Copa Rushmori XXXV - Everything Thread

[Astograth]

COPA RUSHMORI XXXV
Matchday 3

Group A
Olastor 0–0 Crystalline Caverns
Nethertopia 0–0 Yuezhou

Group A                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Savojarna              2   2  0  0    5   3  +2    6
2 Yuezhou                3   1  1  1    6   6   0    4
3 Olastor                3   1  1  1    3   3   0    4
4 Crystalline Caverns    2   0  1  1    0   1  −1    1
  Nethertopia            2   0  1  1    0   1  −1    1

Group B
Plane of Possibility 0–2 Taeshan
Pedestrian States 1–1 Ostralo

Group B                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Pasarga                2   2  0  0    5   1  +4    6
  Plane of Possibility   3   2  0  1   10   6  +4    6
3 Taeshan                2   1  0  1    2   2   0    3
4 Pedestrian States      2   0  1  1    3   6  −3    1
5 Ostralo                3   0  1  2    4   9  −5    1

Group C
Pridnestrovia 1–1 Oberour Ar Moro
Mavinet 3–1 Ancharmunn

Group C                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Eura                   2   2  0  0   10   2  +8    6
2 Pridnestrovia          3   1  2  0    2   1  +1    5
3 Mavinet                2   1  0  1    3   2  +1    3
4 Oberour Ar Moro        2   0  1  1    2   6  −4    1
5 Ancharmunn             3   0  1  2    2   8  −6    1

This matchday’s simple writing prompt: What is your favourite match in Copa Rushmori history, which doesn’t involve your nation? Why is it meaningful? Is this a common sentiment in your nation, or just one character’s opinion?

[Kalosia]

A selection of today's headlines from one of Kalosia's leading newspapers, La Gažetë di Monterë:
Note: In the Kalosian canonical universe, RL nations exist as well.

OPINION COLUMN
Li Krešenti needs morale, too
by Andreo Baľarti
Despite the government's claim that our inaugural participation in Copa Rushmori was to "boost the nation's morale", it seems like the move was no more than a symbolic gesture. Although the team have been given the clearance to leave the country for Astrograth, the same cannot be said for thousands of Kalosian football fans who normally can be found supporting the team wherever they are invited to play. As a result, stadiums in Astrograth are devoid of spectators from Kalosia, and the Crescents are playing in conditions worse than an empty stadium. No, instead they are playing surrounded by thousands of people supporting their opponents, without the support to balance out the opponent's fans. My point is simple: if the government could not lift restrictions quickly enough to allow for mass travel to Copa Rushmori hosts Astrograth and Savojarna, they should not be fielding a team in the competition at all. [READ MORE]

OPINION COLUMN
Football and Freedom: Revisiting the Little-Known Role of Sport in Kalosia's Political History
by Martino Ferer
As we have seen in the Ivory Coast, football can reunite warring sides in conflict. As we have seen in the Balkans, football can exacerbate tensions as well. In the Kingdom of Kalosia, the introduction of football in the late 19th century allowed large groups of people, unhappy with the monarch's policies, to mobilize and ultimately overthrow the regime, giving rise to the Republic of Kalosia as we know it today. [READ MORE]

Roberta Rikardi to represent Kalosia at the World Hit Festival, song revealed
MONTERË, KALOSIA — In a televised special, Radiu-Televižio Kalosia revealed that city pop singer Roberta Rikardi will represent Kalosia at the 53rd World Hit Festival in Bovingdon, Britonisea. The song she will sing is titled Komë molti ani fa (Like many years ago). [READ MORE]

[Yue Zhou]

Thorsborg, Savojarna
Three hours after the match against Olastor

---

Huang Shedong looked down at the cards he'd been dealt. Two Jacks stared at each other. Huang flipped the cards back down, then tossed a few of his chips into the middle of the table. "Bet...fifty yuebi."

That made it Wen Xiaohui's turn to act. She glanced at her own cards, then at Huang Shedong, then back at her cards, before flipping a few more chips toward him. "Raise. Two hundred." Behind her, Wang Bo and Li Jing got out of the way, leaving just Huang and Wen against each other. Huang reached over to the deck, and dealt out three smaller cards. With his jacks still not threatened, Huang opted to bet fifty more, to which Wen raised two hundred more.

Huang stared balefully at the cards before deciding to let them go. Wen briefly clenched her fist, before grinning and turning over a three and a six.

"You're betting four hundred on that? Seriously?"

"It's that Hinodejin money," offered Wang Bo. "Girl gets one foreign contract and suddenly she's throwing all her meal money on a three and a six." Li and Huang chuckled.

Wen shrugged. "Nothing stopping you guys from getting a foreign contract. The money's way better than what the Yuezhou Premier League is offering. Doesn't hurt that Kita-Hinode isn't, you know, sexist."

"I'd never leave Jiangdong. I'm only the player I am because of their academy, and besides, it's where I was born and raised," countered Li Jing. "Plus, even if the money's better, it's way more expensive to live somewhere without all of Yuezhou's public services, and I would get homesick."

"Well, I guess it's different when most of your family has fled the country already," Wen Xiaohui noted. "But at this rate, the YPL's just going to turn into a one-team league anyways. Did you guys hear that Yincheng is getting money directly from Ren Qiang now? It's only a rumor, of course-"

"Fucking bullshit if it's not though," interjected Huang. "And, honestly, no Yuezhou team can afford international players from anywhere. Did you guys hear they're signing Askari internationals now? Cirvante and Caragin?"

"And there's no way Han Jian would've signed with them if they didn't give him a huge new contract. He played for Guodui, their crosstown rivals! Either their owner is overpaying everyone to get them to come, or they're getting backdoor money from the government," lamented Wang Bo.

"Yeah, well, Ren Qiang wants a Yuezhou team to do well in all the international competitions. I guess it helps if there's only one good team from Yuezhou."

"Well, it's not too late to leave before Yincheng makes you an offer you can't refuse, is all I'm saying," Wen said, before looking down at her cards again. "Raise three hundred."

"Come the fuck on."

MD3: Nethertopia 0-0 Yuezhou
Lineup: Ruo; Kang, Ren (Zhu 73), Guo, Zhuang, Qiu; Yang (Gao 79), Gu, Chen (Li 55); Huang, Liu
Player Ratings: Ruo 9; Kang 8, Ren 7, Guo 7, Zhuang 8, Qiu 7; Yang 5, Gu 6, Chen 4; Huang 6, Liu 6

[Falkyr]

Sylvi, lead comms officer of Skysreach, sighed as the wire came in. "Well, we're dead in the water."

Matthias, the intern, recoiled in his chair. "W-what? Are there sanctions coming in?? Are the Euran forces at Helving mobilizing??? I thought we'd gotten the CRC off our backs when we lightened up on the Falconians!"

"N-no, I'm just talking about the Copa."

"O-oh. Of course. What happened? Were you watching it?"

"On the job? Of course not. I just saw the final score come across. We drew the damn Kalactanians nil-nil."

"Oh, that is a bad result."

"No shit. Logria's an old name, but they're washed up, we needed a result against them. Got nothing for it. Then this random pocket of Kalactanian colonists can still hold us. I wonder if Imriška has just been beaten to hell playing in Nephara..."

"I guess. Cranequin barely stayed in the Premiership, they were probably working her to the bone, and they've got that awful season that's like fifty games."

"I still don't get why this whole colony fad thing is so big right now. The Eurans take over some wasteland in AO and suddenly everyone and their mother needs their own 'overseas territory.' If the CRC had any sense they'd go about stomping out these blatant attempts at power grabs from other regions within their borders, instead of fussing with how we run our own country."

"I mean, they kinda had a point. We were turning the Falconian cities into slums, that's hardly fair on them."

"And was it fair on us that we got saddled with ten million refugees out of the blue?! That we got them all under roofs was a miracle and they should be fucking grateful."

Sylvi continued tapping away at her terminal, waiting for Matthias to continue the banter. But the response never came. She quickly glanced over at his desk, and--aw shit the Queen is standing right there.

