Football has been around for about half a century in San Ortelio, yet the Serie Nazionale only enters its fifteenth edition so far. Before, due to logistical reasons, there were two domestic competitions, one on each of the peninsulas which constitute San Ortelio. However, due to the small size of the nation, only a limited number of teams were able to put up a good fight and this did not assure much excitement. As such, the twelve best united in the Serie. In theory, this is not a closed league and the red lantern can be challenged by the winner of the lower division for a promotion spot. However, this has only happened successfully once in the last decade as most lower tier teams do not aspire to move up a flight - the Serie Nazionale contains all semi-pro teams, those below are pure amateurs.
The competition itself runs in two halves. Before the winter break, there is a double round-robin tournament constituting twenty-two matchdays. The top six continue as the Serie A, starting with a single point advantage for every win before the break. They face off, once home and away. The other six compete in the Serie B with the same ruleset. During the second half, the teams also compete in the Coppa delle Stella and regional cup tournaments. The Coppa delle Stella forms the second national trophy. Twelve lower-tier teams join the four weakest Serie Nazionale sides in the opening round, the other eight get in the draw the next week. All confrontations are single game, with a return match in case of a draw. Each of the five regions also compete for a local trophy, yet the Serie sides do not always fully commit to those.
Logistically, it is important to note that our small nation only has three pitches deemed worthy of first-division level. One of them [Corsa Quersia - 2500 seats] is located on the northern coast and caters to the teams from San Bonifazio (Pesari, Borgonovo, Montelcampo) and Santa Sofia (Stampano). A second one [Olimpico - 6000 seats] lies in a bay on the territory of San Pancrazio and forms the home ground for the sides from that region (the Catrallo’s, Esca and Fagli). Last but not least, there is Dietro Baracche, the old army marching ground with its characteristic single stand which forms the home of the two clubs from San Mamerto (Nottori, San Savola) and San Servazio (Astello, Redoccio)
The overview immediately starts with the team which has been tipped by the bookmakers as the favourite to grab the title. And to be honest, nothing less is expected in Catrallo, from the board room to the stands. It’s the only logical consequence of grabbing seven titles and five Coppa’s in fourteen years. Catrallo Calcio forms the boisterous, confident playboy of the competition: they look dashing in navy and white, are always at the forefront when it comes to luxury and never hesitate to snap up that talented youngster from your favourite side. Winning comes as a second nature for the team from the informal capital of San Ortelio and there is no reason why that would change this year.
Mario Anza can count on a well-balanced squad which is one of the few with serious depth, this ability to rotate in the easier games has always been an ace up their sleeve. Due to that strength, Anza opts for a 3-5-2 with wings who do their best to suffocate the opposition and Di Masi as sole defensive midfielder. The back three might be hard as nails but still possess enough technical skills to earn their spot into the signature style of Calcio - high pressure, loads of passing and a touch of class. Their front duo might lack some height but both Spadoni and Garofalo have a track record larded with goals.
XI - Filippo Pompa * Federico Dema, Giuseppe Rocca, Gaetano Lucarelli * Alessio Di Masi, Fabio Mascolo, Roberto Agostinone, Gianmarco Del Prete, Lorenzo Moreschini * Davide Spadoni, Carmine Garofalo
Star Player - Gianmarco Del Prete. The most hated player for any opposition, ‘La Leggenda’ for the fans of Calcio. A playmaker who will not only dazzle your goalie with his free kicks but who will find the most insulting way to slice open your defense. Is less lazy than many account him for but still a player who puts the brains above the legwork.
Hailing from the ‘end of the world’ Esca, the relatively remote fisher port at the tip of the peninsula, this club is the successor of AS Esca when the club feared to tip over financially about ten years ago. They have come a long way since, from narrowly avoiding dropping down a tier to being a decent midtier club who can aspire a spot in the Serie A. They managed to do so by honing their youth department, sporting no less than seven players below 25 in the starting line up. Unione still is strapped for cash and might fear losing some key players if they rattle the big names this year.
