World Cup 85 || RP Thread

by **Audioslavia** » Thu Jun 18, 2020 7:18 pm

Click the image to watch the video

Script

From cycles 40 to 49, four footballing dynasties dominated. The start of the ‘decade’ saw Valanora and Starblaydia divide five tournaments between them, with Starblaydia kickstarting the post-Jolt era by defeating Valanora in the World Cup 47 final.

The other three of the other four World Cup finals in the 40s were fought between two sides. The Holy Empire and Candelaria and Marquez.

Candelaria and Marquez were the sublime masquerading as the ordinary. The Big Blues bounced onto the world stage for cycle 45, their tenth entry into World Cup football, with the following footnote:

“RP Permissions: Do pick scorers, etcetera, and godmod away – with the proviso that almost anything that would be considered impossible in the “real world” (see gnomes, elves, dwarves, androids etcetera) would likewise be dismissed as such by most Candelariasians and, in many cases, removed from TV coverage.”
:- Candelaria and Marquez, WC45 Roster Thread

“Anything that would be considered impossible in the real world would be dismissed by most Candelariasians”. Somewhat ironic, then, that they’d become associated with a Holy Empire team that is known for going to World Cups with teams of Mexican Jumping Beans, harmless little old ladies and characters from Doctor Who. In World Cup 45, The Holy Empire were still in their prehistoric period. Literally. They fielded a team of cavemen, played in a fetching leather singlet and forced visiting teams to use a large spherical rock as a ball.

The first of three finals between the two teams went the way of Candelaria and Marquez. After the first 90 minutes had finished level, C and M stormed to victory via three almost identical goals in the early stages of extra time to win out 4-1. Three crosses, three goals, the first of which bundled over the line by Abdul Ibadulla from Adekunde’s downward header.

By this time, Candelaria and Marquez had already garnered something of a reputation for posting long, yet engrossingly written match reports. Their output after the World Cup 45 final was no different. The cavemen of the Holy Empire were somewhat less erudite.

By cycle 48, the oppressively ‘normal’ Candelaria and Marquez were beginning to accept the nature of the multiverse in which they found themselves...

“It’s impossible to deny not only the singing beans, giant toad and seemingly immortal footballers, but the whole complicated business with the not-actually-faeries, who (as most Candelariasians are now dimly aware) have settled in the southern Candelarian town of Gordon Bay City”
:- Candelaria and Marquez, WC48 Roster thread

...which is handy, considering The Holy Empire were, at that time, suffering the aftershocks of the event known only as ‘The Event’.

“Reality still seems a little soft around the corners. Distant mountain ranges occasionally seem to shift slightly; people's faces might briefly 'melt' for a split second before returning to normal; fountains spout blood; two giant wrestling figures, one in imperial robes, the other wearing a shimmering cloak, occasionally appear in the sky; distant ethereal screams occasionally pierce the air”
:- The Holy Empire, WC48 Roster Thread

The team they put out for this cup contained some names that were unusual, but somehow familiar, and included the much-loved Ug-ug from the World Cup 45 final.

Once again, The Holy Empire met Candelaria and Marquez in the final, yet this time the imperials would win out. In a bitter blow to Candelaria and Marquez’s sense of normalcy, the only goal of the final was attained when Simeone di Bradini, a man who had also represented Starbaydia sixty years prior and thus should not even have been eligible to play, crossed the ball for someone to score. The identity of the scorer depends on who you ask. Some say it was Ug-ug, others say Juan Tzimisces - a veteran of the very first World Cup who’d been retired for what mortals would call ‘decades’

“In the 76th minute, time seems to freeze. Coccino releases the ageless Di Bradini with an exquisite through ball, and Lopulalan struggles to keep up. Di Bradini crosses. O'Brien tries to head the ball away, but misses. Davies and Wilkinson are marking Comneno and Boradiates, caught static as both Tzimisces and Ug-Ug make surging runs from midfield. They simultaneously jump to head the ball, and for years to come, fans across realities will argue over who had the final touch.”
:- The Holy Empire, WC48 RP thread

In the next World Cup, the two sides would meet for the third time. By now, Candelaria and Marquez had learned to embrace their inner surrealist.

“All this used to be because of malevolent faeries, but isn’t any more, on account of the fact that we now know that they never actually existed, much to the surprise of the faeries themselves as much as anyone else… Oh, and because of the ongoing hidden conflict against the insane half-elf Sam Mc O’Neil and his army of mindless drones and waterfowl.”
:- Candelaria and Marquez, WC49 Roster thread

Their roster looked as standard as ever, consisting of good footballers plying their trade at home and abroad, with the team, and the stories, centering on the talismanic Jhanna Young.

The Holy Empire, on the other hand, decided to field a team of vengeful trans-dimensional aztec gods, still ‘managed’ by Tzimisces and di Bradini, if it is indeed possible to ‘manage’ a god.

In a pulsating final, Candelarissian normality and Imperial surrealism clashed for one final time.

“It was, of course, the end of the world.

As the Candelarians rose to celebrate their third goal in the World Cup 49 final, a goal which gave them a surely unassailable come from behind 3-1 lead against a bunch of gods with 9 minutes left to play, the apocalypse began.

The sky turned the colour of fire; the rain that had marked the second half turned to ash; the centre circle began to spew lava; and the Aztec gods seemed to grow in size until their terrifying countenance seemed to tower over all of Tundra Falls.

As the harvest of the damned began, and those who were not immediately sacrificed in the name of the dread Aztec gods began to run and scream with terror, as each member of the Candelarian squad - a team who were now paying the ultimate price for their temerity in victory - fell dead to the burning grass, it seemed over”
:- The Holy Empire, World Cup 49 RP thread

On this occasion, reality - or, at least our plane of it - was saved thanks to the unfolding, and firing, of a five-dimensional Reality Cannon. The three gunmen were The Holy Empire’s World Cup winning heroes of World Cup 48. Tzimisces, Ug-ug and Simeone di Bradini.

Through Jhanna’s wonder-strike, Candelaria and Marquez took the rubber match of the trilogy and, within two cycles, retired from the world stage. The Holy Empire play on, the Dreamed Realm now at peace.

Notes / Extras

Originally entitled Ug-Ug Knows Not How to Lose
Preceded by this trailer, released on March 31st 2020.
Completed and released early on Discord due to COVID-19 becoming a thing.
Written around March 3rd 2020. The sixth script to be started, but the second one to be finished.
Original idea was to compile a ‘Greatest XI’ of weird Holy Empire players, but the amount of research for that would have killed me.
Hopefully the last Idiot Project video to be recorded using Jeremy’s laptop mic. Audio quality (no pun intended) is better for the other Jeremy-narrated videos.
Originally supposed to only be five minutes long.
Partially inspired by the Genocide ending of Undertale.
The first song is a slowed-down version of by Creative Source’s cover of Bill Withers’s ’Who is He and What is He to You?’
Credits for this video, and only this video, feature the phrase ‘compiled by Jeremy Jaffacake’ instead of ‘written by Jeremy Jaffacake’, as C&M and THE do all the heavy lifting for this chapter.
Early music-only version
Various images. Some used, some not

Click the image to watch the video

Script
When you look at the most decorated teams in history, there’s a nation right at the top that you might not have heard of. Ten regional titles. Four more than any other nation in history. Pacitalia.

The Blue Foxes are one of many sides, along with Lamoni, 95X and Hypocria, who are noted for having largely ignored the World Cup in favour of Atlantian Oceania’s regional tournament - the AOCAF Cup.

Pacitalia had already won the cup four times when they travelled to Delaclava for AOCAF Cup 31. They would face the hosts in the quarter-final.

Delaclava had every reason to be confident going into the game. The AOCAF Cup hadn’t actually been contested for three cycles, meaning their opponents hadn’t played a competitive game for a number of years before the tournament. As of cycle 56, the side had qualified for the World Cup in each of their previous five attempts. Playing at home, they could even be considered narrow favourites for the tie.

What happened next is probably the most ridiculous result in the history of NS football. Had this match been in a World Cup, they would have broken the Scorigami chart.

“The scorinator will be Commerce Heights' xkoranate 0.3.2, using the NSFS formula with xkoranate-style modifiers …. Scorination will occur at 10-11
PM Eastern Time.”
:- Delaclava 2011-JUN-24

Notes / Extras
Star’s first vocal contribution so far.
Original version had a different half-time scene (3:21 - 4:00). Star recommended changing it. Two of these shots featured in the trailer for the series despite technically not appearing in the series itself.
The first chapter to be written. Originally the first chapter of Episode 3.
When this chapter was written, TIP3 was supposed to be a series of short 3-5 minute videos. Hence the lower run-time.
Features the track Devour which has a very cool video. The album, Vae Victis! is on Spotify and it’s epic.
Images from the video

by **Sarzonia** » Thu Jun 18, 2020 8:00 pm

Unlike the case with many World Cup qualifying campaigns bringing new faces and unfamiliar cultures, the group draw for the World Cup 85 group brings to mind the saying "familiarity brings contempt" for Sarzonia.

The Stars will make the short trip to Farfadillis to ay in Group C. Using pre-qualifying rankings, their opponents are led by world No. 6 Banija, followed by 14th ranked Free Republics and No. 25 Pasarga.

Even though the Stars have not yet faced Free Republics in their second return from a lengthy period of isolation, there's no shortage of intrigue between the two countries, as Sarzonian senior vice president and external affairs officer Bryan Conway canceled a proposed state visit to Free Republics in light of incendiary comments about Equestria made by a lawmaker from that country.

President Grant Haffner hasn't announced whether he would attend the match between Sarzonia and Free Republics, and wouldn't say whether he would meet with representatives from that nation's government while in Farfadillis. He said his focus would be on supporting the Stars.

"I've got enough on my plate," Haffner said. So, too do the Stars. Free Republics finished with a record of 13-6-5, finishing second in Group 10 behind Siovanija And Teusland. The Blue and White youngsters scored 73 goals and conceded 49. By comparison, Sarzonia scored 62 goals and allowed 41 and compiled a 15-4-5 mark in Group 7.

Banija, of course is very familiar to the Stars across multiple sports, including football. The Junior Stars faced Banija twice in AOCAF ILX, losing both matches to the Kadongo Kamu by two goals. The senior Sarzonian team also played Banija twice and lost both times by two-goal margins. Stars manager Kevin Connelly said the circumstances of this encounter couldn't be more different.

"We had young, unproven sides facing a truly powerful side during qualifying last cycle," he said. "This cycle, we're not the great unknown. They're familiar with us, too." Especially goalkeeper Carlton Sandt, who plays professionally for Lakiska SC in the Banijan Soccer League, whom Connelly and the rest of the managerial staff will still learn heavily on for information about teammates and opponents from the league.

Banija ran roughshod over Group 6, finishing with a mark of 22-1-1 with 79 goals for and 31 against.

The other opponents, Pasarga, are also familiar from the previous World Cup qualifying cycle, as the Wanderers defeated the Stars 1-0 in the semifinals of the Cup of Harmony en route to their title and Sarzonia's third place finish. The Wanderers finished with the same win-draw-loss record as the Stars at 15-4-5, earning runners up to Valanora in Group 13. They tallied 71 goals for to 39 against.

Midfielder Brady Reynolds said the team was not thinking about the semifinals defeat to Pasarga as they prepared for the World Cup 85 proper.

"We're not looking at the past. The present is much more important to us," he said.

The Stars have the fewest goals scored of any team in Group C with 62, and their 41 goals conceded is the second highest in the group, but captain Clayton Wilson warned critics to "throw out the stat sheets" with the proper about to get underway.

"A lot of things change when the ref blows the whistle and the ball kicks off," he said. "Especially when there's history between the teams." Or intrigue between the countries.

by **Ko-oren** » Fri Jun 19, 2020 3:51 am

12 Things We've Learned From Qualification

1) The Dragonflies are still wildly inconsistent
This is the one pet peeve with this team - or any team, really. Media such as Starblaydia's show that every team has to deal with this to some extent, but us Ko-orenites like one thing over anything else and that's consistency. It's the basis for our defensive outlook, even. And even with one of the Multiverse's best defences including some of the Multiverse's biggest players and talents, we cannot keep out teams that, after all of these years of development, we should beat comfortably. The trend is to break up the campaign into smaller bits of similar results, so here we go: LWLWWWBDDWWLW/LWWWLDBLWWWWW

Part I: LWL
Two early losses put us at 8th. Other big teams didn't start flawlessly either, so we were only three points behind the Holy Empire, Mattijana, and Port Ember. The loss against Tequilo started a small internal crisis, after which key players were given a larger voice in how the team is run.

Part II: WWW
With three good victories, albeit with tiny margins, the Dragonflies pushed up to second place, while Port Ember sank into a crisis of their own. At just 6 goals scored, it looked like the wins were coming but it all could come crashing down soon. The crisis was averted - but was it just a regression to the mean (in terms of results), or did the leadership group actually pay off this fast?

Part III: BDD
Always a risk with these formats: uneven group sizes. Everyone will have a bye day, and it's anyone's guess how a team crawls out of it. It's a much needed break for some, and a curse to others. We're in the latter category, with four points lost straight out of the bye... Or was it? The draws were against the Holy Empire and Port Ember - so honestly, these weren't bad results at all. We would've loved something bigger, but at this point, you're just happy to avoid the loss.

Part IV: WWLW
The remainder of the first half was mostly as planned. A 5-1 and 4-1 win gave us a small outlook on the larger wins of the second half of qualification, but the loss was unnecessary - and we refer back to the start: inconsistency will do us in. In second place in a tight group, the Holy Empire was out of view already. Port Ember, Devonta, Tequilo, Mattijana - it's too close for comfort.

Part V: L
Mattijana now hosted us, and like in the very first game, we lost. Cue another crisis: Mattijana was drawing nearer, Port Ember overtook us - this was the one thing we couldn't afford!

Part VI: WWW
Oh no, wait, we're good now. Among the casualties were Tequilo, who were now eight points behind in the race - as were Devonta and Mattijana - so the quest for second was reduced to a two-team marathon. They might not have been wins over our close rivals, but they were wins at least. We can always rely on the fact that every team is at least as inconsistent as us, so they're going to drop points.

Part VII: LDBL
That's eight points lost in four matchdays, and with the bye day, that's one point total while Port Ember was building a nice lead on us. That final L was Port Ember's, who were now sitting on a seven point cushion. With five games to go, that's not a place you want to be in. Juliasterinthen's job was again reduced to keeping the press out of the locker room. Dennis Lampshire wisely kept quiet, but he was ready to blow up the team once again. Yokota and the rest of the leadership group did a great job in presenting themselves, keeping the team together, and even including Lampshire. Chances of qualifying were reaching 0, but the team kept a cool head and got ready to run the table.

Part VIII: WWWWW - Port Ember in the meantime: BLDWW
Get back into the fight. Port Ember were on a bye day. Unfortunately for us, our opponent was the Holy Empire - but what a statement would it be if we could beat them! In a match that launched Cardiology departments across the nation into a lot of overtime work, Ko-oren won 4-3! The Holy Empire did us a solid one by beating Port Ember as they got out of their bye day, and Juliasterinthen mixed up the team a little. Consistency is good, but it often leads to predictability, which is a major problem for the Dragonflies. And always has been: that's consistency for you. By now, all selected players had at least been a substitute once, and the 5-3-2 was more of a 4-4-2 or 5-4-1 in some games. Anything to keep our opponents guessing. Port Ember continued to ruin their own chances, while the Dragonflies kept winning. By the time Port Ember were winning again, Ko-oren had a small and fragile lead, but it was enough, and despite them winning their last two games by a combined 10-2 scoreline, the Dragonflies won both of their last games by a combined 6-0. The comeback was real.

2) This is an all-time great Dragonflies team
Sure, complain about the weird results fluctuating all over the place - but the team rallied, won five times in a row to close out the campaign, following our first AOCAF win, sealing our third consecutive successful World Cup qualification: this is an all-time great team. Remember the teams of the late 60s to mid 70s: even they couldn't string together World Cup qualifications (but they did win a Cup of Harmony in between). One more World Cup qualification would make the current streak our longest streak ever (which currently belongs to 4 straight World Cups from 69 till 72).

3) This team has no generational issues
Again, remember those late 60s to mid 70s teams? They relied on a single group of players at the same age, and when they were retiring, the national team went with them. Juliasterinthen was a member of that team, and has made sure that the same doesn't happen again. Despite relying on veterans like Dalton (31), Brogley (33), Vallotton (30), or Vermelho (30), there is a healthy amount of players under 25 that even get starts. Hellegeland, Benjamin, Longchambon, they're the next generation, and they are on the starting XI already. The generation under 20 is harder to pinpoint, but even guys like Yerowie have already made an appearance.

4) This team can score
The defensive record was so-so, but the front five made up for that with a very decent production. 5-1, 4-1, a few 3-0s, from varying formations, including about 10 different players. This is a versatile team, even if it might not look like it, and hopefully it catches our World Cup group mates off-guard. The midfield-striker combinations could look like anything from

Yokota - Janoreirinthen
      Longchambon
  Vallotton
          Turner

to

Yokota
yChibwod     Batchelor
      Longchambon
Nagamine     Noya

and could see appearances from those mentioned above to Ulysse, Pirastadhaunden, or even an attack-minded defender. Our weakness does come from the forward line, as Turner and Nagamine definitely aren't world-class players. They're confident and accurate enough to score here and there, but they're not players who can take defenders out of position, or generate big chances themselves.

5) We're in a group with Vilita, Kita-Hinode, and Main Nation Ministry
Vilita and Kita-Hinode are two teams that we always desperately wanted a rivalry with, but we were always too small of a team to appear on these World Cup winners' radars. Now, however, Vilita has seen us win an AOCAF (in the same 'southwestern' bracket even), and we could just be seen as a threat. It's on us to prove that we're on their level (same as with Kita-Hinode). Versus Kita-Hinode, it will at least be a fun reunion with Metharom, playing for Advance Alara on the Dragonfly Archipelago. Main Nation Ministry is a team we've faced in several sports, but never in this sport at this high a level. It's up to us to keep them under us (unless, of course, we both qualify for the Round of 16). Anyway, this is a fun group with teams that we've looked up to for a long time. Time to take them down. But not too hard, we still want them to like us.

6) yChibwod is going to be a star
Long overlooked because of his position (winger), yChibwod has gotten the opportunity to play in his natural position on the national team for a few matches. Paired with Batchelor or Ulysse on the other wing, we can see that the team doesn't deal with wingers that naturally, but that yChibwod is a talent on the level of Longchambon. Sure, they're the same age, but Longchambon has been on the team for several years already, and secured a big-money move to Eura's Revolutionaries. yChibwod's rise to prominence has been much quieter, much slower, but it looks like the Mawryshire youngster can go at least as far. Pacy and with great control over the ball, he is a wonderful addition to the team. If only he can be a bit more productive around the goal, or learn to play more than just one position (such as attacking midfielder).

