World Cup 86: Roleplay Thread

by **Springmont** » Tue Sep 15, 2020 4:50 pm

Basilsome Athletic FC Post League Report - Part 3

MD13
Hawkamount FC 1–2 Basilsome Athletic FC     @Robbie Dick Workman Stadium (1,294)
[C.S Buchanan  | I. Parax x2]

Hawkamount's ultra-defensive tactics ate themselves up when Basilsome easily tore up their defense with two goals from Igor Parax. Right-back Phil Sunbringer acted like a winger with an overlapping run and perfect cross

MD14
Basilsome Athletic FC 2–2 Joydean FC     @Wilford Street (3,203)
[A. Berryman, B. Meadowmantle  | B. Linwood x2]

Their winning streak got stuck in MD14 when they were only able to draw with Joydean FC in front of their own 3,203 supporters. Young midfielder Brian Meadowmantle was among the scorers that night, his running and dribbling shattered the opponent's defense.

MD15
Ogdenaire Outlaw FC 2–1 Basilsome Athletic FC     @Wexgrove Arena (2,061)
[G. Weststerling, C. Lamb  | R. Summerpeak]

Fate again was not on their side when they lost 1-2 at the hands of Ogdenaire Outlaw FC at the opponent's place. The high pressing tactical applied by Ogdenaire manager Zane Thackeray was indeed feared by other teams, that night The Outlaw players kept the Basilsome players for almost 90 minutes and caused Basilsome not be able to play offensive tactics and short passes as usual.

MD16
Basilsome Athletic FC 1–3 Palmworth FC    @Wilford Street (3,301)
[I. Parax  | V. Roughspire x3]

A red card to goalkeeper Jerrold Watkins early in the game hampered Basilsome's plans to secure the victory. Eventually they lost three points when they were defeated by Palmworth FC 1-3 at home. The match was also marred by several incidents of fights inside and outside the field.

MD17
Penfirth City FC 2–2 Basilsome Athletic FC     @Redbridge Moor (3,629)
[J.D Oliver, A. Cabon  | I. Parax x2]

What stands out in this match is only midfielder Ednar Woodenfang, whose craft helped Parax contribute two goals in this match.

MD18
Basilsome Athletic FC 2–1 Rowanwood FC     @Wilford Street (3,301)
[B. Meadowmantle, I. Parax  | R. Teraa]

Basilsome Athletic was officially crowned Premier League champions when they beat Rowanwood 2-1 with just a goal difference with their closest rival Joydean FC. Each collected 34 points but with an advantage of 17 goals, Basilsome deserves to be crowned champion and also eligible to be promoted to the Super League next season.

This article bought to you by

by **Chromatika** » Tue Sep 15, 2020 5:20 pm

Part 1: The Barbed Inn, Chromia
Part 2: The Emerald, Ming
Part 3: Killjoy, Cortez River
Part 4: Jordan's Talk
Part 5: Islander Dome, Myana
Part 6: Busukuma/Mid-Qual Thoughts Part 7: Triple B, Deprí Sanar

World Cup 86 Qualifying Matchday 12:

Score: Chromatika 4-1 Blouman Empire @ RCK Field, Alnio
Goals: Armageddon ('22), de Aea ('38), Xiao ('49), Andisori, K. ('82)
Starting XI: Ria; Xiao - de Aea - Ken - Ilya; Victoriane - Armageddon (C) - Conrad; Mora; Andisori, K. - Vidal.
Substitutes: Will -> Ken ('57), Dias -> Armageddon ('72), Tioux -> Ria ('83)

World Cup 86 Qualifying Matchday 13:

Score: Free Republic of Hong Kong 4-3 Chromatika
Goals: Conrad ('66), Mora ('71), Sierra ('88)
Starting XI: Tioux; Xiao - de Aea - Ken - Ilya; Victoriane - Armageddon (C) - Conrad; Mora; Andisori, K. - Vidal.
Substitutes: Austic -> Ilya ('55), Thorben -> Victoriane ('63), Sierra- > Vidal ('81)

Now with Video!

She had just finished writing her piece regarding the visit to Alnio while trying to erase the memory of Chromatika's defeat to Free Republic of Hong Kong of all teams.

The way that Chromatika had absolutely trounced Blouman Empire at RCK Field had been beautiful, and Kimi Jin had really enjoyed the company of one Larissa Carson, longtime friend and colleague at The Hill in downtown Alnio. No fewer than two defenders had scored in the match as Chromatika made much out of their set pieces, scoring off of three; everything looked good and golden after the matchday, with the Anomalies holding a five point lead over Blouman Empire.

Then, in the eighty-second minute, Mia Ria had gone down after making a routine save, holding her left hamstring. Ferret Tioux had to come in to close the match, and afterwards, it was disclosed that Ria had a torn hamstring that would sideline her for probably the rest of the qualifying cycle.

"We are hoping she'll be able to return for the World Cup Proper if the team is to qualify or the Cup of Harmony if the team does not," announced Zoe "Z" Benne, the team's physio, after the match.

So, Ferret Tioux became Chromatika's new number one, and the team was noticeably off-pace and sluggish in the first half hour at Free Republic of Hong Kong, a squad that had actually upset Xanneria already this qualifying campaign. Though they staged a fiery comeback in the second half - three goals in twenty-four minutes - the damage was too much, leaving Chromatika at a record of 9-1-3, at 28 points but still only two points ahead of Blouman Empire.

It was going to be a tight finish, as Chromatika's remaining schedule included visits to the Pripet Socialist Republic and Xanneria and a home matches against group leaders and undefeated team Banija, HAIKU, and Tamgu while Blouman Empire still has host Tamgu, play at Banija, host The Gothanita Isles, play at Free Republic of Hong Kong, and host Pripet Socialist Republic. Perhaps the FRHK can make it three for three of upsetting teams ahead of them and hand Blouman Empire another loss; otherwise, the Chromatiks will likely have to count on Banija taking care of business and salvaging a point against them at the Capitalizt Dome.

She was interrupted by a chime from her phone. Was it really that time already?

Getting up, she sent the email to her editor, and jogged out the door.

Fifteen minutes later, she was waiting at the top of a popular pedestrian bridge atop the Cortez River. Moments later, Alisha Forsett arrived, sporting a green dress, fashionable yet looking comfortable.

"Hard to write after a match like that, I'd imagine," the brunette grimaced after giving Kimi a quick hug in greeting, "Thanks for meeting with me."

Kimi nodded, and replied, "Yeah. Especially with Mia's injury. At least there is a lot to write about. I hope the team will bounce back after that and absolutely destroy HAIKU. It's time we handed them some revenge after that draw on the road."

"So... Am I on the clock?" smirked Alisha as the two started walking to a restaurant where she had made reservations. Tonight, the menu was Italian, and she'd made reservations at one of the best - The Golden Apple, a fine dining place overlooking the banks of the Cortez River."

"No, I'm off work," confirmed Kimi, still clad in her press attire. Alisha couldn't help but appraise her figure as they walked. Yep, this was definitely a woman worth looking into.

"You've never told me what you actually do for a living," murmured Kimi, "It's not quite fair with you knowing that I'm a journalist, you know."

"Want to get to know me better, do you?" teased Alisha. To her credit, Kimi didn't make any outward reaction, but she could see a hint of a blush on Kimi's cheeks.

"I'm a bit of a philanthropist," she admitted, "I run a food/clothing center to serve the city's underprivileged while they wait for the government to step in. After the Revolution, the Rainbow Party has done a lot to help the poor, but sometimes, they are short, or it just takes some time for things to arrive. That's when my organization - The Helping Hand - step in."

Kimi stopped and looked at Alisha, her mouth agape.

"It's not that impressive, I'm sure anybody could've done it," downplayed Alisha, "I had thirty thousand dollars in my savings three years ago and realized that there wasn't anything I really wanted more than helping out the people that I saw every day coming home from work. So, I looked into a few things, got permission from then-Chromatik City's Mayor, and started working. In three years, I now run an organization that hires more than a hundred people, and we help up to a hundred thousand people a year."

"Wow. That is amazing," responded Kimi, as the pair neared the restaurant, "I haven't seen an article or anything, have you ever had the press report on it?"

"No," answered Alisha, frowning, "I didn't want to be glorified. It's a team effort and not due to just one person. I couldn't find anyone that I trusted enough to write it fairly."

It was Kimi's turn to smile. "Well, you know one now. Sure, I'm a bit of a sports writer, but I could write the piece for you. And If I couldn't do it justice, I could refer you to other people who can."

Alisha tilted her head, before responding, "Maybe. That depends on how much I grow to trust you. But I'd like that."

Kimi raised an eyebrow, but didn't respond.

As they neared the door, Alisha simply leaned in and took Kimi's arm. She didn't - couldn't - resist.

So, the two walked into the restaurant, thankful for each other's company and looking forward to the conversations in their future...

Team Selection
MD14: vs. HAIKU @ Chromatik City Field, Chromia (Cap. 100,000; 32,200 Seats)
MD15: @ Pripet Socialist Republic
Starting XI: Williams (C); De Saint-Pierre - Friedman - Rondeau - Rowles; Marc - Zuniga - Kuznetsov; Gail; Non - Bird.
Reserves: Alexander, Watt, Baugh, Odling, Nocturne, Humphreys, Kim, M.S., Croix-Pierre, Sterling, Yuan, Andisori, B., Thibodeaux.

by **HUElavia** » Tue Sep 15, 2020 6:25 pm

Highs and Lows puts HUElavia Uneasy with 5 games remaining!

Tioguldos 4–3 HUElavia
(Oroso 4', 21', 67', 79' | Sissoko 10', 18', Conti 70')

Maccian 2–4 HUElavia
(Kizerain 19', 60' | Beaudin 22', 42', Sakaguchi 77', 89')

Another set of matches once again has HUElavia lose one match (at Tioguldos) and win another (at Maccian). The midfield and attack have been great, but the defense is lacking and hemorrhaging goals every other game, giving up 6 goals in these past two matches. As of now, Los Amarillos/Os Amarelos sit in 3rd Place with 24 Points, while Rcecuen leads with 30 and Squornshelous in 2nd Place with 24 Points, being there over the head-to-head sweep. HUElavia will play against Eastfield Lodge next, along with Rcecuen, where the A-Team will start with Lobato in goal for both matches. The country will be hoping and praying for the team to perform well in order to keep pace. The team, along with Coach Garcia Kimura, look to perform well and give a commanding message that they're still in contention to make the World Cup, whether it's through direct qualification or through the playoffs. It's a tough Final 5 matches coming up for the team, but they feel confident that they can make it count and make the most out of this situation.

FORCA HUELAVIA! VAMOS HUELAVIA! GO HUELAVIA!

by **Northwest Kalactin** » Tue Sep 15, 2020 9:41 pm

Kalactin Travel Tips, Part 3
Oh gosh, you guys again! You came back for another shitty episode of this? Well, thanks for inflating my ad revenue anyway, but don’t expect this to be a great one. Today we got so fucking bored in the studio that we have decided to talk about Airports. Yes, Airports. Admittedly, there aren’t a ton of great options here, but we will list the best ones (well, depending on what qualifies as “best”) for you to fly into, might wanna being a bulletproof vest if you plan on going to the baggage claim though.

Best Airports
1. Gold Coast International Airport
Ok, this is the biggest airport in the nation, and has the most flights. It doesn’t have the highest quality, but at least you aren’t at Kempsey. You might want to wait until you get to the hotel to use the bathroom, the bloodstains and gang activity usually tend to scare a few people off, including the police. At Gold Coast you get to go fast through security, like no joke, you can bring a fucking grenade launcher to this place and you can get through. The dining is quite nice though, when you are here, make sure to enjoy the Jones Sports Bar, and while your at it, get yourself a few spicy wings, those things are awesome. What they lack in safety they make up in flight options, as hundreds of planes depart the airport each day.

2. Jarrbergen Municipal Airport
Ok, this is probably the best one in terms of quality. The Jarrbergen Municipalities have actually decided to employ a couple security guards at the airport, so you are a bit safer than at Gold Coast. Just watch out for the people selling $1.99 “Oysters”, I fell for that once, and I spent a few hours barfing up Bull Testes over the toilet. They don’t really have a great selection of flights, but you are able to get to quite a few nations around Calania from around here, and there are many charter flights that depart from here. This is the best place if you want your flight to get delayed, as they didn’t hire anyone to clean up the ice on the runway last spring.

3. Kempsey International Airport
Alright, this is the best airport to go if you wanna get mugged or something like that. You think that Hold Coast had bad security? Kempsey doesn’t even have any. They also never cared to hire anyone to process tickets for the airlines, so you can pretty much get on any flight you want to, just make sure it’s an International one, you don’t wanna know about flying into airports around these parts. Oh yeah, also make sure not to go to any restaurants, the airport doesn’t employ cleaners either. If you go to the bathroom, just keep in mind that the Kempsey Airport Administration will have you sign a waiver to make sure that they aren’t responsible for you accidental injury or death. Anyways, I would stay away from here if I where you.

by **Yue Zhou** » Tue Sep 15, 2020 10:56 pm

Yincheng, Yuezhou - Yincheng National Athletic Complex
One day after the win against Overseas Territories of Sylestone

“I just don’t get it”, Wang Jiahui moaned. “Coach has put me on twice as a substitute, I’ve scored both times, and he still isn’t giving me any play time? Not even against the last-place team in the group? I’m the best striker on the best team in the nation!”

“Look, I’ve put in a good word for you,” Liang Wei offered in reply. “But you know how Yuan Zilai is. He wants to play his system above anything else, and anyone who doesn’t fit just won’t start.”

When Nangang native Chen Huikang had been forced out of his position as assistant manager and replaced with a YFA official, Wang Jiahui had been over the moon. He had hoped that it would lead to a renewed qualifying campaign for the Red Dragons, as well as more playing time for the Yincheng-based players, especially him. But while Yuezhou as a team had surged forwards, winning three of their first four matches to open the second half, Liang Wei had been a disappointment. Wang had found him overflowing with personal ambition, but somewhat lacking in terms of actual football knowledge, and as a result, Liang had failed to connect with Yuan Zilai or many of the team’s star players.

“Well, Wen Xiaohui doesn’t do shit when we’re pressing, but Coach seems to want her to start anyway. He’s even started benching poor Yang Tao for her! Now if I - or Yang Tao, I guess - were playing like shit, I would get it. Really, Liang. But Yang has been solid, I’ve scored every match I’ve played...and he’s still starting her?”

Liang Wei smiled wanly. “Look man, I know you’re mad. But right now, Yuan Zilai won’t listen to either of us. He told me he doesn’t want to be politicized, that he’s trying to distance himself from Ren Qiang’s government.”

“That’s bullsh- he’s starting Wen Xiaohui! The niece of an SNM terrorist and the daughter of a...even worse SNM terrorist! How is that apolitical, but starting the Yincheng boys is political?”

“We need to be patient. Right now, the team doesn’t support you, me, the ‘Yincheng boys’, as you put it. We don’t have the numbers on our side. And if we want to disrupt Yuan Zilai’s hold on the team, then we’ll risk missing out on the World Cup.”

“Well, what can we even do then? He’s poisoni-”

“But if we can get our timing just right, we can force Yuan out and force our way in riiight before the World Cup - or Cup of Harmony, let’s not get too ahead of ourselves - starts. You’re here begging for a start against Overseas Territories of Sylestone when you could be the Yincheng-raised #9 who starts MD1 of the World Cup. A national icon, with a war-torn nation looking to you for unity, for guidance.”

“How are you going to do that?”

“Wang, you can trust me on this. Yuan Zilai thinks he holds all the power right now. But I know exactly how to bring him down.”

Eraman 2–1 Yuezhou
Starting Lineup: Ruo; Kang, Ren, Han, Guo, Qiu (Lin 55); Yang (Wen HT), Chen, Gu (C); Liu, Huang
Goals: Buayan 12, Gangsa 25; Chen 84
MoTM: Han Jian

The Red Dragons played hard and came close to sharing the spoils multiple times, but in the end, they were simply outclassed by an underperforming - but still far more individually talented - Eraman side. In front of a roaring home crowd, Yuezhou struggled to get going early on, as Tun Sengalang Petara gave Mano Bosa free reign to drift wide and the Saputra twins license to overload individual flanks in an attempt to circumvent Yuezhou’s midfield press. Whether it was Petara’s tactics, key mistakes from Red Dragons defenders, or just the individual quality of the Eramanian attack is uncertain, but after just half an hour the home team was up 2-0, first from a thunderous volley off the boot of star striker Buisan Buayan, and then from a well-placed set-piece header from vice-captain Badang Gangsa.

At the half, Yuan Zilai desperately tried to adjust to a 4-3-2-1 by substituting Wen Xiaoli for the underperforming Yang Tao and allowing Guo Xiawei to drift forward more with the ball. The changes led to much better play from Yuezhou, but Eraman were able to sit back and deny the Red Dragons any significant counterattacks. Yuezhou attacked more and more as time wound down, and were able to find a late consolation prize off of a long-range deflected strike from Chen Xiwei, but were ultimately too toothless with possession to take anything but a loss from the match.

Yuezhou 1–0 Overseas Territories of Sylestone
Starting Lineup: Ruo; Kang, Ren (Zhu 63), Han, Qiu (Lin 72); Chen, Guo (Li 50), Gu (C); Liu, Wen; Huang
Goals: Gu 75
MoTM: Gu Zhalei

For seventy-five painful minutes, a Yincheng crowd already reduced by war watched Yuezhou struggle to get the ball past Soccer Goal and into the...soccer goal. Against the Red Dragons, the last-place Overseas Territories of Sylestone were content to sit back and let Yuezhou run around in circles with possession. And for much of the match, despite having the lion’s share of possession and converted shots, Yuezhou walked right into those tactics, only managing one shot on target in the first half despite sixty-four percent of possession. While Gu Zhalei’s late header off of a beautifully-delivered set piece from Wen Xiaohui gave the Red Dragons a crucial win, Overseas Territories of Sylestone’s hard-fought defensive effort was almost very costly.

