd - you can't be creative and Ko-orenite, duh. In their places there's a new crew: Mallerbury, Mulvahil, Entatingun, Aomelirea, and Archer. And the generation behind them is also starting to gain traction: Kaji, Uozomi, Laza. The middle generation has known nothing but success and have earned transfers to other places in the multiverse far earlier than the previous generation. They're the model professionals, high earners, and very tactically aware. The young generation have grown up with structured football academies and a relevant Top League, and might not feel the same need to escape to greener pastures.

In our group: the Quebecois - more than just the Salamantic Supercup (and Maethoru SC-Montreal Koreana invitational, most years) opponents. The Ochre Islands and Euran Oceanian Territories from the CAFA. There's Yakk, for the third cycle in a row. There's Geektopia, the first ever team to lose to Ko-oren in a World Cup Round of 16. And Sharktail, Fort McKinley, Naixi, Illiryja, the CONGOlese Republic, and the Harry Islands. Some might ring a bell, others are just starting out with Baptism of Fire hype, some are complete blank slates.

Among the fifteen groups, ours ranks 12th in overall KPB. Now, with the huge range of KPB in pot 1, having a good pot 1 nation correlates heavily with highest total group KPB, but still. The toughest group, by this metric, is the one with Valanora, Pasarga, and Flavovespia (and other Anaians Estorvipa and Estorpiva. Second are Turori, Baker Park, Tikariot, and Krytenia. Third are Zwangzug and Cassadaigua with a long list of Cup of Harmony contenders. Dead last, then, are the Squornshelan Remnant States with Audioslavia and Valentine Z, with more famous names of old - Astograth, Equestria. Coming into the qualifiers with a lot of hype are Naixi (our own group 2), Cardenao (group 9, hoping to upset Mertagne, Saint Eleanor, and the Holy Empire - hands off of our Anaians), Delte (behind Vilita and Brenecia), West Barack and East Obama (group 12, who are in the middle years between BoF heroes and WC qualifiers), and Tikariot (group 13, behind Baker Park and Turori). Kirungabi and Cabo Azure have also been tipped to make a run, with some optimism around Gnejs, Eshialand, and Sylestone as well.

Think you know better? Enter our Fantasy Game and pick who you think will surprise friend and foe!

by **Zwangzug** » Sun Feb 05, 2023 12:58 pm

Nine cycles ago, Lunar Lexicon brought the world Kairothletes, the card game of time travel and alternate history. Linchpins were flipped, paradoxes were patched, travelers from various timelines made it home (or didn't), and then we left town and gave up on it.

But time, in most systems of measurement, marches on, and there's been lots more history made since then--to say nothing of all the other possible characters you could imagine causing havoc in the original timeline. So we're due for some expansions! This iteration of the game will feature characters drawn from the Reserve XIII and the Elsewhen Eighties mini-expansions. All the normal rules and FAQ apply.

We've dealt out our eight time travellers, and five cards from the deck. Our opening hand consists of one generic "Reverse Fate" inverter, and four different patches that can be played to fix the paradoxes that ensue in the timeline. Let's look closely to see which of them we'll need, and which, if any, can be safely discarded.

As it happens, three of these patches are ones we won't need: WC18 (Druidans all change their names to Andrew), WC37L (Demot win semifinal in extra time), and WC79 (another robotics lab opens at the AIU). We do, however, need WC34L (Milchama fans blame "goat curse" for continuing mediocrity) for Hannah's timeline. Once again, "E" or "L" just mean "early" or "late" in the cycle when there are two unrelated events happening around the same time, a lot of our choices for "interesting" history were clumped up around each other. So let's go ahead and discard the unneeded cards and draw three more!

We got two more "Reverse Fate" cards--these are the most powerful type of Inverter because they can be played on any linchpin--and a special "Fix the Match" inverter, which only applies to certain events. Since we now have only one patch in our hand, we'll try to work on Hannah's timeline first. To mess with the Milchama syncretists, we need to travel all the way back to World Cup 14, which is approximately when Margaret of Snub Nose 38 began sacrificing rubber chickens to the random number gods. Using a Reverse Fate card there, we flip it to the alternate WC14', in which Snub Nose 38 converts to Eastern Orthodoxy instead. This creates a paradox in WC34, when the Milchama fans would have been sacrificing to Margaret. (It also affects WC18, when Druida begins its Margaretization program, but that one isn't paradoxed yet because it hinges on a second linchpin.)

Now we can immediately play the patch onto WC34L; instead of sacrificing to Margaret, the Milchama fans will just complain about a goat instead, and the paradox is resolved. Stay tuned throughout the campaign as the adventures continue!

by **Flavovespia** » Sun Feb 05, 2023 2:09 pm

Returning for a second edition, This is Flavovespia is a set of written documentaries that focus on aspects of life in Flavovespia. Previously, each of the 10 regions that made up the nation were looked at, with a brief overview of the transport, economy, and politics of each region. In this edition, there’ll be a focus on the cultural aspects of the nation, along with a few other topics of interest.

To begin with, the first topic of interest is politics. Practically every nation in some way shape or form is influenced in some ways by politics, and Flavovespia is no exception. The Flavovespian Parliament is a unicameral body comprising of 500 members. The President, who is chosen as the Member who can command a majority in the Parliament, functions as the head of government and head of state. The 500 members are selected using a hybrid system that’s mostly proportional. 76 are selected in an alternative vote election in each municipality (1 per municipality), and then 424 are selected using the D’Hondt system on the 10 regions, each region allocated seats based on population. An optional member selection system on the list vote gives parties some, but not influence on the party list vote.

Since the dawn of the Union of Greater Waldster, 140 years ago in 100BU, the first quasi-national Parliament of what is now Flavovespia, the nation has largely been considered a majority three party system, with a left wing, a centrist, and a right wing faction. Of course, being a proportional system, splits and subfactions have often occurred in these 3 branches, some of which are still ongoing. Furthermore, it can be argued some parties don’t fit the system, yet have wielded significant influence. Part 1 of the discussion on Politics, introduces the parties in the current Flavovespian Parliament, prior to the 40AU Election.

Socialist Party

Current Leader: Umar Uddin
Famous Past Leaders: Alan Lawson, Gary Beale, Ernest Featherstone
Predecessor Parties: None
Number of Seats at Last Election: 177/500

The current party in power, and the longest existing party in the history of Flavovespia, the Socialist Party has existed since the dawn of the Union of Greater Waldster. It even predates that, with the Socialist movement instrumental in bringing around democratic reforms in the decades prior to 100BU, leading to the first Parliament with a universal suffrage. Ernest Featherstone is widely regarded as the first leader of the party officially, having been appointed to lead the Socialist faction in the first election after the signing of the Waldster Agreement, and thus becoming the first First Minister, a role that was the predecessor to the modern day Presidency. Whilst the party has had its ups and downs, it has always been the leading force of the left-wing faction in Flavovespia.

The Socialist Party has been a broad tent of left-wing ideas, and has generally remained fairly stable over the years, resistant to being broken apart by warring sides for the most part. Its resilience has arguably been its weakness on a few occasions. Although the predominant left-wing party, the Socialist Party can be stubborn at times, more so on social than economic issues, and has a strong centralisation focus. Gary Beale’s reform of the Union of Greater Waldster to the Confederation of Cities of Greater Waldster (CCGW), in 24BU not long after his election victory, lead to several cities leaving the CCGW, and almost 2 decades of political division on the island. It would later take one of the best politicians, Alan Lawson, who even commands a fair of respect from right-wing sources, to eventually reunite the political landscape of the island, forming the modern day Republic of Greater Waldster. Socialists were also originally resistant to the changes to the proposed constitutional changes and national name change in the 10sAU decade, although eventually acquiesced and in 19AU accepted the change to the Republic of Flavovespia.

The Socialists have governed as the senior coalition partner with Flavovespia Forward since 28AU. Alexander Mason lead for 2 cycles, but with his personal polling and key allies in the parties looking weak going in the 36AU election, the party chose a new leader for then. Umar Uddin, despite limited senior Ministry experience, was a charismatic and visionary leader and won the parties election. In the 36AU election, he won 177 seats, the most of any Socialist leader since Alan Lawson some 32 years previously. Nevertheless, it was a protracted coalition dealing, before once again, the Socialists would lead a coalition with Flavovespia Forward as the junior partner.

Flavovespia Forward

Current Leader: Padraic Kelly
Famous Past Leaders: Scarlett Williamson
Predecessor Parties: Liberty, Centre Party
Number of Seats at Last Election: 118/500

Flavovespia Forward represent the centrist faction of Flavovespian politics. In the past, the direct predecessor was Liberty, and before that, the indirect successor was the Centre Party. The party was founded during the peak of the constitutional reform drama of the 10sAU decade. Liberty, already weakened in the previous decades by the rise of the Greens who took plenty of their voters, were seem as too wishy-washy and indecisive on the growing discontent around constitutional reform in Flavovespia. A proponent of more direct democracy and soft support for local issues, Liberty were in crisis by the first 17AU election.

Along came Scarlett Williamson. Elected as leader on a bold manifesto, she first reformed the whole party, taking the name Flavovespia Forward. With a firm commitment to changing the national name, but also a manifesto that was seen to balance the powers of national government with local interests, they rose back to 101 seats, the second highest in the second election of 17AU. Then, exploiting the stubbornness of Blair Hockman and the Socialists, and the contempt for radical right-wing Lazaro Greban from just about every other party, she became President, backed by the Democratic Conservatives and Greens, and put the constitutional reforms to a national referendum. With Socialists eventual acceptance once it became clear it’d win, the changes passed, and in 19AU, the Republic of Greater Waldster became the Republic of Flavovespia.

Since then, Flavovespia Forward have had mixed fortunes, depending on how things are considered. They held the Presidency as senior coalition partner to 24AU, but since then, have always been a junior coalition partner. At their core, despite being in the centre, they can often be the first to push social and constitutional change, hence sometimes nicknamed “radical centrists”. On economic matters, they sit between the Socialists and Democratic Conservatives, but tend to be more free trade than either of those. They’re sat nicely to always play a part in government negotiations, especially with recent Green weakness, but are also perceived as a bit too focused on winning local and regional elections over national elections, and in recent times have struggled to keep a unified front between branches. Padraic Kelly was elected leader in 32AU, and despite some criticism for an opportunistic attempt to try and become President via a broad church coalition in 36AU, has a second shot now at leading the party into an election.