Manager Luigi Delphi forms a bit of a folk legend, with his characteristic moustache and incomprehensible dialect, but beneath the surface, one can find a shrewd tactician. Well aware you’re sometimes the hammer and sometimes the nail, he will not hesitate to reshuffle the board when needed. In general, he relies on his powerful midfield led out by Albertoni and Tozzuolo, who must combine about seven lungs. In case of emergency, the length of Stefano Baiocco forms a plan B which is rarely a joy to watch, but more often than not effective.
XI - Jacopo Burrai * Mattia Righetto, Tommaso Crilese, Salvatore Moscati, Paolo Melchiorri * Alberto Sgarbi, Carlo Albertoni, Gabriele Tozzuolo, Stefano Falzerano * Alessandro Tozzuolo, Stefano Baiocco
Star Player - Salvatore Moscati. In a side with lots of good but no exceptional players, Moscati managed to earn a special place in the heart of the supporters. Starting player at eighteen, captain at twenty-two, he has been the guide through rough times and the symbol for the endurance of the club. Knows the tricks and will use them.
Named after the year of foundation, but according to critics after the number of fans which they draw. Some consider ‘La Fa’ as the personal playtoy of construction magnate Renzo Di Callare but on the other hand, if he was really committed, they would be better. Fact is that they miss a dedicated fan base and somehow manage to hoover up players who are either past their prime or never will fulfill their true potential. Being a manager cemetary hasn’t really done them much favours either and in a normal relegation system, they would have gone down a few times. This time around, they actually look less shabby than usual - but that sentiment tends to last only a month or two at Fagli.
The ‘new’ man in the tracksuit is Silvano Laghi who starts his third stint with the team - you can’t expect a nation of less than half a million people to have an abundance of coaches. He inherited a selection which should at least be able to knock in a few goals but is in dire need of organisational stability. Laghi aims to do so with a sturdy ‘rectangle’ in the back, based upon a duo of defensive midfielders who take no prisoners. That leaves a lot of pressure on Lorenzo Tosi, a Calcio reject with a spotty personal record, to guide the team to greener pastures. If he shows up, they’ll be fine else...
XI - Elia Scardina * Luca Ghidotti, Edoardo Ferrara, Mirco Rossi, Matteo Labruzzo * Antonio Lamberti, Michele Faini, Lorenzo Tosi * Riccardo Ciccone, Emanuele Bignami, Filippo Panatti
Star Player - Emanuele Bignami. Physical and mad like a donkey, this is the kind of striker no defender looks forth to. He will breath down your neck for ninety minutes and will prey on every mistake made. Also, he will drive his own fans crazy by ruining some sitters but at the end of the day, Bignami remains an assurance for double goal figures.
Pesari remains the only side from the eastern peninsula to win a title, a feat of which they are particularly proud. ‘I Pappagalli’, after their dazzling combination of yellow and blue, even have four of those on the mantle but have fallen a bit behind the other two of the ‘Big Three’ in later years. Some claim that positioning themselves as understudy for Calcio and trying to follow in the financial rat race remains a questionable move but FC seems back on the road up. They were still distanced by Calcio and Virtus last year but look ready to step it up a notch in the upcoming season. Picking up a well-sought after talent such as Attilio Quintarelli underlines their ambition to return to greatness.
If the shit hits the fan eventually, Giorgio Guerra cannot blame the amount of potential in his selection. Lanzafame could well be the best goalie around and his defense clicks better and better with each passing season. At first sight, Guerra seems to employ a traditional diamond 4-4-2 but the vertical movement from his midfielders gives it a tactical edge. Those for whom the glass is half full will claim that Pesari bring modern football, with movement and technical prowess. Others dare to conclude that FC runs a lot but forgets that football is about scoring goals - neither striker is a major asset.
XI - Enrico Lanzafame * Giancarlo Passuello, Pietro Mazziero, Ercole Venturato, Alessio Rota * Attilio Quintarelli, Sandro Zanoni, Giacomo Favaro, Alberto Bortolotto * Giancarlo Laghi, Roberto Pella
Star Player - Giacomo Favaro. Still only twenty-three, Favaro became the face of the new renaissance for I Pappagalli and aspires to turn that reputation into silverware this year. Ambitious yet courteous off the pitch, a bulldog with a nifty pass and a mean shot on it, he clicks extremely well with the fans who were sick and tired with their primadonnas.