7) The defence lacks experience
The 5-man back line is a feature of all Dragonfly teams going back to the 60s (in World Cup terms), and has always bolstered the biggest players from the Archipelago. This time around, though, Juliasterinthen has selected a few youngsters. Together they've been our defence for a while now, but small problems keep popping up. Lacking physicality and decisiveness, they've cost us goals. Lampshire was appointed as the main man at the back, but his individualist tendencies keep him from being a true leader. Van Schelven, Benjamin, and Mizuno are fantastic defenders that will go far (Benjamin already with a massive transfer for Cosumar, for insteance), but they're not at the level yet where you can put them in the back and let them figure everything out for themselves. Until at least one of them can step up (which will take a few years still), we will keep having trouble.

8) The search for a captain continues
Yokota has filled the role with aplomb, but isn't the same kind of leader as Juliasterinthen and assistant coach Davenport. Setting up a leadership group with the six most experienced players for them to share their vision is a great start, but we're still without a single player for the team to rally around. Preferably a defender, but after 7), you can tell we're still a few years off.

9) The 5-3-2 is here to stay
This point is raised every single cycle, but nobody's come up with a better system yet. The 5-3-2 is here to stay, flaws and all. The midfield is invisible and underpowered, the strikers barely get decent input, but it's still a versatile system at its core and Juliasterinthen is committed to wrangling all possible versatility from it. We've seen a few iterations (the 5-man back line turning into 4 when in possession was one iteration, for instance, and the current iteration is playing with the midfielder roles), but the defence is hard to beat and we like it that way.

X) Ko-oren uses a base-12 system
X)? What the hell is X)? It's never been a secret, but we're base-12. We haven't used base-12 for jersey numbers, to keep things easy for international viewers, but these lists go from 9 to X, from X to =, and from = to 10. Which is 12.

=) The goal is Quarterfinals or Bust
A tough target to set as barely a top 20 nation, but this Round of 16 nightmare has haunted us long enough. Even the famed 60s and 70s teams couldn't breach into the final 8. We can't really expect this current team to go that far. But it'll always stay our goal, until we maybe, ever, finally get there. First we'll have to get to the knockouts, which will be hard enough. Once there, however, we will not settle for another one-and-done campaign. We will not go 0-8 in the Round of 16.

10) Only a handful of our rivals followed us into the World Cup
We would've loved to see more familiar faces, but it looks like we'll have to go far into the Cup if we want to run into Taeshan, Banija, Zwangzug - although they're all in Groups A-D. Hopefully we will see Kandorith, Gyatso-Kai, Darmen, Cosumar, Osarius, and the like in future World Cups. Maybe we'll even get a new rivalry out of the current one?

NS World Cup Fantasy Qualification

And... we're done! Again, many lessons learned, but this version was a far smoother operation than the inaugural season. As for the results...

Ko-oren	742
T. Septentrionale	735
Eternal Empire	731
Mavinet	727
Flavovespia	723

The host, somehow, wins again, casting ever more doubt on the integrity of the organisation.

In order to get a winning score, you need all of your 15 choices to get an average of 49.5 points (50*15=742.5). Choices that would have gotten you close to that amount:
Quebec (50), Astograth (50), Poafmersia (50), Xanneria (49), Mercedini (48), Newmanistan (48), which could all be picked up for 0.64 (Quebec), 0.67 (Astograth) to 21.58 (Mercedini) KPB points. The other three teams were about 10-15 KPB. So, taking that average of about 11 points, times 15 choices, equals 165 - which fits into your allotted 200 KPB very nicely! Fantasy, it seems, is a solvable game - but unfortunately, not every qualifying group has such a nice team for the taking. Also, these six teams finished 3rd, 4th, or even 5th in their groups. It seems like the strategy for a lot of contestants is to pick a bunch of very cheap teams and a few very expensive teams, but maybe taking those safe Pot 3 to 5 teams is the way to go. What will everyone do with this knowledge?

See you soon for Fantasy, season 3!

by **Banija** » Fri Jun 19, 2020 7:44 am

Part XV

Setting is early morning Busukuma, four days after the weapons landed on Farfadillis

Today was the deadline. It had been a week since the nuclear weapons had landed on Farfadillis. And the Banijans still hadn't agreed on an aid package. Many of Banija's biggest power players were sitting in a room, knowing that each day that ticked without the Banijans announcing what exactly they'd do to help Farfadillis made them look worse and worse in the eyes of the international community. They absolutely had to come up with some kind of solution, one that would have been worth waiting days for.

Of course, four days isnt' a terribly long time- but four days doing, essentially, nothing besides political damage control would look bad. The Patriarch of Herzegovina had actually telephoned the men in this room, offering an ambitious idea- a Missionary volunteer program, ran and operated by the Church, that would serve as the focal point of Banija's relief services on the ground. Kobe Azizi had actually quite liked the idea, at the beginning. The ability of the church, with state backing, to run the relief effort would have many advantages. But after sounding out the idea, it had to be abandoned. They had sounded out the optics, and frankly, they had looked terrible.

It would damage Banija's international credibility, by a significant amount, if the Banijans in any way looked opportunistic in the wake of 5 of their nuclear bombs falling on Farfadillis. And having the church operate the relief program, of course, would look just like that. Isebantu Mutungi had been very adamant about that- he said that it'd look like we'd be profiting off of disaster, using it to force religion down the throats of those who didn't ask for the Mormon faith, even if the missionaries were there to heal both land and soul. So the idea was ultimately abandoned.

The people in the room were as follows. The Katikkiro, Kobe Azizi. The Deputy Katikkiro. The Kiongozi, the leader of the Collective Resistance Union, was here as well. The Minister of Defense, Amanuel Amsalu. They were joined by His Majesty, the Kabaka, who was technically running the show at this meeting. The Isebantu would be here as well. After the Kabaka administered the formalities, he turned the meeting over to Isebantu Mutungi. "Has everyone hear seen the Euran Foreign Ministry statement?" The Isebantu said. Most nodded, but a few had not. "Ok, then let me read the statement to you." And as an aide passed out copies of the statement, the Isebantu read it.

"We, here at the foreign Ministry, think that Eura probably speaks for a lot more than Eura here. Now, we've got good relations with Eura- their Prime Minister came to the country shortly after the death of Albert III and the coronation of Mwanga. But their concerns are probably shared by a fair bit of the international community. Some of their ideas, are good, Some of them, are uncomfortable. And, of course, there's one thing in there that we should outright reject. I recommend that we respond to this letter, directly, but publicly. For one, theirs is a public statement, so responding publicly isn't bad. But secondly, so the rest of the multiverse can see our seriousness regarding this situation."

"That's fair." Said the Kabaka. "Anyone have any objections to that?" Nobody said anything. "Ok, let's get this figured out. First, of course, their statement talks about their frank discussions with our ambassador in Bastion. My son and I were briefed on those discussions- it is essentially what has been outlined in this public statement. And now, the statement talks about Eura sending the full might of the Euran Government to help Farfadillis recover. It looks like their military forces will be leading the relief effort? As far as I'm concerned, Eura is considered an ally to the Banijan people. I'm not a big expert on how their political system works, but if that's how it is, it's not a big deal to Banija."

"What really matters here, is the second part of the statement. They continue with how they will provide aide to Farfadillis. That's all well and good, of course. The next part, is talking about decommissioning our nuclear weapons. We're already undertaking steps with Siovanija & Teusland to make sure this weapons, so once again, there isn't much to discuss here." THe Kabaka paused, and then continued. "The re-establishment of the nuclear-free zone is an open-ended question for the Lukiiko, isn't it? It's best that I not comment."

"They also talk about the establishment of an international inquiry. Thoughts?"

"International inquiry?" Said the Deputy Katikkiro.

"Investigation." Said the Isebantu. "Of course, our investigation is happening right now. They want us, naturally, to be transparent with the Banijan investigation, the joint one we are having with Borograd. That can happen. But a separate, international inquiry? Well, that's a domestic political decision, is it not?" And the Isebantu looked at the three elected politicians in the room.

"We should've brought the other party leader here." Said the Katikkiro. "Eh, regardless, we can figure this out now. Look, of course, as our investigation concludes, an international inquiry is not the worst idea. For one, it will be able to confirm our version of events. But there should be some sort of protection for Banijans. For one, we can't have an unlimited number of international investigators. A Euran investigation, and then a Vanorian one, and then a Commonwealth one, etc... We will be investigating forever. We'll need to create some sort of temporary international body to run the investigation, with our cooperation. Whoever wants an investigation can agree to it."

"We must also realize, with an international inquiry, we cannot just allow the entire report to go public." Said Amanuel Amsalu, the Minister of Defense. "There is a bunch of sensitive military information at risk. Now, our joint investigation with Siovanija & Teusland is not a problem- there is complete trust between Busukuma and Borograd. And, of course, we know that Borograd won't go public with any of our military information. But how do we know Canterlot won't? Or Raynor City won't? Or Quebec City, or Bastion? There's a lot at stake, and a lot of sensitive information. We'll have to have some sort of redacted, public version of an inquiry, and then the longer, unredacted one to only be shared with select governments. That unredacted one, naturally, would have to be shared with somebody in Farfadillis- who, of course, we're unsure."

Then Kobe Azizi, the Katikkiro, began talking. "As for the last part of the statement- there is no question about the legitimacy of this Government. We aren't even a third of the way into our term. Until the Lukiiko explicitly demonstrates its lack of confidence in this Government, we will continue to serve. Abandoning the post in a time of crisis is unconscionable." The Deputy Katikkiro and the Minister of Defense nodded, while the Kiongozi's expression was unreadable. "Now we've got that out of the way, let's talk about our aid programs." And the men talked about the crafting of Banija's aid program. They also decided they wouldn't respond in a direct, public letter to Eura- they would simply respond in a public statement."

Setting is Ministerial Statements at the Lukiiko

"All rise for the Katikkiro!" The Mkiikos rose as the Katikkiro strode to the front of the Lukiiko. "Kobe Azizi to speak!"

"Thank you, Mr. Speaker." Began Kobe Azizi. "Of course, most of the country is watching as I address the Lukiiko today. We are going to talk about what we have spent the last five days hammering out. This country's official response to the tragic Farfadillis attacks. An attack on Banija's sovereignty, yes, but primarily and savagely a vicious attack on the people of Farfadillis. Banijan nuclear weapons were never meant to launch a first strike attack on anybody."

"Especially on our neighbors in Farfadillis. It is, indeed, the reality. A nation that has been in chaos for so long should not have been the victim here. Let us have a moment of silence and prayer for those men and women who lost their lives on the other side of the Shango-Fogoa Arm." And the Katikkiro, and the rest of the Mkiikos, were silent for around 10 seconds. "Thank you. Now, we have said that the Kingdom of Banija would be at the forefront of any response. The multiverse in general is responding, and Banija has a special responsibility to Farfadillis. This is complicated by the fact that without a central government, negotiations are difficult. Our responses must, essentially, be decided upon unilaterally and then adjusted for what we see on the ground."

"That is why I am proud to announce a tough agreement, hammered out between this Government and the opposition. A bipartisan agreement. One that will see quite a bit of cash invested into Farfadillis, but for the better. We wanted to go beyond simply giving money. We wanted to provide a solution that would both bring aid immediately, and prepare the country to give aid long-term. We have short-term, immediate measures before we start working towards long-term measures. In the short-term? We will provide direct aid to each state government in Farfadillis, in the form of $3 billion NSDs, in immediate aid, to each state government. The Lukiiko will take those up, so those funds should be released within a week's time."

"Furthermore, we want to do more than just provide cash, although cash influx is important. Here is what we will do. Starting this week, unarmed members of the Banijan armed forces will go to Farfadillis and provide immediate humanitarian assistance. Doctors to provide healthcare, people to provide humanitarian equipment, etc... This is what we need to do. In the meantime, we will be in the process of setting up a brand new, government-sponsored, international volunteer program. It will be called the "Cross-Arm Volunteer Corps." It will be a program used for Banijans to be able to answer the call, to serve their country by serving in Farfadillis."

"The program will be up and running in 3-4 months time- these programs do not come out of nothing. It will be open to all able-bodied adults who are Banijan citizens, although recent high school and college graduates will be targeted. This program will run for 5 years, with terms of service being 12 months. This will reflect our long-term commitment to helping Farfadillis recover. There will, of course, be incentive to participating in this program- namely, small academic scholarships to college for high school graduates, and student debt payments for college grads. They will replace our unarmed members of the armed forces once they are up and running. They will provide technical assistance, working with governments and NGOs to provide direct care, improve agriculture, help establish strong structures, and make Farfadillis stronger."

"We also, of course, have a significant Farf refugee population in Banija already, centered in Busukuma. Because of this, we will work to expand the refugee program to ensure refugees, forced out by these attacks, will have a place to live. We will increase the number of those eligible to enter the country, and speed up processing. We open our arms to those who need help, and Farves need the help right now. This country is a friend of Farfadillis, and we will work to make sure that Farfadillis is stronger than ever. We will stand together in the face of darkness, and the forces of light will find their way."

"Laslty, there has been talk of an international inquiry. There are, of course, reasonable limitations for such an inquiry. Primarily, of course, being one, joint international inquiry between interested nations. And, of course, public revelation of sensitive military information is not a good idea. But we are not opposed, in principle, to a substantive international inquiry to help ensure everyone understands the truth of what happened five days ago." Mkiikos on the government benches thunderously applauded him as his speech came to a close.

by **Terre Septentrionale** » Fri Jun 19, 2020 5:18 pm

Qualifications recap

Ville Jacques-Cartier, DC - It's Terre Septentrionale's third World Cup cycle and they're qualified for it! That's very impressive, there's other nations, like Prusy Krolewskie/Alpine Union who never participated in the World Cup in 7 or 8 attempts. It's time for a qualifications recap.

Friendly #1 - Terre Septentrionale 3–4 HUElavia
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Zizic, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Jedrzejczyk, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kosciukiewicz, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Blaszczykowski, Zalwowska, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): Fontaine (Jedrzejczyk), Cwierczakiewiczowa (Fontaine), Waclawczyk (Fontaine)

Friendly #2 - Cassadaigua 3–0 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: O'Byrne - Niedzwiecki, Zubrowska, Zaborowska - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zizic, Tkocz, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): None

Friendly #3 -Terre Septentrionale 1-0 Torisakia
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Zaborowska, Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Swierczewski, Kolodziejczyk, Pajaczkowski - Maillé-Chicoine, McCracken
Subs: Pietrzkiewicz, Blaszczykowski, Giroux
Goalscorers (assists): Kolodziejczyk (Ksiezniakiewicz)

Friendly #4 - Poafmersia 2–3 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Zubrowska, Brzezanczyk, Normandin, Tkocz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Pietrzkiewicz, Zalwowska, Kosciukiewicz
Goalscorers (assists): Sandie McCracken (Kolodziejczyk), Cwierczakiewiczowa (None), Sandie McCracken (Fontaine)

Matchday 1 - Saturday may 23rd 2026 - Chromatika 2–3 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zaborowska, Swierczewski, Kosciukiewicz
Goalscorers (assists): Roksana Kolodziejczyk (Sandie McCracken), Sandrine Fontaine (None), Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Élisabeth Normandin)

Matchday 2 - Sunday may 31st 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 3–2 Sabalonia
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Zubrowska, Brzezanczyk, Tkocz, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, Maillé-Chicoine
Subs: Blaszczykowski, Pietrzkiewicz, Zalwowska
Goalscorers (assists): Kévin Maillé-Chicoine (Sandrine Fontaine), Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Roksana Kolodziejczyk), Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk (Sandrine Fontaine)

Matchday 3 - Wednesday june 3rd 2026 - Savojarna 0–0 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zizic, Tkocz, Kosciukiewicz
Goalscorers (assists): None

Matchday 5 - Wednesday june 10th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 4–4 Sanctanus
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zaborowska, Swierczewski, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): Sandrine Fontaine (Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk), Sandie McCracken (Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa), Slawomir Skrzeszewski (None), Roksana Kolodziejczyk (Sandrine Fontaine)

Matchday 6 - Saturday june 13th 2026 - Adyatin 1–4 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Zubrowska, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Kosciukiewicz - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zizic, Zaborowska, Jedrzejczyk
Goalscorers (assists): Sandrine Fontaine (Roksana Kolodziejczyk), Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Jedrzej Kosciukiewicz), Élisabeth Normandin (Unassisted) and Sandrine Fontaine (Alicja Jedrzejczyk).

