NationStates

Posted: **Wed Dec 18, 2019 10:40 pm**

A Simple Appeal

Now we shall-

Wait..

Ugghh..

Yeah, I wanted to mention this. Let me tell you all a story. Me and Free Republics.. have it somewhat odd. I could ask why the journalists is some inept to the point of me wanting to demand full government control of the media, but you heard about the concept of "free speech", hadn't you? While I respect the concept, I know it isn't an excuse to publish your meaningless and deliberately nontrivial nonsense for people to read, dumbing down their intelligence. My propaganda is better than this! Which is the case of Gossip Magazine. They claim that they had taken an interview with me, along publishing some information rather... embarrassing. Checking their photos, they were all fake. So I decided to share one with Jessica Madden to piss her off, knowing she's a lesbian with that Charlie girl. Someone from Foreign Affairs sent a reply, which they dismissed like we weren't a threat to them.

Let me tell you something. If you think it's funny to post a video of Keller as a whore and slut, I will remind you otherwise. And I will make sure that your severed head is crushed under my foot, as I use your entrails as party streamers. You can understand how... irate I was. So I decided to go over to try to ask whoever ran Gossip Magazine a simple talk. It was supposed to do well, but I guess something happened and there was a large misunderstanding. Then, Gossip Magazine, after one failed assassination attempt by yours truly has decided to shoot themselves in the foot again, learning nothing.

The Leader was in his office, doing the typical stream of issues that appeared on his desk, where he needlessly got rid of them as usual. That was until a soldier arrived to inform the Leader. "Leader, sir. We have Dorbi Truman, Secretary of Foreign Relations with information from Foreign Imports. He called it's an important matter."
"From which nation?"
"...Free Republics, sir."

This got the Leader's attention, since he knows about Free Republics. He just wondered what it had to do with Main Nation Ministry. "Bring him in." the Leader said, where Dorbi looked pale already. "What is it now?" the Leader demanded, knowing he came for a reason. "You are aware of Gossip Magazine, right?" Truman asked, where the Leader paid more attention. "What did they do now?" the Leader said, in frustration where Truman had a flash drive to show the Leader.

Playing the contents on the Leader's new monitor, the Leader read the online article by Gossip Magazine. "They managed to get a recording from Consul Scarlett Nicholls?" the Leader asked, playing the recording for him to hear. "She covered it up to avoid international tensions, but the magazine seems contempt on revealing this information."
"They don't seem to understand the concept of truth. They truly turned truth into nothing but ignorance for consumers to absorb." the Leader said, where he checked the next article. This time, it provoked more of a response. "Where's our technology? We need to immediately hack Gossip Magazine to delete any files of any "so-called" sex tapes." the Leader demanded, as he started to make sure his suit was neat. "What are you doing?" Truman said, nervously.

"I'm going to go off to have a chat with Free Republics itself. And I'm going to violently murder Jasper Chutings, knowing he's the one behind this. Maybe Etoile Quenneville. A good chunk of lead for both of them will do." the Leader bluntly said, as he started to leave his office. "Sir! What will the public think that you're going to start a war?!"
"Who said, I want to start a war? I'm just going to reason with them. Then, I'm going to kill Jasper and Etoile."
"Leader, if I insist.." Truman tried to say something, but he was immediately met by a cold glare by the Leader. He wasn't going to listen to him, until he did what he asked. This wasn't going to end well. They going to try to kill the Leader over there.

Princess Keller Harrington and Jason Masami were at a cafe together, as Keller was trying hard to hide her obvious affection towards him. This didn't help that despite Keller passive-aggressively threatening him, Masami didn't seem to be bothered by it and in a optimistic sense, happily didn't seem to mind this.
"I thought about booking tickets to the next Action Hero movie. You like movies?" Jason Masami asked, where Keller replied. "Oh course! We're going to watch a movie! Not like it's another date or anything. Not that you think that you...you dummy!" Keller said, being a typical tsundere as always. "So what time do you want to watch it? Weekend is good, but I don't want to sit in the front. Kind of a ripoff."
"How about we-" Keller heard a loud rumble on her phone, as she went to check her message.

Dorbi Truman: URGENT! Leader is going to Free Republics to possibly kill more people! I know he has you under surveillance, but I want you to not start a damn war! HURRY!

Keller could only sigh in annoyance. "I'm sorry. Duty calls." Keller said to Masami, as she had to left. "We still going to watch that movie, right?" Masami asked. "Yes, Masami! I make sure we will watch the movie when I come back from another assignment." Keller reassured him, though it was probably going to take days.

"What's the situation?" Keller demanded at Truman's office, as he was getting his laptop ready. "The Leader is inclined to terminate permanently two individuals from Gossip Magazine. A tabloid in Free Republics. They seem intent on releasing as much misinformation about Main Nation Ministry as possible." Truman explained to Keller, though she didn't seem to care. "And why do you want to get me involved?"
"Because..Gossip Magazine had claimed to have a sex tape of you and another individual."
"What?"
"It's a deepfake."
"Ok. I think I know why the Leader is bloodthirsty for them. They made an article or video that pissed them off?"
"He burned down that skyscraper, because of that article that came with the video. He just went ballistic. I don't know how to explain it. It was like he was a different person all of the sudden."

"You want me to go to Free Republics to stop the Leader from going on another killing spree?" Keller asked him, where he started two more articles on his computer. "Gossip Magazine seems to want to share any secret they can make lies on. This can be disastrous to our national security and the Ministry of National Security are people, who are ruthless."
"There's a Ministry for National Security?"
"There is ministries for almost everything. Some public. Some private. Some I don't think the Leader knows of. But Gossip Magazine had released another sex tape with the Leader himself." Truman tried to explain, but Keller already looked bewildered. "Isn't the Leader like the same age as me?" Keller asked about the sex tape, where Truman looked bewildered when trying to discuss it also. "Deep fake. End of story. Then, there is Gossip Magazine releasing another sex tape with you and Jessica Madden.."

"They know she's with Charlie?" Keller asked, wondering if Gossip Magazine had revealed private information about Jessica. "Charlie? Who's Charlie? She has a boyfriend?" Dorbi asked. "Nothing."
"But you know what you got to do."
"Save Free Replubics?"
"No really. You are to provide diplomatic talk with Consul Scarlett Nicholas. You are the less psychotic one after all."
"Who said I'm psychotic?"
"Exactly. We will have our spies disguise themselves as tourists and attempt to hack into the nation's internet to trace the source of the sex tapes for their online articles. If you find the Leader, get him back to his senses."

Keller knew what she had to do, but the last time she tried to reason with the Leader and talk some actual sense into him, he took an amnestic and passed out on his own desk. Yet, the Leader wasn't the one who would want to start a war with other nations, since he knew he could easily wipe them out, if he had to. But she need to make sure he didn't burn any buildings, the thought of which made her groan in annoyance at the unintended casualties that the Leader commit in his misadventures.

"Get a telegram sent to them. Consul Nicholas will most likely read it. The government of Free Republics is most likely expecting a response."

To: Consul Scarlett Nicholas
From: Princess Keller Harrington

Dear Consul Scarlett Nicholas,
It's important to inform you that the Leader seems to be more organized on killing two individuals involved with Gossip Magazine, though I was told about his arson attack, which I deeply wish to pay respects to those who had perished. While I'm much lower in power than him, I can still think up a way to punish him. Dorbi Truman, the Secretary of Foreign Relationships, wants to have access to the internet in your nation to track down and attempt to hack the actual servers that Gossip Magazine operate on.

I want to discuss anti-war talk to avoid a conflict with Free Republics. It's important to warn me of the location of the Leader in your nation, as he isn't going to stop until Gossip Magazine is dismantled. I'm already heading by plane to your nation to explain more.

Be on the lookout for the Leader! He's extremely unpredictably and he will most likely kill people who get in his way!

Sincerely,
Princess Keller Harrington

Posted: **Wed Dec 18, 2019 11:40 pm**

MD6: Chromatika 3-1 Plane of Possibility
Goals: Nocturne '11, Sterling '49, Non '54
Starting XI (4-2-3-1): Tioux; Xiao - Ken - Baugh - Nocturne; Ingalls - Kim, M.S.; Etienne (C) - Sterling - Reynolds; Non.
Substitutes: Kelly -> Etienne ('51), Bird -> Sterling ('77), Vidal -> Non ('83)
Projected Starting XI @ Northwest Kalactin: Nichols; Xiao - Will - Rondeau - Rowles; Avis - Kim, M.S.; Kelly - Kim, M.J. - Croix-Pierre; Andisori, B.

Football Part 7: vs. Plane of Possibility

Jillian Nier, Football Correspondent

Sometimes, we can become slaves to statistics, and those statistics don't tell the whole story. Other times, they actually explain exactly what is going on in the life of a competition for a squad.

The telling statistic for the Chromatik Anomalies of World Cup 84 is their Goals Differential after six matches: +4.

If you look around the competition, there have been huge scores posted upon lower-ranked teams by most of the multiverse's big-ranked nations. Banija pasting Atlantic Republic 8-1. Eura shutting out Andromeda Island Group five-nil. Equestria hanging seven last matchday against Darkmania. I mean, even Ancherion has defeated Zwangzug 4-0, a major upset. The Anomalies? All their wins and losses have been by two goals or less.

But what does this statistic really tell us?

In games against tougher opponents - we've had three of those, against Mriin, Main Nation Ministry, and Busoga Islands specifically (Busoga defeated Main Nation, by the way, which is fantastic for the Chromatiks) - it means that the Anomalies know how to stay in a game and keep things close, hoping for a spark, Yes, that wasn't enough to get the victory against Busoga, and Mriin's suffocation of Chromatika was rather complete, but there is a semblance of a chance, and that goes a long way in staying relevant in most games.

Against lesser opponents - the last three matches - I'd like to pose a theory that it's due to the younger players making first forays into international football. Kavagrad was Nova's first real start in a game of such import. Lons and Plane of Possibility are the first two caps of Ferret's career. Besides, the three points at the end are what truly matter in the end, and though yes, Goal Differential matters if things end up tied and Mriin does have a ridiculous +20 mark at this point (Busoga Islands have a +6), it's not really the deciding factor.

Besides, Chromatika's schedule doesn't get harder until the next round robin. Games against Northwest Kalactin, Petrovsky, Bloing, and Zealandiana await, and those nations are all ranked seventh through tenth in the group at this point. There will be plenty of opportunities to pad the scoreline, as long as the team continues to win.

What about the game against the Planers at home?

Though it was a bit strange to see such fantastical creatures on the pitch, the Anomalies played rather well, I thought. The header off a corner kick ball from Sterling was the first scored by a defensive back this campaign, and something that Nocturne may be able to do ample times in his career to come. Sterling herself showed a moment of brilliance early in the second half in a long-range shot, before Kristian Non put the game away with more than thirty minutes to go. Mostly a comfortable win, barring a reckless challenge that left Baugh with a yellow card and a close-ranged free kick that skimmed past Ferret's left pinkie into the net.

Next up, Finn Nichols will get a crack at the net, while Thoreau Rondeau makes his cycle debut with Jarret Rowles, the player who's colorblind. The highlight, though, will be the Kim twins on the pitch at the same time, alongside the younger Andisori and Andréa Croix-Pierre, who recently made a big move to one of the more premier clubs in Schottia. If you like young Chromatik football, the next game won't be one to miss - and before a bye as well.

Tsk, tsk, though. Unranked Petrovsky has less goals allowed than Chromatika. The humanity...

Part 6: The Plot

Part 7: The Mystic

If one were to make the trek to Felswyr, to one of the coldest places in Chromatika, and go up the slopes of Mr. Niai, there is a little hut.

The Chromatik Ranger Service leaves the hut alone. There is a lone trail to the hut, but not many go up the trail, and each one has to call in.

Why is that? One might ask, why does someone get such preferential treatment?

In the last year, this hut is where Joan Myrtle made her home. She tried the city life with Keira Andisori for a while, meeting with Alina Krasnikova and the Chromatik government daily to come up with ways to combat the schemes of Venom and his comrades. However, she quickly found that whether it be due to her alignment or her aura, she could not stay for long in cities before she became distressed, and the distress triggered reactions in the new humane form she had that were debilitating. Therefore, several climates were tested, and when they discovered that she preferred the cold, and higher altitudes, this hut was provided.