Lineup to face Graintfjall (5-3-2): Ruo; Kang, Han, Guo, Ren, Zhu; Yang, Gao, Gu (C); Liu, Huang
Lineup to face Nagore (4-3-2-1): Ruo; Kang, Han, Ren, Zhu; Yang, Guo, Gu (C); Liu, Wen; Huang

With just five matches to go, and Yuezhou narrowly clinging on to a playoff spot, every match left is absolutely vital. An away match against fourth-place Graintfjall, who would overtake Yuezhou with a win at Grand National Arena in Háttmark, is an opportunity to solidify their grasp on second place, while dropping points to unheralded Nagore would cripple the Red Dragons’ qualification chances. To that extent, Yuan Zilai will go back to the reliable, sturdy 5-3-2 against Graintfjall, with the substitution of the more versatile, attack-minded Zhu Aiguo for Qiu Hanying, as well as the inclusion of Gao Renling in the starting lineup for just the second time. Against Nagore, Yuan will return to the more attacking 4-3-2-1 and return the mercurial Wen Xiaohui to the fray. Six points in the next two matches would be a huge shot in the arm for the Red Dragons, but Yuan Zilai’s squad can’t afford to take anything for granted.

by **Recuecn** » Tue Sep 15, 2020 11:18 pm

Franky crouched down, his fingertips pressed against the ground, his cleats dug into the dirt behind him. He tensed, frozen. A single drop of the sweat that was pooling on his forehead ran frustratingly down his nose. He longed to brush it away, but he knew that if he moved from his starting position for even a moment, Relié would call him out. What is he waiting for?

The whistle shrilled. "Go go go!" Franky wasn't sure why Relié still felt the need to yell if he was using the whistle, but it was obviously because he was, as always, trying to get in their minds. Franky could feel the searing pain of the lactic acid as he sprinted across the field. How could Relié stand on the sidelines and think this was a mental game?

There was the center line; the turn on the cleats, the desperate race back to the end of the field... "Five seconds," said Relié. "That was nice, boys. Four more like that. Ready, go!" And they were running again like their lives depended on it.

Franky didn't have time to look at or think about his teammates, but glimpses of them slipped into his peripheral vision. Their faces, beet red, sweating, and in pain. Their mouths hanging open as they gasped for as much air as they could. They were having as rough a time as he was, then.

Relié had always been fond of making the team run 'suicides': sets of sprints across the field and back that started short but grew longer and longer as they grew more and more exhausted, with no time to rest in-between. Tremblay probably supported it but let Relié play the bad cop and never called them himself. The team was still getting used to Heissler, but he seemed too nice to do anything so cruel. Relié, on the other hand, seemed to take a sadistic pleasure in the exercise.

Despite that, he had never called a set as hard as the one today. For one thing, they had already done them twice earlier, and they were already exhausted. For another, it was now eleven p.m. and they'd been supposed to return home hours ago. For another, on top of hours of continuous practice just now plus the practice in the morning, they'd just played another qualification game at home. It was supposed to end with a celebration. Instead, it looked like it would be ending with the whole team dying of heatstroke on the pitch, in the middle of the night, two hours after the game.

The game hadn't just been any game: it was the last game against Squornshelous, which had just last match-day taken the second spot in the group, right on Reçueçn's heels. Reçueçn, after a few wins that had looked a lot shakier than their five-zero game against Eastfield Lodge had continued their decline with another draw and needed a good victory to set them back on the right track. Yet when the players had come off the pitch, they had just earned their first defeat of the World Cup cycle.

Relié had let them have it. "You boys think that being top seed means you can just lie there and teams will come by to roll you over and put wins in your pocket. You got cocky, and it shows. When you were the underdogs, you used to train like mad to be as good as the best. Now you think you're the best, and you train for shit. Emergency training session, NOW."

The berating had continued as they'd gotten ready and gotten onto the field. "No scrimmages, no plays to run. You guys could all be Sun Tzu and it wouldn't matter, because until you can get your lazy asses in shape, you can't make even the best play work! That Squornshelous team is literally a bunch of cult members who they chose to play football because no one else in their nation fucking could, and they outran you up and down the pitch for an hour and a half. We're doing fitness exercises because you have some catching up to do. We're going to do this, and it's going to hurt, and it's going to keep hurting until you have caught up. And then we'll do some more. This is day one."

Now here was Franky, who felt as if he was about to die. He swore he had never put this much energy or power into running in his life, and yet it had never felt harder or slower. You won't have a team left at all if you push us much longer, Relié, he thought. But Relié knew exactly where the limit was. Leclair had literally just collapsed to his knees when he blew the whistle and called things for the night.

"But don't forget!" he called, as the players left. "This is day one! We'll be back tomorrow! And this will get harder! Next time we'll leave the stadium so I can make you run up a hill!"

Franky grumbled as he passed Relié on his way out. "If this keeps up, Bonheur, we might fucking kill you one day."

"If this keeps up, Adams, you might win a fucking game one day."

by **Twicetagram and JYPe** » Tue Sep 15, 2020 11:53 pm

Goofy's Hits: Part I
Disclaimer: Don't watch this video if you have intense cringe allergies.
The Video
Lyrics
Pawf Patrod
PAW Patrol, PAW Patrol
We'll be there on the double.
Whenever there's a problem
'Round Adventure Bay,
Ryder and his team of pups
Will come and save the day.
Marshall, Rubble, Chase,
Rocky, Zuma, Skye, Yeah!
They're on the way!

PAW Patrol, PAW Patrol
Whenever you're in trouble
PAW Patrol, PAW Patrol
We'll be there on the double
No job's too big
No pup's too small!
PAW Patrol, we're on a roll!

So here we go
PAW Patrol
Whoa-oh-oh-oh
PAW Patrol
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh
PAW Patrol
barf

Family Gay
[Verse: Me]
It seems today
That all you see
Is violence in movies
And sex on T.V

[Bridge: Me]
But where are those good old-fashioned values....

[Bridge: Me]
On which we used to rely?!

[Chorus: Me]
Lucky there's a family guy!
Lucky there's a man who
Positively can do
All the things that make us...

[Fill: Me]
Laugh and cry!

[Outro: Me]
He's our Fam-ily Guyyy!

My Little Brony
My Little Pony, My Little Pony
Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahhh...

(My Little Pony)

[Me]
I used to wonder what friendship could be
(My Little Pony)
Until you all shared its magic with me

[Me]
Big adventure

[Me]
Tons of fun

[Me]
A beautiful heart

[Me]
Faithful and strong

[Me]
Sharing kindness!

[Me]
It's an easy feat
And magic makes it all complete

You have my little ponies
Do you know you're all my very best friends?

i fcking hate myself

by **The Gothanita Isles** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 1:31 am

Previous RP (Poafmersia - Ch 2 Part 10)
Previous RP (TGI - Ch 2 Part 12)

RP Series: Getting to the top
Chapter 2: A tale of 2 nations
Part 13: Permutations and Combinations (2)

Extracted from The Hallikshire Daily
2 matchdays later, we continue with our series of predicting who is to likely obtain top 2 positions. The second set of groups have had absolutely complicated situations that are not getting better, and we took very long trying to analyse the results as the Matchday 13 results come in. Still, we think some of these groups are really difficult calls, yet we will try our best to post the predictions up. This article was done with support some of our partner newspapers, including the Otksarin Times, the Handorian Sports Journal, and the Sporting Daily from Poafmersia, though those support was in terms of getting the match results, fixture list, and tables. Any form of analysis we conduct is purely by our own reporting team.
Again, before we start, let us set the legends that we will use here. Teams coloured cyan represents teams that have qualified for the World Cup proper. Teams in navy blue have qualified for the Playoffs. Teams coloured brown have qualified for at least the Playoffs, while teams coloured orange can no longer obtain 1st in their group (although they may still qualify automatically as the 6 best runners-up or qualify for the playoffs). Teams in dark green can no longer qualify for the World Cup proper automatically, though they may still qualify for the playoffs, while teams in red are eliminated and can no longer qualify for the World Cup or the playoffs. Below is the legend with the lettering.

We shall start with Group 10, but before we start, here is some statistics which you may be interested in. Currently, the number of teams that have been eliminated has increased to 52 teams, while 7 teams can no longer qualify directly for the World Cup. Only 91 teams can have a chance of qualifying as group winners.

   Group 10                             Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Reçueçn                               13    9   3   1    26    7  +19    30
 2 Squornshelous                         13    8   0   5    27   20   +7    24*
 3 HUElavia                              13    7   3   3    32   19  +13    24*
 4 Tioguldos                             13    6   4   3    29   23   +6    22
 5 Praeceptia                            13    6   2   5    26   30   −4    20
 6 Mathuvan Union                        13    5   2   6    17   19   −2    17
 7 Maccian                               13    5   2   6    19   24   −5    17
 8 Baggieland (Y)                        13    3   4   6    26   27   −1    13
 9 Eastfield Lodge (Z)                   13    3   1   9    11   28  −17    10
10 New Waldensia (E)                     13    1   3   9    13   29  −16     6

*Head-to-head Points: Squornshelous 6, HUElavia 0

Top seeds Reçueçn pull off a 6 point lead at the top of the group. However, the race for second is a really close one - with 2nd seeds HUElavia and 3rd seeds Squornshelous racing for the title. 7th seeds and BOF73 runners-up Tioguldos are just 2 points behind and 8th seeds Praeceptia are a further 2 points adrift in 5th place. Squornshelous' form has been questionable, pulling off 2 wins over HUElavia, and a recent one against Reçueçn, but also lost to sides like Tioguldos away (MD8), Mathuvan Union at home (MD9), and Maccian (MD2 and MD11). HUElavia's form has been more stable, but they have 1 crunch tie against Reçueçn to come. Who would come up tops? I think narrowly, it might be HUElavia, though if Squornshelous gets a more stable set of results against the remaining opponents, they can come back on top.
Key Battles: Reçueçn vs HUElavia (MD15); Squornshelous vs Tioguldos (MD17); Tioguldos vs Reçueçn (MD18)

   Group 11                             Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Mriin                                 13    9   4   0    35   20  +15    31
 2 TJUN-ia                               13    7   3   3    30   21   +9    24
 3 Tikariot                              13    7   2   4    28   22   +6    23
 4 Port Ember                            13    4   7   2    17   13   +4    19
 5 South Newlandia                       13    4   6   3    20   18   +2    18
 6 Natanians and Nosts                   13    5   2   6    29   26   +3    17
 7 Union Europae (Y)                     13    4   3   6    14   24  −10    15
 8 Filindostan (Z)                       13    3   3   7    18   20   −2    12
 9 Southern Palm Islands (Z)             13    2   4   7    20   28   −8    10
10 Se Vende Skooma (E)                   13    1   4   8    11   30  −19     7

Mriin is surely running away with the group right now, and second seeds Port Ember's poor early run doesn't look like recovering soon. I mean, their performance thus far was DDLLDWDDWDWWD. Maybe they could cruise back up, but we are looking at 4th seeds TJUN-ia and 7th seeds Tikariot and thinking, "hmm maybe not". TJUN-ia has taken 4 points against Port Ember, with Tikariot playing Port Ember away in Matchday 14. Our bets are on Mriin to be group champions. Comparatively, TJUN-ia has a slightly easier run-in, only playing Mriin and a bunch of lower-ranked teams. Tikariot, on the other hand, has trips to Port Ember and Filindostan, and even though Tikariot did well the first time, those trips are really tricky. It may rest on the Matchday 18 meeting between both teams. Even though TJUN-ia narrowly lost at home in the first time, we are calling for TJUN-ia to steal the cake in 2nd place.
Key Battles: Port Ember vs Tikariot (MD14); TJUN-ia vs Mriin, Filindostan vs Tikariot (MD15); Mriin vs Port Ember (MD17); Tikariot vs TJUN-ia (MD18)

   Group 12                             Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Trolleborg                            13    9   3   1    34   20  +14    30
 2 The Hinodejin Empire                  13    9   2   2    30   14  +16    29
 3 Taeshan                               13    7   4   2    24   16   +8    25
 4 Riena                                 13    6   3   4    26   22   +4    21
 5 Ziwana                                13    6   1   6    23   18   +5    19
 6 Springmont                            13    4   4   5    24   27   −3    16
 7 ZSeparatists (E)                      13    4   1   8    15   24   −9    13*
 8 Savigliane (E)                        13    4   1   8    25   35  −10    13*
 9 Fluvannia (E)                         13    2   3   8    13   25  −12     9
10 The Grearish Union (E)                13    2   2   9    12   25  −13     8 

*Head-to-head Points: ZSeparatists 3, Savigliane 0

Baptism of Fire 71 Champions Trolleborg produced a shock result against Taeshan by winning away in Matchday 12, and suddenly Trolleborg is leading The Hindoejin Empire again. We are thinking that maybe they would not qualify as group champions, but at least they would qualify as group runners-up. Can Taeshan produce results to catch-up? Trolleborg only lost to The Hinodejin Empire, while The Hinodejin Empire had shock defeats against Riena and Ziwana. I think Taeshan might just lose out this time, with The Hindoejin Empire getting tops and Trolleborg barely getting second, and with enough points to qualify automatically.
Key Battles: Riena vs The Hindoejin Empire (MD14); Ziwana vs Taeshan (MD15); Taeshan vs The Hindoejin Empire (MD16); Riena vs Taeshan (MD17); Trolleborg vs The Hindoejin Empire (MD18)

   Group 13                             Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Kelssek                               13    9   1   3    31   14  +17    28
 2 Equestria                             13    7   5   1    34   17  +17    26
 3 Geektopia                             13    7   4   2    39   25  +14    25
 4 Oberour Ar Moro                       13    5   5   3    31   26   +5    20
 5 Sultanate of Oontaz                   13    4   6   3    14   16   −2    18
 6 Indusse                               13    3   8   2    26   23   +3    17
 7 Libonesia                             13    3   5   5    16   22   −6    14
 8 Kohnhead (E)                          13    2   4   7    18   31  −13    10
 9 Woryand (E)                           13    2   3   8    24   42  −18     9
10 Bostopia (E)                          13    1   3   9    28   45  −17     6

Kelssek, Equestria, Geektopia. A weird order of the top 3 seeds, but it may be partially due to the World Cup 83 champions Equestria not being as strong as they were 6 years ago. Kelssek takes a well deserved lead at the top, but the actually order of teams may be too close to call with teams in different runs. Kelssek only has to play 3rd seeds Geektopia and a bunch of weaker teams, while's Equestria hardest matches may be against Oberour Ar Moro and Geektopia. Which means Geektopia has to pull off 2 shocks to get to 2nd place - they did against Kelssek but not Equestria. Geektopia has the hardest run-in, and maybe they will just barely fall short this time. Calling on Kelssek to take first place and Equestria to take runners-up.
Key Battles: Geektopia vs Equestria (MD16); Kelssek vs Geektopia (MD17)

   Group 14                             Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Farfadillis                           13    9   2   2    44   22  +22    29
 2 Yuezhou                               13    8   2   3    28   21   +7    26
 3 Plane of Possibility                  13    8   1   4    30   23   +7    25
 4 Graintfjall                           13    7   3   3    16    8   +8    24
 5 Sarzonia                              13    6   2   5    25   19   +6    20
 6 Eraman                                13    5   3   5    33   29   +4    18
 7 Nagore                                13    4   4   5    19   24   −5    16
 8 Northwest Kalactin (Z)                13    3   2   8    24   39  −15    11
 9 Alba and Cymru (E)                    13    2   4   7    16   29  −13    10
10 Overseas Territories of Sylestone (E) 13    0   3  10    11   32  −21     3

World Cup 84 champions Farfadillis' early unbeaten run has just exploded, and now they are met with 3 teams between 3 and 5 points behind them. That is...scary. When we previewed about difficult groups to predict, this is one of those that steals the cake outright. 2nd seeds Sarzonia and 3rd seeds Eraman are languishing 6 and 8 points behind the 2nd position, and 4th seeds Northwest Kalactin had an early bath with only 11 points from 13 games. One of Yuezhou, Plane of Possibility, or Graintfjall is going to qualify for sure - maybe two. The question here is, who would it be? Yuezhou and Graintfjall's first cycle has ended in such good results for them, while Plane of Possibility only came in during the 71st Baptism of Fire, now are 5th seeds after two cycles below average, and then, bam now they are in 3rd. We had to check the run-ins to do anything prediction for this, and we got them below:

We can't see how Farfadillis can lose top spot, and we think that maybe Graintfjall can get second simply because they get an easy run-in. It wasn't an unanimous decision among the team, and honestly, the sporting team was quite divided over who will take this spot. We don't really know what can happen, and really, any of these 4 teams can get that 2 spots.
Key Battles: too many, see spoiler for matches in italics

   Group 15                             Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Cassadaigua                           13   10   2   1    43   22  +21    32
 2 Quebec                                13    9   1   3    37   26  +11    28
 3 Squidroidia                           13    8   1   4    30   23   +7    25
 4 Main Nation Ministry                  13    7   3   3    24   16   +8    24
 5 Electrum                              13    6   1   6    29   31   −2    19
 6 Devonta                               13    5   2   6    22   22    0    17*
 7 Flavovespia                           13    5   2   6    25   21   +4    17*
 8 Wymondham (Y)                         13    4   1   8    11   18   −7    13
 9 Ihilthracna (E)                       13    3   1   9    21   37  −16    10
10 Kulefati (E)                          13    0   2  11    10   36  −26     2

*Head-to-head Points: Devonta 3, Flavovespia 0

Group of death being group of death, it seems that the gap here has slightly widened a bit. Top seeds Cassadaigua are likely to keep their top place, but the second place spot is wide open with Quebec, Squidroidia, and Main Nation Ministry all in the race. We aren't sure. Squidroidia are the reigning bronze medallists of the Independent Associations' Cup, as well as the bronze medallists at the latest Baptism of Fire. Quebec have formerly participated in the World Cup and reached all the way to the 3rd/4th playoffs before. We are giving Quebec the slight edge here.
Key Battles: Squidroidia vs Quebec (MD14); Cassadaigua vs Main Nation Ministry (MD15)

   Group 16                             Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Starblaydia                           13   11   2   0    43   17  +26    35
 2 Darmen                                13    8   0   5    32   27   +5    24*
 3 The Jovannic                          13    7   3   3    26   20   +6    24*
 4 Mattijana (Y)                         13    5   3   5    14   15   −1    18**
 5 Rangers FC (Y)                        13    5   3   5    17   18   −1    18**
 6 Krytenia (Y)                          13    5   3   5    23   26   −3    18**
 7 Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom (Y)         13    4   2   7    22   23   −1    14
 8 Saltstead (Y)                         13    3   4   6     6   11   −5    13
 9 Sulsuland (Z)                         13    3   3   7    20   31  −11    12
10 Cheetahs and Reptiles Coalison (E)    13    1   3   9     6   21  −15     6