Matchday 7 - Wednesday june 17th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 5–3 The Jovannic
Starting XI: Kwietniewska - Zubrowska, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Wieszczycki, Tkocz, Swierczewski
Goalscorers (assists): Élisabeth Normandin (Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk), Sandie McCracken (Roksana Kolodziejczyk), Sandrine Fontaine (Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa), Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Roksana Kolodziejczyk), Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk (Tymoteusz Swierczewski)

Matchday 8 - Sunday june 21st 2026 - Wanarpu 0–1 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Zubrowska, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, Maillé-Chicoine
Subs: Blaszczykowski, Jedrzejczyk, Pajaczkowski
Goalscorers (assists): Sandrine Fontaine (Roksana Kolodziejczyk)

Matchday 9 - Wednesday june 24th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 1–3 Eura
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zizic, Kosciukiewicz, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk)

Matchday 10 - Sunday june 28th 2026 - Northwest Kalactin 3–1 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Tkocz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zubrowska, Swierczewski, Sobieszczyk
Goalscorers (assists): Roksana Kolodziejczyk (direct free kick)

Matchday 11 - Thursday july 2nd 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 2–5 Eshan
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Pajaczkowski, Swierczewski, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Sandrine Fontaine), Roksana Kolodziejczyk (Tymoteusz Swierczewski)

Matchday 12 - Sunday july 5th 2026 - Alba and Cymru 1–1 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Tkocz, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zizic, Zaborowska, Kosciukiewicz
Goalscorers (assists): Sandie McCracken (Sandrine Fontaine)

Matchday 13 - Wednesday july 8th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 2–1 The Sarian
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zubrowska, Kosciukiewicz, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): Roksana Kolodziejczyk (direct free kick), Élisabeth Normandin (corner kick)

Matchday 14 - Saturday july 18th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 0–4 Chromatika
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zubrowska, Tkocz, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): None

Matchday 15 - Wednesday july 22 2026 - Sabalonia 3–3 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: O'Byrne - Niedzwiecki, Zubrowska, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Kosciukiewicz - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zaborowska, Tkocz, Zalwowska
Goalscorers (assists): Roksana Kolodziejczyk (Sandrine Fontaine), Yannick Ksiezniakiewicz (corner kick), Amelia Zalwowska (Sandie McCracken)

Matchday 16 - Sunday july 26th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 3–3 Savojarna
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zubrowska, Jedrzejczyk, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): Sandrine Fontaine (Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk), Sandie McCracken (Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa), Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Sandrine Fontaine)

Matchday 18 - Sunday august 2nd 2026 - Sanctanus 1–2 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Kwietniewska - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Tkocz, Ksiezniakiewicz, Swierczewski, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, Maillé-Chicoine
Subs: Zizic, Pajaczkowski, Fernando
Goalscorers (assists): Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Roksana Kolodziejczyk), Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk (Tymoteusz Swierczewski)

Matchday 19 - Wednesday august 5th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 5–2 Adyatin
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Zizic, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Pietrzkiewicz, Zaborowska, Swierczewski
Goalscorers (assists): Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Sandrine Fontaine), Sandrine Fontaine (Sandie McCracken), Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (penalty), Sandie McCracken (Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk), Roksana Kolodziejczyk (unassisted)

Matchday 20 - Sunday august 9th 2026 - The Jovannic 4–4 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: O'Byrne - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Maillé-Chicoine, McCracken
Subs: Zubrowska, Jedrzejczyk, Swierczewski
Goalscorers (assists): Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk (Sandrine Fontaine), Élisabeth Normandin (corner kick), Sandrine Fontaine (Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk), Kévin Maillé-Chicoine (Roksana Kolodziejczyk)

Matchday 21 - Wednesday august 12th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 4–1 Wanarpu
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Pietrzkiewicz, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Tkocz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Maillé-Chicoine, McCracken
Subs: Zaborowska, Pajaczkowski, Zalwowska
Goalscorers (assists): Sandie McCracken (Sandrine Fontaine), Sandrine Fontaine (Roksana Kolodziejczyk), Élisabeth Normandin (unassisted), Sandie McCracken (penalty)

Matchday 22 - Sunday august 16th 2026 - Eura 2–0 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Maillé-Chicoine, McCracken
Subs: Zubrowska, Kosciukiewicz, Swierczewski
Goalscorers (assists): None

Matchday 23 - Wednesday august 19th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 0–0 Northwest Kalactin
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk, Zaborowska - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - McCracken
Subs: Zizic, Jedrzejczyk, Cwierczakiewiczowa
Goalscorers (assists): None

Matchday 24 - Sunday august 23rd 2026 - Eshan 0–1 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zubrowska, Zaborowska, Swierczewski
Goalscorers (assists): Sandrine Fontaine (Roksana Kolodziejczyk)

Matchday 25 - Wednesday august 26th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale 1–0 Alba and Cymru
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Jedrzejczyk, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Kosciukiewicz - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zaborowska, Swierczewski, Maillé-Chicoine
Goalscorers (assists): Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa (Sandrine Fontaine)

Matchday 26 - Sunday august 30th 2026 - The Sarian 0–1 Terre Septentrionale
Starting XI: Vainqueur - Niedzwiecki, Skrzeszewski, Brzezanczyk - Normandin, Ksiezniakiewicz, Fontaine, Kolodziejczyk, Waclawczyk - Cwierczakiewiczowa, McCracken
Subs: Zizic, Zaborowska, Kosciukiewicz
Goalscorers (assists): Yannick Ksiezniakiewicz (Roksana Kolodziejczyk)

Terre Septentrionale started off on the right foot by beating Chromatika 3-2 on matchday 1. The Nordiques won the next one, drew two games on matchdays 3 and 5, with a bye in the middle. Then won against Adyatin, The Jovannic and Wanarpu and they were in 1st place after matchday 8. The Reprezentacja Nordycki lost three games in a row (against Eura, Northwest Kalactin and Eshan) and drew against Alba and Cymru on matchday 12. They were 4th in the standings.

Terre Septentrionale beat The Sarian on matchday 13 just before the break. Then they lost against Chromatika and drew two games: against Sabalonia and Savojarna. The Northmen had a bye on matchday 16 and they were 7th after this matchday. After their bye, Terre Septentrionale won two games in a row, against Sanctanus and Adyatin before drawing against The Jovannic and winning versus Wanarpu. The Nordiques were back in 2nd place after matchday 21. Terre Septentrionale lost against Eura and drew against Northwest Kalactin and dropped to 4th place after matchday 23. The Reprezentacja Nordycki won their three remaining games, each by a score of 1-0, and finished in 2nd place. They earned a spot in the World Cup for the first time in their history!

Terre Septentrionale will soon know wether they play in Farfadillis or in Mriin. They are in group G with their qualifying mate Eura (which beat us two times), Baker Park and Siovanija And Teusland. The schedule will be released tonight.

Wlodzimierz Pietruszewski,
Senior writer,
La tribune septentrionale

by **Taeshan** » Sat Jun 20, 2020 10:27 am

Taeshan 0-3 Banija
Yaton Insurance Park, Yaton, Atlantea Island, Taeshan
Nzo 24', Okparra 79, Jideofor 88'

"Miles a less than stellar friendly before the World Cup in the send off game. 3 goals scored for the Banijan side, nothing to show for the Purple Knights your thoughts."

"We may not be ready for the upcoming World Cup. It was a weak performance really. I understand this is a warm up game, and they also managed to score 4 on us in the pre-qualifying friendlies, but this is just a shameful performance from the side."

"Shiloh was not in camp for this game, but will obviously be joining the side for the World Cup. What caused you to want to keep him out of this match?"

"Well there were two things really going on. He is likely to move on from his current situation in Cosumar, maybe not the most stable place to be and we felt he needed the beginning of the international break to get some things together and start figuring out what his next move will be. Listen, the next match will be his 100th Cap, he is also the captain of this team. I feel it's his right to miss a game like that. We also got a chance to see some things. We moved Larson to the wing, started Brubaker and Pantalaimon up top, giving Nkitilina the second half to come against tired legs."

"What about Banija can you use in the coming games at the World Cup?"

"Banija and Equestria are two of the biggest rivals in the world. Two very good AO sides. We've prepared for Equestria before with matches against Banija, and we felt this was a big chance. I know we got lucky in the last World Cup with Aidan's winner against Equestria. I know there is a lot of people in the press, and in the country who think that this World Cup draw is a death knell for the Knights. I don't think that. We've had big odds before."

"So close to getting a 2nd seed, what does that .12 ranking difference say to you?"

"Well we win a few more games instead of all these zero zero ties. We've scored more goals in qualifying than we have up until this point in my managerial career with Taeshan. That's in 24 games vs 36. We should have done a better job in the other games scoring, rather than say put up for against Eastfield Lodge, and 10 against TAYTO. How about a 1 goal win in A Flock of Seagulls. Would that have been so hard?"

"Are you happy to have a chance to play once again against The Holy Empire after they knocked you out in the last World Cup?"

"Revenge would be fun. But I think getting points from the previous games will matter more. If we go into our game against The Holy Empire needing a win to advance on matchday 3, I think we've already really screwed the pooch."

by **Zwangzug** » Sat Jun 20, 2020 7:36 pm

The ~~Spenson~~ Star REALMS

In the eighty-fifth World Cup, Zwangzug have been drawn against...Farfadillis, who beat us in the last group stage before going on to win the whole thing, HUElavia, who beat us in the last group stage in a dramatic finish before losing out on tiebreakers, and Turori, who split with us in the Eagles' Cup group stage. I was supposed to do a preview but you already know these teams and I don't really want to revisit last cycle, so instead, I tried to list the 32 qualifiers by the Star Realms card they most resemble. Original deck only, no expansions, or we'd be here all day.

HUElavia: Imperial Fighter. What better choice for "Los Amarillos" than the bright yellow Star Empire ship? Unlike many of the Empire craft, however, it doesn't let you draw a card, because we don't think they're really into draws.

Zwangzug: Federation Shuttle. An unassuming Trade Federation ship, but one that can bolster the defenses when need be.

Turori: Blob Wheel. The Blob are bright green and work well in alliances together. And after all, you can't spell "wheel" without "Eel."

Farfadillis: Missile Mech. The most powerful of the Machine Cult ships, capable of destroying any base on its own and then some. Because who needs defense.

Taeshan: Defense Center. This should be self-explanatory; they're an outpost with strength 5, and have the option to add authority or combat every turn.

Kelssek: Embassy Yacht. The influential nation of Kelssek wields lots of soft power both in the World Assembly and in sporting events like the Olympics.

The Holy Empire: Fleet HQ. This vibrant yellow base is the center of Imperial power, bolstering every ship in its vicinity.

Equestria: Blob Carrier. We don't really know what this powerful Blob entity is, but it's probably not human.

Free Republics: Survey Ship. Political spectators in the Free Republics must want to draw a card and look ahead to see what's next, but they risk their international future being scrapped.

Banija: Missile Bot. Hey look! Missiles! Oh wait, that's not a good thing.

Sarzonia: Corvette. The "Stars" need a simple yet effective ship from the Star Empire.

Pasarga: Patrol Mech. The "Wanderers" are like a fast-moving ship, but under the right circumstances they can use their scrap powers to win a war of attrition.

Ko-oren: Blob World. A bright green base with its own defenses, but that can function either to attack or draw more.

Vilita: Freighter. The nation is widely known for its iconic brands, from Tropicorp to Vilaye Energy Drink, and requires trade infrastructure to make its products move.

Kita-Hinode: Battle Mech. This team seems mostly human, but it has a few cyborg elements.

Main Nation Ministry: Trading Post. This bureaucracy has a tight border security; it needs a simple base to keep tabs on who goes in and out.

Cassadaigua: Junkyard. This historic team burns through uniform numbers as if they were scrapping them and removing them from the game entirely.

Reçueçn: Stealth Needle. "Les Licornes" are adaptable and diverse, and a unicorn's horn is sort of needle-like, I guess.

Drawkland: Mothership. They're not exactly human, but more importantly, they're cost 7. So we're going with it.

Mriin: Blob Destroyer. The "Reavers" are certainly alien, if not outright piratical.

95X: Cutter. This country places a high importance on public transport, and needs a reliable, simple blue ship to get from point A to point B.

Valanora: Royal Redoubt. They certainly are an empire, and anything that needs six combat to break down is pretty darn eternal.

Nephara: Brain World. The Machine Cult's transformation of supercomputers to deities is paralleled only by Nepharim worship of a funny-looking rock.

Audioslavia: Recycling Station. The Audioslavian ability to reuse and transform media from the past into new and captivating videography makes it a threat no matter what it has on hand.

Commonwealth of Baker Park: The Hive. Because they're Bees. Not the ones from the Babbage Islands though, those are different. We've been through this.

Siovanija And Teusland: Mech World. Allegedly they can ally with everybody, but really, they're part of the red faction having to deal with all those missiles and not very happy about it.

Eura: War World. The Bastion Arena is surely a place where Victors can be found.

Terra Septentrionale: Battle Cruiser. When it gives its all, this ship can both deal combat and destroying a base, good for secularists who need to quickly get the jump on the Cult.

Hampton Island: Port of Call. This can support the defense and hang around for a while, but really it just gives you lots of money.

Starblaydia: Dreadnaught. A powerful Star Empire force that could fill others with dread. Or that could be scrapped.

Qasden: Battle Blob. I don't really know what this is either, but it can attack.

Brenecia: Machine Base. It's a lot like Nephara, but not quite as good.

[What is this I don't even. -ed]

by **Kita-Hinode** » Sat Jun 20, 2020 8:05 pm

Association football (known by names such as soccer, footy, fútbol, futbol, fussball, fotball, futbols, futbolas, futbalo, calcio, kopaná, kurat al-qadam, zúqiú, fodbold, voetbal, jalkapallo, pekhburti, kajbumba, jalgamiaccy, ball-coise, nogomet, chukku, pelada, the Beautiful Game and that game Krytenia keeps choking at) is a team sport disputed with a spherical ball by two teams of eleven players. And people sure play it. So much so that, yearly, nations from across the multiverse play for the right of claiming themselves World Champions via this one tournament called the World Cup. Thirty-two teams qualify for the tournament and then, after a boatload of games, a champion is crowned.

And then someone decides to try and do a simulation of that tournament for no good reason. This is their story. I'd also recommend you to put this to play on the background while you read. No reason just felt like giving you a nice little song to listen to. Can't say that you're blowing your time away by reading this now, right? Not like you can tell me otherwise anyway.

Originally, my idea was to run an amateur event featuring the best sides the multiverse could throw up, a bit of an also-ran to the World Cup proper. There was a key problem that stopped my plans, however: the lack of more entries than one. So why not turn a negative into a positive, plus it's not like people haven't been doing simulations of tournaments left and right. You could say it's a way to spend the time while things don't return to some sort of normality. I welcome the idea of messing around with a video game equalling to hard work, to be honest.

So throughout the week, I'd make little edits to an old game and soon enough, I had a decent enough list of World Cup qualifiers and some teams made for the bantz. If you're not in this, don't feel bad: I mostly went through teams I could make in a rush and whoever had qualified by the time I worked on them. You're not any less or more important than anyone else because of this. I like to see myself as a man of the people. Except for the brats that live on the building in front of my place who communicate with each other via yelling from the balcony. They can fuck off. You're OK though.

Ah, right, you're probably wondering how I got Farfadillis, Qasden and Equestria in. Actually, I got the Farves' roster via DM. As to Qasden and Equestria...

Sometimes, you got to turn negatives into positives more often, you know.

Our World Cup starts with a draw. Unlike the actual World Cup, a lack of pots and anything that resembles coordination results in some rather questionable groups. Both hosts found themselves in a group with Vilita and newbies Hampton Island while a sorta-Group of Death formed in Group F between Starblaydia, Valanora, the Hinodejin Empire and Reçuecn. Group A instead became a duel between the Equestrians, Taeshan, The Holy Empire and the state of Siovania and Teusland, one of the casualties of Sensible World of Soccer's limitations. In those days, an Amiga couldn't really put up with some certain large names.

The Main Nation Ministry is now under the more ominous (and certainly villainous) name of The Ministry, Terre Septentrionale saw the Terre bit of their name take a tour out through the alps while the land of the Teus became Siovania and Teus. The World Cup also started with a draw. With an audience of around ten on Discord, Taeshan and The Holy Empire spent about five minutes of literally not scoring a single goal. This, of course, was then followed by a Group B fixture where the Dagans went and beat Baker Park for a scoreline of five to four.

Shockers unfolded: Group C saw the Bulls from Audioslavia getting swept unceremoniously in a group that also featured Zwangzug, Banija and Ko-oren. Both Brenecia and Cassadaigua were dropped in Group B to Free Republics. The boys from Septentrionale got both 95X and Turori out on the World Cup dream. And then there was the Hinodejin Empire, technically the one team that, to make things interestingly, should've reached the knockouts. Their attempt of qualifying to the knockouts started poorly with a two-nil loss to the Starblaydi. Two draws (one with Valanora and one with Reçuecn) meant that the Hinodejin had reversed to a quality of football that was last displayed by the first Sunrisian team to ever qualify for a World Cup. Although that team managed to beat the Licentian Isles, at least.

In the stats, a name calls the attention and it's not really the top scorer of the tournament per se.

Against all odds (including literally not existing and being mostly a filler to the roster of 95X), the Isekai Bus of Fortune remains one of the most talented (and consistent) talents of the World Cup so far, going into the knockouts.

Of course, the Knockouts are only happening tomorrow, hopefully in about thirteen hours from this post. Make sure to be in the NS Sports Discord server to (hopefully, if my Internet connection allows it) the conclusion of this World Cup... in simulation form, at least.

by **Recuecn** » Sat Jun 20, 2020 8:25 pm

With four games left, Reçueçn had led a mostly successful qualifying campaign. The team had won more victories than in any preceding attempt, with only two losses—justifiable, they were to Brenecia and Quebec—and the two draws to Poafmersia. The ÉNRF was looking to seal its qualification soon, but instead of finishing strong it had began to limp towards the end of qualifiers.

The draw to Emastalia was unfortunate—they were a decent team, but Reçueçn was supposed to be better. The draw to Brenecia had been a good thing—Brenecia was supposed to be better than Reçueçn in turn—but given the context, Les Licornes really wanted a win. They'd been playing well, but now with only a couple games left, they still hadn't qualified, and Quebec was closing in behind them.

Tremblay had a press conference the morning of the game against Quebec. It would be a big game; with the only two teams in the group unassured of their qualification status clashing so close to the end of qualifiers, the game could be decisive. Yet as Tremblay tried to look ahead to the game to come, the reporters at the press conference kept bringing up past games and off-field drama.

"You've now played five games in a row where Reçueçn have only scored a single goal. Do you think you're hamstringing yourself by not starting your best striker?"

Tremblay sighed. "We've got a great team with wonderful depth. You're cherry-picking your results. The game before that, we scored three, without Franky. The game before that, with him on the field, we couldn't score all game. There's no causation here and your correlation is weak."

"Will you confirm that Franky Adams is facing disciplinary measures?"

"No, and I thought the fact that he wasn't was common knowledge. If it's not, at the risk of repeating myself, let me be clear: Franky Adams is facing no sanctions or disciplinary actions from the FNRF or any other organization."

"Then why isn't he starting any games?"

"The starting line-up for each game is decided on a case-by-case basis. I take into account who we're playing, how they've been playing, where we're playing, how the players are feeling physically, where they are mentally, and a host of other contextual factors."

"So which of those factors is responsible for Reçueçn's leading goalscorer being benched for six consecutive games during a tight qualification battle?"

Tremblay folded his arms. "I can't comment on that."

"Has the FNRF instructed you not to comment on what amounts to a suspension for Franky?"

"It's common practice not to reveal the decision-making behind choosing lineups before a game. We don't publicize our strategy."

"Rumor has it that there's a connection between Franky's stance on Cocoa-bo and his suspension. Is that accurate?"

Tremblay balked. "That's ridiculous! Suspended!?" He couldn't control the surprise in his voice, as if he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't have. "Franky's not suspended. Aah—anyway, as I said, I can't comment on that."

"So is Franky starting today?"

"The line-up announcement will be made before the game."

The reporters wouldn't give up. "What is your opinion on Cocoa-bo?"

"I don't drink a lot of sweet drinks," said Tremblay doggedly.

"What is your stance on the Cocoa-bo firm, and more specifically, allegations that they use their products to artificially enhance to performance of certain teams?"

"I haven't seen any evidence to support that theory," said Tremblay.

"How would you respond to a player who disagreed with you? Do you have any concerns about the integrity of the World Cup?"

"Please, we're getting off-topic. Does anyone have any more questions about the team or the game this evening?"

That evening, to the media's surprise, Franky was in fact among the starting eleven lineup for the Reçuecians. The reporter who had given Tremblay such a hard time certainly patted himself on the back, but in reality the coach's decision had nothing to do with the questions with which the reporter had annoyed him. The decision had much more to do with a conversation that had happened during practice later in the day.

