World Cup 85 || RP Thread

by **Wrecker** » Sat May 23, 2020 10:15 am

54 LOST YEARS – The story of the Wreckerian Civil War
Part 1: Prelude to War
For hundreds of years, the Republic of Wreckeria had been known as a peaceful, albeit isolated nation located in the Atlantian Oceania region. So isolated, in fact, that other peoples in other tribes tended to not even know about this nation in an area known as the Glorious Southwest. There had been some conflicts – namely, the one that led to the Five Founders of Hapilopper breaking off to form their own nation, but aside from that, stayed out of trouble, stayed out of the news, and stayed out of people’s minds.

In the 1960s, however, there was some low-level dissension among members of the Wreckerian government and their supporters. The group, led by a rabble-rouser known as Scott Stone, felt that Wreckeria was not realizing its true potential. They felt that Wreckeria was capable of so much more than it was known for. Certainly, they felt that the Wreckerians could take over the rest of the region if they saw fit, and they made no bones over the fact that the nation’s attitude of peaceful isolationism was just too much for them.

For some time, the group had been dismissed as a lunatic fringe group, a group looking to start something it could not finish. But when Stone made a speech to the Wreckerian Council of Delegates in 1964, then the nation’s sole parliamentary house, it served as a call-to-arms to more than a few people in the nation.

“What are we?” Stone said to the body. “Are we a nation that has gone soft and complacent, just happy to be what we are, this small nation just doing nothing? Or are we a group of people ready to realize our true potential? True Wreckerians aren’t going to rest on their laurels. True Wreckerians are not going to sit back and not seize our own future. The True Wreckerians are going to seize the moment, and seize the future for this great nation! I am not going to sit still and allow this nation to just sit still!”

The speech, known as the “True Wreckerians” speech, inspired millions of Wreckerians to fight for their future. And unfortunately for more than a few people, the word “fight” was taken in more than one way. Stone supporters, now known as the True Wreckerians, decided to take their fight to the streets. Within weeks, protests could be seen outside of Wreckerian government offices, and anywhere Wreckerian President John Adler went.

Adler, before becoming the President of Wreckeria, had been known as a competitor in Wreckeria’s leading stock car racing series, the WSCC. On the track, Adler had been known as a pragmatic and somewhat cautious driver, a talent that led him to two WSCC championships in 1958 and 1961. His popularity was such that the Conservative Party named him their candidate for Wreckerian President in 1960, and was elected to the position fairly handily. By the time the mid-60s had rolled around, Adler had gained a reputation as someone looking to maintain a balance between Wreckeria’s isolationism and advancing it for the future.

People such as Stone had grown tired of this isolationism, and had decided it was time for a change. In 1965, Stone challenged Adler to a debate concerning the nation’s future. The debate, aired on all the television and radio stations across Wreckeria and across portions of neighboring Hapilopper, pit the pragmatic and calm Adler against the idealistic and firebrand Stone. To say the least, it didn’t go well for Adler’s hopes. Even more people across Wreckeria were convinced that now was the time that their beloved nation expand at any cost.

A line spoken by Stone at the debate seemed to whip people into shape in a way nobody thought was possible.

“You see, Mr. President, you can sit on your laurels all you want, but the fact of the matter is, we have to expand and excel, and we’re going to do that, by any means necessary!” Stone roared. “I don’t care what it takes, and I don’t care what we have to do. Wreckeria will be a force to be reckoned with in the years to come.”
It was those comments that might have whipped the wrong type of excitement into shape.

“Had Mr. Stone stayed calm and been a little more pragmatic in his wording, it’s possible that what happened next wouldn’t have happened,” said Amber Bronson, a Wreckerian Civil War historian. “Scott Stone did not pull the trigger. But his actions didn’t help matters at all.”

Throughout 1965 and 1966, tensions across Wreckeria started to mount. There were rumors of President Adler taking action to clamp down the True Wreckerians in some form or fashion. There was talk that Scott Stone was going to be brought in for questioning at any moment. Protests and dissent could be seen across Wreckeria on a daily basis.

And then, on March 18, 1966, everything went to hell.

In Part 2: John Adler is shot, and all hell breaks loose across Wreckeria

by **Turori** » Sat May 23, 2020 10:33 am

Turori Drawn into Group 1 for Marathon Qualifying

It will be the longest Qualifying campaign in the history of the World Cup Finals and the first team on the list, the #1 seed in the #1 slot of Group #1 is the Turori Eels.

With a view towards rebounding after a disappointing early exit from the World Cup 84 Finals, the Turori National Team will kick off a massive 26 Matchday qualification campaign with... a bye on the very first day of competition. While the rest of Group 1 will kick things off the Turori National Team will have one extra day of rest before their qualification campaign gets kicked off on Matchday 2 against a former superpower returning to prominence in Astograth.

Of course while Astograth are first up for the Turori National Team, there are quite a few interesting matchups for the Eels and at least one terrifying opponent: Audioslavia. While the Bulls (or the Slaves) are typically most well known for their ability to lose specific matches as well as any other team in the multiverse - specifically competition finals, there is one other type of specific match that Audioslavia never once had a problem winning. A match against Turori.

The Eels record against Audioslavia has always been nothing short of Abysmal and this was highlighted during the core run of six Turorian Quarter Final appearances. Of that then record number of Quarter Final appearances without advancement, the opponent in fifty percent of those defeats was Audioslavia themselves.

While that won't be a concern this time around, there will still be more than plenty of eyes on the big matchup between Tuorri and Audioslavia on Matchday 4.

While it has been some time since World Cup 84 shut down its doors, Turori's National Citizen Squad have been practicing with some top qualty opposition in the Eagle's Cup. While Turori failed for the second season in a row to reach the top 5 of the tournament, they did manage to Top their group and advance to the Semi-Finals of the Cocoabo Trophy matchup before being ousted by Valanora who would go on to finish 3rd overall in the tournament. It was a high scoring finish to the Eagle's Cup for the Citizen Squad but they always trailed the Marauders despite two goals from young starlet Nua'oma Aikiki in the first hour of the match. Mbdiai Akarenaa gave the home fans a glimmer of hope as stoppage time approached but Turori were unable to find the two goals they needed to continue on in the tournament and crashed out prior to the Semi-Finals for the second consecutive Eagle's Cup running.

 Turori [3] - [5] Valanora
				
	GOALS:	Turori 	:: 32' Nua'oma Aikiki:: 53' Nua'oma Aikiki:: 88' Mbdiai Akarenaa            		
	STATS:	Turori 	:: Possession: 46%:: Shots: 8:: Corners: 14	Valanora 	:: Possession: 54%:: Shots: 12:: Corners: 13
	Lineup:	[GK] Wiyauw An'maude, [D.] Amakli Inuro'o, [D.] Mikki Mayelli, [D.] Lulu Pumaziiri, [D.]  Biliki Rona'atu'i, [ML]  Kentu Umaka'a, [MC] Daliora Toru'u, [MC]  Mbdiai Akarenaa, [MR]  Lati'ala Giaoka, [FC] Meldi'ita Mungwaii, [FC] Nua'oma Aikiki			
	Bench:	[FC] Wiztsana Iretziia, [FC] Mirana Gotuai, [M] Kiidallen Aeroluzzi, [M] Nubara Moafalia, [U ] Yitizo Mpala'a, [D] Moumouni Verre'elali, [GK] Timaala Hualtia

Now, all eyes will be promptly focused back on the World Cup where Turori will attempt to end 70+ Cycles of disappointment in their quest to claim a first World Cup Title. Of course, with 26 matchdays it is possible that the Football Association of Turori tap into the reserves in the Cocoabo Forest as they had during an even shorter qualification campaign during the World Cup 84 cycle. However, considering the poor performance of the Eels at World Cup 84 there have not yet been any confirmations of possible appearances of Turori's National Cocoabo Squad during World Cup 85 Qualifications. It is likely that the Football Association of Turori (FAT) is looking to establish their presence as the dominant force in well-stacked Group 1 before they begin shaking the waters by introducing a Cocoabo squad that looked slightly out of sorts at the recently completed AOCAF competition competing in a hybrid squad for Team Tropicorp.

by **Filindostan** » Sat May 23, 2020 10:49 am

Chanchan
Kabanalan's Speedster | Left back, Venividicci

"At first, I just want to run, and run, and run with the Athletics club. Then I found my friends at the football varsity. That was the point where it all started."

Known to her friends as 'Chanchan', Chantal Grace Li was a college freshman at San Marco State College when she found out that there were different sports clubs in her school. Her physical tests in high school pointed out her strengths as a sprinter, with several records during high school meets broken by her, and up to this day, no one has ever broken that record. She was a member of the athletics team in a high school in Kabanalan where she grew up without her mother, who died when she was just two years old. Her father, a fitness instructor at a local gym, have trained her how the techniques she needed to learn while running. This gave her what she needed to strengthen her thighs and legs and run as fast as she can.

After getting an athletic scholarship from San Marco State, she moved to San Marco to live inside one of the dormitories there. Upon moving in, she started to feel uneasy with her feelings while staying in the dormitory. She wasn't used to being alone without her siblings around while sleeping. She had three other roommates, from the same athletics team she was also in, although she felt that she was being spaced out by her roommates, who are either sophomore or junior. They felt that Chanchan was a threat for them staying at the varsity lineup for that year's university games season. She did her best to reach out to the other three, and they felt the need to communicate with her, even if it just for her to run errands for them, such as turning off the electric fan in their room.

One night, the girls planned a nasty event to occur to Chanchan, as the latter stepped out of her double-decker bed, a heavy flat iron, which the girls set up the cord to be tangled just when Chanchan was stepping out, fell from the table an onto her right ankle, shattering them in the process. Chanchan let a feeble grunt after feeling the immense pain, and as she realize she cannot get up due to her ankle, tears started to flow down her face. The girls, knowing what happened, pretended to be concerned to the fallen girl, and brought her to the school infirmary. Unfortunately, the doctors told her that she'll be on the shelf for 10 months.

Chanchan would miss the entirety of her freshmen athletic season, watching from the sidelines as she still supported the girls who orchestrated the events that day. One of the seniors of the varsity team approached her and revealed the information that it was planned by her roommates all along. Unfortunately, she did not have any strength left to speak out to her upperclassmen, she immediately left the oval, in crutches, teary-eyed as she tried to walk back to her dorm. She knew that something was off then. The next day, she resigned from the athletics club, and asked to move dormitories, as she thought that she would be out of the program already. She didn't tell the administrators that it was her roommates that caused her injury, trying to avoid a catastrophic collapse of the team.

One of the administrators asked her, "Would you like to keep your scholarship?"

"How?" She asked with disbelief still in her eyes.

"There are other athletic clubs here in SMSC. For instance, you can join the basketball or the football teams. You need to rehabilitate your ankles first."

"But I don't have any friends in those clubs."

"Eh, you need to open yourself to other people as well. I'm pretty confident that you can do it."

"Okay, let me try."

"Great, I'll give you two months to decide which varsity you want to be in. Once your injury is healed, I'll help you regain your momentum."

Nonetheless, the administrators granted her request to switch dormitories to a non-varsity one, in which she was assigned a room with three fellow freshmen. One of them was planning to try out for the football team.

"Hi there, what's your name? I'm Lestari. Mega Lestari Lie"

"I'm... Chanchan"

"Chanchan... you mean the Chanchan who held several athletic records in high school??"

"Y-y-y-yes. that would be me."

"Great! could you help me get into the football team? I want to play for the national team soon and play with the Empress someday."

"Sure, I'll help you get into the varsity. Maybe I'll tryout too."

Little by little, Chanchan gained friends she can talk with and started her rehabilitation plan in time for the next athletics season.

by **Flavovespia** » Sat May 23, 2020 11:24 am

Kings Lunsel

The First Kit

After the split of Lunselbury into two bitter rivals, Kings Lunsel and Abbots Lunsel, both teams were looking for a new identity. For Kings Lunsel, they began with a vertically striped black and white kit in 55BU. Striped kits were relatively new, and the combination itself was eye-catching, and the colours somewhat matched those adopted by the new city. The black and white kit of Kings Lunsel is probably one of the most well known in the nation, with many knowing immediately which team they represent. Despite this kit being used for 3 seasons, they actually had a plethora of different kit designs used in the following years, and of course wore the league mandated all black for several seasons in the GWNFA Super League. When the choice of kits returned to the clubs, Kings Lunsel brought back their first kit as their home colours. The rest is history.

Celebrated Classic

Kings Lunsel have, for the most part since the time teams had free choice of their kits, worn black and white vertical stripes, although exceptions exist. This meant that it wasn’t that easy to choose a distinctive and liked classic for Kings Lunsel. Nevertheless, the fans and our panel have chosen the 23BU and 22BU effort as their favourite. Most Kings Lunsel shirts had full coloured sleeves, but this was one of the shirts that had put stripes on the sleeves. The kit looked tidy and clean, both in its day and still to the modern eye, and is a template on how to make a good kit for Kings Lunsel.

Modern Marvel

Again, for a team with quite a rigid kit template for the most part, it’s hard to pinpoint a kit that really stands out as a modern era classic for Kings Lunsel. The 10AU effort is the one selected by us however. In a time when many teams were beginning to return to more elaborate, and sometimes over the top kits, Kings Lunsel kept it nice and simple with that smart design. The stripes are broken up with a little bit of cuff and collar trim, in a good effect.

Colour of Success

14AU was the year that Kings Lunsel won their first ever modern era title, and also reached the GWFA Cup semi final, so it’s the season chosen for their segment on The Colour of Success. This kit from a design perspective probably isn’t ever going to be a classic. The all black sleeves and black panels on the body make it feel like the kit is a bit too heavy on one colour. The white panels on the shoulders don't really balance that, and add unnecessary clutter to the shirt The kit doesn’t contain any additional coloured patterning, a trend of that era, but nevertheless it contains some unnecessary elements.

Fashion Disaster

The 10BU kit for Kings Lunsel won this decision in a landslide. The team had worn vertical stripes the majority of the time, but at times experimented with horizontal stripes. What nobody wanted however, was the two of those combined. This kit was absolutely shocking in appearance, causing bemusement across the nation. It was described as a “tea towel” or “dining table cloth” by many, and lead to the term “Kings set” being used for a black and white pattern of that type. The kit was dumped after one season, and never again have the club attempted to go with something like that since.

by **Ziwana** » Sat May 23, 2020 11:35 am

The night in Gato Uyuri:The greatest night in Akambuku history.

By Chosadziwa Botolo

The heroes that helped bring the Melayu Archipelago Cup home.