Every decent metropolis has an admirable ‘second team’. Although San Ortelio lacks major hubs, Inter does a more than decent effort to act as that side your mother admires because they ‘never give up and look so dashing in purple’. As any self-respecting second team, they never won a trophy but do still boast about that victory over city rivals Calcio three years ago. Retrieving their supporters from the harbour borrows rather than the city centre, they are assured of a loyal fan base who don’t really mind if they end up in the Serie B when all cards are on the table as long as the shirt is dirty.
The club culture makes a self-fulfilling prophecy when it comes to the hand which has been dealt to Piero Fezzardi. The goalkeeper is an actual bouncer on nights without a fixture and the central defending pairing can make a decent scrap book from their red cards. Striker Saligari counts on his main asset, headers, to make a difference and being a midfielder at Inter comes with a neck cramp. It looks as if Fezzardi will further cultivate that kick-and-rush line in the upcoming twelve months, larded with the more cynical approach to defending. You’ve been warned.
XI - Davide Roscioli * Giuseppe Nicoletti, Mariano Calcaterra, Simone Tebaldi, Luca Perini * Roberto Checchin, Eros Fidanza, Guido Gorini, Fabiano Scirea, Marco Dotti * Giovanni Saligari
Star Player - Fabiano Scirea. Amidst a selection of hard hitters, the subtlety of Scirea, his soft yet precise touch of the leather just are that bit more striking. Fielding him makes the difference between a rugby and a football side and even as he reaches the wrong side of thirty for a fragile player, Scirea remains their very own little diamond.
Let’s start with the positive sides of this club. They’ve got a decent youth academy, cater a sparsely populated bit of the country, hm… What else. Their kit usually manages to make the offensive colour combination of orange and olive bearable? Truly, the list we’ve got here can’t be lengthened. Nottori is the red lantern for three years running and only stays up because no one puts them out of their misery. Every decent youngster seems to flee ‘Il Cavalli’ as soon as a better option comes around and Nottori remains stuck with the second or third category. Their only hope is to reach the point where they’ve embraced their shabbiness and turn it into a marketing ploy.
After the above description, it is futile to sell the line-up as exciting. Still, we must applaud that Nottori usually shies away from parking the bus and still attempts to bring combination football to the pitch. The presence of three Scrugli brothers is not necessarily an asset but does make a quirky mathematical anomaly. The back four is clanky at best, so we must add that goalie Nobile deserves better support, he often saves them from a severe thrashing. They’ve improved in the attack, so there’s a glimmer of hope?
XI - Giacomo Nobile * Francesco Fusco, Angelo Rocchi, Manuele Masini, Lorenzo Scrugli * Dario Nocciolini, Simone Scrugli, Vittorio Scrugli * Davide Trillo, Adelberto D’Ambrosio, Andrea Di Pasquale
Star Player - Davide Trillo. The nomination of ‘Star Player’ might be one step too far but Trillo is the newest talent to drop off the conveyor belt. Fast in the first metres and with quick feet, Trillo could be one of the breakthrough stars of the year. In that case, it might be his only season with this club.
‘The Postmen’ (yes, that is a quirky wordplay over a city once founded as the mail office for the whole region) position themselves in recent years as the only city who could make an attack on the ‘Big Three’ as the end result of years of work. Patience and long-term planning are words rarely heard in San Ortelian football, but Pro Stampano discovered that by doing everything by the book, you could actually build a strong and durable team. Youths get chances, key players kept on board, ambitions are realistic, … You would almost admire the team in blue, almost, if they were not so freaking dull.
This vibe transpires in the line-up as well, a 4-4-2 which usually transpires into a 4-2-2-2 with a solid organisation and a reliable yet unspectacular back four. Opponents often end up struggling to understand why they lost as Cianci nor Santoro are particularly talented but they click well and find one another perfectly. The wingers do add a bit of spice to the overall and their sole form of frivolity comes from the often intricate free kick routines. It’s not special at first sight, but it is damn effective.