"Still so bitter, Sylvi? That's depressingly unprofessional." Alyssiana took a step closer, resting her hand on the back of Sylvi's chair in such a fashion that her feathered cape flourished about. "I really expected more of you. I need it to be very clear that everyone in my administration is working for the betterment of the Falconian peoples, who now share an intertwined fate with our own. We cannot succeed without their success, as our sensitivity training should have taught you. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, my liege." Sylvi held back the gulp her body was so desperately trying to do; maintaining eye contact with the Queen was essential in dialogues like this. "Crystal."

"Good." Another cape flourish and the Queen was on her way out of the room. But she'd stop at the door, and shout over her shoulder: "Tell Dagmar to get his shit together. If we don't beat the Dagans he's fired."

[Savojarna]

For the third time, here is your cutoff for groups D-F!

Group D
The Askari Union 2–0 Eastfield Lodge
Southwest Eastnorth 1–1 Graintfjall

  Group D                          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Graintfjall                        3   2  1  0    3   1  +2    7
2 Southwest Eastnorth                2   1  1  0    6   4  +2    4
3 Astograth                          2   1  0  1    1   1   0    3
4 The Askari Union                   3   1  0  2    5   6  −1    3
5 Eastfield Lodge                    2   0  0  2    0   3  −3    0

Group E
Falkyr 1–5 Cassadaigua
Logria 1–1 Kalactanian Rushmore Territories

  Group E                          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Cassadaigua                        2   2  0  0    9   2  +7    6
2 Logria                             2   1  1  0    2   1  +1    4
3 Nephara                            2   1  0  1    8   5  +3    3
4 Kalactanian Rushmore Territories   3   0  2  1    2   8  −6    2
5 Falkyr                             3   0  1  2    1   6  −5    1

Group F
Valladares 3–1 Darmen
Kalosia 0–1 Rea San Vegas

  Group F                          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Valladares                         3   3  0  0    9   2  +7    9
2 Darmen                             2   1  0  1    2   3  −1    3
3 Sargossa                           2   1  0  1    4   1  +3    3
4 Rea San Vegas                      3   1  0  2    1   6  −5    3
5 Kalosia                            2   0  0  2    1   5  −4    0

[Falkyr]

"What the fuck do you mean I'm the manager now?" Sjurd shouted, as the fourth Dagan goal rolled past Bronimir.

[Graintfjall]

As I was not able to find Southwest Eastnorth’s RP permissions I have left the details on their side vague, and will change any of the details herein should they wish. Given the nature of the bloggers, it’s safe to assume all such details are provisional anyway.

Article posted on the optimistic fan blog, www.GlassHalfFull.græ

The first half goal proves we are the best team in the tournament

An untroubled Græntfjall cruised on towards Round of 16 qualification (just the first step on the inevitable path to Copa Rushmori, and in time World Cup, glory) as they maintained their unbeaten record. As Raphaelsson’s left boot struck a scorching volley, it seemed as though no one in the world could stand against this team; as the ball swerved through the ranks of defenders trying to deal with another whipping Bríana Noahsdóttir corner and crashed into the top corner of the net, it confirmed an utter Græntfjaller ascendancy almost in danger of becoming passé.

The Snow Wolves’ domination from corners is quickly becoming the talk of the footballing world, and Southwest Eastnorth’s center back pairing duly cowered at their assignment of trying to cover Ralf Álfarsson and Vilbjörn Hjörleifursson. They managed, just about, to bundle the ball away to the edge of the box, only for the young Græntfjaller left midfielder to swoop in and hammer in his shot. The Snow Wolf Pack was celebrating from the moment the crisp connection with his laces sounded: actually watching the ball arc into the goal was unnecessary, so certain was the outcome.

Such a sweet strike would not recur: Jason Þórhallursson wasn’t quite able to connect with the several chances he was provided with by the rampant Amanda Guttisdóttir in midfield, but the regular offensive threat was enough to cow the Southwest Eastnorth team into abject submission. (Apart from all the chances they generated, but that’s a minor blip.) Indeed, so total was the level of control that Sigtryggur Brynjólfursson was able to give a debut appearance off the bench to Sara Kristoffersdóttir, who put in a couple of good attacking runs and proved how immensely deep the veins of talent run back home.

To win yet another match 1-0 – the fourth, consecutively, since our international debut – would have been simply showing off. A regional tournament is as much about winning friendships as winning games, and although Græntfjall should be able to do both in spades, yielding up a draw was the sporting thing to do, giving remaining group games the veneer of competitive spice, even if it’s already obvious who will come out on top once they’re played.

Article posted on the pessimistic fan blog, www.GlassHalfFullOfPiss.græ

The second half goal proves we are the worst team in the tournament

Unable to hold on to the slender lead they scratched out through a fluke chance, just about the only shot the team managed to get into the same postcode as the Southwest Eastnorth goal for the entire ninety minutes, Græntfjall succumbed to a dispiriting and miserable draw that all but consigns their hopes of qualification to dust, with half their groupmates capable of passing them based on remaining matches. That will almost certainly happen – with the ‘almost’ necessary only as a hedge in case the No Wolves somehow conspire to find some even more inept and calamitous way of knocking themselves out.

Referees have – finally – noticed that the team’s struggles to keep pace with international football has led to the defensive unit – at times numbering just about every player on the pitch, bar the turgid Jason Þórhallursson, too busy sulking over missing yet another three-metre tap-in to trudge back and assist his flailing teammates – trying to wear the opposition forwards as shirts. More fetching shirts, indeed, than the ugly blue blotches passing for a national kit at present. A much-deserved penalty for a move that would be more suited to the judo tournament of the upcoming Orean Olympic Games (where Græntfjall is fielding several, no doubt doomed, patsies to serve as little more than kindling to be swept aside in the path to medals of actual judokas) signaled the end of Græntfjaller pretensions to the lead; Southwest Eastnorth duly converted; the rest is history.

Or will be, soon. This is a team more suited to the junkyard of oblivion than the annals of time – and certainly than the Round of 16 (so named, perhaps, because there are 16 teams who could roundly beat Græntfjall in this tournament alone). Stringing out their macabre evisceration at the hands (and feet) of actual footballers is only prolonging the misery. Given the fundamental inability of this team to put together more than two passes, to commit a tackle without auditioning for the Rugby League World Cup or Arena Bowl, or, in Sara Kristoffersdóttir’s case, to even lace up her own boots correctly, it would be a waste of money to even buy tickets home. Just order up a guy with a shotgun to put them, and us, out of our misery.

Taking incompetence to new heights, the team will not even play a match during the next round of fixtures. Ignore those talking about byes and rest days: it’s clear the organizers have decided to just shunt Græntfjall from the schedule as the sight of their dire attempts at putting one foot in front another becomes too much for TV audiences to bear. And kudos to those organizers: now if only they cleared out the rest of their schedule too (admittedly, certain to be only one remaining match) we could all conclude this farce with some meagre shred of dignity left.

[Southwest Eastnorth]

Umberto Tipoli wasn't you usual sporting personality in Southwest Eastnorth. He was 67, so in sport where running back and forth even as a coach is still not for the older generation. At 67 he had traveled the world he had been to places few have ever been, old world powers many only hear about in books and more importantly to the plot, he was a Tonissia native.

Southwest Eastnorth is a Rushmori nation that is when you think about it, just plane insane. Founded after an underground movement of hundreds upon hundreds of great migration of hundreds upon hundreds of thousands of people managed to dupe an entire government with some well time d cruise ships and cargo ships. Now-a-days Southwest Eastnorth is thriving! An inland desert full of Oil and mining goodness has driven an insane amount of growth in the area existing between the legacy nations of Anterola and Queer Poco el Moro Ara. Untill the find an additional nation southwest of there coastal clams it's all up to exploration and an economy driven by the resources infinitely (for now) abundant.

But back to the story of ol' Umberto. Umberto was born in a moderately sized city in Tonissia's prominent David River Valley called Rothwood. In this town Rothwood High School became an unstoppable force in the local scene, one game say Umberto score 8 goals in a 12-0 thrashing of a smaller rural school in the south of the state. Granted this was 1970, This was already when things had started to go downhill for Tonissia. Squabbling with a nation known as Wrecker (Now more commonly referred to as Wreckeria) over territorial rights over a mining rich land called "Tundra" had lead to the deteriorating mental state of the nations leader. He didn't realize it at the time but when he went pro in 1971 the writing was already on the wall.