It has been five months since the Ziwana football national team won the fourth CMFA Melayu Archipelago Cup, to become Kings of the Melayu Archipelago. Although Ziwana was the highest rated team in the tournament, there was a real chance of the team not even qualifying from the group stage. The Akambuku were drawn against an ambitious Havynwilde side that had players who had been performing very well at club level in the multiverse, and there was also experienced side Sharktail who were returning back to regional football after a two year hiatus. With such capable sides Ziwana had to be on its A game, and stay on its A game it did. Sharktail and Ziwana were on different levels in multiverse football after the Akambuku's performances in the Baptism of Fire and in the World Cup Qualifiers were it won a lot of praise for its 'umodzi,umodzi' football. However, Ziwani manager, Ngonamo was not complacent and fielded a strong side against Sharktail. The result was a 3-2 win inspired by the captain, Jean Wilder who scored a brace. Debut player center mid, Kawoa also bagged himself a goal on the night. The managers bravery in dropping national team favorites, Graham and Thomas due to terrible performances in the domestic league that season was paying off. The next game against Havynwilde arrived and they outplayed Ziwana in the first half. They had all the possession and their defense stopped Jean Wilder from finding space and shooting. Their good performance gave them an early goal in the 5th minute of the first half. At half time an enraged Ngonamo gave the boys the hair dryer treatment and substituted Haqawi out for Casimir. This substitution helped and Casimir scored in the 65th minute and assisted Jean Wilder for the winner in the 88th minute. The win meant Ziwana had qualified for the Quarter Finals and would be facing Southern Palm Islands. They easily won the game against Southern Palm Islands with goals from Charles Payen, Haqawi and Jonathan Boi, however they got complacent and allowed two goals in. In the Semi-Final against Permecutan, Jean Wilder scored but got injured in the process. This affected the team and only went through after extra time from a Dimanche goal.

With a leader and prolific scorer injured, Ziwani football fans debated who was going to replace Jean Wilder. Other recommended the Liga Malicky golden boat winner Dimanche whilst others recommended for the experienced Bayaram whose goals had helped Black Leopard win the league. Another anxiety trigger for the Ziwani national team and its fans was the fact that they would be facing the host Soracana Islands. Soracana Islands had not played multiverse football but was a strong side that had home ground advantage. As the day of the finals approached the Ziwani Imperial Government bought match tickets, plane tickets and booked hotels for fans who wanted to travel to the Soracana Islands to support the Akambuku in the finals. The night of the finals, 25,768 Ziwani fans attended the match, all dressed in Ziwani replica kits, some painted in Ziwani colours and others dressed as Ziwani warriors. Drums were played as Ziwani fans danced, sung and drunk their Orami Mkango beers. Soracana Islanders are big fans of Ziwani football but this night they all united to paint the city and stadium red and blue. Gato Uyuri was very loud this night. Ziwani fans were excited after seeing Jean Wilder on the match sheet, however he did not last long in the match as he limped out in the 8th minute replaced by Dimanche. Dimanche seemed very nervous in this game and missed so many chances, this frustrated Ziwani supporters. In the 25th minute Soracana Islands scored, Ziwani trophy glory was slowly slipping away. The Akambuku players seemed very frustrated and were losing their composure, Charles Payen tried his best to calm the squad down. This worked as he assisted Haqawi in scoring a goal in the last minutes of the first half. In the second half Diamanche was replaced by Bayaram who was more composed. However Soracana Islands were playing more defensive and Ziwana would not break through, it was really intense with several fouls from both sides. Bayaram scored an absolute screamer in the 78th minute, however the goal was disallowed as an offside. Ziwana eventually scored in the second half of extra time from a Fernandes header. This goal will forever be in Akambuku fans memories, after the goal fans all around Ziwana and in the stadium were all ecstatic as they celebrated this wonderful goal. with 5 minutes left on the clock, Akambuku players defended hard against the Soracana Islanders and wasted time.When the whistle was heard to end the game, Ziwani fans all jumped up, enemies embraced and kissed each other, women offered free pleasure, bars and pubs offered discount on drinks, cars in the roads hooted their horns in celebrations. The trophy was a long time coming, after failing to get past the semi-finals last time. In football these moments are to be cherished and as the Ziwani national team starts its World Cup Qualifiers campaigned i would like to remind the players of this moment. Never forget the joy of lifting a trophy, a joy of making the fans and your family proud. Work hard, stay sharp and don't underestimate your enemy. Play the best 'umodzi,umodzi' football you have ever played and eventually one day, you will lift the NS World Cup. Experience, resilience and patience are the qualities of champions.

by **Gyatso-kai** » Sat May 23, 2020 11:56 am

[

THE MINISTRY OF CULTURE, SPORTS & TOURISM
A Guide to the Home Stadiums
For the 85th Edition of the World Cup of Football

The Avatarian Republics of Gyatso-kai is a complex nation compared to many in this multi-verse; a theocratic supranational republic built out of six distinct cultural nations, yet still presents itself as one unified Republic. Each of the seven cultural Home Nations - The Water Tribes, the Unified Earth Kingdoms, the Fire Nation, the Nomadic Air People, the Mandalorian Clans, and the Ponyist Realms - carries with them a unique set of cultural traditions and practices that are as distinct from one another as night and day.

Yet with all these differences, there is one thing which every nation has in common.

A fervent passion for sports.

The devotion of the Avatarian citizens to the realm of Multi-Verse sports is immeasurable. With all the uniqueness of each Home Nation, you can be certain that the love for the National Teams unites all under the banner of Gyatso-kai. With the most popular being Ice Hockey, you would be hard-pressed to find anyone who does not have a new or old sweater in their closets, from both before The Silence and after; a recent search on uBuy shows vintage sweaters from all the way back to the 18th World Cup of Hockey going for upwards of 2,000¥. However, with all the devotion to the Ice Bisons and the domestic AHL, you will also find an equal devotion to the second most popular multi-verse sport.

Football, or as it is called in Gyatso-kai 美游戏 (měiyóuxì) or taab'rugam (to distinguish it from the domestic code of football known as meshgeroya[/i]), is second only to ice hockey in terms of popularity in the Avatarian Republics. With two domestic leagues, a collegiate system, as well as a series youth developmental leagues, nearly 30% of all children play football at some point in their development. Given the ease of equipment and playing surfaces - no dedicated facilities for a ring and no protective equipment required - football is slowly beginning to outpace ice hockey as the preferred national sport. Though, perhaps if we had a World Cup in our cabinets, maybe then the Ice Bisons would not be the national sweethearts.

A Brief History of the Republic Premier Football League

The top professional league for Football in Gyatso-kai, the Republic Premier Football League (共和国超美游戏联赛, Gònghéguó Chāoměiyóuxì Liánsài, Tsad'Droten Maap Taab'rusgam Tsad), commonly referred to as either RPFL in Basic or 国超联赛 (Guó Chāoiánsài / Tsad Maap'Tsad (TMT), is comprised of 20 different teams spread throughout the Republics. Each team has a devoted fan base, and games regularly succeed in having attendance levels into the 60,000s or higher, with the largest team surpassing 80,000.

The season runs for 38 games, with each team playing the other nineteen teams twice; a home and away series, usually on either end of the season. Operating on a system of promotion and relegation with the second-tier league known as Taap-A in both Basic and Mando'a, every third season, the bottom three RPFL teams are relegated to Taap-A, while the top two teams in Taap-A are promoted to the RPFL, with the third RPFL team replaced by the winner of a play-off series between the teams ranked third through sixth in Taap-A.

Founded in 1869 as a league specifically for the Mandalorian code of meshgeroya (a more physical form of the game which historically explains why the current Avatarian form of football is a bit more physical than most nations), the RPFL began as the United Meshgeroya System with six teams all located in the northern expanse of the Republics. Since then, it has expanded to twenty teams located throughout Gyatso-kai divided into two conferences; the Eastern and the Western. Conference play is determined by records against conference teams; a record may look something like XX-XX-XX (xx-xx) with the order being Win-Draw-Lose, and the numbers in parenthetical referring to the teams record against teams in their conference. Each conference is made up of ten teams, and there are no draws in conference games: A game which finds itself tied after regulation and eight minutes of extra time will move on to penalty kicks. This system of conferences is used to determine the teams that play an exhibition match during the All-Star week that occurs at the end of every season; with the two top teams playing for the Conference Chalice. Often times, players view the conference chalice as the true champions cup for the league, even though the Premier Trophy is awarded to the team that garnishes the most points in the season.

A Guide to the Home Stadiums[/b]

Every World Cup, a selection committee selects the three or more stadiums that will be used to host the Qualifying Leg of the World Cup tournament. Since The Silence, this committee has selected the same three stadiums, though there is talk within the National Sports Council that in the next edition of the tournament, an additional stadium will be added, given the ever-increasing size of the World Cup pools.

Each stadium is a premier-level building, with training facilities located closely by, as well as hotel and travel accommodations in the general vicinity. Each is located in a Level A city of Gyatso-kai, and as such, is set to represent the pride of the selected Home Nation to the world.

*************

Official Name: Stadium of the Republics
Local Name: The Bowl
Seating Capacity: 83,686
Location: Republic City, Republic Capital Territory, Gyatso-kai
Games Hosted: MD 07, MD 12, MD 17, MD 19

Located in the premier Zhaoyang District of the Republics' Capital, the Stadium of the Republics is the largest football stadium in the entirety of Gyatso-kai. Home to the R.C. United team in the RPFL, the stadium is one of the most contested grounds in the entire league; seeing as R.C. United has been the top-placed team in each of the last four seasons, as well as dominating conference play. A short drive from the largest airport in the nation - Roku Capital International Airport - as well as some of the largest and most prestigious hotels in all of Gyatso-kai, a team that plays in "The Bowl" is sure to feel more than pampered. A truly multi-verse city, with the amenities one would expect, Republic City welcomes any and all fans from all across the multi-verse to sample the true amalgamation of Avatarian culture that is our capital.

Three of the four games hosted at The Bowl feature teams that are also in the Atlantian Oceania Confederation; with Wreckeria traveling to the Republics for the first time in their football history, Busoga returning after AOCAF Cup 59, and Torisakia returning to Gyatso-kai for the first time since World Cup 63. In addition to the AO teams, one other team has been granted the privilege of playing in our Republics' capital, given the long and storied rivalry our two nations have developed over the years. The People's Republic of Donnacona, which was once known as Cotdelapoms, has returned to the multi-verse stage, and to welcome them, the National Sports Council has extended to them, not only the right to play in the greatest stadium in all of Gyatso-kai, but also the choice to wear any of their three kits that they so see fit. For the first time in over 20 jì the blue and white apples will be hoisted above the crowds, and we can only hope that Les Bernaches will give us a fantastic opponent on the twelfth matchday.

Official Name: Stadia Capital
Local Name: The Stadia
Seating Capacitu: 78,050
Location: Beijing, Jing Prefecture, Earth Kingdom, Gyatso-kai
Games Hosted:MD 01, MD 09, MD 15, MD 26

Located on the far western shores of Gyatso-kai, Beijing is one of the largest Earth Kingdom Cities in the nation. Taking its name from the bastion-like construction of Beijing, as well as its status as the capital of the fledgling Republics before the Unification, the Stadia Capital is another premier arena set to host five World Cup matches, including the opening match against Kohnhead.

Given that Beijing is an Earth Kingdom City, fans in attendance will be given a crash course in Earth Kingdom traditions and life. Do not be surprised should you come across bending in your journey; unlike the egalitarian nature of Republic City and the territories of the United Republics, Earth Kingdom people take great pride to incorporate their natural bending talents into their everyday lives. From train-car systems that rely on gravity to come downhill and bending to move uphill, to the Pro-Bending League games that will be held at the Earthen Ring during all five matchdays, visitors from around the multi-verse will get a taste of the blending of the traditional and the modern that occurs throughout the Republics.

Official Name: Meshgeroya'yaim
Local Name: Mesh'yaim
Seating Capacit:y 79,890
Location: Keldabe, Keldabe Autonomous Province, Mandalore, Gyatso-kai
Games Hosted: MD 03, MD 05, MD 21, MD 23

For the truly brave traveler, the four games held in the third-largest city of Mandalore will be quite a contrasting view than those held in Republic City or Beijing. The sights of citizens in the traditional beskar'gam of the Mandalorian Clans - from their vivid colors and striking patterns to their keen obsession with weaponry - may be a bit much for the less-than-adventurous traveler. Be warned... the Mandalorian people love to show off their culture, and any fan who finds themselves exploring the local taverns and public houses will certainly experience it fully and unabashed.

Just make sure when you walk in, you ring the beskar'naumiit... the giant bell to the side of the entry way. And no, it isn't missing the chord to ring it. You punch it...

The Meshgeroya'yaim - 'Home of the Beautiful Game' in Mando'a - is an incredible stadium located on a high elevated cliff overlooking the city of Keldabe. The capital of the province of the same name, Keldabe is a true Mandalorian town, where the traditional has been adapted to serve the modern needs. The stadium itself, which has stood on the same ground since 1890, is a hearkening back to the old ways of Mandalore. In a time when clan rules was established through combat, the Mesh'yaim has the feel of an old coliseum, with the iron sides of the outside shielding the area from all noise that is not from the game. Of course, whenever a goal is scored by the home side, the resounding roar of the Kaab'akaan could be heard through the entire region and everyone in Keldabe knew their team had made a goal.

Unfortunately, the Kaab'akaan is turned off during multi-verse play, and only sounded at the start of each half, to signal the end, and then blown twice to signal the game's conclusion.

by **Audioslavia** » Sat May 23, 2020 12:57 pm

Utterly sick of the sight of the conflict between reams of notes on her table and the still-empty notebook in her left hand, Susan Dysos looked up at a small statuette on the mantlepiece, confidently announced that it could proceed forth and be fruitful (though not in as many words), and got very close to deciding that sitting in front of the TV eating a yoghurt would be a better way to spend her late afternoon. The decision making process was halted by the look on the face of the statuette on the mantlepiece. She’d never really looked at it before. There was something not quite right about that.

The statuette had been in her house for years. Just under a foot tall, heavy, marble, trying to look hellenic and not even hitting bonham-carteric, a naked figure of a modestly endowed pouty cleft-chinned curly-haired dude who the sculptor clearly had a thing for. Staring blankly at something in the sky just to his left and contemplating pointing at it. Probably more at home on a vaporwave album cover than a doric art exhibition.

Susan grabbed it and took it back to the armchair with her. She found herself remembering something a programmer had once told her. Something called ‘rubber ducking’, wherein when they weren’t entirely sure how a piece of code all fit together, they explained it to an inanimate object. Something that looked stupid. Like a rubber duck. The stupider you thought the effigy the better, as it meant you’d have to explain things as simply as possible. This was certainly a dumb statue. She placed the model on the desk in such a way so that it was staring up at her like a dog that had just been shown a card trick.