Democratic Conservatives

Current Leader: Linda Thomas
Famous Past Leaders: Sydney Prewer, Stephen Collier, Daniel Cohen
Predecessor Parties: Conservative Party
Number of Seats at Last Election: 58/500

The Democratic Conservative Party represents the right-wing faction on paper, although since the 36AU election, the right-wing of Flavovespian politics has again become divided. The party itself began in a split in 23BU in the original Conservative Party anyway. The schism caused by the CCGW generally, saw the Democratic Conservatives back “reform from within”, wanting a unified national government, whereas Independent Conservatives backed the city states, wanting a much more scaled back union across the island. Daniel Cohen would manage to get 2 terms as First Minister in the CCGW, from 20BU-16BU, and 11BU-7BU. His amicable relationship with Alan Lawson has often been cited as a reason that a period of political turmoil came to an end, despite policy differences, he was often seen one of the strongest statesman and politicians in the nation.

In a nation that is generally left of centre, it’s not a surprise the Democratic Conservatives have struggled to form governments. A combination of being right-wing economically, mixed on social issues, but also generally favouring a one nation approach over a more independent approach for regions and cities has caused divisions and strife on the right. Christine Hills’ leadership during the constitutional reform era did take the Democratic Conservatives to their lowest vote and seat share for a long time, in part due to the radical right-wing populism of Lazaro Greban. Nevertheless, Hills set in motion the conditions to enter coalition with Flavovespia Forward. Steven Collier succeeded her as leader, improved their seat tally in 21AU, then when the unstable coalition with Flavovespia Forward fell in 24AU, Collier managed to negotiate a deal to become President, with the backing of Flavovespia Forward, to the surprise of a fair few. Whilst only a one term President thanks to the Socialist surge in the next election, he has become the most successful Democratic Conservative since Daniel Cohen.

Unfortunately for the Democratic Conservatives, it all fell apart after 32AU. Steven Collier announced after over a decade as leader, he would stand down. Sydney Prewer came to the fore, and pushed a manifesto that seemed keen on local empowerment, combined with a more right-wing economic and social outlook. This caused much friction in the party, MP’s and members alike. Prewer narrowly survived a leadership challenge, but arguably in vain, as a breakaway group founded the Modern Republicans (or ModReps as they became known as). At a similar time, the Freedom and Democracy Party ejected its own founded, Lazaro Greban, who promptly founded The Lazaro List for the next election, thus the right-wing faction arguably had 4 moderately sized parties to vote for, depending on the definition of right-wing. Unsurprisingly, the Democratic Conservatives plunged in vote total, winning just 58. They did nearly end up in government anyway, with a Flavovespia Forward lead government, but too much tension between the varying right-wing parties, as well as the general Parlimentary arithmetic prevented that. Linda Thomas now leads the Democratic Conservatives, but leads a party that is struggling to carve out a clear identity and strong base amongst a crowded field.

Part 2 will focus on the other parties currently in the Flavovespian Parliament, and the influence they’ve played in Flavovespian politics.

by **Delte** » Sun Feb 05, 2023 11:00 pm

THE QUICK & THE DELTS (Season 2)
1/6 : Previously On The Quick & The Delts, Season 1

Oswark station, platform three, just after Cup of Harmony 83, where Professor Polestar greets one of her pupils: “My my, young Tasher”, she said to Onun Tasher, her talented sixth-former who was with the travelling party as first choice attacking midfielder, “haven’t you grown up!”

“Reckon we all have, Professor Polestar,” said her PE teacher Mr. Clentin, the team coach, “It’s been an adventure, for sure, but do you know, I am exhausted. It’s a good job it’s half term!”

Cut to the Tasher household, where two little brothers were fighting over some World Cup memorabilia: “Funny,” observed Orlo, the brighter of the two youngsters, “in the programmes and team sheets, it makes them two years older in the Cup of Harmony than it does in the Baptism of Fire.”

“That’s stupid” said Nacka, pretending to be clever, “the Baptism was only a couple of months ago. Anyway, look at this Sarzonia shirt!”

Cut to the town planning office: “But we only just crowned Græntfjall,” exclaimed Eremo, on the phone.

“The point is,” said Tessa Sack, Chief of Everything, with a very un-Stoic-like impatience in her telephone voice, “we are fairly sure the World Cup happens every two to four months, not every two to four years as we had first expected.”

Cut to an emergency player meeting called by Dr. Orem Ustingham: “It’s not the Mertipox,” he explained, “but we definitely picked up something unpleasant in the spring. I took a slice of armbone, see, and just counted the rings,” said the Doc, holding a disc of bone up to the light, “three more than there should be.

“Thanks to our volunteers,” continued the Doc, “I have been able confirm, beyond a reasonable doubt, that outside the valley, time is moving a lot faster. If we go out there, we age quicker. Out there they are living on quicktime.”

“I did wonder about their squeaky voices,” observed Aleard Sullenden, the brewer and midfielder.

Cut to Emel Radogar, landlord of the Six of Staves public house in Oswark, holding forth on his Revised History of the World Cup.

“Turns out,” he told Pop Tasher and the other rapt bar flies at The Staves, “they only invented it twenty years ago. I mean really, when you think about it, three hundred years of alleged football and all that stuff about dice and Dreamed Realms and The Holy Asylum and security elves and whatnot, and that Starblaydi chap with all them tattoos, it had to be a load of nonsense, didn’t it?”

Cut to a council meeting at the Delte River Trust, the de facto government of the valleys: “We should only select teenagers,” said Morho Bellish, assistant coach of The Representatives and PE teacher of Oswark Vocational High School, “all they want to do is grow up before their time, and dog knows most of them could do with a boost of maturity.”

“More funding for medical research,” suggested Doc Orem, the national team winger and medical adviser.

Cut to Issenda Tenning, head of the All-Week Super Ultra Premier Football Association (‘The FA’) announcing a new plan to limit premature ageing out in the world: “We select a new tavelling Away Team for each World Cup, so no-one goes outside the valley for more than one month.”

“But at that rate,” said Coach Clentin, a very pragmatic sort of stoic, “we’ll have run out of useful footballers for away teams by about the end of 2022. What’ll we do for World Cups after that?”

Fade to black. Roll shiny new Season 2 title sequence.

by **Yakk** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 12:03 am

YAK EMPIRE MEDIA PREDICTS QUALIFIERS

With a return to the qualifying stage of the world cup for cycle 93 Yak Empire citizens have been overtaken with football fever. Not just the fans in the stands but the people who write about have also gotten the football fever. Many in fact, put in what they predict will be the results to group two of Cycle 93 of the World cup. Their Predictions are listed below. Four of the Empires top sports writers from the top-four most well known papers in the Yak Empire have put forth submissions. Here is what they had to say

Nyorun Tsaatmangur
Ashangabat Daily Paper

1.) Ko-oren (17)
2.) Independent Athletes from Quebec (18)
3.) Euran Oceania Territories (98)
4.) Sharktail (78)
5.) Geektopia (44)
6.) Naixi (191)
7.) Yakk (143)
8.) Ochre Islands (72)
9.) Illiryja (205)
10.) Harry Islands (UR)
11.) Fort McKinley (132)
12.) CONGOlese republic (239)

Nyorun goes with Ko-Oren and Quebec as the two big winners. He also said he likes Euran Oceania Territories as they have to be "At least 75% as good as the real Eura". Though we're not for sure certain if this is because he doesn't know the EOT is part of Eura asa whole or this is just a poor translation of what he said into english.

Oyat Sitaag
Alangabaat Newswire

1.) Ko-oren (17)
2.) Independent Athletes from Quebec (18)
3.) Ochre Islands (72)
4.) Sharktail (78)
5.) Euran Oceania Territories (98)
6.) Geektopia (44)
7.) Yakk (143)
8.) Fort McKinley (132)
9.) Naixi (191)
10.) Harry Islands (UR)
11.) Illiryja (205)
12.) CONGOlese republic (239)

Oyat is the veteran of the four reporters we inquired for this survey, and at 54 years old he's seen as the dean of sports writing in the Yak Empire. He also predicted a Ko-Oren / IAQ 1-2 finish and said this should be a no brainer give how much further ahead of the pack they are than a Geektopia or an Ochre Islands type nation. Unlike Tsaatmangur though, he seems to be more positive about Ochre Islands.

Jusef Jozvek
Qasmanbashi Daily Times

1.) Independent Athletes from Quebec (18)
2.) Ko-oren (17)
3.) Sharktail (78)
4.) Geektopia (44)
5.) Yakk (143)
6.) Euran Oceania Territories (98)
7.) Naixi (191)
8.) Ochre Islands (72)
9.) Harry Islands (UR)
10.) Fort McKinley (132)
11.) CONGOlese republic (239)
12.) Illiryja (205)

Mwanwhile in Qasmanbashi, Mr. Jozvek has picked Quebec to win. When asked why he said "I think Yakk will draw or defeat Ko-Oren. We played them before so we should be more prepaired." He also predicted Yak to finish 5th. Highest of the 4 writers we surveyed.

Chi Piang
Lahskan Daily

1.) Ko-oren (17)
2.) Ochre Islands (72)
3.) Independent Athletes from Quebec (18)
4.) Euran Oceania Territories (98)
5.) Geektopia (44)
6.) Naixi (191)
7.) Yakk (143)
8.) Sharktail (78)
9.) Harry Islands (UR)
10.) Illiryja (205)
11.) Fort McKinley (132)
12.) CONGOlese republic (239)

Piang another veteran sports writer has stated something interesting. He Thinks Ochre Islands are a sneaky good team and might surprise a few people. He also put a note in saying 5-7 is a crapshoot and that there is a huge gap between the 8 and 9th place teams in the group. He also stated He thinks Yakk will be in the mid teir and could get as high as 4th place if the right things happen.

STADIUM ASSIGNMENTS

STADIUM: Imperial Stadium of Yak
PIC: Picture
TENENT: Yak Empire National Team / Alangabat City
LOCATION: Alangabat
CAPACITY: 35,000
OPPONENTS: Ko-oren (17) / Euran Oceania Territories (98) / Sharktail (78)

STADIUM: Riverside Stadium*
PIC: Picture
TENENT: Qasmanbashi Turkic FC
LOCATION: Qasmanbashi
CAPACITY: 25,000
OPPONENT: Geektopia (44) / Independent Athletes from Quebec (18) / Harry Islands (UR)

STADIUM: Nijan Stadium
PIC: Picture
TENENT: Lashkan Dragonsport SC
LOCATION: Lashkan
CAPACITY: 27,500
OPPONENT: Naixi (191) / Ochre Islands (72)

STADIUM: Plateau Sporting Complex*
PIC: Picture
TENENT: Ijiang Plateau Sport
LOCATION: Ijiang
CAPACITY: 10,000
OPPONENT: Fort McKinley (132) / Illiryja (205)

STADIUM: Yorgon Baraat Stadium
PIC: Picture
TENENT: Horseriders Club
LOCATION: Alangabat
CAPACITY: 8,000
OPPONENT: CONGOlese republic (239)

*English Translation

by **PotatoFarmers** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 12:54 am

Sporting Daily
OptaPoaf "breaks" fantasy game after figuring out code to generate 240 solution
Fiskadaha - OptaPoaf has issued a statement indicating that their intern may have "broken" the Ko-orenite fantasy game after figuring out how to generate a whole list of submissions which maximises the KPB budget for the tournament.