*Head-to-head Points: Darmen 3, The Jovannic 0
**Head-to-head Points: Mattijana 7, Rangers FC 4, Krytenia 3

Step aside Group 15, this is the true Group of Death. Apart from AOCAF champions Starblaydia dominating at the top, there is a huge congestion in the middle. Yes, it may have gotten down to Darmen vs The Jovannic, but everyone else are so close to each other that they can easily throw a spanner in the works. 2nd seeds Darmen are attempting to shrug off 6th seeds and surprise dark horses The Jovannic, ahead of more prominent sides like Mattijana, Krytenia and Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom. Darmen's road to runners-up may be easier, but there are lots of potential mines on their path. Still, we think that apart from obvious group champions Starblaydia, Darmen should get the runners-up position. Is it easy? No. Will they get there? We give you the standard answer - 6/4 split, we give Darmen 6, give The Jovannic 4.
Key Battles: Darmen vs Rangers FC, Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom vs The Jovannic (MD14); Darmen vs The Jovannic (MD16); The Jovannic vs Starblaydia, Mattijana vs Darmen (MD17); Rangers FC vs The Jovannic (MD18)

   Group 17                                Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Zwangzug                                 13   10   1   2    23   12  +11    31
 2 Abanhfleft                               13    7   2   4    33   25   +8    23
 3 South Covello                            13    5   6   2    13   10   +3    21*
 4 Squornshelan Remnant States              13    5   6   2    19   14   +5    21*
 5 When U Die                               13    5   5   3    20   17   +3    20
 6 Barunia                                  13    4   5   4    21   18   +3    17
 7 Legalese                                 13    4   4   5    18   18    0    16
 8 Eurasies (Y)                             13    4   2   7    18   28  −10    14
 9 Liberal Democratic Socialist States (Z)  13    2   4   7    12   22  −10    10
10 Verceola (E)                             13    0   3  10     7   20  −13     3

*Head-to-head Points: South Covello 4, Squornshelan Remnant States 1

If Group 16 is the place full of mines, Group 17 is where you get zugzwanged by Zwangzug. (You are welcome.) The losses just keep coming and coming, and South Covello, after failing to qualify last cycle, may miss out once again with Abanhfleft and Squornshelan Remnant States likely taking their place. Surprise packages When U Die got an early run, but they are unlikely to keep it up based on the way they are doing. We think that Abanahfleft might just be able to pull it off this time to get runners-up behind Zwangzug, but mark our words - it won't be easy.
Key Battles: South Covello vs Zwangzug (MD14); South Covello vs Abanhfleft (MD15); When U Die vs South Covello (MD16); When U Die vs Abanhfleft (MD17); Abanhfleft vs Squornshelan Remnant States (MD18)

   Group 18                                Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
 1 Savojarna                             13   11   1   1    34   14  +20    34
 2 Baker Park                            13   10   1   2    41   16  +25    31
 3 Mercedini                             13    9   1   3    23   13  +10    28
 4 Cheergirls                            13    6   2   5    14   14    0    20
 5 Twicetagria (Y)                       13    5   3   5    15   16   −1    18
 6 Busoga Islands (E)                    13    4   3   6    12   15   −3    15
 7 Orion Islands (E)                     13    4   2   7    20   28   −8    14
 8 Murphtannia (E)                       13    3   4   6    19   25   −6    13
 9 West Angola (E)                       13    1   4   8    16   31  −15     7
10 TOTEL (E)                             13    1   1  11    13   35  −22     4

The group gave up in a more unexpected manner than we thought they would. It is now Savojarna, Baker Park, and Mercedini now left to their gadgets and see who would blink first. Although we put our money on Baker Park getting first and Mercedini getting second at first, it seems like Savojarna may steal a surprise. Especially since they might defeat Mercedini yet again. We think it might be safer putting it as Baker Park first and Mercedini second. But we may be wrong. We aren't sure.
Key Battles: Savojarna vs Baker Park (MD14); Mercedini vs Savojarna (MD17)

The Gothanita Isles 0

Banija 4
Ugonna 16', 82'; Uster 36'; Ogunsola 60'

Starting 11: Thulile Bolkvadze; Jeanette Ross, Den Benjaminson, Adolf Stenger, Charlee Harel; Sardar Chaplin; Grigorii McCrory, Vladan Bloxam; Ladislava Tyler; Abdelkader Kartal, Salwah Sadık
Substitutes: Cyneburga London (Bloxam 60'); Gerhard Abraham (Harel 72'); Saif al-Din Kartal (Stenger 79')

The Gothanita Isles 0

Chromatika 4
Kelly 4'; Dragana 29'; Sierra 63'; Bird 90'

Starting 11: Thulile Bolkvadze; Jeanette Ross, Den Benjaminson, Adolf Stenger, Charlee Harel; Sardar Chaplin; Stefanie Salzwedel, Cyneburga London; Chloe Brewster; Abdelkader Kartal, Salwah Sadık
Substitues: Ayokunle Christian (Ross 58'); Marino Barros (Sadık 67'); Ladislava Tyler (Salzwedel 75')

Free Republic of Hong Kong 0

The Gothanita Isles 0

Starting 11: Celsus Becket; Ayokunle Christian, Den Benjaminson, Adolf Stenger, Gerhard Abraham; Ladislava Tyler, Remus McQueen, Chloe Brewster; Lola Katona, Abdelkader Kartal, Adelia Kelly
Substitutes: Grigorii McCrory (Katona 66'); Cyneburga London (Kelly 78')

The Gothanita Isles 0

Pripet Socialist Republic 0

Starting 11: Thulile Bolkvadze; Ayokunle Christian, Abu Bakr Ekmekçi, Saif al-Din Kartal, Gerhard Abraham; Ladislava Tyler, Remus McQueen, Chloe Brewster; Grigorii McCrory, Salwah Sadık, Cyneburga London
Substitutes: Amalija Bothe (Sadık 70')

by **Ko-oren** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 2:00 am

Quiet Times

The flurry of goals has fallen quiet in recent games. From 18 in our first 9 games (2 goals per game) to a loss versus Jeruselem and two minuscule 1-0 wins over Netop and Quebecois Acadiana, it seems the team has lost a bit of its fire. It turns out it has little to do with the players involved: the stikers still convert the same percentage of shots on goal into goals, but they have slightly less to work with. Most importantly, Juliasterinthen played around with the starting eleven, mixing and matching, finding new opportunities for future games, and giving young talent more experience for when they'll have to carry the team.

Versus Netop, Juliasterinthen ran a conservative back line with Hergulauthen and Grootenhuis on the left and right wing. Hergulauthen is a classic Daltonesque wing back as far as Ko-orenite legends are concerned: rarely in possession but rarely caught making mistakes either. Hard to say if they add to or detract from the overall team performance, but at least they handle their defensive responsibilities well. Grootenhuis, on the other side, never played alongside Dalton, yet played a similar game. That is, until he was told to crawl out of his shell and play like he would at Darmen's IFK Liverpool United a bit more, where he's involved in the passing game on some occasions. In the centre, Arceneaux started, celebrating a move to a club in Tikariot. Van Schelven was named captain for the day, and the third centreback was Parrott, easily the most adventurous of the three (or five). This had its consequences for the rest of the team, obviously.

Midfield saw a 100% turnover: Magrath took over for Yokota at defensive midfielder, and Batchelor and yChibwod played alongside one another on the wing. Ensaunden and Miyahara were the striker duo, with Ensaunden dropping back a bit. Miyahara made his debut - and it wasn't a particularly memorable one, unfortunately. Magrath also started for the first time, after making several late substitution appearances. Ensaunden has also played under 5 games for the national team. Between the three of them, they were left to figure out how to run the offensive side of the team, with all experienced forces on the bench - Batchelor and yChibwod aren't necessarily inexperienced, but they're not regular starters either. It had a huge impact in the build-up, where both wingers were hard to find - they're not in the same place as the central and attacking midfielders. Once this hurdle was taken, play flowed much better, but still suffered from a few stupid mistakes (including 11! passes at, and over, the touch line without anyone else even near the intended location).

Against Quebecois Acadiana, several other players were given the nod: in defence, Ardouin started with Lampshire and Mizuno in central defence, while the midfield consisted of a somewhat unorthodox combination of Yokota, Janoreirinten, and Lalaseringun - marking the first time Longchambon wasn't starting in several cycles - to give the star attacking midfielder some rest after receiving a few knocks in a few earlier games. As strikers, Ensaunden was given another shot, this time together with Duchemin. Duchemin made his first appearance of the cycle, just his fourth appearance since moving to Nephara's Starling. Not that Duchemin suffered a drop in form, but Noya noted slightly better statistics since his move, and that's eventually what the selectors like in strikers. Defenders get entire files. Strikers get a few notes on goals, shots on goal, and xG if that. Moving away from trouble finding wingers on the, well, wing, this match reverted back to the regular formation. The difference was night-and-day: from the very first minute, combinations, passes, position play all clicked, and the team ran circles around the QA. It didn't translate to goals, but that might have to do with the people involved. Not everything is solvable by strategy, as much as we'd like to believe so.

On the one hand, this means that Juliasterinthen is slowly getting a much larger group of players together that understand what it's like to wear the yellow sash. On the other, it's taken away some of the work that the starting XI had done to string together win after win in the first part of qualification. One constant remains, and that's Palmgroen on goal. During all of Juliasterinthen's tenure, he has never replaced a goalkeeper in the middle of a campaign, except during particularly bad spells. Palmgroen had his own distractions though, negotiating a move to a club in Tikariot in the middle of it all. Not a good look, and while the head coach was pressured on Palmgroen's decisions whenever a journalist could get a shout in, it hasn't impacted his play. At all.

In fact, the Dragonflies are still in the middle of a historic campaign, defence-wise. From 180 teams, only Hampton Island have conceded fewer goals: 3. We are sitting on 4, and Ethane is the only other team to come close (coincidentally, they're also from Hampton Island's group). Even more interestingly, both of them aren't leading that group - that would be Brenecia.

Going forward, only five games remain. Seeing as the Dragonflies have a 9-point lead, two wins in the rest of the campaign should see us go to a fourth straight World Cup, tying the record of the late 60s-early 70s, when the Green and Blue also qualified four consecutive times, from the 69th up to the 72nd edition. Never count your chickens before they hatch, but the team is in a better position than any other at this stage (outside of Nephara, who have a 15-point cushion, the Holy Empire, who are sitting 11 points over Poafmersia, or Banija, who are also 11 points over Chromatika - not very surprising, but these are the last remaining 13-0-0 teams). Starblaydia is the one other team with a better position, who are in a group where everyone can beat up everyone else. They have 11 points over the 8-0-5 Darmeni, in a group featuring the Jovannic, Mattijana, Rangers FC, Krytenia, Zeta Reka, and Saltstead, just to name a few well-known faces. Yes, that's almost the entire group.

@ Semarland
v Tequilo (Surbourneshire Square, Greencaster)
@ 95X
v Iles Rogieres (Spider Stadium, Alara)
@ Sajnur (National Stadium, Javoser)

At this point, Tequilo can get as many as 42 points, and 95X can get up to 39. Tequilo are our main target, and our final home fixture versus them will likely decide the fate of the group - as in, it should be the final nail in the coffin. A win there puts them at a max of 39 points... and we are on 36 right now. Therefore, a victory over Los Pitxileros should be enough.

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 5:36 am

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independents sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Football Fallacies
with Graham O'Doherty

GOODBYE FIRST PLACE, IT'S BEEN NICE KNOWING YOU

I guess it says something about your team when you become consistently inconsistent. As for what that something is, I cannot tell for the life of me. Hello guys, and welcome back to another edition of The Football Fallacies with me, your gay Irishman Graham O'Doherty. Yes, this is it. Cue the dancing pallbearers and the catchy EDM tune. Abanhfleft's hopes and dreams of recapturing first place in Group 17 are well and truly dead. It's gone, Jim. No going back now that it's properly dead. Thank you Zwangzug for delivering the killing blow. Spared us the trouble of doing it ourselves, although in a way, we certainly did.

Well, I certainly predicted that something like this was going to happen, didn't I? I said that there's no way that we would be able to sustain the momentum we got in the first half of qualifying despite all of my hopes and prayers. And I was right. I'm not really sure who to point the finger on though, if it should be West Squornshelous or Legalese who should get the blame for reminding our girls that they are never ever going to matter in the wider world of football. I mean, they probably hear that all the time from fans like me but it certainly probably hits a little bit different when they get told such by a team that, you know, actually knows what they're doing?

No two ways about it, anything else coming after that absolute battering of Eurasies was always going to be a disappointment no matter the result. Fuck it, even if we had won against the Lib Dem Soc States by 5 goals to nil (and we didn't, by the way, just saying), we would probably have walked away from that game thinking "yeah, we could do better". Which we have, given that we have managed to score 8 goals (eight!) in one single bloody game. In any case, the Lib Dem Soc States have one of the most defensively oriented teams I have ever seen in my life. Part of me wonders if their coach has been taught in the ways of Gaëtano Bernardeschi. I mean seriously, how did this country even manage to get all the way here playing such dire and shite football? Well, granted it's got them a fair few results (kind of like Bernardeschi in the league all those years ago to be fair), but come on! You're trying to get to the biggest stage the footballing world has ever seen! Try to look a little more inspired when you're playing and a little less like Selim Tiryaki over in Releinthi when he's told to sit down on the bench. Christ above! That man had one good Baptism of Fire with Pridnestrovia and he absolutely nicked a living from the Gunners and even had the audacity to say "You're welcome!" to Arsenal de Releinthi come his retirement.

Sorry for drifting off topic there for a bit. But can you blame me? There's not much to talk about the game against the Lib Dem Soc States. It's just ninety minutes of eleven girls trying to break down a perfectly executed low block before saying "sod it" and taking a page out of their opponents' book by scoring a set piece goal. Take a bow, Queen Yarnall, for rising above the rest (literally; she's what, just 5 foot 7 in a game where the average height was 5 feet 10?) to smash home the ball with more conviction than Harrison Tabatinga got when the RBI finally caught up to him. YAS QUEEN! (Oh, I actually hate that phrase, but I also couldn't help myself...)

And then came Zwangzug. Christ above, Zwangzug. Where the fuck did you come from, mate? Like, seriously. There Abanhfleft was, toodling along thinking they've got first place in the group in the bag because the goddess of sports, some bitch named Margaret or whatever, had let them win a chunk of their game in the first half of quali, and then suddenly there's Zwangzug with the FNLAF-style tackle and the good old "the future is now, old man!" Yep. Absolutely played us out of the park that time. No luck, no good fortune, just pure unadulterated commitment to a game plan. Zwangzug made us play their game, which kind of suggests that we had a game of our own to begin with, which in all honesty we probably did, but it got thrown out the window as soon as soon as bloody Johan Idmar scored. At that point, Ginny Katesmar was most probably like, "Yep, these guys obviously know football much better than I do. Let's go play their game instead of sticking to ours!" Christ above! It's a wonder you're still manager of the women's team! Then again, I don't think there's a queue forming at the job center to take her place. Everyone's seen how it feels to be Abanhfleft manager, and I don't blame them for not wanting to take the job. Christ, you'd probably have to be not right in the head if your ambition is to be Abanhfleft manager. You'd have to be a right sadomasochist to want this particular job given how easy it is to both inflict and receive pain while doing it.

Well, that does it for this edition of The Football Fallacies. Next international break we're up against Verceola and South Covello. Good God, if we don't get anything but maximum points from Verceola, the absolute worst team in our group and literally one of the worst teams in the whole of the qualifiers, then we are officially bottlers. If we lose or even draw against Verceola next month, might as well kiss the World Cup goodbye because after that, there is literally no hope for us. We're never going back to the World Cup for as long as I live. XOXO from Graham....

     ABANHFLEFT 1 - 0 LIB. DEM. SOCIALIST STATES
YARNALL (90+1')

              ZWANGZUG 2 - 1 ABANHFLEFT
            IDMAR (8')       KELLERMAN (55')
CHERENKOV–NGUYEN (80')

by **PotatoFarmers** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 6:37 am

Previous RP (Poafmersia - Ch 2 Part 10)
Previous RP (TGI - Ch 2 Part 13)

RP Series: Getting to the top
Chapter 2: A tale of 2 nations
Part 14: Beautiful Mess

As the final whistle blew against Southwest Eastnorth, Adnan Suliaha sighed. His team had just gotten a draw against weaker opponents, and this will definitely give Audioslavia a chance to catch up, in his opinion. However, the fans were cheering instead. It appears that the Bulls had also gotten a draw against Euran Oceania Territories, and that has allowed Poafmersia keep that 0.5 point advantage over Audioslavia, keeping their own fate in their own hands.
These 2 weeks has been really painful. For Poafmersia, they have suddenly been thrust into the limelight after defeating Audioslavia once again, giving them the driver's seat on the race to the finish. Even as they narrowly got a defeat against The Holy Empire at their own home, they were relieved to hold the advantage over Audioslavia. However, that doesn't feel safe at all. Adnan and Katiri had aimed to rotate the players in such a way where the players could maximise rest, and yet all the points could be swept up so that they could get into the top 6 among 18 runners-ups, and avoid the dreaded playoffs.
For captain Danzik Hoboson, the run felt like a roller coaster. As they put in a performance after performance, they were just thinking of getting as many good results as possible. The goal was on the wall - to qualify for the World Cup in 5 cycles, and after the experience of the first 2, they came into this cycle and this group thinking top 3 must be the target. What came after that was just flash. As the footballing world shakes up following the previous world champions' dissolution, pecking orders are being changed. The top teams are being taken out of line, as young upstarts are here to fight for a place in the World Cup. TJUN-ia and Tikariot are fighting to keep 2nd place ahead of Port Ember in Group 11; Trolleborg, the champions of our Baptism of Fire in 1st place in Group 12; at least one of Yuezhou, Plane of Possibility, Graintfjall qualifying in Group 14. These are just various examples of recently-established teams outside the top 2 pots are trying to get their hands on World Cup glory. Danzik Hoboson has previously announced that this was his last qualification cycle, and he intended to tribute this last cycle to ensuring that Poafmersia gets another trophy. The IAC 10 trophy in the bag, he hoped that maybe they could get the Cup of Harmony trophy, or defend the IAC trophy successfully. Or maybe, get into the World Cup.
After the performances of the last few days, he realises that this might his perfect parting gift. Or maybe this entire run would convince him that he still remains relevant and could play a role in the next qualification cycle. After all, no matter what everyone else says, he still has nothing to lose. Fail to qualify for the World Cup, and they are still in good shape for the Cup of Harmony. Qualify for the World Cup, and Danzik will go down in history as the first captain to bring the team to the World Cup. Of course, anything and everything is possible. They have came together to fight off Southwest Eastnorth's attacking strategy to come back 3-3 and steal a point. They have done well to defend against The Holy Empire, who seems to have extraordinary strength in their home match in some Dream Realm. They stood firm against the dirty tactics of Sylestone, especially that nonsense where the Fridge kept the ball to prevent itself from being tackled. Best of all, they have gotten 2 wins against Audioslavia. 2 wins.
After the match against Audioslavia, Danzik Hoboson was in tears. Talking to reporters after the match, he said, "For the first time, it felt that we are within step of the World Cup. Everyone had laboured really hard so as to grab all 3 points, and our perseverance had finally paid off. This 3 points was well deserved in my opinion, and without the strong team work we had shown today, and the fans constantly being there to support the team, we have put in performance after performance. Now everything is in our hands, 2 days later, we will travel to The Holy Empire, with a small group of die-hard fans, and we will put in a strong performance to show that we are deserving of our position."
Some say that for newcomers like Poafmersia, the water is too deep, and it is too difficult to breath and survive in this top-heavy atmosphere. Pundits always claim that it is impossible for teams to climb up. However, this cycle has proven one thing - in this beautiful mess, there is always something untouchable. For the Red Panjias, it is our attitude and spirit.