One of the most popular teams in Tonissia was Chesterfield, Tonissia based "Team Virginia". For those who don't know, Virginians were the main ethnicity of Tonissian population and the Virginian Pine is still seen on the flag of Southwest Eastnorth and the flag of former Tonissian colony Xanneria, who at the early 70s (early 1980s in the Xannerian calendar, we're still not sure how they got to be 10 years off). Team Virginia for the last 5 or so years had been a hyped machine promoted seemingly by the Tonissian government as propaganda, so when in 1972 a 19 year old Umberto got a chance to play them many people thought he'd get pushed over and Team Virginia would blitz the Castle Davidia team Tipoli had signed with.

In the end a Tipoli goal won the game for Castle Davidia in the 92nd minute, but a shower of boos came, and with it a shower of glass. The writing was on the wall, Tipoli knew it was more than just some "random Ultras" It was a PR machine from the highest powers in the land. The Team Virginia was meant as a training ground for "young Tonissian talent" but it was something a bit more. One of his teammates later in that season announced at a mere age of 24 that he would retire. This was Brock Thurmunster a Castle Davidia goalkeeper. Umberto had no clue why as when he heard the news he himself was boarding a plane to Rorysville. A Forgotten nation in the far north of a forgotten region known as "Simtropolis". He didn't mind the colder temps there, he was just glad his agent got him out of the shitshow known as "Tonissia". Heck even ol' Umberto got his agent to come with him to Rorysville, where the agent would later become a naturalized citizen of that nation.

While playing a couple years later he was reading a paper after match he played in Rorysville he noted the Copa Rushmori. He saw a new nation in there "Southwest Eastnorth" He read a line int he paper that made him jump up and pay attention.

...and the keeper for the squad representing the new nation of Tonissian ex-pats, was poor,poor Brock Thurmunster who struggled in a 5-2 loss to Kernansquillec

Neither the 7-1 Pasarga win nor the game in which Kernansquillec victory that resulted in a shootout result of 15-14 budged the Tonissian as much as him finding his ol' teammate in this new land. SO after some investigation into the Rushmori region he discovered Southwest Eastnorth and again he was on a plane to find glory, but for him this Southwest Eastnorth was the peaceful Tonissia he always wanted. Now he gets to lead a team of young second generation Virginias, and other assorted players to glory in international stage. In the city of White Sock lie three teams Colome Range named after the wonderful mountains the city the town is nestled in, Grandal WIld, in the suburbs known as Grandal, and White Sock United, the most well known of the teams in White Sock. WSU Became that glorious team thanks to Tipoli coaching. His reward? the wonderful Tipoli Stadium, a 22,000 seater named after him.

While he's still active this stint as coach of the national team is the world to him right now, he gets to face monsters such as Astograth and Eastfield Lodge, and he gets to prove Tonissian might when Tonissia no longer could.

Umberto Tipoli Stadium - White Sock, SWE

[Rea San Vegas]

First win for Rea San Vegas
The first win for Rea San Vegas we showed alot of character out there on the pitch

[Savojarna]

SavojarSports.sj - inside reports from all Savojarna
Victory over Olastor enough to secure group victory

By Jaukka Halanen
A dull matchday, ending in two 0-0 draws, may not have been what the organisers, neutrals, or fans of the other Group A teams had hoped for as Savojarna took a day off on their bye day and visited a reservation in Norderholmen, taking pictures with Great White Dragon cubs and handing out autographs to local schoolchildren volunteering at the station. For the home fans, however, the dreary play was a delight as it resulted in a situation that sees Savojarna already close to securing qualification.

In their upcoming game in Thorsborg, Savojarna beating Olastor would be enough to see them through for certain, and could even secure the group victory as it would leave Savojarna with nine points, as no other side can still reach more than seven. Yuezhou have a day off tomorrow, meaning that they will inevitably remain at least two points behind the Savojars, whereas Crystalline Caverns and Nethertopia are tied on one. This means that even with a draw against Olastor, the Northlights are certain to tie for first; however, assuming a victory for Yuezhou in their final game and two wins for Nethertopia, this could result in a hard-to-resolve three way tie. Such a tie would likely come down to goal difference, where the Savojars currently lead the pack, but this would certainly change in the run-up to this hypothetical scenario.

As historically, seven points out of four games were typically enough to belong to the three qualifying third-placed sides, a draw could still be considered securing qualification (and it would do so mathematically if Nethertopia fail to beat the Crystalline Caverns). However, looking at the bracket and the other teams in the Copa, Savojarna would strive to win their group. With Eura and Pasarga on track to winning theirs, a third place would risk an octofinal against one of these giants; a second place risks being drawn with Taeshan (likely to come second behind Pasarga), Darmen or Sargossa (tied on three points in group F), or somewhat surprisingly, Nephara, who struggled after being beaten by a sharp-looking Cassadaigua.

We have learned six years ago during the Copa Rushmori 32 that winning your group can backfire, as back then, the knockouts were unusually hard as Savojarna faced first Cassadaigua and then Eura in a monumental matchup that resulted in a 3-2 victory for the Euran side. This is never avoidable, as there is always a risk of a favourite stumbling, but so far it looks like in this edition, favourites are actually largely delivering - making winning our group all the more important. Mikaela Rangren is aware of the relevance of the Olastor game, saying to us: “Of course I am aware that there is some leeway for the next match, but we’re professionals and we always want to win our game. And I can promise you that I, and the entire team, will sleep a whole lot better if we have nine points on our name and secured qualification, or even group victory. The fans are amazing and they deserve an all-out performance by us as well”.

Indeed, fans have been an incredible support for this Savojarna side throughout the entire Copa, selling out the stadia for all Savojar games and putting on brilliant showpieces. Savojarna has truly united behind the Northlights, who in turn showed convincing games, not letting themselves be worn down by the spirited offence of Yuezhou in the Sjoedrhavn opener and carefully grinding down the Crystalline Caverns’ defence in their second match, resulting in a 1-0 victory that could not have been more Savojar. Both victories were widely celebrated, and Captain Victoria Maersk has shown her appreciation after the defeat of the Crystalline Caverns by participating in a fan chant.

For the upcoming clash with Olastor, Maersk revealed no tactical changes. However, there will be two forced changes as Flemming Skov has conceded a second yellow card against the Crystalline Caverns, and Arvid Jotansson is still nursing a muscular injury on his upper left thigh that he has received in the final training before the Crystalline Caverns game. Jotansson has been playing the first half of that game, cleared by the doctors to play with a painkiller injection, but will not be on the field against Olastor, being replaced by Simon Jacobsen instead. Nurkanen is the expected alternative on the right wingback position, although putting Thorvaldsson on the somewhat unusual right side has been flouted as a possibility by some pundits. The game, for those who have not managed to acquire a ticket, is scheduled to kick off at 18:00, and will be shown live on STV2 and in the SavojarSports.sj liveblog.

[Trans-Dniesters]

ПРИДНЕСТРОВСКАЯ ЦЕНТРАЛЬНАЯ НОВОСТИ АГЕНЦИЯ • PRIDNISTROWISCHE ZENTRALE NACHRICHTENAGENTUR • AGENȚIA CENTRALĂ DE ȘTIRI TRANSNISTREANĂ • PRIDINYESTER MERKEZI HABER AJANSI • PRIDNESTROVIAN CENTRAL NEWS AGENCY

IS WERNER CEAUSESCU STILL THE RIGHT MAN FOR PRIDNESTROVIA TODAY?
By Gustav Tyumenov


Pridnestrovian men's national football team manager Werner Ceausescu observes proceedings during Pridnestrovia's match against Oberour Ar Moro in the 35th Copa Rushmori.

HOVIKKÄRA, SUMANEN, SAVOJARNA - Pridnestrovia remains in contention for the 35th Copa Rushmori following their second consecutive draw in the tournament, a 1-1 draw against Oberour Ar Moro. The result sees Pridnestrovia currently sitting in second place in Group C, behind leaders and defending Copa Rushmori winners Eura, who currently have a game in hand on the Red Army. Eura is also Pridnestrovia's next and final opponent for the group stage, with the Red Army set to sit out the final matchday of the group stage by way of a bye day.