“Right then, you. Let me explain all this to you” she said, gesturing at the reams of newspapers, handscrawled notes and photocopied pages from police reports and true-crime novels she had out in front of her. She narrowed her eyes at it.
“You don’t have a name yet. I’m going to call you Papaki” she said, nodding. It was either the greek word for ‘duck’ or the russian word for some kind of intimate act, she couldn’t remember which. She had a deep stretch and said “Right”.

My name’s Susan Dysos. I’m a journalist. I’m also one of those people who turn out to be unexpectedly immortal. The word for an Audioslavian who turns out to be unexpectedly immortal, and the reason given for unexpected immortality, seems to change every four years. Nobody really knows why. It’s of no concern to you because you’re immortal in a different way. Oh, and it doesn’t mean I can’t be murdered or die of a disease or some heinous shit like that, it’s just that between the ages of 35 and 150 I only aged about seven years. That was a big giveaway, if I’m being honest.

I’m married to a guy called Rubio Sanchez, who is also a journalist and, unfortunately for him and everyone, Krytenian. He’s also immortal, which is actually quite cool because staying 35 for a century and watching him grow old and die would have sucked.

Rubio is closely associated with a guy called Jeremy Jaffacake, who is the most famous person in Audioslavia in the same way that an exceptionally smelly poop would be the most notable part of a public lavatory. He calls himself a ‘podcaster’ these days, which means he only does three hours of work a week and most of that consists of trying to pretend he’s not advertising VPNs, underwear and shaving accessories. He does the podcast with a Mrii called Daphnaes Hanson, who more often goes by the monicker Defecating Daffodil for reasons best known to himself.

Podcasting is only the most recent thing Jeremy is famous for. He’s always been a journalist in some capacity, stretching back to at least the time of World Cup 4. Yes, he’s immortal too. He’s been alive for hundreds of years. In his case he looks about 76. When I first met him he looked to be in his mid sixties. Make of that what you will. A few years ago he was wearing jeans and leather jackets and presenting a TV show about cars. Before that he was president of the NS World Cup Committee before being forced out and forced into exile for ‘financial irregularities’, which basically means he had his fingers in more pies than a Beano Frey Bentos.

Okay I’ll quickly explain that one. ‘Beano’ is a comic book that features Dennis the Menace (but probably not the Dennis the Menace you’re thinking of) and generally features young boys getting up to japes up to and including stealing warm pies from windowsills. Frey Bentos makes pies. Well, technically Frey Bentos makes tins of thin stew that wear hats, but he calls them pies and it’s a funnier phrase to say than ‘Greggs the Bakers’.

Before that, Jeremy was involved with - and eventually the head of - the Football Federation of Audioslavia. Before that he had been just a regular journalist and Sports Editor of newspapers like the Cathair Herald and the Emberton Post, but that period of his life has a short hiatus at some point. Around the time of World Cup 65 Jeremy was in semi-retirement, living out in Calorborne. Calorborne is an island in Rushmore that’s technically governed by Audioslavia. It’s a strange place in that time runs slower there. Much slower. A year on Calorborne is around twelve years here in the multiverse. Sometimes ten, sometimes twenty, at one point nearer fifty. It rather depends. Calorborne is a place where regular people can go in order to get a feel for how the immortals live. Only about one person in a hundred million is an immortal. The idea is you go to Calorborne for a two-week holday, probably saving a lot of money beforehand because it’s prohibitively expensive unless you’re either wealthy, a very successful criminal or both, and come back to the real world around a year later but only two weeks older. Jeremy Jaffacake had gone there to live, for a while, but when he made a return he made it in Kjeligsted. What’s Kjeligsted? Pfft… here we go.

Kjeligsted is an island just to the north of Audioslavia, separated by what we call the Oily Oljeflod River, which is technically a channel and literally translates as the ‘Oily Oil River River’. Kjeligsted is very similar to Audioslavia, with the main difference being that it’s an islamic country. These days it’s fairly progressive by those standards, but back in the day it was pretty staunch. No alcohol, pork, stuff like that. Shortly after that no-alcohol law came in, Jeremy Jaffacake moved there. A strange thing to do for a man who’s had more spirits in him than a delusional medium. At that point, I admit, he was either in the middle of, or at the end of, a bout of being tee-total, so who knows.

There in Kjeligsted he became a known associate of Jon Mozos, a barman in a very swanky hotel. Yes. A barman. The hotel served non-alcoholic drinks. Jon Mozos was of no consequence other than the fact that he was a massive bellend and his brother, at that point, was the assistant manager of the Audioslavian national football team. Alvaro Mozos. Around this time, Audioslavia’s national team were playing their home matches in Kjeligsted at the 1927 Stadium, making them one of the only national teams to have called a stadium in a foreign country their ‘home’ stadium. At one Audioslavia home game against a team named Bloodbath Generation, Jeremy Jaffacake took Jon Mozos. The two men clearly knew each other. Rubio Sanchez saw them both together and talked to the two of them, without asking why or how on earth they knew each other.

Weeks later, Jeremy Jaffacake had left the country. Jon Mozos was arrested, along with Guido Saed, Clyde Ferrer, Theodore Bartholemew Whistler, Sebastian Francis Whistler and Mark Antwan. All are found guilty of running an illegal speakeasy on Kjeligsted. All sentenced according to Kjeligsted law. Sentenced to eight years in prison followed by the removal of the left hand. It turned out that this Theodore Bartholemew Whistler was actually a Taeshani called Ted who was a known criminal and, somehow, a former centre-half for the Audioslavia national football team around cycle 59. Ferrer left prison early, which kind of implies he’d talked to the authorities. Shortly after, a warrant was put out for Jeremy Jaffacake’s arrest. Jaffacake was nowhere to be seen, having gone back to Calorborne. Shortly after that, the Football Federation of Audioslavia - the organization Jaffacake was involved with at the time - announced a last-minute decision to bid to host the World Cup. To do this, they’d need to build a new stadium for their national team, which they did in Cathair, meaning they’d never have to go back to Kjeligsted.

Jon Mozos served three years in prison due to failing health. Mark Antwan died in his sixth year of prison, Sebastian Whistler died in seventh, ‘Ted’ served an extended twenty-five year sentence after being found guilty of murder of three cellmates, including brother Sebastian.

Police reports from the time state that they think a couple of ponies had been involved as well, which possibly implies a Karditani connection.

Audioslavia and The Inevitable Syndicate won the bid to host World Cup 66, which was surprising to those who hadn’t realised that their bid was just as good as any other and to cry about favouritism or popularity is laughably pathetic. The 66 Stadium, quickly renamed the Arena Kirola for sponsorship reasons, gets built in Cathair. 1830 Cathair turn professional, become founder members of the LigAnaia and start playing in it. The FFA hasn’t needed to bother with Kjeligsted since.

Okay, now the good bit. The police knew they were looking for one other person, but they didn’t know who. From what we’ve been able to piece together, this is the same person who’d been responsible for a number of Robin Hood-esque heists in which they seduced a wealthy lady, bedded them, and stole something important from their house. In every case, the important thing was something that belonged to the wealthy family, but shouldn’t have. Stuff that belonged in museums or with their rightful owners. The thief was a popular figure in the Audioslavian media at the time, but his identity was completely unknown other than that he had, at various points, gone under the names Yusuf Naid, Guiseppe Cavallo, Joe Knight and many more.

The story became popular again when the… okay, deep breath… when the wife of the grandson of the detective who almost caught Yusuf Naid, one Elizabeth Aarden, occasionally known as ‘Betsy’, included the story in a book she wrote about true crime after she retired from the police force. Her husband, Rory Wyatt-Holmes has also, now, retired.

I’ve been helped by those two, plus most of the above people who aren’t either dead or Jeremy Jaffacake, in order to try to figure out exactly who this famous gentleman thief was. I’m not doing this in order to write a book or get him arrested or anything, I just… I just need to know… y’know?

Papaki stared blankly at her. Susan tried to imagine what he'd say.

Susan imagined he'd be wondering what a Karditan is. She hadn't explained that. She wasn't sure she knew how.

"About Karditan" she said. "Backwards equine totalitarian BoF-losing crime-infested clusterfuck. It stood to reason that at least one Karditani would be involved. Probably a pony. I only know one Karditani who isn't a pony, though he's certainly... though..."

Susan stared at the statue. She folded her arms. "There's probably a good reason why I haven't looked him up" she said, staring into the middle distance.

The statue stared at Susan expectantly. Susan blinked.

Huh.

by **Tequilo** » Sat May 23, 2020 1:09 pm

TAPALUPÉ, Tequilo - Welcome to the brand new extra-glossy pitxi magazine GOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-a!!! - launched just in time for Tequilo’s debut in World Cup ’85. We’ll be bringing you news and views in the GOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-a!!! Daily; with World Cup match reports and team news brought to you via our special app, the Copametro; we’ll be doing some Tracking & Tracing in our new regular column, Where Are They Now? and, in an exclusive deal with the estate of the country’s most beloved vintage comic-strip football star, we are proud to announce the revival of Rúi de Los Rovas, and the return of legendary Rúi Raza of top fictional football giants Blackburn Rovers.

The new Rúi launches 120 years after the publication of the very first comic strip, and features Rúi as a 120-year old geriatric still going strong in football running his player agency with son Roque Raza, now 91, grandson Ronaldo Raza, a sprightly 65, and introducing great granddaughter Rita Raza, 33, who is just winding down after a spectacular playing career at the ever-so-modern mixed gender Premier League titans Preston North End, who older fans of the comic strip will remember were Rovers’ deadly rivals and regularly won the comic-book version of the UICA, called ‘The Champions League’. You are going to love the new format, the modernisation of the concept to reflect all the modern real world developments like the all-new IFCF, VAR and Liga-TQ, and the introduction of the fifth generation of the Raza footballing aristocracy as Rita’s young son Rodi signs youth terms for an ailing Rovers, now down in the basement of ’The Football League’. Can young Rodi emulate his great-great grandfather and make Blackburn Rovers the ‘World Club Champions’ once more? Stay tuned to find out… only in GOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-a!!!

[Editors semi-OOC note - to save you the time, that is 15xLs in there for the correct format, should you wish to quote our exciting new publication].

Every week GOLa (that’s our cute diminutive for our new cuddly mag) will also bring you the best in Tequiloan pitxi journalism, starting in our maiden issue with a run-down on how the new Liga-TQ national championship is going work; indeed, if it is going to work at all.

PRIMERA, PROXIMA & PEQUEÑO
A Follower’s Guide To The Brand New Liga-TQ

A national league for Tequilo? How could that be possible? As a confederation of six former sovereign states and three Índigo kingdoms, the country itself has a strong sense of diverse places and peoples - together with a vast and challenging geography. This is reflected in the organisation of pitxi, which has for more than century run as separate state championships. That is a lot of history: six leagues of several tiers, 120-plus seasons, hundreds of teams. Each state alone could name ten or more ‘big teams’ at the top of their pile - indeed, each state literally does have it’s ‘State-10’ who are the elite in that division, plus one, two or three in the ‘National-10’ - the very best ten teams nationwide according to the number of state titles they have one. You cannot take the state structure away - even if you merged them into countrywide divisions of 20 teams, there would be teams that consider themselves too big for a second tier - would never accept a second tier spot - who would actually be in a third tier of that model. Antivadorio giants Florentino, a legendary team with 15 state titles to their name, but in such a vast array of clubs, and such extended history, they are only tenth overall in the title stakes, just inside the ‘big-10’ and suddenly, in a unified league, they are very mid-table. The case of Motozintla, one of the most famous names in pitxi, is more extreme: ten state titles sounds impressive, but that puts them well into the second tier of the collected greats, a position they could never accept.

The desire of the Unión Pitxi de Tequilo, the UPT, to elect a national champion on merit has existed since the beginning of time - or at least the beginning of pitxi - and many proposals have come and gone. But now, desiring membership of the NSWC and keen to take part in the successor of the fancy UICA multiversal order - the IFCF - the Unión has had to find a solution that works for them, for Florentino, for Motozintla FC and for the likes of Humberto and Galaxía, who would suddenly be relegated from state icons to third tier clubs at best. Though there is plenty of cynicism and a deal of mockery perhaps after all the UPT, not known for their genius moves, have in fact made the genius move of all genius moves: Liga-TQ. From the outside perhaps it seems obvious, and surprises many that it has taken 123 years to come up with such an idea, but there you are. As they say in Tequilo, ’the speed of uptake is an irrelevance when the cruising altitude provides such a stunning view’, which is also to say, ‘we’ll get there eventually, don’t worry’.

The state championships remain; 2-, 3-, and in some cases 4-Sección, the tiers within championships, will remain, as will the pyramid below that. The one nationwide competition that does provide a national champion of sorts, the huge knock-out Copa Tequilo, remains. But what the UPT is banking on, above all, is a new cut above the rest that everyone can buy into - Liga-TQ, the post-state championship deciders.

Under this format, the top three in each state at the end of regular season move into sections for a small round robin. That is three small divisions of six teams. At the top, the six state champions will play a further ten games in the Primera, to decide the national champion and the qualifiers for the IFCF. All the second-placed teams will compete in a similar league, the Proxima, to decide places 7-12 in the final national standings. And finally, third-placed teams will compete in the Pequeño for places 13-18 in the national rankings. A fourth post-season round robin, the Eliminatorio, will feature the winners of the six 2-Sección or second-tier state divisions competing for a place in the Serie-B Mitropa Agla-Italoi Cup, or the IFCF lower league competition, which offers three places per league.

The hype around the coming Liga-TQ has been enormous in the country for the last two years since the agreement with the clubs was finally struck - and the UPT has been clever to ride this hype, building a willing audience for new TV deals, and creating a mini-competition at the end of the previously sacrosanct state championships that both elevates the championships and supercedes it in the same stroke. The title of national champion will finally be a valid one, and should be extremely competitive, given the task to even qualify for the Primera Sección in the first place. State championships are notoriously hard to come by - don’t forget the two most successful teams of all time, Pitxi-Pitxi 77 and CF Frantxizko-A, have won 21 state championships each, three more than anyone else, but not won a state championship between them for 12 years. Neither would have qualified for the Primera Sección in that time. It means that, as the state championships get under way, it is nigh impossible to select a favourite for the national title. Now if that is not exciting, I don’t know what is: and if that is not an act of genius on the part of the UPT, then there is no such thing as genius. (Many have speculated that, within the UPT at least, this is entirely correct).

NEXT TIME
What’s Up In The Next Issue of GOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-a!!!