Poafmersia 1
Pete Carisa 85' (Assist by Hansel Tang)

Audioslavia 0

Starting 11: Sandi Jaliaha; Alex Hoboson, Danzik Hoboson (c), Nasri Sanchez; Dargis Walshor, Arnold Shwentin, Gisiik Moonar, Whitney Rios; Hansel Tang, Shakira Handris, Pete Carisa
Substitues: Donk Mason (Moonar 63'); Joel Haodao (Handris 77'); Clara Brivio (A. Hoboson 85')

The Holy Empire 3
Alán Belmores 18', 70'; Alexander Ceraluso 43'

Poafmersia 2
Shakira Handris 60' (Assist by Gisiik Moonar); Pete Carisa 86'

Starting 11: Sandi Jaliaha; Alex Hoboson, Danzik Hoboson (c), Nasri Sanchez; Dargis Walshor, Arnold Shwentin, Gisiik Moonar, Whitney Rios; Hansel Tang, Shakira Handris, Pete Carisa
Substitues: Pasits Rikachz (Sanchez 54'); Daas Taisg (Shwentin 67'); Hollis Stephenson (A. Hoboson 78')

Poafmersia 3
Makana Tuft 30' (Assist by Daas Taisg), 80' (Assist by Pete Carisa); Danzik Hoboson 64'

Southwest Eastnorth 3
Chris Houton 12'; Mark Martz-Marx 45+1'; Leigh Bourne 58'

Starting 11: Sandi Jaliaha; Pasits Rikachz, Danzik Hoboson (c), Simone Gori; Emma Conner, Donk Mason, Daas Taisg, Josef Gentry; Joel Haodao, Makana Tuft, Pete Carisa
Substitutes: Nero Wood (Taisg 69')

Poafmersia 2
Aubrey Mayer 14' (Assisted by Tuft); Ariel Casey 89'

Sylestone 1
Fridge 53'

Starting 11: Sandi Jaliaha; Ariel Casey, Pasits Rikachz, Danzik Hoboson (c), Natalia Abbott; Donk Mason, Woden Sweet, Nero Wood; Joel Haodao, Makana Tuft, Aubrey Mayer
Substitutes: Emma Conner (Haodao 75')

by **The Jovannic** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 8:08 am

Clinical Emperors score 4 to sink rivals Mattijana

At a stage of the WCQ where dropping points could mean elimination from world cup playoff contention, The Jovannic did not upset, coming up with a splendid victory to continue our run into the playoffs. Gothal Mathee played the usual 4-2-4 formation, which worked well against Mattijana. Juyt Dersa scored the first goal. A relief for him after a recent goal drought. Jovan Ilohil blasted in one just mere minutes later, with some mesmerising play breaking down the opposition defence. The Jovannic maintained dominance and scored a third soon after, currently in form midfielder Viszier Felon combined with Jin Tze nicely to score his 3rd goal in as many matches. Gothal Mathee was shown a yellow card for running on the pitch and excessively celebrating, but even that could not stop The Jovannic's blistering form. 3-0 was the score at half time. The Jovannic relaxed their pressure in the second half, and the Mattijanan team managed to get back into the game, with them getting chances and pushing hard against the Jovannic Defence. They managed to score once, with Mavin Tsuniki having no chance to get to the ball. The Jovannic responded with another dynamic attack, and subsitute Ianu Fathe finishing off another beautiful play. Mattijana got a late consolation but it was not enough as The Jovannic charged towards their first playoff spot. "We've already surpassed expectations. We just have to finish the job. Each game will be important. A draw could spell the end of us. We are not afraid to win dirty." Gothal Mathee said after the match.

Next are important matches, we have to win.

by **Savojarna** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 8:26 am

SavojarSports.sj - inside reports from all Savojarna
Savojarna prepare for decisive home match

By Jaukka Halanen

World Cup 86 Qualification - Group 18
Calendar:
Week 1: Savojarna 5-2 West Angola / Savojarna 2-1 Busoga Islands
Week 2: Twicetagria 0-0 Savojarna / Savojarna 5-3 Orion Islands
Week 3: Baker Park 3-2 Savojarna / Savojarna 5-2 TOTEL
Week 4: Cheergirls 0-1 Savojarna / Savojarna 1-0 Mercedini
Week 5: Murphtannia 0-2 Savojarna
Week 6: West Angola 2-4 Savojarna / Busoga Islands 0-1 Savojarna
Week 7: Savojarna 1-0 Twicetagria / Orion Islands 1-5 Savojarna
Week 8: Savojarna vs. Baker Park / TOTEL vs. Savojarna
Week 9: Savojarna vs. Cheergirls / Mercedini vs. Savojarna
Week 10: Savojarna vs. Murphtannia
Standings: 1. Savojarna 34/+20. 2. Baker Park 31/+25. 3. Mercedini 28/+10.
4. Cheergirls 20/0. 5. Twicetagria 18/-1. 6. Busoga Islands 15/-3. 7. Orion
Islands 14/-8. 8. Murphtannia 13/-6. 9. West Angola 7/-15. 10. TOTEL 4/-22.

There is no doubt that the upcoming 14th round in the World Cup qualifiers will be likely to determine Savojarna’s fate in the tournament. The Northlights are facing off the group’s top seed, the Commonwealth of Baker Park, in a revenge game for what was an exceptionally tight defeat in Belle Haven. Currently placed three points ahead of Baker Park, a victory would set Savojarna six points clear of the favourites, with only one higher seed still coming up as the team will travel to Mercedini for the penultimate game. More importantly, it would have them maintain a six point lead over Mercedini; potentially a crucial reserve if the Savojars should drop points in Zoloroni. Despite the Northlights coming off a win streak of eight games, confidence should not be too high, as the visit to Belle Haven has been the only loss of the Northlights and the duel with Mercedini was exceptionally tight; the group’s second seed has defeated Baker Park twice, clearly showing the potential they have.

Posters advertising the game are all over Sjoedrhavn these days

The key to victory probably lies in more defensive stability. It was individual mistakes that led to the problems of Savojarna in the first game, when they conceded two goals because of individual mistakes of the defenders. Linne Kjaer, who had been a culprit back then as she let Missy Tilton get away twice, has been substituted for Forsberg, foreshadowing a potential new top pairing in the Savojar central defence. Besides that, it seems like some small adjustments may have been made to shore up the defence, as Savojarna have only conceded three goals in the last seven games; including five clean sheets despite a wide variety of defenders and goalkeepers playing for the Northlights. Joonas Andersson, who has publicly declared to step down from international competition after this cycle (although he left open a window if Savojarna would miss the World Cup) returns to be the rock in the Savojar midfield; further shoring up the back against Baker Park.

Offensively, Rangren refused to answer the most pressing question and make a public choice between Jotansson and Jacobsen, although the first game suggests that Jotansson’s physical presence in the box may be a deciding factor. The striker has had another good season with Admiral Storevik, and is likely going to be a factor for Savojarna. The two are completely different types of players; Jacobsen is a team player who works a lot and goes back and forth, whereas Jotansson is an unspectacular player who is often invisible for large stretches of the game, but pounces fast on any sort of opportunity. The latter may be important for a game where Savojarna are not expected to get many chances, and will have to use whatever shots on goal they can get.

In the pre-match interview, Rangren seemed positive about her team’s form. Asked primarily about the Baker Park game, of course, she has already looked forward, stating that it is a great mistake to ignore the following game. “TOTEL are tenth, but we play them only four days after this game, and I think that it’s very dangerous to ignore this match. In the past, we have often lost a good position not because of our results against the top teams, but because we would be losing against these sides that were beaten by the others, but not by us. I don’t want this to become another case of throwing away a good start. I am consciously trying to change the team, to make sure that those playing TOTEL are able to focus on this game already, but of course we are all thinking about tomorrow”, she said in the pre-game interview. For Rangren, the game is special; qualifying to the World Cup would definitely cement her as the most successful national coach in Savojarna’s history as she would match Asbeck’s record in the World Cup, while also having coached the Northlights to two Copa Rushmori finals.

This, however, is not on her mind as all. “My thoughts are in the now, and otherwise, I would not be that successful with my team. The secret of getting anywhere in the shark tank of international football is to think of the upcoming games, and have the table in the back of your head, not the other way around. This is why we’re finally a consistent and solid team again, and this new patience is something we should cherish”, she said. The future may indeed look good for Savojarna; but tomorrow’s game will show how good exactly it is.

Savojarna line-up for Week 8
vs. Baker Park (4-2-3-1): Pakanen - Pedersen, Zirkova, Forsberg, Skov - Andersson, Maersk - Voynov, Lundell, Jashkin - Jotansson.
Bench: Virulainen, Thorvaldsson, Kjaer, Loeseth, Ilkkanen, Gren, Aarsoy, Mellin, Jacobsen
vs. TOTEL (4-2-3-1): Virulainen - Thorvaldsson, Kjaer, Forsberg, Loeseth - Ilkkanen, Maersk - Aarsoy, Lundell, Mellin - Jacobsen.
Bench: Pakanen, Pedersen, Zirkova, Skov, Andersson, Gren, Voynov, Jashkin, Jotansson

by **Starblaydia** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 9:00 am

Surging Toward the Cup
Starblaydia sit 11 points ahead with 15 to play for

The undefeated streak in World Cup Qualifying matches now sits at 22 matches for Ázëwyn Fëanáro's side, with thirteen of them coming in the current campaign. It's a run that has included the highest scoring draw of all time, along with five or more goals on seven occasions as Starblaydia have become one of the teams to watch in the Qualifiers. It puts them alongside the likes of a resurgent Ko-oren, clinical yet underwhleming Pasarga and the strangely quiet Valanora and Vilita, but still in the shadow of the thus far statistically perfect performances from Nephara, The Holy Empire and Banija. They're definitely in the conversation for likely World Champions, but there are still five games to go in Qualifying and seven crucial ones for the tournament itself.

It's a winning set of results that has, among other things, finally brought Fëanáro's managerial winning percentage above the magic 60% mark. Quite why that's a particularly noteworthy number, we're not entirely sure, but plenty of pundits are marking it down as Championship form. It's probably because, in the three distinct periods of the Starblaydi national team, the latest iteration's win percentage is at it's lowest total of 57.21%.

In the days when the World Cup flew by, before the first international hiatus, Starblaydia won two World Cups and most of their AOCAF Cups between the 15th and 34th edition with a win percentage of 64.08% from 568 games. Post the hiatus, between World Cups 38 and 57, three more World Championships arrived as the win percentage fell to 60.08% in 646 games. Since the second post-hiatus revival, one that almost took 80 years to really get going, the 631 matches have seen a 57.21% win rate. It's still more than one win in every two games, but it's significantly. psychologically, lower than the previous eras. In it, Starblaydia have just one AOCAF Cup to their name, won in the most recent tournament.

Fëanáro's personal record of a 60.08% win rate in the 248 games since taking over for the 78th edition is comparable to any of the periods in Starblaydi history when they were regarded as one of the best teams in the ranks, and her sides have managed to reach the Final of every major tournament they've entered at least once along the way. The win percentage can't tell us everything, nor can it predict silverware for any national team or the odds in any particular tournament, but what it does point to is the fact that everything is roughly on the right track.

As Starblaydia's players and staff prepare for two away matches in a row, one just across the Bekk to the west and the other over to SPFL, they know that the right results can secure them qualification to the World Cup with three or even four games to spare. Both opponents are mired on 18 points in the middle of Group 16 - the table that has become the the out-and-out Group of Death in these Qualifiers. A defeat for either of them, or even a draw, could entirely put paid to their dreams of a sneaky play-off berth, which currently lies 6 points ahead but with only 15 to play for. Starblaydia could, conceivably lose both games and still be in with a chance of qualifying automatically. Group 16 is so crazy so far, that there's only one thing that is certain about the next two games.

Both the Isserson and the Ibroskis will be rocking when Starblaydia come to town.

by **TJUN-ia** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 9:35 am

By Peter Davis (OOC: Goalscorers from Port Ember based on their teamsheet from CoH77.

It was only head-to-head that separated TJUN-ia and Tikariot heading into the next week of WC86Q fixtures and the pressure was on to decide who would (more than likely) make the playoffs to reach the promised land of the WC Finals. A double-header in Szensky was eagerly anticipated by many in the CSTO capital and by the time kick-off arrived against the devil, also known as Natanians and Nosts, Beregozera was ready for the biggest footballing festival in the history of CSTO football. N&N was the side that humiliated the Jaguars at this very ground last cycle and David Seems wanted to use this game as revenge for all lost in that cycle.

The game was high-octane right from the start, with both sides looking for all 3 points on the shores of Lake Szen. TJUN-ia struck first through Peliniho in the 16th minute, but it took just 2 minutes for Ion Cáius Ademélsson to level things up. In the 33rd minute, it was Gabriel Ápio Silva who gave the away side the lead for the first time but local hero Vladimir Podolov tied the fixture again in the 41st. 2-2 at half time, but more was to come. Natan Nínnio Gonçalo, the captain of the away side, gave his team the lead again in the 56th and then proceeded to try and hold to that advantage. It was tight but once the Galarian duo of Prince Carter and Archer Andrews was subbed on in the 64th, there was only one way this fixture was heading. Carter supplied Podolov with his 2nd in the 73rd before beautifully allowing Andrews to give the Jags the lead just 5 minutes later. Mohammad Malsharma was brought on to shore up the defence and that helped secure the 3 points. Revenge was ours and Szenskys.

Then, a few day's later, a resurgent Port Ember came to town. The Dragons were winless when we arrived in their homeland in MD4 but now Ken Block had steadied his players to 4th, just 5 points behind us. It was expected to be an entertaining affair for Szensky's swansong for this campaign and it certainly delivered. It was the Dragons who got the scoring underway, Leon Moult scoring in the 13th minute before Eric Tosaír of the Tribe of Waterford (using his full title) made it 2-0 to the visitors in the 20th. Szensky was stunned. Vladimir Podolov opened the TJUN-ian scoring just before half time, but more was needed to overturn a defiant PE looking to keep in the hunt for Top 2 themselves. Podolov scored his 2nd in the 56th to tie the game for the first time but William Carvello, the man who replaced Ray Reddington after her death, gave the Dragons the lead again with 10 minutes to play. It looked as if PE would win, but the Draw Masters lived up to their name. Vijay Palalele took the corner in the 89th which was headed in by Podolov, a hattrick in his homeland just before the end of the game. The scenes in Beregozera were astounding.

TJUN-ia went undefeated in Szensky, 1 win and 2 draws. The CSTO capital has been rejuvenated of all its footballing woes and that sums up TJUN-ia's campaign as a whole thus far. Mriin remain 7 points in front, but we now lead Tikariot by a single point heading into another set of important fixtures. An away day in Union Europae will certainly be an interesting affair, but the main focus will be on the game after: the Reavers are coming to TJUN-ia City. Our qualification as group winners may be a long shot, but it's not over until the fat lady sings. It's do or die from this point forward. GO JAGS!

SCHEDULE (Group 11) - lines indicate when next edition of Boot It! will be released
MD1: @Filindostan (50) W 3-2 (T-2nd)
MD2: vs Se Vende Skooma (344) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City W 5-2 (1st)
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MD3: @Natanians and Nosts (114) - Stadion Nacional (?) D 0-0 (1st)
MD4: @Port Ember (38) - Lilly Black Memorial Stadium, Port Ember Megalopolis W 1-0 (1st)
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MD5: vs Union Europae (UR) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky D 0-0 (1st)
MD6: @Mriin (16) - Haven, Maal L 1-3 (2nd)
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MD7: vs South Newlandia (87) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong L 2-3 (4th)
MD8: @Southern Palm Islands (310) W 1-0 (T-2nd)
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MD9: vs Tikariot (243) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City L 0-1 (3rd/4W-2D-3L/+2GD/14pts)
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MD10: vs Filindostan (50) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong W 6-3 (3rd)
MD11: @Se Vende Skooma (344) W 4-1 (3rd)
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MD12: vs Natanians and Nosts (114) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky W 4-3 (2nd)
MD13: vs Port Ember (38) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky D 3-3 (2nd)
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MD14: @Union Europae (UR)
MD15: vs Mriin (16) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
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MD16: @South Newlandia (87) - Jecken Arena, Newport
MD17: vs Southern Palm Islands (310) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong
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MD18: @Tikariot (243) - Dhaencunor Arena, Tikariot City

by **95X** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 10:16 am

Sarah Foureleven had just left the last 95X National Team practice before World Cup 86 Qualifiers started, when she was confronted in a corridor of the practice facility by a man in a suit and trench coat. Sarah could also sense someone else had snuck up behind her.

“Leave me alone, I do not wish to speak to you,” she tried to direct him.

“You will talk to me, or at least listen. And whatever it is that causes people to do things won’t work either.”

Sarah was speechless, how did he know about that?