Franky was jogging his warm-up lap, and he found himself next to Freeman Lebo and Emanuele Cutrona. Lebo looked over at him with a grin.

"You should consider drinking some Cocoa-bo before practice, Franky," he prodded. "If it's what you say it is, maybe you'd start playing better and coach would notice and put you on."

"Casse-toi," said Franky.

"Come on guys," said Emanuele. "This needs to stop."

"Get off your high horse," said Lebo. "You know this Cocoa-bo thing is a hoax. Yet you still stick up for Franky. You can't have it both ways."

"I'm not trying to stick up for him," said Emanuele. "I'm just trying to get you two to get along again."

"Like you're not a part of this," said Lebo.

"You two, me, the whole team. Whether this Cocoa-bo thing is real or not, we need to worry about ourselves first. And we can't play the way we need to if we're not co-operating."

"Right, coach." Franky rolled his eyes. "This is a big deal, and it bothers me that you refuse to see that. This world cup is about to be rigged, and you're ready to close your eyes, sit in a circle and hold hands."

"You're mixing metaphors," said Lebo.

Raoul Lavigne jogged up behind the trio. "Are you guys talking about Cocoa-bo again? Haven't you had enough of that?"

"That's what I'm saying," said Emanuele.

"Until there's clear evidence, you just need to accept that we're a team. We can worry about this after we've qualified."

"There is clear evidence!" exclaimed Franky. "Remember that game when Freeman drank a bunch of Cocoa-bo and got a hat trick?"

"That's anecdotal," said Emanuele.

"When I said that was me, not the Cocoa-bo, that wasn't some joke," said Franky. "I wasn't just boasting. If anything, drinking a whole liter of anything before each half was holding me back.

"I can't believe I'm suggesting this," said Raoul, "But maybe you should try it again?"

"Ugh, I'd rather not," said Lebo.

"Have Franky do it."

"Coach won't start me," said Franky.

"Maybe we could talk him into it," said Emanuele.

"I'd appreciate that," said Franky.

"Alright," said Raoul, "It's a plan." He slapped Franky and Lebo on the back. Franky began to smile for the first time in a while. Tremblay noticed the group from across the field.

Throughout practice he continued to keep an eye on them. For drills, they chose to work together, and they were still hanging out in a group, smiling, as they walked off the field after practice. Tremblay intercepted them, but Franky cut in before he could say anything.

"Coach, I need to talk to you," he said.

"I want to talk to you too," said Tremblay. "And you others as well. I've been thinking—"

Franky interrupted again. "Coach, I'm willing to drop this entire Cocoa-bo thing if you'll just let me play again. I realize it's been tearing up the team and it's time to stop that. I'm sorry it's taken me so long. Obviously I have selfish interests here because I just want to get on the field again, but I'm also being genuine. I shouldn't have divided us like that."

Tremblay smiled. "I've been watching you during practice, I was happy to see you all are working together again. But that's not enough, and fixing what you've done won't be easy. I want you to speak to the team, Franky. Explain, apologize, and get them come together again."

Franky hung his head. "Yes coach."

"Let's do that right now," said Tremblay. "And then I have some things I want to go over with you before you start tonight."

Franky looked up, a spark in his eyes. "You got it, coach. I won't let you down."

Franky was counting on Cocoa-bo to help him keep his promise. Before the game, as Lebo had, he quaffed two cans of it, and he did the same at half-time. And Reçueçn dominated. Quebec had been one of only two teams that had beaten them before, but this time they never stood a chance. Seventeen minutes in, Reçueçn had scored twice with goals from Lebo and Hippolyte Lavigne. A virtuosic goal from Hertel just before the break clawed back some of the deficit, but it would be nowhere near enough. Tremblay subbed on Quentin Gouin in the sixtieth minute and not too long later, Gouin showed he was meant to be there with a goal of his own. In the seventy-fifth minute, Tremblay put on Robert Chérau, and he did the same thing. Reçueçn was in the best form it had seen in months.

In all this, there was just one thing missing, or rather, one person. Franky stayed on the field the whole time, but he was invisible. It was if he was always a little out of place, a step out of sync, just a hair too far away from the ball to win the tackle or to get the pass. Lebo wanted to tease him about it during half-time, but he knew better than to rile up Franky. During the game, they had to stay focused. Yet it was clear that the Cocoa-bo was doing nothing.

Franky admitted as much after the game. "You're right, Freeman," he said. "I didn't feel any different at all."

"It take a big man to admit that." Lebo threw an arm around Franky's shoulders. "And don't worry about how you played tonight. You haven't played with us in months. You'll get it back."

"As long as I keep starting," said Franky.

Termblay overheard. Perhaps Franky intended him to.

"You will," said the coach. As long as you can work together with everyone, be part of the team, you can start. And as long as we can all do that, we can win more games like this."

"There's not too many games left," said Franky. "Just the one."

"But we're qualified now," said Tremblay. "We'll have more games to play—at the World Cup."

by **HUElavia** » Sun Jun 21, 2020 8:18 am

HUElavia Prepares for World Cup 85 after being Drawn in Group A!

HUElavia returns to the World Cup for their 2nd Appearance (and in Consecutive manner), this time being pinned in a fairly strong group. HUElavia (22) will be in Group A with the Co-host and reigning Champions Farfadillis (2), Turori (12), and Zwangzug (28). Notably, HUElavia, Farfadillis, and Zwangzug met each other in Group C of World Cup 84, which saw Los Amarillos/Os Amarelos defeat Farfadillis 4-3 and Zwangzug 1-0 in an eventual 3-Way tie at 6 points that saw HUElavia eliminated on Goal Difference (while Zwangzug got 0 Points).

This time around, based on the reseeding of the Groups, HUElavia was placed into A1, Zwangzug in A2, Turori in A3 and Farfadillis in A4. As a result, HUElavia will play all their matches in the capital city of Ferdullaele. The opening match for the HUElavians and of the World Cup will be against Farfadillis at La Fantás, which has a capacity of 70,000. Their next match would be against Zwangzug, which will also be played at La Fantás and the last group match will be against Turori in a La Snerra, which has a capacity of 100,000 (but only 20,000 is seated).

HUElavians have already brought their tickets to the country, and the opening match is expected to see about 40% of the crowd being HUElavian, who will take up an entire endzone at La Fantás. Tickets will be bought for the matches against Zwangzug and Turori in due time. The HUElavian Government has ordered HUElavians to exercise caution while in Farfadillis due to the chaotic nature of the country with its ethnic tensions, as well as the constant fires that break out. The National Team will be staying in a hotel close to an indoor facility where they can train without the risk of smelling fires or smoke in the air.

Back home, Fan Sites are being set up for public crowds to watch, while the Trading Card and Sticker Company Piccio is publishing once again the official sticker album of the World Cup, which includes all 17 venues between Farfadillis and Mriin, as well as the full 23-Team roster for all 32 teams, along with a Team Photo and a shiny sticker of the Team Logos. Fans are buying these albums and sticker packs in droves as an album in mint condition that is complete tends to be worth several hundreds of thousands of Hueks.

With regards to the team, Los Amarillos/Os Amarelos played 5 friendlies prior to their travel to the World Cup, playing 3 away games and 2 home games in Curumba. The three away wins saw HUElavia win 0-1 at Geektopis and Delaclava, and having a 0-0 draw with Busoga Islands. In Curumba, HUElavia won 2-0 against Sylestone (in Estadio Capital) and 2-1 against Twicetagram and JYPE (in Estadio Nacional). All players were used during these matches, which left the HUElavian crowd satisfied with the results and have optimism with the team. With the players, they all are excited and getting along, along with enjoying each other's company. Notably, it seems that the two star attackers Hamada and Navarro have gotten into a relationship while the same can be said with Ramirez and Duran, as well as Almeida and Acosta (Ah, such is Youth in Love). Coach Mendieta-Martinez and the HFA has notified these couples to keep their head in the game and try not to be distracted with each other during this tournament. The fans back home find it endearing that these 6 players have blossomed into a relationship, considering how often they see each other while being on the National Team.

Fans have optimism and confidence that the team can get at least a point, and they have good faith that the team can make some noise once again, and hopefully advance to the Round-of-16 this time around. Regardless of what happens, HUElavians and fans of the National Team will love and support the team through thick and thin.

FORCA HUELAVIA! VAMOS HUELAVIA! GO HUELAVIA!

by **Mriin** » Sun Jun 21, 2020 5:33 pm

Television sets were tuned and browsers were tuning in to catch the World Cup Finals draw, set to be held in the Mrii National League headquarters in Maal. But for those who turned in early, perhaps some having heard murmurings of a special pre-show, would find another scene entirely: a calmly crackling fireplace in the office of one Don Mizzet. A scroll mounted to the wall next to his fireplace listed off his various titles: Dean of External Affairs, Head of Medicinal Studies, Chair of the Board, Athletic Coordinator, Alumni Exemplar, Community Outreach Commander… then the scroll continued onto the floor at an unreadable angle.

With half an hour left until the main show, the camera pulled back to reveal a congregation around the magnificent mahogany desk: behind it the imposing dragon himself, and arrayed in front none other than the Independent Cocoa-bo Commission.

Sir Barsanuphius
Good morning. Welcome to the next sitting of the Independent Cocoa-bo Commission here at the University of Alchemy in Mriin. This is a special filmed session, on behalf of the request of our next interviewee, Don Mizzet, whose credentials were just on display.

Don Mizzet
Thank you for making the time to stop by, Sir Barsanuphius and the commission at large. I hold a great respect for the dedication to your cause and the manner in which you’ve carried out this investigation. But I must say that I’m very opposed to the original premise.

Sir Barsanuphius
That premise being the performance-enhancing nature of Cocoa-bo?

Don Mizzet
Yes; one thing not made explicit by my laundry list of titles is that I have spent centuries--of our ordinary-reality time--at the intersection between the pharmaceutical and beverage industries. And that means I have seen countless bogus health fads and snake oil salesmen pass through trying to pass their products off as having mystical curative or empowering properties.

Sir Barsanuphius
So you’re proposing that this is some sort of hoax, or scam?

Don Mizzet
Considering the circumstances, I’d lean more towards a hoax. While Cocoa-bo has seen a dramatic rise in sales this World Cup cycle, my contacts across AO haven’t been able to find a shred of evidence that these rumors began in the Cove. My best guess would be some dealer in an alley made the claim to a few gullible players and it snowballed from there.

Mr Minett
These theories are all well and good, Mr Mizzet, but you seem to be operating under the assumption that there Cocoa-bo is definitively a clean substance. Do you have any proof?

Don Mizzet
Well, I’m an alchemist by trade. Of course I ran some experiments in my personal lab and had several other renowned professors run their own. We couldn’t find a trace of any element that’s known to have performance enhancing effects on satyrs or humans.

Mr Minnet
Are those the only two species you tested for?

Don Mizzet
We did check for a few others--namely elves, of both Starblaydi and Vanorian varietals, Drawkians, and Equestrians. There’s far too many variables to account for otherwise so our efforts focused on those species that would be competing in the World Cup finals, with an eye towards allowing the MNL to make a decision regarding the topic.

Sir Barsanuphius
We shall take your results into account, though we have several other scientists and professors of the magical arts weighing in. But you spoke of a decision--has that been made?

Don Mizzet
It has! I’m pleased to announce that Cocoa-bo use will officially be sanctioned for teams competing in Mriin. There will be no punishment for its use, and retribution towards any players known to be ingesting Cocoa-bo is strictly prohibited. In addition, the MNL has worked with Starbex cafés and The Scoop ice cream parlors to produce a special run of Cocoa-bo based drinks and treats for the World Cup.

Mr Minnet
Say--aren’t those two businesses that you’re personally invested in?

Don Mizzet
I do have some pull on the boards for both, it’s true, but any of my colleagues on the MNL Council can assure you all our dealings were above-board and no favoritism was involved. It just so happened those were the businesses best prepared to handle an influx in distribution at the moment.

Senator Copronymuso
To wrap back to your studies--you didn’t happen to test the effects on puppies, did you?

Don MIzzet
I’m afraid we did not, Senator. But I did make an arrangement that will hopefully suit your tastes.

The sound of a door swinging open is heard, and entering stage left is Lux Vicelich carrying a teeny border collie pup. The scene fades out and is replaced with a short countdown to the start of the draw.

Maal Memoirs
Sports
The Grudge Draw

Yon Kegaant
Maal, Mriin

A momentous occasion, this was--the World Cup draw held on Mrii soil, going off without a hitch despite the best efforts of the FFFF. And around the groups there’s your usual litany of storylines, from the Farves pulling a carbon copy of last cycle’s group to the Vanorians and the Audioslavs getting ready to disembowel each other. But there’s a surprising number of throughlines for the Reavers, which is surprising considering their relatively short footballing history (in the grand scheme of things).

First up is the 4th seed, and our old enemies in Drawkland. It seems many in the Drawkian press have even forgotten our origin story, battling in the quarterfinals of Baptism of Fire 64 in Mercidini. They sent us packing before shortly being sent home themselves from the short-lived eventual champions Amnarei-asud. Then they went on to qualify that very same cycle. Overachieving bastards. Anyway we’ve shown them up since by continuing our qualifying streak long past theirs, and are hoping to bury this hatchet once and for all.

Then comes the third seed, Reçueçn. This is a team coming into this cycle most Mrii would be unfamiliar with beyond their early successes mirroring the meteoric rise of the Reavers and the Kick Corps. But the first of three friendlies the Reavers played this cycle--none of them wins, as per friendly tradition--was a loss away to the Reçeucians. And then of course there was the matter of the MNL repeatedly printing an embarrassing printing error throughout qualifying that corrupted Reçueçn’s cedillas; a mistake you know the FFFF never would have committed. It’s a newer beef, but that just makes it all the more fresh.

And finally, there’s Cassadaigua. It’s not quite getting boned out of the advantage of being placed in Pot 1--without that the Dagans would have “merely” been the top team of pot 2--but it’s still a very difficult draw on paper. Beyond that, the only bit of bad bloodis that the Dagans paired up with another of our rivals--the Bakers--to barely thwart the Pasarga/Mriin bid last cycle. Even that is largely assuaged by the fact that we won the rights this time around. As a result, I’d pin this opening day matchup as one of the best bets for a clean and high-quality football match this group stage.

by **Kita-Hinode** » Sun Jun 21, 2020 7:02 pm

Birds chirp, decent wind blasts warm my room as I wake up. Having spent two hours after midnight messing around with fictional rosters, I remember of my Magnum Opus (a team composed of players named after the biblical figure of Matthew, in one way or another) but with that, I also remember of my tasks for the day: namely the second day of the World Cup simulation.

After jogging for half an hour and cleaning my room, I boot up my notebook to find the initial reason for frustration. The infinite wisdom of Microsoft strikes with a mandatory ad for a new browser. It might promise performance advantages but its' disk occupation (thus preventing anything else from booting quickly) and the rather hamfisted way to introduce something that I already have a better option for results in some minutes of frustration.

That out of the way, I decided to go have lunch with my relatives in another room, the few that are living with me while the city ponders exactly how to descale their quarantine measures, even if there really isn't any reason to do it at the moment bar money. While that bit might sound depressing, having lunch with my relatives is a fine way to have a chat while munching onto some sliced sausages over pasta. Father never was a culinary genius but I'd rather not comment when my finest piece of kitchen craft was the time I had pasta, fish and Doritos in what I can only describe as two torturous hours in the bathroom returning said fish to the ocean via mouth-to-bucket-to-toilet.

Under the rather unusual temperature of thirty-one degrees Celsius in what is more or less Winter for this part of the globe, I started my stream. Amidst technical difficulties, I host three friendlies featuring teams that probably had actual rosters but are instead represented by some sort of joke squad, with the off-exception of 95X. Thanks to the efforts of cult player (for me, at least) Isekai Bus of Fortune, the people-of-the-Foureleven-land end up posting two goals over Jeruselem, with goalkeeper Mia Khalifa letting in more than she should've. That's nothing compared to the disastrous game Matt Stafford had, however, as Matthewsiania suffered against the inspired Vdara and their star player, one Freud Morelikis. Some, however, do blame the poor defensive efforts of Matthew of Edessa, even if Stafford should be used to the rather Lionesque, I mean crap, display. The battery of friendlies ends with the rather curious meeting of Xanneria (who benched the Roberto Moreno) losing to the elusive Michine.

Those games out of the way, the World Cup sim returned to action. And here comes what probably was one of the biggest problems of this idea: Sensible World of Soccer, for all of its' advantages, can generate some rather dull games. The Round of 16 saw four games go to penalties: Equestria eliminating Baker Park by 7-6 after a 1-1 score, Zwangzug pulling a notable surprise by eliminating the Nepharim threat with a 4-1 on penalties after drawing with the footballing force by two goals each. Starblaydia and Eura failed to score but the Eurans ended up getting the drop thanks to two caught penalties while the home of Di Bradini got four goals in, something similar for Farfadillis and Terre Septentrionale, although the team named only Septentrionale due to limitations of the system managed to score at least 3. Almost everything else was one-sided with Kelssek getting two on Huelavia, The Holy Empire only barely squeaking past the elves of Valanora with a single goal and the Free Republics more or less hammering the Drawks by three to nothing with only Banija and Vilita watching a rather back and forth game. Even that wasn't that much of a back-and-forth, to begin with, as the Vilitans qualified by scoring two over Banija's single goal.

With the Quarter-Finals already on, three teams were favoured by the two remaining watchers of the stream. The Holy Empire (sans armour), Zwangzug (sans poems) and Equestria (sans actual player names) all had their own advantages towards being declared champions of the simulation and while the round itself was still rather dull, all three made it through their opposition. Zwangzug got a goal on the Starblaydi, both The Holy Empire and Equestria ended up winning their games by two-nil over Kelssek and Farfadillis respectively while the real shocker of the tournament (and the one game we didn't really watch) ended up going to penalties as the Free Republics reached the semis of the tournament after an eventful two-two (that we didn't watch) and a penalty shootout that ended in three-two for the Theriault Boys (which we, again, didn't watch).

In the semis, it all felt like torture. Games of ten minutes chugged along like if they were thirty and at moments, the entire stream was silent as we watched a rather mediocre brand of football going on. Equestria (led by legends such as Cavalo de Fogo, Rumble Pony, Ponyta and Rapidash, accompanied by the managerial prowess of the legend himself, the chairman of the board Bojack Horseman) was actually my pick to go all the way. I mean, let's face it, the hilarity of a team with names that were made on the spot was promising enough. The ponies then curled onto a ball and let The Holy Empire trample them. Free Republics was also a name that could've been interesting enough, in actuality. People hated the team for quite a while (although not the folks in the stream, mind) but considering how the sim had been going so far, it wouldn't really be a shock. Zwangzug had to go to extra time to beat them but they did beat them.