It is always difficult for any team to be in a position similar to Pridnestrovia's in the current Copa Rushmori, which is to be the team to have the bye day on the final matchday of the group stage of any given tournament. Such a situation puts the team's hopes for qualification into the playoffs completely out of their hands, or at least ninety percent out of their hands. Oftentimes at this stage of the tournament, the team already has an idea whether they are going to make it out of the group stage or not based on how they have performed in the previous games. But right now, Pridnestrovia's position in the Copa Rushmori is precarious. Yes, Pridnestrovia sit second in Group C, but they are second only by way of one win and two draws, with their final game of the group stage set to be against a Eura side who have been steamrolling their way through the competition since day one. Twice Eura played, and twice they won by a score of 5-1. And with Pridnestrovia's offense seemingly misfiring from the start, there is a likelihood of this same scoreline being repeated once again. The Red Army's defense has been stalwart from the beginning though, and they will surely have prepared for Eura's attacking threat, but as we have learned, the game of football is more than ready to throw a surprise or two at even the most watchful of spectators and pundits.

The question now on everyone's lips: is Werner Ceausescu still the right man to lead Pridnestrovia to the Copa Rushmori? There are a few important factors that we have to consider when answering this question, of course. On the one hand, Ceausescu definitely has a winning pedigree: he led CSKA Tiraspol to back-to-back Pridnestrovian Super League titles in the 2011-12 and 2012-13 seasons before he accepted the offer of the Pridnestrovian Football Union to manage to men's national team for the 58th Baptism of Fire. There in the Equestrian States, Ceausescu took the Red Army all the way to the final only to be defeated by the Hakifao Federation. Ceausescu would eventually follow these up with a semifinals appearance at the 27th Copa Rushmori, where Pridnestrovia were defeated by, interestingly enough, Eura, and then lost the third place playoff to Nephara on penalties. Ceausescu and Pridnestrovia would eventually get to lift their first ever piece of international silverware with victory against Rhineland Sued in the final of the 3rd Global Cup of Soccer in the Second Brazilian Empire. On the other hand though, Ceausescu followed up his triumph in Brazilia with a lackluster qualifying campaign for the 79th World Cup, with a 3-2 victory over Brenecia serving as the only highlight in an otherwise forgettable campaign. Ceausescu also took an extended sabbatical from football itself following his dismissal from the managerial position by the PFS, meaning that when he accepted a return to the national team setup just a few months ago, he was quite rusty in terms of getting to know the new batch of players that have been recruited to represent the Pridnestrovian Republic at Rushmore's most prestigious football competition.

There is no denying that Werner Ceausescu is one of the best football managers that Pridnestrovia has ever produced. And he will forever be remembered for his triumph with the Global Cup of Soccer, along with the glories of the 58th Baptism of Fire and the 27th Copa Rushmori. But this is not the same group of players that he led to those glories all those years ago. This is a completely new generation of Pridnestrovian players tasked with bringing glory and honor to the Pridnestrovian Republic; only Ferdinand Abbing remains of the generation that Ceausescu has worked with. And Pridnestrovia has not had a good record against Eura in matches where Ceausescu has been the Red Army's manager. It will take a huge dose of luck for Pridnestrovia to possibly get a positive result against Eura tomorrow, but both Ceausescu and the team believe that it is possible. And if they believe, then why not the Pridnestrovian people as well?

PRIDNESTROVIA 1 - 1 OBEROUR AR MORO
DAVIDOV (31')       PIQUE-PAIN (67')

MATCH STATISTICS
Possession
Pridnestrovia: 52%
Oberour Ar Moro: 48%
Shots
Pridnestrovia: 20 (8 on target)
Oberour Ar Moro: 21 (11 on target)
Corners
Pridnestrovia: 13
Oberour Ar Moro: 13
Fouls
Pridnestrovia: 25
Oberour Ar Moro: 14

[Logria]

Success - but bigger tests lie ahead

To say Logria's expectations coming into the Copa Rushmori were low would be somewhat of an understatement. It's never been fertile ground for the Swans, and even this competition is being overshadowed at home by anticipation for the Rugby League World Cup, but our nation's footballers are at least making a decent play of being remembered on home shores.

Peter Emery has been the biggest name so far, scoring in both of Logria's games. His well-taken strike against Falkyr secured three points, and the team were unlucky not to hold on for all three points against the KRT. In the end, it would be harsh to blame Henry Megson for the deflection that put the Kalactin equaliser past a helpless George Picton.

Four points from two matches means that Logria have a decent chance of making the last sixteen. Just two things stand in their way. Unfortunately for the Swans, those two things are the national teams of Cassadaigua and Nephara. Points against either side would be a miracle...but given the heart and determination of the Swans thus far, it's a miracle that it wouldn't be absurd to believe in. Here's hoping.

[Taeshan]

"A loss against Pasarga and a win against Plane of Possibility. Two expected results, but the first game was a real sign of what people have come to think of your tenure as National Team Manager. You don't seem to be able to get over the hump and beat the bigger teams, and win the bigger games. What do you have to do to make a deep run in this tournament?"

"First of all we have beaten bigger teams, we Beat Equestria in my first World Cup. We held The Holy Empire in the Round of Sixteen until extra time. Hell we destroyed the current World Champions in qualifying the campaign before. Second off that's a rude question. Real rude. I've had my lumps right, but wow, we are talking about a really good side in Pasarga. It is not like they dominated us, I really expect better from you. Next Question."

"There are those that wonder if the players really hear you anymore. Two full campaigns, a third now likley. What do you say to those doubters?"

"Is this like a thing? Did you conspire to be dicks to me before this press conference?"

"No it is just we feel there are valid..."

"No, that's just rude. Not only do you badger me with these questions, but you are rude. Have some decency. I do the job they ask me to do. I compete, sometimes we lose, we don't lose much, but it happens. It happens to everyone, even Iarlaith lost games in the 60's but you didn't have him answering these questions. Next Question."

"What do you think of Shiloh's move to Sabrefell Moths? Do you think he can use it to overcome the complacency many seem to see in the squad you keep calling up?"

"What the hell is wrong with you? Shiloh is a good kid, great player. His speed and vision, he is a great leader on this team. He's showing the younger kids what they need to do to be respected in this world. Not a lot of players make a huge 15 million dollar move to Nephara. And you know who coached him there, a lot of me. A lot of me being the guy that helped him be a star in two World Cups. A short lister on the Galacticos."

"But what about the coaching for Real Azuris? At least there he has won things."

"Wow. I'm done. "

[Ancharmunn]

The Maudraiska Mirror

BucaneroAncharmunn chances of Copa progression dim following further late fade

Despite the performance of Juanito Bucanero once against lighting up the Copa Rushmori stage, he and his Ancharmunn team-mates look extremely unlikely to progress any further in the Copa Rushmori following their opponents from Mavinet belatedly finding their shooting boots.

Bucanero was once again the one shining light for an Ancharmunn side that largely looked devoid of any threat and unaware of any desire to contain any opposing threat from what was a largely wayward Mavinet strike force. The Ancharmunn defence in particular floundered against the tricky play of Ho Vu Thanh Hoang, who found himself running amok against both Charmunnry full-backs, but more often than not the Water Buffaloes were left to find the finishing of Ho and striker Vo Thanh Hai wasteful.

For Ancharmunn as in their previous two games, only Bucanero appeared capable of creating anything and as time went by he would largely give up on trying to involve his teammates into play. However against a raw and typically leaky Mavinet defence Bucanero will have fancied his chances of making inroads, and indeed often looked on the verge of doing so. However it must be admitted that the changes made for this tournament by Mavinet coach Nguyen Minh Quan have largely solidified that weakness, and Bucanero constantly found himself stopped by some excellent recovery defending, brave blocks and last ditch tackles.

However Nguyen may have feared the worst when just before the hour mark a mix up between centre-back Ho Hung Dong and goalkeeper Nguyen Hoang Trung in clearing an aimless long ball from Ancharmunn goalie Floyd Leyland allowed Bucanero to cheekily nab the ball from between the pair and open the scoring. Astonishingly, despite having largely been under the cosh for much of the match, as in the opening round against Eura, Ancharmunn, or perhaps more accurately Bucanero, once agains found themselves with a lead to hang on to.