In the biennial competition featuring submissions from various nations, OptaPoaf, the statistical analysis company who now manages the Poafmersian WCQ microsite, had their entry "questioned" by fellow participants after submitting an entry involving 15 teams that exactly utilises the 240 KPB budget for fantasy submissions. OptaPoaf was chosen to be this year's representative after talks between Poafmersian newspapers and the Football Association, with the newspapers electing to focus more about the various events held concurrently in the multiverse and not spend effort speculating on which set of teams would be valuable in the fantasy race. Poafmersia is the defending champions from last cycle, with an entry that features 584 fantasy points, using a budget of 199.63 KPB (the limit was 200 in the last edition).

Insiders from within OptaPoaf said that the entry was decided after reviewing an intern's list of 240 entries, and the analysis team felt that this was one of the best 240 entries out there. Though they refused to mention how they obtained this list of 240 entries, they said an intern "accidentally" found it after "experimenting" with a program that was spitting out optimal fantasy entries at the conclusion of a fantasy round. The statement released by OptaPoaf seems to be similiar to what was mentioned by the insiders, stating that "we declare that we utilised algorithmic assistance in deciding our submission for the competition". OptaPoaf said that this public statement was also a clarification on the 240 entries, and that there is actually "multiple" 240 entries possible for the competition. "We also weighed against all our close-to-240 entries as part of our decision making, and the decision making was done by a human and not a robot," the statement read.

OptaPoaf also mentioned that they wanted to make additional "non-cometitive" submissions to the competition, stating that these submissions would provide more diversity to the list of entries as provided for the competition. "We are seeking the organisers' approval for this, and we will hold back from making such submissions for now." However, it was reported by other sources that OptaPoaf was actually behind another "mysterious" submission, which features also 240 points as budget and has an unusually high standard deviation score. This was neither confirmed nor denied by OptaPoaf when they were contacted by the Daily about the issue. "We are happy to release some of the 240 solutions our algorithm actually provides, however, we would not be willing to share the program itself given that this is part of our intellectual property," said the spokesman.

OptaPoaf's provided solutions are found in the link (OOC: Spoiler) below. OptaPoaf has indicated clearly that they are not responsible for the results obained from using such solutions.

Group 1: Srubnaya Culture (1.58 KPB)
Group 2: Fort McKinley (5.29 KPB)
Group 3: Sendhang (17.4 KPB)
Group 4: Sargossa (12.09 KPB)
Group 5: Ceni (14.01 KPB)
Group 6: Nephara (32.7 KPB)
Group 7: Eshialand (12.54 KPB)
Group 8: Eura (25.56 KPB)
Group 9: Saint Eleanor (23.41 KPB)
Group 10: Oberour Ar Moro (12.97 KPB)
Group 11: Brenecia (29.38 KPB)
Group 12: Trolleborg (14.61 KPB)
Group 13: República Guanacasteca (10.11 KPB)
Group 14: Milchama (23.72 KPB)
Group 15: Sannyamathland (4.63 KPB)

Group 1: Drawkland (28.13 KPB)
Group 2: CONGOlese republic (0.75 KPB)
Group 3: Polkopia (7.17 KPB)
Group 4: Farfadillis (32.23 KPB)
Group 5: Kirungabi (2.33 KPB)
Group 6: Nephara (32.7 KPB)
Group 7: Boring Paradise (3.6 KPB)
Group 8: Eura (25.56 KPB)
Group 9: Darmen (11.63 KPB)
Group 10: Saperetia (1.33 KPB)
Group 11: Bears Armed (5.14 KPB)
Group 12: Banija (45.53 KPB)
Group 13: Tikariot (21.81 KPB)
Group 14: Xanneria (6.98 KPB)
Group 15: Eraman (15.11 KPB)

Group 1: Brookstation (14.8 KPB)
Group 2: Ochre Islands (12.21 KPB)
Group 3: British Covelandia (0.75 KPB)
Group 4: Bubiyan and Warbah (0.25 KPB)
Group 5: Yuezhou (19.64 KPB)
Group 6: Baggieland (12.43 KPB)
Group 7: Valentine Z (16.53 KPB)
Group 8: Jeruselem (18.39 KPB)
Group 9: Saint Eleanor (23.41 KPB)
Group 10: Oberour Ar Moro (12.97 KPB)
Group 11: Brenecia (29.38 KPB)
Group 12: The Karodin Tetrarchy (6.23 KPB)
Group 13: Commonwealth of Baker Park (27.56 KPB)
Group 14: Savigliane (30.34 KPB)
Group 15: Eraman (15.11 KPB)

Group 1: Saterun (7.48 KPB)
Group 2: Ko-oren (30.27 KPB)
Group 3: Sendhang (17.4 KPB)
Group 4: Sudilia (4.19 KPB)
Group 5: Ceni (14.01 KPB)
Group 6: Nephara (32.7 KPB)
Group 7: Ryfenia (0.25 KPB)
Group 8: Tjorl (10.34 KPB)
Group 9: The Holy Empire (30.63 KPB)
Group 10: Valanora (51.01 KPB)
Group 11: Brenecia (29.38 KPB)
Group 12: Depivik (0.58 KPB)
Group 13: Strayan Rus (1 KPB)
Group 14: Gortolekua (9.34 KPB)
Group 15: Greater Kamilistan (1.42 KPB)

Group 1: The Licentian Isles (10.03 KPB)
Group 2: Ochre Islands (12.21 KPB)
Group 3: Tanirinthia (1.25 KPB)
Group 4: Farfadillis (32.23 KPB)
Group 5: Adab (22.41 KPB)
Group 6: Elmyia (6.2 KPB)
Group 7: Aeragny (1.83 KPB)
Group 8: Quakmybush (5.84 KPB)
Group 9: The Holy Empire (30.63 KPB)
Group 10: Valanora (51.01 KPB)
Group 11: Pluvia and the Saxean Isles (10.39 KPB)
Group 12: The Karodin Tetrarchy (6.23 KPB)
Group 13: Montaña Verde (6.74 KPB)
Group 14: Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom (14.95 KPB)
Group 15: Cassadaigua (28.05 KPB)

by **Pemecutan** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 4:23 am

Soma Paing Wuku Merakih, Pawukon 1784

World Cup Campaign of Doubt

Tegeh Kori - The largest football competition in the multiverse is about to start. And as usual, it is started with qualifying stage. While Tegeh Kori National Stadium is prepared for the home match, which happening on the third match, the team is ready to fly to their first match against Millenhaal. As the PFA President, Putu Ayu Kusumawardani bid farewell to the departed team, fans are questioning about the team's campaign in the competition.

The team was giving their best result so far in Eagle's Cup. The team won bronze medal in the XV edition, their third participation in the competition. The result gives a warm breeze to the supporters as the team entering the regional competition. But to their shocked, Pemecutan was defeated in quarterfinal of 12th Mandalanusa Cup. And the team that defeated them was Soracana Islands who was just made a comeback to the world of sport. The result was the worst result for Pemecutan in their regional participation history. And the absent of Soracanian players in Pemecutanian squad was highlighted.

It is a widely known that after the failed in Soracana, the country was taken under Pemecutan wing. Pemecutan took control of Soracana's defense and international affairs, including their sports participation in international stage. Pemecutan then allowed Soracanian athletes to play internationally under Pemecutan name and flag. This also happening in the national football team. Name such as Aksabala Jandisuga, Yuhabani Nehusandak and others are Soracanian natives. And together they have achieved a lot. The most notable of course World Cup qualification. Pemecutan become the first country in their region to qualified for World Cup. They managed to retain their position in the World top 10. But their quarterfinal exit at the latest Mandalanusa Cup with all-Pemecutan players raise concern about the influence of Soracanian players in the squad.

Based on both countries agreement, Soracanian players only able to play under Pemecutan name and flag if Soracana do not enter the said competition. In the latest Mandalanusa Cup, Soracana made a comeback by entering the competition for the first time after 6 years hiatus. Pemecutan then enter the competition without a single Soracanian players in their squad. We already saw the result. The worst result for the country. Does it have to do with the absent of Soracanian players? Do Pemecutan rely too much to Soracanian players?

Sport enthusiast, Nyoman Ngakan Parwata said that Soracanian players have experience a lot of Pemecutan way of play, tactics and strategies that they left a little space for surprise when both team face each other. Pemecutan did control the match. They had a better possession. Numerous chances but failed to scored. With their knowledge of Pemecutan playing style, Rustijana Sambaul, Soracana's national team manager, likely already produce a strategy to counter Pemecutan playing style. And the result, they were success to win. Parwata reminded Pramana, Pemecutan manager to create a new strategy if ever both teams face each other again. He also noted Pramana's several formation change. The previous manager, Agung Suryanantha always use 4-3-3 formation. After taking the manager position, Surya Agung Pramana use the same formation as it's already stuck with the squad. Only recently he made a few changes. 5-3-2 and 4-4-2 formations are sometimes use.

Now in the qualifying round of World Cup 93, we see Manager Pramana is stick with his all-Pemecutan squad. No Soracanian players are in sight. The rumour said that Pramana wants to slowly not using Soracanian players again in the squad especially as Soracania have comeback to the world of sport. But will his plan become a success? We'll see.

by **Jeruselem** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 5:27 am

Princess Stella (pregnant, naked) and Princess Mila (naked) for Naked News Jeruselem at the studio

Stella: HEY, this is Princess Stella for Naked News Jeruselem and we're back on campaign in the World Cup again. World Cup 93 is here and I'm with my younger sister Mila! Due to a common medical condition for women, I will not be on the road with the team but my sister Mila will be taking over for me instead.
Mila: I'm not as obnoxious and annoying as my sister here
Stella: She's more like her Dad, I'm more a copy of Mum
Mila: That's pretty normal for our family ...
Stella: OK, World Cup 93 is here and we have to look at what or who or whatever we're up against. Each group has like 12 teams. There's actually 15 groups but we're not going discuss the other 14 because ... it's kinda of a pointless exercise.
Mila: World Cup 93 does have 180 participants and we're just one of them. Yes 15 times 12 does equal 180.