Myrtle didn't require much food, nor much water; she did need three hours of sleep a night. However it was that her Enlightened form being earthbound worked, it came with some limitations, but not many. She remained wearing the shades that Keira Andisori had given her, as her eyes would be a dead giveaway to the alien nature of her being; her linguistic skills were unmatched, being able to speak to anyone in their native tongue.

Theories were made about how Venom may exist in Chromatik society if his being was even half as sophisticated as Joan. She tried to tell them that each Enlightened was different due to their aura and their area of expertise, but many would not listen. Some still viewed her with suspicion, or worse, disbelief.

Not that she cared - she was only on this plane for one reason. To dispense justice upon one who had gained autonomy and escaped to wreak havoc upon this other plane of existence. After that was accomplished, she would ascend once more, become part of The Enlightened's collective under The Three, and achieve wholeness once again, having served her purpose.

And to that end, she toiled daily, trying to find through the networks provided by the Chromatiks of the signs that may lead to the whereabouts of Venom and his compatriots.

With the election on its way, and all that it meant for, she could reason with incredible certainty that he would make his move before it was over. However, she would be there this time - and that could perhaps make all the difference.

Rainbow League System Preview

6. Eyrods

Nickname: Jungle Cats
Fans: Cats, Eyrodii
Location: Eyrods, Myana Island, Chromatika
Stadium: The Jungle (74,950; 26,000 Seats)
History:

Manager: Devin Munoz, 52
Formation: (4-1-4-1)

Background: One of the unexplained phenomenon of Chromatika is the climate of Eyrods, located on Myana Island. The Eastern half of Myana Island is a temperate jungle, teeming with wildlife and milder weather. Nobody is quite sure of why this is, but that is why Eyrods is the zoological capital of Chromatika. Eyrodi are appreciative of wildlife and have learned to coexist with it. The city itself is at the Coast, while the Jungle lies at the southern end. The Jungle is the greenest stadium in Chromatika, and we're not just talking about the color scheme. The stadium is made of recyclable matter - seats made of reused plastic, etc. It's a marvel of engineering and architecture, and it's not unusual to have birds fly over the stadium often. Don't worry - there's a clear roof that usually goes over it to protect you from anything that might fall from them.

Preseason Grading: brought to you by ChromatikBet.com

Fanbase: 6/10 - Eyrods has a small, nice fanbase that is just happy to have a team at all.
Manager: 7/10 - Devin Munoz was Gerard Burr's assistant during his stint in Eyrods. A hard taskmaster who just wants his players to succeed, he is not unreasonable. He is one of the handful of assistants now in charge of the clubs.
Keepers: N/A - Eyrods is in need of a starting keeper.
Defenders: N/A: Eyrods is in need of two defensive backs. Kingsgrove and Mutapcic are both past thirty, so it may be worth looking for alternatives as well.
Midfielders: N/A: Eyrods is in need of two players in their midfield. Criselda Burlew is their mainstay, and Burton Augustyn is the one responsible for helping with the attack.
Strikers: 7/10: With so much foreign talent displaced, Leann Lemus may be one of the better names left in the league. A quick first step and a long stride, Lemus can strike from near or far.
Greatest Need: When the Chromatik League disbanded, all foreign players were let go. Eyrods has a blueprint of what they want to be, but to run a five-man midfield, Munoz has some work to do.

Next: Felswyr

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 1:31 am**

Why I Hate Football

Part Twelve.

Winter preparations

‘It’s amazing what you’ve done here Gary; really!’ Seb stated, as they meandered through the gardens. ‘You get so many people who talk about combating climate change – myself included – but you’ve actually done something about it. Are your family entirely self-sufficient now?’ Gary’s gardens spread over what was nearly a hectare of the valley. It had been a gradual expansion, but he now had enough vegetable patches and pasture to cover all his needs. It was a winding maze of raised beds and greenhouses, trellises, canes, and fruit trees, most of which were currently in a state of seasonal transition. The amount of work required in readying the family for the winter was no small undertaking. Nearby, the smoke from a dying bonfire rose into the pale blue sky, and the sound goats and hens was audible in the background.

‘In terms of food, yes.’ Gary stated proudly, feeling his chest puff out. ‘We actually produce a surplus, which we trade with the village on the other side of the stream.’ The weather had now well and truly switched, with long plumes of condensation issuing from their breath. The rich reds and golds of autumn were gone, replaced with skeletal twigs and branches, white with frost. The gardens themselves were in a state of flux, with the last of the beans in the process of being picked, and the ground being turned over for the planting of cabbage, kale, and other winter vegetables.

‘There’s a village on the other side of the stream?’ Asked Seb, surprised. ‘Is it community run, do you lease the land, or are you all just squatting here..?’

‘No. It’s my land.’ Gary replied adamantly. ‘I bought it from one of the local landowners. The village just kind of sprung up for some reason.’ - He didn’t really want to go into it – ‘We respect each other’s privacy, so...’ He offered a shrug of the shoulders.

Sure enough, with the foliage now gone, there was a small assortment of temporary (and some not so temporary) structures visible on the other side of the stream, about three hundred metres away.

‘Over there?’ Seb asked, spotting first the smoke from their stoves and campfires.

‘I’ve always referred to them as the Newcomers.’ Gary replied, with an affirmative nod of the head. ‘But to be honest they’ve been here for the best part of a decade – come to think of it – maybe even longer.’ Whilst you’d never hear him admit it, Gary had grown to accept their presence, maybe even find it comforting.

‘How many people live there..?’ Seb asked, as they made the way to the edge of Gary’s Garden proper, a boundary demarked by a bramble hedge and a small gate. The leaves were browning, but there were still a few berries available for harvest, prompting Gary to pick a small handful.

‘Here.’ He handed half of them to his guest. ‘Ripened on the bush, you’ll not find sweeter than that anywhere.’ The contrast between what lay either side of the hedge was stark, with the managed gardens giving way abruptly to shrubs and heathland, with the odd tuft of heather and gorse poking their way through spongy grass and moss. ‘About forty or fifty; to answer your question.’ Gary was trying to do a quick head count, but the numbers across the stream were fairly fluid.

They both paused as they reached the gate. Madita and Rik were still in view, currently half way up quince and apple trees respectively, and most definitely having a good time. Gary actually felt like a proper adult, hosting a play-date, chatting to an acquaintance like it was all perfectly normal. He’d been stressing about this for days, but Seb was actually not entirely obnoxious. Despite the fact that he seemed pretty straight laced, he was genuinely interested in what Gary was trying to achieve here.

‘Would you like to go over and have a look at the village?’ Asked Gary, but he already knew the answer.

Granton Green, North Handon, 2005...

‘…It’s going to take more than a week of dishes to make up for this.’ Gary insisted, as he clambered further up the tree, clinging to the trunk for dear life.

‘I’m sorry Gary.’ Darren’s voice sounded frantic, as he pulled himself up onto the same branch, which was now groaning under both their weights. ‘I think we made a mistake by running, they just thought it was a game after that.’

Gary looked down at the dozen or so fourteen-year-olds who were circling ominously beneath them. Some were smoking cigarettes, drinking ciders from big plastic bottles, and doing all manner of unwholesome things. ‘I think we’ll be fine so long as we stay up here.’ He replied. ‘As of yet, I’ve not seen any projectiles.’

‘Maybe we should try telling them who we are...?’ Darren offered. ‘I mean, if they are Granton Vale fans, they’re likely to let us leave unscathed.’

‘Yeah, and If they’re Handon North fans, they’ll set our feet in concrete and launch us off the pier!’ Gary replied through gritted teeth. ‘We just need to hold our nerve, and hope that this branch can support out weight for the rest of the evening.’ From the looks of the tree, its structural integrity was highly debatable. The main truck itself was barely wider than a man’s wrist. To anyone watching, the whole scene must have looked painfully ridiculous. Two grown men, hiding up a tree in the middle of a play park…

‘JIMMY MCGOWAN! What do you think you are doing!’ Gary and Darren turned their heads in the direction of the shrill, woman’s voice. Just across the road from the park, two bicycles and pulled up, and two figures were currently striding purposefully in their direction.

‘Oh f*ck off!’ One of the boys replied, as they regrouped, ready to face this fresh threat.

‘I can see a gap..!’ Darren whispered. ‘Maybe we can make a run for it.’

‘We’d never make it.’ Gary shook his head, not at all keen on the idea of jumping down. ‘Let’s hold tight and see how this pans out.’

‘Don’t you tell me to f*uck of you little c*nt!’ The lead woman wasn’t put off by teenagers affront. ‘Do you want me to give your dad a call and tell him what you’re up to!’ She took her phone out of her pocked and flipped it open.

‘F*ck you, you stuck-up cow…’ He muttered, before picking up his bottle of cider, and heading from the scene. He was followed, as if by magic, by the majority of the group.

‘It’s working!’ Gary said, grinning broadly. Tears of relief filling his eyes. ‘It’s working!’

‘C’mon.’ The other woman said to a few of the stragglers, sensing that their morale was now broken. ‘Get out of here, and find something better to do with your evening!’

The teenagers may have been scattered to the seven winds, but in the face of such formidable women, Gary and Darren were no less cowed. They watched with trepidation as they approached. ‘Look at this mess,’ the first woman said to her accomplice, picking up a supermarket carrier bag full of empty lager cans, and slinging it in the bin. ‘It’s a kids’ play park.’

‘Are youse okay?’ She shouted up, eventually, drawing near the foot of the tree. Gary detected pity rather than laughter in her voice – not that one was much better than the other.

‘Define okay?’ He replied, growing increasingly nervous that the branch would buckle under the weight of two professional footballers.

‘Unharmed..?’ The second girl offered.

‘All but the last remnants of our pride.’ Darren answered, desperate to salvage some.

‘Sorry.’ Said the lead girl, who was small with straight auburn hair. ‘My wee brother and his friends can be arseholes. Can we give you a hand down, or are you good to jump..?’ After a bit of persuasion Darren jumped down with a thud, whereas Gary gladly accepted a little assistance.

‘I really can’t thank you enough, …?’ Gary said meekly, making it clear that he was enquiring after their names.

‘Mary.’ The Auburn haired girl offered a hand.

‘My name’s Claire– ’ said the other, before Mary cut her off suddenly.

‘Gary Corsie!’ She shrieked excitedly, before switching her gaze to Darren. ‘And Darren Hanlon!’ She placed her hands to her head in disbelief. ‘Look Claire, can you believe it?!’

‘Well you know what they say,’ Claire laughed. ‘You should never meet your heroes.’

‘We’ve just been watching youse! At the game I mean!’ Even in the badly lit park, it was obvious she was blushing. ‘Oh my god this is, like, the last way I expected this evening to end.’

‘I had my suspicions…’ Gary said, sardonically.

‘We just wanted to go for a quiet drink.’ Darren offered in way of justification. ‘We were on our way to the bus stop when we were set upon.’

‘Theoretically it was a nice idea…’ The sarcastic tone had not lifted from Gary’s voice, and he was still seething with Darren for removing him from the comfort of night’s worth of painting. ‘… We’ll take this opportunity to run home while the coast is clear. Once again, thank you sincerely ladies, for your gallantry.’

‘We were thinking of going for another drink on the way home…’ Mary nudged Claire for agreement. ‘If you’re worried they might come back, we could chaperone you..?’

‘Oh no…’ Gary tried to wave away the offer.

‘We would love to!’ Darren replied loudly, then turning to Gary in a hushed voice: ‘We’ll be fine if we have those two with us - they kick ass!’

That’s what I’m afraid of… thought Gary.

‘Here Seb, take this.’ Joanna said, offering him a badly chipped mug filled with steaming hot coffee. He was now seated in the kitchen hut (which served as the community hub) having been given a guided tour of the Newcomers’ Village. Visitors were always given a warm welcome in the village, which was just as well considering they normally got no welcome at all from Gary. The Newcomers were also busy with their winter preparations. They had the smaller, damper, less-fertile side of the valley, however, they also had the benefit of more manpower.