As against Eura, Ancharmunn found their goal once again under constant pressure after scoring. Unlike the restart in the Eura game however, it took some time for the Charmunnry barricade to finally break. Once the goal finally came with Ho Vu Thanh Hoang cutting in easily from the left wing and squaring to Vo Thanh Hai for an easy finish just after eighty minutes, Mavinet were easily able to follow it up with a further two goals in quick succession from Tran Hoang Minh and captain Nguyen Quang Khai to secure their first ever Copa Rushmori win.

With just one point from three games now, and having lost to the lowest ranked side in the group bar themselves, Ancharmunn’s chances of progression now look slim at best. A win against Oberour Ar Moro and then hoping that results over the next two matchdays elsewhere allow for four points to somehow be amongst the best third place finishes are Ancharmunn’s only hope now of progression.


It’ll surely take a masterplan of world class managerial genius to pull it off from Leo Conlan, but the Ancharmunn manager’s gameplan against Oberour Ar Moro appears pretty simple.

“Just give the bloody ball to Bucanero!” he was heard shouting in the dressing room post match.

[Plane of Possibility]

Field of Dreams
Plane of Possibility
After MD3

Plane of Possibility 0-2 Taeshan

That game had been... Rough. Taeshan had one of the best defenses in the region, and the Tiefling wave came over and over and over again, just to fail. Eh.

What was more interesting? An analysis of the first three seasons of the Planar League, now that there was talk of another Division being added, adding five more races and five more classes to the Planar League. Eldritch Knights, Artificers, Lizardfolk... It was going to be quite interesting.

Paladins, with a 2.33 average placing, is the best placing team; Rangers 3, Fighters 3.67, Warlocks 4.67, Rogues 5.33, Barbarians 5.67, Monks 7.33, Goliaths 8.33, and Tieflings 8.67.

Elves 11, Dragonfolk, Druids, and Wizards all at 11.67, Clerics 12, Genasi 13.67, Gnomes 16, Dwarves 17.33, Half-Orcs 17.67, Humans 19, and Halflings 19.33.

Will the rise of Tieflings be contested? Or will gold buy all the merits?

[Valladares]

The big day for the Valladar social democracy represented in the Labor Party of Valladares, which had emerged as big victors of the 23rd General Election, had finally come. On Inauguration Day, the 257 members of the new Royal Parliament (107 Senators and 152 National Assembly members, the lower chamber) were scheduled to take their seats in a joint session of both legislative chambers along with the new Prime Minister of Valladares, who would be officially appointed and sworn in by Kings Marcus and Cyrus, who would preside over the session, the first one held after the catastrophic joint session that led to the passing of the Law of Secession and eventually, to this election. It was expected that the Kings would confirm Florent Philippe, the leader of the winning party, as the new Prime Minister there and it had been reported that he had managed to make a good impression on the sovereigns when they hosted him at the Green Palace the day after the election, therefore his appointment was an open secret that was further clarified after the elected Liberal MPs including their leader Édouard Berthier gave him their unanimous support.

With the inauguration being scheduled to be held from 9 a.m., the elect MPs started arriving to the Royal Parliament building a couple of hours in advance of the event, with Aboriginal senator Inghusia Parravaz being the first one to arrive, a quarter to eight o'clock, joined by her three fellow Aboriginal senators a few minutes later. Little by little, the bulk of the elected MPs as well as the special guests were arriving to the place, with the contingent of Labour politicians and supporters led by Florent Philippe arriving at the doors of Parliament House flying Valladar flags with 30 minutes to go after a 30-minute march from Independence Park. Meanwhile, the historic Dome Room where all the joint sessions of the Royal Parliament were held was already abuzz with activity: the deputies were taking their seats according to their chamber with Senators to the right and members of the National Assembly to the left, some of them were talking warmly among themselves and some others were already moving their tokens in search of deals and coalitions.

The joint session started a few minutes past 9 a.m. when both Valladar sovereigns entered through the central door and hall of the Dome Room, wearing their crowns as well as the royal regalia all those present standing up for the National Anthem of Valladares as well as the Royal Anthem. King Marcus proceeded to call each of the 257 elected deputies by name to verify the session quorum, to which everyone replied. Immediately after, he and his brother Cyrus started their speech which lasted for the next 40 minutes in which they called the newly elected MPs to stay united and work together for the nation. They also recalled the events of the session in which the Law of Secession was passed, specifically the ruse performed by former and now-disgraced Conservative Speaker Stéphane Bertrand to overcome any obstacles to the passing of said law by deliberately not counting the absent Liberal and Labour deputies for the effects of quorum verification. The Kings called the new Parliament to make the utmost effort to prevent such acts in the future, and defend the basics of democracy and the will of the Valladar people.

Following the Kings' speech, the Heads of State took the oath of the 257 elect MPs with which they were officially sworn in as the new Royal Parliament of Valladares, and then the big moment of the day came: the confirmation of Florent Philippe as new Prime Minister of Valladares. Philippe was then called to the lectern by King Marcus, who took his oath as new Head of Government, which was rounded up by thunderous applause. Next, the new Prime Minister addressed those present at the Dome Room for his first speech as leader of the Royal Government. The former mayor of Fontvielle cleared his throat and started his speech thanking the Valladar people for giving the Labour party the chance to propose and lead a real change in the nation. He then called all members of Parliament as well as citizens, irrespective of political affiliation, to join forces with him and support the efforts of his government ahead of the big challenges awaiting. In his speech, Philippe specifically underlined two of them: the eastern Mountbatten/Angostura issue and the restoration of relations with Eura, strained following the Mega Bomba test performed by the previous Conservative Royal Government:

"On the domestic front, the situation in Columbus and the Mountbatten state is the first challenge we will find in our government. Whilst the Labour Party initially opposed a partition that was clearly illegal from its origin to its consummation, we are willing to respect whichever decision is made by the Constitutional Court regarding the legality of the Law of Secession. We want both Hispanics and Anglophones in the territory of the current Mountbatten state to live at peace with each other, be it in a single state or in two of them, and I promise you that my Government will take the appropriate steps to meet that goal depending on the outcome at the Court. We are committed to enforcing the will of the people of Mountbatten, and of the Valladar people, but such will must be fully complied with in the field of legality."

In the field of foreign affairs, the new Prime Minister also extended an invitation to the Euran goverment for a restoration of bilateral relations, while also having words for a potential approachment with Darmen on issues pertaining the Westlands zone, the latter of which depending on the Darmeni side's actual willingness to negotiate.

"I am aware that the effects of the Mega Bomba on Valladares' international reputation were more harmful than initially calculated by the previous administration. It did big damage to the innocent people of Terra Henrius, whose mistreatment and denial of human rights systematically performed by the government of the Royal Kingdom of Quebec I would like to denounce, caused some unnecessary tension with the Euran government which felt offended by the test with reason, and might have also made some enemies for us in this dangerous multiverse. Such a heinous act should not be repeated under any cimcunstances, and because of this, I would like to extend an invitation to the Government of Eura to discuss this issue and some others currently affecting our bilateral relations, clear things up, and to try and work on a solution with them. The stance of the Labour movement on this issue is that the stability of Terranea should be the stability of Valladares and vice versa, and we want to restore our work relationship with Eura based on those lines."

"There's another issue in foreign matters that has stayed unresolved for a long time and we would like it to finally reach a settlement, which is the bilateral relationship with Darmen. Although it's a fact that the levels of tension between both nations have lowered in recent times, I find it is still necessary to reassert Valladar sovereignty over the Westlands state once and for all and prevent any future Darmeni claims to the territory, either through a treaty or a declaration. In addition to that, it has come to my attention that there are cases of ethnic Valladar irredentism to the other side of the border, and this government would like to work with its Darmeni counterpart to address that issue and get to a satisfactory agreement for all of the involved parties, obviously striving for the best interests of the Valladar people in Darmen. After the restoration of the relationship with Eura, this will be our next goal."