Stella: The hosts for this cup are Chromatika and Tumbra, who we have encountered before. But since they are the hosts ... they don't need to qualify because hosts automatically qualify.
Mila: Which leaves 180 teams to battle for the remaining 30 spots
Stella: And we didn't manage to get one of those last world cup ...
Mila: But this is a new world cup, so we're back to see if we can qualify
Stella: We got placed in Group 8 with 11 other teams, some of which are familiar faces
Mila: And some we have no idea about

Stella: The top dog in group 8 is Kandorith, ranked number 10. Obviously, great things are expected from Kandorith.
Mila: They are only top 10 team in this group.
Stella: Next up is Eura, ranked 28. Another team expected to compete for qualification, you can't write them off.
Mila: For sure, they will be one of benchmarks on this group.
Stella: 3rd ranked seed is ... Jeruselem, ranked ... 42. Eh, the meaning of life?
Mila: I wonder if someone is trolling us ranking us 42. Nevermind.

Stella: So the top three seeds are Kandorith, Eura, and Jeruselem. Also, we have the The Cordian Isles ranked 53. I don't think we've run into them.
Mila: I guess ranked 53, they are a threat and maybe a rising threat.
Stella: Still in the top 100, we have Tjorl ranked 81. Another one of those teams we know little about but they are here and any team can pose a threat.
Mila: I have no idea how to say that word, err Tjorl ...
Stella: Neither do I, I just say it with Swedish accdent ...
Mila: I guess it might be Swedish ...

Stella: In the top 100, just ... is New Gelderland ranked 99. I think we've played them before ... somewhere.
Mila: At least I can say New Gelderland ...
Stella: Hey look, it's our friends Quakmybush, but ranked 129. Well, their glory days are past them.
Mila: Didn't they used to be ranked a lot higher
Stella: I guess they've fallen on hard times
Mila: Maybe it's a new dawn for Quakmybush, or just a false one.

Stella: And it's Bongo Johnson again! Ranked even lower at 158. Puzzling name but we can spell it without Google.
Mila: I once knew someone named Bongo Johnson
Stella: Who names their kids, Bongo?
Mila: No idea
Stella: Well, not many teams left to mention. Ranked 170, we have ... route, no sorry ... Rouyoute
Mila: Route route with a Y in the middle?

Stella: Something like that, that one confused my spell checker.
Mila: We're getting past the 200s now and we have Osarius ranked 213. No idea who they are.
Stella: That happens when you start getting to the teams near unranked.
Mila: Speaking of unranked, there's Sylestone.
Stella: Ranked 265 is least but not last, Gran Saguaro. I suspect they are rather new team from last cup.
Mila: We gots nothing on them either.

Stella: That's all 12 teams in Group 8. Yes the ones near the bottom are like, we gots no idea except for Quakmybush.
Mila: But at the top, familiar faces.
Stella: All in all, we can't complain too much about our group. Considering, only 3 of 12 are top 50, hey ... that's fine. Yeah one is us
Mila: I still can't believe we managed to rank, 42.
Stella: Helped if we qualified more regularly
Mila: This year we got a new manager, Faye Swift, no relation to Taylor Swift.

Stella: And please no snarky comments about her being related to us, she's not.
Mila: At the moment, she's a little busy.
Stella: We'll catch up with her later during the campaign
Mila: Yes we do know Faye, the football community in Jeruselem is rather incentuous
Stella: Maybe not quite that word, but you know what I mean
Mila: Well, most intelligent folks would get the idea.

Stella: Oh yes, we're selling new promotional products for World Cup 93! They aren't quite for sale as yet
Mila: These ones don't have naked women, if you want that ... that's what the Naked News Jeruselem web site is for
Stella: Or particular people's OnlyFans pages.
Mila: More like just most of your social media posts
Stella: I shouldn't post when I'm drunk
Mila: You always say that

by **Banija** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 7:51 am

The Busukuma Post
Covering All of Banija, All of our News, All of the Time

Twins! Banija celebrates as Princess Muirne gives birth to twins, including a future Kabaka

HERZEGOVINA CITY, MORAVICA- Today, Mujaguzo Palace has announced that Omugabe Ssekamanya's wife, Princess Muirne, has given birth to twins- a son, Sekakama, and a daughter, Zalika. Sekakama was born first, 15 minutes older than Zalika. "Today, we would like to happily announce that the next generation of Banijan Kabakas has been born, to great fanfare, in Herzegovina City. Princess Muirne is absolutely healthy, and recovering nicely. She has given birth to two healthy babies- Omugabe Sekakama, who is a future Kabaka, and his younger twin sister(by 15 minutes), Omugaba Zalika. We have been on the phone with the Brenecian royal family to share congratulations with the news about their daughter, and it is a great thing that has happened. Kabaka Mwanga will delight at the birth of his great-grandchildren, and he, alongside the rest of the royal family, will soon trek north to see the babies."

It is indeed a big deal- a royal wedding, of course, leading to a royal baby. It is a big deal in the line of succession- as Omugabe Sekakama moves to third in the line of succession. His grandfather, Isebantu Mutungi, is obviously first in line, and his father, Omugabe Ssekamanya, is second in line. Sekakama is unique as well in that, like his father, he does not share the name of any former Kabakas or other of Banija- so, assuming everything is according to plan, he will be the first of his name. Of course, the throne in Banija goes by Salic Law, so Omugaba Zalika does not go into the line of succession- but she is fourth in precedence, and suddenly, the second highest ranking female royal in Banija by precedence, due to her birth- moving ahead of her aunt, Omugaba Ujamaa. By precedence, of course, the highest ranking woman in the royal family is the wife to the Kabaka, Luguba Katrina.

There were celebrations from all sides of the Lukiiko today. The Opposition leader spoke in the chamber. "The Royal family is healthy and strong- the country has much to celebrate with all these future generations of monarchs being born healthy. It shows that we have God's blessing as a nation- and we should pray for the continued health of Omugaba Muirne and her children."

The Katikkiro also spoke, issuing similar congratulations. "My personal congratulations to Omugabe Ssekamanya and Omugaba Muirne on the birth of their twins- a rarity, of course, for royals. We thank God for the health of both the mother and the babies- we are excited for the future prospects of Omugabe Sekakama. He is born into a very different Banija than the one of his grandfather or great-grandfather, and our hopes that he will be a God-driven King, just like his forefathers."

Sports: Kadongo Kamu earn third place at the Afro-Carribean Heritage Festival in final warmups before World Cup 93 Qualifying

BUSUKUMA, NATIONAL CAPITOL REGION- With World Cup 93 Qualifying rounding the corner, the Banijans are undergoing their final preparations before the journey to World Cup 93 begins. Banijans are as hopeful for this cycle as we have been in quite some time- we sit at #2 in the KPB rankings, having reached a trio of consecutive major finals(AOCAF 67, World Cup 92, AOCAF 68), as well as having reached finals in the Cup of Champions at the Eagle's Cup 14, and the Mihaly Invitational, over the course of the last two Finals.

"Obviously, our goal is what you'd expect it to be- our dream is to win the World Cup." Pam Scott told reporters. "It's not bold or arrogant to say that- it's the most important trophy that all of sport has to offer, and it is easily the most difficult trophy to win. That said, we feel as if we are in a position to do so. We have been building towards it. Deep runs, at tournament after tournament, continuously test this team's resolve, and this team's mettle. The result is that, up and down the player pool, we have a whole host of talented, experienced, and battle-tested players, both at the club level and more important, while wearing the shirt. But that cannot be realized without going to the World Cup, So the first goal is to qualify for the World Cup, and to qualify directly- and with this group, there is no way around it. We've got one hell of a brutal path to reach the Finals."

And that they do. First, of course, they took part in the Afro-Carribean Heritage Festival. What is that? Last taking place many cycles ago, it was a small friendly tournaments, hosted in Banija, won by this national team. The Afro and Carribean based nations participated, and the black majority nations of the World Cup descended upon Banija to participate in the tournament once again. This time, the field was much stronger than last time. Featured a WC92 Finalist(Banija), a WC92 Semifinalist(Nyowani Kitara), as well as the most recent Baptism of Fire winner(Kirungabi), there were plenty of big names in the field.

And yet, the tournament was won by Ziwana. "The tournament in general was a success." Said the long-time Executive Chairman of the RBSA, Robel Ezera- a man who has held the role for nearly 3 decades, as he's reaching his 12th cycle in charge of the organization. "A great celebration of black culture, as well as good football." Although the NT struggled, it was not necessarily unexpected- substitution rules were not in place for the tournament, as Pam Scott and other managers all figured with all sorts of experimental lineups. Banija did not score in either of the first two games on home soil, including a 1-0 loss to the eventual champions, Ziwana. But a 3-0 win to close out the groups, plus a 3-1 win to get third place, lifted spirits.

"I saw all that I needed to see from these games- guys ready to compete, plus the fans got to see the team- especially fans in cities that usually don't get a visit from the national team." Pam Scott told reporters. "I'm ready to make my final selections for the national team, and I'll have them out soon." She said that she'll take the final squad into a final pre-qualification friendly, against an opponent who has not been announced yet.

Speaking of- the RBSA has announced that their final pre-qualification friendly will take place in the Banijan Esportivan Territories of Njaza. A controversial decision from some- but one that the RBSA argues 'helps integrate the territories into the country'. "One of the things that this country does, is support its national teams. Njaza are now Banijan, ergo, they can support our national teams too. It is full of Banijans, and in Mugishaland, they will be ecstatic to have the natonal team palying there."

by **Nyowani Kitara** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 10:24 am

Nyowani Kitara President Muhoozi Kulan, giving a speech to the National Assembly

"My friends, my fellow assembly members!" His voice boomed throughout the building. He had gotten used to it. A man with almost no political experience before becoming President, in a chamber full of people without democratic political experience before being elected, he had gotten quite used to the role. And he had done an important thing- learning on the job. Learning to trust the country's allies- nations like Eura and Nephara, even if he wasn't a fan of Nafuna Akongo. Learning to navigate the waters that are Kitaran politics. The next lift, after this, was to really push the de-communization of the country. But that was for another day- there were more important things at stake.

"There are things that we must do to unite this country." He told the assembled body. "Things that we must do to improve this country." He looked around the body, and saw Nafuna Akongo, sitting there. It surprised most observers that she did not immediately resign, as soon as she lost her position as President. She had a grip on the KPWC, and they had quickly chosen her to lead the party as leader of the opposition. By acclamation- they didn't really have leadership elections, and she was the larger than life figure on the other side. Like her counterpart, she was settling into what life in a democracy was like.