XI - Ettore Trasciani * Mattia Arrigoni, Luca Ilari, Roberto Trasciani, Simone Rossi * Daniele Di Francesco, Domenico Cappa, Pietro Bunino, Marco Iotti * Ugo Cianci, Mattia Santoro
Star Player - Marco Iotti. In a line-up which seems nearly military when it comes to executing tasks, Iotti is the sole player given room for some panache by gaffer Caverzasi. Iotti loves to wander from the wing to the halfspaces and confuses the opposition with his speed of execution. A guy for whom you come to the stadium.
In a country where anti-football is less frowned upon then in most places, Robur Astello carved their whole image on being the gritty outsider who is not afraid to be the bad guy. For the outsider, this is often a laughable effort - limited fan base but a remarkable number of lunatics, above average amounts of tattoos and beards and shockingly poor black-and-white shirt design - but in a microcosm such as San Ortelian football, they do stand for something. And it must be added, they give the league that little bit of extra colour when they make a ridiculous complaint to the FA, sing explicit chants on the current hot topic or saw a leg off your favorite midfielder.
You’ve got the numbers right, that’s a back five filled to the brim with cynical butchers (and Maurizi, actually a very decent player) and a group of four in front of them who often skew the line between pressure and downright mob mentality. It’s easy to set it aside as a pathetic attempt to mimic the self-created club persona as they’ve actually incorporated some of the key lessons of modern football: small spaces, chasing the opponent without sacrificing and quick yet efficient counterattacking. They claim it’s an acquired taste and it does bring quite decent results.
XI - Fabio Ferri * Matteo Martorelli, Filippo Maurizi, Sebastiano Lomolino, Michele Giulotti, Emanuele Carletti * Federico Pozzi, Filippo Varoli, Christian Sassi, Jacopo Marcellusi * Romeo Gozzi
Star Player - Romeo Gozzi. Oh, and there’s a single striker. But what a striker he is. There is a decent case to make that he's the best one in the country. On his day, he’s powerful, fast, with a nose for goals and the capacity to store the ball to allow his side to move forth. Unfortunately, he combines it with one of the least likable characters in town and a shady legal track record.
Nine years ago, everything clicked in place for Montelcampo and they managed to grab a title that no one expected to happen yet everyone considered as deserved. Their sole success has become a bit of a stone around their neck as trying to replicate what was, in hindsight, a fluke combined with an off-season for the opposition, placed some unneeded pressure on Sportiva. Queue a few years where players and managers came through revolving doors and the red-and-white appeared desperate for their own identity next to the ‘Big Three’. Ironically, stopping to do so in the last few seasons only has worked to their advantage and the club looks more solid these days.
Manager Oliviero Tumellero played a pivotal role in this transition. An advocate of the 3-4-3, a difficult system to execute, he has invested a lot of time in finding the right profiles and putting everyone in the right place. Pino has a well-honed back three in front of him, Delvino and Buglia are a decent engine and each striker brings in his expected number of goals by the end of the year. Their weakness remains to be consistency as bringing the same quality to the pitch every other game proves to be difficult. If everyone sticks to his tasks, they belong in the Serie A.
XI - Pasquale Pino * Manuele Giannotti, Orlando Castorani, Francesco Sarcinella * Fabio Sparandeo, Leonardo Delvino, Diego Buglia, Ercole Mazzone * Andrea Pambianco, Federico Celli, Alberto Di Cosmo
Star Player - Andrea Pambianco. Starting out as a central midfielder, Pambianco combines technique and versatility with a continuous looming danger to the opposition. When Tumellero moved him to the wing, it seemed a downgrade but he only added a layer of skills to his set. An assurance on goals and a team player.
Off the beaten track, that is the least you can say from the last club to make their way from the amateur ranks to the Serie Nazionale. SSD likes to do things a bit differently than the others and puts a lot of emphasis on fan initiatives, grassroots impulses and generic tomfoolery. It hasn’t really brought in any proper results but they are an enjoyable side to follow if you don’t mind getting the crap beaten out of you on a regular basis. Based in a quarter founded to supply one of the very few major factories in the country, cannery and main sponsor NutriPe, they’re seen as a left-wing club for the worker - not always an admired choice in a generally conservative nation.