Coming soon - Tequilo take on the world in the Baptism of Fire, and come out (almost) on top - what happened in Delaclava, Ethane and The Appalachian Nation? Plus, a new guide to the 10-Nacional - our nation’s ‘big ten’ clubs; with full breakdowns of each ‘state 10’ behind them. What ever became of Haizinto, of Adé Fredou, and Oooóooos? And the return of Rúi de Los Rovas. Only in GOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL-a!!! - reserve your pixel-based copy today at reputable forums and other virtual outlets.

by **TJUN-ia** » Sat May 23, 2020 1:49 pm

It's not every day that you have an opportunity to face up against what many people consider the "godfather" of your sport - the pioneer, the most recognisable face, the one you can turn to when you need to know what to do. But when that opportunity arises you must take it, and try and use it to the best of your ability.

That is the expectation tonight here in Cathair, Audioslavia as a 105th ranked TJUN-ian squad prepare to take on the 22nd ranked Bulls on Audioslavian turf. The Jaguars have been decked out for the occasion: the new kits, supplied by NNS of Filindostan, will make their debut tonight.

The Blue and Orange will be in Orange and Blue for tonight with GK Gylfisson in his "bumblebee" design. I know some might laugh but to me, this kit is remarkable - a sign that TJUN-ia is worth it on the international stage, if Micheal Stefan didn't already prove that only a few days ago. The Bulls will be in Green and Red and ready to use their unorthodox 5-5-0 formation to great effect by the power of Kontrapuntzeka. Many back home will be watching this game, as the Golden Bear 500 in Hampton Island will have both Qualifying and the Race tomorrow, and most will not expect much from the Jags against these supposedly-cursed Bulls.

But we've been here before. Last cycle we travelled to Taeshan, another pot 2 team, with no idea how the road ahead would lie after our efforts in the BoF. The Jaguars, under recently-appointed manager Seems, pulled off a shock and managed to take a point away from the Purple Knights. It was the result we needed before we went on to finish a respectable 6th in the Group.

So will tonight be a case of déjà vu for these Jags, or will the Bulls be too much to handle? I guess there is only one way to find out. It's expected that around 7,000 TJUN-ians will be in attendance at the Arena Kirola tonight, known to locals as the 66 Stadium. We know that millions more will be watching at home via the regional sporting networks. See you tonight and GO JAGS!

SCHEDULE (Updates on stadiums will occur as soon as we get them)
MD1: @Audioslavia (22) - Arena Kirola, Cathair
MD2: vs Euran Oceania Territories (84) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
MD3: @Porticalia (330)
MD4: vs Sajnur (57) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong
MD5: @Jeckland (UR) - Jecken Stadium, Rack City
MD6: vs Natanians and Nosts (131) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky
MD7: @Villablanca (235)
MD8: BYE
MD9: vs New Lusitania and the Algarves (42) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky
MD10: @Necosia (341)
MD11: vs Turori (12) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
MD12: @Astograth (303) - Castle Hill, Gesterlake
MD13: vs Muradil (212) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
-----------------------Off Day---------------------------
MD14: vs Audioslavia (22) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
MD15: @Euran Oceania Territories (84)
MD16: vs Porticalia (330) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong
MD17: @Sajnur (57) - ?
MD18: vs Jeckland (UR) - Tiankong Stadium, Tiankong
MD19: @Natanians and Nosts (131) - Stadion Nacional (?)
MD20: vs Villablanca (235) - Beregozera Stadium, Szensky
MD21: BYE
MD22: @New Lusitania and the Algarves (42) - Estádio Dom Dinis, Leiria
MD23: vs Necosia (341) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
MD24: @Turori (12)
MD25: vs Astograth (303) - National Stadium, TJUN-ia City
MD26: @Muradil (212)

by **Lisander** » Sat May 23, 2020 1:57 pm

by **Oberour Ar Moro** » Sat May 23, 2020 2:33 pm

Conmore des Paveillons was going on minute 30 of his 10-minute remarks, and even Collas d'Arcueil was getting restless.

Sitting on the front row of the stage, d'Arcueil was the very model of placidity, his hands folded neatly in his lap and a look of interest on his face. Since about the time des Paveillons had said "tehvz" instead of using the actual word teraelectronvolt because it read TeVs on the autocue he only rarely paid attention to, the various officials on the riser started fidgeting. The lucky ones on row two or three could furtively stretch but for those on the front row, facing out toward the audience, there was nowhere to hide.

The true price of authority: Having to hide your boredom from the public.

For d'Arcueil though, this was fully worth it. He was smiling and occasionally nodding his way through the grand opening of the Institute for Particle Research. Oberour Ar Moro was going to leap to the forefront of science, and d'Arcueil had been promised on quite a bit of authority that he himself would leap to the forefront of power. Unfortunately, as Minister of Foreign Affairs, he couldn't have direct oversight over the IPR, that honor went to the man currently droning on: Minister of Research Conmore des Paveillons.

The Minister returned sort-of for the fourth time to the purpose of the IPR, which he had a minimal understanding. "The Institute of Particle Research will answer the last fundamental questions of our universe: Dark matter. Antimatter. Neutrino. Ultra...reality...vism." Conmore nodded: Nailed it. While des Paveillons did not quite grasp the purpose of the IPR, or why Collas d'Arcueil was so insistent about the creation of the facility, he can recognize the political implications.

He wasn’t probably going to talk about the huge budget increase for his ministry or how this would inject his name into the press. And goodness knows that was needed. The Ministry of Research was a backwater, constantly at risk of being absorbed by the Ministry of Energy, or Resources, or worse Education. Conmore des Paveillons couldn’t describe what the Ministry actually researched (though he was into minute 35 of not describing what the IPR would describe), he also couldn’t describe how he maintains his fingernail grip on whatever levers of power he could. He still did though.

Stage left of the Minister sat a woman who could describe with great clarity what the IPR would describe. Dr. Caterine Forestier wasn’t born with great wealth or impeccable bloodlines, but with a sharp mind and parents who would go to whatever lengths to lift her to a better life. Despite this, she had still been an obscure academic before the Ministry of Research out-of-the-blue brought her in to discuss her academic paper on particle colliders. That paper was the base matter of the entire IPR, and of it’s most impressive aspect:

HIERATIC, the HIgh EneRgy pArTIcle Collider. A 110-kilometer (16 minutes ago des Paveillons had said it was 100 kilometers) circular particle collider with a potential centre-of-mass collision energy of 147 teraelectronvolts (24 minutes ago des Paveillons had described it as 129 tehvz, which forced Forestier to keep herself from facepalming). HIERATIC was expensive, difficult to fully conceive, and its potential ability to enable a wide physics program might make it truly too complex to really grasp. But if they could grasp it, and Dr. Forestier was determined to, It could advance physics in a heartbeat.

Now they just had to get through this interminable opening so they could truly get to work.

In the audience, a number of attendees had given up entirely on the Minister’s speech. These lesser scientists and engineers and committee staffers had started talking amongst themselves and checking their phones. A younger IPR technician pulled out his phone and pulled up the mobile New Game news app. He clicked on the top story: A preview of Oberour Ar Moro’s forthcoming world cup qualification effort.

The Oberour Ar Moro National Team have been placed in Group 14 as they attempt to qualify for the World Cup finals in Farfadillis and Mriin. Over 26 matchdays across eight months, the Dragoons will cross the globe in their quest. But who will their competition be? Here are the nations you need to know:

Drunk People at the Local Tavern (271)
Matchdays 8 (at the Parade Grounds) and 21 (at Farfa Dillis's or Mriin’s backyard)

Drunk People at the Local Tavern are drunk people at the local tavern. They participated in the most recent Baptism of Fire, where they went 3-1-2 and just missed advancing from their group. Late in qualification the Dragoons will travel to a backyard of one of the drunk people at the local tavern, and play an official football match.

Krytenia (58)
Matchdays 5 (at the Parade Grounds) and 18 (at Harbour Stadium, Stanton)

Krytenia co-Hosted the Baptism of Fire where Oberour Ar Moro entered multiversal football and reached their highest peak thus far. The nation then took in traitor John 't Serclaes. The Dragoon’s matches against Krytenia could be intense, so manager Gilduin Roux may have to focus to keep the team calm.

Lake Esper (243)
Matchdays 13 and 26 (at the Parade Grounds)

With a 3-3-0 record, Lake Esper tied for first in their Baptism of Fire of group. Their tournament then ended in the Round of 32, falling in penalty kicks. These fish out of water could be motivated to make up for their early exit.

Legalese (NR)
Matchdays 11 and 24 (at the Parade Grounds)

Legalese last participated in the qualification for World Cup 79, where they went 1-1-16 and finished last in their group. However, these grandees of multiversal football can never be discounted, and there is guaranteed to be a lot of interest and support for Legalese amongst the casuals.

Newmanistan (46)
Matchdays 6 (at Gladiator Stadium, Olympia) and 19 (at the Parade Grounds)

The Rockets have a lot to prove. They want to break out of their horseshoes-and-hand-grenades rut of only just failing to qualify for the Cup finals. Oberour Ar Moro has never defeated Newmanistan, and that will have to change to have a chance to qualify.

North New South Wales (NR)
Matchdays 1 (at the Parade Grounds) and 14

North New South Wales last participated in qualification for World Cup 80, where they failed to qualify out of their group in Baptism of Fire LXVII, but then performed out of their heads to finish with a solid 6th place in their group in World Cup 80 qualification. They have the real potential to be a stumbling block for any side that overlooks them.

Omerica(96)
Matchdays 3 (at the Parade Grounds) and 16 (at Stephen Reading Memorial Stadium, Christiana, Mespalia)

Before the groups for the qualification were made, those in the know marked down Omerica as the nation in their pot you would least like to see in your group. Well wouldn’t you know? It’s another dangerous side in a group full of them.

Qasden (24)
Matchdays 4 and 17 (at the Parade Grounds)

Qasden feels like a team on the verge of a breakout. But as the second pot team in the group, they’re the side that every team below knows they have to sneak past to qualify. What’s worse it that they surely know it.

Riena (196)
Matchdays 10 (at the Parade Grounds) and 23

Riena reached the semifinals of the most recent Baptism of Fire, and have all the makings of a future great. The Oberour-Riena match at the Parade Grounds could be a thriller.

Saintland (85)
Matchdays 12 (at the Parade Grounds) and 25

Tread carefully, as there are sleeping giants about. Saintland is another nation in this group that has all the possibility of being a powerhouse with a few good bounces of the ball. It will be the job of the Oberours to try and prevent that from happening at our expense this cycle.

Southern Esportivan Union (330)
Matchdays 2 (at Portsmouth Arena, Portsmouth, Lee Islands) and 15 (at the Parade Grounds)

The Union participated in the most recent Baptism of Fire, and we at New Game hope they enjoyed the trip. They, unfortunately, finished sixth in their group with a single victory. The Dragoons will make their first away trip of qualification to Portsmouth with up to 660 Oberours to enjoy their top-of-the-line Portsmouth Arena.

Vilita (1)
Matchdays 9 and 22 (at the Parade Grounds)

The World Cup 68, 77, 81, and 82 winners, and World Cup 84 runners-up, and the best footballing nation in the world at this time. It almost doesn’t require much more to say. It’s almost an anathema to say, but a point in the Dragoons matchday 9 tilt would be a massive accomplishment for Oberour football.

The technician looked up from the article and was shocked to see Conmore des Paveillons was still talking. He had a brief vision of a shepherd’s crook emerging from offstage to yank him aside as if he was in a cartoon.

Offstage, but without a shepherd’s crook, the man who called himself the Comte de Brumes looked out at the men and women on stage and on the floor and toasted himself. It had taken some time to find all the people and all the pieces, but everything was finally in the right place. All that was left was for everything to reach the conclusion he anticipated. The Minister of Research seemed to be doing everything he could to put that off. Oh well. The Comte sipped his drink and then silently toasted his benefactor. Sooner is always better than later, but he could wait. He had nothing but time.

Behind the bored staffers, against the far wall, a young woman with copper hair and piercing blue eyes stared at the stage, trying to take everything in. She recognized some of the faces on the stage, but not all of them. How did they fit? What role were they going to play? Who would be responsible? Who had to be stopped? And how could she?

Kilometers away, completely ignorant of the Institute of Particle Research and the multitude of competing plans and of what role he would play in any of it, Nycollas Mauranghas was being stretched on a trainers table as he listened to Oberour Ar Moro assistant manager Arzhur Janquin give him the good news that he would be the back-up striker for their match against North New South Wales.

by **Eraman** » Sat May 23, 2020 2:56 pm

CHAPTER 1
ANNEXATION OF MITRA AND SOMA

In the third month of the year 74, an election was held in Mitra in which 300 Mitranese were conveniently selected by the pro-Eraman Mitranese and Somanese government voted unanimously by raising their hands to become part of Eraman.

The action caused a huge uproar in Eraman. Protesters gathered in the streets of the capital city, Anara to voice their dissatisfaction. And like a wildfire, the protests spread to all major cities in no time.

"Adding 3 million Mitranese and Somanese to our country will bring us to the brink of a demographic disaster. Eramanian will be a minority in its own land."

"Mitra and Soma suck! Nobody wants to live there."

"In the next election, millions of Mitranese and Somanese will be able to vote and there will be more Mitranese and Somanese representatives to the People's Council. This is wrong."

"Nobody wants to live in Mitra and Soma."

"The annexation of Mitra and Soma is illegal. It's an occupation against the will of Mitranese and Somanese. This is against our values and against our culture. Eraman is better than this."

"They paid me $50 to be here. What's going on?"

Eramanian from all walks of life were united against the annexation of Mitra and Soma albeit for different reasons. The nationalist, the anarchist, the fascist, the anti-fascist, the liberals, the conservatives, the racist, the xenophobic, the feminist, the environmentalist were all there. To protest against the annexation of Mitra and Soma.

But why did Eraman annexed Mitra and Soma?

by **The Grearish Union** » Sat May 23, 2020 3:29 pm

MATCHDAY 1: Qvardax

"Where are we even going, gaffer?" Schaefer had her sighted planted firmly on the window of the chartered airplane that was supposed to take them to Qvardax. She quite liked the window seat. The Baptism of Fire 72 campaign across two nations out of the three that hosted it had made her get onto an airplane for the first time ever, and ever since then she grew this affinity for the window seat, and the rest of the team let the last line of defence have her way - but not Blanchard, and definitely not with this question.