Now, a final between Zwangzug and The Holy Empire was hardly a bad thing. Both are very respected contributors to the lore of the sport and you could say it'd be a pretty great final if this happened in a tournament per se. A clash of equals. A duel of talents. A game to remember.

One day, when I brought my brother from school, long before this state of affairs we live in but enough time after a proper RL World Cup, he asked me about the final between France and Croatia. Both sides had played each other in Moscow for, what to them was World Cup 21. Now, the entire tournament was debatable to me in terms of interest. Brazil had found new ways to undo themselves by having one of their players basically hand the game to Belgium, who themselves went to a game with a big head before being offed by the French. Japan found a way to qualify for the knockouts that had never really been used before, qualifying by the paper of a card instead of by the skin of their teeth. Games went to extra time often enough. And the final, pretty much a blow away game where the French dominated the rather thankful Croats, which as a game was deemed as "dull as hell" by my little brother.

Football can be pretty fun at times. And other times, you get Zwangzug beating The Holy Empire in the first half and then just running the score along.

With all due respect to Zwangzug but if this is the kind of football we'll look forward to, I'd rather go play hockey.

by **Free Republics** » Sun Jun 21, 2020 8:08 pm

Samuel Izmailov Rally
CoCoCo Stadium, New City, Orlandiana, Free Republics

Senator Izmailov entered the massive stadium in the heart of the most populated city in the Federation of Free Republics, constructed 4 years ago to host the World Cup 81 final, to deafening applause. There wasn't a single empty seat in the stadium even though none of the approximately 10,000 "Volunteer Militia for National Greatness" members in their blue shirts was sitting down. Numerous temporary seats had been added on the field allowing the 151,732 seat stadium to seat over 200,000 fanatical Izmailov supporters. Izmailov entered to a live musical performance by Lt. Herman Maslov of a new version of his song The Multiverse Needs Us (A Universal Force for Good).

I've heard it said that we should give peace a chance.
That we should just mind our own,
and let everything fall apart.
War is hell, they say
Its just not worth it.
Maybe so, but let me ask you this question:
What if The Multiverse needs us
to be that Universal Force for Good
that only we can be?

75 million people
Live in a Lawless Land
Forced to pretend
That their leader is legitimate
If they vote for the "wrong" man,
Its off with their head
And the Rigged Courts will Acquit
When a simple visit
From that Universal Force for Good
Will Free the People of that Land,
Can you really say
That we should Live and Let Live
and Live with Yourself?
If you're Honest with Yourself,
Even You must Admit
That The Multiverse Needs Us
to be that Universal Force for Good
that only we can be.

In many a nation,
Men live in fear.
Sherpa Cold Hysteria is on the rise.
Locking men into
Their Own Homes
and Twisting the Definition of safety
as a Weapon against Liberty.
The Tales of Businesses Destroyed
and of Kids robbed of their ability to play
Illustrate the Horror of their laws.
Declaring that Liberty is Not Liberty
Just because there's a virus going around.
But that's just the Tip of the Iceberg.
Your business is "not essential",
Or so they say.
And going to church,
That's reckless and dangerous.
This Stupidity knows no bounds
Even those Theocratic Fools
at Rushmore's North Pole
aren't as Deranged
as the Fearful hordes.
If Not the FFR,
Who will Free the Peoples of our Multiverse
From these Loony Fanatics?
That is why The Multiverse Needs Us
to be that Universal Force for Good
that only we can be.

Where ever They Cry Out
For somebody to step in
and Save Them from Themselves,
It is our duty to go.
Where ever Evil rears its Ugly Head,
We Must Be There
To Fight for What is Right.
There are so many people
Who Need our Help.
We mustn't turn our backs on them,
For if we do,
What shall they do?
Let there be no Doubt
That The Multiverse Needs Us
to be that Universal Force for Good
that only we can be.
That The Multiverse Needs Us
to be that Universal Force for Good
that only we can be.
And When Samuel Izmailov
Wins This Year's Consul Election,
We Shall Finally Be
That Universal Force for Good
That The Multiverse Needs Us
To be.

"Thank you, Lt. Maslow for the beautiful song. Where should I start tonight? First off, It's great to be back in New City before good people, decent people who want to live in a Great country again! We made it out of the first round of the election. Actually, we did better than that. We finished 1st out of all of the dozens of campaigns. When we started this journey many months ago, they said we were 'fringe' and that there was no way we were going to still be around after the first round. Well, we aren't just around after the first round. We won it and we're going to win the 2nd round and the 3rd round too!"

The crowd erupted into chants of "Izmailov". The Senator waited for the chants to die down and began speaking again.

"I say to all those who doubted us: We are going to win this election and we are going to Make the Federation Great Again! But we aren't going to stop there. We're going to Make the Multiverse Great Again by using the full power of our military to spread civilization to the barbarians. We say to the nations of the multiverse, 'Submit to the Will of the Indispensable Nation or We Will Make You Submit!' When we win, we will be done with negotiating. We will invade Equestria and put those talking animals in a zoo where they belong. We will invade South Covello to remove their impostor of a president and install a president fitting of the legacy of the late, great Carter Redwin. We will invade Sarzonia and every other nation that is run by pussycats that are terrified of a little bitty cold and we will forcibly reopen these nations and secure the freedom of their people to earn their livelihood and worship at their religious services. We will also restore the Republican economy to Greatness by creating 1 billion new jobs in 1 year.

I do have an announcement to make right now. Today, I spoke with Andrew Kasper of the Parent Rights Movement and congratulated him on his party earning representation in the Assembly. I also offered my support for his party's agenda. In return, I want to bring Mr. Kasper onto the stage right now. Come on down, Andrew!"

Andrew Kasper walked onto the stage.

"First of all, I want to thank you for coming here."

Kasper - You're welcome Senator. I've respected you for a long time. You're a man with integrity who is a true champion of the rights of parents to parent their children as they see fit. You have my full endorsement.

"Thank you Mr. Kasper. I hope to enjoy your support for many years to come. Now, let me move on to another matter. Specifically the Sherpa Cold. Many nations have been freaking out over the spread of this minor virus that poses no risk to anybody under the age of 80 or a weight of 300 pounds. Yet many scaredy cats have shut their countries down over it. Many cowardly losers run around in public with a mask over their face, probably committing crimes while pretending to be doing it to stay safe from the virus. When I am your consul, I will make it a criminal offense to wear a mask in public!"

This declaration got thunderous applause.

"According to the Lying Press, we supposedly had a record number of cases of this fake cold virus today. What we actually have is a pandemic of hypochondriacs who think they're dying because they caught a cold. While the majority of Republicans still have a brain, we have far too many people even in this country who got participation trophies for finishing last and thus can't even handle the slightest bit of adversity. We need to be a Federation of Warriors. That is why I am now unveiling my 'Invade the World, Invite the World' plan. Firstly, we are going to liberate every country in the multiverse and make it as Free and Great as we are. Secondly, we invite the best people of every nation to come to the Free Republics. If you can't find a job, we can and we will find you one because I will be the most pro-immigrant consul in the history of the Free Republics! However, if you come to the Free Republics, you MUST assimilate. If you come here and refuse to adopt our values then don't ask us for any help."

The crowd cheered again. Some held up "Immigrants for Izmailov" signs.

"Speaking of jobs, I will be creating 1 billion new jobs in my first year as your consul. I will do this by expanding our military and by providing businesses with resources to hire more workers. Should any business owner refuse to operate their business, the government will operate it for them. Should any workers refuse to work, we will send in replacement workers and those lazy bums can sit at home making 0 thalers! With me as your consul, you will have the Right to Work. I will put an end to the recent growth in idleness and I will Make Our Economy Great Again!"

Yet more applause. As he paused, somebody came up to Senator Izmailov and informed him that the frivolous lawsuit in South Covello had been dismissed.

"I have just been informed that the frivolous lawsuit of Jonathan Lee Moneybags vs. Samuel Izmailov and Maria Polus has been dismissed by a judge in the anarchic hellhole of South Covello. I'm surprised they even have courts in that country but it is the correct decision. I have also been informed that this insane person who launched a lawsuit against me where he alleged that I had him run over with every tank in our Army, among other claims fitting of a Rugs Rabbit cartoon, has been ordered to pay a fine for 'wasting the court's time' though it appears unlikely that their joke of a court will be able to collect anything as Mr. Moneybags is an unemployed bum. Yes, in South Covello, some loser who is too lazy to get a job can launch frivolous lawsuits and the government does absolutely nothing because they can't send anybody to jail for refusing to pay their fines! This is yet another reason why we need to prioritize the invasion of South Covello because the people of that long suffering land deserve an actual government not a crazy person pretending to be a god or pure unadulterated anarchy."

The rally continued for a while longer as Izmailov rambled on and on about many different things including his media coverage. He also repeated his old attacks on Sister Polus. He did mention the National Soccer Team briefly:

"Tomorrow, my nephew Maxim will once again be playing in the World Cup representing our Great Federation. I have great respect for Soccer General Theriault and the success he's had as a coach. While he's supporting another campaign at this moment, I hope he will be willing to support us should his preferred candidate not make it to the final round. Something many of you may not know that I just heard from our Soccer General a few hours ago is that he has decided to go with the players that brought him to the World Cup instead of revamping the defense. During the break, the defenders on the team trained extensively and Soccer General Theriault expects them to be at the top of their game when the World Cup begins."

After rambling a bit longer, Izmailov moved to the finish of his rally.

"We will Make Republica Strong Again. We will Make Republica Rich Again. We will Make Republica's Navy Dominant Again. And yes, We Will Make Republica Great Again. Thank you."

As Izmailov finished, an assassin rushed him and fired a gun at the Senator. The bullet narrowly missed the Senator because he was tackled by one of his aides and not a moment too soon. Fortunately for the guy who attempted the assassination, the New City Police Department got to him before the Blueshirts did so he was hauled off to jail to face attempted assassination charges instead of being killed on the spot...

World Cup 81/82/83/84

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: contact Sasha Henderson, FAC Director of Media Relations for further info.

World Cup 85 Notebook

Baker's (half) Dozen: World Cup 85, co-hosted by Farfadillis & Mriin, will mark the Commonwealth's sixth consecutive appearance in the Finals. Although it appeared that there were a few contenders capable of breaking into the club, BP remain the only nation with an active streak of qualifying for every WCF they've entered. Special mention should be given to Hampton Island, who qualified for the first time on just their second attempt.

Speaking of streaks: The National Team set a torrid pace during qualifying, going unbeaten in the first 17 matches of the competition—including the pre-tournament friendlies, the streak was 23 in a row, an all time record—with a 12 match winning streak included. With only a single loss—2-1 to The Macabees at BBP Stadium on matchday 18—and three draws, the side earned 63 out of the 72 points available, an 87% success rate.

Caps to fit all sizes: Fifty eight players made at least one start during the 24 matches in Group 5, an impressive display of the depth of talent the Commonwealth can call upon for international competitions. In addition, there were numerous milestones reached by veteran players, as no fewer than nine regulars reached the 50 cap plateau at various points, and several others celebrated reaching goalscoring feats.

We meet again: The National Team have previously faced off against both the first two Group G opponents; Terre Septentrionale visited the Prince William Stadium in Newmarket in one of the final tune up matches ahead of World Cup 84, coming out with a 1-1 draw; Siovanija & Teusland have a more recent experience with the BP side, as they hosted Ichi Tuzzio's squad in Borograd at the Olimpski-Stadion, a 5-2 win for the visitors. This will mark the fifth meeting between the nations who made their NSWC debut together in Baptism of Fire 67, with the Goldhorns' only win coming in the group stage of AOCAF LX, 1-0 in Puerto Farolero, Farfadillis.
The only opponent the Commonwealth have never met is Eura, ranked #3 in the world, and always one of the favorites among bookmakers to win the World Cup. In a quirk of the draw for the Finals, Terre Septentrionale & Eura will face each other for the third time in the competition on matchday 2, as they both advanced out of Qualifying Group 3.

Nice threads: Baker Park went back to the uniform design they wore during their first World Cup qualifying success, and they will stick with the same motif. The gold shirts with black shoulders & sleeves, and black shorts has been one of the most iconic kits in NT history. The squad elected to have a small patch sewn onto the left sleeve to pay tribute to Frank Armitage, the retiring Daily Mail writer who has covered the sport for nearly 30 years. The FAC wish Frank & his wife Laura all the best in the future and we thank him for the coverage he's provided to our teams.

Captain Chaos?: Derick Briggs & Tracey Vasillias continue as co-captains of the National Team, but in a departure from previous cycles, 10 others have worn the armband during the qualifying matches. The starting lineup on matchday 1 will be the most experienced international side ever fielded in BP's 72 year, 622 match history.

_______________________________________________________________________________________

FINALS ROSTER

1   Caroline Gordon		33	Brentford Ladies FC		
23  Danielle Gaines		29	Castleford FC			
21  Grant Coffey		25	Hamilton Wanderers FC		


19  Sarah Foreman		33	Leichardt FC (NPH)		
22  Emily Arnold		32	Hamilton Wanderers Ladies FC	
4   Tracy Vasillias		32	Middletown City Women FC	
3   Derick Briggs		32	Shirley Metros FC		
5   JC Bartok			28	MTK Kingsville (DAR)		
2   Terrence Stephens		29	Asbury Park FC			

6  Daisy Callum		        31	Southern Star FC (BRE)		
18 Nicki Stone			23	Riverside City Ladies FC		
13 Annabeth Westmoreland	28	Hondo FC (VAL)			
15 Amanda Hayes		        31	Crusaders FC			
7  Maria Fernandez		27	Newmarket Ladies FC		
8  Jamari Bozeman		29	Southend AC			
16 Lorenzo Taborn		29	MTK Kingsville (DAR)		
20 Antonio Sotolongo		28	Learfield FC			
11 Junior Ngoba		        24	Hamilton Wanderers FC		

12 Missy Tilton			29	SK Leiderkranz Ladies		
14 Lainey Wadsworth		24	Anomalies FC (CMT)		
24 DeAngelo Simmons		25	Monmouth Park FC		
10 Tyrek Jones			27	St Warren City FC		
9  Sabrina Patton		32	Chenoworth Rovers FC (NPH)	
17 Jessica LeClair		28	WEA (EUR)

Starting XI vs Terre Septentrionale: (3-4-1-2)
Gordon; Briggs (C), Vasillias, Stephens; Callum, Westmoreland, Taborn, Fernandez: Bozeman; Simmons, Patton
top Subs: Bartok, Hayes, Sotolongo, Jones, LeClair

_________________________________________________________________________________________
© Sporting Times Weekend 2020
National Team cool, confident in approach in Mriin
by Mindy Cartwright, National Soccer Editor

There's been a subtle, but noticeable change in the overall mood of the Commonwealth National Team over the past several months; on reconsideration, 'demeanor' is probably the more accurate description, as the squad still exhibit the close-knit, one big happy clan feeling.

There were the tears and emotional scenes near the end of the qualifying process when many of the men and women who had performed exceptionally during the tournament knew their time was up for this cycle; some veterans sensed this might be their last hurrah, while some of the up & coming youngsters knew that the others ahead of them on the depth chart had paid their dues and waited their turn in the past.

But even as far back as the mid qualifying break, the international weeks, with the camps that preceded the matches, seemed to shift in the way the players and the coaching staff approached the daily preparations.

Now decamped at their training base, at the facilities provided by Reyn Wanderers, there is an air of confidence among the squad, in a way that's much more noticeable than previously under Trevor Richmond and Pam Scott. It's almost as if NT manager Ichi Tuzzio has cast a spell on the players to increase their self-belief heading into the Finals.

"Mr T. has talked to us a bit about how compared to the Farves, we're so much more deferential, how we don't appreciate our real potential and ability," said Sabrina Patton, who compares her experiences playing for the NT and how different the mentality at her Nepharim club is.

"At (Chenoworth) Harriers, even though we had been relegated the season before, we always went out with an attitude that we so much better than the other side we were playing. We've had plenty of opponents here (in international play) since I've been in the team that we knew weren't anywhere near us talent wise. But now we've started to take a different approach by adopting the thinking that, yes, we respect our opponents as sportsmen & women, but we have more skill, ability and a stronger will than they do and it's up to us to go out and show that for 90 minutes."

by **Starblaydia** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 6:24 am

Qas is the Magic Number, Evidently
Starblaydia to face Qasden in group opener for a third consecutive tournament

The schedule for the Group Stage of the 85th World Cup has been released and, wouldn't you know it, there's a very familiar fixture for Starblaydia. The opening Group H game for Ázëwyn Fëanáro's team as they push to be crowned Champions will be against Qasden.

Just like it was in the 84th World Cup, in the Commonwealth of Baker Park.

Just like it was in the 83rd World Cup, in Banija.

Statisticians look out, because for the third World Cup in a row, not only will Starblaydia play Qasden in the Group Stage but, almost unbelievably, they'll meet on Matchday One. The only twist in the tale here is that, this time, Starblaydia will be listed as the 'home' side, whereas before this honour has fallen to the team from Qasden.

It's a quirk of the random draw, brought about by being in separate pots, that the two sides have been drawn in the same Group for three Cups in a row, but familiar faces will meet once again in the tunnel, and walk out of the 55,000 seater Iron Alley stadium in Hosingr, Mriin to kick off their Finals charge. Indeed, Starblaydia will play all three Group games in the Al Hosingr stadium, but the spartan facilities won't dampen their fervour to support their team all the way to the Knockouts and beyond.

Fellow Atlantian Oceanians, Qasden have played Starblaydia three times at senior level. Once in the disastrous 53rd AOCAF Cup, resulting in a 2-1 defeat for the team in white and purple, necessitating the installation of Fëanáro as head coach and Starblaydia's subsequent rise back into the top ten in the world rankings over the past eight editions. After two meetings in Under-21 World Cups, the 42nd and 45th Di Bradini Cups, it was straight into the 83rd, 84th and now 85th World Cups. Starblaydia hold the edge in their meetings with Qasden, just, and given the current disparity in rankings - Qasden coming in at the bottom of Pot 3 - one would expect this to be a win for Starblaydia to kick off their tournament in the right fashion.

Hampton Island have never faced Starblaydia before in international competition and, coming in at 58th in the world, are the lowest-ranked team to have made it to the finals. Concentrating as they do on other sports, it's actually a fantastic achievement for the aging veterans that make up the Hampton Island's squad, many of them probably struggling with hip and knee replacements, as well as fading eyesight. Starblaydia's players, ranked more than 50 places above them in the KPBs, should be able to routinely dispatch this side. If not, much more dangerous things are afoot than three points dropped.