All in all, the speech by Prime Minister Philippe lasted for nearly 40 minutes, and afterwards he proceeded to announce the names of the members of the new Royal Cabinet, largely dominated by Labourists and Liberals, with the Conservatives, the Catholic League and the Greens being awarded one ministry each, and took the oath of the new ministers. Having done that, he returned to his seat to watch the election of the new members of the Boards of Directors of both the Senate and National Assembly, who were sworn in by the Kings, with which the inauguration of the Royal Parliament ended, at around noon. After a few months of uncertainty and temporary government by the Kings, Valladares had a new government. The real challenge for Philippe, his government, and the Valladar social democracy had just begun.

Valladares 3-1 Darmen
(Benezet 23', Mickel 47', Valdivia 85'; Blackwood 55')

Valladares: Gaviria - Marrugo, Delgado, Rueda - Rojas, O'Brien, Mickel, Padilla - Baume, Alexandre, Benezet
Subbed Out: Mickel 63', Alexandre 73', Baume 80'
Subbed In: Malicki 63', Matheus 73', Valdivia 80'
Unused Subs: Dussan, Brown, Démont, Castillo, Lachlant, Durmisi, Pearson, Germain, Chamoun
Manager: Jessica Curran (Cassadaigua)

[Astograth]

COPA RUSHMORI XXXV
Matchday 4

Group A
Crystalline Caverns 0–0 Nethertopia
Savojarna 4–0 Olastor

Group A                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Savojarna              3   3  0  0    9   3  +6    9
2 Yuezhou                3   1  1  1    6   6   0    4
3 Olastor                4   1  1  2    3   7  −4    4
4 Crystalline Caverns    3   0  2  1    0   1  −1    2
  Nethertopia            3   0  2  1    0   1  −1    2

Group B
Taeshan 0–1 Pedestrian States
Pasarga 3–0 Plane of Possibility

Group B                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Pasarga                3   3  0  0    8   1  +7    9
2 Plane of Possibility   4   2  0  2   10   9  +1    6
3 Pedestrian States      3   1  1  1    4   6  −2    4
4 Taeshan                3   1  0  2    2   3  −1    3
5 Ostralo                3   0  1  2    4   9  −5    1

Group C
Oberour Ar Moro 2–2 Mavinet
Eura 3–2 Pridnestrovia

Group C                Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Eura                   3   3  0  0   13   4  +9    9
2 Pridnestrovia          4   1  2  1    4   4   0    5
3 Mavinet                3   1  1  1    5   4  +1    4
4 Oberour Ar Moro        3   0  2  1    4   8  −4    2
5 Ancharmunn             3   0  1  2    2   8  −6    1

This matchday’s simple writing prompt: Social media use. How is it used by your national team and federation? By the fans? Do the players have a significant digital presence? Are there arguments on it? Is there a silly #challenge surrounding the team? Or is it something completely unknown in your nation?

[Kalosia]

A selection of today's headlines from one of Kalosia's leading newspapers, La Gažetë di Monterë:
Note: Again, select terms have been translated into Kalosian arbitrarily.

KOPA RUŠMORI
Tonight: Darmen vs Kalosia (Group F)
AREKSË, ASTROGRAT — The Darmeni team, currently 2nd in group standings, will play against the Kalosian team at 9pm Monterra time. [READ MORE]



Tonight: 83rd WorldVision Song Contest
SAN KRISTOFORU, ËĽALTË — The 83° Festival dëla Kanžu MonduVižio will be held tonight, broadcast live from Saint Christopher, Llalta. Tonight's show will see entries from 46 countries, including Kalosia's very own Sierra Elena singing "#OBSESSED". The split jury and televoting segments introduced and trialled at the most recent contest in Tiferet, Ertzei Kishim has now become a permanent fixture. Rushmori nations competing alongside Kalosia at the spectacle include Electrum Diplomatic Offices, Saviera, and Ertzei Kishim. From nearby Esportiva, participating nations include Polkopia, Nekoni, and Ethane. [READ MORE]



OPINION COLUMN
Want to encourage economic growth? Give us the full Copa Rushmori experience
by TBA
To be revealed next matchday — stay tuned!

[Yue Zhou]

A Hotel in Thorsborg, Savojarna
Two nights before Yuezhou v. Crystalline Caverns

The Yincheng Capitals players on Yuezhou's team tended to stick together. It made sense, in a way - there were enough of them to form a legit group, they all knew each other and played together on a daily basis, and people from Yincheng were known for favoring their own more. So on nights when there wasn't training early the next morning or a match the next day, Han Jian, Zhu Aiguo, Yang Tao, and Wang Jiahui would all sit around, drink beer, and play video games.

"Did you hear? Dramane Cargarin just made it official. We're getting one of The Askari Union's best keepers next season," the young center-back Zhu said, excitedly.

"About time," offered Han Jian in response. "I like Jiang Wuming as much as the next guy, but he wasn't the same after he got injured."

"With Cargarin and Lethe Cirvante next season, we should have a good shot to win the league. Maybe the cup too, if we get lucky. Our biggest holes were at goalkeeper and attacking midfielder, and now that we have both of those filled, we should be good to go," offered Yang Tao. "I mean, you two anchoring the defense, me and Cirvante in the midfield, and Wang Jiahui up top? Plus we're apparently signing Lin Wangming too? Next season's going to be fun."

"Fun?" scoffed Wang. "It's going to be a fucking slaughter. Beian barely fluked their way past us this year, and with all these reinforcements, we're going to walk all over the YPL."

Sensing Wang was somehow riled up now, the diplomatic Han attempted to shift the conversation. "You guys hear that rumor we're getting a special cut of the YPL profits from Ren Qiang? Pretty wild, right? Although with all these signings, it kinda-"

Unfortunately, he'd only succeeded at riling Wang up further. "Yeah, I heard Wen Xiaohui try to poison our team with that. You can't possibly be believing that. We're a big club, we can make big signings, and it's not our fault everyone wants to play with us. (racial slurs) have no res-"

"Well, I just meant that a lot of big contracts are being handed out, and we're in the YPL, which hasn't signed a foreigner in, like, twenty years, is all," Han said, quickly moving the subject along. Yang Tao nodded at him, recognizing his attempts to steer clear of Wang's political opinions, while Zhu Aiguo's attention had already been diverted to his phone.

---

A few doors down, Yuan Zilai and Chen Huikang were watching the final minutes of Crystalline Caverns - Nethertopia on the television. As they watched, the referee blew the final whistle on ninety-plus minutes of entirely scoreless football. "Couldn't have gone better for us today, huh?" Chen offered to his boss. "CC and Nethertopia draw, and Savojarna take care of Olastor. I think we're into the Round of 16 if we don't lose to Crystalline Caverns."

"Well, we'll see how Nethertopia do against Savojarna. But if Savojarna don't take their foot off the gas, a draw should see us through." Yuan thought briefly, then turned to Chen. "Hey, you were a Red Dragon striker back in the day. You think this team is different from those Round of 16 teams?"

"Well, we always barely made it to the last 16 - if we made it at all - for all the Copa Rushmoris. Nephara pumped us in our first knockout game, then Valladares in our next...Savojarna were level with us for 120 minutes, but ultimately they broke through in penalties, and it's been all uphill for them ever since."

"So how do you think we'll do if we make it?"

"Well, in terms of talent, we're not so different from Qiu Hanying and Alex Cartwright's squads. And in terms of heart...well, I suppose we have a little more, but all it's done is gotten two of our players sent off and a consolation prize against Savojarna. But what we didn't have those times," he said, turning back to Yuan Zilai, "were the tactics. Qiu tried to play nine at the back, and we were never talented enough to do that. Cartwright had us free-flowing, attacking, and fun to watch - but also open at the back, and overly reliant on Wen Xiaoli and Jiawei Sangu."

"No, this time, we have you. We'll still be outclassed. We'll probably still lose. But I think we have a fighting chance."

[Nephara]

Cassadaigua 4 - 1 Nephara
(4-4-2) 1 - Mercator; 2 - Stride, 5 - Thorn (c), 6 - Brosch, 3 - Muscadin; 13 - Saroszi, 4 - Shone (8 - Cromwell 71'), 21 - Moxham, 11 - Deventer (7 - Kuepper 77'); 9 - Bastable, 14 - Tzorvas (10 - Metzger 53')
Goal: Metzger 63'

Extract from the Book of Thorn.