"What do you mean, exactly, Susanna?" Blanchard seemed visibly unimpressed with the situation. It seemed to tug Schaefer uncharacteristically back from her view of the outside world from her window and compelled her to answer. "Qvardax haven't released a roster, or let us know where we are playing, let alone letting us know how to get there." Her reply was firm, with an added shrug at the end like some form of punctuation. She couldn't really make her disappointment any more public for others to see, and some supported it and some didn't. There was an eerie silence that captured the room at that point, until it was broken by Blanchard himself, asking her, "Well, why do you think we are on this plane?" "To go to Qvardax?" was the only reply Schaefer had, more of a guess-like question than a reply, you could say, but we take what we get, perhaps. "This is all you need to know. Let's focus on the game, shall we?" Blanchard's authoritative voice now resonated throughout the chamber, as her turned his back towards the little blackboard on the cabin.

Drawing away on the board, Blanchard could finally see his vision come through. Being a kid born in the blackout, he always believed in the existence of an outside world and an inside history, both of which, he believed, the government was hiding away from the people. Until the revolution happened, and the government changed and the dark clouds of seclusion were raised for Grearia to open itself up to the multiverse. Even then, it took so many years after the Turnover, that one could find out about the Gloriaxian lineage in every Grearish body. "The Gloriaxians were great patriots, I know. If someone were to ask me why I love my motherland so much, I'd blame it on the heritage." Blaanchard chuckled in his own mind when he realised he had finished drawing up the lines of a football pitch on the board. It was time to focus, and that too on a team about whom little was known, except old DVDs and match recordings which would hardly hold any water in the current scenario. Nevertheless, he started placing the magnetic beads on the board to represent his players and the opposition to explain the Grearish tactics for the game. The same old 4-4-2 for the Black Dolphins, versus... "Wait, how would they line up?" The thought troubled him a little. Schaefer did have a point. Yet, it is better to concentrate on yourself than the opposition. He felt he came off too strong with the young goalie, and turning back for a moment, he found Schaefer was still standing.

"I'd appreciate if you sat down, Susanna - you'll need every bit of energy you save." Nobody said a word. It has probably been a while since she was standing. Blanchard smiled and continued, while he motioned again for Schaefer to take her seat.

"This isn't the Baptism of Fire against unranked teams new to the World Cup cycle anymore. This is the real deal itself, it's the World Cup qualifiers against the best in the world, and we gotta buckle up. It wasn't the raging fire back then, just the conducted head from the protection of a pan, but the times have changed, and we're now out of the frying pan, and into the fire!."

by **Jeckland** » Sat May 23, 2020 3:36 pm

ROSS HAILS CONTINUATION OF ‘NEW AGE’

Kayden Ross has declared that his Jeckland team will continue a new age of football in the nation when they begin their World Cup 85 Qualifying campaign in Sajnur.

Ross, 51, was speaking at a press conference shortly before the Jeckish team made their flight to The South Pacific, and spoke highly of his teams achievements thus far as they embarked on their maiden World Cup Qualifying campaign

“The Campionato Esportiva exceeded all expectations - even my own lofty ones.” said Ross, in reference to his target of a quarter final finish before the tournament started. “We played some good football and beat some established teams in Bongo Johnson and Damukuni. The qualifiers a different beast, but we’re looking to carry that momentum forward and put in a good showing.”

When pressed to make a similar prediction, Ross declined to give a positional target, but did set one target. “I’d like for us to play well enough to be invited to the Cup of Harmony. It’s a tournament Jeckland have done well in on the previous occasion we were there, so it’d be good to have another crack at it. It’s going to be hard to make a prediction because there are so many strong teams in this group, including ourselves.”

“There are some teams from other pots that are very strong compared to the pool of nations that could have been drawn - but that includes ourselves. I’d imagine most of our opponents weren’t too pleased to draw the 4th placed team from the Campionato Esportiva from the bottom seeds.”

Ross’ assertion about the difficulty of the group looks to be a fair assessment. Top seeds Turori and second seeds Audioslavia are some of the most successful teams in World Cup history, and both made the round of 16 in the previous cycle. Third seeds New Lusitana also suffered a round of 16 exit, in their case in the Cup of Harmony after coming third in their qualifying group. Tomorrow’s opponents Sajnur and sixth seeds TJUN-ia both failed to get out of Group F in that tournament, with the fifths seeds Eura Oceanian Territories failing to pass Group G. The rest of the group is made up of returning nation Natanians and Nosts, who Jeckland beat in the Campionato Esportiva, four nations from the recent Baptism of Fire headlined by the dangerous Muradil, and Astograth, a nation steeped in World Cup history who will surely defy their tenth seeding. A competitive group could make or break this inexperienced squad - and the upcoming away day will be an indicator of which of those is likely to happen.

FANTASY WORLD CUP QUALIFIERS - AS PICKED BY MY MUM

World Cup Qualifiers are nearly upon us, and as such a new fantasy football game has launched from Ko-oren. Players are asked to pick one team from each group to accrue points, with ‘prices’ of teams based on their KPB rankings. Now, I could make a team myself, with well reasoned points and tips for what nations could be bargains. But fantasy football never works the way you intend it to, and often it feels like you may as well have let your mum, who knows next to nothing about football, pick the team for you. So that’s exactly what I’m going to do…

MUM’S FANTASY PICKS

GROUP 1 - JECKLAND (0 KPB)

Firstly, and not surprisingly, Mum’s gone for Jeckland as her Group 1 pick. “I’ve got to back the boys, plus we were good at the Campy Esportiva.” That was actually decent reasoning, Mum

GROUP 2 - DRAWKLAND (19.59 KPB)

Group 2 brings a pot 2 pick in Drawkland. The reasoning? “Their name ends in kland just like us” Any hope I had from that first pick is gone.

GROUP 3 - SAVOJARNA (13.15 KPB)

A popular pick in the game for their footballing skills, it’s the “snazzy kits” that make this pick for Mum. Maybe a good one but for a bad reason.

GROUP 4 - TAESHAN (30.17 KPB)

One of her big budget picks. What made her part ways with so much money for this one? “I like purple” Margaret help us.

GROUP 5 - ZWANGZUG (21.32 KPB)

“Funny name” - Has she actually gotten bored? We’re a third of the way through Mum!

GROUP 6 - LISANDER (9 KPB)

A middling pick, made because “I had a feeling they were going to do well. I think they’ll qualify.” A bold prediction, let’s see if Mumstradamus is correct.

GROUP 7 - DELACLAVA (0 KPB)

Was this inspired looking pick due to their history in the World Cup? Actually - sort of “I heard you talking about them so I thought they must be good.” Some logic at last, however frail.

GROUP 8 - KO-OREN (28.09 KPB)

“They made the game, so they’re probably a big nation” - yes Mum, their 28 KPB would indicate that. But I’m not entirely sure she understands the price system.

GROUP 9 - KELSSEK (18.33 KPB)

The rumoured Cup of Harmony hosts are my Mum’s next pick, but despite doing these picks just five minutes before I spoke to her, she “can’t remember” why she did this one.

GROUP 10 - ELECTRUM (0 KPB)

Another amazing looking pick, made because “their flag has an arse on it”. Unbelievable.

GROUP 11 - HUELAVIA (24.58 KPB)

Another decently expensive pick. “I don’t know what it was about them, but they just stood out to me.” When I suggest it may be the capital letters, she replies “Yeah, probably.”

[b[GROUP 12 - ZETA REKA AND HUGELTALDOM (2 KPB)[/b]

A promising up and coming team is picked, for one of the more unique reasons here - “Their name is so long, the other team will get bored.” High IQ there, Mum.

GROUP 13 - MAVINET (1.64 KPB)

The name theme continues here, with Mavinet picked because “they can hit the back of the net - geddit”. I think I’m going to put you in a home, mother.

GROUP 14 - KRYTENIA (12.88 KPB)

Krytenians will be happy to hear they got picked for a footballing reason - but less so when they hear what it is “I heard they always lose in the semifinals - so they must be quite good to get there”. It seems tales of Krytenian woe even reach non football fans. Sorry.

GROUP 15 - FILINDOSTAN (14.29 KPB)

Rounding off with one of the better reasons for a pick, that being “they hosted the Campionato Esportiva”. I’m actually surprised she knows that.

I was planning to do a breakdown with her at the end, explaining to her that she should perhaps spend the rest of her budget, but the soul has been sucked out of me by her answers. So I think I’ll just go to bed.

Prologue

“You nervous?”

What a dumb fucking question, Mum. No seriously, are you fucking stupid? Of course I’m nervous, you moron. This is the biggest moment of my life. You know how much this means to me.

That’s what I thought. But of course that’s not what I said.

“Yeah”

But despite me just saying one word, Mum read every line of my thought and said no more. She knew me that well.

My mind drifted away from the present and to the past. All the work I’d put in to make it this far. All the hardship that had come with it. And as always, in times like these, I thought of Dad.

46 years old. Fit as a fiddle. He’d always kept fit, always played football down at the local pitches. Wednesday night training under the lights, Sunday matches. Ever since he’d moved to Baquerry, he’d been on those pitches twice a week, through sunshine and storms. Ate well, ran once a week on top of the football. It made what had happened all the more perplexing, all the harder to understand.

Life is cruel, but it has a special hatred for me it seems. I learnt that lesson that fateful morning, where my mother’s cries alerted me to what I could not have seen coming. A cardiac arrest. He was dead.

The post mortem told us he’d had the heart condition since birth, but the screening processes that now pick these things up didn’t exist back then. Doing what he loved, playing football, had been risking his life the whole time. But even if he’d known, I’m not sure he would have given a damn, such was his love for the game.

“We’re here.”

I snapped back to the real world, where Mum had guided the car into a parking spot. I stepped out of the car and looked up to the sky. “I hope this makes you proud, Dad” I said under my breath, before walking away from Mum and the car.

by **Krytenia** » Sat May 23, 2020 3:40 pm

Contenders? Ready!
By Rami Niblick in Ashton

WOULD you look at the time, it's World Cup O'Clock already! The wait for the latest instalment of football's greatest recurring drama is almost over, and there's a bumper crop of episodes this time around. Just under two hundred teams will compete over a record twenty-six matchdays, with the goal to be in the final thirty-two.

Krytenia, ranked just inside the top sixty, are hopeful rather than confident of their chances. New boss Jerome Jaffacake-Phillips and able assistant Paul Davis have made bold statements about a new, more attacking Dragons side; they'll finally get the chance to put that policy into practice in the nation's most south-westerly outpost. Ashton's Rutian Grounds, with a capacity of just over 50,000, promises to be a cauldron of noise - a cauldron that helped Olympic to their first ever title last season.

Their opponents in this endeavour will be Omerica. Like Krytenia, they came close but not close enough to qualifying for World Cup LXXXIII - indeed the Incorrigibles and Dragons were in the same group - before falling off a cliff last time out. Both sides appear, then, to be coming from the same place psychologically, which could make for an interesting game. Certainly, Jaffacake-Phillips has said he's not going to leave anything to chance.

The challenge is laid bare in front of the men in sky blue and white, and the mission is clear. Keep the faith, keep the wins ticking over, and make a date in Farfadillis - or Mriin - for the eighty-fifth World Cup Sweepstakes. Onward!

by **Ancherion** » Sat May 23, 2020 3:56 pm

What's this the Ancherion team are still trying there best? After an abysmal showing at the 26th edition of Campionato Esportiva, where we finished 5th in a group of 6 with a record of 1-2-2? To make it worse De Mequites has picked the same squad again and basically hoping for the same outcome, since there really hasn't been any domestic games to base off between the two tournaments, I am sure some people would have made the drop and replaced by fresher faces who didn't experience the regional tournament but what can we say about this now after it is all done and submitted. Just hope for the best.

Anyways, Ancherion are back for World Cup 85 after a slight scare that was being the Paradisians separating the national team to return Boring Paradise on the international scale however was denied, but they won't stop pushing here. We might see them come back in the future still. The Ancherion team were seeded within the 4th pot, seems decent as we have been gradually climbing the ranks and are now currently within the top 60 of the multiverse.

As the group draw went on we were put into Group 11 with the nations like Equestria, HUElavia, Nooooooooooo, Xanneria, Kandorith, Vdara, Fujai and a few other smaller unknown nations. This group also has a return an old nation called the Blouman Empire, however the Paradisians have never played them before so this a completely new experience. In other news we have played Equestria before on five separate occasions, the first occasion being after the 69th World Cup Qualifying is the 3rd edition of the Runners Cup where they hosted, we reached the quarter final only to lose 2-0 to them. After that the paradisians met in World Cup 73 Qualifying as we had two close games, 3-2 at home and a 3-4 away. Further on as Ancherion we played in the 82nd World Cup Qualifying which was 4-3 win at home and a 2-5 loss away. Judging from our record as if history repeats itself, we should be able to win at home with 3 goals and lose the away leg. HUElavia are an opponent we played in the 75th World Cup Qualifying when they were small and not the beast they are now with a 3-1 and 1-0 display, they are probably looking for revenge if they can even remember those days. We have played Xanneria once before in the 75th Cup of Harmony in which it was a close 3-4 loss. Kandorith have been a team that has also ruined our chances of qualifying, back in 73rd Qualifying we lost 0-1 both legs and then in the 82nd edition we lost 1-3 and 5-6. We are definitely looking to get at least some points off them this time. Overall we hope that the Ancherions and Paradisians can make a challenge for qualification this cycle. With only the top two qualifying, it will be a hard challenge but something we can do. A few upsets will set us straight for it but honestly speaking a 3rd place finishing is a good finish for us and should not kick ourselves if we don't qualify.

by **95X** » Sat May 23, 2020 4:03 pm

A New Tournament; A Roster Update

The 95X National Team handled four retirements since AOCAF 60, 29-year-old reserve defender Savannah Onethirtysix decided to hang it up, 29-year-old reserve midfielder Kimberly Dlihc retired amidst a highly-talented young midfield, and married starting defenders Chaya Concord-Fourteenth and Rhiannon Concord-Fourteenth announced they're devoting their undivided attention to being full-time parents to their new children.

This pushed 25-year-old utility reserve Zedex Sinclair and 24-year-old Emily Detroit into the starting lineup as they were the most ready for the nod.

Joining the 95X National Team for their first tournaments are three new defenders; Jemma Dudley, Sadie Twohundredthree, and Mya/Aym Gonzylyz. The latter may seem quite unique to opponents as they're conjoined twins, the two share a waist yet each twin has legs where most people would have arms. This may sound odd to everyone else, but not to them obviously.

Yet the player on the mind of most 95Xers is Sarah Foureleven, daughter of 95X legend Xi (pronounced "Eleven") Foureleven. She's coming off the feelings from being part of the tournament-winning Volleyball World Expo team and hoping for good luck in both her team being successful as well as getting off the bench and into the starting lineup while dealing with her rival Antara Northtown, who has the same ambition for the same starting lineup position.

by **Omerica** » Sat May 23, 2020 4:12 pm

blogdefootball.co.or
All the football news that’s fit to print!