‘Thank you.’ He replied, wincing slightly at how hot the cup was. The stove was burning, and the kitchen hut was warm and cosy. Greater minds than Gary’s had spent a lot of time insulating the structure, to ensure that no heat was wasted. When the frost and snow hit in earnest, the kitchen became a safe haven for many of the Newcomers, given that so few had the proper insulation. ‘So what made you decide to move out here Joanna?’ Seb asked, whilst trying to find a spot on the table to place his searingly hot cup.

The short grey-haired woman, stopped to consider this. ‘I’ve always lived a holistic life, in touch with nature. We spend so much time with our gadgets, sat in front of screens, it’s not until you strip it all away that you start to feel alive.’

‘Yeah.’ Olivier added. He had been sat towards the back of the room, sipping on a raspberry leaf infusion. ‘I spent so much of my life working for other people, seeing my efforts go towards lining someone else’s nest. But here… every thing I do goes towards the benefit of my family and friends.’

Seb was nodding slowly, watching through the doorway, to where Rik was playing with Madita and Oak in the yard.

‘Obviously it’s not always an easy life.’ Indigo, the partner of Olivier and mother of Oak chimed in. ‘But any stresses and difficulties are real…’ She thought for a second. ‘…if there’s a problem, then the solution is here in the community.’

‘Interesting…’ Replied Seb, who was in full listening mode.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 2:21 am**

DISCLAIMER: Gaelic Gamers is an independents sports blogging website created by four cousins with a common liking and passion for sports of all kinds and is in no way or form affiliated with or organized by any official news organization in the Democratic Republic of Abanhfleft. All statements and opinions posted here are our own and not anyone else's.

Gaelic Gamers
Presents...

The Football Fallacies
with Graham O'Doherty

THAT'S IT, GIRLS; LET'S PACK IT ALL UP AND GO HOME

And there it is. The first loss of the campaign. Frankly, I can't believe that it's taken us this long to get that first loss. Well, that's it, then. Time to pack up everything. This cycle is a total loss. Better luck in the next one. Oh, hello guys, and welcome back to another edition of The Football Fallacies with me, your gay Irishman Graham O'Doherty. But of course I'm kidding about writing off the whole cycle. I am however just as mystified as all of you surely are that it took our team this long to tally their first loss. Usually the NT would lose their very first game right off the bat, but after this great start I'm sure that a fair few of you were all beginning to think the unthinkable. Thank God for those Sherpas bringing us all back down to earth then, yeah?

Boy, that was a tough past few days, I'm not gonna lie. Getting that point from behind against Brenecia was just absolutely unbelievable, but strangely enough it's the game against the Sherpa Empire where I felt the most disappointed. But come on, let's face it. Realistically now, our objective is to be best of the rest. We should be aiming for that third spot in the groups. And that means beating the teams around us, teams like the Sherpas and Terre Septentrionale. We might be able to get results against the top teams like Banija and Brenecia but we just can't count on that. Our objective now must be to beat all of the other teams in the group. A point or three against the Patriots or the Kadongo Kamu are a bonus at this point. Our aims must be for all three points against everyone else.

At the moment though, our team looks shaky with regards to completing that objective. Just as I cannot remember the last time that we had been so dominant against another team when we played Brigantii, I also cannot remember the last time that another team made us into their playthings the way that the Sherpa Empire did to our team last Tuesday. Maybe it was the weather. Maybe it was the local food. Maybe it was the fans. I don't know if football is what all the Sherpas love but there was certainly a very loud and noisy section of fans in the stadium that could give the Green Wall[1] a run for their money. Our fans did their best to match the noise and the displays of the home fans but in the end, they were outnumbered and out-shouted. Maybe that was a factor for us getting so caught off guard in Changsha. I don't know.

Okay, forget for a moment that Banija and Brenecia are in the same group as us. Think for a moment that Abanhfleft, Terre Sep, the Sherpas, and everyone else are the only ones in Group 2. That is a group that we should definitely be topping. I'm not saying we would be top comfortably; heck, I'm all for fighting tooth and claw for the honour of best of the rest because at least the fans are finally seeing the team fighting for something. And that's all that we want, really. As for that "beating the teams around us" thing, well, obviously the Sherpas and Terre Sep are among them. But, in a strange way, perhaps Brenecia can also be included in their number. Banija are just looking way untouchable at the moment and, I don't know. Brenecia actually looked a little bit shaky when we played them. I mean, conceding two late goals to what should be an inferior team... I know that football is always full of surprises (the result against Sherpa Empire being one such surprising result) but you would think that Brenecia would be able to hold on to all three points against the likes of us.

You know what I'm thinking though? I think that maybe losing against the Sherpa Empire was actually the best thing to have happened to our team. I say that mostly because it's finally taken that monkey off their back, the monkey that is people wondering when they will finally slip up. Going on a winning run is all well and good, of course, but once you get one going everyone is sure to wonder when it's going to end and who's going to end it. Perhaps it really is best that we lost against the Sherpa Empire and not against some one-and-done team of scrubs that appear for one cycle and then drop off the face of the multiverse, sometimes even before the current cycle is over. We at least know what the Sherpas are doing and capable of doing; know that they're trying to build up their sports and whatnot in order to become competitive in the wider multiverse. Maybe it really is the best thing that our ladies lost to them instead of some other team like the Atlantic Republic. Brr! Hope I haven't just jinxed us there. And I also hope that we don't go on a losing streak this time around. But what can we mere mortals do when the football gods decide that they want to have fun? Nothing, that's what. XOXO from Graham....

[1] The Green Wall is the name for the group of ultras which always occupies the western section of the Stadium of the Old Forester, home ground of Ludogorets Markovsky. (OOC: Based on Dortmund's Yellow Wall.)

███ABANHFLEFT 2 - 2 BRENECIA
  RUSEV (84')       CIOGACH (25')
BRITT (90+1')       CHENEY (39')

        SHERPA EMPIRE 4 - 1 ABANHFLEFT
DAWANG RAI (16', 44')       SABADO (76')
    LAKPA MEHTA (23')
    DORJI CHONG (32')

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 2:37 am**

It was drizzling in Changsha, dreary weather, but that didn't dampen the spirits of the raucous crowd that poured out of the stadium after the Sherpa Empire's win over Abanhfleft. People cheered and waved flags. Some of them who had had too much chang stumbled around drunk. Sad to say, there were more than a few boorish men making sexist comments about the Fleftics.

Tandi Ammini didn't tolerate those sorts of comments in the locker room. When Sandeep Haider -- who had spent the whole game watching from the sidelines -- started telling his teammates not to get cocky about scoring a bunch of goals against a team of women, Ammini cut him off: "Those women are professionals and so are you! So act like it!" He told the starting forwards, "Don't listen to this ass. You guys were ON FIRE today and you should be really proud of what you did out there."

Meanwhile, in Lukla, the Emperor's ill health had reignited the controversy over his daughter's marriage to Debashish Morrison, the former 3rd baseman of the Darjeeling Green Sox. Debashish was the son of an English immigrant and a woman from the Southeast who had no noble blood whatsoever. Princess Yahia had said she was willing to give up her place in the line of succession, so that she could be free to marry him regardless of his pedigree (or lack thereof) -- but this had never been made official. The marriage had been allowed to go ahead without fully resolving the question of whether Debashish would be allowed to inherit the throne. While the current Emperor was in good health, it hadn't seemed very urgent, but now that he had fallen ill, it needed to be settled.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 2:55 am**

Nephara 5 - 4 The Macabees
(4-4-2) 1 - Mercator; 2 - Sanger, 5 - Thorn, 22 - Anderson, 3 - Close (c); 7 - Kuepper (13 - Saroszi 54'), 15 - Rauch, 21 - Moxham (8 - Chalk 67'), 11 - Strongbow; 9 - Hawke (14 - Laiota 74'), 10 - Metzger (s/o 72')
Goals: Moxham 8', Strongbow 22', Metzger 47', Saroszi 66', Laiota 79'

"No, go on. Recite what I told you."
Eleven-year old Kurtis was dutiful. A bit rough around the edges, and rarely in class, but most of the adults in his life had found that he could respect individuals. "I don't know who you are."
"Correct."
"I'm coming alone from home. I tell everyone Aunt Morgan is my ... my ... ?"
"Guardian. Yes. But only if pressed."
"But only... if..."
"If you have to answer." Laura Martell nodded. "Good lad."
Kurtis vibrated with questions. One let slip, the most important for any child. "But why?"
"It's for the best, dear child. I know your potential. I know you're going to rise straight to the top. Others... others might not see what I see. I'm just not gonna take any chances with that."

"Two cheap chances. Two soft goals!" bellowed Daniella Strauss, hauling Laiota back into the here and now. "We should be all over these cunts! The fans, they expect that, they deserve it!"
The players seethed. The passion was there. But shit happened, and it had happened twice, cancelling out a sprightly solo effort from Chimera Moxham and a rather more routine far-post header from Strongbow. Then again, maybe Begora Listenaicher was excoriating her charges for two 'soft' goals of their own.
Strauss cracked her knuckles. "Go out there again, go out and be better. Quick off the mark. Fans aren't happy. Get 'em happy, they're the ones paying your bonuses. Go."
And that worked out well. Reminding Nepharim of their purses tended to push the right buttons. A brilliant cross clicked over the top from Marcin Close, Hawke knocked down, Metzger swept home past Jer'Voos, 3-2.
Fresh substitute Monako Saroszi made it four, soon enough after - by then, Strongbow and Moxham had already come close to rolling up the scoreline, but then, Hesterine Mercator had gone some way to unblotting her copybook with two sharp saves from Damrek Yusen.
Unfortunately, Aristide Metzger's next impact on the game was less constructive. Specifically, it manifested as... well... an enthusiastic interpretation of defending from the front. Apparently this meant defending Komoro Wael's kneecap from having to face front, by a sharp application of studs.
Strauss threw up her hands as the red card flashed. "Oh, for fuck's sake! Never a-- who am I kidding, that tackle was filthy."
"The fans don't like it."
"Yeah, they're our fans, Monica, but thanks for that. Fuck's sake. Get me... get me, uh..." Strauss looked back towards the substitution she was planning. Tawny Shone, destructive force per excellence, preparing to replace the exhausted Ferena Rauch after a 6/10 performance with the same sense of timing as Metzger's tackling.
"Estrella's dead on her feet," Monica Brightwater mused, but pointedly.
Strauss' eyes flicked towards the Godhead, without knowing why. "Tawny, sit down!" she barked. "Kurtis!"
"Boss!" Bastable stepped up instantly, and--
"Not you. Laiota! Warm up, and fast. You have until the next stoppage of play."