Honestly, what the fuck was that.

Every team is going to occasionally put in a bad show. Even last cycle, in qualifying, mostly sweeping opponents into the bin, we still all woke up the wrong side of bed one morning and got tonked 3-2 by a nation whose FA, I just looked up out of curiosity, has already dissolved. Thanks, South Charlia. We generously loaned you an infusion of KPB and that's what you do with it.
Anyway, we weren't that cataclysmically awful today. But it still wasn't right. And the Dagans are a team that knew how to punish us for it.

Still... going into the tunnel 3-0 down, that's rough. Strauss was waiting. You could see the gaffer was seething inside.
All interval, she didn't say anything. Her assistant, Ivy Herrick, took over for that.
Herrick's a weird, tough old boot of a lady, our U21s manager promoted to the top table. She's like forty, but she claims to be much older than that, aged in a bubble in Bonesea or something. Now, I read the memoirs of those lesbians* like everyone else, but come on. She looks 40, claims she's like 65. Well, she throws a chair like she's 25, it turns out. And have you ever heard the sound of wood snapping over a knee? Sounds a lot like a spine, if you've got an active imagination. I do.
She had many choice words for us. Can't say I knew what all of 'em meant, exactly, but we went out there sure as shit determined not to let 3-0 blossom into 6-0. Still, I braved a look at the sideline after we conceded the fourth. Face like a thunderstorm.

Election season's rising up again.
Most of the lads are Pro Dems, I mean, we're working-class guys, basically all of us. Even the ones who don't care will probably swing it to them or the Alliance.
Normally I'd agree, but there's something about the way the new National carries herself, the way she talks. It's strange being a Nephar sometimes. We're a nation of brawlers, and proud of it. The Margravine plays up to it, loud and brash talk about how we'll fuck shit up and fix shit right.
Ulrica Lindt's different. More statesmanlike, kind of like Fern a couple Margraves back. Talks with passion and grace and strength. She's got plans to unfuck Corvistone, which is, trust me, fucked. Refugees are great and all, but we kind of just poured them into the one place and just kind of hoping that north Eurans and Sameban communists would kumbaya it out. And now there's the Falks and the Qusmi'y** on top of that.
Lindt wants to let Corvistone simmer a while, spread out the Indigo visas to other cities like Creed, Lindmark, Coret, Covenant, Newrook. Another couple I forget. Really build up an industrial powerhouse that can stand up to the world by pouring money and manpower in the right places.
Honestly, the way she talks kind of reminds me of... that Euran Prime Minister, the slightly psycho one whose name I forget. Might not share a drink or want her to know your first name, but in a leaderly way. For once I might be happy enough no matter who takes it.

* Due to an unlikely sequence of circumstances, the Shrewsthrow-Scarlett couple were thrust out into Bonesea [OOC: who wrote the entire storyline, so full credit goes to him] on honeymoon. Their memoirs are regarded warmly by Nepharim, who give the pleasant but limited Ursa Scarlett's imagination rather too much credit by regarding the work as semi-fictional.

** The final vowels have been crossed out and corrected three times.

[Savojarna]

Cutoff for the fourth matchday on the Savojar half!

Group D
Eastfield Lodge 2–1 Southwest Eastnorth
Astograth 0–0 The Askari Union

  Group D                          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Graintfjall                        3   2  1  0    3   1  +2    7
2 Southwest Eastnorth                3   1  1  1    7   6  +1    4
3 Astograth                          3   1  1  1    1   1   0    4
4 The Askari Union                   4   1  1  2    5   6  −1    4
5 Eastfield Lodge                    3   1  0  2    2   4  −2    3

Group E
Cassadaigua 1–0 Logria
Nephara 2–1 Falkyr

  Group E                          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Cassadaigua                        3   3  0  0   10   2  +8    9
2 Nephara                            3   2  0  1   10   6  +4    6
3 Logria                             3   1  1  1    2   2   0    4
4 Kalactanian Rushmore Territories   3   0  2  1    2   8  −6    2
5 Falkyr                             4   0  1  3    2   8  −6    1

Group F
Darmen 0–1 Kalosia
Sargossa 4–1 Valladares

  Group F                          Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Valladares                         4   3  0  1   10   6  +4    9
2 Sargossa                           3   2  0  1    8   2  +6    6
3 Rea San Vegas                      3   1  0  2    1   6  −5    3
4 Kalosia                            3   1  0  2    2   5  −3    3
5 Darmen                             3   1  0  2    2   4  −2    3

As for the RP prompt, which I have so shamefully forgotten in the past - by now, every team had a day off in their host nation, or have theirs come up. How did your team spend it? Did you explore Savojarna or Astograth? Go shopping in the town of your hotel? Spend it with a brutal training regime on the field? Went to the stadium to scout out your opposition?

[Southwest Eastnorth]

A Challenge Dropped!
Article takes excerpts from - swensport.swe/national_football_team.html

ASTOGRATH - A very sluggish Eastfield Lodge team looked very ripe for the taking for the Frontiersmen, they looked rough having placed donuts on the scoreboard in each game. But alas a rejuvenated Eastfieldian team took it to the SWEN's in a 2-1 victory over the Frontiersmen in a capacity filled Cherketzo Arena, where a mix of the green and blue of EFL was perfectly blended with the bright yellow of the SWENNIC fans. Chris Houton, the hero of both the Grainfjall and Askari games was negated easily by an experienced EFL roster that had been around the block a bit. Like with the Askari team, a rotation of strikers did get the ball past the goalkeeping work of Miles Mikohoffer. Zaaid Stepangot the start for the EFL team and in the thirtieth minute got the scoring started with a brilliant pass from the super talented middie' Jennifer Farrow. Passing was a huge point of the Eastfield Lodge team, and Farrow and Raquel Accardi did an amazing job of keep away. Houton did get a couple of shot son goal but the consistent work of Jam'Aan Couch a reserve keeper put in the goal for this game had done masterfully to change the tide against the Frontiersmen/Pioneers. The EFL team had done fairly decently in their prior two games with both previous opponents only scoring two goals, but it seems they have rectified their issues.

Another goal by the Eastfield lodge teams primary striker, Nya Murray, put them up 2-0, a decent but not insurmountable lead. Murray came of the bench in an odd strategy choice but would work wonders, dashing around the defenders for many open looks, but in the 78th minute she got her goal and helped extend the lead. Mikohoffer hasn't done horrible, but the 6 goals allowed is worse in the group as this ties the Frontiersmen with ironically Askari Union who gave up five goals to SWEN in game one as the worst defensive team in the group. The game towards the end wasn't all bad news though, a late Van Austin goal, that came off a beautiful Chris Houton pass, during Injury time did give the Lodgers a scare but they did play a game of keep away to finish the game 2-1. Up next for the Frontiersmen/Pioneers are the hosts Astograth. Astograth has a long history of footballing and them being the hosts would make them formidable, but a period of self isolation and time away from the game has seen them play catchup in the new world of football, so they may be more even with us than we think.

EASTFIELD LODGE - 2
Stepangot 30'
Murray 78'

SOUTHWEST EASTNORTH - 1
Austin 90+2'

[Darmen]

All Greens on Precipice of Disaster
Losing to La Nacional one thing, losing to Li Krešenti another

AREXA, ASTOGRATH - After losing to Valladares' La Nacional, 3-1, in Gesterlake, Darmen's All Greens withdrew to Arexa to regroup against Kalosia's Li Krešenti. After defeating Sargossa in their first match of the Copa, the All Greens felt confident that the second half of the group stage would be smooth sailing regardless of the result in the Darmen vs. Valladares match.

It wasn't to be however, as Darmen fell to the Kalosians by a single goal. Klaudiu Kasanu was the culprit, his 78th minute goal breaking a goalless deadlock for the wrong team and putting Darmen in a precarious position moving forward in the tournament.

With only a single match remaining before the knockouts, Darmen must secure victory against an unranked Rea San Vegas and hope that the Sargossans can handle their business against Kalosia to help Darmen into third place in Group F. Even that might not be enough as their are a significant number of potential third place finishers who will have 7 or 8 points, while Darmen can only achieve 6.