The Most Mind-Numbingly Drawn-Out Qualification Campaign Ever: A Preview, Part One
By Anastasia Saint-Martin

“There but for the grace of God, and all that. Omerica have fallen further than us in recent cycles, and now find themselves in a very tricky group. The Dragons will need to proceed with caution against a potentially dangerous opponent, but on paper should have enough to collect a maximum six points.”
— Group Fourteen, A Pinsticker’s Guide

Don’t you just hate it when Kryties talk sense? I know I do.

It’s bollocks like this that will be the only constant in what will be the most torturous World Cup qualification campaign Omerica have ever had the misfortune to face. This is a qualifying group that promises to beat us down week after week until we’re left begging for it to stop, only to find out that we still have months to go. If I didn’t know any better, I would say that this qualification format had been personally devised by Satan to make everyone beg for the day that some team finally wins football as part of his personal vendetta against all forms of participatory geometry.

It is a campaign that is so eye-wateringly long, I’ve had to break this preview up into two parts just to get any of it out on time! So without further ado, here are the first six teams who will get the chance to demonstrate to the United Republican Soccer Federation the futility of their endeavours.

Krytenia
Previous meetings: 0–2 defeat @ Busukuma, Banija (World Cup 83 playoffs)
Home game: Matchday 14 @ Stephen Reading Memorial Stadium, Christiana
Away game: Matchday 1 @ Rutian Grounds, Ashton

This will not be the first time Omerica play in Krytenia, nor the first time Omerica play Krytenia, but it will be the first time Omerica play Krytenia in Krytenia. Confused yet?

The Gryphons had three games in the Atlantian Oceanian republic during the 64th Cup of Harmony, where they drew both Bears Armed and Szavoda 3–3 before crashing out in the group stage after a 1–0 loss to the Sarian, leading to the unceremonious defenestration of James-Alexandre Christopherson. But it would be more than two decades, four managers and one football association later before the Omerican national team—now rechristened “the Incorrigibles”—finally faced the perennial bridesmaids of AOCAF.

It ended horribly. A packed Lukwago Field witnessed an already-eliminated Omerican side get played off the pitch by a vastly superior Krytenian team, ending one of the most dire campaigns of the World Cup 83 qualifying playoffs. Now, after an administrative cock-up forced the Incorrigibles to sit out the previous World Cup qualifiers, Omerica’s first qualifying match after that comedic tragedy is of course against the very team that tore off Red Bolton’s testicles and ate them for breakfast and—as if URSF President Casimir Paquet himself cut off a witch doctor in traffic in a past life—it wouldn’t be an Omerican qualifying campaign if it didn’t start away from home.

Despite being led by the heir of the infamous Jeremy Jaffacake for some bizarre reason, Krytenia will rightfully have ideas far above their station. These players do not know the meaning of the word “defence” and will take their challenge for the finals all the way down to the last matchday. Expect to be thoroughly spanked in Ashton, then humiliated at La Corona’s stomping grounds.

Either that or we may be completely wrong and the Kryties have the structural integrity of wet bog roll. Also, we think Martin Wallander may be part dog.

Prediction: Two Krytenian victories, two degrading Incorrigible thrashings.

Newmanistan
Previous meetings: none
Home game: Matchday 2 @ Stade Just-Cartier, Charlottesville
Away game: Matchday 15 @ McAllister Stadium, Putnam Lake

Reigning champions of the multiverse’s worst regional confederation and holders of a title that somehow competes to be more meaningless than “Independent Associations Championship winners”, Newmanistan will come into the campaign with a sense that they might have a chance to win it all.

While Lucifer personally kills a kitten any time an Esportivan team wins anything, Newmanistan actually have a significant non-zero chance to survive this horrific bloodbath of a qualifying group. And even if they don’t, they’re certainly one of the favourites to lift the Cup of Harmony. These Newmanistani players look like they’re ready to break your neck if you so much as look at them the wrong way and, though it would make perfect sense for them to play a bone-shattering Karelan-style defence that would make angels weep, the Rockets actually play a fairly attack-oriented game that George Kostas’s side are unlikely to outmatch.

This is a team with, arguably, a lot more to prove than Omerica and they will certainly play like it. It will be the first time the Incorrigibles play the Rockets and, by the end of it, they will probably be praying that it’s the last.

Prediction: Two rocket-powered spankings.

Oberour Ar Moro
Previous meetings: 2–3 defeat @ Regium, Oberour Ar Moro (international friendly)
Home game: Matchday 18 @ Stephen Reading Memorial Stadium, Christiana
Away game: Matchday 3 @ Parade Grounds, Regium

Well, we appreciate the flattery. Of course, calling the Incorrigibles the team from Pot 6 “you would least like to see in your group” is about the most meaningless platitude you could bestow upon this team, especially given the Omerican propensity to perform like we’re three or four pots lower in the rankings than we actually are.

Helmed by Gilduin Roux, Oberour Ar Moro will have a deep talent pool to draw on for the qualifiers, even if they’re probably playing to be crowned Best of the Rest in this Group of Death title-contender. Yet another team that absolutely outdoes the attack of George Kostas’s side with their peculiar 4–3–3(?) formation that has their “sweepers” push forward to midfield rather than their wide backs when shifting to a more attacking tack, this Dominion demonstrated how superior they are at the attacking game in an international friendly on their own home turf. Quite coincidentally, of Omerica’s current World Cup qualifying opponents, Oberour Ar Moro are the only one that Omerica have played at their own home ground previously.

Fished out of the middle of Pot 7, we would not be surprised if Oberour Ar Moro managed to pip Omerica to sixth place and knock Pot 5 opposition Saintland down a peg or two. They certainly have quality and are a mint diamond in the rough in this rough qualifying marathon group.

Prediction: Defeat at the Parade Grounds, followed by a humbling draw in Mespalia.

Drunk People at the Local Tavern
Previous meetings: none
Home game: Matchday 4 @ Stade Just-Cartier, Charlottesville
Away game: Matchday 17… in someone’s bloody backyard? ಠ_ಠ

It wouldn’t be an international football tournament without some insane twits insanely flying the insane banner of an insane nation with a nonsensical name.

Now while it may not best the likes of “Hot Skitty on Wailord Action” for the title of most ridiculous name of an opponent we’ve ever faced, the actual team itself soundly bests the Hot Skitties for the most preposterous the Incorrigibles have ever had the pleasure to play. I would almost consider Drunk People at the Local Tavern to be an inspiration to every daft nitwit who thinks they could outdo such world-class teams as, say, Vilita. These people are absolutely magnificent for their testicular fortitude and for that, we commend ye.

I would presume that drunk people would be child’s play to beat at footy, but for all we know, the alcohol they serve at this tavern gives anyone who drinks it superhuman powers. Almost as if it’s spiked with Cocoa-bo… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Excuse me, but I have some Frosties to write to…

Prediction: Your next World Cup champions.

Vilita
Previous meetings: none
Home game: Matchday 18 @ Stephen Reading Memorial Stadium, Christiana
Away game: Matchday 5 @ TBA, TBA

Oh… This is awkward.

There’s really nothing to say about world number one team Vilita that hasn’t already been said.

Now excuse me while I go submit my chocolate mocha latte order at the local Cocoa-bo…

Prediction: Two turbo-charged defeats with a side of bowel cleansing.

Riena
Previous meetings: none
Home game: Matchday 6 @ Stade Just-Cartier, Charlottesville
Away game: Matchday 19 @ Wavelet Arena, Nagato

The first member of the latest Baptism of Fire class Omerica will have the privilege to take on, Riena made it nearly all the way. Semifinalists at that tournament, they were incredibly unlucky to have walked away without medals to show for their efforts.

I really want to make a series of snide jokes at our expense, but I feel like it would be disrespectful to a potential future giant of the game. Riena play a fluid, balanced style not unlike that which Anne-Sophie Groothuis deployed during her time in the dugouts of 28 Mars and the Incorrigibles. The team prefer a wide and short-passing game to lobbing the ball forward and praying for the best, which served them incredibly well in a romp to the top of Group F. If any of the Baptism of Fire crop have to watched out for—beside the likes of Tequilo or Zeta Reka and Hugeltaldom—it’s Riena.

Rumours that the United Republican Soccer Federation might set up a beach soccer pitch on the Charlottesville promenade currently remain unconfirmed.

Prediction: Victory in Charlottesville, followed by a valiant victory for the home side in Nagato.

Next time
Five teams we might actually stand half a chance against. And Qasden. ◇

Uniting Omerican sport fans across the United Republics — blogdefootball: a proud member of the Gryphon Pride network

United Republican Soccer Federation
6 Jacques la Rouge Road
Port Alexandre, MS 18-A40
UNITED REPUBLICS OF OMERICA
Omerica 0–2 Kriegiersien
Independent Associations Championship 9 group stage — Matchday Three
Estadio Porto, Portimao, Huelavia
Goalscorers: (none); Raphaël Martin 10’, 80’ (og)
Omerica lineup (4–3–3): Jean-Robert Tosi; Felix Zanetti – Raphaël Martin – Noah Clement – Jodie Barton; Thom Magalhães – Jessica Bennett – Alphonse Fontaine (captain); Adélaïde Argyris – Jean-François Fernand – Anaïs Cabral
Substitutions: Martin > Aristide de Felice (81’)

United Republican Soccer Federation
6 Jacques la Rouge Road
Port Alexandre, MS 18-A40
UNITED REPUBLICS OF OMERICA
Krytenia v Omerica
World Cup 85 qualifying group stage — Matchday One
Rutian Grounds, Ashton, Krytenia
Omerica lineup (4–3–3): Jean-Robert Tosi; Felix Zanetti – Raphaël Martin – Noah Clement – Jodie Barton; Thom Magalhães – Jessica Bennett – Alphonse Fontaine (captain); Adélaïde Argyris – Jean-François Fernand – Anaïs Cabral

by **Chromatika** » Sat May 23, 2020 4:38 pm

Chromatik City Courier
Jordan Lawless, Sports Columnist

Group 3 Preview: A First Look at Chromatika's Opponents

Welcome, one and all, to World Cup 85! Hosted in Farfadillis and Mriin (two countries whom we are glad to not see until the World Cup Proper for sure as Chromatiks), the Anomalies will have to endure a twenty-six matchday marathon to qualify. With 15 groups of 13 nations, only the top two will qualify, leaving a total of 165 nations disappointed afterwards.

When the news came that Chromatika was slated in Group 3, all the questions followed: Who are their opponents? Whom should the Chromatik fans make a note of in the group? Is it a tough group? Let's take a look, shall we? First, with the six nations that Chromatika will be warring with to get the qualification berths:

(3) EURA
KPB Points: 45.78
WC 84: 4th
WC Accolades: Champions - WC 66, WC 73, Runner-Up - WC 60, 72 78
Previous Matches with Chromatika: (0-0-1)
Chromatika 2-3 Eura, WC 79 Proper Matchday 1
Analysis: The #3 team in the world, Eura was one of the hardest opponents for the Chromatiks to face from Pot 1. That being said, the two nations have only ever played each other once - and that was six cycles ago. Expect the Blue-and-Gold to reign supreme in both matches with the Chromatiks, but for the Anomalies to use them as a true measuring stick to see just how far the Evans/Everdeen project has come, and how much it has to go before it reaches the status of world-class. With both matches against the Eurans happening in the middle of the qualifying legs, the matches also serve as a litmus test to see how the team has been truly doing.

(45) TERRE SEPTENTRIONALE
KPB Points: 14.73
WC 84: 6th, Group 2 (7-7-6)
WC Accolades: Runner-Up, CoH 76
Previous Matches with Chromatika: None
Analysis: An intriguing opponent from Pot 3, one that the Chromatiks have never faced. With the matches against Terre Septentrionale happening at the beginning of each leg, it'll definitely set a tone - a reason why the CFF has decided to make the opening match be hosted in the Capitalizt Dome, given its significance. Chromatika will look to take every point against this opponent.

(56) SAVOJARNA
KPB Points: 13.15
WC 84: 7th, Group 11 (6-6-8)
WC Accolades: None
Previous Matches with Chromatika: (1-1-0)
Chromatika 2-2 Savojarna, WC 81 Qualifying Matchday 8
Chromatika 3-1 Savojarna, WC 81 Qualifying Matchday 17
Analysis: One of the rising nations who are not too far away from making a daring run, the Savojars will definitely not be a nation to look over. Despite having a 1-1-0 record against them in the past, Savojar brand as a whole continues to grow. A dark horse candidate to qualify, should Eura and Chromatika fall.

(70) ESHAN
KPB Points: 10.18
WC 84: 5th, Group 15 (8-8-4)
WC Accolades: None
Previous Matches with Chromatika: (2-1-1)
Chromatika 0-1 Eshan, WC 73 Qualifying Matchday 6
Chromatika 0-0 Eshan, WC 73 Qualifying Matchday 13
Chromatika 3-2 Eshan, WC 79 Qualifying Matchday 6
Chromatika 3-2 Eshan, WC 79 Qualifying Matchday 15
Analysis: One of Chromatika's Atlantian Oceanian neighbors, the teams have faced each other four times, but all before World Cup 80. A team to be wary of, at least.

(95) THE SARIAN
KPB Points: 8.12
WC 84: 8th, Group 3 (5-6-9)
WC Accolades: None
Previous Matches with Chromatika: None.
Analysis: Another up-and-comer who'll be looking to cause some upsets.

(134) NORTHWEST KALACTIN
KPB Points: 4.80
WC 84: 7th, Group 7 (7-3-10)
WC Accolades: None
Previous Matches with Chromatika: (2-0-0)
Chromatika 2-1 Northwest Kalactin, WC 84 Qualifying Matchday 7
Chromatika 3-0 Northwest Kalactin, WC 84 Qualifying Matchday 18
Analysis: For the second cycle in a row, Northwest Kalactin will be in the group with Chromatika. Last cycle, they had no issues, but they will have to be careful this time as well.

With the other six nations being such that Chromatika has never played, it is indeed Terre Septentrionale and Savojarna that the Chromatiks will have to watch out for in this long marathon of qualifying.

Chromatika to Use More than One Stadium for Host Venue

For the first time ever, Chromatika will have more than one stadium host their guests during their home matches. United Center in Urrheddiao, RCK Field in Alnio, The Island Dome in Myana, The Cove in Lhor, Z'ai'ai Field in Z'ai'ai, The Tidal Wave in Tihon, and the trio of stadiums in Chromatik City - Chromatk City Field, Anomaly Tower, and the Capitalizt Dome itself - will be used to host matches.