The rangy figure of Lukas Constantine shifted under his heavy coat. Crisisbless' weather was notorious, arid-cold squared. Too dry even for winter snow. "Talk to me, Laura."
The hard-butch figure coaching the Constance Park youth side grinned up at him. Word had spread. Constantine was one of the many arms that Crisisbless - club, not city - used to keep a stranglehold on all the best youth talent in the city. There were plenty of other professional sides in the city, especially with the recent formation of the national Third Division, but to someone of Martell's limitless ambition, Crisisbless-the-club were the only game in town.
"Great, you're here. I was busy arguing with that fuck," she pointed to some guy stalking the fringes of the terrible, weirdly sandy pitch, "who reckons his kid's got a God-given right to play."
"Yeah? He got a point?"
"Yeah, maybe. But we got a no-dickheads policy. Even at youth level."
"Mm. So, who else?"
"Reckon we could have a couple pros here. Wheaton? Sasha Wheaton? She's in the 8, got her playing attacking mid. Sharp, got good feet. But I bet you knew about her already, she ain't no secret. Already had guys from United, Goodfeather, Athletic, they all came to me to talk about Wheaton. You know Wheaton."
Constantine chuckled. "Yeah, I know Wheaton. Her parents here today?"
"Parent, singular. The femme hanging out behind their goal, dyed-red hair... ?"
"Yeah, I see her."
"She's a good kid. Again, no dickheads. Mother seems level-headed, not too many pound-signs in her eyes. Maybe she doesn't realise her kid's a cash cow."
"Good," said Constantine, a little bleakly. It beat its equal and opposite reaction.
Some kid from Park's U11s took an air-swing at the ball, fell over and looked like he wanted to die.
"Fuck's sake, Artur! Foot through it! Foot through it! Fuck me!" encouraged Martell.
Constantine grimaced. "Yeah, uh. Anyone else good? Not quite on the radar?"
"Keeper's good. Marcel Landry. Too skittish on the ball, not confident enough coming out for crosses, but you know. He's fuckin', twelve, or whatever. You can beat that out of him. Number 5? Con Dryden? He's smashing cunts at this level, but I reckon he's just big. Real test will come when others catch up, you feel?"
Constantine nodded. You saw the type. "Kinda kid who bullies well enough when he's got a few inches on everyone else, but hasn't had to learn how to play the game?"
"Yeah. But that's... well, there's one kid, I guess..."
"Mm-hm." Constantine knew Martell was one of those people who wanted the juicy truth prised out of them. "I'll bite. Tell me."
"I guess... up front, the 9. Kid called Laiota. Kurtis."
"He's a shrimp. And I already saw his first touch, it's like a fucking sledgehammer."
"Yeah, but it's like... the opposite of the Dryden thing, you know? He picks fights he can't win. Fights like-- yeah, chalk on your boots, Netti, that's the way! Fights like this, yeah, g'wan, cross it--"
The cross was swung in, inexpertly. One child stood under it, confident he understood trajectory, and he did seem to have it covered until the Park striker elbowed him out of the way and let the ball fall on his head instead. The technique was inexact - it clonked him obligingly on the scalp and flew out of a goal-kick, but still. When the bigger kid came to get his payback, threw his weight around, Laiota leaned back into him and jutted his chest out, wide, laughing in his face. The referee, a stressed volunteer, blew her whistle a few thousand times and raced over.
Both Martell and Constantine were chuckling merrily by then. "Okay, okay," the liaison from Crisisbless acknowledged, "so he's a fighter, maybe a bit of a heel."
"And he can shoot, too, I promise you. Not on that evidence, but no kid knows how to deal with a ball in the air."
"Sure thing. So... when Brunswick came over. What'd you tell him about this Laiota?"
"Who, the guy from United?"
"Yeah."
Martell winked. "I told him he was shit."

Operation 'start time-wasting and kicking opponents in the shins until the game was over' wasn't off to the best start. Harako Vera, in space she wouldn't have had against eleven, had split open the left wing to find Oravi in plenty more space, triangulated between Strongbow, Close and Anderson. Meaning the first two couldn't stop her driving on the outside of the sluggish third and sliding just outside Mercator's reach for the Macabees' third.
Strauss spat. Laiota's first touch of the ball all game was a kick-off.
Still... it really was something special to come on against the second seeds. A lot of trust, even in a specific circumstance. He might not have been the most talented, or the easiest to work with, or the,
The referee whistled, and booked him for time-wasting over the kick-off. God, lady, can't a man reminisce?
Whatever. In for a penny, in for a pound - he took another couple of pointed seconds before shooting across to Strongbow. The crowd cheered. At least they appreciated an artisan.
Mostly, the Cormorants played cautiously, but ironically one of their cushion goals being stripped away meant they did have to open up more and try and restore that margin, and for that, Laiota made an obvious out ball. Time after time, as the Macabees surged forward, Anderson or Thorn just slung clearance after clearance vaguely his way. He'd charge onto it, he'd shield it, and when he felt a nudge in his back, he'd fall and wait for the referee's whistle. Which wasn't coming easily enough for his liking. He told her this, but didn't press his luck - was already on a caution, after all.
Still, one time it did come, and suddenly there were a lot of green shirts in the box for Chimera Moxham to really take her time to aim at. A lot of tall timber, even at the cost of solidity at the back. They had the legs to cover themselves. They hoped.
One came over the top. High, hard, and not quite close enough to Jer'Voos. He went for it anyway. So did Wael, so did Thorn. All leapt. Jer'Voos, doing his best, slapped the ball wetly into Thorn's neck and Wael's shoulder, none of them able to do anything effectively. But that did leave the ball in no man's land. Two Macabee defenders stood around star-struck, wondering how it would play out.
It played out like Kurtis Laiota, first and most opportunistic of them all, with a bloodthirsty grin plastered on his face, smashing home his first international goal.

Laura Martell was a mildly terrible person who cheated through nepotism to give a late-blooming child an unwarranted chance at a big academy. Nephara was welcome to thank her at any time.

NEPHARIM NATIONAL TEAM SELECTION - FORTNIGHT 4
Goalkeepers: 1 - Hesterine Mercator (Eastweald, COS), 12 - Sigurd Rustwyth (KF Koflir, QUS), 20 - Fasolt Senninger (Creed United)
Defenders: 2 - Rovena Stride (AFC Treason), 3 - Marcin Close (Brinemouth, c), 5 - Roxelana Thorn (Revolutionaries, EUR), 6 - Ilyana Brosch (AFC Corvistone), 18 - Valeri Longship (Crisisbless), 19 - Sander Katarec (Vermillion Rage), 22 - Gabriel Lockheed (AFC Treason)
Midfielders: 4 - Tawny Shone (Sabrefell Moths), 7 - Marica Kuepper (Jungle Strike, VIL), 8 - Malachi Chalk (Falourr, EUR), 11 - Rowena Strongbow (Directus, EUR), 13 - Monako Saroszi (Ulsa, EUR), 15 - Ferena Rauch (AFC Treason), 16 - Morena Deventer (Brinemouth), 21 - Chimera Moxham (Crawford City FC, COS)
Forwards: 9 - Estrella Hawke (Directus, EUR), 10 - Aristide Metzger (AFC Treason), 14 - Kurtis Laiota (Crisisbless), 17 - Kurtis Bastable (Hornchurch, EUR), 23 - Konrad Lovelace (Revolutionaries, EUR)

SCHEDULE
Nephara 1 - 1 Bolgano @ Phoenix Rise (Corvistone)
Monso 0 - 3 Nephara
[Bye]
Nephara 2 - 0 Squornshelous @ Ludd's Hammer (Stahlburg)
Aquitlita 0 - 2 Nephara
Nephara 5 - 4 The Macabees @ The Gauntlet (Treason)
Siovanija & Teusland vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. EOT @ Farham Arena (Sabrefell)
Anthor vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Lochario @ Godswatch (Crisisbless)
Poafmersia vs. Nephara
Bolgano vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Monso @ Ebony Lane (Cranequin)
[Bye]
Squornshelous vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Aquitlita @ The Iron Hill (Vermillion)
The Macabees vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Siovanija & Teusland @ Farham Arena (Sabrefell)
EOT vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Anthor @ The Gauntlet (Treason)
Lochario vs. Nephara
Nephara vs. Poafmersia @ Eagle's Club (Brinemouth)

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 4:40 am**

The Chania Sun
Schedule for Matches Announced
After a glitch in the scheduling system, the schedule for Vdaran matches could not be announced. Not incompetence. Totally not incompetence. Definitely a glitch in the system.
Matchday 7 (Dec. 19)- Vdara v Darmen
Matchday 8 (Dec. 20)- Bongo Johnson v Vdara
Matchday 9 (Dec. 21)- Vdara v Acapais
Matchday 10 (Dec. 22)- Darkmania v Vdara
Matchday 11 (Dec. 23)- Vdara v Equestria
Matchday 12 (Dec. 26)- Vdara v Hapilopper
Matchday 13 (Dec. 27)- Kwangtzu Guānnán v Vdara
Matchday 14 (Dec. 28)- Vdara v Qwakmybush
Matchday 15 (Dec. 29)- Sultanate of Oontaz v Vdara
Matchday 16 (Dec. 30)- Vdara v Nomoterra
Matchday 17 (Jan. 1)- Vdara bye
Matchday 18 (Jan. 2)- Nomoterra v Vdara
Matchday 19 (Jan. 3)- Vdara v Bongo Johnson 
Matchday 20 (Jan. 4)- Acapais v Vdara
Matchday 21 (Jan. 5)- Vdara v Darkmania
Matchday 22 (Jan. 6)- Equestria v Vdara
Again, the issue totally wasn’t incompetence or procrastination of just dumbness in general. It was absolutely a glitch in the system.

Editors Note: there was no glitch, this guy is dumb as shit haha

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 5:41 am**

Princess Kate dressed as Sansa Stark from Game of Thrones and a man in a suit.

Kate:
I'm Princess Katherine Annabelle Dallas for Naked News Jeruselem, we're at home at Dazza Dallas Stadium. Today Jeruselem took on visitors Balqia. I'm with a special guest Wilfred Man from the Mann Network Mann who are our rival network. Apparently he's their football expert. His real surname isn't Mann ...

Wilfred: Nice to be here even if it is on a rival network
Kate: OK I have to ask, what's your football credentials?
Wilfred: I actually used to play football at the club level, but wasn't good enough to get to the World Cup. And got injured too often.
Kate: Oh good, someone who's played football.
Wilfred: It's best left to people more capable.
Kate: Let's discuss other results in Group 11 first. Just to get those out of the way.

Wilfred: Good idea.
Kate: By the way, I'm wearing clothes because the Mann Network doesn't allowed naked women on their broadcasts.
Wilfred: Yeah, it's a weird rule on a network run by men for men ... why Queen Sansa?
Kate: Nothing wrong being a Queen!
Wilfred: I think this girl has more ambitions then she's willing to state
Kate: Taeshan visited Nahkistan and won 3-0. Another win for Taeshan, they are consistent.

Wilfred: I like Taeshan, I know Jeruselem and them have a rivalry but a friendly one.
Kate: Savojarna was at home and beat Welzat 4-0. Well they should have won that game.
Wilfred: They should be doing better than their table position but there's time for them to improve.
Kate: Schottia at home beat TJUN-ia 1-0. Well, TJUN-ia are a bottom team.
Wilfred: You should be winning your home games against such opposition anyway.
Kate: Geektopia won another game, beating low ranked Galar 2-0.

Wilfred: Yes I've been watching them, they are a real threat to us. Even if I can't spell their bloody names. Too Geeky for even me.
Kate: So we played Balqia, and well ended up with a 3-3. Admittedly, we actually should have won this apart from poor defensive effort today.
Wilfred: I've been impressed by our offense, apart from the first game at home that is. Defense, they seemed less confident for some reason.
Kate: We weren't playing Taeshan or Free Republics either so they shouldn't be worried.
Wilfred: It's funny we're not good at home games, maybe playing in front of the home crowd puts additional expection on them.
Kate: Maybe that kind of pressure got them mentally, strikers can win a game but defenders will lose it for you if they fail.

Wilfred: We really should have won this one.
Kate: To the table. Taeshan on 13 points leads. Free Republics who had a bye today, and Geektopia on 12. Jeruselem on 11 back to 4th.
Wilfred: We would have been 2nd if we had won today. So wasted.
Kate: I agree. Schottia 5th on 8, Savojarna 6th on 6 with their first win. Balqia are 7th with 5, nudging TJUN-ia to 8th who are also on 5. Nahkistan and Galar on 4 point. Welzat last on 11 with just one win.
Wilfred: I guess we're doing OK considering things but we could have a lot better.
Kate: Yes, we're due to play a real team like Free Republics and Taeshan so it's far from over.

Wilfred: For sure, there's far more football to decide our fate.
Kate: Now, from your perspective who's doing well and who's underperforming?
Wilfred: The keeper Pablo is doing a fantastic job although today ruined our fantastic record. Fabian's been a great defender but today was an off day. I like young Bran, he seems reliable. They seem to have started well.
Kate: What about the slackers
Wilfred: Sadly your cousin, he's trying hard but not delivering. I know he can do more.
Kate: Yeah that cousin ... anyone else.

Wilfred: I think Lady Dada maybe past her best. I would prefer to play Sansa Starc instead of her.
Kate: Who would you like to see play more games?
Wilfred: Oddly, Daenerys Taragon. Yes she's very pretty but also gives a little more fire to the midfield who can be a bit flat.
Kate: Anyone else?
Wilfred: Jason Massa, he's big and strong and I like he can kinda push opponents out the way. We need more of that as our team have high and strength issues.
Kate: I'd give Cersei Lancaster more time, she's not clean player by any means but she doesn't let much get in her way. Yeah I know she collects fouls a lot. Now, what do think about the stadium changes and well, those pretty girls.