Having a manager who is younger than a third of your squad is one of those things others would not do. Diego Chiesa tries to introduce modern techniques to the squad, ranging from primitive data initiatives to group psychology sessions. If it will help them from improving from last year’s penultimate spot remains an open question, nonetheless, as the same eleven will have to make the difference. The 5-3-2 variant is rarely employed and we dare to claim there might be a deeper reason to that. SSD struggle to score goals but we must say that the midfield trio has its value and the Boffeli twins in the back reaches the benchmark. Their goalie is awful.
XI - Leonardo Brignoli * Luca Mangano, Giulio Boffeli, Gianluca Boffeli, Riccardo Ghioldi, Davide Dellavedova * Paolo Castelli, Giorgio Fietta, Lorenzo Spizzichino * Andrea Gatti, Niccolo Galli
Star Player - Paolo Castelli. At 33, Paolo Castelli moved back a row for the third time in his career and seems to have found the right place now to truly excel. Above average feet for the position combined with clever use of space and the physique of a builder make him a stabilising force in a side that often struggles to stay afloat.
If it weren’t for the inexplicable decision to sport a flashy green kit as first, and a deep pink shirt as second outfit, we would dare to consider US San Savola as the grey mouse of the competition. They make the best possible side on a shoestring budget and shy away from the bottom edge of the table, which is all commendable but San Savola never really seems to make a splash. No deep cup run, no remarkable transfer, not even a quirky mascot. They only seem to lighten up when it comes to defending their regional title in San Mamerto which they’ve now kept for six years running. But as San Ma’ is seen as the national laughing stock, with its inhabitants considered a bit more backward and slow than the already deplorable national average, that’s not really a badge of honour.
Oscar Fincato has been at the helm for the club for nineteen years running, a genuine record, so you would not expect much new. The ploy is the same-old flat 4-4-2 yet it deserves to be noticed that with Gagliano, Cadili and Tornaghi, three youngsters have been given the all-clear to make a next step. It makes this side a bit more interesting to follow as the game plan otherwise is fairly straightforward - toss it to the short guy/big lad combination up front and hope they make it work out.
XI - Cesare Giandonato * Daniele Gagliano, Giorgio Biancu, Antonio Cocco, Paolo La Rosa * Bernardo Ladinetti, Nunzio Tornaghi, Riccardo Pisano, Luca Cadili * Samuele Marigu, Christian Valeri
Star Player - Christian Valeri. By our accounts the tallest player in the highest tier, Valeri is a phenomenon in his own right. He is static, clumsy, a gentle giant at first glance but deserves a second scratch to the surface. Pivotal in the tactical plan, he’s hardworking and does lift this team away from the bottom of the ranking.
Congratulations, you’ve made it all the way till the bottom of the preview to discover the side that could actually endanger Catrallo. Virtus Redoccio lifted itself from a decent number three to a true challenger based on choosing a different inroad rather than copying the original. Over the years, they’ve chased that 27-year old consistent back rather than the new gifted kid on the block and it’s a transfer policy that works out nicely for them. The side might be a tad older but makes a solid team that rarely skips a beat. The president of Virtus, theatre owner Paolo Frattini makes an intriguing exception to this image of a hardworking, ‘no sweat no result’ team with his eccentric outfits.
We’re in danger of saying the word ‘solid’ too much in this preview but it’s just a perfect summary for what they’ve got. Evacuo is consistent and strong in the air, the four in front of him know one another well and possess a mean offside trap guided by Mirarchi. Confalonieri polices the midfield, with Fazio as understudy - both loyal club soldiers. This opens up room for creativity of the other four, but none shies away from putting in that extra mile and in the case of Stramaccioni, that extra tackle. The notable hard man has a running record of three teeth chipped off when going for an impossible ball, quite a character.
XI - Serafino Evacuo * Luca Curiale, Rocco Mirarchi, Desiderio Pinna, Paride Risolo * Fabrizio Confalonieri, Marco Fazio, Francesco Bagheria, Emilio Salvatori * Flavio Stramaccioni, Orazio Canova
Star Player - Emilio Salvatori. He doesn’t like the comparison himself, but in every way he is the anti-Del Prete. Modest, shy, yet a treasure on the ball and more often in the box than your regular number ten. It makes him a man with exceptional statistics and much beloved within the squad.