"It is an exciting day for Chromatiks," stated Premier Keri Wyse Aart in an exclusive interview, "It is about time that we showed the world more than just Chromatik City. I challenge each city to take the responsibility of hosting very seriously and to show the character of their city to our international visitors."

The Capitalizt Dome will host the first match against Terre Septentrionale, but Urrheddiao, Myana, Alnio, and Lhor will also host matches during the first leg.

Projected Lineup vs. Terre Septentrionale: Ria; Xiao - de Aea - Will - Ilya; Armageddon - Dias; Victoriane - Mora - Dragana; Andisori (C).

by **Independent Athletes from Quebec** » Sat May 23, 2020 4:39 pm

The RQFA Announces the WCQ home games list, Selects 10 Stadiums

Francesco Varela González

RENEEGRAD, CAPITALE-NATIONALE - In the immediate hours following the 2044 World Cup 85 qualifying draw, the Royal Quebecois Football Association had announced their list of fixtures for their home games for the course of the qualifying tournament. After much deliberation, which included careful adjustments of the venue choices to avoid possible stoking of region-to-region sentiments, the RQFA were able to decide on the matter. The Grim Reapers, on their first World Cup qualifying round since 2024 when they barely survived the playoffs to make the World Cup 76 held in Ceni and Electrum, will be facing off against The Andromedan Islands, Brenecia, Crystalline Caverns, Damukuni, Emastalia, Filindostan, Grearia, Poafmersia, Qvardax, Reçueçn, Revatnagar and Shokpos in what should be an extremely long qualifying cycle that should run for a full year.

Previously, the RQFA had announced that there is a preliminary list of 14 stadiums ahead of the qualifying draw. On the updated list, ten stadiums were chosen out of them. All the chosen stadiums, barring last-minute alterations, will be expected to host one national team match, except The Reneegrad in Quebec City and The Samseongoloondongjang in Montreal, which will host two matches. Given the particular significance of those two stadiums, they will be hosting the top four seeds of the group- The Reneegrad will host the Grim Reapers' first WCQ match in eighteen years against fourth seed Filindostan and will also face the entrance of top seed Brenecia on MD21. The Samseongoloondongjang will host the second seed Reçueçn to conclude the first half of qualifying, and will also host third seed Damukuni on MD24. As for rest of the World Cup qualifying stage, Attawapiskat, Halifax, Iqaluit, Kingston, Ottawa, Prince Eric, St. John's and Winnipeg will also host a match each to their own strengths and weaknesses.

The 10 stadiums selected in the RQFA Home Match List were mostly straightforward choices, as they were usually placed in the . Still, it is good to note that there were some notable omissions to be made. While being heavy favourites to start off, neither Apple Bowl in Chicoutimi nor The Steelyard in Rimouski were considered. In the press conference held in the RQFA Office in Quebec City, RQFA President Hong Jeong-Nam stated that both the Steelyard and Apple Bowl were deemed ineligible for the course of this World Cup qualifying cycle, as the stadiums themselves are considered too much of safety hazard for the RQFA to accommodate visiting fans, however little the numbers of tickets they may be assigned towards. Also taken out of equation were The Doomsday Arena in Gotham, Terra Henrius, and California City Memorial Coliseum in the southwestern tip of the nation. While no one was surprised about the omission of The Doomsday Arena in Gotham, the CCMC's omission was much more of a sudden and contingent situation. The 104,800-seater, which hosted the Quebecois national team's return tour match against Delaclava just two months earlier, saw a couple of on-turf injuries due to the certain multipurpose stadium's use of astroturf, which caused the RQFA to withdraw its name from the pool, out of protests by the players themselves. In its place, the VisitMB.que Arena in Prince Eric, northwestern Manitoba, was selected.

As the Grim Reapers' first qualifying campaign since the uninterrupted half-decade of World Cup participation, the qualifying campaign was more decentralised than in previous years, when a set of three or four stadiums were used. This had meant that some major itinerary changes and travel plans had to be devised accordingly. First, due to the particular nature associated with travel for the Grim Reapers this qualifying campaign, the Quebecois national team will be flying on its plane for all its travels outside of Quebec City. For this purpose, a B787-9 plane bought by the RQFA back in 2035 will be used for all travel's sake, as opposed to a B777-200LR that was used in the Grim Reapers' heydays. The B777-200LR is since then home to the Hotel. In the situation where the RQFA aircraft may not be available, however, the RQFA will arrange alternate transportation, which will involve chartered train services for short-range (Chicoutimi, Ottawa, Montreal) and mid-range routes (Kingston, Halifax), while the rest will involve chartered services with the Royal Quebecois Air Force.

The RQFA will open its ticket sales for the qualifying opener against Filindostan this Friday. The modes of reservation will be both available in person at The Reneegrad, where 4500 tickets will be sold once the ticket office opens at 09:30, while 9,000 seats will be sold online, at http://www.rqfa.que/booking, at 17:30. Three hundred and sixty tickets will also be reserved for the national team, its staff and its family members.

As for the remainder of the home matches, the reservation details will be announced in due time.

ROYAL KINGDOM OF QUEBEC GRIM REAPERS - 2044 WORLD CUP 85 QUALIFYING STAGE - HOME MATCH LIST

MD1 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Filindostan (50) - The Reneegrad, Quebec City, Capitale-Nationale (Capacity: 94,860)
MD3 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Shokpos (330) - Leith Park, Halifax, Acadie (Capacity: 28,740)
MD5 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Revatnagar (338) - City of Attawapiskat Stadium, Attawapiskat, Northwest (Capacity: 40,120)
MD7 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Emastalia (UR) - The Charterhouse, Ottawa, Outaouais (Capacity: 33,150)
MD10 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Qvardax (264) - VisitMB.que Arena, Prince Eric, Manitoba (Capacity: 29,563)
MD12 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Reçueçn (28) - The Samseongoloondongjang, Montreal, Montreal (Capacity: 85,320)

MD15 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Poafmersia (71) - Iqaluit Stadium, Iqaluit, Nunavut (Capacity: 123,880)
MD17 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. The Andromeda Islands (134) - Blue Point Stadium, St. John's, Newfoundland (Capacity: 64,850)
MD19 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Crystalline Caverns (91) - OVO Field, Kingston, Frontenac (Capacity: 30,460)
MD21 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Brenecia (13) - The Reneegrad, Quebec City, Capitale-Nationale (Capacity: 94,860)
MD24 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. Damukuni (44) - The Samseongoloondongjang, Montreal, Montreal (Capacity: 85,320)
MD26 : Independent Athletes from Quebec vs. The Grearish Union (212) - Winnipeg Coliseum, Winnipeg, Manitoba (Capacity: 65,430)

by **Zwangzug** » Sat May 23, 2020 4:42 pm

This is the first RP cutoff of the qualifiers! (For groups 9-15.) Good luck to all teams, and enjoy the journey.

Scores are here.

by **Delaclava** » Sat May 23, 2020 4:52 pm

A guide to Delaclava's World Cup qualifying campaign

International competition is upon us once again, as Delaclava begins their quest to qualify for the 85th World Cup, which will be hosted in the northern neighboring nation of Mriin and the western Atlantian Oceanian country of Farfadillis. The campaign starts today as Delaclava travels to Woodstock to play Sarzonia at Dave Wilson Stadium. Read on for what you need to know before you tune in for the opening kickoff:

The Phoenixes have experienced some up and down form: In their return to international football, Delaclava traveled to Krytenia for the AOCAF tournament and walked out with only a draw against Cosumar.

Moving on west to Qasden, they continued their winless run by losing their first two matches of Wonder Cup and being eliminated from winning the tournament. The double-elimination consolation bracket of the format gave the eliminated teams an opportunity for growth, and Delaclava capitalized more than anyone, winning the next four matches in regulation and a fifth in penalty kicks to take home the Moon Bracket. While only good for 9th place, the finish promised to give the Phoenixes some much-desired momentum.

Since then, Delaclava has played seven friendlies to a record of 1-6, including losing the last five matches. Besides a 5-2 home loss to Ethane, none of those defeats were truly embarrassing, and one could argue that these matches were more casual and experimental, but it's hardly confidence-building form.

The question remains - which squad will show up: the one that went on a five-game win streak, or the one that suffered a five-game loss streak?

Players to watch out for: With more and more eyes watching the Delaclava team, midfielder Rhydian Campbell has captured the attention of viewers and pundits more than anyone else. Initially a reserve on the AOCAF squad, the 18-year-old's game blossomed when he signed with New Capetown Falcons of Taeshan and led them from a relegation standing to eighth place in the table, earning a nod for the Best XI in the process. He simultaneously worked his way into the starting lineup and was instrumental in the Wonder Cup win streak, including scoring the winning penalty kick against Indusse.

Manager Tim Landers even introduced a new, more offensive-minded, 3-4-3 formation so he could feature both attacking midfielders Campbell and Donato Girardi in the lineup. Girardi himself is a talented playmaker and an effective on-field leader of this team.

Forwards Lukas Meyer and Dashaun Howard are natural and opportunistic scorers who figure to play a prominent role for a squad with a philosophy that the best defense is a good offense. But the Phoenixes aren't lacking for defensive talent - goalkeeper George Ross was the driving force behind the team's performance in Qasden, allowing just one goal in five matches.

There are some new faces on the team... This squad has seven players who are entering their first international tournament. Five have previously capped with the Verceolan national football team - goalkeeper Jared Thompson, midfielders Gunnar Sash and Quentin Bard, and forwards Ryan Walters and Declan Mullins. They were a part of a group of eight Verceolan veterans who were called up during the Wonder Cup to provide experience and guidance, yet with the opportunity to work their way into the lineup. None of these players saw action or even suited up in that tournament, but through their practice and friendly performance, they have been deemed worthy of joining the permanent squad for the World Cup campaign.

Defender Brent Ritchie and midfielder Jesse Bates also put on the red-and-gold kits for the first time to round up the team of 23.

...and other players say good-bye - some for good: Six players who were on the original AOCAF squad have been dropped from the lineup - none saw significant time during competition. The most surprising demotions are midfielder Kazuo Martin and forward Erik Hovhannisyan, two 18-year-old prospects who got the most time of the bunch and looked quite promising at times. But with the usual starters in the front seven as well as Verceolan veterans who were chosen for their experience, there simply wasn't enough room for them.

Their time is likely still to come - as is likely the case for goalkeeper Tyron Young, defender Carlos Berrera, midfielder Cael McBride, and forward Eddie Roberts. Even Roberts, the oldest of this group at 26, has improved significantly over the past two years and will be waiting in the wings for his chance.

In addition, three Verceolan vets were not selected to join the permanent World Cup squad - all three defenders in Jeff Becker, Craig Xanthis, and Matt Reich. Becker, 40, and Xanthis, 39, have likely seen their last chance slip away, while Reich, at 34, may still have a few good years left to win a spot in the future.

The Phoenixes start with an old rivalry: As previously mentioned, Delaclava's first match comes against our Cyanean neighbors, the Sarzonia Stars. These teams have already gotten acquainted recently, as the Stars came to Germaine Stadium for a friendly which also served as the dedication match of the stadium to the late Michelle Germaine, a footballing legend both as a domestic league player and as manager of The Babbage Islands for a lengthy tenure which included a World Cup Final appearance. The Stars stole the 2-1 victory, and the Phoenixes look for revenge as they head to Woodstock.

The opening fixture was actually scheduled to take place in Catherina, but the two football associations agreed to switch the fixtures. The reason? Dave Wilson Stadium, as well as much of Sarzonian daily life and culture, is ready to re-open after the successful management of a viral outbreak, for which Delaclav scientists provided research and medical assistance. The game will serve to welcome allies to the stadium for its re-opening, as well as to honor those who worked tirelessly to resolve a health crisis.

The pre-match mood will undoubtedly be nothing but cordial. But when the opening whistle blows, get ready for an intense battle. Both teams want to start off on the right foot, and neither side is prepared to give an inch.

Who else is on the docket: The top seed in the qualifying group is Nephara, ranked fourth in the world, the top-ranked domestic association - in which Girardi and defender Pavel Cicak play in the Premier League - and the reigning third-place finisher. The first Delaclava-Nephara match, on the road, will be Delaclava's tenth match of qualifying, and hopefully the team is a well-running engine by the time that meeting rolls around. Other high-ranked teams include Darmen (26th), Jeruselem (41st), and Sarzonia (65th).

It's not an easy group, but certainly one where the Phoenixes can find their footing. A strong opening result against Sarzonia, by rank the fourth-best team in the group, would demonstrate that Delaclava is ready to face the world's best from the get go.

The Phoenixes will have plenty of home fans watching: Interest in Delaclav football is at an all-time high as the Phoenixes' return to international play has heated up. And it's not just the results on the field: Delaclava co-hosted the recent Baptism of Fire, the tournament for first-time World Cup entrants, along with Esportivan neighbors Appalachia and Ethane. The tournament was by all measures a success for the DFA - fans from Delaclava, participating nations, and elsewhere in Atlantian Oceania flocked to the various stadiums to take in what turned out to be an exciting and high-level competition. The Tequilo—Alba and Cymru match attracted just two hundred less than the 150,000 capacity of Golden Phoenix Field in Catherina - and that was a round of 16 match.

Prior to this tournament, the DFA was looking at using the most reasonable stadiums for qualifying matches, likely no greater than 50,000 people. But there's no doubt that home matches against the likes of Sarzonia, Nephara, and Jeruselem - once victims of an 8-0 World Cup proper loss to Delaclava in Corcorran - would sell out those larger stadiums, even Golden Phoenix Field, and especially if the Phoenixes turn in respectable performances.

The current directive from the DFA to venues - not to mention bars and restaurants - is to be ready for anything. And that's our message to you too. There's plenty to be excited about - now time to see if the boys in red and gold can deliver.

by **Terre Septentrionale** » Sat May 23, 2020 4:59 pm

World Cup 85: Terre Septentrionale's complete schedule and group 3 analysis

Ville Jacques-Cartier, DC - The World Cup qualifications starts on saturday may 23rd 2026 (coincidentally, 6 years ago, in 2020, may 23rd was also on a saturday) and will be held until august and in september 2026 it will be the World Cup proper. Terre Septentrionale starts the competition on the road against Chromatika. Yes on game 1, already an important game between the 30th and 45th best teams in the world. Only one of them could advance to the World Cup (assuming Eura will also advance), but Savojarna still can scramble the cards. The first home game for the Nordiques is sunday may 31st 2026 against Sabalonia in Szentgyörgyvölgy. Szentgyörgyvölgy was choosen for the 1st home game because of it's central location in Terre Septentrionale. Here is the complete schedule.