Wilfred: Admittedly, having no space with no privacy isn't my thing. But this is an area which attract the wrong type of person at times. I must admit, the cosplay dressed security guards don't seem as threatening as they used to be.
Kate: Believe me, those girls aren't there just for looks.
Wilfred: I guess it makes the atmosphere more friendly, you have rather unpleasant people in uniform kinda making the place look military
Kate: Anything else?
Wilfred: I prefer the lions statues, the dragons look bit scary.
Kate: That's my family crest. Three heads of that dragon - one each for the three sisters of the original Dallas royalty.

Wilfred: You'd know, where you get those baby dragon caps? The daughter wants one.
Kate: They are in the gift shop. We're out of those, kids think they are cute. I'll give you one, and I'll sign it because ... yeah
Wilfred: Thanks
Kate: Well, thanks to the Mann Network for this collaboration. See you all later. I'll be back to talk about Jeruselem's performance in depth.
Wilfred: Actually I'll be doing the same when I get back ... anyway
Kate: See we're not that different!

Group 11
Nahkistan 0–3 Taeshan
Savojarna 4–0 Welzat
Jeruselem 3–3 Balqia
Schottia 1–0 TJUN-ia
Geektopia 2–0 Galar

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 5:47 am**

Episode One, Chapter Three. Part One [06:58]
Episode One, Chapter Three. Part Two [06:07]

Due to a disagreement with UMG, this chapter appears only on Streamable, which may cause some slower load-times. Please be patient.

All future episodes appear in full on YouTube without having to be partitioned into Part One and Part Two. Touch wood.

Also, the sound quality in the first part is... changeable.

The link mentioned at the end of the video: scroll to the bottom

Previously on The Idiot Project
Episode One:
Chapter One
Chapter Two

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 5:49 am**

The Andromeda Eagles @ Eura
Bastion Stadium
Bastion, Eura
Saturday Afternoon

Dorothy Lee Dandridge was considered a child prodigy. After breaking the school record for goals scored in two years, Dandridge graduated from Athens West High School at age 15. Dandridge had also completed nearly a year of University coursework at the University of Athens. Although classified as a freshman by the ACAA, Dandridge is currently 5 credits short of being a junior at Pickett College.

Dandridge took to soccer just as quickly as she did to academics. She led Athens West to the Southern Regional Tournament in her second year. Despite this, she was overlooked by many collegiate soccer programs due to her age.

Now, Dandridge is the youngest person to ever play on the Andromeda National Soccer Team. She sits on the bench, looking out to the pitch. The Eagles are currently playing Eura. Listed among the Top 10 in the World, Eura is expected to advance to the World Cup this summer while Andromeda is currently in the bottom half of their Group Table.

Dandridge watches the game, but she is also thinking about the reading she has to do for history class. She is pursuing a degree in Social Studies Education. It hasn’t been easy being a student-athlete at the collegiate level, but she has done well enough so far, earning a 4.0 GPA last semester.

---------------------

The crowd cheers as Eura scores their third goal of the half. Coach Jones makes no changes to the lineup despite the Eagles being down 3-0 with more than 10 minutes left.

“What’s she doing,” one of the Andromeda fans asks.

“I think she’s waiting until the second half to put the reserves in.”

“She’s waited long enough.”

Just then, Eura Striker Brian Bond blasts the ball past Rachel Medrano for a fourth Eura goal.

--------------------

Dandridge sits down next to Steve Young. Neither has seen any action and there are just over ten minutes left in the game. Like many of the Andromeda fans in Bastion Arena, Coach Jones has left the game. Coach Zimmerman and Coach Hawkins decide to replace the whole lineup over the course of the next three minutes. After the defenders are all replaced, Zimmerman yells over to the reserve midfielders.

“Dandridge, Height, Lowenthal. You’re in.”

“The comeback begins,” Height says as the three run out to the field.

As Dandridge stood on the pitch, she pondered what Coach Jones said during her halftime tirade. She thought about Coach Jones, whom she didn’t particularly like. Her school, the University of Joppa, has been one of the three best soccer schools in the Allied States long before Meena Jones had anything to do with it. Joppa has always had the best talent.

Coach Zimmerman and Coach Hawkins were different. Both of them came to schools that weren’t especially known for soccer and quickly built what are now two of the new Big Three, replacing Portsmouth and the U of Andromeda.

The players and the coaches on the National Team had all been lucky. They were the big fish in the small sea of Andromeda soccer. Now that they have been thrown into the Ocean of NS Soccer, they see that they aren’t such big fish.

Coach Jones then had the audacity to berate them for trailing Eura as if they were part of the ACAA. She sat and listened to Coach Jones belittle the starting lineup for most of halftime, then they were somehow supposed to overcome their many deficiencies and comeback from a 4-0 half time deficit on the road against a ranked opponent.

Dorothy Lee Dandridge doesn’t like to be manipulated. Nobody does.

So, Dandridge decides that she is going to do her best for the next 10 minutes, if only to prove to herself that she, and her teammates, didn’t deserve what Coach Jones gave them.

“DL,” Hattie Lowenthal yells.

“What’s up?”

“What you doin’ after the game?”

“Listening to Coach Jones pitch?”

“A few of us are going to watch a movie and ordering room service in my room.”

“Is she coming,” Erin yells. “She should come.”

“Hold on. I’m asking her now.”

“Is it about soccer?”

“Well, when he walks down the street,” Lowenthal sings. “All the girls that he meets say he’s…”

“How? That’s not in theatres yet, anywhere.”

“Erin’s got connections. She knows dudes that know dudes.”

“I’m game. I need to detox from football for a few!”

“Good. And DL?”

“What up?”

“Coach Jones can get the Bozack.”

“The B. O. ZACK,” Height adds.

DL smiles. Lowenthal and Height know how to cheer her up.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 6:09 am**

Abanhfleft 2 - 2 Brenecia
(4-3-3) 1 - Farrell; 2 - Broxham (18 - Lonergan 64'), 5 - Horgan, 6 - Mathers, 3 - Quill (c); 8 - Matheson, 4 - Locke (23 - Fallon 86'), 13 - Wheeler; 7 - Cheney, 10 - Ciogach, 16 - Fletcher (21 - Parker 73')
Goals: Ciogach 25', Cheney 39'

Brenecia 2 - 0 Trolleborg
(4-3-3) 1 - Farrell; 18 - Lonergan, 5 - Horgan, 6 - Mathers, 3 - Quill (c, 19 - Tambor 59'); 8 - Matheson (21 - Parker 68'), 23 - Fallon, 13 - Wheeler; 7 - Cheney (15 - Coghlan 74'), 10 - Ciogach, 11 - Keynes
Goals: Wheeler 52', Parker 87'

Ronan Fallon knew, instinctively, that accepting a call-up based on 'spiritual growth' would be ridiculed by basically anyone. So people found it easier to accept he was just chasing the money, like a typical mercenary shag. Doubtless he'd be chasing skirts, too, starting fights, and asking difficult questions just to annoy people.
Fallon didn't mind that characterisation. If anything it was novel, given he'd spent most of his childhood getting shoved around for being a typical knuckle-dragging neesh, happiest in a pit (but a filthy Brenecian pit, not an honest, hard-working Nepharim pit) getting rained on and abused by foremen, businessmen and monarchs.
He did take after his father. With his Gaelic name, his brown eyes and ash-blond hair, it really wasn't difficult to figure out how Brenecia's scouting network had pegged him for a second-generation immigrant. Even if the immigrant had fled to Nephara for a better life, far away. But, well, Marc Fallon was too dead to tell him why, or what it meant to him, so why not?

Fallon was one of those players who just seemed reassuring. Being somewhere in the vicinity of 6'4", broad-shouldered and muscular, towering above rivals in midfield... all tended to have that effect.
He looked like a cynical, brutish hatchet-man, and striding into his first training session that's what he expected - hoped not but expected - everyone to think of him. As his plane touched down in Rozelle, as he stepped out onto Brenecian soil for the first time, as he flashed a Brenecian passport and his decidedly eastern Nepharim accent at a guard while feeling faintly ridiculous, as he stepped out of the airport to be greeted with sideways rain whipping him in the face... well, it all reinforced that this wasn't home, probably wasn't ever gonna be home. And what was he doing here, anyway? And why did they want him? Wasn't he barely scraping into the Newrook team, path practically blocked by Mats Hedlund? It felt ludicrous to be clambering on a plane almost as soon as he got a run of starts. Already, Brenecia felt desperate - would he be here if he were a winger? No. Leftback? No. But Brenecia needed to use the options at its disposal.
"And I appreciate that you are, essentially, a foreigner here," his new manager, Brelk-Xeral Erv, conceded in their first private meeting. "I appreciate your show of faith."
"Sure." Fallon had jumped at the chance. Of course he had. He could have accepted the callup, waited for Shone, Aschenbach, Misidjan, Rauch, Marchant, Rosenthal, Tsiolkas, Bischoff, Reeve, Horvath, Naumoff, Bezemer, Kastriot, Keskin, Luhukay, Pearce, Tallow, Vintner, Jurman and Hooper to all get injured at the same time and hope for the best, or actually had time off from time to time. Actually, the more he thought about the last option... well, too late now, he was here.
"I am curious, though, why did you accept? You snatched at the chance, eagerly."
"Well, I..." Time for half-truths. "Wanted to find out more about myself."
"Uh... huh."
"My lineage. My background. My father."
"The 'Fallon', I assume."
"Uhm. Yes, boss."
"Mm." Brelk-Xeral tapped the desk. "Well, I've talked to your coaches. I know you can be depended on. And I know you're more than the, ah..." They flicked down their tablet screen. "Ah, yes, 'imported shag panel-beater'."
"Uhm," repeated Fallon. It seemed a safe answer.
"The North Hall Star. The Capital Daily has declared you a 'grey-haired fraud'. Ah, and The Brenecian has--"
"Uhm."
"But I mustn't bore you. The point is, I see past that. You're a steady, solid worker - you'll fit in here, with that - but you have a spark of passion within you, that very Nepharim edge to you. A bit of white-line fever. Mongrel. Which is apt, no?"
"Yeah, ha ha."
"But not so much of a conversationalist." Brelk-Xeral leaned back and smirked. "No matter. We'll make a captain of you yet, if we have to."

It had gone fairly smoothly after that. He was accepted fairly quickly by the group, the inevitable hazing was minimal and didn't seem personal. But he hadn't really expected to be given a full cap, until he was there, in the tunnel, against the Atlantic Republic. Or in a serious game, until he was thrown on at home to try and repel Terre. Or given a second call-up, playing the 90 against Casta Marina, or a third, killing off the game against Abanhfleft - winning his first caution just two minutes after coming on! - before earning his fifth cap against Trolleborg.
After it, he swapped shirts with Finnsnes, a worthy opponent, before making a beeline for the exit, before someone shoved a man of the match award into his hands. Okay. And then a Brenecian journalist wanted a soundbite. Dripping with the gentle rain that had spattered the pitch for two hours, he said something about 'going hard for the lads' and 'making up for a slow start' and 'we go again' before escaping down the tunnel.
And apparently, that caught off. Various ex-pats or those with strong ties to the mainland saw this guy, fresh off the Newrook streets, wearing the navy shirt with what passed for pride and playing his heart out, flagrantly flexing his east-coast-Nepharim accent at the media, practically throwing down the gauntlet to those inciting hate against their near neighbours... ! An icon! A sex symbol! His twii.tur inbox overflowed, and he didn't have a PR guy to deal with it, so he just deleted everything. Most were positive, some were death threats. Social Media God would sort them out in Heaven.
Fuck, he was just here for the hell of it, you know? Oh, yeah, and for spiritual realignment or whatever. But that was taking a back foot, because his father's country, it turned out, was weird.