"And something that is crucial to that- joining the Common Rushmori Community must be that next step." The room applauded- Nafuna Akongo's party had long supported the idea, and Muhoozi Kulan had spent the better part of the last year or so trying to convince his own party of the same logic. He had done so, successfully- whereas a year ago this would've divided his party into pieces, he now had gotten his party largely behind it. His junior coalition partners did not support the move, but the opposition votes would help them carry the day- and the junior partners were not going to blow up the Government over the move.

"This country has been through more than any other, over the past couple of years." He told the body. "And we are going to move forward. We are going to, today, make a statement that we are going to be part of the core, integral part of Rushmore. This chamber will vote, today, on sending in an application to the Common Rushmori Community. And we are going to vote emphatically to support this." His Assembly members stood up, and cheered loudly. Today would be the day that Nyowani Kitara would launch emphatically towards its future.

OOC Note: This newsletter has a slight anti-socialist bent, but they are fairly strict about the whole 'sticking to sports' thing

Nyowani Kitara Football Weekly
The voice for the working people of Nyowani Kitara

Nyowani Kitara reach the Final of the Afro-Carribean Heritage Festival as final warmups before World Cup Qualifying declared 'a rousing success'

Kitarans react after conceding the title deciding goal in extra time against Ziwana

BUSUKUMA, NATIONAL CAPITOL REGION, BANIJA- Nyowani Kitara, in an unprecedented move, decided to compete in a tournament in Banija, the Afro-Carribean Heritage Festival. It shows that the Yue manager, Liang Wei, doesn't necessarily call all the shots, even as he runs the KWFA as if he's solely in charge of football in Nyowani Kitara. "It was a good showcase to be able to warm up for the World Cup, and get the taste of that disastrous Copa Rushmori 42 out of our mouths." Liang Wei told reporters. The President, Muhoozi Kulan, said that participation in the event was a 'great way' to continue Nyowani Kitara's integration into the normal international community.

The group stages of the tournament went excellently. Matchday 1 saw our first ever NT match take place in the land of our ancestors, the original Kitara Region in Banija. "Obviously, the ability for the opening match of this tournament to be highly charged, and highly emotional, was clearly there." Said Liang Wei. "Credit to the boys for keeping things under check, and understanding that we have a job to do." The national team participated in an event, with various members of Banijan academia and civil society participating in an event, the day before the match, marking the Kitaran exile from Banija(no Banijan government officials, at any level, participated in the event). They fought to a tight 1-0 win over AO side Mlima Kijani.

Their next two matches went much more swimmingly in Isipongo. We had a highly anticipated match against the Baptism of Fire champions, Kirungabi, on Matchday 2. And the match was fantastic- we jumped out in front early, and cruised to a relatively easy 3-0 win. "Kirungabi just won the Baptism of Fire, which shows both the talent that they have now, and the potential that they will have later on." Said the team's manager, Liang Wei. "We're capable of competing with the best of the best, and last cycle's success was not a one-off." They followed that up with a 3-0 win over Akach to round out group play, taking 9 points from 9 from the three group stage matches in Banija.

They would take on Ziwana in the Festival Final, who were the winners of the other group- a team that had upset the Banijans, 1-0, in group play. While it was a wide-open affair, where 6 goals between them in 90 minutes was not enough to separate the two teams, it would be Ziwana who would earn the Festival's trophy, with an extra time winner to down Nyowani Kitara. Our best chance to win a minor trophy was scuffled. But Liang Wei said that the tournament was still very good. "These are the types of games that we have to play headed into Qualifying." He told reporters. "We're in Pot 1 for the very first time- we haven't had that experience before of being the hunted. And we're a lower tier Pot 1 side- we're the Pot 1 team everybody wanted to draw. We're going to need that underdog mentality, a measure of intensity that can carry us throughout the 22 matchday marathon that is World Cup Qualifying, so it's good that we got to play in a Final, even if it was a minor Final. We'll be ready."

Nyowani Kitara's opponents in the first double window will be 281st ranked Oflia, at home, before traveling to Macbon to take on the 122nd nation in the multiverse. "The goal is 4 points- although the target is 6 for that first window." Liang Wei told reporters. "We want to start fast, and keep pushing from there. If we start chasing in this group... Teams like Drawkland and Juvencus are going to be prepared to take our slot. We've got to build on the momentum of last cycle, and the only way to do that is to qualify for World Cup 93."

by **Cassadaigua** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 12:07 pm

It's been 50 World Cups,
by Chelsea Dufresne, Concord Heights Times

I might be about to make you feel old, but we are hitting a major milestone here in Cassadaigua during World Cup 93. It has now been 50 World Cups for the nation that won World Cup 50. You may have read the stories, of that fateful day way back when when Cassadaigua signed up for World Cup 43, and played in the corresponding Baptism of Fire. Now, I have to be careful because I can't say that we have been in all fifty of those World Cups as there were a couple of hiatuses, but this is a pretty significant milestone, nonetheless. Over the course of my covering what happens in World Cup 93, you will have me take a trip down memory lane, from some of our greatest moments in any of the three WCC-sanctioned events. We won't only talk about World Cup 50 and 51 or about the players who's numbers are retired on Monument Wall in Concord Heights because our history is so much greater than that. You may know a lot of the stories, but hopefully this can be an educational trip at our history. Prior to signing up for Baptism of Fire 30, no one knew what to expect. How would the world react to the cultural differences that are present in Cassadaigua? How would we hold up against the elite nations of the World? Would our people even be interested in watching World Cup soccer, or would we become a flash in the pan nation like we continuously see over and over again? Well, it looks like we made it. Now, it's World Cup 93. We're still here, and with trophies. More on this, as the tournament goes on.

For now, we're going to focus a little more on the Cup at hand. Since every qualifying campaign is formatted a little differently due to the amount of participating countries and possible other factors, here is a look at what we can expect this time around. There will be fifteen groups, and all of the group winners will be heading to either Chromatika or Tumbra. Instead of just having all of the second place teams also qualify, there will be a home and away playoff between second and third place teams, seeded in accordance to their placement in the overall standings. Since there are so many worthy nations and not enough spots in the World Cup itself, I like the idea of having the playoff between those sides even if it may not be the best for Cassadaigua, specifically. We have fallen out of pot 1, which of course means that we have to deal with an opponent that will be favored to grab one of the automatic spot. For us, that nation is none other than the reigning World Cup Champion, Zwangzug. Otherwise, I like our chances of getting into that playoff, but facing #52 Cabo Azure, a definite nation on the rise, and #54 will make it a challenge for our #24-ranked team. The threats aren't limited to them, obviously, as every nation has big aspirations right now and you never know when and where this year's Cinderella story will be. We'll also be dealing with Tecoia, Aleirave, Sannyamathland, The Cannaland Islands, Greater Kamilistan, Cormoe, Ingont, and Eastfield Lodge. Some of those names we have only heard very slightly and others are completely new to us. Fifty cups ago, we unknown to everyone as well, so any of those countries, whether a known commodity now or not, can be a spoiler within our group.

When looking at the team, we need to focus directly on the midfield. 34-year old Morgan Rosenblatt will participate in what many assume will be her last World Cup. That is not set in stone or anything, and she is still playing at a high enough level for this honor. Morgan will also remain the captain. However, the biggest concern here is in regards to our apparent inability to produce another big time player at this position. Joining Rosenblatt in the middle of the field are both Kelsey Werth and Krystal Sherwin once again, as starters. Look, I like both of them and they have earned their spot on the team, but you always want to have that one midfielder who is your go-to player in setting things up for the forwards. Kelsey and Krystal do well in their roles, but they do not seem to be the "next in line" at being our featured player here once Rosenblatt is no longer part of the team. 22-year old Kaitlin Millikan, who is listed as a substitute right now has the skill set to be that go-to player, but she is also still learning. The Concord Heights City star is an excellent ball handler and is creative with her passes, but every now and then is prone to making a mistake. Scouts have said of Millikan that they notice that she is prone to sloppiness when her team is down by one goal, more than in any other game situation. You hope that will get coached out of her, but in the World Cup, you can't really have that. It also is going to have manager Brittany Byers be a little hesitant about putting her into a game when the team is down by one. 17-year old Lauren Engle is being dubbed as our "next one", but there's going to be a gap between when Rosenblatt is no longer here and when Lauren arrives, assuming that Lauren even fulfills her lofty expectations.

The strength of the team is up front, and this is why Byers has moved from the traditional base 4-4-2 scheme to a 4-3-3. You sense that Byers would like to have a more balanced lineup because that is what she is accustomed to having, but also knows that to make the best use of the resources available to her, that the 4-3-3 is more logical right now for Team Cassadaigua. Rachel Boldin and Chloe Anderson, still just 26 and 25 years of age respectively, continue to excel and are ready to team up again. They will be joined up front by another 26-year old in Carly Patterson, but the depth of this group does not even stop with them. Substitutes Lexi McGregor and Shannon Cunningham are also going to get a lot of playing time and every now and then, I would expect Byers to give one of them the starting nod over Patterson unless Carly really has a big campaign. The highly outspoken Lexi McGregor seems to be capable of being a starter now long term, and she has made the most of her opportunities to date. Personally, I believe once Lexi shows the maturity to match her talent, that she will get the starting nod consistently. Even the reserves here are strong, and the oldest forward of this group are the 26-year olds. For now, this is going to get us over the inability to produce better midfielders during the current generation.

Turning to the defense, two starters are back and will start again (Brianna Ward and Madison Rutland). Rachel Becker, who was a substitute in the last World Cup is promoted, and the new face is Winchester City's Alyssa Marlin. At 22-years of age, Marlin comes off a dominant domestic season and has the look of someone that could be a starter here for a very long time. She made her international debut as a sub in the last Copa Rushmori, but should be able to handle the pressure of this role just fine. If there are any problems with that, the rest of the defensive group will be able to pick up the slack. In goal, Stacie Thornton returns there, to no one's surprise.

Get ready for the qualifying fun to get started in this milestone Cup for Cassadaigua. The fun begins in Sannyamathland in a couple days. Go Fillies!

by **Krytenia** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 5:10 pm

Party Like It's World Cup 89
By Rami Niblick in Emberton

GRAB your replica shirt and scarf and get ready to shout for the Dragons until you're hoarse; it's World Cup qualification season once again. BXE and Graham Lawton will be planning their latest attempt at restoring Krytenian footballing glory following a disastrous CAFA Cup campaign, but with a tricky draw into Group Thirteen, they'll have their work cut out for them, as well as some familiar names to deal with.