“Who I am and who I represent isn’t important, and I’ll be brief. You’re going to throw your performance in the upcoming competition and you will be paid. We already have people on the inside, working for us, that will see to this. If you don’t follow through there will be serious consequences.”

“I won’t be threatened, much less by a male,” Sarah rejected.

“I’m just the messenger. You have been warned,” the man closed.

Sarah turned around to find a woman, also wearing a trench coat and much shorter than Sarah’s six-foot-eight height, standing right behind her with a revolver, ready to be used if necessary.

“This conversation never happened,” the woman threatened. “Consider this your one and only warning.”

Sarah never encountered the two again and contacted a legal representative. Little did she know said legal representative was connected to one of those ‘inside’ people who said not to tell her anything Sarah had been instructed not to discuss, so Sarah bluffed and claimed she had a question about athlete likeness licensing rights in other countries.

Before she could talk to anyone else about anything, her adopted big sister Jordyn left mysteriously, and her parents had been arrested.

Sometime after World Cup 86 is said and done, Jordyn Foureleven met a doctor going by the name “Holm”. He seemed to be from a different world and somehow they wound up in the same place.

“I can fix your spinal cord,” Holm promised, after hearing of Jordyn’s plight. “You’ll be able to walk again. It’s a controversial method called ‘healer mech serum’. It’s rare, but I’m willing to perform the procedure on you.”

Jordyn agrees, and the procedure goes smoothly. She intended to return to 95X when Holm tells her something upsetting.

“I’m sorry to tell you that you can’t go back to 95X. I don’t know what happened, but they canceled all modes of transportation going there. I’ll give you a referral to someone who can help you start a new life here.”

by **Tikariot** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 10:40 am

Martin Seagrave: We bid you welcome from Fort Viljan, where fall has fully hit as you can see in the background, it is raining and kind of foggy, so not the greatest weather for a football game. I'm Martin Seagrave and with me here are Dustin Haldane, Andreas Svedberg and Parramore Haigh.

Andreas Svedberg: In case you are wondering where Alistair is, he caught himself a headcold and is at home in Morannon, we hope you get better soon, so we're on our own here tonight. But we have Parramore Haigh here, Tikariot City FC striker, welcome to the team.

Parramore Haigh: Thank you, happy to be here, even though I would much rather be down there.

Duncan Haldane: I can imagine. But in case you don't know, Parramore had to be carried off after a horrendous foul in the first game in Se Vende Skooma, what happened there?

Parramore Haigh: It was a pretty physical game and quite frankly they really went over the line more than once, Rory was sent off because he tried to kind of retaliate, Marvin almost was sent off, too, and I am on the sidelines for a few weeks, I hope I'll be able to be back for the start of the season.

Martin Seagrave: Let's have a look at what happened in Se Vende Skooma.

There is a lot of venom in the game now after several fouls, arguments, a red card and quite frankly it is a disgrace that Se Vende Skooma still has eleven players on the pitch. Al Hak going down the right side, moves the ball forward to Jowlit. Flicks it over to Haigh and oh my God! Haigh is on the ground after a horrible challenge by the Se Vende Skooma defender, this is not looking good at all! Let's have another look here. Haigh takes the ball down and tries to cut inside and he comes rushing in, misses the ball and hits Haigh's ankle instead. Ooh, look at how it twists it!

Parramore Haigh: It was bad. I could feel it right away that something was torn and both the inner and outer ligamets are torn, so I'm out for a while here.

Duncan Haldane: You seem to be in fairly good spirits, though.

Parramore Haigh: Well, there's nothing I can do, so just trying to look forward.

Martin Seagrave: How is the mood in the team so far after this surprisingly good campaign?

Parramore Haigh: The guys are awesome and this qualifiers so far have really moulded everybody into one tight unit. We have a pretty young squad, so there had been a lot of critics coming up and saying that we didn't have enough experience and would suffer from it, but we're here and we're going.

Andreas Svedberg: Some people were critical of your inclusion in the squad as your season with the TCFC had been a little hit and miss, do you feel that you proved them wrong?

Parramore Haigh: Haha, you will always find someone who's unhappy, but I must say that I was a little surprised, too, but it has been an incredible growing experience for me, because this is the real deal. Sure, the TPL is competitive and all, but here you get exposed to a lot of different teams and countries and there are a couple of really good teams out there.

Martin Seagrave: You had mentioned that you're hoping to be back for the new season and we heard today that you have a new team mate!

Parramore Haigh: Yeah, Ellis Wagstaff is coming over from Miruan, which is great news! I mean, definitely nothing against Silas, but Ellis is a really strong forward, variable and I'm really happy that the team was able to sign him!

Duncan Haldane: There also are a lot of speculations swirling around right now in anticipation of the transfer window, Juan Esnáider from Sargossa is rumoured to be in touch with the Oriannor Mountaineers, who already had signed Gré Arceneaux from Ko-oren, Eivora Athletic has expressed interest in The Sarian's Kameron Bondstad and Græntfjall's Hlégestur Snæþórsson also allegedly is a person of interest from the TPL.

Martin Seagrave: And also domestically the rumour mill is in full swing, with Morris Nighthorse the probably most prolific free agent out there, but Baraldhur already said that they want to resign him no matter what and after the season he had and also his performances for the national team, he is a must-sign for sure.

Parramore Haigh: Yes, he's on an absolutely mad run and Baraldhur already signed Santini from Juvencus and him and Morris could be absolutely lethal.

Andreas Svedberg: That could be something to look out for for sure. But let's have a look at the matters at hand, which to start things off is our second match against South Newlandia. We've been a bit of a boogeyman for them so far, as they do not seem to be able to win against us, is that a good omen?

Duncan Haldane: Yes and no. We've really been on a run against them, but they have a good team out there and they have found their stride, too, so this game definitely was not a guaranteed three points. So let's have a look at today's lineups. Any surprises?

Martin Seagrave: Not really. We have to rotate to keep players fresh, because it is going to be a really intense last few match days and the last game against TJUN-ia might very well be a playoff for the playoff spot behind Mriin, so we have to make sure we even out the strain a bit.

Duncan Haldane: So how do you think the team will deal with the pressure?

Andreas Svedberg: That's difficult to say really. So far they have been admirable about it, but this is the biggest tournament they have ever been in, so at one point it might dawn on them how important this is.

Duncan Haldane: Now Parramore, if you go into a game like against South Newlandia and them never having won against us, does that affect your mindframe how to approach the game?

Parramore Haigh: Not really. I think that it's more the press that pushes those things, because it gives them a nice headline, but when you're down there on the pitch, all you think about is the game, not how you've played against them before. Sure, you might be thinking about the other games in the group, like in this case TJUN-ia, but I think that we got this down to the point where we're just focused on the opponent at hand.

Duncan Haldane: That's good to hear. So let's go to the game itself and South Newlandia in front of a sell-out crowd at the Elephant Dome definitely showed a completely different face in the beginning.

A lot of pressure by the Elephants right from the get go, so it really shows that they have something to prove tonight, especially in front of a home crowd. Lancaster pushes the ball forward, quick one-two with Li, slices the ball into the box, Irving header and Chatelet can pluck the ball right down. Very nice build-up here. Quick and far kick by Chatelet, trying to surprise South Newlandia. Cumbernauld takes down the ball, lays it over to Aspinall - shot - and Trischuk with one fist, this is starting out very nicely!

Andreas Svedberg: He is right, South Newlandia is trying to prove something to their fans and they are a lot more alert, a lot more offense-minded early on. But that also opens chances for us for counter attacks and it's great for Chatelet to be this aware of what's going on at the other end of the field to help create these chances.

Martin Seagrave: One thing that was nice to see was that the fans didn't seem to hold a grudge against Vincent Liniack after having put Jack Schroeder in the hospital in the first game and overall the game was remarkably clean, no dangerous tackles, no big ballyhoo like in Se Vende Skooma, it was really nice to see.

Duncan Haldane: Absolutely. But that does not mean that we did not have a fierce game at our hands. South Newlandia's confidence showed throughout the first half hour, with Lancaster and McCabe being the two midfield motors that would have every attack orchestrated.

The Tikariot midfield has huge issues keeping Donald Lancaster and Patrick McMora under control here and again the machinery is kicking in motion. Lancaster picking up the ball in the back, threads it through to McMora. He feeds it to the right to Irving, sharp cross inside, but Coronello clears. Ball falls to Wallis, sprays it left to Lancaster again. High ball back towards Wallis, volley shot and grazes the crossbar as it goes over!

Andreas Svedberg: It was like a completely different team compared to the first game, they were confident, focused, they showed fighting spirit, it was great to see, even though it obviously did not make things look good for us.

Martin Seagrave: Someone once said that there are teams you are more likely to be ok with to lose against, I think the Elephants are likely one of them, but still, with this much on the line friendships are not going to be at the forefront of everybody's minds.

Duncan Haldane: Haha, no, not really, but still we were not without our share of chances in the process, likely also helped along by South Newlandia being a lot more offensive than before.

Again South Newlandia pushing forward, McMora and Li with a nice one-two, beautiful pass right between the Tikariot defenders to Irving! Quick turn, shoots! Chatelet can deflect! McCabe gets to it first and Dunlap clears for a corner. McMora goes out and it's like a maelstrom in the box with everybody vying for the best positions here. The ball comes in and Chatelet plucks it down. Again a quick punt forward finds Cumbernauld. The defenders are trying to race back, but we have a three against two situation right now! Cumbernauld to Haney, who only has Anderson ahead of him! No-look pass back to Cumbernauld, lays it voer to McTierney and HOLY! If this was planned it was genius! But it looks like he did not hit the ball right and it takes this really odd curve slicing past Trischuk! 1-0 Tikariot!

Martin Seagrave: At this point these quick counter attacks were our biggest weapon to try to break through South Newlandia's pressing and again Chatelet with the quick transition forward, but the goal was as beautiful as it was an accident. There is no way McTierney can have planned for the ball to get this weird kind of rotation on purpose.

Andreas Svedberg: He is known for attempting the impossible, though.

Martin Seagrave: Yeah, but look here, the ball slides across his foot and that's probably been the best thing that could've happened to him.

Duncan Haldane: So again Tikariot in the lead, which should have put a dent into South Newlandia's confidence, but they did not show any signs of abating, quite the contrary.

South Newlandia are now even increasing their pressure. Almost at half time and the shot ratio is 8 to 2 in South Newlandia's favour, even though they are down by one goal. To be honest, it looks as if it should just be a matter of time until something goes wrong for our defense here. Wright going for a run down the right, stopped by Dunlap with a nice tackle, but Li picks up the ball, nice cross to Lancaster. Direct layoff to McCabe, he goes into the box, Coronello with the block! Wallis with the volley and phew, inches past the post! I will make the prediction that this will not be a shutout for Tikariot tonight!

Duncan Haldane: We did hold on until the half time whistle, but boy, what a game it was up to that point. Almost looks like they're letting out all of their frustrations about previous encounters here.

Parramore Haigh: That can happen. But it's also dangerous, because you can get so over focused on trying to steamroll the opponent that you leave the back exposed.

Martin Seagrave: Good point. Bishop came on for Wallis for the second half. Wallis had not been as involved in the offense this game, so Wolverine trying to shake things up a little and sometimes as a coach you just have this feeling that one little change can tip the scales.

Almost an hour gone and Abdurahman Bishop has added yet another log to the offensive fire of South Newlandia, whose attacks have been coming in almost non-stop. Lancaster with a lateral to McMora. Chip over McNair to Irving, nice fake out gets him past Liniack, McCabe completely open and GOAL! Knox completely out of position and McCabe alone in front of Chatelet and the ball goes right next to the near post, it was coming!

Andreas Svedberg: If you're under constant pressure like this it's really hard to avoid conceding. We could have completely parked the bus, but that's just not something this team seems to be able to do and there we have it. Knox completely out of position there, not sure who he thought he was covering, but it definitely was not McCabe and kudos for Irving not to be selfish and try to score himself, but laying it off to McCabe. A deserved equalizer.

Martin Seagrave: As much as it hurts to say that, but it definitely was. And Knox went off after that with Walter Thomas coming on. We did manage to get a few chances in here and there, but it was clear that this was South Newlandia's redemption game, also to keep them in contention for the playoff spot.

Ten minutes to go and South Newlandia is still heaping it on. It is surprising to see that the Tikariot defense is still standing. Trischuk with the kick off, comes to McMora. McCabe out on the left, gets the ball, moves into the box, he has Dunlap and Coronello in the way, lays it back to Li and GOAL! He just ventures a shot through traffic and Chatelet sees the ball way too late to be able to react! 2-1 South Newlandia and now it is going to get really difficult for us to get back into this game!

Duncan Haldane: Commendable how they managed to keep the offensive pressure up like this and also commendable for our defense to hold up until now, but Li with a kind of lucky shot for it to get through all of these legs without getting stopped or deflected. So now we had to open up and push forward and we almost had it right after.

McNair driving forward now. Shakes off Bishop and Li, over to McTierney, ooh, nutmeg against Lancaster! Chips it into the box, Haney rises up, lays it off to Connolly, HITS THE POST! Trischuk doesn't even move, but it goes off the post! I wouldn't be surprised, if there's a dent in the post now! Kick off by Trischuk now, Cumbernauld faster than Li, ball goes out to Connolly again, cuts back, short pass to Aspinall, ouch, that must have hurt, him and O'Neill hitting the ball at the same time! Aspinall down, but Li moving the ball forward. Lancaster to McCabe. Quick lay back to Irving, McMora coming at full steam! Irving steps aside and RIGHT UNDER THE CROSSBAR! 3-1 South Newlandia! Only six minutes to go, this is really not looking good right now!

Andreas Svedberg: What a game, both teams going at it with an open vizer, if that shot by Connolly goes in, we're back in business, but then that counter attack and boom, gone, over. That's the risk when you play such a high line, trying to score.

Parramore Haigh: It's just how those games sometimes go. You push forward towards the end of the game and you're just open. And the way they've been playing there, with such confidence, these shots just go in.

Martin Seagrave: And along the game we also heard rumours of a few TPL teams having expressed interest in Donald Lancaster and Patrick McMora, after their performances today I am not surprised, but they just won the title with the Walstreim Lions, so there might have to be a lot of persuading to be done.

Duncan Haldane: So redemption complete, South Newlandia wins 3-1 and with TJUN-ia beating Natanians and Nosts 4-3 at the same time that pushes us back into third position, three points adrift of TJUN-ia and just two ahead of Port Ember, who stayed ahead of the Southern Palm Islands 1-0, adding a lot of pressure for our team.

Martin Seagrave: That's how the cookie crumbles sometimes. Especially with us having the Southern Palm Islands the game after and TJUN-ia hosting Port Ember.

Duncan Haldane: So without much further ado, let's jump right into Fort Viljan here, where the Snowy Owls played the Southern Palm Islands in a now even more crucial game. Let's have a look at the line-ups for this one as well.

Martin Seagrave: Several changes here tonight, Grimes, Thomas, Al Hak, Thorniley, van Haar, Nighthorse, Burnett, more than ever before, I think, but I think that especially Thorniley and Nighthorse would make a big difference here, but they definitely needed a break.

Duncan Haldane: The Southern Palm Islands have been very low profile throughout the competition and do you think that the weather was an advantage for us?

Andreas Svedberg: Well, looking at where they are from I would definitely say yes. Not a lot of palm around Fort Viljan.

Duncan Haldane: Hahaha, no, you're right, so let's dive right into this foggy, rainy, windy mess of a game.

Like a different team this early in the game already. Where in South Newlandia they were pushed back almost constantly, the Snowy Owls are right in offensive mode already! Grimes scouring a path down the left, on to Thorniley, quick hook around Torus, high cross out to Aspinall. Forces his way past Feachell, shoots! Off the post and GOAL! Nighthorse with the head! Off to a great start already! Nighthorse at the right spot at the right time, 1-0!

Martin Seagrave: Great start here, direct, precise play, letting the ball flow nicely. Aspinall with very nice determination as he gets past Feachell here and a bit of luck that the ball deflects off the post right to Nighthorse, but that's what a good strikers does, be at the right place at the right time.

Duncan Haldane: Unfortunately the joy was rather shortlived.

First attack by the Southern Palm Islands now. Darmraj with a long pass forward to Brothasear. Nicely taken down, hard pass to Krishn, curves the cross and Das with the header! GOAL! Chatelet still gets his hand on it, but too well placed here. 1-1 only two minutes after the lead, Ekstrom is furious on the sideline, gesturing and yelling, definitely not one of the Snowy Owls' most proud defensive moment here.

Martin Seagrave: The jog trot was back, still celebrating the early lead and then letting concentration slip just for a moment and boom, eating a goal. I was really afraid that Ekstrom was going to blow a gasket right then and there!

Parramore Haigh: Can't blame him. Our midfield was too sluggish and Das should not have been able to get between James and Walter like that. Everybody too slow and that's when it happens.

Duncan Haldane: At least it was still early in the game, so enough time to right the ship again.

Thorniley gets the ball from van Haar. Being pushed to the left side there. Quick burst forward, cuts the ball back to Grimes. Nice cross, Burnett with the header and nice save by Khan! The ball falls to Nathan, he hoofs it forward. Torus just a smidge faster than van Haar there. While falling he whips it forward, Plascas takes it on the bounce and GOAL! What on earth is happening here? 2-1 for the Southern Palm Islands! This is going all wrong here!

Andreas Svedberg: A string of unfortunate events here. If van Haar had gotten to the ball first. If while falling Torus hadn't hit the ball properly. If Plascas didn't manage to hit it just right. But no matter how many ifs, we were down and Stuart Ekstrom did blow a gasket, which was promptly rewarded with a red card for him after a few choice words for his own team and him storming onto the pitch. So assistant coach Dominic Prevost had to take over and try to do some damage control here.

Duncan Haldane: It did not look good at that time and I personally was worried that the team might fall apart here, losing in South Newlandia, now two goals in such short time, Ekstrom in the stands, but if one thing bodes well for the pressures of the last few match days, the team did try to pull itself together.

Well, at least they are not just letting themselves hang here, Al Hak moving the ball forward to Cumbernauld. He really has come into his own during the last few matches. Lob inside to Burnett, heads it on to Nighthorse. Moves into the box stepover, at the baseline sharp cross, Aspinall and IT'S IN! He kept the ball low when everybody expected it go come high and Aspinall just has to put his foot in the path. We are even!

Martin Seagrave: It is amazing what difference Morris Nighthorse makes in our games. He's not in for one game and we go down and the moment he is back he already has one goal and one assist.