Brenecia, clad in their rather stylish ediraf kits, were crowned champions just five tournaments ago (as you might remember this actually took place in Starblaydia, which is probably where you recognise the dark blue kits from) and represent Starblaydia's toughest hurdle to the knockouts. Coming in at a 12th-place ranking in the KPBs, the two sides have met just twice in their history, during the Qualifiers for World Cup 73 in Apox and Stvoto Latoli. Each side holds a 1-0 away victory over the other, making this entirely not a rubber match, with little to no historical needle in the game whatsoever. Currently, the only link between the two sides is Northern Union attacking midfielder Calindra Apelles, who will face her Brenecian teammates in the form of 'keeper Cass Farrell, with Garrett Horgan and Tricia Pace likely to start on the bench.

by **Nephara** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 6:35 am

Simpralia 0 - 4 Nephara
(4-4-2) 20 - Provost; 2 - Stride, 22 - Lockheed, 6 - Brosch (vc), 3 - Close (c, 19 - Muscadin 76'); 13 - Saroszi (7 - Kuepper 70'), 15 - Kastriot, 21 - Moxham, 16 - Deventer; 17 - Avetisyan, 10 - Metzger (23 - Lovelace 70')
Goals: Brosch 16', Avetisyan 21', Deventer 33', Kuepper 86'

There were two main issues hovering overhead in the Nepharan camp.
The first issue: pretty big! Being a first seed in theory meant cruising through an army of incompetent losers who barely knew what a football was. Here it meant Audioslavia and Valanora. The three of them together looked like a fitting top three, not a group. Even NFX, tempting as it was to dismiss them as the spare, had some pedigree.
Natasha Sutter, a slightly plump, fresh-faced young blonde who had a title like 'player liaison initiative agent synthesiser' that she was never entirely able to remember, was discovering the second now.
"And you didn't think to tell us?" she hissed at the pleasantly blank satyr behind the counter.
"I understand your concern, but believe me, dragons are not an uncommon sight here. While they may lair as they please, they do remain subject to the laws of the land--"
"Oh, oh, what? You're gonna just, what, watch on as that scaly megafauna bastard eats our fucking wizard and, and, fucking handcuff it?" A Bachelors in Communications hadn't fucking prepared her for this. "That's great, that is--"
"Thank you."
"-- yeah, that's problem solving. Ahh, fuck it. What do I expect you to do? Go shoo it off? Nah, I know you aren't paid enough for that..."
The satyr smiled pleasantly at her. Sutter made an unpleasant throaty sound and went off to tell the others.
"Hey, lads, bad news; Scaly's here to stay."
Vivica Muscadin perked up, and started to volunteer a fact. "You know there's a subgenre of artists on the internet called 'scalies' who--"
"Anyway apart from that it's all apparently set. You can take your rooms, same as they were last international window. Except Morena, you're swapping back in with Marcin. Nobody else can take the fucking incense, love."
Morena Deventer smiled with all her teeth.
"Now," said Sutter briskly, "I'll want all of you on what passes for your best behaviour. The people are satyrs, not goats or whatever cool racism you decide to come up with. The ones that aren't satyrs are humans - you know, they'll look like fucking people, you get it - or... you know, or very plainly other things. Keep it down, try not to get lathered every night, try not to disgrace your country. Don't want any arrests like... like, fuck, you all remember what happened to Sander last time--"
"I don't!" chirped Aranea Provost, the baby of the squad. "Do tell."
"-- we all remember what happened but the scars are too deep to dredge up and tell anyone who wasn't there, got that?"
"I'll tell you after, Nea," said the ever-helpful Aristide Metzger. Provost clapped excitedly, drowning out Sutter's attempts to clear her throat loud enough to take control of the situation.
"So-- so! So. Point is, there's--" She leafed through a few pages of her tablet, and gave up. "Look, just don't make tits of yourselves, right?"

Five minutes later, Valeri Longship was sighing. "I cannot stress how bad the aunt analogy is to use here, Yana..."
"Well... yeah, but you take my point, right?" For a typically burly centre-half, Ilyana Brosch had a decidely fey way of movement, and was currently finding ways to flit around someone she towered over. "It's fine that it isn't for long. That means that it's better, we don't have time to get tired of each other... just some level of physical consolation and then it's off home to her wife and my feeling sorry for myself." Her tone dropped. "Oh, shit."
"What?"
"Marica's here with her opinions--"
Marica Kuepper arrived with her opinions. "I can tell from the way that you stopped talking and started whispering that you want me to join in."
"Uh--"
"Well, good." The winger clapped Brosch's shoulder and began to speak with the absolute confidence of someone who has had one bad thing happen and wants everyone to know about it. "Take it from me, Yana, you don't want a permanent connection here at this stage of your career."
Brosch tried to smile back or something. "I mean, it doesn't have to be permanent. Just someone to keep the fires warm."
"Oh, you want that? Hire a maid. Trust me, Brendan? Fucking Brendan? Couldn't run the bloody bath, let alone the household. Honestly, the man was just a collection of big talk and high ideas, all tip, no iceberg. And you know what? I'm over him, Yana! I'm finally over him. I'm so--"
"Uh-huh."
"-- so over him that I could just, just, every time I bring him up? Could be the last, Yana. So over it. But, you know, I could see how others might, you know, not be so able to move on. You know, when a man stabs you through the goddamn heart like that--"
"Marica!" Konrad Lovelace exploded into the conversation, grabbed the wiry winger by the shoulder and shoved a smartphone in her face. "Found another of those lizard videos you like."
"What the f-- aw, isn't he darling?"
Lovelace pressed the phone into her hands, slipped an arm around Brosch's shoulders and gently but firmly guided her to safety, back to where Longship was waiting. The fullback glanced up over her glossy magazine. "Oh, you survived."
"Don't have to sound so delighted," griped Brosch, flopping down on the couch.
Lovelace was right there beside her. "Yeah, look, shut up. I saved you for a reason. You can eavesdrop, Valeri. So there's a word that... I mean, you haven't seen Ro Thorn yet, right? She'd normally be right out here with the gang."
"Did you just call us a 'the gang'?" said Longship, incredulous.
"I... mean, yeah, I guess."
"No, it's just, makes us sound like some kind of weird children's show guys. The main cadre. Who do or stop crimes or whatever. Carry on."
"Yeah, great, Val, anyway, she's writing a book. Apparently some idea of the skipper's."
Brosch cocked her head. "What, like memoirs?"
Lovelace shook his head. "More like... well, kinda," he conceded. "But the way I heard it from Acatha, and you know she's not just gonna gossip for the sake of it, is that it's like some... some passion project. Of her experiences here."
Brosch blinked. "That's just memoirs, Konrad. Anyway, this is the first I've heard of it."
"Really?" Lovelace frowned. "Figured you'd maybe have more insight, 'cause--"
"Well, you might have done, but, I don't."
Longship was the more incredulous, though. She peered back over her magazine, furrowed her brows. "... Can she even read, though?"

Roxelana Thorn rubbed her eyes. She was here to kick people. She'd always been good at kicking people. She'd been so damn good at kicking people that she'd had to escape all careers involving writing, but got, apparently, so damn good at kicking people that that'd somehow underflowed and the task of writing was squarely back on her shoulders again.
God had a sense of humour.
Close had told her that she shouldn't start yet, 'cause the Annals were after all the captain's burden - as if this was some big tradition and not something he'd made up - but then he'd told her that actually he reckoned she should start yet, and as soon as possible, on account of, uhh, well, to get her eye in. She didn't get it. This was stupid. But she'd do it anyway because she was dutiful and patriotic and such and they could probably comprise the body of her memoirs if she needed a quick buck down the line.
The Book of Thorn., she wrote. The Book of Thorn itself was something she'd found here, actually. In some New Age place. Nice, thick, dark leather bindings. It looked a little cursed, and the guy had talked like it was a little cursed, but you know, that's the kind of showmanship she admired.
It had been a nice little jaunt to take her mind off what everyone else's was on; the group draw, one whch had royally shafted the Cormorants. Valanora and Audioslavia? Seriously? But it had ruffled Thorn less than it had the other. Come to think of it, that was probably why she was captain, wasn't it...
After some thought, she began;
This is our year.

by **Hampton Island** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 7:44 am

(Team prepares for their first World Cup practice in Dockside, Mriin)

Edwin Conney: Never did I imagine that we would be here in the World Cup. I would always watch it on television but the thought never went through my head that I could actually play in it. I am sure it is the same way for all of you.

Clyde Benner: It’s incredible to be here. It is also great to see how much our country is getting into it. People are actually researching our playing careers now.

Edwin Conney: When are you going to make your coming out of retirement announcement?

Clyde Benner: Once we’re done here.

Roger Grant: Good morning, gentlemen. They have some weird looking people in Mriin.

Edwin Conney: They call them satyrs. Very interesting.

Hank Andrews: You guys seen a dragon yet?

Clyde Benner: Yes and it spooked the hell out of me.

Edwin Conney: The satyrs are actually very nice. I was able to talk to a couple of them right after we landed here. I am going to have to come out here on a vacation separately once this is done.

Hannah Sanders: Hello guys, sorry I am a little late. I saw a dragon and had to run and hide before someone told me it was normal here and not to worry.

Hank Andrews: You guys are lucky, I have not seen a dragon yet.

Roger Grant: Hello, Hannah.

Clyde Benner: So coach, I think we all want to know what went on with your meeting with the jerk in Stafford City and the status of everything behind the scenes.

Hannah Sanders: It actually went quite well. He is excited that we are in the World Cup. He forgot that he had a bonus in my initial contract giving me $5,000,000 if we made the World Cup. I had to point that out to him, so that was a little contentious. But he is making a lot of money otherwise, and realizes that we are good for his bottom line, so he is not going to keep up from getting what we need out here.

Edwin Conney: That is good, what about bonuses for us?

Hannah Sanders: I didn’t see any, unfortunately. But I believe that we will be able to get you some through our sponsors, so that will be something that I will work on.

Clyde Benner: Just come out of retirement like me, Edwin, and you won’t need a bonus. I have teams calling me now to the point where I am thinking about rehiring my agent.

Roger Grant: I had a couple teams call me too. I think because you said you would come out of retirement if we qualified that teams are trying to get all of us.

Edwin Conney: I have had four inquiries. Declined all of them. I am enjoying my time right now, but I simply enjoy being retired and want to stay that way.

Hannah Sanders: Well, I have picked up a lot of footage of the Brenecia side for us to review. I know you have all started checking out their squad.

Clyde Benner: I remember watching Brenecia win the World Cup. I was actually rooting for them in that final pretty hard at a pub in Ellicott City.

Roger Grant: They made the semifinals last time and finished third, right?

Hank Andrews: That was Nephara.

Roger Grant: Oh. Right, right. Sorry.

Edwin Conney: Just have fun out there. Do what you can to win at all costs, but remember, no one expects us to do anything. There is no pressure out here.

Hannah Sanders: Exactly, have fun and savor it. And realize how much you have done for our sport back home.

by **Cassadaigua** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 10:05 am

World Cup Time,
by Chelsea Dufresne, Concord Heights Times

After a record breaking period of qualifying for the team, amassing a stunning 103 goals in 24 games, the Fillies are set to begin World Cup 85. I am tempted to just jump right in about our group draw, so I will do that because things have set up pretty interestingly for the team. Team Cassadaigua will meet the host nation, Mriin, in matchday one of qualifiers in Kapytaal. The interesting part of this matchup is it could be seen as an “unofficial handover” if you will, from World Cup 84 to World Cup 85. Of course, World Cup 84 ended in Concord Heights, Cassadaigua. Now, World Cup 85 begins afresh with Cassadaigua meeting Mriin, the nation that will eventually host the championship game. The backstory should be exciting for both nations. Other groupmates are Reçueçn and Drawkland. I will talk more about them when the time comes, but certainly those are two very capable nations. Reçueçn caught everyone’s attention when they advanced to the round of 16 of World Cup 83 in their first ever qualifying attempt, before their fairy tale ride was eventually ended by our very Fillies. Drawkland is known more for its prowess in sports like football (or gridiron, as you may call it) and basketball, but they have been able to be a respectable force in soccer as well, even if they have been in the Cup of Harmony the last couple times.

A lot of Cassadagan fans have made the trip here to Mriin, and while it might have been tougher for them to grab tickets for the opener, it is good to see this level of support. At the team hotel, Cassadagan team members rented out the meeting room to have an evening long autograph session for fans, something that lasted for the first couple days here. The intensity of practices are picking up now so the autograph sessions have ended, but it is good to see that there is plenty to do for the fans. Vendors will show off their crafts, and there is plenty of food to eat (stay away from the fried food areas, a piece of advice that I was given by an editor), but if you want, just relax and spend time at the beach. The locals here have been very welcoming up to this point, and I expect that will continue. When the Fillies do play Mriin, it will be the first ever meeting between the sides at this level. Note that Cassadaigua is officially a pot 2 team and Mriin a pot 1 team, but this is only true because the hosts are drawn into the first pot. If that was not the case, this still would have been a 1 vs 2 matchup, but with those roles reversed.

As for the other opponents, the only history Cassadaigua has with Reçueçn is the 1-0 win in the round of 16 during World Cup 83. That result gave Cassadagan fans a lot of immediate respect for that nation, and they spoke highly of that team after that game. Still, we are sure that they will remember that result and look to avenge it! Interestingly, Cassadaigua is 0-0-3 lifetime against Drawkland, being outscored 6-1 by them over that period. Those games were played when we were just beginning our new ascent up the rankings so we have reason to be optimistic that we can change that trend. Cassadaigua has a good history against the Drawks in other sports, and recently eliminated them on their home planet turf in the first round of the World Baseball Classic playoffs. When the time comes, that history, coupled with the 0-0-3 record in soccer should provide plenty of additional inspiration for this team to get a win at this level in this sport.

Now then, we have to back track a little bit and tie up loose ends on that amazing qualifying period that saw the team score 103 goals. It is amazing to even think about scoring that many, especially since we are not a team that is as aggressive on offense as they probably could be. What it really meant was the team was finishing their opportunities when they came about, and when that happens one of the first places you can look is in the midfield. That is where these chances are generated, and the veteran play of Sierra Mattison coupled with the amazing tournament that Meghan Wolcott has had, are what really stand out. Zack Pierce has also been great, and thanks to all of this, the opportunities for Rachel Schanke and Eddie Malone up front have been plentiful. Also, regular substitute Ashley Dahlin, I would imagine, scored more goals then the leading scorers on several teams from qualifying. Meghan Wolcott told me recently that, “I believe we are the best team in this tournament. We have a lot of unfinished business from our short period of life in Cassadaigua last time out, and I know that it showed during the qualifiers. I am very confident going into the World Cup that we are in sync, and going to continue to assert ourselves well in the Cup. I can’t wait!”

Below, is the final goal scoring break down of the team from qualifying. Since the team officially clinched with three games to spare, there were more opportunities for more players, and it was good to see even them make the most of the chances they had. Here is the list:

Rachel Schanke- 23
Meghan Wolcott- 17
Eddie Malone- 13
Ashley Dahlin- 12
Zack Pierce- 11
Sierra Mattison- 9
Madison McClain- 5
Preston Newfeld- 4
Shelby Martin- 3
Lupe Enriquez- 1
Emma McKee- 1
Kimberly Carson- 1
Brooke Sutter- 1
Loreen Hazen- 1
Courtney Graham- 1

The appealing thing about this list is the diversity of the goal scorers. Schanke and Wolcott probably could have had a few more each if they were not rested as much down the stretch after the team qualified. That is also true for Eddie Malone. On the flip side, Ashley Dahlin made the most of extra playing time in the games after qualification to fall just one goal shy of Malone, overall. That should not be interpreted as the team having made the wrong decision to play Eddie over Ashley. When Ashley has been in, she has been the go-to player. When Eddie is in, the go-to player is typically Schanke. Sierra Mattison’s effectiveness is never measured in goals scored, since she is a vital player with expertise in the delivery of corners. She has always been a great player for the team, but this has been her best campaign as an individual.

The biggest problem this team faces is that “don’t peak too early” concern. We know that they have been great, but the biggest games are still to come. This is a veteran team, so I am not concerned about that being an issue as they should all be able to adjust. We can and should be excited about our chances during this World Cup. Having said that, many teams are also saying the same thing and have good reason for it. When you are one of the favorites, as we are, it can be easy to focus too much on your team to not enjoy the tournament overall. The World Cup is the greatest sports tournament of all. We enjoyed it on home turf last time, now, we can enjoy it from home on our devices, as the greatest players in the World try to make their nation proud.

by **Siovanija and Teusland** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 10:57 am

12:00 PM - Nationalstadion, Stelburg

The press room was filled at the Nationalstadion, as people across the country eagerly anticipated the announcement of the Goldhorns’ squad for World Cup 85. Gavin Hughes took the podium, flanked by the captain, Raphael Klopfer, and the man who has been the face of the national team for its entire existence, Thorsten Kramer.

Two years since the first World Cup squad announcement, there were certainly more questions this time around. Who would be the third striker behind Michael Ribbeck and Krasimir Kynev? You could make arguments for any of Ludwig Reichwein, Stanimir Ilev and Johannes Mandl - although Mandl’s case had become much stronger with his Golden Boot winning campaign in the Republikaliga. How many centre backs to take? Would Ivo Romanov get the call for what would likely be his final shot at the World Cup? And, with younger players like Leopold Bliznakov, Julian Werner and Kurt Witzel all performing well in Qualifiers - who would be selected to backup Viktor Dimitrov, and thus be appointed the heir to his #10 throne. Hughes began to speak.

“Welcome everybody. First of all, I’d just like to say, to the 36 players who played a part in our Qualification campaign - thank you. If I could take all of you, I would, and you each had a key part to play in our success. You can take pride in what you’ve accomplished in your country’s colours, and we look forward to having you again in the future.” Hughes paused now. “Starting with the goalkeepers. Ewald Heuser, Yanko Zhelyaskov and Anatoli Sveteikov.”

No surprises there - Heuser certainly the #1, as one of the world’s top young keepers looks to continue his great career to date. “In defence, we’re taking Edgar Steimle, Axel Richter, Raphael Klopfer, who will be our captain, Karl-Heinz Jager, Erich Thierse, Darijen Vesele and Pierre-Louis Lotbiniere.” No real hard decisions on that one. Each of these names had been excellent in Qualifying - Darijen Vesele a real break-out star for the team. Then, of course, there was Karl-Heinz Jager, a leader on this team and one of its finest players. The Goldhorns were in solid hands.

“In midfield, we’re taking Thorsten Kramer, who will serve as vice-captain, Todor Mihailov, Dennis Brotzmann, Heinrich Bahr, Viktor Dimitrov and Leopold Bliznakov.” Murmurs throughout the assembled journalists in the room. Obviously, the choices of Kramer, Mihailov and Dimitrov were expected. Some had wondered in Dennis Brotzmann might be left out as he aged, but Hughes has liked to use him as the defensive option in the past. Heinrich Bahr was impressive in Qualifiers, and backed it up with a great domestic season to ensure his place in the squad. The interesting pick was Bliznakov - clearly a great player in his own right, and he’d had a great deal of success for his club Zvezda Vlaikograd in the Republikaliga. Clearly, Hughes also liked his performances with the national team, and it’s a big rise in stock for him.