All Greens' Manager Berhtoald Myers had this to say, "We always come into the Copa with some fairly high goals and a decent amount of expectation that we'll deliver on them. And yet, every Copa, for the past several, we've squandered away the chances we've had and failed to deliver. 31, 32, 33, we failed to even make it out of the group stage. Last Copa, we did finally make it out, but then lost on penalties to Saintland when we never should have needed extra time to begin with."

"And now, once again, we're in a spot where we might not make it into the knockouts," continued Myers. "I can't tell you how disapointing it is. On the one hand, these short tournaments are like that, every loss is magnified in its importance. We thought we were done with losing after the Valladares match. I guess not."

Rea San Vegas' lone victory in this competition was against Kalosia, which does not bode well for Darmen.

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Maxwell Romanov Passes Away
Leaves Darmeni Royalists Without Leader

SCOTT CITY - Maxwell Romanov, the only remaining member of the former Darmeni royal family to still lay claim to the now defunct throne, passed away yesterday at the age of just 34 years old. Romanov had been privately battling pancreatic cancer for the past year and a half according to a family spokesman. He was last seen publicly following a Royalist Party campaign event in May of 2045. The only son of Darmen's final royal ruler, Duchess Janessa Romanov, the young royalist was survived by his mother and several other members of the extended royal family.

Following Darmen's reunification and establishment as a Republic, Duchess Janessa was required to repudiate monarchism to give legitimacy to the new administration. She did so and was followed in doing so by almost all members of the royal family who might have been able to make a legitimate claim to the throne, the lone exception being her son. Instead, for the past eleven years, Maxwell Romanov had led the Royalist Party through three general elections and been the leading voice for the abolishment of the Republic and reestablishment of the monarchy.

The House of Magistrates is expected to meet in the coming days to discuss the path forward for monarchism in Darmen. Although no longer holding any official role in Darmen's governance, the 84 member House of Magistrates remains an important part of the Royalist Party. The House of Magistrates was part of Darmen's formerly tricameral parliament and was in charge of royal affairs, particularly in overseeing succession. While Darmen's monarchy operated on a hereditary basis, the House of Magistrates was still required to approve each successor and could, although it did so on only one occasion, reject the hereditary successor and appoint another instead.

In this particular instance, with all of the remaining hereditary claimants to the dormant throne having adopted republicanism, the House of Magistrates will need to appoint a successor to be Darmen's new pretender. However, early indications may suggest that that won't happen. At least one anonymous member of the House of Magistrates has indicated to the press that without a legitimate leader, the Darmeni royalist movement may simply choose to "give up and move on." Doing so would mark the end of a monarchy which has been in existence for over 900 years.

A private funeral for Romanov is expected to be held in the coming days. Although many were reached out to for comment, no member of Darmen's republican government has responded and none are expected to attend the funeral.

Unless there are significant developments to the contrary in the next few days, monarchism in Darmen appears to be dying, ensuring that Darmeni republicanism is here to stay.

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Darmeni Social Media Usage Lags Behind Rest of Rushmore
Usage Highest Among Urbanites Aged 15-45

SCOTT CITY - According to a recent report by the Citizens for Internet Freedom lobbyist group, only 24.67% of Darmenis make use of social media, despite the numerous options available to them online. The number of Darmenis using social media lags far behind that of other Rushmori nations, where participation rates can reach as high as 70%.

Social media usage was found to be highest among those living in Darmen's urban municipalities, where participation rates were over twice as high as those found in rural areas. Additionally, the report noted that most social media users are younger, with most users starting their social media "careers" while in the later stages of their schooling or while attending college. Participation rates dropped sharply once Darmenis reached the age of 45. MyFace was the most used social media platform, counting 1.8 million users.

The primary reasons cited for not using social media were: preferring to interact with friends and family face-to-face; a perception that social media leads to toxic cultural, political and social environments; and finally privacy and security concerns.

The lobbyist group called on the government to work with the various social media companies to address the issues of toxicity and privacy/security to help increase social media usage. The report stated: "Social media, when used in the proper manner, can provide excellent benefits via the free exchange of ideas and information. Moving into the future, social media will represent an important tool in any functioning liberal democracy and it is important that the systems and institutions that support it are strong and robust."

[Taeshan]

"You expressed a bit of...dislike in the media's questions after the last game against Plane of Possibility, now you've lost 1-0 against, sorry let me check my notes, oh right...The Pedestrian States, do you feel some level of Hubris coming off this loss?"

"That is a bully question and I would say you are better than that, but at this point I think we all know you are in fact, not, so I'll move past it."

"Do you take responsibility for this loss?"

"No. It happens. Sometimes the better team losses. We controlled the game, but we let in a goal and we lost. It happens."

"Any changes to expect before the Ostralo game?"

"Hopefully different media members."

"Are you going to win and advance?"

"Will that shut you guys up?"

"Any chance we see a more attacking take in the last game, especially after a similar last game against the Holy Empire at the World Cup? You once again find yourself in need of a big win to have any chance."

"This is Taeshan, I doubt we could score more goals than 2 in a game every week. We play defense, it theoretically wins championships."

"I mean you guys haven't really won anything lately."

"I'm done with this."

[Pasarga]

"And with that, the Wanderers not only have secured their place into the knockout stages of the Copa Rushmori, but have indeed also secured the group title. While it has been quite a valiant effort put forth from the Planar squad to keep pace with the Wanderers, in the end our little bit of extra skill was the difference between the two sides. The three to nil scoreline is a bit flattering, if truth be told, the Planar squad was in the game for the better part of an hour, but eventually I think they just ran out of steam and our players put them to the sword. The finishing prowess of Júlia Müller and Alexander Jager continues to astonish, even after three years now of them being the preferred starting pair up front for the Wanderers. The way that they seem to compliment one another and find each other with great passes is just a beauty to watch and will be missed once age does start to catch up with Jager and force him from the starting spot to the bench and eventually out of the team. At least we get this tournament still to bare witness to the majesty that those two seem to have when out on the pitch together."

"Yes, eight goals from three matches is a very good pace to be setting, netting just about thrice a match and against competition that is known to be tough to break down. Then again, the group preview did say that Taeshan had been in a bit of a dip of form recently, perhaps we are reading too much into the Wanderers' victory over the Purple Knights, especially given that they have also now lost against the Pedestrian States side. It a bit of a twist of irony, the Purple Knights will be the Wanderers' biggest fans when the two sides meet in the final matchday, as they will need the Wanderers to take the full points against the Pedestrian States side in order to have a chance at progressing into the knockout stages. I suppose to the Planar squad will be hoping for the same outcome, as they are in a precarious position with their six points and second place in the table but having their bye come on the final matchday of the group, leaving open the door for both Taeshan and Pedestrian States to match or surpass their point tally, respectively. A very unenviable position, if I may do say so myself."

"I think the biggest story though is not that the Wanderers have been finding the net as often as they have, it is that the backline and keepers are playing particularly well, with just a single goal conceded so far from the group stage. They could put a real stamp on their authority of the group if they manage to put up another clean sheet against the Pedestrian States, which should be perhaps easier than the last match when they blanked the Planar squad that had been scoring goals for fun in the three matches prior. That Euran built back four, with somehow all four starting defenders plying their trade in the Gold League, has been nothing short of miraculous in their defensive effort. Combine that with the way that the Euran teams seem to be able to bring out the best of the youth that our academies produce, it really is no wonder why that Eura seems to have made Pasarga something of a pipeline of talent for their clubs and why the Wanderers' squads are always so full of players who make their way over to Eura at some point in their domestic careers."

"With the group secure, it may be a match that the Wanderers will experiment with a few players, as well as letting their stars catch a breath before the gauntlet that is the knockout rounds. What with the side having fell in the first knockout round last edition to Nephara, it definitely could be seen as a boon to try and rest those tired legs ahead of such a pivotal match and hopefully series of matches. Word is that the side is trying to at least get into the semifinals of the competition, might as well take advantage of this situation since the side has been able to get the results that have earned them such an advantageous position. Maybe let Alvardo start as the keeper, Zita Szöcs and Márió Szölösi a chance in the midfield, and Nataša Horvat up top to let Jager get a rest instead of still trying to lead the team on his shoulders. The opportunity is there and has been duly earned, let us not waste such a glorious chance."