Duncan Haldane: Well, that was it for the first half, with the Southern Palms withering by the minute in the inclement weather, so that gave more hope for the second half as the weather did not promise to get any better, quite the contrary.

Andreas Svedberg: Keylick came on for Al Hak early in the second half and the Blue Palms definitely did not enjoy the weather, because it was obvious that they were not used to this and I grew up near Fort Viljan and played here for twelve years and around this time of year it can get pretty nasty and cold with the humidity making it feel even worse.

Duncan Haldane: As time went by, that became more more and more obvious, as they seemed to focus more and more on their defense as if huddling together made the weather more bearable.

Not much offensive movements anymore by the Southern Palm Islands and Tikariot with more and more pressure, even though the pitch conditions are getting worse. Thorniley with a long, long cross, Burnett and Shariyar clears for a corner. Van Haar curling away from the goal, Burnett can't get behind, Coronello with the header - GOAL! GOAL! 3-2! We have turned the game!

Martin Seagrave: Well, you have to take any opportunity to score and it doesn't matter if it is the weather or a mistake or anything. So 3-2 and at the same time it showed that Port Ember had just scored the 3-2 goal in TJUN-ia, so renewed hope and renewed energy.

Andreas Svedberg: Cumbernauld and Grimes came off for Vacarese and McIlroy to preserve some strength and at the same time bring fresh legs and maybe manage to score one more goal here.

The game has dramatically lost tempo here, Tikariot is up 3-2 and doesn't want to risk any injuries, the Southern Palm Islands seem to have reached full rigidity as they are barely moving anymore. Coronello has the ball now, through to Vacarese. Cross over to the right side for Keylick. He goes to the goal line, cross into the box and Burnett rises up - 4-2!! This must be it!

Duncan Haldane: And it was, the islanders did not have anything left to give and Tikariot didn't have to, so we're going out of this with three points, one less than hoped, and unfortunately TJUN-ia did end up scoring the equalizer for a 3-3, so we are one point behind TJUN-ia now.

Martin Seagrave: A quick look at the next two match days shows that both teams do not have easy opponents. We will have to travel to both Port Ember and Filindostan and TJUN-ia has an away game in Union Europae, which they will likely win, before hosting Mriin, who hopefully will keep on their winning ways to give us a fighting chance.

Duncan Haldane: So any ideas yet how our line-up will look against Port Ember?

Andreas Svedberg: Matter of fact yes, Liniack, McNair and Wagstaff are back in the starting eleven and for Filindostan we don't have any inklings yet.

Duncan Haldane: OK, let's keep looking ahead and hope for the best and maybe Alistair is back, but to be honest, I like this spot, you just do the segues and ask questions. Anyways, see you soon and stay safe!

by **Tequilo** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 10:58 am

THE PROGNOSTICATIONS FOR OXO CONDÓR
3/5 Gabriel Ángel Arca de Yaya

A lot of hokum has been written about six-time Galactico winner Oxo Cóndor; some might say we’re continuing that tradition with the series about his earliest days… before all the shenanigans with the President, the curious incident of the god in the nightdress, and that misunderstanding with Margaret. And all that.

Old Man Chuco | Carhuanina The Resplendent | Gabriel Ángel Arca de Yaya |
Lilián Tlalqui-Arca | Teodor Xuilo Gabriel Tlalqui ‘Oxo’ de Chanco Cóndor

It was the turn of Gabriel Ángel Arca de Yaya, the step-father of young Oxo Cóndor, to entertain one of the boy’s wightfathers - that is to say mentor, or adviser, or nominated guardian in the event of a cataclysmic termination event - ahead of the important Confusiónist ceremony, the Insubstantiation: in which the four year old is inducted by way of rites and rituals and hard drinking among the adults into Confusiónism and what stands for a church in that system of incredulous disbelief, The House of Shambles. The Insubstantiation is a catechism of shambolic sacraments that begins with a series of ludicrous stories, ends with the children in bed and the adults intoxicated, and somewhere in the middle includes a collection of solemn vows by the three wightfathers to ensure a range of largely contradictory and/or impossible outcomes for the child as they emerge into the full citizenship of adulthood. Wightfathering is a tremendously important role in the life of a child devout in the ways of the Great Shambolic Denial (which, put as succinctly as I possibly can, establishes that all doctrines of faith in the supernatural are inherently preposterous, and that each and every one of them should be celebrated thus, as terrific works of fiction; and that all stories can be elaborated upon in the telling to bring about yet more colour and joy for future adherents of The Denial, or Confusiónism to use the proper nomenclature).

And so here we are in La Rosa Cantina, in the town of Chanco Cóndor, where little Oxo’s step-father is helping the boy’s wightfather, Señor Llopa, understand Ángel’s hopes and dreams for his adoptive child, in order that Señor Llopa might help those dreams come true. And it is in many ways the most well-aligned of the meetings between family and wightfathers in the case of young Oxo, since whereas Señor Siñoy, a postman, has been commissioned by Oxo’s grandfather to turn him into a world-class footballer, and Señor Sá, a drayman for the brewery, has been commissioned by Oxo’s grandmother to turn him into a cunning shapeshifter and sorceror, here Señor Llopa, Señor Arturo Llopa of Llopa Hardware & Ironmongery in Yaya, has been asked by Ángel to help the boy learn a trade, become an electrician or a carpenter or a plumber, so that whatever might become of him, he will be able to look after his house. It is a commission eminently deliverable by the stout and stoic ironmonger. What does Señor Siñoy know of football agency, or as he readily admits, Señor Sá of conjuring? Not a great deal. But Ángel has chosen wisely, and planned smartly, and recruited a wightfather to do a job. That Ángel, also a man of the city of Yaya like Señor Llopa himself, was certainly the sensible one in the family. That is why Lilián picked him to help her rear the child.

Now the deal done and the plans made, and neither the eminently sensible Ángel nor dour Señor Llopa inclined to excessive drinking or idle gossip, they part company with a vigorous shake of the hand having concluded their business in short order and about three hundred words below my target for this post, with nowt extraordinary to report and even La Rosa Cantina on the quiet side; and so it might fall to me finally as a filler to recap on how it came to be that Ángel was raising the boy Oxo who was not his own blood, and what has become of the lad’s real father - save that no-one, except perhaps his mother Lilián, knows who the father of Teodor Xuilo Gabriel Tlalqui de Chanco Cóndor, commonly Oxo Cóndor, actually is. And Lilián is not telling. Rumour amongst Los Bastardos, the unruly young men of the town (many of whom courted the feisty and handsome young woman before she retired with child), is that a footballer from the island of Antivador, where the scenery is fine and the people hard to like for their aloofishness, came to Chanco Cóndor and fell into the arms of Lilián, and that she sent him away with a curse but took from him his progeny; and that this unfortunate Antivadorio has been blighted with bad luck and misery ever since, wandering the earth getting into scrapes and situations, and cursing the day he didn’t write an email back to the wild woman to tell her he’d gone off on a world tour with the national football team. But that just sounds like a bunch of made up stuff by some silly boys down at the old market in town, when they haven’t got anything better to do than remember the times when Lilián would run with them, and cause mischief for the people of that town.

TAPALUPÉ, Tequilo - Another four matches down? Where have we been? Well, that’s a story for another cut-off, and probably one for Forum 7; let’s not go there now. So, let’s have a quick catch-up on how our second attempt at World Cup qualifying is proceeding so far - all your analysis, in numbers, with our unique and exclusive Copametro. But first, back by popular demand - or because the Editor wants everyone to know you can still write to him…¹

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
The Issues That Are Making Your Whine Gaskets Whistle Right Now

Some eagle-eyed readers spotted our missing match reports in the last edition, but only our good friend and critic Rubèn Curto from Chanco Cóndor had the foresight to write in: “I feel I have to warn you that your ‘football’ column - and I say that under advisement - is running the risk of being anything but, if you can’t be bothered to put a match report in every now and again. I don’t know if you have realised, but there have been four matches since your last report - would you like me to assist by sending you the tapes I recorded off my television set?”

Thanks for the reminder, Rubèn, please see our catch up below. Betamax tapes not required.

We like to think of Tequilo as our happy place but sometimes you good readers just don’t agree. Xeneral Desdén of San Dolores writes, “It is with a heavy heart I write to inform you that I am leaving, and I will not be back.” - I’m not sure that letter was meant for us, Xeneral, and if you see this, do let us know, and we will forward on to the unfortunate person who will surely miss you terribly.

We have airmail! From a foreign place! Colin Yerchkov, of The Plough Islands, writes: “I hope this letter finds you well. It has been brought to my attention that - hang on, the phone just rang. Regards, Colin Yerchkov.”

And finally, Minerva Varfell, a Boneswoman of the good ship HMS Wednesday Afternoon presently docked in Ciuredor, takes time out of her busy day in the crows nest to send us a message in a bottle: “I very much enjoyed your series of letters attempting to pin down the last known location of missing footballer - I believe you call it ‘pitxi’? - García de Corcoles, and wonder if you plan on reviving the debate? Only I am pretty sure I saw him wash up on a beach just down the way from here a few days ago. He certainly looked a little worse for wear. Do you think I ought to call emergency services?”

THIS COULD ACTUALLY BE A THING, SAYS NO-ONE JUST YET WITH KO-OREN ON THE WAY

Nobody wants to talk about it, and we really shouldn’t write about it - but, is it time to start believing? An impressive haul of ten points from a possible twelve in the second half of qualifying has put Los Pitxileros in clear second position, with the primary candidate for that slot, 95X, having a dip in form over the same period. There is a long way to go yet, including visits to runaway leaders Ko-oren in the next round of matches, and a potentially winner-takes-all-well-at-least-a-little-something final matchday clash in Pacific City with 95X. But a run of seven games unbeaten has the Agave-Blues eyeing a qualification to the World Cup proper, and with five games still to play, even the national team’s eleven-game unbeaten record - achieved twice - is up for grabs; Ko-oren & Margaret notwithstanding. Speaking of records, striker Tlacolotl is the first player to win three consecutive player of the match awards for Tequilo and even stretched the record to an impressive four in a row, an individual record that could well stand for many years to come.

Coach Isaac Martí must be delighted with the progress of his team so far and will be appreciative of the squad gaining some strength with the return of a number of absentees over the last few games. There were positive returns to the playing line-up for Alexandro Calvocheaga after his three game ban and even more so young midfield hero Niño Pinto, returning after serious injury put him out for eight qualifying games - he even scored on his comeback in Huayramarca. A no less spectacular return was produced by winger Tutayan who got a recall after dropping well down the pecking order, impressed for two games and then got a straight red for violent conduct in the Jeruselem draw and a three match ban. Also now out for the duration are key first teamers Huracan & Ecuador who will miss the rest of qualifying through injury. At this point, in terms of replacements, it appears coach Martí is going for experience and trusting to his regular stand-ins Noxochinoch at the back and Urlegi Gorostola up front.

THE STATS

TEQUILO 3-0 Iles Rogieres HT: 1-0

Location: Estadio Florenzio Mesperuza (El Mesperuza), Iragartze
Attendance: 76,503
Scorers: Tlacolotl 35’ Tutayan 74’ Mateo Tafalla 82’
Booked: Apeiztegui | Voisin, Pierroix
Tequilo Line-Up: Oscar Bienvenida | Patrick Zambo (sub: Llösë Lea), Haize Apeiztegui, Noxochinoch, Chicchan | Nufro de Urueña | Vilca Hualla, Mateo Tafalla, Tutayan | Tlacolotl, Ecuador
Player of the Match: Tlacolotl (Tequilo)

Sajnur 1-2 TEQUILO HT: 1-1

Location: Unconfirmed stadium, somewhere in Sajnur
Attendance: The Ultra-Mariachis split into four groups to cover each possible venue, so n locals + 2 sombreros and a 1 in 4 chance of the dog being there.
Scorers: Jessica Siafik 28’ | Ecuador 5’ Huracan 79’
Booked: Laghfiev, Viuerev, Verjez, Ciuru| Bienvenida, Huracan, Tafalla, Tlacolotl
Tequilo Line-Up: Oscar Bienvenida | Llösë Lea, Haize Apeiztegui (sub: Noxochinoch), Huracan, Huachalla | Ixtub Tün (sub: Nufro de Urueña) | Vilca Hualla, Mateo Tafalla, Tutayan (sub: Ricardo Bailén) | Tlacolotl, Ecuador
Player of the Match: Tlacolotl (Tequilo)

TEQUILO 2-2 Jeruselem HT: 0-1

Location: Estadio Cuahtemoc, Huayna-Comitán
Attendance: 71, 887
Scorers: Tlacolotl 54’ 61’ | Kate Dallas 21’ Aaliyah Dallas 83’
Booked: Tafalla (2), Chicote |Dogstein, Fletcher
Sent Off: Tafalla, Tutayan (straight red)
Tequilo Line-Up: Oscar Bienvenida | Llösë Lea, Haize Apeiztegui (sub: Tol Chicote), Huracan (sub: Noxochinoch), Huachalla | Ixtub Tün | Vilca Hualla, Mateo Tafalla, Tutayan | Tlacolotl, Ecuador (sub: Alexandro Calvoecheaga)
Player of the Match: Tlacolotl (Tequilo)

Huayramarca 0-1 TEQUILO HT: 0-1

Location: Estadio Nacional de Huayramarca, Metro Huayramarca
Attendance: 43,863 locals + the Ultra-Mariachis (8 combat helmets + the dog in a flak jacket)
Scorers: Nino Pinto 22’
Booked: Mamani, Sayritupac | Apeiztegui, Huachalla, Ixtub Tün, Vilca Hualla, Noxochinoch
Tequilo Line-Up: Oscar Bienvenida | Llösë Lea (sub: Raul Hoyo), Haize Apeiztegui, Huracan (sub: Noxochinoch), Huachalla | Ixtub Tün | Vilca Hualla, Niño Pinto (sub: Cio Çenturion), Leyton | Tlacolotl, Alexandro Calvoecheaga
Player of the Match: Vilca Hualla (Tequilo)

NEXT UP

The Big One is coming in the next round of matches as Tequilo travel to leaders Ko-oren, a game the Dragonflies will look to take all three points from to effectively lock off the group and win qualification. But coach Martí will have something to say about that, reminding everyone of the famous win in Ko-oren in the last World Cup cycle, and he has stated he’d like four points from these two games so one assumes he’ll take a draw over there. He’ll be saving some of his players as he rotates for the home game before that, and will welcome back captain Mateo Tafalla from suspension to lead the offensive formation. The tie at El Volcán against Netop, before heading out to Ko-oren, will certainly not be considered a foregone conclusion - a mistake this team has made before - but the coach will look to bring back some fringe players who have lost their way a bit, to stake a claim for the future. The line-up includes the welcome return of combative left back Garaitz Minha, as well as promising young defender Camilo Caira. Vice captain Xaime Medal, who has struggled to impress during his first World Cup cycle, gets another chance as does Ricardo Bailén on the right, while up front is a rare chance for Manco Bran Somoza in a young line-up which the coach surely hopes will be hungry, feeling like it has a lot to prove. Now would be the time…

Confirmed Line-Up for TEQUILO vs. Netop: Oscar Bienvenida | Garaitz Minha, Noxochinoch, Camilo Caira, Chicchan (Capitan) | Ixtub Tün | Xaime Medal (VC), Niño Pinto, Ricardo Bailén | Manco Bran Somoza, Alexandro Calvoecheaga

Venue: Estadio Pablo Invocador (El Volcán), Tapalupé

Expected Line-Up for TEQUILO @ Ko-oren: Oscar Bienvenida | Patrick Zambo, Haize Apeiztegui (VC), Noxochinoch, Huachalla | Ixtub Tün | Vilca Hualla, Mateo Tafalla (Capitan), Leyton | Tlacolotl, Urlegi Gorostola

Venue: Surbourneshire Square, Greencaster

1Or TG Tequilo - really, do! We guarantee to read every letter, and print or paraphrase or misquote each of them.

by **Xanneria** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 11:18 am

A brief guide to the wonderful world of Xannerian Footy
An Editorial by Steve Stevenson

Xannerian football, a sport almost uniquely its own as it is a part of the world, in the 1920s the game was first played and clubs started sprouting up especially in towns and cities like Alexandria, Dominica City and Peralham. Those clubs eventually lead to the teams we have today known as Alexandria City, Pearlham Sporting Club and Capital FC. Those teams formed the backbone of many grainy black and white filmed matches played at archaic, monster sized stadiums such as the Greyhound Road Stadium, and McKill Park, wooden and steel temples to early Xannerian sporting might. Players like Long John Wilkerson and Harrison Pitcairn lead ghost like figures in highlights shown in all sorts of theaters around the blessed Xannerian nation. They became some of the sports first huge names and big stars in the early years of the FLOX. Eventually the first true dynasty came in the form of a team most young Xannerians would be aghast to find competitive. East Rowe FC isn't even in the top teir of the FLOX right now but back in the late 1930s and 1940s they were a fierce team, lead by Starcom Racing sensation Alexander Craigmont and super flexible goalie Harrison Pitcairn, the Roses of East Rowe became the first three time FLOX Omega Division winner, doing so in dominating fashion with each team winning by a margin of 15 points. East Rowe's jersey's of Yellow and Black Stripes are considered fashionable retro classics.

As the 1950s rolled up to the FLOX, times were about to change, while many teams internationally were about to dump the 5 or 4 striker formation, there were the rumblings domestically that would prevent the Xannerians from such moves. None of it had to with football though. Rising tensions between Xannerian and its largest trade partner Tonissia would be a key cog in surprisingly the sporting development of Xanneria. To give you a background story here, Tonissia was a former colonial master of the Xannerian area but eventually gave up control and peacefully gave independence to Xanneria. But in the aftermath, the Tonissians, got deranged and thought retaking the ol Xanneria colony back. A plan to starve the Xannerians and cut their connection to the outside world off, could have worked, but Xanneria had some allies. Two colonies in Atlantian Oceania, were a godsend to the Xannerians, Along with resources not found in Xanneria such as Sugar and copious amounts of certain timberwood, they served as hubs for trade with various AO Nations such as Mriin and the The Royal Kingdom of Quebec. Esportivan nations such as Applachian Nation were also valuable allies in keeping Xanneria a float. One other factor for the Xannerians during the isolationist period, was in the late 60s large swarths of land that had been previously used by the timber industry had been exposed as huge untapped swarth of possible mining resources, thus the 1970s Mining boom in Xanneria did a lot to offset the financial strain that the isolationist period brought.