Probably the first name on the lips is Turori. According to the WCC rankings, the Eels are the third best side in the multiverse, with Krytenia ranked a lowly fifty-fifth. That said, those expecting a mismatch here may end up disappointed. Make no mistake, this is absolutely a rivalry game - though Turori aren't exactly the biggest targets for the Dragons, they are the oldest rivalry still on the board, with a history going all the way back to the second Baptism of Fire. Krytenia have played exactly fifteen hundred games since that meeting way back in the sepia fog of history, but the importance of that first meeting has never been lost. True, the last six meetings between the teams have produced one draw and five losses for our team, but aside from a four-nil reverse back in World Cup 66 qualifying, we have at least given them a game. Rewriting that particular corner of the history books on Matchday Ten would go a long way to guiding the Dragons back to the World Cup for the first time in a decade and a half - or at least we can hope, anyway.

Speaking of World Cup 89, that might not be the fondest memory for Krytenian fans - the side lost all three group games - but there is the opportunity for a modicum of revenge this time around. One of those defeats was at the hands of the Eels...and another was to another team in this group in the form of Baker Park. That was the third and most recent meeting between the Commonwealth and the Federal Kingdom, with the Dragons' only victory occurring the last time Krytenia played in the competition they invented, the 63rd AOCAF Cup. Thankfully, the dust seems to have well and truly settled on the AO-Anaia split - especially as the two top seeds are from the Other Place - so the Krytenians can expect a welcome on Matchday Seven that will be at worst lukewarm.

Surprisingly, though, the team that the Dragons will be most familiar with from recent play will actually be their first opponents - namely the Cheetahs and Reptiles Coalison. The CRC have been drawn against the Krytenians in qualifying for the third time, and are yet to record a victory over the boys and girls in sky blue in any of their four attempts across World Cups 86 and 91. They have, however, scored in each of those encounters exactly once, so expect either Rhinić or Sinusić to pop one in the onion bag at some point when the two sides meet in Tyfield in the opening matchup.

Following that match, and as part of the double-header international weeks that have dotted the footballing calendar in recent cycles, come the only other team in the group Krytenia have previous with, and it's an interesting one. The Dragons did lose their only meeting with the nation of Tikariot; it did, however, come in the group phase of Cup of Harmony 78, and we don't need to tell you how that tournament turned out. We have some lovely bling to do that for us. Whether or not this is a good omen, meanwhile, is an answer well and truly in the TBC column.

Aside from them, there are other opponents, and we would be loath to underestimate anyone. No matter whether they're debutantes like Inkwellistan or Oscioru, or potential banana skins like the Guanacasteca Republic or Montaña Verde where we simply haven't crossed paths in the past, no points can be assumed, and all victories earned. We've had enough Sulsulands and Rangers FCs in our closet as it is, and it is these games that will provide the foundation for a return to the promised land. So long as the likes of Quinn, Stringer, and Jack remember this, we should at least be in the mix. Onward!

by **Kelssek** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 7:02 pm

FUD STONKS
your source for online trading meta

FUD update 93/7.886 - Kelssek players to watch

The latest ratings changes to Football Ultimate Deck are live, and three players have had ratings updates worth mentioning. The one that’s probably getting the most attention is Issac Lafrenière. Lots of people have been grousing about his OVR getting knocked down to 82, but now it’s been knocked down even further to an OVR of 80.

This probably an overcorrection for his club team’s performance in the V-League; FUD has been notorious for nerfing the Declasse Division simply because it’s a second division, and his rating has been trending down along with the fortunes of Kionao Locals.

That said, with the World Cup qualifiers about to get underway, Lafrenière is a good buy. Lots of players will be looking to unload Lafrenière cards without really thinking that Foil puts a lot of weight on international matches – more than they really should – and Lafrenière is set to be the midfield first choice for Kelssek. Gabriel Lapierre is likely to feature less and is rumoured to be about to retire from the national team. If so, just Lafrenière picking up more caps is going to boost his rating back up.

Ingrid Lambert has gotten a slight bump in her stats and is a good buy, but not for too much. Lambert doesn’t have much room for ratings boosts, and we all know how defensive players tend to be underrated. That said, Lambert is a solid points getter as she rarely misses a game for Burnaby, and will likely be getting a lot more Kelssek caps this qualifying season. I wouldn’t go as far as trading a Phillip Lozic for her card, but I definitely wouldn’t do the reverse.

Getting a ratings boost, Bryan Hartpoach is also now 87 OVR. For a star player in the KFL he’s always been underrated, and now his transfer to Alnio is one of the highest fees ever seen in Kelssek, a metric that Foil often relies on in setting ratings. Likely to be a steady value over the next few months. Everyone expects Hartpoach to feature regularly for Kelssek as well as his club, so the points gain prospects are already priced in if you’re going to try and buy this card right now. You never know, Foil might decide to just make him an OVR 90 if he plays well – this would be the first time a Kelssek FUD card was over 90 since Colm Ó Tuathail was playing for Shamrock Cathair.

As with all FUDs, watch out for Foil to update ratings after the first international break as the World Cup qualifiers are set to kick off. Kelssek has a new national team manager so some unexpected names could well crop up if he ends up playing them, and those cards could get a sudden and big upward change just because Foil can't have a 4-star team like Kelssek stocked with OVR 70s. It's always worth keeping an eye on potential youngsters to get call ups and for Kelssek that's names like Camserhe and Goh-Lemaire.

by **Milchama** » Mon Feb 06, 2023 9:54 pm

Alexandria Times-Tribune-Sun-Moon-Sky-Picayune-Courier-Post-Pre-Forward-Current-Reader

Sports Section

Favorites Huh?

If there has been one difference between the Milchama of the World Cup 24-26 era and this new era of starting out again it was expectations. Unlike last time where we were overconfident newbies this version of Milchama was very clearly more mature and also much more realistic about our chances. While we knew we were better than our rank, our record was what it was and we knew that it would be tougher than we expected to get back and unlike baseball, where we are among the best, we're only above average historically at football and our most notable records; tied for most CoH wins all time, in the top 5 or top 10 for most WC finals lost, are more being losers than winners. We knew the score.

Then, as all Milchamian football fans know, came the miracle. We qualified in our only second ever WC back getting to World Cup 90 in Vilita and/or Baker Park. Sure, we got our butts kicked, but qualifying was a big deal and something that was awesome. And while that qualification might have been fluky (and it was very fluky), we were still a team on the rise but not one that expected to qualify for the World Cup. That made World Cup 91 even more of a disappoint, not because we didn't qualify, though that was disappointing, if expected. It was disappointing because we finished 6th in our group which was a clear step back. Some roster turnover and some nice coaching from the legend Darryl Lamerain led to the Warriors doing well in CoH and then we qualified in World Cup 92.

Why the long history 'graphs that most of you know? Because it relates to now. Milchama, yes that Milchama, is the ranked #31 in the multiverse. Milchama, yes that Milchama, is ranked 2nd in our group. So that means Milchama, yes that Milchama, is now a favorite to qualify. For the first time since a very long time ago (World Cup 65? World Cup 55? Who knows?) the Warriors come into a World Cup qualifying campaign expecting to qualify. And for the first time in even longer (possibly World Cup 50) not qualifying would be thought of as a horror. While we know it came happen to anybody, look at AIF last time [ed note: They go by The Holy Empire now] or Holy Empire whatever, we know it's possible that Margaret could come against us but we expect better than that. We are favorites and we're act like it by being the arrogant pieces of sh** that we know we can be! So with that let's see our group!

Gortolekua (90) - I know they RP a lot but they're ranked 90th so they're much than us by fiat. That's how this works right? Either way, expect 2 easy victories against this lot.

Aust Scor (UR) - They didn't know to sign up for the BoF or they're some nation that slipped through the cracks during our Isolation. Either way they suck. 6 more points.

Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom (56) - I guess they're the 4th seed. Not bad but, frankly, we should be able to take these guys. It's games like this that will decide whether the Warriors make it to the World Cup. We should get 4 points here and hopefully 6.

Savigliane (16) - The top seeds and somebody who broke at the last World Cup, unlike us. They're not bad. This feels like a game where we try really hard and then lose like 3-2 on a late goal or something awful like that. Either way, expect some losses here. 1 point.

Katterimunk (191) - They're new but they're already tracking their history which puts them one up on us since we don't know basic details like who was on the roster for our first ever World Cup. We blame Tel Yehuda. Either way, we shouldn't lose to newbies who have just been to their first BoF. Two wins.

Olastor (216) - Wait, first BoF? Who writes this stuff. You can't do more than one. Either way, Olastor is another BoFer and another 2 wins.

Melbergia (245) - These guys again?! First baseball and now this. It took an epic collapse from the Melbergians to put TJUN-ia through to the WBC and they're lack of interest in baseball seems to extend to soccer. We really do need 2 wins against a bad team like this.

Xanneria (111) - In many ways there is no history here but in other ways, based on other nations, there is so much history here. I don't really know what that means what I do know is that Xanneria isn't great at soccer. Expect 2 wins.

Southern Palm Islands (159) - We prefer the Northern Palm Islands. Only expect 4 points here though, why? Why not? Let's have bogey team predicted for some reason.

Ancherion (112) - I've definitely seen these guys around before. I got nothing though on what I remember. They're only one rank back from Xanneria, kinda of a lucky draw for them and unlucky for Xanneria. Two wins from us either way.

HUElavia (48) - They were trash talking us earlier. F these guys. 2 wins and it'll be easy too!

Milchama (31) - That's us! If you didn't understand what our deal was with all the other paragraphs then you really need to check your reading comprehension because, sheesh, we made it easy didn't we? Either way, expect 2 wins.

by **Oberour Ar Moro** » Tue Feb 07, 2023 12:00 am

Rodolfo Zelaya Announced As Oberour Ar Moro Manager

At a press conference at Tourbillon Forest today the Oberour Ar Moro Football Management Committee announced Rodolfo Zelaya as the new manager for the Obeorur National Team.

"This is an exciting opportunity I am very pleased to take on", said Zelaya.

"Rodolfo Zelaya is one of the great strikers of his generation," said FMC Chairman Denis de Lescoët. "As manager we're tasking him to make the Dragoons the most dangerous attacking team in football."

When Zelaya was asked to describe his intended style, he said that "...on the pitch we're going to play a disciplined, precise, high-pressure, high-tempo game. One that brings the fans in the Parade Grounds on our side and pushes the men forward."

Zelaya comes to Oberour Ar Moro after serving as an assistant with the Huayramarca National Team from World Cups 90-92. Los Cóndores qualified for every World Cup Zelaya served as an assistant.