BRENECIAN NATIONAL TEAM SELECTION - FORTNIGHT 4
Goalkeepers: 1 - Cass Farrell (Northern Union), 12 - Opal Cairncross (Marketville, EUR), 20 - Scanlan Pritchard (Marque)
Defenders: 2 - Keziah Broxham (Mallox, COS), 3 - Gethin Quill (Revolutionaries, EUR, c), 5 - Garrett Horgan (Northern Union), 6 - Keane Mathers (Northern Stallions), 18 - Sorcha Lonergan (Northern Union), 19 - Eliwulf Tambor (Northern Union), 22 - Ava Ramsay (Pikemouth)
Midfielders: 4 - Keziah Locke (Duke of the North, PAS), 8 - Elysse Matheson (Hornchurch, EUR), 13 - Corby Wheeler (Goldstaff City, COS), 14 - Isla Ridenton (Jaglan Royals, SRS), 21 - Riona Parker (Galatica, PAS), 23 - Ronan Fallon (Newrook City, NPH)
Forwards: 7 - Lauren Cheney (Kingsgrove), 9 - Niall Bremner (Unioneers, EUR), 10 - Kara Ciogach (Lajuno, EUR), 11 - Setanta Ashvane (Southern Star), 15 - Cail Coghlan (Pikemouth), 16 - Ceridwen Fletcher (North Hall), 17 - Creidne Lindauer (Kingsgrove)

SCHEDULE
Atlantic Republic 1 - 3 Brenecia
Brenecia 1 - 1 Terre Septentrionale
Casta Marina 0 - 5 Brenecia
Brenecia 2 - 2 Banija
Abanhfleft 2 - 2 Brenecia
Brenecia 2 - 0 Trolleborg
Crystalline Caverns vs. Brenecia
Brenecia vs. Brigantii
Sarzonia vs. Brenecia
[Bye]
Brenecia vs. Sherpa Empire
Brenecia vs. Atlantic Republic
Terre Septentrionale vs. Brenecia
Brenecia vs. Casta Marina
Banija vs. Brenecia
Brenecia vs. Abanhfleft
Trolleborg vs. Brenecia
Brenecia vs. Crystalline Caverns
Brigantii vs. Brenecia
Brenecia vs. Sarzonia
[Bye]
Sherpa Empire vs. Brenecia

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 6:13 am**

BRENECIA - TROLLEBORG 2-0
TROLLEBORG - SHERPA EMPIRE

Trolleborg: Kotsson, Levenkrands (Laaste,68), Troger, Dushegub, Wolters, Kolding, Troll (Valgren,56), Koolen, Finnsnes, Kerr (Skaloed,82).

Predictable, but, nonetheless, loss. This is not to say that this time our players played poorly or that opponents showed miracles. Brenecia took three points not without difficulty, but took, and this is what important. Now we are closer to the penultimate place in the table than to the second spot. True, our players forced the favorites to sweat when getting this victory, but were unable to do more. Still, the experience of international games is a great help on the field, as it turned out. Our players conceded goal after the half-time, and, unlike the previous lost game, they still tried to find net, but did not succeed, and conceded another goal at the game final.

The next home game will be held today at the stadium "December 1". 3D broadcasting will begin fifteen minutes before it starts. We remind you that before the celebration of the birthday of the twenty billionth resident of Trolleborg will be broadcast. For those who prefer to gather on the air, two fan zones are organized in the city center, and a large-scale tournament for playing in the World Cup-84 will be held there. Please note, that fan zone at the city core now moved to the Prince Torfinn square, because of ongong preparations for the annual soup festival. Fan zone at the Middle City remain where usually it was. Also, private sector also took part in providing citizens with amenities for watching matches, the owners of the "Shine of Glory" complex invite those who wish for 3D viewing into zones of special comfort, with soft chairs and a snack buffet.

We expect a big influx of foreign fans. Sherpa Empire has a south-west quarter of the stadium in their own disposal. As usual, entrance to the 1st December Stadium is free. All pass tickets available to book, and these unclaimed by guest fans will be handed out to Trolleborg spectators two hours before the game, starting from the peripheral seats.

As for the team, we note the appearance in the two more new players, so from the beginning of the qualification tournament five new faces have already appeared in the squad, and they now began to appear on the field. Let us introduce Torben Bagger, 25-years old defender, agile, fast and making life for opponents forwards very uncomfortable. He is a man of new generation, who preferred not a good old man-marking, but rather play as situation demands. It's remained to be seen, though, is he is a man who will change sorrowful situation in our defence.

Before the game our famous painter Frederick Skovlund present his last piece - oil on canvas painting, which captures the memorable moment when Kerr scores a winning goal in the BoF final.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 6:20 am**

It was a tale as old as time - or at least as old as football. For seventy-five minutes, the Leopards were on par with the infamous Tornado Queendom which previously had handed Reçueçn a surprise defeat. And then there was a single unnecessary tackle with an outstretched leg by Ayité, a red carton, a clever free kick routine by the opposition, a team panicking and doubting between organising or storming forth, … It had fallen apart like a sand castle in a tornado - pun intended. Despite the best efforts, it seemed as if the opposition didn’t even have to try to waltz over and past a Salim Sankaré who for the first time in the campaign looked genuinely hapless.

If you think that a 1-4 loss at home which puts a team in the last place - not just of the group standings but of all 165 nations participating - would already be trouble enough… When the last whistle had resounded, the problems really started. The crowd had been rowdy all night and now attempted to try and take down the fencing which separated them with the pitch. Captain Denké Sesay did an attempt to calm the spirits but realised the futility of his attempts and ran, as the last one, to the dressing room before they closed it from the inside out as a precaution.

As they sat there, locked in, defeated and battered, the silence cut like a knife through warm butter. Someone had turned on a radio feed which reported fights in the streets around the stadium, with cars tipped over and riot police attempting to get control of the situation by whacking their batons into everything which vaguely looked like a human being. “Djalenga is set ablaze!” the commentator concluded, leaving the players alone with their thoughts.

“This is a disaster,” Yaya Ayité whispered, not to anyone in particular.
“No, you played like one,” Madou Moutari snapped.
“Oh, don’t act all righteous,” Ayité retorted, “you left me all alone there, I had to grab a second yellow. F’ing arrogant Dragon.”

Within seconds, two halves of the dressing room stood nose to nose. Those who played for Dragons de Massagui accused Ayité of blowing the game, whilst the others claimed that playing five guys of that team was the root cause of the loss. All eyes, nonetheless were on Akakpo and Diawara who had the most vicious of staring contests. No one contested that one of both had to be the best player, and if not the frontrunner, of the national team - but no one could decisively say whether the Dragons de Massagui one, who had scored on his first start but remained anonymous afterwards, or the Stade Djalenga forward was the top dog.

“This line-up was bullshit and you know it,” Diawara hissed between his teeth.

Without saying a word, Akakpo crashed his skull straight into the nose of his direct opponent, signalling the start of a free-for-all pub brawl. Fists were swung, elbows planted and there were rumours of biting. Tidjani Kabirou, the nominal manager of this ragtag bunch looked apathetic and lost, he just sat there, inactive and absent.

This line-up was bullshit and you know it.

It will be a slaughter.

The nation expects a victory.

“Order! Ordeeeeeeeeeer!”

Faster and faster, the words started to sprint around the skull of Kei Tankary. The assistant manager had been placed next to Kabirou but when the blurring had ended and he came to his senses, he realised that he stepped on top of the massage table in the middle of the room, bounced on the ceiling with his writing board and had screamed like a maniac for order. The twenty-three men stood still around him, some still having a torn-up shirt of a teammate in their hand and others with their fist mid-air.

“I know what’s going on here and we’ll need each of you to avoid a disaster whilst we are in Togonistan.”

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 6:45 am**

HUElavia fall short to Starblaydia

HUElavia once again faced off against a Pot 1 team, only to fall short when it mattered the most. Sao Salvador was home to a difficult defeat that deflated HUElavian momentum throughout the qualifiers to Starblaydia. A 1-3 defeat at the moment still has HUElavia in 2nd, but with the rest of the pack breathing down Los Amarillos' neck.

The match started with both teams playing cautiously to avoid conceding early, until the 20th minute, where a foul by Filho over Rossi allowed Cristiano to take a free kick and slide it under the wall to get past Leopoldi to make it 1-0. Cristiano got mobbed by the squad while the crowd jumped and celebrated to make the stadium shake and rumble from the celebrations. Starblaydia would try to score, with shots being taken by McCloud, Yamaguchi, and Capodanno, only to be blocked by Ricardo. Then, in the 43rd minute, a corner taken by Apelies met the head of Kaumolainen to put it into the net to tie it at 1-1, with the away fans celebrating the goal while silencing the thousands of HUElavians present. The first half ended 1-1.

The second half had Los Amarillos attacking constantly, with Petit and Rossi getting shots in, until the 59th minute, where a counter-attack pass by Eccleston met the boot of McCloud, who slid it past Ricardo to make it 1-2, silencing the crowd even more. HUElavia attacked and attacked, including adding the substitutes of Almeida, Navarro, and Hamada, but it was no use. In the 75th minute, a corner kick was taken by Apelies met the head of substitute Velasquez, who headed it in to make it 1-3. HUElavia kept pressuring after that, but to no avail, and the match ended 1-3, with Starblaydia extending their lead in the Qualifiers.

With the defeat, HUElavia stays in 2nd Place with 12 points, but instead of the 4 point advantage they had, it's now down to 1 point after Mercedini's last-gasp winner against The Sarian, that ended 3-2. Fortunately, HUElavia have a chance to make distance for the next few games, as they will play next on the road against The Ross Isles (349) who are in 10th place, then at home against Folmara (UR) who are in 8th place, and then away at Magnaterrica (252) who are in 7th Place. The disparity of points and ranking should be great for HUElavia who need a confidence boost after the difficult defeat, and need to make the most of these three "easy" games to prepare for the game against Eastfield Lodge, where a direct place in the World Cup may be being played on Matchday 11. Not to mention, this is the best chance to make distance from the rest of the group, which as of now, it looks like the two direct qualifications will be contested by Starblaydia, HUElavia, and Mercedini.

FORCA HUELAVIA! VAMOS HUELAVIA! GO HUELAVIA!

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 7:27 am**

The crowd at Mike Sarzo Stadium in Nicksia was a sellout.

There was a smattering of supporters hailing from Crystalline Caverns, but the next largest number of jerseys in the stands other than the navy-coloured or white with navy wasn't the Stars' qualifying opponents. Instead, there was an entire section near midfield of rainbow-coloured jerseys and people with Delaclav flags on their shirts.

It didn't make much difference in the noise levels at the stadium. With the roof closed because of unseasonably cold temperatures outside that were south of 17 degrees Celcius, decibel levels neared the highest peaks normally found at McVie International Airport just inside the northern borders of Sarzonia's largest city and cultural capital. The cheers reached an impressive crescendo when Jake Campos drew first blood for the host nation in the seventh minute with a laser shot that eluded the diving attempt by the Crystalline Caverns goalkeeper.

Clayton Wilson was watching the proceedings from the players bench and he could swear that the Delaclav section was actually louder than the Sarzonian cheering sections. Not that it was necessarily a surprise. The two countries enjoyed a bond that was unlike most bilateral relationships. In fact, it was often a closer bond than that between most neighbouring countries. Wilson remembered an incident at a bar in midtown Corcorran when some lout from a country he couldn't place began talking smack about Sarzonians. He noticed the growing looks of hostility from Delaclav patrons; a hostility that even Sarzonians often wouldn't have demonstrated. He also noticed two burly bouncers quickly walking up to him to escort him from the bar as they noticed one patron in particular was sizing him up with a glint of lemme see how bad I can beat this motherfucker up in his eyes.

Brady Reynolds would make the score 2-0 during the third minute of first half stoppage time with a beautifully taken free kick that sailed over the leaping Crystalline Caverns goalkeeper. It marked his first point of the qualifying campaign, and it gave the Stars (1-2-3, five points) strong momentum to head into the dressing room. Wilson would sub for Reynolds in the 66th minute and he would notch his own goal in the 79th minute to essentially put the match completely out of reach.

It was a satisfying victory for the Stars, who climb back to level with Casta Marina for eighth place in the Group 2 table ahead of Sarzonia's trip to Brigantii. That would be Sarzonia's last match before their bye in the first half of qualifying. Manager Kevin Connelly said he would give the team the day off from physical training, allowing them to study tapes of fellow former World Cup champions Brenecia before the first matchup between the ex-champions at Joe Gibbs Stadium in Woodstock on Saturday afternoon at 1:35 p.m. Sarzonian Standard Time (AOTC+1).