In the footballing world, a lot of contraction occurred during the the dark days of the Isolationist period. One of the more noted ones being ISC Catalan City. This team was the result of a merger between Island Sporting Club and the Footballing division of the Catalan City Yacht Club, with that merger this left a long standing quirk of Xannerian football down to one. In the early days of FLOX several Yacht clubs established teams, the merger between CCYC and ISC left one remaining. Leyroyce Yacht club or Leyroyce YC still operates to this day. Although Leyroyce YC has been a small town never growing over 150,000 people, they've always had a sturdy fanbase in the town given the grand Maritime tradition of Leyroyce and the Xannerian Navy's man Academic institute being locate din the city. While teams were contracting in FLOX during this time a significant member of modern Xannerian Football was formed. The team known as Galaxy Sporting Club was founded in 1967. in the 70+ years it has existed it has become a mainstay of teams int he top flight of FLOX, although it started as a moderate mid pack team with occasional success to launch it up a level, it wasn't till the post isolationist period though where players from the new Big-8 Alliance started popping up and Galaxy SC did their most damage, a tough fought city derby also arose with Galaxy and rivals Hawthorne Kickers FC and Hawthorne United FC playing some of the fiercest games ever seen in the FLOX. One other team that came up big in the days of the late Isolationist period and early Big 8 period was Orchard Park IFC. A team lead by vivacious Kevin Archer, a young man whose came from some first gen Miners who lander in Lac Shore during the first days of the northern mining boom, he lead the Orchard Park team to heights they had never achieved and have yet to replicate. Orchard's second place finish in 1999 was a monumental surge for the industrial city and gave that community something to hold on to. Though OPIFC has never achieved those heights again, Kevin himself went back to Lac Shore forming the Lac Shore IFC team, the last team to expand into in FLOX's third tier before the big fourth teir expansion of 2033. Lac Shore even breifly was promoted to teir two football but couldn't keep up and next season became relegated. Lac Shore despite a population of only 75,000, has a unique history. It was named because early pioneers in the area believed they were on the coast of a large lake, but only after the founding of the town did they discover the land they saw off int he distance was an Island on the other side of a lake. Historically a fishing village on the Amber Straight, during the 70s it saw a population boon when bauxite mining in the interior of the province of Roberval needed a port to send out resources. Both Lac Shore and Fair Toby became huge ports for mining industry and both expirienced huge growth, now with RD Fair Toby in the mix and the same division as LacShore IFC there could be a good rivalry brewing.

As for the international scene in Xanneria, not much changed in the 80s the 90s or the 00s, but the 10s started seeing a change. No longer competing with the Big-8 teams like Starcom Racing, Appalachian Nation and A Mushroom Kingdom, they started playing non Big-8 teams such as Ethane. In fact Ethane was highly responsible for the Xannerians competing internationally for the first time. In 2018 the Xannerian Maroons competed in their first big international tournament. The Baptism of Fire 69 edition. The Co-Host? Ethane? (And Eastfield Lodge). Despite issues such as poor weather condition, they surpassed all expectations and won the tourniment, making known that the Maroons were here to stay and a force to be reckoned with

(All nations tagged here are either puppets, former nations of mine or were made known of this RP before hand and have given me permission to use their name)

XANNERIA 4
Falcon 48' 60'
Presintino 74' 78'

TAMGU - 3
??? 21'
??? 30'
??? 90+2

BANIJA  5
Kahara 7' 23' 90+1
Jawara 37' 
Ugonna 80' 

XANNERIA - 1
Peralta 63'

by **Cassadaigua** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 11:58 am

Streaking is fun but plenty more to do,
By Rachel Schanke- Forward

You can say that we have been on a roll ever since our 1-1 draw with Main Nation Ministry. Since that match, we have gone a perfect seven-for-seven, taking a hold of a group that is actually quite competitive. They have not all been easy wins, and I don’t think that everything with us is flawless at the moment, but the streak has allowed us to open up a seven point cushion on third place Squidroidia, and four over second place Quebec. Main Nation Ministry is looming in fourth, but they have slowed down a bit since playing us to a draw, and it has hurt them on the group table. The competitive nature of this group shows even further down the table with Electrum and Flavovespia, plus Devonta, all in a position to play spoiler.

This group was labelled the group of death by quite a few people, and we heard all of that talk. During World Cup 85, we were not in such a group, and with two automatic spots, our quick start allowed us to breathe easy, and many think that led to us not being prepared for the World Cup proper, especially with the way that Mriin handled us in the opening game. This time, we would have more hard fought battles against the presumed better teams, so we actually liked the draw. Remaining on the schedule we have some solid tests against Electrum, Main Nation Ministry, and Squidroidia. Others will be scoreboard watching and probably hoping for us to win these games now that the battle for the second position and in the likely playoff that will come for the second place team. Six second place teams do automatically qualify, so they will hope to be one of them, whoever emerges from that pile.

Within this team, chemistry is getting stronger, and we are trying to stay away from the backstory surrounding this team and Preston Newfeld’s kneeling for our national anthem. It is kind of a tough situation for us, because we wish that he could be standing with the rest of us, as even Zack Pierce is standing for the anthem properly. I know that some are calling for him to be removed from the team because of this, and I have to say that as a unit, we continue to support him being a part of our roster, as we are able to look past any of this controversy. It is not something that we talk about while on the field for a game or even in practices, as our focus is on the mission at hand. It may have come up in a conversation or two, but he believes in this cause of his. Even with more and more evidence coming out now that justifies the actions of the officers in that shooting, men’s rights is something that we still need to be talking about in the country. There has been great improvement, but there is still more room for progress.

Our last two games saw us pick up wins at Dagan Airways Stadium, 5-1 over Ihilthracna, and then 1-0 over Wymondham. The first game was very important to us as we did only manage a point when we had traveled to Ihitlhracna earlier in the campaign, in what is really the only “bad” blemish on our record. Results like that happen from time to time, and we did well to put any thoughts they might have had concerning another shock result against us. In that draw, Madison McClain notoriously hit two goalposts in her early struggles to score during the campaign, so it was good to see my fellow forward up front rebound for that and pick up the two first half goals that she did, coming in the 10th and 25th minutes. That sandwiched a goal from Katie Standish in the 16th, something that you will not hear us say all too often. One thing about Cassadagan soccer is that we do not usually have our defenders up too far, therefore their chances to score goals are few and far between. Every now and then, just to change things up and so we cannot be predictable, we will do a set play where one of them sneaks into the offense in an aggressive manner, and on that it was Standish. She did a great job to take advantage of the chance. Later in the game, I would score in the 54th, and Emma McKee, off the bench, scored in the 77th.

I got the match against Wymondham off, as did Meghan Wolcott and a few others as Stephanie Sweeney wanted to get a look at others on the team in more sustained playing time. They did a good job controlling the match, but I did notice that there was some criticism after the fact of Stephanie’s decision to rest so many of the regulars. That criticism is inevitable, but in reality, Kelsey Morgan (who got the start from Tiffany Nelson) only faced one shot on target for the entire match. We had one goal called back because of an offside (correctly called), and had other chances. Perhaps, we were not in sync, but as our goal came in the 13th minute (Loreen Hazen with the tally), the result was never really in doubt.

We’ll be leaving for Electrum very shortly, and hope to continue this very good run that we are on. Everyone is feeling good and the rest that many of us were given for the Wymondham match should only be good as we head into a great sporting nation. We’re not going to take these guys for granted, they have great sporting pedigree, being a former World Cup champion, and it is even a place where the Olympics have been contested. They have underachieved, but as they can still have a shot to finish in a top two spot, we are going to have them play with nothing to lose in this match. We’ll be up for it!

by **Cheergirls** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 12:20 pm

Meghan Banks was feeling very good about the team’s recent results, especially that 1-1 draw against Baker Park. Like, how did that even happen? Baker Park is one of the greatest soccer nations in the world, and they completely dominated the team when they met in Hazel City at the start of the campaign. How in the heck did they go into Baker Park and manage a draw. Sometimes, the results do not make sense, but there is a reason why they actually play the games on the field and do not just produce scores using some kind of weighted random number generator.

Banks smiled. Still, “how in the world did they do that?” A draw, against Baker Park? On the road? She did not really need the explanation, but she began to think it could have had something to do with coach Sarah Drennan’s decision to try and implement some sort of structure in the way they played. The team tried out a couple of systems for the Baker Park match, and it seemed like it would work well. Perhaps then, Drennan was onto something. They knew she was a great cheerleading coach, but could she actually have soccer strategies ready to go too? What Banks did not know is that Drennan was not the one thinking up these strategies, and it was actually the school’s soccer coach behind the scenes. That coach did not want the added work of being a part of this team too, and all the travel that gets associated with it, so they are content with secretly being the mastermind between what Drennan is trying to think up.

Banks and the team were about to head out onto the field for their first practice session for the TOTEL match in Hazel City when Tara Milford came up to her,

“Meghan, my mom and I were talking and we think we should bring back the Cocoa-bo milkshakes.” Milford began.

Banks was surprised by that. She has promised Sir Barsanuphius The Bold in the last World Cup that the team would never, ever, try cocoa-bo milkshakes. She could only look at her teammate in an awkward manner.

“Hear me out, Meghan,” Tara began, “We know how helpful they were for us during the last qualifying campaign and there was all that controversy. But like, that’s done now Meghan. Really, like, no one is even talking about cocoa-bo anymore. You know like when the company talked about all the cocoa-bo references in the last cycle, well like, they are virtually non-existent this time around. But cocoa-bo still exists, and it can still help us and no one will notice because no one is talking about cocoa-bo anymore!”

Banks understood the point, but couldn’t, “I promised Sir Barsanuphius….”

She began to say that before Milford replied, “That guy in the armor? He isn’t even playing anymore!”

Banks nodded, “What ever happened to him? He was becoming a role model and it is like he just disappeared.”

Milford smiled, “Maybe the cure for MARG-20 or whatever they call it, is cocoa-bo milkshakes.”

Banks half-laughed and half-sighed, “That would be ironic.”

Milford, “Yes, they should really test them, but for now, let’s drink them and see how we do in the next two games.”

Banks sighed but was curious, “Yeah, ok, let’s do it.”

Cheergirls then went on to win 4-0 over TOTEL and then 4-0 over West Angola, perhaps their best ever back-to-back results of all-time. Those damn milkshakes. They really do something with this team, don’t they? Of course, they will have a very tough game coming up against Mercedini before playing the not Jessica Murphy-owned Murphtannia side (though Jessica did own them in the first leg as the only scorer in the 1-0 win). It is unclear if they will have the milkshakes again for the away game, as it is too expensive for the families to fly with the players.

by **Ziwana** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 12:39 pm

Part Four

HOW WE WON THE

4TH CMFA CUP

By Charles Payen, Jean Wilder and Abdulaziz Haqawi

The group games

Ziwana 3 - 2 Sharktail

JEAN WILDER

Group stage matches are the hardest part of a tournament. Any wrong result could lead to a team being knocked out of the tournament. As such the first game against Sharktail was very important to Ziwana. With only 2 group stage matches it was must win game. This game would create the momentum that would help us qualify from the group.

CHARLES PAYEN

The Shartail game was a very intense match. About 21,500 Ziwani football fans attended the match in Ruacalu at the 38000 capacity Ruacalu Aksa Stadium. The Ziwani fans outnumbered the Sharktail fans. Our fans tried to use their numbers to give our national team an edge.

ABDULAZIZ HAQAWI

The stadium atmosphere was very lively and intense. The Akambuku fans were beating on drums, dancing and singing. The Sharktail fans though low in number sang their hearts out, praising their players. It was like a contest between the fans who would make the most noise. However Ziwani and Sharktail players were not phased by the noise. Everyone was focused on the task at hand.

JEAN WILDER

The Sharktail players were honestly really good. They kept pressuring our players, forcing us to quickly pass the ball to keep possession. I remember Charles Payen on the left flank trying to cut in, he was forced to attempt a pass to Luis Albert. I think it was Chandra putting pressure on Charles and we he passed the ball, Azmer Ishak intercepted it.

CHARLES PAYEN

When my pass was intercepted i got angry with myself. I knew that my mistake would cost us and cost us it did.

JEAN WILDER

Ishak run with the ball down the left flank, embarrassingly nutmegged Ah Fok and crossed the ball into the penalty area were Gaby headed it in to put them one up. This goal really had my heart pumping I was driven to try and win an equalizer. The same could have been said about my team mates. The Sharktail player had gotten more confident.

ABDULAZIZ HAQAWI

It was difficult going down the left flank or through the midfield. Jean Wilder was unable to get to the ball in time when the ball was lobbed foward. The Sharktail defenders cleared the long balls easily. The Sharktail players were on a high and this caused them to attack more. Big mistake for them, a counter attack was launched by Swedi when a passed the ball to me. I run down the right flank and crossed the ball before the defenders could get to me. Joseph Kawoa got to the ball first, he chested it and blasted it from 40 yards out to equalize. It was an absolutely beautiful and sexy goal.

JEAN WILDER

The equalizer greatly demoralized the Sharktail players. In the second half we took advantage of this and I was able to score 2 goals. As captain I was really happy to contribute to the win. After the game there was much talk about my first goal, I had chipped it over the Sharktail keeper. Harry Ngonamo the manager was really angry, chips can easily be saved. being cheeky in that situation is very dangerous and as captain it showed a terrible image to the other players. I did score the 3rd goal cheekily as well by dribbling past the keeper and walking with the ball into the net but the manager was not as mad with that goal.

by **Flavovespia** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 1:13 pm

The Football Clubs Of Flavovespia

Next on our list is 8 city-regions of the North East. Aside from Barmount, formerly a town in Hadford Hill, all the other 7 are coastal city-regions. There's plenty of hills and cliffs here, in particular in Baxlee to the north, and Croxlich on the East. In contrast, there's the flats of Sutsyridge, Boll Lake and Batchingtonwood. A smaller number of clubs than some of the other areas, with the North East generally made up of lower populated city-regions, indeed Butterfield is the only one of the 8 known for being a notable home to an industry (oil and gas originally, and now biotech and pharmaceuticals)

______________________
Tier 1	Super League
	Croxlich FC Formed: 72BU Stadium: Hillyview (13796) Rivals: Oxwich FC (major) An early city based side, Croxlich is somewhat middling in terms of size and stature. Not a major city-region, but also not one of the notably smaller city-regions of Flavovespia. The club were similar, quite strong in the Eastern Alliance, but struggled against the dominant sides for decades. However during the later years of the Eastern Alliance and the merger, they became successful, topping the United and Eastern Alliance pyramid before a move into the GWNFA pyramid. 5BU also saw them have their first ever GWNFA Super League season, although it ended in relegation. Croxlich have made further Super League appearances, but the majority of their time has been in the Challenge League. They’ve stayed in the top 2 flights for all of the modern era though.
Tier 2	Challenge League
	Butterfield Rovers FC Formed: 70BU Stadium: Fire Park (12822) Rivals: Bavingtor FC, Binclestead Wood FC (minor) Originally Butterfield Independent. Members of the Eastern Alliance from 61BU-37BU, they caused a storm when in 36BU they moved to the United Football League, and won it at their first attempt. They would first play in the GWNFA Super League in 19BU, but could never mount a sustained run in the top tier. In the modern era they were one of the first 3 sides to win promotion to the Super League in 1AU. They’ve had decent spells in the Super League, including a cup win, 2nd and 3rd from 19AU-22AU, but now have fallen back to the second tier.
	Batchingtonwood Rovers FC Formed: 67BU Stadium: Batchingtonwood Park (5697) Rivals: Boll Lake Mariners (major) Formed as just Batchingtonwood FC, they add the Rovers suffix upon their first ground move. Although a city-region side and participant of the Inter City Cup after separating from Sutsyridge city-region in 44BU, their small size meant they struggle to make much of an impact in the classic era. For much of the modern era, they were promoted and relegated between the second and third tiers, but in 27AU they came 2nd in the Challenge League to win promotion to the top flight for the first time ever. Relegation followed, but last year they for the first time ever won the Flavovespia Gold Cup, their greatest honour. Now they’re looking at a ground move to a bigger stadium, and an increased stature.
	Boll Lake Mariners FC Formed: 69BU Stadium: Mariner Stadium (5000) Rivals: Batchingtonwood Rovers FC (major) Originally the factory side of the nautical industry in Boll Lake, Boll Lake Mariners outlasted the short-lived Boll Lake FC, and became the side representing the city. Like their close neighbours Batchingtonwood Rovers, they also struggled in the classic era, their participation in the Inter City Cup from 44BU being a key money maker for them. Boll Lake Mariners have spent a fair amount of the time of the recent decades in the third tier, although they’ve had 8 promotions into the second tier. Furthermore in 21AU, they managed to win the League Cup, the secondary cup competition. Even given the cup’s small status, it was still considered a massive upset.
Tier 3	National League Division 1
	Oxwich FC Formed: 72BU Stadium: Oxwich Road (5838) Rivals: Croxlich FC (major), Oxwich Wood FC (minor) The friendly local rivals to Croxlich, Oxwich had their team form in the same year, and the trajectory of the clubs has been similar for almost all of the classic era. Oxwich however haven’t quite reached the same level of Croxlich, with no major honours, nor a top flight appearance. In the modern era, they spent the first decade in the second tier, before falling into the third tier. Since then they’ve moved between the second and third tiers a few times, but are largely a third tier side, with the additional local pressure of the up and coming Oxwich Wood.
	Oxwich Wood FC Formed: 62BU Stadium: Oxwich Fields (2207) Rivals: Oxwich FC (minor) Out in the west of Oxwich, far from the main built up areas on the sea front lies Oxwich Wood FC. The club had a modest beginning, one of many amateur and later semi-pro sides who made appearances in the Gold Cup, but to little success. Later years saw them occasionally break into the Eastern Alliance and later United and Eastern Alliance pyramid, but the team weren’t an established force by any means. One of the 64 Alliance D2 founders, they won promotion upon the expansion for 8AU, and then in 11AU had their first taste of league football. Ever since then, the club have usually bounced around the Eastern League and Alliance D1. However a good performance in 29AU puts them in the new third tier, and the club is looking ever like equals to Oxwich, rather than little intra-city rivals.
Tier 5	Alliance D1
	Barmount FC Formed: 50BU Stadium: Barmount Park (1930) Rivals: Baxlee Blues (minor) Barmount formed in 50BU, still at the time a small town within Hadford Hill. Originally a member of the Hadford League for much of the classic era, they had ambitions in the modern era of becoming a professional league side, especially when Barmount became a city-region in 8AU. However they were overambitious, and ended up sliding backwards into the Alliance D2. Since then they’ve slowly began to rebuild themselves, aiming to eventually reach their original ambition of the league. Barmount is still one of the few city-regions without ever having a league side.
	Sutsyridge FC Formed: 63BU Stadium: Sutsyridge Stadium (1626) Rivals: Barmount FC, Chesinglea Village (minor) Formed for the purposes of the Inter City Cup, Sutsyridge soon displace Sutsyridge Sellers (who’d go defunct) and Chesinglea Village to become the big side of the city-region. Their halcyon years were 33BU-31BU, with 2 Gold Cup finals and an Eastern Alliance total. They also played in the GWNFA Super League qualifier, but were bottom of the 4 teams and didn’t make it in. They sadly fell away although did make a minor comeback into the United and Eastern League Division 1 by the end of the classic era. Despite being a National Division 2 founder in 2AU, they struggled to assert themselves in the modern era. Sutsyridge have fallen as far as the Alliance D2, and aren’t side they were of the past. The team wear distinctive black and pale green stripes with white shorts.
Tier 6	Alliance D2
	Baxlee Blues Formed: 59BU Stadium: Blue Stadium (1773) Rivals: Barmount FC, Sutsyridge FC (minor) Baxlee Blues formed in 59BU, after the collapse of the once Gold Cup finalists Baxlee-Butterfield. They were an Eastern Alliance side for a while, but gradually drifted back down the ranks, as the merging of the leagues happened. They entered into the Alliance D1 in 3AU, but would fall away back into the Alliance D2. Nevertheless, Baxlee Blues went on some good cup runs, and would get back into the Alliance D1. They still haven’t yet got into the league, but it’s a long-term ambition of theirs.
	Chesinglea Village FC Formed: 74BU Stadium: Chesinglea Avenue (1607) Rivals: Sutsyridge FC, (minor) The village of Chesinglea, within Sutsyridge city-region is home to one of the older teams of the region. Chesinglea Village were founders of the Eastern Alliance, and it was the early decades that the side were probably at their best. The rise of the city sides, especially Sutsyridge meant that Chesinglea couldn’t keep up and fell away to the smaller leagues. They were qualifiers to the Eastern Alliance, but the village side haven’t been able to consistently play at that level. Despite some good cup runs, including once a win away at then Super League side Abbots Lunsel 2-3 in 8AU, Chesinglea Village remain looking back at past good times instead of living in them.
	Sutsyridge Lane FC Formed: 6AU Stadium: Orchid Barton (669) Rivals: none A relatively new side, Sutsyridge Lane FC spent their first 2 decades in the Eastern Amateur League (now Eastern Associate League), and although they won a few times, were on few people’s radars. Then in 28AU, they became the first team outside of the league or Alliance to make it to Round 1 proper of the Flavovepsia Gold Cup. A win in the Eastern Associate League also meant that they began play in the Eastern Alliance D2 for next year. Having stayed up in 29AU, the few hundred dedicated supporters of this small side will hope for more good things to come.