“On the wing, we’ll have Mario Kogler, Lojze Kokalj, Lukas Tauscher and Ivo Romanov.” No real surprises here. Kogler was the natural pick on left wing, such a dynamic player, and Lojze Kokalj’s impact over the course of Qualifiers had made him the only real choice as back-up. Lukas Tauscher, of course, was the best choice on the right side. Some had advocated for Sinisa Gaspersie to be selected over Ivo Romanov, given the Zvezda winger’s success for his club, but Romanov proved in Qualifers and for Olympia Borograd that despite age, he’s not ready to slow down just yet.

“Up front, we’ve got Michael Ribbeck, Krasimir Kynev and Johannes Mandl.” 11 goals in 10 appearances for Ribbeck in Qualifying, he’s by far the leading candidate for that #9 shirt and is a dynamic forward for the Goldhorns. Krasimir Kynev returned to the squad after a great campaign for him as well, 6 goals in 7 appearances, and a brilliant season with Olympia Borograd. Finally, it was impossible to overlook Johannes Mandl, who scored 30 goals in the Republikaliga in addition to 7 goals in 7 Qualifying appearances.

After the announcement, there were a few quick questions directed at Raphael Klopfer and Thorsten Kramer on the World Cup draw.

“Thorsten, you’re going up against world #3 Eura in the opening match - is it good to get what will certainly be the most difficult match of the group stage out of the way on the first day?”

“I think it could be a benefit, for sure - both teams will still be settling into the tournament, and so we’re looking to come out flying and get as much as we possibly can from this one. Every match is going to be difficult, though, and we’re looking forward to the challenge.”

“Raphael, it’s then a reunion with Baker Park on matchday 2 - two teams who will always be linked to that Quarterfinal of Baptism of Fire 67, where their international journeys began. You just faced Baker Park in the AOCAF last summer, however, beating them 1-0 in the group stage- can you take confidence from that result?”

“Certainly, yeah. We know Baker Park are a great team, and we’re certainly not going in thinking that we’ll win because we did last time. But it is something that we can point to in preparation, and look at what we did well.”

“Finally, Thorsten, you’ll face Terre Septentrionale on matchday 3 - the pot 4 team in the group. What’s the thinking going into that one?”

“Obviously we’re hoping to be in with a shout on the final day, and that will make it an interesting match. We’re not going to take them lightly, though - we were the pot 4 team last time around, and we were able to get some results of our own, and so we’re going to be absolutely focused for that one.”

“Raphael, as the captain, how confident are you that this squad can put in a great performance here at the World Cup?”

“I’m very confident, obviously - we had such a great run through Qualifying, particularly against the top teams, and we’ve got a friendly coming up against Banija, one of the best sides in the world right now - we’re doing everything we can to prepare for this and come in as strong as we can.”

After the quick press conference, the media headed down to the Nationalstadion, where all 23 members of the World Cup squad prepared for the team photo on the pitch. Wearing dark suits with the STFA logo embroidered on, as well as the traditional national hat, they finished up the last bit of PR before preparing to jet off to Hosingr, Mriin, to kick off World Cup 85.

Borograd, Siovanija

Chancellor Dominik Meier re-read his letter again. It was an important moment for the leader, politically - the National Democratic Union had remained stable in the polls, despite the Banija-Farfadillis nuclear incident that the government had been involved with. Domestically, President Fleiss’ address to the people had been praised, and the joint investigation gave the people confidence that answers would come.

In the Parliament, however, the opposition parties were attacking the Meier government, calling for more to be done, and calling for increased nuclear safety standards at home. The government had already announced an aid package for Farfadillis, which had silenced some criticism. And so, when a press release from the Euran Minister of Foreign Affairs, Mr. Ian Smith crossed Meier’s desk, he felt it was a great opportunity for a reply to actually take real action on nuclear security. Feeling content with the letter, he sent it off to Bastion.

To: Mr. Ian Smith, Minister of Foreign Affairs for the United Federation of Eura
From: Mr. Dominik Meier, Chancellor of the United Republics of Siovanija & Teusland
Classification: Most Secret

Dear Mr. Smith,

I felt it important to write to you after reviewing your press statement on the recent nuclear incidents that have so greatly affected the world in the last few weeks.

The United Republics of Siovanija & Teusland, naturally, share the concerns of your government regarding these cases. We ourselves possess nuclear weapons, and so it is something we take very seriously. Having nuclear power is a responsibility, and our government treats that responsibility with the utmost care.

This is why the Banija-Farfadillis incident has been at the forefront of our national attention ever since it began. We enjoy a strong relationship with the Kingdom of Banija, and consider them to be a strong ally. We have also begun work to provide aid to the people of Farfadillis, and our positioning in southwestern Atlantian Oceania makes us well-suited to assist in any way we can.

Due to the military alliance we share with Banija, and the assistance provided by our state to their nuclear weapons program, we are naturally deeply involved in the post-incident workings. The Armed Forces of the United Republics will be assisting the decommissioning of the remaining Banijan nuclear weapons. In addition, our military intelligence services are involved in a joint investigation with their Banijan counterparts on this subject.

Of course, we accept the idea of a neutral, international investigation on this subject. We believe that the creation of a temporary organization which could oversee the investigation and allow all interested countries, of which there are surely many around the world, to verify the results, would be the best way to go about this. Naturally, as we are already participating in the joint investigation with Banija, the United Republics would not be a part of the international inquiry - but it certainly has our full support and cooperation.

We believe, however, that this provides an opportunity for all nations committed to nuclear safety. The world has seen two major nuclear incidents in recent times, and there is currently no worldwide body committed to nuclear safety. Given that the framework for such an organization will be present with the international investigation into the Banija-Farfadillis incident, we believe this is the perfect time for the creation of such an organization. The United Republics would greatly support such an organization, which would be committed to monitoring events such as these.

We are interested to know the opinion of your government regarding these ideas, and are looking forward to closer cooperation between our states on this matter.

Sincerely,
Chancellor Dominik Meier
National Chancellery Building, 1 Milan-Dimitrov-Square, Borograd, Siovanija & Teusland

Siovanija & Teusland 1-0 Ethane, @ Nationalstadion, Stelburg

Starting XI: Heuser; L. Dimitrov (Steimle 60’), Thierse, Jager, Vesele; Bahr (Brotzmann 80’), Kramer, Witzel; Kogler, Tauscher, Reichwein (Ribbeck 60’)
Goals: Michael Ribbeck 75’
Man of the Match: Michael Ribbeck

Banija 2-3 Siovanija & Teusland, @ Wolf’s Den, Banija

Starting XI: Heuser; Steimle, Klopfer, Jager, Vesele; Mihailov, Kramer, V. Dimitrov; Kokalj, Tauscher, Ribbeck
Goals: Lukas Tauscher 24’, Karl-Heinz Jager 50’, Michael Ribbeck 81’
Man of the Match: Lukas Tauscher

by **HUElavia** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 12:14 pm

HUElavia-Farfadillis Cold Intro

Four Years have passed since the spectacular tournament that was World Cup 84 in Baker Park and Cassadaigua. Football shined throughout that tournament, with entertaining games being played. In the end, Farfadillis, with the great performances by Êns and Holsteiner helped to bring the AO Nation win their first World Cup against overwhelming favorites Vilita.

Now, the hosts have changed hands, and now two nations welcome the Multiverse to the World Cup: Farfadillis and Mriin. 17 venues between the two nations will give host to the best teams of the Multiverse. Today, 32 destinies converge together as only one will come out on top as World Champions.

Tonight's Opening Match is one of significant note. Farfadillis, 2nd in the Rankings, comes in not just as a co-host, but as reigning champions. These champions are looking to prove that their victory in Cassadaigua was no fluke. Filled with talented players, making anything less than a deep run will be unacceptable for the millions of Farves supporting the team, especially in a very charged up environment. On the other side of the pitch stands HUElavia. A nation that seems to have hit their stride and come in with a talented and young squad filled with the best male and female players the nation has to offer. They look to repeat their upset victories in World Cup 84, but this time to make it past the Group Stage and hopefully to a Cinderella run.

These two nations meet each other four years later, in what a few minutes separated HUElavia making their 1st knockout appearance in their Maiden Voyage of the World Cup while Farfadillis was nearly eliminated and erasing their chance to win their 1st World Cup title, which ended 4-3. Tonight is a match of vengeance for two different reasons on both sides of the pitch.

Regardless, may the multiverse enjoy the tournament that awaits us. Tonight begins a tournament filled with joy, insanity, wonder, agony, and passion.

Match 1.

Game 1.

HUElavia-Farfadillis

by **Turori** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 12:19 pm

Eel's Bend but don't quite break in 2nd half of Qualifying

Eels Park, Eelandii, Turori :: On the strength of goals from Nua'oma Aikiki, Daliora Toru'u and Meldi'ita Mungwaii, the Turori National Team emphatically marked the conclusion of the first half of qualification for World Cup 85. Over the first twelve matches of the campaign, Turori had lost none, drawn none and averaged less than one goal per game conceded. For a team looking to make amends for an early exit during World Cup 84, they could not imagine a more perfect start to the 85th World Cup cycle. There were minimal changes to the roster from the previous cycle as the Football Association of Turori doubled down in its so-called golden generation to see if they could push once more for that elusive first World Cup Title with the Finals being played on Atlantian Oceania soil.

 Turori 3 - 1 Necosia	
	Goals:	:: 4' Nua'oma Aikiki:: 16' Daliora Toru'u:: 63' Meldi'ita Mungwaii            
	Team:	Timaala Hualtia, Mikki Mayelli, Yitizo Mpala'a, Amakli Inuro'o, Moumouni Verre'elali, Kentu Umaka'a, Mbdiai Akarenaa, Daliora Toru'u (Lati'ala Giaoka 69'), Nubara Moafalia, Nua'oma Aikiki (Kala'a Yuliizala 45'), Meldi'ita Mungwaii (Wiztsana Iretziia 74')

Turori were one of just two teams to complete the first half of World Cup 85 Qualifying with a perfect record, the other being another Atlantian Oceania regional rival in Banija who led Group 6 with a similar 12-0-0 record. During the first half of the campaign, Turori's National Citizen Squad made nine appearances including a grueling stretch of five consecutive games in the middle of the campaign where the Eels outscored their opponents 20-3. Wiyauw An'maude started each of those five games for Turori although Timaala Hualtia started three of the other four matches for the citizen squad during the campaign. With a fourteen point advantage over Audioslavia, the only team considered serious contenders for Turori's spot atop Group 1, there was little thought at this stage about whether the Turori National Team would be advancing to the World Cup, the only real conversations being had would be focused on how many records they could break during the grueling 24 race stretch. One of the first that would come up for the bidding would be the classic 14-0-0. Considered the 'perfect record' by many traditional Vilitan Cove based sides, neither Vilita nor Turori had ever reached the elusive mark. Now, with a record of 12-0-0, the Turori National Team was just two wins away from becoming the first VIlitan Cove area side to do it.

 Turori 1 - 1 Astograth	
	Goals:	:: 77' Nubara Moafalia              
	Team:	Timaala Hualtia, Biliki Rona'atu'i, Lulu Pumaziiri (Nubara Moafalia 61'), Amakli Inuro'o, Yitizo Mpala'a, Daliora Toru'u, Timi'sala Koarena (Kiidallen Aeroluzzi 45'), Kentu Umaka'a, Mbdiai Akarenaa, Meldi'ita Mungwaii, Nua'oma Aikiki (Wiztsana Iretziia 78')

It would all go away at the Grand Duke's Stadium in Astograth, however. The hosts, a Pot 10 seed ranked just 244th in the world produced a spirited display and even led for a short period in the second half. Nubara Moafalia quickly restored Turori's pride scoring a goal to level the match but the Eel's could not find the winner to keep their perfect record alive, dropping their first points of the campaign to an unlikely foe in Astograth. Despite the minor set back, the Football Association of Turori would continue with plans to divide the remaining World Cup Qualifying matches up between the Citizen Squad and the Cocoabo Squad. The Cocoabo had already contested three matches over the first half of qualifying with a perfect 3-0 record and would extend their streak on Turori's 14th matchday with a 3-1 victory over Muradil.

 Turori 0 - 0 Audioslavia	
	Goals:	               
	Team:	Timaala Hualtia, Amakli Inuro'o, Yitizo Mpala'a, Tarek Edgeli (Lati'ala Giaoka 45'), Lulu Pumaziiri (Naraiza Ruaplal 45'), Daliora Toru'u, Mbdiai Akarenaa, Nubara Moafalia (Mikki Mayelli 45'), Kentu Umaka'a, Wiztsana Iretziia, Nua'oma Aikiki

In their first match after dropping their first points of the campaign, Turori's National Citizen Squad was off to Audioslavia. The pressure of facing the Bulls was considerably reduced on account of Turori's large advantage atop the Group 1 table as well as through the fact that Turori's National Cocoabo Squad has managed to defeat Audioslavia, appearing to lift the Turorian curse that had followed every match ever played between the two sides prior, all of which had been won by Audioslavia. With a chance to solidify the end of the dark age of Audioslavic Opposition, however, Turori's National Citizen Squad slipped up and failed to find the back of the net, held to a goalless draw by the team would would ultimately finish World Cup Qualifying with the best defensive record among all participating teams. The result would also give the Bulls optimism heading into the remainder of the schedule that maybe there was a chance to catch Turori later on down the road..

While the Citizen Squad had now dropped points in two consecutive matches, the Cocoabo Squad kept on trucking with a 2-1 victory over the Euran Oceania Territories to extend their perfect record to five games.

 Turori 1 - 0 Porticalia	
	Goals:	:: 1' Mbdiai Akarenaa              
	Team:	Wiyauw An'maude, Amakli Inuro'o, Mikki Mayelli (Tarek Edgeli 45'), Yitizo Mpala'a, Lulu Pumaziiri (Kiidallen Aeroluzzi 45'), Nubara Moafalia, Mbdiai Akarenaa, Kentu Umaka'a, Daliora Toru'u, Nua'oma Aikiki (Meldi'ita Mungwaii 45'), Mirana Gotuai

The Citizen Squad would hit the road one more time to face off against Porticalia before taking a break from the trail. It looked like a rout might be in store on the day when Mbdiai Akarenaa found the back of the net less than a minute into the game. It was not to be the case, however, as Akarenaa's early goal would end up the only one of the match. While it wasn't one for stat-padding it was still three crucial points allowing the Turori National Team to maintain the gap at the top of the table as they approached the mark where they could clinch qualification through to the World Cup Finals.

With the Citizen Squad taking a break, however, the responsibility for securing qualification to the World Cup Finals would fall on Turori's National Cocoabo Squad. The Cocoabo would receive the reigns with Turori hanging on to an 11 point lead atop the Group 1 table and 16 points clear of the third place sides, Astograth and Sajnur. With 24 points left to fight for if the Cocoabo could secure three more victories there would be no way for the Eels to be caught and their place in the World Cup Finals would be secured.

Their first game back would be against Sajnur in what was a partial '6 pointer' in terms of defending their spot in the Finals and the Cocoabo would not disappoint. While it was a hard fought match, Turori's National Cocoabo Squad was able to hang on for a 5-3 victory to move one step closer to the Finals.

The Cocoabo hit the road for the first time on the schedule making a first ever trip to Jeckland with the possibility of securing a place in the World Cup Finals with a win. It was an uncharacteristic match for the usually attack leaning Cocoabo Squad who could not break through the Jeck Defense, ending the perfect record that had amassed up to that point in the campaign. The Cocoabo's own stalwart defense, however, did preserve a goalless draw as well as both Turori and the Cocoabo's unbeaten run extending the streak to 19 games from the start of World Cup 85 Qualifying.

Turori were now just one point from securing a spot at the World Cup 85 Finals in Farfadillis and Mriin and the stadium at Iobabao Legendary Field was packed for the occasion. Home of one of the great Turorian clubs, Mliona-Lpaka, a club sponsored by Cocoa-bo, there were distractions outside the stadium amidst the so-called Cocoa-bo inquisition. Some nonsensical signs outside the arena seemed conflicted between being Anti-Cocoa-bo, Anti-Cocoabo, Anti-Cocoa-bo and Pro-Cocoabo at the same time and even one clearly misplaced sign that seemed to be protesting against Krytenian sportswear company JMC.

While it was clear there was at least one Audioslav fan in attendance looking to will Turori to another defeat, the majority of those in attendance were still rooting for the Turori National Team to be victorious over a Natanians and Nosts side that had not sent any media to the match. It is possible that the citizens back in Natanians and Nosts are still unaware of the heartbreak they left behind in Mliona-Lpaka, defeating the Cocoabo Squad 2-0 and denying the Turori National Team the chance to secure advancement to the World Cup 85 finals in front of their home fans.

 Turori 1 - 0 Villablanca	
	Goals:	:: 44' Lulu Pumaziiri              
	Team:	Timaala Hualtia, Yitizo Mpala'a (Lati'ala Giaoka 18'), Amakli Inuro'o, Lulu Pumaziiri (Tarek Edgeli 62'), Mikki Mayelli, Mbdiai Akarenaa, Daliora Toru'u, Kentu Umaka'a, Nubara Moafalia (Mirana Gotuai 45'), Meldi'ita Mungwaii, Nua'oma Aikiki

 Turori 1 - 2 TJUN-ia	
	Goals:	:: 43' Mbdiai Akarenaa              
	Team:	Timaala Hualtia (Wiyauw An'maude 64'), Lulu Pumaziiri, Yitizo Mpala'a, Amakli Inuro'o, Mikki Mayelli, Mbdiai Akarenaa, Nubara Moafalia, Daliora Toru'u, Kentu Umaka'a (Turakia Diijelhma 69'), Meldi'ita Mungwaii (Kiidallen Aeroluzzi 69'), Wiztsana Iretziia

With three games yet to play, it was highly likely that the Turori National Team would find the point they needed to secure advancement at some point along the way. However, the loss of a chance to finish one of the longest qualification campaigns in their history with an unbeaten record was a matter of pride that had been taken away by the most unexpected of opponents at the beaks of the Cocoabo Squad. The Citizen's break was immediately cancelled and they were sent on the road to Villablanca to finish the job. And finish the job they would. Lulu Pumaziiri's goal just before half time was all Turori needed to collect all three points on the day and secure their place in Farfadillis and Mriin. Turori's National Citizen Squad returned home to Eel's Park in Eelandii to contest the second leg of the two game haul against lowly TJUN-ia - the team with the most draws in all of the World Cup 85 Qualification Cycle. Despite being 9th in the Group 1 table TJUN-ia actually came into the match with an even goal differential and were joint third in the group for goals scored behind only Turori and 4th place team New Lusitania.