For one night, though, the Stars could finally feel emotions that had eluded them until now. Joy. Elation. Relief.

They could, for one night, talk about how happy getting three points made them. They could even talk about dedicating this victory to late coach Bryan Ostrom, and imagine him smiling wherever he is in the afterlife.

They could also talk about the rainbow-clad Delaclavs who stayed long after the visiting supporters left the building, celebrating the victory with their northern neighbours.

For one night, it was just like old times.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 7:47 am**

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS GIVEN REALITY CHECK

by Brianne Henry,

After winning the first four games of qualifying, there was a lot of excitement and thoughts that we might find a way to qualify for this thing, after all. Then came this most recent match in Acronius. After a 3-2 loss, Newmanistan has been reminded that they still are an underdog in this group and need a lot to bounce their way if they find a way to sneak into the top two in the group.

Now, before I go any further, please understand one thing, and that it is important. Newmanistan did not play poorly against Acronius. There was nothing wrong with their effort, playing 90 minutes of good football (ack, did I just say football and not soccer as my first instinct? What’s happening to me?! Well, I will leave it in. You know sport I mean!) and certainly understanding that they needed to work hard. If this were a domestic league game in the middle of the season, and your team lost 3-2 with the effort that the Rockets put forth, you would turn off your device, shrug your shoulders, and say something to the effect of, “Oh well, can’t win them all!” or “It’s a long season,” and then go about your business for the rest of the day. You wouldn’t criticize any players or coaching staff. Perhaps you could think of an example or two where if someone made a different choice or move in a certain spot then the result could be different. In Newmanistan’s position in World Cup qualifying, it’s not as easy to dismiss it. The best you can say is “at least they played well.”

Acronius is ranked ahead of us, though they have not started well thus far. The nation ranked #62 in the world, one pot ahead of us, is not ready to give it up after an 0-0-3 start, and have now rolled off consecutive wins. For them to salvage their campaign, a win over the Rockets was a must, and their fans in the stands were letting them know that early. The home squad, using the secret roster strategy, opened up the scoring in the 12th minute and led for much of the first half. Possession and chances were pretty much split during this time, and from the Rockets end of it, the sky blue were rewarded in the 38th on a goal by Tyrone Vannella, and that brought us to intermission all square at one. In the second half, Newmanistan took the 2-1 lead in the 50th minute, hoping the quick strike from Southport’s Derek Schaefer could give the team momentum. Unfortunately, that lead only lasted eight minutes. The ending portion of the match was exciting with both teams getting some great chances to get the go-ahead goal. Schaefer had a particularly great opportunity where he was simply robbed by the keeper in the 75th minute. In the 81st, Acronius got the go-ahead score, and held on from there.

Rockets players after the match were dejected, as one would expect. No one would have considered winning in Acronius something we had to do, but after four straight wins, this is a reality check. Newmanistan’s four wins were all against teams ranked below them. Acronius was the first time they played a team with a better rank, and in coming up short, many will look at the Rockets now and point to their early strong record just being a product of an easier opening schedule. The next match, against 0-0-5 Pius D at The Fire Pit in Centralia will obviously be a must win.

(OOC: I want to point out that if anyone is interested in having one of my players transfer to their domestic league, send me a TG. It would be a good opportunity for them, and would give me something else to talk about in RP!)

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 8:51 am**

Human Nature, Chapter 6
Chapter 1; Chapter 2; Chapter 3; Chapter 4; Chapter 5
OOC: Many thanks to Neph for collaborating with me on this one. Please don't ask me how they understand each others' language. I have no idea. Maybe it was the Godhead.

By the second half, it was pretty clear they were out of their depth. The first three matches had been challenges for Lyyti and the rest of the team, but they'd stuck with it. This was something different. Like the first match against Poafmersia, they'd given up two in the first half. Unlike then, Lyyti hadn't been able to get close to scoring a goal, let alone two. The Nepharim played with a confident ease. Their midfield and defensive lines capably absorbed the pressure the Squornshelans were throwing forward. When we can get the ball off them that is. Lyyti was finding that it sometimes wasn't much fun to be the striker. Like when your team is getting outpossessed by a 2-1 margin. It had probably been close to 10 minutes since she'd touched the ball. The few times she or one of her teammates had been able to break through, Senninger was able to comfortably handle their shots. After Westerveld skimmed one just wide of the post not long after entering play, things had settled down a bit. It seemed like the two first-half goals from Metzger and Deventer were all this game had to offer. Nephara was very much in control of the pace of play.

A few minutes ago though, 'controlling the pace of play' had taken on a new meaning. One of the opposing strikers, Lyyti was pretty sure his name was Laiota, had taken it upon himself to employ gamesmanship to slow things down even further. Dawdling over set pieces and throw ins, standing in the way of every free kick for offside, kicking the ball away. Nothing that would earn him a card, at least not immediately, but he was definitely acting like kind of a dick. Matter of fact he's been kind of a dick all evening, the noisy bastard. 16th in the multiverse and going this hard against an unranked side. It kind of made you think.

I've gone all out these past couple weeks to keep the damned ministry off my back. I keep scoring and that cocky fucker Holmgren won't come near me or my family ever again. She watched from near midfield as Anselmi Voronin won a head against Laiota, sending the ball out over the end line. The center back landed awkwardly though, and went down in a heap, clutching his left knee. What makes that asshole try so damn hard when it's clear this one's basically over? Laiota, to his credit, looked dismayed at the injury, and leaned down to rest a hand on Voronin's shoulder and say a few words. It soon became evident that DOCTOR'S NAME was going to be a few minutes treating Anselmi, and both managers called their teams to the benches for water and tactical instructions. On impulse Lyyti walked out of her way to intercept his path.

"Hey, it's Laiota, right?"

"Yeah?"

"Answer a question for me, ok?"

"Sure?"

"Just wondering what your bosses have on you to make you lot play so hard."

"Huh?"

"I said they must have some heavy shit on you, the way you play."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Y'know. Leverage, consequences, bad shit happens to you and yours if you don't come out here and bust your ass every match. C'mon, one player to another, how they got you kinked?"

"Look, I don't know why you're here. I'm here cause I want to be, this is the greatest honour of my life. I'm here cause I want Nephara to win." He stared at her for a moment, then grinned and added, "The pay doesn't hurt though." Lyyti stared back, trying to formulate a response.

"Lyyti! Get the hell over here!" Lagerkron's voice cut through her thoughts, and the moment was gone. She jogged over to the bench and took the offered water bottle from Lucia. "What was that all about?"

"Nothing. Just talking shit, I don't know."

"You can talk shit after we score, now focus, here's what we're gonna do."

Lagerkron's tactics drifted through Lyyti's mind and found nothing to adhere to. What a jerk. Spouting off patriotic bullshit like that. She probably shouldn't have expected any different. Why should he share anything with her? Still they were both athletes in the same situation, weren't they? And he hadn't just been quiet about whatever the Nepharim football bigwigs had on him, he'd completely denied the idea. Could they really just be out here because they want to? She looked around at the defenders keeping tabs on her, as if their faces could somehow tell her what was going on in their minds. Lyyti didn't think there was a single player on the roster who would've been her if they'd had any choice in the matter. The greatest honour of his life? Sure. This was a proper national team of course, not a hastily recruited band of misfits. Lyyti still longed to find out why it had been necessary to put together a team at the last minute, entirely from religous objectors to body augmentation. Their lack of implants was the key, of course, but she hadn't been able to get a word out of anyone on the subject. This lot are probably modded up to their eyeballs and totally bought in to whatever their government spouts. It was the only explanation that made any sense. Still, his confusion had seemed so genuine. Not many footballers were that good at lying. Could they have some kind of neural implants to make them more loyal, like Holmgren threatened with Lilja? It was a lot to think about.

"Lyyti!"

Again, a shout interrupted her.

"What?!"

"You're coming off, get moving!"

She jogged to the touchline toward a stormy-looking Lagerkron. "I don't know what's gotten into you Vang, but you need to get your head straight over the bye. Don't let me see you chatting up any more opponents."

Lyyti nodded vaguely and took her seat on the bench as Bykov sprinted on to replace her. From his seat nearby in the stands, Holmgren was scowling down. Can his face even make any other expression? She tuned him out, along with everything else. Staring at her feet, she continued to go over Laiota's words, looking for the tells that would give away what he really meant. It just doesn't make sense.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 10:37 am**

De BondSaari 2 - 3 Moseudini
'12 W. Pauwelz
'18 W. Buul (PEN)
'21 J. Brindliev
'60 D. Dostalok
'90+2 D. Dostalok

The Sarian Line-up (4-3-2-1): Oodel Duoztiun -- Randoel Raedmaeceu, Jaxon Pieuz, Zej Zamuuol (Bruux Ziebruux, 70), Epi Koemanz -- Luc Bisop (Bloem Auteberi, 70), Jodi Lauri, Lizett Aucs (Nicau Noriuz, 45) -- Wictor Buul, Maeri Beniut -- Wera Pauwelz

The Sarian vs Mercedini: Our Writers Give Their Verdict

Rens De Veen
It is tempting to say that the team were unlucky, but shocking yourself by getting ahead and then hoping you can cling on isn't a game plan.

I will start off with the positives: the more attacking set-up looked much better, and allowed Wictor Buul - by far the best Sari player on the pitch - to shine. Constantly, he was playing balls in to Wera Pauwelz and it is a credit to Daniel Hosset in the Mercedini goal that she only managed to score once. Indeed, he both won and scored the penalty which put The Sarian two-nil up. Now for the negatives: almost everything else. The Sarian were lucky to get ahead, against the run of play. They were then even luckier to double their lead, against the run of play. And then then had no idea what to do next - fans were forced to watch seventy minutes of the lead being deservedly eroded away. It has been written previously that The Sarian don't know what to do once they fall behind, it seems that they don't know what to do when they take the lead either!

Lien Kindvandonkel
It could have been great, for the want of a little luck

Saying The Sarian were unlucky could seem like I am placing my partisan cards on the table, and that might be right. Yes, it is fair to say that both goals came against the run of play - but I don't know what people expect against a statistically superior side. Doubling down, I might even assert that the underdog scoring against the run of play is the sign of a tactical triumph - the team was certainly set up to counter-attack with Wictor Buul and Maeri Beniut being the natural wingers for such an operation. Detractors seem to then think that Mercedini would take going two-down at home lying down - of course the side would have to spend the rest of the match bearing the brunt of the Golden Eagles attack. What do people expect? And it very nearly worked - we were one deflected shot in the ninety-second minute away from my dismissive colleagues writing long columns about the miracle at the Zoloroni Sports City Stadium. Alas, it was not to be.

Micha Sigeuz
Unlucky or undeserving? It doesn't matter, we still lost

As with all debates, it takes an awful lot of self-control to stay out of them. Whether The Sarian were unlucky to lose or would have been undeserving in victory, the only thing that matters is the score: The Sarian lost. Again. I understand the argument that nobody could reasonably expect The Sarian to have set the world on fire, but picking up just two points after a quarter of their qualifying games have been played is disappointing. Across the multiverse, much worse teams playing much scarier teams have done much better. Languishing in last, on two points is simply not acceptable. It is perhaps too late to change much mid-qualifying, but the powers-that-be should already be thinking of a strategy to ensure that this does not continue to happen. Better teams or not, we should not content to being pushovers. I don't care if we're lucky, I don't care if we don't deserve it. I do care if we win.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 11:23 am**

Bears Armed vs. Razenta
Venue: (Razenta)
Score: 1-1.

Goals
Bears Armed: Scarlett (#26) @ 37’ (assist: O Redwood [#37]).
OPPONENT: H. Golodiva @ 86’ (assist: R. Tolokovsa).

Red Cards
(none)

Substitutions due to Injury
(none)

__________________________________________________________________________________

Location: ‘NorthPort National Stadium’, at NorthPort (Well where else could it be?), in Bears Armed’s ‘Northlands’ portion.
The date: Three days after the match against Razenta, later afternoon, after a lengthy training session.