Code: Select all: OOC: Tier 1-4 kit graphics taken direct from my domestic newswire

by **South Newlandia** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 1:35 pm

A traveller’s guide to South Newlandia

Getting around inside South Newlandia isn’t a huge problem, it is often more difficult to arrive in the first place. That’s the case with all islands, but South Newlandia has rather few flights and ships exiting and entering, mostly because of environmental regulations. If you do arrive in South Newlandia, you are likely near the coast or even on an island now; your options are mostly Elephant Valley, Newport, Walstreim, Kinjestad or Ineton. When you arrive, the probably best options are the multiple high-speed trains that can get you almost everywhere in the country fairly quickly. Unless you want to go to a really remote place, you can probably expect your journey to your destination to take two hours at most. If you want to connect between two of the big cities, like from Walstreim to Ratzupalfu, you can expect it to be even quicker. If you don’t like trains, for some reason, there are also busses and cars to rent, but the streets aren’t always in perfect condition, and are far less convenient, to be honest. Flights inland are banned in South Newlandia, with the exception of the daily plane to Dragon Island, flying cargo and people between Masmow and Newport, and back. If you want to be mobile within a city, you can rent bikes for free, or you can take the underground if you are in a bigger city and the bus if the city is smaller. There are also busses and rental cars in the bigger cities, but unless you really need to, we wouldn’t advise you to use them. The bus is slower than the underground, and the underground gets you pretty much everywhere within a city. Cars can get very inconvenient because they are banned in many areas, and where they aren’t, there are rarely any parking spots. Seriously, don’t try to drive a car in South Newlandia. Most of the citizens don’t either; a lot of them don’t even have a license.

The South

The North might feature the two biggest cities in the country, but the next five are all here in the South. The five Southern regions still have less than half of the country’s population, but they are a slightly smaller area too, so that was kind of expected. When we looked at the North, we went from West to East, we will do that again for the South.
All the way to the Southwest, there are a whole bunch of bigger and smaller islands near the South Newlandian coast. Most of these are connected with bridges for easy access by train or bus, but a lot of the beaches are still very beautiful to visit. The biggest city on those islands is Kinjestad (135.000) by far, actually the fifth-biggest South Newlandian city and the biggest outside of the mainland. The city is on the second-biggest South Newlandian Island, behind the Dragon Island, and you are always near the beach here. Kinjestad is another city known for being the centre of South Newlandian medicine, with the Kinjestad Medical School, the biggest university for medicine in South Newlandia, and with the biggest hospital being in the city as well. If you read about an injured football player, for example, chances are they are right here. The city is known also for the marine life that you can observe. That goes for the entire region, according to the general rule of “the smaller, the more marine animals”. Smaller cities of the region include Miladridad (36.000) and the very descriptively named city Quiet (13.000). Quiet is the only South Newlandian city to enforce a mandatory hour of silence between 1 pm and 2 pm, except for emergencies. All that will be audible will be the animals and the wind, if you have the time, you should experience it for yourself. The sports scene of the region is very much dominated by Kinjestad, with Kinjestad Soccer and the Kinjestad SC in soccer, the Kinjestad Peacocks in baseball and the Kinjestad Knights in chess.

When we actually move inland, we arrive to the most rural part of South Newlandia, the Southwest. Despite being one of the biggest in size, there are no actually big cities there and not a lot of small ones either. There is a good reason for that, hardly anything ever happens here. Most of the land here is barely touched, with a lot of forests and lakes and rivers, and lot of wild animals as well. In fact, Rüsselsheim (90.000) is the only bigger city where you have a chance to see an elephant within the city. It doesn’t happen a lot, but every once in a while, there’s just one or a few hanging out near the city limits. As long as you don’t actively anger them, you should be fine. When we move further east in the region, we come near the South Newlandian desert, a place without a lot of vegetation. Unless you like sand a lot, you really don’t need to go there, except if you want to visit Sun City (51.000). Gambling is technically legal in South Newlandia, but hardly anyone does actually gamble for larger sums of money. One of the measures the government took against gambling was to create almost free, government-owned gambling sites, where you can play poker or other cards for money, or bet on your favourite sports teams. Of course, you cannot win a lot this way, but you will not lose a lot of money either. The servers that run this are running on solar power, and are standing right here in Sun City. There are a lot of smaller cities and towns in the region, like Burgh (13.000). Rüsselsheim dominates the sports of the region, with the FC Rüsselsheim in soccer and the Rüsselsheim Blue Sox in baseball, but there are relatively few pro sports teams here.

When we move north a little bit, we reach the region called Southern Central. Along with Northern Central, they are among the two regions without a coastline, three if you count Elephant Valley, the region. Instead, Southern Central contains a lot of the South Newlandian jungle and parts of the mountains, and even more wild animals than the Southwest. Since this region isn’t actually that special, we take the time to talk about South Newlandian drug laws instead, even though this region isn’t particularly important for that. In South Newlandia, all drugs are decriminalized. Addicts and users of drugs can and will not be punished, but people that distribute drugs, or produce/ grow them beyond their own use, can. It is not legal to sell any drug in South Newlandia, including alcohol, nicotine, and marihuana. You can legally import any alcohol, nicotine and marihuana into South Newlandia, as long as you can convince the officials that it is for your own use only. It is basically impossible to bribe South Newlandians in general, and officials are no exception. If you try to bribe officials to help you smuggle and get caught, by far the most likely result, you will likely not be allowed to enter the country at all. In recent times, some people have made a push to make caffeine illegal as well, but at the moment, you can do everything with caffeine that you could do with any other food products, although coffee products are under especially strict control. But back to Southern Central, the biggest city of the region is Ratzupalfu (90.000), pretty much right inside the South Newlandian jungle, it stays hidden until you are almost there. Ratzupalfu was always a city trying to work with nature instead of against it, and it works out fairly well for them. Other cities of the area include Moocha (23.000), a small city specialising in meat production, and Miceton (14.000). This is also another region where one city dominates the sports, with the Ratzupalfu Rhinos competing in football and baseball, along with the Ratzupalfu FC only in soccer.

Moving back towards the Southeast, we reach the region with the shortest name, East. East is actually not that much towards the East, as it stretches fairly far into the mainland, but it also has a big part of the East coast. The biggest part of East is filled with the South Newlandian desert inland, but the part near the East coast of South Newlandia has quite a few cities. This part of South Newlandia is among the most urban, and is also the part with the most shopping centres of South Newlandia. Most of the countries factories are here as well, along with most of the relatively rich people in South Newlandia; but they aren’t rich by basically any other standards. They are typically well off, though. The biggest city in this region is Sophie City (100.000), remarkable for honestly not exactly meeting expectations. There isn’t too much going on here. Smaller cities are St. Riecarn (24.000), a city that used to be full of monks. Eventually, the religion got less relevant, but the name stayed. Still, there are some religious people in here, but they have mostly given up on attempting converting people. Smaller cities also include Ostreka (12.000) and Bobtown (10.000). In this region, Sophie City is the most important one for sports, with the Sophie City Royals in football and the Sophie City Girls in baseball and chess.

The last remaining regions is one of the smallest by area, but still features two of the big South Newlandia cities. The region contains nothing but the very South-eastern bit of the main land, and two islands further south. Walstreim (225.000), the biggest city in South Newlandia, is located here in the mainland, and it dominates this part of South Newlandia. Walstreim features the only business university in South Newlandia, the WBU, and is the heart of South Newlandian business together with Newport. It shares a few more similarities with Newport; Walstreim has the second-biggest port in South Newlandia, and, of course, the Lions. The Walstreim Lions are a very important part of the culture of Walstreim. The Lions are the only one to have teams in soccer, baseball and chess all at once. Almost everyone here is a big fan of the Lions, and their recent success has made the city happy. Further south, there is Ineton (75.000) on a moderately sized island off of the coast. There are some nice beaches here, but in general, the city is not very interesting; it is basically just a less exciting and less important version of Kinjestad. Ineton is also notorious for having terrible sports teams, and nothing ever seems to work out for them. There is no good reason to visit the island. Another local sight is the small town of Y (8.000), the place with the shortest name of South Newlandia. We already mentioned the Lions, who are literally everywhere, but there are more football teams, namely the Walstreim City FC, the FC Ineton and Ineton City, along with the Ineton Pawns in chess.

Snippets from current news:

The curse is broken!
The Elephants have done it; the Snowy Owls have fallen! After many defeats and failed attempts, South Newlandia has defeated Tikariot with an awesome late comeback in the Elephant Dome, thanks to two late goals, and are now back somewhat in contention for the playoffs, also thanks to a solid draw in Filindostan. It’s still a long shot, and the team needs to make the next step in the very next game week against Se Vende Skooma, the already eliminated team we lost to, and in the Natanians and Nosts.

The best animals, ranked (according to us)
5. Ducks
Ducks make the list also because they feature all three terrains, the can swim, fly, and walk. Few animals combine all of those. Ducks are also great because of the quacking sound they make, and because they are generally very chill. Also, have you ever seen a baby duck?
4. Cats
Cats probably wouldn’t care they are on this list. Cats don’t care about us, you, or anyone, they just do whatever they please, and we clean up behind them. In fact, pushing stuff off of things sounds like an excellent method to deal with anger, and we do wish we should try it out. Despite the fact that cats act like they do not care about anyone, they still love us. You can tell, and it’s worth the scratches you will be getting. Meow!
3. Goats
This horned sheep is another fantastic animal. Their noises are great, and they absolutely look perfect in our opinion. The horns are also awesome, of course, and can you imagine climbing like a skilled goat can? Plus, they aren’t dangerous either, and they literally eat grass. Baby goats deserve a mention of their own, those things are unbelievably cute.
2. Dogs
What do we all always want? It is being loved, and a dog will give that to you. Dogs are the best friends you can possibly get, and they are smart enough to be taught tricks, and different to cats, also willing to learn them. Have we mentioned puppies? There is also a kind of dog for everyone. Maybe you like small dogs, maybe you like medium dogs, and maybe you like massive dogs. From this list, dogs are the best animals to own as a pet. Go get a dog, and have a friend for a long time. It’s a shame they don’t get as old as they deserve to get.
1. Elephants
Do we really have to say more? You knew this was coming. Elephants are smart, they form strong bonds, and they are just really cool. Look at the trunk, look at those massive ears, look at the tusks, and look at this trunk again! This thing is absolutely awesome. Have we mentioned that these bad boys are really big? They are. Still, they would never intentionally harm another animal. Have we mentioned baby elephants? They are really big for being so small at the same time. Watching them learn to use their trunk is awesome. Elephants are awesome. They also make the objectively best sound out of all animals.

Honarable mentions include Owls, Dolphins, Horses and many more. Actually, most animals are great.

South Newlandia 3-1 Tikariot (61’ McCabe (Assist Irving) 81’ Li (Assist McCabe) 84’ McMora (Assist Irving) - ‘ McTierney (Assist Cumbernauld)
South Newlandia: Trischuk – Roy, Anderson, O’Neill, Wright – Lancaster, Li, McMora, Wallis (45’ Bishop) – Irving, McCabe
Tikariot: Chatelet – Dunlap, Knox, Coronello, Liniack – Cumbernauld, McNair, McTierney – Grimaud, Haney, Aspinall
Man of the match: Simon McCabe (South Newlandia)

Filindostan 0-0 South Newlandia ( - )
South Newlandia: Trischuk – Roy, Anderson, O’Neill (45’ Gurero), Wright – Lancaster, Li (80’ Mohamed), McMora, Wallis (45’ Bishop) – Irving, McCabe (67’ Glossman)
Man of the match: (Filindostan)

Next up: South Newlandia vs. Se Vende Skooma (Walstreim City Stadium); Natanians and Nosts vs. South Newlandia
Table situation: Slightly less bad now, still not great
Planned starting eleven: Rigby, Roy, Sloah, Anderson, Wright – Mohamed, Li, McMora, Bishop – McCabe, Irving

by **Sargossa** » Wed Sep 16, 2020 1:39 pm

It was more a ripple than a spontaneous outburst but it grew in breadth and volume until all four stands were having a small celebration. The crowd’s élan hadn’t been caused by anything on the pitch, Sargossa still led Transvolcanic and were looking relatively comfortable. The VIP box at El Torrigal was operating a little behind the cheap seats. Hernán Sandoval turned to the man seated to his left.

‘What just happened?’

Luís Molina was already scrolling through his phone. He had an inkling but now sought the confirmation. He paused his finger movements as he found the evidence of exactly what he had suspected. He pointed the screen at Sandoval.

‘Staypuftonia have scored.’

So that was it. Far far away. Wherever the hell Staypuftonia had hidden itself, tucked safely away from World Assembly overcite, a goal had been scored. Significantly it had been scored against The Sarian. Added to that Sandoval had noticed that Vilita too were also dropping points, being held as they were away to The Golden Throne. Under normal circumstances, had all the matches finished as they now were, Sandoval would consider that a thoroughly decent day’s work. Gaining two points on Vilita and three on The Sarian could only be a good thing. Surely. Except these were not normal circumstances. The Corsairs were so far behind their two rivals that it would barely make a dent. They’d still be seven behind Vilita and eight behind The Sarian. Despite the minor improvement Sandoval couldn’t help feel that this race was already run.

Below him Sargossa national coach Juan José Barreto sat in his dugout. Sandoval grimaced. Partly because the Football Federation president hated coming to this damned stadium. It seemed to be perennially chilly in Torreón and the altitude always gave him a throbbing headache. And partly because he knew he was going to fire Barreto. It didn’t fill him with any kind of satisfaction, he liked the coach on a personal level and when the FFS sacked a coach it was an admission of failure on their part.

But at this point there was little choice. When Sandoval had implemented his ‘Back to Basics’ initiative, an attempt to reboot the national side’s flagging fortunes. It had worked too, with an unprecedented seven successive trips to the World Cup and a highest ever position in the global rankings. That the run would end was inevitable. Unfortunately for Juan José Barreto the run ended on his watch. It was disappointing but not entirely unexpected. An Olympic medal would have softened the blow but when winning just one of the final two games would have guaranteed just that the side failed again. Losing the semi to Vilita was forgivable. Losing the bronze medal match to Greater Vakolicci Haven was less so.

But the Federation had elected to give the coach a stay of execution. Two games later the Federation’s Executive Board were summoned to an emergency meeting. Again, the coach survived. Nineteen points from the next twenty-one available helped Barreto’s cause. Two games later they were summoned to another meeting. Following up a capitulation in the capital at the paws of Vilita with a second defeat to The Sarian left The Corsairs a long, long way behind. Ironically that’s what earned Barreto another stay of execution. Sandoval and Elite Football Director Luís Molina came to the conclusion that a change of coach wouldn’t make any difference at this stage. They could win every game from here on in and still fall well short of the top two. Nine points behind Vilita, eleven behind The Sarian and having played them both twice. No, that’d let the campaign play out and quietly release Barreto at the end of it. Molina was already putting together a shortlist of candidates, having been given the nod by Sandoval to consider more cosmopolitan options as well as the usual domestic candidates.

Sandoval glanced down towards the dugout again. He shook his head. He couldn’t help but sympathise. For a football coach being put in charge of their national team was the ultimate achievement. But for Juan José Barreto this campaign had now become a protracted sacking.

World Cup 86: Roleplay Thread

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