Matchday 1 - Saturday may 23rd 2026 - Chromatika (30) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 2 - Sunday may 31st 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Sabalonia (330) - @ Laszlo Kocsis Stadion, Szentgyörgyvölgy, BA
Matchday 3 - Wednesday june 3rd 2026 - Savojarna (56) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 4 - Bye
Matchday 5 - Wednesday june 10th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Sanctanus (288) - @ Tolhurst Park, Shelburne, SH
Matchday 6 - Saturday june 13th 2026 - Adyatin (218) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 7 - Wednesday june 17th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs The Jovannic (UR) - @ Stadion Spinut, Vukosavljevica, DA
Matchday 8 - Sunday june 21st 2026 - Wanarpu (UR) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 9 - Wednesday june 24th 2026 - St. John the Baptist Day (national holiday) - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Eura (3) - @ Stadion Hydro-Polnocna, Trzebiegoszcz, PO
Matchday 10 - Sunday june 28th 2026 - Northwest Kalactin (134) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 11 - Thursday july 2nd 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Eshan (70) - @ Multiversal Hotel Stadium, El Perro, TX
Matchday 12 - Sunday july 5th 2026 - Alba and Cymru (228) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ Seumas Field, Edinburgh
Matchday 13 - Wednesday july 8th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs The Sarian (95) - @ Multiversal Hotel Stadium, El Perro, TX

Mid qualifications break

Matchday 14 - Saturday july 18th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Chromatika (30) - @ Stadion Hydro-Polnocna, Trzebiegoszcz, PO
Matchday 15 - Wednesday july 22 2026 - Sabalonia (330) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 16 - Sunday july 26th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Savojarna (56) - @ Stadion Hydro-Polnocna, Trzebiegoszcz, PO
Matchday 17 - Bye
Matchday 18 - Sunday august 2nd 2026 - Sanctanus (288) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 19 - Wednesday august 5th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Adyatin (218) - @ Stadion Władysław Trzaskowski, Rzodkiewnica, KZ
Matchday 20 - Sunday august 9th 2026 - The Jovannic (UR) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ Great Jovannica Stadium (Nationale Jovannica)
Matchday 21 - Wednesday august 12th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Wanarpu (UR) - @ San Pedro Stadium, San Pedro, TX
Matchday 22 - Sunday august 16th 2026 - Eura (3) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 23 - Wednesday august 19th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Northwest Kalactin (134) - @ Stadion Miejski Krzczonow, Krzczonow, MA
Matchday 24 - Sunday august 23rd 2026 - Eshan (70) - vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ unknown
Matchday 25 - Wednesday august 26th 2026 - Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Alba and Cymru (228) - @ Stadion Krapinska, Kukljica, DA
Matchday 26 - Sunday august 30th 2026 - The Sarian (95) vs Terre Septentrionale (45) - @ De Stadionnational

Post qualifications break

September 2026: 85th World Cup in Farfadillis & Mriin or 77th Cup of Harmony in Kelssek & Zwangzug

Group 3 analysis

Tier 1
Eura (3)

Eura is all alone in tier 1 and is a lock to qualify for the World Cup. It would be a really bad luck for them to not qualify.

Tier 2
Chromatika (30)
Terre Septentrionale (45)
Savojarna (56)

In tier 2, you have Chromatika, Terre Septentrionale and Savojarna. These 3 teams will fight for the 2nd qualifying spot for group 3. Chromatika is the favorite. Terre Septentrionale had their ups and downs. A disappointing WC 84 qualifications, followed by a 2nd place in the Cup of Harrmony 76, followed by a not impressive run at the Independent Cup 9. Savojarna can scramble the cards and can qualify ahead of Chromatika and Terre Septentrionale if both disappoints. Key matchup includes: MD1 Chromatika (30) vs Terre Septentrionale (45); MD3 Savojarna (56) vs Terre Septentrionale (45); MD13 Savojarna (56) vs Chromatika (30); MD14 Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Chromatika (30); MD16 Terre Septentrionale (45) vs Savojarna (56) and MD26 Chromatika (30) vs Savojarna (56).

Tier 3
Eshan (70)
The Sarian (95)
Northwest Kalactin (134)

In tier 3, you have Eshan, The Sarian and Northwest Kalactin. It's not impossible for them to qualify but it will be hard. They can mess with tier 1 and 2 teams by beating them and costing them a place at the World Cup.

Tier 4
Adyatin (218)
Alba and Cymru (228)

In tier 4, you have Adyatin and Alba and Cymru. Alba and Cymru is an intriguing team and could have a good run in these qualifications but it will be hard for them to qualify.

Tier 5
Sanctanus (288)
Sabalonia (330)
The Jovannic (UR)
Wanarpu (UR)

Then in tier 5, you have the rest. Four teams who should grab some pop corn and watch other teams play.

All Terre Septentrionale games will be broadcasted on TVSports1 in French, Polish and English. Key matchups involving teams in our group will be broadcasted either on TVSports1 and TVSports2. Matchups involving teams from other groups will be shown on TVSports2.

Wlodzimierz Pietruszewski,
Senior writer,
La tribune Septentrionale

by **Zwangzug** » Sat May 23, 2020 5:37 pm

The good news about managing in a league without promotion and relegation was that it gave you pretty decent job security. Bronwyn Sadler had accepted this as one of the peculiarities of the league in which she found herself managing, even though the franchise system was foreign to her. "We're baseball fans," the Zwangzug faithful attempted to explain, "if your team was kicked out? Of the major leagues? Just because they had a bad year? That, that would be terrible, they're your team."

Bronwyn harbored some skepticism of this mentality, not least because not all of the franchises in the "first division" had the dignity of representing a city. Her Rovers United were, as it said on the tin, true barnstormers. They certainly had no academy team--the other clubs didn't really, either, they all expected youth to be playing for high schools and universities rather than pro sides. At least the other clubs could call upon local high schools if they qualified to the Youth Cup. This was, admittedly, not in the Rovers' expectations, but she dreamed. And that is why her dreams took her to scouting high school teams in distant Inver, home of the Millers baseball team, while her club travelled without her.

It was supposed to be an exhibition match, and it was. The Sherpa Empire side, however, were more interested in espousing the merits of their nations' auto racing and baseball culture; the Rovers by and large appreciated the baseball discussion, and the mountains, while regarding the automobiles with horror and/or curiosity. Matters were not helped by a sluggish referee who did not seem inclined to punish fouls from either side, and that led to aggressive tackling when both squads correctly realized he wasn't looking. Despite their attacking style, the Rovers were held to a scoreless draw by the home side.

And then they returned home, such as it was. Wayr Stadium, in the isolated Rackham Range, was not exactly the national team's home field, but it (and the even more remote former practice facility) had a long history in the World Cup, so the Rovers had taken to using it as a training ground on and off. High-altitude training built energy, and if there was one thing Sadler rewarded, it was hustle. (If there were two things she rewarded, it was hustle and some knowledge of how countries that really cared about football operated, but first things first.)

So they practiced. They dribbled around corner flags and played five-a-side; they looked over the tactics for the upcoming season of the 1./. Canbix had brought in a new Astograthi player. Slogda continued to be eminently beatable by all and sundry. 102d might be more of a threat with Lissa Crain called up in Kurt Uehara's absence, or might be less of a threat with her distracted by international duty.

Tessie Murdans, the right-back, glanced down at her phone. Then a longer glance. A longer.

"The ref," she said. "The bleeping ref."

"Yeah," said Samuel McWhorter, a midfielder. "Bleep him."

Tessie shook her head. "No," she said. "He, uh. He's in the hospital. In the Sherpa Empire."

"Did a fan try to kill him or something?" asked Rowan Singh. "I mean, jeez."

"No!" Tessie snapped. "He's sick, I mean, really sick. There's that virus going around in their country, some kind of really dangerous flu."

"I heard about that in the WBC," said Fiona Hubbard, the second-string keeper. "It's pretty dangerous."

Niels Jin-Kuang winced. "Those eleven and us, I mean--we were all over the place, kicking the same mud, breathing the same sweat."

"Yeah," said Samuel, "I stole their goalie's water bottle when he wasn't looking."

"This is serious," said Niels. "Anything infectious the ref has, that they have? We almost certainly have it too."

"What do we do? Call coach and tell her we want to forfeit matchday one?"

"No," said Ryan Welkin-Farr, the captain. "It means we stay right where we are."

"What?" Rowan asked.

"If we leave, we spread it to whoever we meet. Where's the next big train station, Outrive? You guys aren't stupid, you know what exponential growth looks like. This is a big league, but it's a bigger country. We have to buckle down until we know it's safe."

"But when is that?" Fiona asked. "I mean, from what I saw, the case in the Sherpa Empire was pretty bad."

"Can't have been that bad or they wouldn't have let us in," pointed out Jill McFoun.

"If there's anywhere to be trapped, this is it," said Tessie. "We know the locker rooms, we know the concession stands, nobody's going to accidentally walk in on us. Ryan's right."

Tim Marley, the Newmanistanian left-back, sighed, no doubt regretting leaving the security of the ENSL for a higher-ranked UICA/IFCF league. "Next time we need a friendly, we're finding a bleeping college team."

by **Vdara** » Sat May 23, 2020 6:08 pm

What the fuck?

VdarArena, Chania

The fans were in high spirits. An easy game against a rubbish team. This was going to be a fun watch. As the players walked out, the fans cheered. Excitement was high. Enthusiasm was high. Moustakakos was surprisingly not high, since he knew he couldn’t smoke weed before a match. After a few minutes of lining up with the opposition and then getting into formation, the referee blew the whistle for kickoff.

The lineup is as follows:

5: Lo Sontano start off with an early attack, and they fire a shot. That's off target.
8: Fotellis is powering forward. The defenders have no chance, he’s going for goal and he shoots... straight at the keeper.
11: Lo Sontano are back in the attack, but it’s out for a goal kick following an awful shot.
12: Less than a minute after the last shot, Lo Sontano are back at it again with another shot off target.
16: A rubbish tackle from a Sontanoan defender takes Karalas down. It’s a yellow card for Lo Sontano.
18: It’s a free kick to Vdara. Vlahiades lines up to take it. He shoots, it’s a lovely curve... and it’s over the bar! Goal kick.
22: Fotellis is through on goal here, he’s skinned every defender, he’s one on one with the keeper as he... goes for power and fluffs his lines. Right over the top of the goal.
28: It’s another menacing-looking attack from Vdara, as Karalas does some lovely footwork to send the Sontanoan midfielders to ground... and he’s dispossessed.
35: Vdara have been passing it around for the last few minutes, but haven’t been able to fully make an impact on this game. However, neither has the opposition.
40: It’s another yellow card for Lo Sontano, as their attacker dives in the box in an attempt to win a penalty. No penalty given, free kick to Vdara.
42: Yet again, a yellow card for Lo Sontano. This time, it was a dive to try and get a free kick. Cheaters never win, as the saying goes.
47: Vdara are through on goal yet again, right after the kickoff for the second half... and it’s straight at the keeper.
52: It’s a goal for Lo Sontano! A horrific defending error led to their attacker snatching it and sending it straight past Moustakakos! The fans are fuming!
61: Kimon Karalas gets a yellow card for a harsh tackle.
73: Vlahiades is making a lovely run on the left side here, he’s getting ready to cross, Fotellis is in the box, he crosses it in... and it’s over the touchline for a goal kick.
82: It’s a yellow card for Mavroglou, but we can’t tell why. The referee has made up his mind, though.
91: Lo Sontano scores again! We don’t know who, because they don’t appear to have a roster, but they have made it 2-0! It’s bedlam in the away end, but pure rage around the stadium! The cans are flying into the pitch!

The whistle blew for full time. The scoreboard showed that Vdara had lost their first game of the qualifiers. The fans voiced their disappointment, and loudly. Before any abuse came their way, the players quickly made their way into the dressing room, with Væñøœrëñbérghüïś angrily following.

The dressing room was full of players blaming each other until Væñøœrëñbérghüïś slowly walked in, silencing the room. He began to pace around the room, absolutely fuming at what he had just seen.

”I would like every single f**king one of you to tell me what the f**k happened out there right f**king now. This is our first f**king game back and you blew it right in front of our own f**king fans. Hundreds of them. Thousands of them. F**king 30-something,000 of them. You all helped a f**king lowly side from the middle of f**king nowhere get their first win of the tournament. Now, this wouldn’t be so bad if it was against someone like Equestria or Xanneria, but f**king Lo Sontano? Get a f**king grip! We are Vdara, you know? WE. ARE. VDARA! We don’t lose 2-f**king-nil to f**king Lo Sontano! Jesus, people. Jeeeeeesus. You have disappointed the entire nation today. I hope you’re fucking happy, I really do. If you don’t get ahold of yourselves next game, I might just throw myself out of a f**king window. Actually, you know what? I might do that tonight! It would save me the pain of watching you lot play football ever again! Now, I want every single one of you low lives to explain what the FUCK happened out there. Right now. Come on, we don’t have much longer.”

The room stayed silent. Players kept their heads hung in shame. Væñøœrëñbérghüïś continued to pace around the room, circling like a hungry shark.

”Oh come on, it’s not f**king rocket science, is it? Just tell me what went wrong and we can try and fix it for next game!”

David Xeniadis looked particularly miffed. He had defended well, but the only two shots on target that Lo Sontano had ended up in goals, which he couldn’t bear. He looked up and began to speak.

“I think the problems lie upfront.”

Væñøœrëñbérghüïś darted his head in the direction of Xeniadis, and stood right in front of him.

”Oh is that right, Einstein? The problems lie in the attack that got zero goals? I would have never thought it! Would you like to tell me why?”

Xeniadis thought about it for a moment, and began to speak again.

”Us defenders did everything. Their attackers were awful, and we capitalised on that by keeping them at bay for the whole game, but Lazelis and Fotellis didn’t exactly do well with the chances they had, many of them clear cut.”

Væñøœrëñbérghüïś looked up from Xeniadis and began pacing around the room.

”Full marks for Xeniadis! Completely and utterly f**king right, and it pains me to say that. You know why? Because I never thought we’d be in this f**king situation! Now, I could let the defenders off the hook here and only focus on the awful attacking of the two dimwits we call strikers, but if you didn’t already f**king know, we work as a team! We work together to win and draw games, but not to lose them. None of you worked as a team out there. Not a single f**king one of you. Now, I’d like you all to get changed and f**k off in an orderly manner.”

Væñøœrëñbérghüïś walked over to the door, kicked it open, and strolled out, still angry as ever. He could be heard yelling and screaming down the corridor, getting quieter as he got further. The dressing room remained silent. They had to. They had just embarrassed their country on their first game back.

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