While fans left greetings and support for Turori's National Citizen Squad as they now shifted their focus to the World Cup Finals, their opponents were still fighting for much more. A top-half finish in Group 1 was still possible for the TJUN-ians and they could still even out their record to have just as many wins as defeats during the World Cup 85 Qualification cycle. To do so, however, they would have to defeat the groups Top Side, Turori. While Turori had comfortably defeated TJUN-ia by a 5-1 scoreline away from home, even having time for one of Turori's National Team players to film a commercial for the Vilita & Turori based Dart Group who has started selling in the TJUN-ia market, the return fixture in Eelandii would be a much different story. While Turori had put a few fresh names into their lineup having already secured qualification, TJUN-ia's Jaguars came out highly motivated and got the opening goal in the 32nd minute from Kepo Ulawaya. Mbdiai Akarenaa leveled the scores for Turori just before the half much to the relief of the home fans but it would be a false hope in the end.

TJUN-ia would find their winner just minutes into the second half from Joe Green then instantly transformed into a brick wall that Turori was unable to penetrate despite a relentless 40 minute assault on Gylfisson and the entire Turorian back line. When the final whistle blew, the Citizen Squad had been handed their first defeat of the campaign, falling apart in front of their home fans while the TJUN-ia players celebrated the greatest victory in the history of their national team.

 Turori 3 - 0 Necosia	
	Goals:	:: 44' Nua'oma Aikiki:: 53' Meldi'ita Mungwaii:: 56' Wiztsana Iretziia            
	Team:	Mitimi Obalialo, Yitizo Mpala'a, Tarek Edgeli (Mikki Mayelli 45'), Biliki Rona'atu'i (Mbdiai Akarenaa 64'), Amakli Inuro'o, Daliora Toru'u, Nubara Moafalia, Lati'ala Giaoka, Kentu Umaka'a (Wiztsana Iretziia 45'), Meldi'ita Mungwaii, Nua'oma Aikiki

Following the defeat, Turori's National Citizen Squad would stick around in Eelandii to study film and prepare for the final match of Qualification against Necosia while the Cocoabo Squad would be sent on the last away day of the campaign to New Lusitania. The Lusitanian's were still mathematically in the hunt for the second Group 1 qualification spot though they would need to be perfect with Two Victories of their own and Two defeats for Audioslavia.

They would get the victory they needed over a Cocoabo Squad that seemed overburdened from the multi-regional travel they had undertook in the second half of the campaign while Turori suffered its third defeat in four matches to somehow fall into the clutches of a surging Audioslavia side that had not yet been mathematically eliminated from finishing atop Group 1. While it would have no effect on advancement to the World Cup Finals, finishing atop the Group was a matter of pride for the Turorians. Especially doing so ahead of Audioslavia. While the Cocoabo Squad had the honor of defeating Audioslavia on the pitch, the Citizens were held to a goalless draw by the Audioslavia side that had conceded just 8 times over 23 games thus far. They did not want to give up this last victory to the Bulls.

With that driving motivation, the Citizen Squad put together their most inspired performance of the entire second half of qualifications putting together a dominant 3-0 victory to condemn Necosia to last place in the Group at the same time they finally secured their own place as Group 1 Winners. After nearly throwing away the entire cycle over the second half of qualifiers, the final matchday victory was an important confidence boost for the entire Citizen Squad as they move on to the World Cup Finals.

by **Terre Septentrionale** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 12:29 pm

World Cup 85 preview

Vidial, Mriin - The World Cup 85 is starting soon, Terre Septentrionale is in group G with all games being played in Vidial, Mriin. Terre Septentrionale starts their journey against Baker Park in a stadium called "The Pub". It will be the 2nd time these two teams faces each other, the Nordiques visited Baker Park for a friendly last year, which ended with a 1-1 draw. On matchday 2, Terre Septentrionale will play against Eura for the 3rd time in this World Cup. On matchday 9, Eura beat the Reprezentacja Nordycki 3-1 and they beat us again on matchday 22, 2-0 this time. On the final matchday, Terre Septentrionale will play against Siovanija And Teusland. Then, the Northmen will go back home to watch the World Bowl because it would be very surprising to see Terre Septentrionale advancing to the playoffs. This is for real, it's not a video game and we must admit we have no chance against Baker Park, Eura and S&T. Terre Septentrional has announced instead of staying in a large hotel in Vidial, the team will stay in a cosy and charming hotel in Seastone and travel to Vidial by train every matchday. Assistant coach Orlikowska told us they decided so for two reasons: "first the time we'll spend on the train is good for team spirit and, secondly, we want to avoid taverns and pubs the most as possible because they're too tempting for our players. We hope Seastone don't have many taverns but honestly we don't know because we never been there."

Here is the complete schedule for group G.

Matchday 1

Baker Park vs Terre Septentrionale @ The Pub
Siovanija And Teusland vs Eura @ Gold Field

Matchday 2

Terre Septentrionale vs Eura @ Gold Field
Baker Park vs Siovanija And Teusland @ Flâneur

Matchday 3

Siovanija And Teusland vs Terre Septentrionale @ The Pub
Eura vs Baker Park @ Flâneur

Zvonimir Kordic inserted in the roster

Coach Wyrzykowski has announced Jaroslaw Sobieszczyk is released from the team and he will be replaced with 22 years old Zvonimir Kordic. Kordic played well during the Tournoi des Patriotes, a domestic tournament held simultaneously with the World Cup qualifications, and helped his township to make it to the semi final. He scored 4 of Dalmatia's 7 goals in the tournament, including 2 goals in the semi finals that they lost 3-2. On another hand, Sobieszczyk's career is on the decline and is a fringe national team player with no cap with the team and he subbed in only once in his career, it happened in these qualifications on matchday 10 against Northwest Kalactin. Zvonimir Kordic will wear the number 13, the same number he wears with Lokomotiva Kukljica, his club team. Kordic has the potential to eventually be on the starting XI or at least fight with McCracken for a spot in it. The official roster have been reprinted and redistributed accordingly with the new change.

OOC: I have decided to make this change before seeing Kita-Hinode's RP about his video game.

Leading goascorers during the qualifications (excluding friendlies)

Player	               Goals
Fryderyka Cwierczakiewiczowa	11
Sandrine Fontaine	11
Sandie McCracken 	7
Roksana Kolodziejczyk	7
Élisabeth Normandin	5
Wlodzimierz Waclawczyk 	4
Yannick Ksiezniakiewicz	2
Kévin Maillé-Chicoine	2
Amelia Zalwowska 	1
Slawomir Skrzeszewski 	1

by **Alasdair I Frosticus** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 1:38 pm

OOC- some shameless plagiarism here from Lovecraft

Independent Cocoa-bo Commission
Transcript of Next Session

Sir Barsanuphius
Good Afternoon. Welcome to this special sitting of the Independent Cocoa-bo Commission here in a hut in the middle of the Szoirsian desert. Forgive the unusual location, but as we gear up for the Empire's opening match against Kelssek here in Szoirsia, we're a little more restricted than usual in terms of travel. We have at least asked the local authorities to provide us with a couple of ceiling fans and a supply of water. Joining us this afternoon is Russ Howard, former team captain of the Sarzonia Stars. Now, Mr Howard - I believe you're appearing as a hostile witness.

Mr Howard
Yes, that's correct.

Sir Barsanuphius
Could you clarify on what basis? We've always taken care to represent a range of opinions during this commission.

Mr Howard
What, by accusing some Cocoa-bo-smeared lunatic in a turnip field in Electrum of being a puppy murderer? Well, that went well, didn't it?

Sir Barsanuphius
No; there was the interview in Mriin just yesterday....

Mr Howard
Spare me; the evidence - such as it is - has clearly been weighted against Cocoa-bo. And what did we expect from a commission led by someone who once said 'I shall not rest through World Cup 85 until my prejudices are confirmed, regardless of the actual evidence, and this dangerous substance is banned across the multiverse'. How even-handed is that? This whole commission is nothing more than a farce. And the only real impact has been to send Cocoa-bo sales through the roof across the multiverse; ironic, no?

Mr Minett
Regardless of Sir Barsanuphius's feelings on this matter, Mr Howard, he has taken great care to make sure the other members of the commission are independent.

Mr Howard
'Independent'? Who's paying your way, Mr Minett?

Mr Minett
I've received no financial renumeration for sitting on this commission. I deeply resent the implication...

Mr Howard
Maybe not, but someone's funding it, aren't they? I mean, the Holy Empire may exist beyond time and space, but they haven't traditionally been very good with this money thing, have they?

Senator Copronymuso
Money? I have heard of this primitive concept; do you think...

Mr Howard
As to the senator here, if she's one of the wisest minds in the Holy Empire, then God help Ordinary Reality the next time you decide to 'save' us from some existential threat. Just what is it with this puppy obsession anyway?

Senator Copronymuso
Do you really want to know?

Mr Howard
Surprise me.

Senator Copronymuso
<The senator stands; the sky turns black; her face is illuminated as if by an eldritch light; her voice is laden with doom>

The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the mundy mind to correlate all its contents. You live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of the infinity, and it was not meant that you should voyage far. Your sciences, each straining in its own direction, have hitherto harmed you little; but some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of your frightful position therein, that you shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the light into the peace and safety of a new dark age. What do you know of the world and the multiverse about you? Your means of receiving impressions are absurdly few, and your notions of surrounding objects infinitely narrow. You see things only as you are constructed to see them, and can gain no idea of their absolute nature. With five feeble senses you pretend to comprehend the boundlessly complex cosmos, yet other beings with wider, stronger, or different range of senses might not only see very differently the things you see, but might see and study whole worlds of matter, energy, and life which lie close at hand yet can never be detected with the senses you have. Mundies' respect for the imponderables varies according to their mental constitution and environment. Through certain modes of thought and training it can be elevated tremendously, but there is always a limit. Yet puppies know the gate. Puppies are the gate. Puppies are the key and guardian of the gate. Past, present, future, all are one in puppies. Puppies alone know where the Oneiromancer broke through of old, and where He shall break through again. They know where He once trod the multiverse's fields, and where He come to tread them, and why none of you can behold Him as He treads.

<the senator sits down again; the mood immediately returns to normal; she picks up a puppy and strokes it>

So yes, puppies!

Mr Howard
<clearly shaken>

I.... I didn't know.... Forgive me.

Senator Copronymuso
Not that they have much to do with Cocoa-bo mind; but when it comes to protecting you cute little mundies from that which no longer lives, but can never really die... Don't underestimate the value of puppies.

Sir Barsanuphius
Do you have any further points you wish to make before the commission, Mr Howard?

Mr Howard
I HAVE HEARD THE HOWLING OF THE VOID!
That is not dead which can eternal lie - and with strange aeons even death may die!

Mr Minett
Is he.... alright?

Sir Barsanuphius
Oh, he'll get over it; probably. I very much doubt there's any permanent damage.

Anyway, we have two remaining witnesses over the coming days - a senior executive from Turori company Inura Extracts, and Holy Empire scientist Igor von Madscientisto. We look forward to their testimony and hope their participation will resolve the key issues once and for all.

by **Sarzonia** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 2:07 pm

As much as he wanted this trip to Farfadillis to be a pleasure trip away from the various trials and tribulations of national leaders, this trip to watch the Sarzonian national football team compete in the World Cup proper for the first time in 28 competitions was now taking a turn for the worse for President Grant Haffner.

Almost no sooner than first lady Gloria Haffner put her suitcase down than the "bat phone" began to ring. Grant Haffner looked at the caller ID and saw it was Senior Vice President for Defence John Newman.

"What is it?" the Sarzonian head of state and de jure head of government answered sharply. He was aware of a general threat made by some senator from Free Republics against Equestria, but other than his decision to cancel a planned state visit and increase the Sarzonian threat level to blue, essentially activating the Ready Reserves in the Incorporated Sarzonian Navy and beginning to mobilise the Home Guard for more frequent drills, there wasn't much going on.

"Did you see what Samuel Izmailov said in his latest speech?"

Haffner sat up bolt upright as soon as he heard the name of the Free Republics senator and now-known provocateur.

"No," he said. His eyes, which had rolled with the ringing of the emergency cell phone were now wide and glowering.

"I just sent you the video," Newman said.

Haffner watched the video, highlighting the section which specifically mentioned Sarzonia.

We will invade Sarzonia and every other nation that is run by pussycats that are terrified of a little bitty cold and we will forcibly reopen these nations and secure the freedom of their people to earn their livelihood and worship at their religious services.

"What do we do about this, Mr. President?"

"For starters, formally activate the reserves, the Home Guard, the Ready Reserves, and initiate the recall of all emergency personnel. Step up our readiness to Condition Yellow. [OOC: Sarzonia's colour-coded readiness conditions are essentially the same as the former U.S. colour-coded terror alert system except it adds condition purple as being a step beyond red.]

"In addition, I will transmit a request to Parliament to request that the ISN step up its patrols of the region including sending four task forces to international waters near Free Republics." Haffner then submitted the request through maximum encryption to House Speaker Samantha Raymond [Progressive-Endymion]. She texted back, "I don't know if you're going to get the votes for a pre-emptive strike."

"I'm not looking for that," Haffner texted back. "What I'm looking to accomplish is to make sure Izmailov and any other cranks who think like him reconsider before they threaten us."

"And if this escalates into full-scale war?"

Haffner paused for a moment with his thumbs poised over the keys on his phone. He didn't want war. In fact, he took great pains, as did former President Jay Tyler, to pull Sarzonia away from the gunboat diplomacy that was late founding President Mike Sarzo's calling card. He knew if Sarzo were not only alive, but calling the shots, that the country would already be at Condition Orange. If Izmailov were President, he likely would have authorised a first strike on Republica with an enormous barrage of conventional weapons.

Haffner didn't want a war, but if he had to prepare for one, he would ensure that Sarzonia would fight as fiercely as ever.

"I don't want war, but if we have to fight, we're going to make that motherfucker pay."

"Think about the millions of lives you would be risking to 'make that motherfucker pay,' Raymond texted back. "That's the sort of cavalier attitude that we could have impeached Sarzo over."

In this era, Haffner thought. He remembered how Sarzonia was far more aggressive in its foreign policy, and how that led to a fray in relations with Pacitalia. Hell, it even led to tensions with Praetonia, one of Sarzonia's most ardent military allies. He'd presided over a country that saw a clear shifting of its Overton window away from Sarzonia's hawkish nature of the past, but he wanted to send a reminder that this Sarzonia would still not be a pushover. He sent the video to Raymond. He heard an audible gasp.

"I'll get the votes," Raymond texted back. The message from Senate President Darryl Horton (Moderate-Woodstock) was the same. The vote came back after the Haffners quickly finished their room service meal. The joint resolution authorised increasing patrols throughout Atlantian Oceania and Task Forces Whisky, Tango, Alpha, and Foxtrot were all mobilised and instructed to set off for international waters near Free Republics.

Task Force Foxtrot included two amphibious assault ships, the ISS Carolina and the ISS Hastings and the battleship ISS Antietam, along with the SSBN ISS Furious.

The mobilization would mark the nearest Sarzonia came to war in well over a decade. It also included the External Affairs Department ordering any Sarzonian nationals in Free Republics territory to leave within 48 hours. Any Free Republics citizens in Sarzonian territory were also ordered to leave within 48 hours.

Sarzonia didn't want a war, but if she had to fight one, there would be hell to pay.

by **Kelssek** » Mon Jun 22, 2020 3:07 pm

A rectangle of short-clipped grass in the meadow, nestled among a scattering of fir trees, served as the elven commune’s football pitch. Spending time at home was a precious commodity for Thamior Liadon. The youngsters training on the field were from a different village, but Thamior was quickly recognized when he showed up with a couple of friends for some crossing practice. Obligingly, he gave out a few tips on technique.

After about an hour they stopped to gulp down the contents of their waterskins. “This heat makes for a struggle,” Thamior said.

“I expect it will be much like this in Farfadillis.” said Galain.

“More. Flying jellyfish, hell frogs, and everyone going there is taking iodine tablets in preparation because it’s just been bombed with nuclear weapons. But it is said there may be time for giant scorpion hunting, as Kelssek have two matches in that region.”

“I’m certain Brisiain will know what to do with giant scorpion parts,” Galain said. “And for a millennial he is unusually pleasant to talk to.”

Thamior did not share Galain’s disdain for the older generation, though admittedly he did find it refreshing not to feel constantly looked down upon for his relative youth while living in the human realm. It was a little on the nose that Burnaby SC were known as the Centurions, though that had entirely more to do with a long-ago UICA award than the age of the squad or his presence on it.

“I’m wondering, did you ever talk to Thimiscles Seanclair? Left Yesopalitha at a very young age – or so it seems at least. Played in Hinode and now here. I wonder how he is liking it.”

“A bit of rival matchup there – Kingstown Athletic and Burnaby are meant to be at odds. Came close to taking the Golden Glove award this season, actually. Hampered by the small matter of the team not winning the league, I imagine.”

Galain knew that meant Thamior had barely exchanged words with Thimiscles. “You should seek him out. It might be interesting to hear about his experience. His sun-elf kin may be known to be haughty but if he came out this way, it’s not likely he shares those prejudices. Perhaps invite him for the next Midsummer. I’ve brought humans along with no objections raised, you remember.”

Thamior made a soft noise to indicate he would consider the matter.

“In any case, have you never thought of playing in another country?”

“Burnaby is far enough away for me.” Thamior gestured not just at the field but the landscape, framed by snow-capped mountains. Amid the yells of the football players still doggedly scrimmaging could also be heard the rush of the Moonlight Falls, beneath which the commune celebrated its sacred ceremonies. It was one reason he hadn’t looked for a move abroad like many other players on the Kelssek national team, or who hoped to gain a place on the Voyagers.

“Is that not self-limiting? Think back on your own growth, when we were learning the game at the same time as our coaches, sneaking out to scrounge those books and videotapes from that shop in Alavaria. And think of the greatest players to play the game. With all their obsession with isolating ourselves from other peoples, would the elders have ever allowed this field to be cut short if not for the example of Laborious Hawk?”

Thamior didn’t reply straight away, thinking about the strange feeling he’d got back earlier in the season. At one point during the interminable qualifying phase, Colm Ó Tuathail had strolled into the national team locker room fresh off the plane from Audioslavia with Shamrock Cathair gear spilling out his luggage, speaking freely of how it was playing a derby match against Espy va Drake. In the same league, quite literally. Is that what was called envy? Now only Hawk was left among those legends...

---
*Millennial in this context means someone over 1000 years old.

World Cup 85 || RP Thread

WC85 Qualifying - Second Half Recap

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