This is Zelaya's first time in charge of his own team, after his three cycles of service as an assistant. However, the FMC rejected any indication of Zelaya being unprepared. "He is fully aware of the pressures and responsibilities of managing," said de Lescoët, jumping in to answer after Zelaya was asked about his lack of coaching experience.

Rodolfo Zelaya is best known for his playing career. In his playing days Zelaya was considered one of the best strikers in the world. Born in San José Guayabal, he began his career with the Guayabalense Liga Premier side Alianza FC, where he was a league leader in scoring and his side won multiple titles. He then moved onto Northbrook Diamonds in Polar Islandstates, winning the league three times in a row. He later played for 1830 Cathair in Audioslavia, again a top scorer while also leading the team to a Champions' Cup. While succeeding in the domestic game, Zelaya was a leader of San José Guayabal's national team, but is identified as a Huayramarcan today.

While the FMC was impressed with Zelaya's coaching record, Huayramarca was less so. The Federación Huayramarquina de Fútbol dismissed manager Omar Caicedo and then-assistant Rodolfo Zelaya after los Cóndores were eliminated in the quarter finals of the most recent CAFA Cup.

The Journey of Twenty-Two Matches Begins With Two Giant Steps

As Oberour Ar Moro readies for World Cup 93 qualifying, the goal must be to make the playoffs for the first time since World Cup 88 qualifying.

The winner of each group qualifies automatically while the teams that finish second and third go to a playoff. The Dragoons, thanks to their 68th placed world ranking, are a Pot 4 team.

Their first match is against Group 10's Pot 3 team: Flavovespia, the world's 36th ranked side and two-time winner of the CAFA Cup. Before any matches have been played it would be expected that the fight for the final qualification spot goes directly through Hadford Hill.

Things then only get tougher immediately following Flavovespia the Dragoons travel to face the best football team in the world: Valanora. The Eternal Empire are five-time World Cup champions, and the Marauders show no sign of withering.

The Dragoons haven't won their opening match of World Cup qualifying since World Cup 86, and these slow starts can brutalize a team's momentum. To start qualifying with two losses wouldn't be instant death for their long-term chances, but the Dragoons can barely afford to fall behind after their first stanza of games. While they would prefer at least one win out of their first two matches, one point may be more achievable and be just as acceptable. Anything would be better than zero points and sitting bottom of Group 10 so early.

At the very least, we will have learned something about the Dragoons and their new manager after this initial brace of matches.

by **Sylestone** » Tue Feb 07, 2023 12:11 am

Season One Part Ten

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR SENTIENT

Part One

The Bay Reserve, Betham

The boy screwed his face up in concentration. He could still feel his quadricep after pulling it earlier in the season, but in a feat of sheer determination, was able to put it beside him as he took up his position on the edge of the box, awaiting teammate Jade Wettenhall’s delivery. With time running out, this match was quickly becoming the boy’s most important to date but unless his side could pull off a remarkable, violent turnaround, it would end in devastation.

The boy’s name was Brett Sarcav-Jones. At 15 years of age, he was almost a year younger than the second-youngest player in the Potty League - Sylestone’s Under-21 football league. The club he was playing for was Avondale City, and they were up against league-leaders Betham FC on the final matchday of the season, at the Bay Reserve as the Toilet League had been completed the week earlier. It was a top of the table clash and if either side came out with the full three points, the Potty League and a spot in the IFCF Rising Stars Cup was theirs. But things weren’t quite going to plan. With ten minutes of regular time to spare, the Lime Greens were 1-0 down and had barely had a look in, the Pandas dominating from start to finish. Courtesy of Adam Bolton’s 50th-minute strike, the hosts had gone 1-0 up and since, had been able to show that they were more than capable of maintaining that slender lead.

Half an hour after the goal, though, Avondale City finally had their chance. Over the course of the Potty League, Jade Wettenhall’s inswinging corners had been a massive cause of concern for opposition defences as it seemed that, more often than not, the Lime Greens were able to cause something to happen from them, before over the past month or two, fellow Division One opponents had discovered ways of dealing with them. After all, these sides had qualified as top four in their respective leagues and if any seven teams were going to find out ways to counter this tactic, it would be those seven.

So Wettenhall tried something different, something that had been discussed at training and briefly trialled, with a decent amount of success. Instead of looping the ball towards the front post, Brett found himself in acres of space on the right corner of the box and moments later, with the ball at his feet and an eternity to make a decision.

An eternity he didn’t need. Brett may only be 15, but his vision and awareness must be some of the best in the Potty League. With two burgundy defenders approaching on either side, he knocked the ball forward, past opposition midfielder Jake Hopkins to the feet of Charlotte Eastwood, who applied a little deflection to the shot - just enough to send Luca Yali the wrong way.

That was in the 87th minute. With the score now 1-1, the Lime Greens began to commit more numbers forward than ever, bursting with unwarranted energy thanks to Eastwood’s equaliser. But the Pandas still did their best to keep themselves in the game, creating chances of their own to snuff out their opponents’ hopes, wasting precious minutes as the game ticked into three minutes of stoppage.

Just as it appeared over, though, something happened.

With less than fifteen seconds remaining on the clock and the referee beginning to think about placing the whistle to his lips, midfielder Maya Whiddon pulled off a remarkable slide tackle to catch Bethamite winger Madeleine O’Donnell off guard, giving her no opportunity to retrieve the ball before she launched it up the field of the play, right into the charging path of Hugo Buckmaster, with Eastwood and Brett himself both in the fray ready to lend a hand.

Still, they were outnumbered. All three of the Pandas’ defenders were there, ready to do whatever they could to keep hold of their precious point - one that, due to goal difference, would hand them the Potty League title in its inaugural edition. Gradually, Betham’s back line pushed Buckmaster to his left but Brett, seeing something nobody else had, began to sprint down to the right, completely unmarked. Noticing this, the substitute forward suddenly halted his goalward drive forward and instead took the ball away from his defenders, chipping the goalkeeper and getting it to land at the far post - right where Brett was about to reach within a matter of milliseconds.

This was Avondale City’s, and Brett’s, chance. While their senior team had always seemed to fall short at the final hurdle when it came to winning the Toilet League, the Under-21 team was still new. Could they break the trend?

Brett did his best, but Luca Yali had other ideas. Ideas that ultimately cost the Lime Greens their spot in next year’s IFCF Rising Stars Cup, and quite probably handed the Pandas’ goalkeeper a place in Elliot Humphreys’ Di Bradini Cup squad. After taking a touch and turning towards goal, Brett fired the ball towards the back of the net, only for Yali’s outstretched fingertips to scrape the ball on its flight path, sending it into the post and out of play.

And then it was over. Brett was on the ground, head facing skyward as a collective yell of triumph echoed from vast proportions of the Bay Reserve. Soon, he found himself surrounded by the consoling arms of fellow teammates, but it meant nothing to the young teenager. Especially the fact that there was almost nothing he could’ve done about it without taking an undue risk.

* * *

Kitchener Stadium, Avondale

The following day

“Brett, can I have you for a moment, please?”

Brett looked up, quizzically. Upon returning to Avondale the following night, Under-21 manager Conor Downes had insisted that all players come along for an hour the following day to talk over the match. Upon entering, Brett had said or done nothing, slumping down at his bench and refusing to talk to anyone. Now this greying, middle-aged man - one he had only seen a couple of times back at the training field - wanted to talk to him? For what? Thoughts ran rampant through the 15-year-old’s mind as he got up, all eyes on him, and wandered over to the door.

As they exited the room, the man introduced himself to Brett. “In case you don’t already know, I’m Sean Baskerville, CEO of the club and second to only the owners themselves. Come along to my office, we have things to discuss.”

Brett followed Mr. Baskerville up two flights of stairs, along a brightly lit corridor and into the final room on the right. “Take a seat,” the club’s CEO ordered as he plonked himself upon a supremely comfortable office chair on the opposite side of the desk. Brett closed his eyes for a moment and silently crossed his fingers, before obliging and taking the seat offered to him.

Mr. Baskerville pulled a slip of paper from his drawer and placed it between the pair. “We’ve all been very impressed with how you’ve played this year, Brett. I’ll be honest, I already know for a fact that there are at least two clubs wanting to sign your services for next year, including that maroon and black one just over the other side of the Hungerford River. However, we’ve had a look at finances, and opted to give you this option first.” He indicated towards the sheet of paper, Brett’s eyes widening as the realisation dawned on him.

Mr. Baskerville smiled. “Yes, that’s a professional contract, right there, and all you need to do is sign it. I’m happy to give you a little bit of time to think about it, because after all, your season did only finish yesterday. Make sure you read all the terms and conditions on the letter, we don’t want you doing anything too brash.”

But Brett wasn’t listening. He was already poring over the sheet of paper that could define his future, mouth agape in shock upon reading numbers under the finances section. Quickly skimming through the remainder of the letter, ensuring he didn’t miss anything, he looked up, eyes glimmering.

“Uh… fank- thank you. Y- yes, I’ll sign it.”

Mr. Baskerville smiled, flashing dazzling white teeth in Brett’s direction. “I was hoping you’d say that. John will be pleased to hear that. I know he has you in his plans for the upcoming season. For now, you are dismissed, although I’ll be calling you back later today to finalise a couple of things and organise a photoshoot.”

Brett stared at him, refusing to believe the words that exited his mouth. John Lawson, senior team manager, had him in his plans for the upcoming season? What an excellent early birthday present!

PRE-QUALIFYING FRIENDLIES

Tumbra vs Sylestone @ Eagles Club, Straton

Tumbra: Unknown

Sylestone (4-4-1-1): Fuller; Holt (Davis 83’) - Mornington (Pearson 46’) - Hand Sanitiser - Keller; Henling - Rodway - Brown (Paterson 83’) - Fridge; Keyes (Love 63’); Hightower ( 55’) (Strathfield 70’)

Tumbra 0-0 Sylestone
none - none

Sylestone vs Ethane @ Sentient Oval, Kirkham

Sylestone (4-4-1-1): Brick Wall; Ironing Board - Faucett - Washing Machine - Dishwasher (Toilet 59’ ( 67’)); Holmes - Bar Stool (Lawson 90+2’) - Blair - Jones; Fleetwood (Keyes 78’); Tumble Dryer

Ethane: Unknown

Sylestone 1-0 Ethane
Jones 62’ - none

Sylestone vs South Newlandia @ Avondale International Sports Stadium, Avondale

Sylestone (4-4-1-1): Holmes; Holt - Pearson ( 27’) - Hand Sanitiser (Damasekara 72’) - Toilet; Stanton (Holmes 66’ ( 90’)) - Paterson - Brown (Blair 46’) - Fullers; Fleetwood (Love 66’) - Hightower

Sylestone 1-0 South Newlandia
Hightower 20’ - none

Lozho vs Sylestone @ Protchen Stadium, Protchen

Lozho (4-2-3-1): de Jong; Srejzjajk (Drezhon 51’) - Romulus ( 67’) - Zaratriaias ( 45+2’) - Zohzo; Blyth - Droozle; Zane (Smith 65’) - Zouzal (Forrozonich 65’) - Zoan (Zoomfield 88’); Obamovich

Sylestone (4-4-1-1): Cavendish; Davis - Washing Machine (Mornington 80’) - Damasekara - Dishwasher (Keller 80’); Henling - Rodway ( 71’) - Lawson - Fullers (Jones 46’); Love (Keyes 46’); Fleetwood (Strathfield 90+3’)

Lozho 3-0 Sylestone
Romulus 5’; Zoan 26’; Obamavich 88’ (p)

Starting Lineup vs Jeruselem @ The Bay Reserve, Betham

Fuller; Holt - Mornington - Hand Sanitiser - Toilet; Henling - Rodway - Brown - Jones; Fleetwood; Tumble Dryer

Starting Lineup vs Quakmybush @ Ground of Dunkirk, Dunkirk

Callum Holmes; Ironing Board - Pearson - Faucett - Keller; Cayden Holmes - Paterson - Bar Stool - Fullers; Fleetwood; Strathfield

by **Acastanha** » Tue Feb 07, 2023 2:22 am

Are You Ready for World Cup?

It is that time of the year again as World Cup qualifying round is about to kick off. It seems just yesterday that Acastanha reached the play-off of World Cup 92 and then being ousted in the group stage of Cup of Harmony. What a bittersweet journey. But the past should stay in the past. And let's see the future with a bright hope. Hopefully.

The Arrows started the qualifying round with a home match against Novaros. It is a short rest time for the team after their Mandalanusa Cup campaign which resulted in a huge success. The team was paraded in the main street of Amarelda, the country's capital after bringing home their first trophy. Yes, Acastanha win the 12th Mandalanusa Cup after defeating their neighboring country, Sendhang in final. The win bring joy and happiness to the fans and supporters. And the whole country celebrate it all day long. But the celebration ends quickly as the World Cup is knocking on the door. There's only little time for preparation. The manager, Archanankar also has to quickly gather the information about potential players in the country. As the qualifying round is run a long period, he doubt that the same player can always be included in the squad. Well, maybe one or two but not the whole squad. Especially with the domestic league is still running.

Rumour has it that many new names are noted by the manager. Including the recently outgoing players, Hector Kasvali and Geraldo Panguang. Sport expert stated that the manager, Manuel Archanankar is trying to keep up with the momentum. He see that the team is still on high spirit after the win and he hopes he can bring the spirit into the World Cup.

"I think he already know that the qualifying round of World Cup is a long and tiring process. And relying on the same players over and over again could affected their overall performances. He won't want a good start but with a declining performance to the end. He needs a stable performance."

Joao Ursano
Sport expert

Manuel Archanankar have announced the line up for their first 2 matches. 26 names are called. And they look the same as the squad on the winning match. It seems like Archanankar doesn't want to gamble in this first match by using a new set of squad. "There's no room for error," he said repeatedly. And we all hope no errors for our beloved team.

by **HUElavia** » Tue Feb 07, 2023 6:16 am

A New Road to Glory!

HUElavia are given a solid WC Qualifiers draw with plenty of optimism in the matches ahead.

HUElavia returns to the Qualifiers and once more, a Qualifying Draw was performed to determine the groups for the Qualifiers. It was set for 15 groups of 12 teams, with the group winners advancing directly to the Final Tournament, while the 2nd and 3rd placed teams would be seeded into a Round-Robin playoff to determine the final 15 teams.

Coach Aveiro was present with the HUElavian delegates as they awaited the draw, hoping for a favorable draw. Fortunately enough, it was a decent draw for Los Amarillos/Os Amarelos. HUElavia (48) was drawn into Group 14 with the likes of: Gortolekua (90), Aust Scor (UR), Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom (56), Savigliane (16), Katterimunk (191), Olastor (216), Melbergia (245), Xanneria (111), Southern Palm Islands (159), Ancherion (112), and Milchama (31). A decent draw that brings optimism for the HUElavian fans and media, but only if the team does not play down to their competition.

Thus, with the venues, opponents and matchdays released, the HUElavian WC 93 Qualifiers schedule will be as follows:

Matchday 1:
Aust Scor vs HUElavia

Matchday 2:
HUElavia vs Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom
Estadio Capital, Curumba

Matchday 3:
Savigliane vs HUElavia

Matchday 4:
HUElavia vs Katterimunk
Estadio Antonio Fernandez Sganyodaiyo, Rebes

Matchday 5:
Olastor vs HUElavia

Matchday 6:
HUElavia vs Melbergia
Estadio do Oro, Ourao

Matchday 7:
Xanneria vs HUElavia

Matchday 8:
HUElavia vs Southern Palm Islands
Caja de Caramello, Armalla

Matchday 9:
Ancherion vs HUElavia

Matchday 10:
Milchama vs HUElavia

Matchday 11:
HUElavia vs Gortolekua
Estadio HUGames, Sega

Matchday 12:
HUElavia vs Aust Scor
Estadio Natalia Coentrao Rocha, Ponhadil

Matchday 13:
Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom vs HUElavia

Matchday 14:
HUElavia vs Savigliane
Estadio Maria Santos Leite, Miras

Matchday 15:
Katterimunk vs HUElavia

Matchday 16:
HUElavia vs Olastor
Goang Stadium, Goang

Matchday 17:
Melbergia vs HUElavia

Matchday 18:
HUElavia vs Xanneria
Estadio Banco de HUElavia, Fuenteque

Matchday 19:
Southern Palm Islands vs HUElavia

Matchday 20:
HUElavia vs Ancherion
Estadio do Bosque, Ilmagre

Matchday 21:
HUElavia vs Milchama
Estadio Internacional, San Rafael

Matchday 22:
Gortolekua vs HUElavia

After the draw, Coach Aveiro had this to say: "We're very satisfied with the draw and we're looking forward to taking on our opponents during these qualifiers. In particular, we feel we can take on Milchama and we can contend for 2nd Place in Group 14. All we can do is train and study film, and give it our best in the matches."

Fans are already purchasing the tickets, as is tradition that 15% of capacity will go to away supporters, while the remaining 85% goes for the HUElavian public. Fans are also purchasing the new uniforms, which have been a hit in the HUElavian public and is generally described as "the quintessential HUElavian sports uniform." Fans feel optimistic that this could be a good run that could end in a World Cup appearance.

Here's to a great qualifying run!

FORÇA HUELAVIA! VAMOS HUELAVIA! GO HUELAVIA!

by **West Barack and East Obama** » Tue Feb 07, 2023 8:21 am

BARACK OBAMA'S NEXT TOP MIDFIELDER

Next Top Midfielder Finals!

Hello to all Obamen! After rigorous auditions, several imprisonments and a helicopter crash, ten potential midfielders have advanced to the Barack Obama's Next Top Midfielder finals. Half of these lucky ten will advance to finals finals, where the winner will be offered the opportunity to play as a midfielder for the West Barack and East Obama National Football Team. The final ten will go through tough challenges in order for the prime footballer to be selected.

Introducing: Our Judges!

All finalists will perform in front of four distinguished judges, who will determine LIVE whether you are fit to be Barack Obama's Next Top Midfielder. Their expertise in sports and showbiz will pinpoint the next great player to lead our team to glory. Attached below are their biographies and a short video clip from them! Enjoy

Sergei Dostoevsky Obamovich

Better known to Lozhoan audiences as media baron Sigmund Digmund, Obamovich is the whole reason this entire competition exists. After first hosting 'Digmund's Dearest' talent show at his primary school, Obamovich realised his potential as a star manager. He emigrated to Lozho where he created his massive entertainment empire, which includes many television studios, music publishers and of course talent shows. Even if he is perhaps a stranger to sports, he always knows a star when he sees one, and is perfect to sit on this prestigious panel.

"Alright... is this thing on? Okay. Hello everyone, my name is Sergei, but you can call me Sergei. I'm one of the judges of the upcoming Next Top Midfielder show! Woo!

Anyways, from a young age, I've always believed that hard work and patriotism will get you anywhere. That's why I believe in this great cause. A fantastic, highly-televised show to get stars and anyone who helps them all the riches that they deserve, as well as fulfilling their dreams. Enjoy!"

Zoey Zaza

Lozhoan internet celebrity Zoey Zaza will be the next Top Midfielder Judge! After becoming viral in the nation for a series of 'LIVING A FULFILLING LIFE CHALLENGE!' shorts one year ago, Zaza has been a pop culture phenomenon in the country. Her critical analysis of current internet trends, whether niche or mainstream, through her videos has sparked numerous debates and has on occasion stopped terrorist cells from recruiting members. Her analytical thinking is a perfect fit for a talent show such as this. Welcome Zoey Zaza!

"Hey everyone! I'm Zoey Zaza. Here's something way more exciting than that Subway Surfers clip you're watching: Barack Obama's Next Top Midfielder! Tune in every Sunday to watch me praise great footballers and encourage worse ones to improve! Yay!!!!"

Chuck Obamafinakis

Youngest brother in the Obamafinakis family, Chuck Obamafinakis is an accomplished lawyer with brilliant skills in destroying opponents in the court. He's also well known for his accomplishments in the field, being the goalkeeper coach for the high-flying West Barack and East Obama national football team. His football experience undoubtedly makes him qualified to judge who is Obama's Next Top Midfielder!

"Hey guys. I'm Chuck. Yeah, the goalkeeper coach is judging the next best midfielder. Isn't the world funny? Of course, I was humbled to accept such an opportunity, especially when other coaches apparently passed over it. Remember to catch Barack Obama's Next Top Midfielder on Sundays!"

Wolfgang Obamadeus-Mozart

And last but not least, DJ supreme Wolfgang Obamadeus-Mozart will be our final judge for the Barack Obama's Next Top Midfielder competition! Experienced in the New Barack City rap scene, Obamadeus-Mozart managed to break through and become one of the nation's biggest musical artists as part of a duo (which shall remain nameless). An expert on shooting for the stars, he's also known for shooting on target, as a pivotal starting player for the Obaman national team.

"Yo yo yo! DJ Momo in the house. I've been asked to judge the next best midfielder, and you know what they, you miss the shots you don't take, so I'm doing this! Woo! I'll be deciding if... um.... a midfielder is good. Will they... take my position in the team? Who... knows right? Haha. Tune in on Sundays!"

World Cup 93 - RP Thread

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