__________________________________________

( Lurrssee Fane) “Urrgah! I can understand the coaches deciding that we need to get used to local conditions here again after playing all of our other “hrreal” games so far either at Wimbley or ‘away’, and that we need to be as good as we can to win as many more games as possible, but couldn’t they have given urrs even a single day off back in Council Groves before sending urrs up here?”

( Steffannee Bruin) “Ayyuh, for true. Hwhen the plane touched down on Ursine soil again at Kerroy’s-denn ⁽¹⁾ I was so rrelieved, even though the flight back from Razneta had been a bit less turbulent than the one going out there… So hwhen they told us we had just a single watch to take it easy, and then we’d be flying north…”

( Karra Brent ) “In a different plane, though, not one of the ones that had been through those storms…”

( Lurrsee) “Standard practice… at least, it would be in commercial aviation if the High Council ever decides to re-legalise that, anyhows.”

( Karra ) “Says the she-bear hwhose dream carer, before she found her place in the Belles, would have been as an air hostess?”⁽²⁾

( Lurrsee) “Ayyuh, well, I wanted to travel… and I’m doing that now, with the Belles, for true!”

( Steffannne) “Not that Razneta would be high on my list of desirable countries to visit…”

( Lurrsee) “Nor mine, neither, for true. “Still, at least ourr plane being diverted to a small airfield in Valanora due to those serrious storms on the outbound flight meant that we didn’t have to spend too much time there…”

( Karra) “But of course it also meant that, owing to the mix-up in assigning places, it was basically the Belles’ ‘second team’ line-up hwho played in that qualifier — no insult intended, Hannorra — because the rest of urrs only arrived too close to kick-off to be recoverred from the journey and hrready for play.”

(Steffannee) “And even that line-up was enough to get the first goal, thanks to Hannorra herself, and to maintain the lead almost to the final whistle.”

(Karra ) “Ayyuh, but only ‘almost’… Hrright?”

(Hannorra Scarlett ) “Ayyuh, right.
“Maybeso we were getting a bit too confident after fending off those so-called ‘Blue Wolves’] — Urrgah, why did it have to be 'Wolves’? ⁽³⁾ — so well until that point, although — hokay — their own heavily-defensive style helped urrs a bit with that as well, but I think that it was the crowd’s sheer hostility that wore some of urrs down…”

(Karra) “Fair enough, I suppose. Anyhows, now we hrreally need to beat Port Ember if our qualifying challenge is going to hrremain very plausible: Razneta was one of the teams that we were widely expected to beat, on the basis of rrecords so far, after all.”

(Hannorra Scarlett ) “Although some of those expectations were probably based just on Razneta being ‘Unranked’ like urrs, rather than already experienced at the international level…”

(Lurrsee) “So now we play against Port Ember here, a team named after a port in a port…”

(Steffannee) “Feeling superstitious about ‘ominous coincidences’ again, are you? Huhuh!”

(Lurrsee) “Not superstitious: That coincidence might give their players a psychological boost.”

(Steffanne) “But the probable weather here won’t…”

(Hannorra) “Oh? Warm even for the time of year, and clear skies forecast for the day of the match — not even any of the mists that can happen along this coast in summer. So, what sort of conditions are Port Ember’s players more probably used to?”

(Lurrsee) “I know that: Tropical conditions…”

(Hannorra) “Ahah! And they’’ be arriving here without much time in which to acclimatise. Ayyuh, that could work in our favour… if they haven’t already got used to playing in a bit cooler conditions than they’d have back home during their earlier games in these qualifiers.”

(Steffanne) “So, maybeso, coincidence — in the forrm of it being them hwho the schedule sends here to the north — might actually favour urrs instead?”

(Hannorra) “Ayyuh.
“Hr’rmm, it definitely was coincidence rather than a deliberate ‘strategic’ choice by BAAS, hrright?”

(Karra) “Ayyuh, for true: The press had been told, before the draw, that it would be the middle ‘home’ match in each half of the qualifiers that got played here, unless that was against the group’s top seed.”⁽⁴⁾

(Hannorra) “I can smell that we have to play at least one qualifier here, for political reasons… but, looking at the relative populations of the Northlands and the Mainland, one out of the full eight-and-two home games — rather than one in each five — would seem fair enough.”

(Karra) “That’s politics for you. At least this time, all of the ‘Mainlands’ matches are at Wimbley and we don’t have to go to WestPort as well for one or two games as some earlier Bear-Belles squads did…”

(Hannorra) “Ayyuh. That was a detail in the histories that I found rather confusing — even on top of the whole timeline for the Bears’ international sporting history apparently having been “retconned” to different dates, for true!
“More politics, to please Clan WestWoods in particular and maybeso some of its neighbours on that side of the High Ranges, was it, do you know?”

(Karra) “It was partly that, ayyuh, but apparently also just that WestPort United were having such a successful time in the league back then that hwhen they offered their own New Grafford as an alternative to Wimbley — hwhich was a new stadium itself, back then, rremember — BAAS felt obliged to take them seriously.”⁽⁵⁾

(Steffanne) “Urrgah! WestPort United…
“Wiston! Wiston! Wiston!”⁽⁶⁾

(Karra) “Ayyuh, Steff, we know."

(Lurrsee) “Hr’rm. So, maybeso it’s a good thing for urrs that New Grafford is undergoing a major hrefurrbishment this year?”

(Karra) “Ayyuh, maybeso… although hwhether they’ll apply to host a game next year, if it’s ready on time…”

(Steffannee) “Or hwhether ‘WestPort City’ suggest that as they won the double last season their stadium should be used instead…”[sup(7)[/sup]

(Your view of this discussion, as an observer from beyond the ‘Fourth Wall’, fades to black…)

(In the same far-away cave that I mentioned last time, the somewhat-draconic figure discards a broken quill pen and an empty sack that is labelled ‘Storms’ and seems to be considering which item out of several that are heaped together in one corner it will use next…)

_______________________________________

OOC Footnotes

1. Kerroy’s-denn is the aerodrome closest to Council Groves. It is situated a few miles north-west of Wimbley, which itself is several miles north-west of the actual city.

2. Air-hostess was the career originally ascribed to DC Comics’ character ‘Lucy Lane’ (younger sister of the more famous ‘Lois’), on whom this Ursine character is [OOC] loosely based…

3. Both the Bears and Hannorra’s own [i]Vulpine people had some bad history with Chaos-tainted, sapient, semi-anthropomorphic Wolves. Although that war ended centuries it had lasted for centuries before that, and was waged without mercy on either side (with two other sets of “talking peoples” [apparently] having been destroyed completely by those ‘Wolfen’ before their first attack on the Bears), so that “the Wolves” are still a commonly-referenced ‘bogeyman’ here.

4. I really had decided that before seeing the group schedule, and Port Ember’s details, honest!

5. Anybody with an interest in RL English football should probably be able to guess the parallels for ‘WestPort United’ & their stadium at ‘New Grafford’…

6. There’s a historical rivalry between WestPort and Steffannee’s hometown of Wiston City, although at the footballing level WestPort United’s main rivalry is with nearer neighbours ‘WestPort City’ rather than with either of the two Wiston-based teams (for one of which, ‘Wiston City’, Steff herself plays when not on ‘international’ duties).

7. “won the double”: For any of you who aren’t completely familiar with British football terminology (If there are is anybody here for whom that is the case?), this means that they topped the League’s highest division on points and won its most prestigious Cup.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 11:43 am**

TJUN-ia Update: I Guess We Can Be Competetive?

Handon provided the backdrop to another disappointing night for TJUN-ia. Schottia and the Jaguars both had a good defence, troubling the other's offence. But it was home-field advantage for Schottia, as Jack Avelione showed in his 73rd minute winner, as The Jaguars left the Harbour Hill stadium with a feeling of deja vu of their previous match against Jerusalem.

The result leaves us in 8th place, with the leaders still in reach. Davis Seems provide no comment for tonight as his is busy trying to improve our strategy for our next game: in TJUN-ia City against Geektopia, ranked 104th.

Elsewhere we had the shock of the tournament so far Group 6, as 2nd ranked defending-champions Equestria lost 2-0 at home to 71st ranked Hapilopper. Meanwhile in Group 14, unranked Hampton Island smashed Tangu 7-3. We would like to ask Hannah Sanders, the manager of the Golden Bears, if she would like to share any tips but that might be considered cheating.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 11:50 am**

Vakolicci Haven and Celeria 0–1 Flavovespia

In a surprise for Flavovespia, Group 8 and for many mans in the world, Flavovespia took their first win of the campaign, away from home against Vakolicci Haven and Celeria. 72 spots separated the 2 sides in the KPB rankings, but Flavovespia overturned that and the home advantage to come out 0-1 winners.

It was all change for Flavovespia, as for the first ever time, they weren’t managed by Nick Cole, it was interim manager Marcus McCormick in the dugout. They were also lined up in their black away shirts, with the black home shorts and socks to go with them in this away fixture. A change in formation as well, a back to basics 4-4-2 for Flavovespia.

It seemed to be working. Vakolicci Haven and Celeria seemed to have the edge in terms of possession, but for a lot of the opening exchanges, could do little but move the ball around between Flavovespia’s 2 banks of 4. The solid defence of the visitors was a thorn in the side of the hosts. That’s not to say they have no shots on target, and the recalled Meehan did have to work a few times, but nevertheless, Flavovespia looked comfortable at the back.

Flavovespia seemed more defence focused and were limited in their chances, but in the 28th minute they took a surprise lead. Steven Hall on the right wing made an advanced run. He pulled the centre back out towards him, and then played a great through ball into the space vacated for Barkes to run onto. He kept his head down, and timed his shot well, with finesse to beat the keeper and into the back of the net. 0-1 for the visitors. The #20 was becoming a breakout star of this cycle, a rare bright point so far.

Vakolicci Haven and Celeria weren’t prepared to give up, and began to push harder to get a goal in this game. Nevertheless, their passion wasn’t matched by their ability, and repeatedly that last ball would fly out of bounds or straight to a Flavovespia defender. At half time, it would be 0-1 to Flavovespia.

In the second half many thought the hosts would be the dominant side, however they seemed to be really struggling for ideas. If anything Flavovespia were playing better, and looked like they had the potential to score another. Both Feld and Hall cut in from the wings and had decent shots parried away. Despite playing a typically deeper position than they were used to, the wingers were having a good games.

Vakolicci Haven and Celeria had their best chance in the 70th minute. Their #9 got goalside of Neil Wright, and drove a low shot that Meehan did well to parry. James got their first, and hooked the ball out of touch, and the resulting throw-in would come to nothing. As the minutes ticked on, their was a growing sense that Flavovespia could win.

By the final few minutes, it was clear Flavovespia were keen to hold on. With Pitchford on for Maddox, Jensen on for Holt, and striker Daley off for midfielder Wolfson, there was little attacking intent. That didn’t stop Hall’s speculative long ball forward on the stroke of injury time falling to Barkes, but the covering defender and keeper did enough to sufficiently narrow the angle and block the shot. For Vakolicci Haven and Celeria, they couldn’t break down the Flavovespia defence, and the visitors would come away with their first win of the tournament, and a debut victory for interim manager Marcus McCormick.

A win in a game many put down as a draw, and Flavovespia begin to look to build on that. Coming up next however is the 3 game gauntlet, South Covello (H), Qasden (A) and Filindostan (H). It would take a lot to see Flavovespia end the winning streak, currently at 5 games, of the current group leaders and #3 in the World, South Covello. As of yet, there isn’t a decision on the next permanent manager.

A History of Football in Flavovespia

Part 5

With the 74BU Gold Cup exciting the nation, the tournament expanded. With up to 128 teams, a random draw (minus the Big 3) would decide which teams needed to play in Round 1, before the 64 team Round 2. Other than that, there was little change to the structure of the Gold Cup. The random draw was somewhat frustrating for teams who did well the previous season put found themselves in Round 1, but it was otherwise the fairest option.

After the relative success of Denman Factory last season, they made it to the quarter finals, but were deated once again by Waldster. However thanks to the draw and Loxthorpe FC knocking out Hadford Hill, Baxlee-Butterfield became the 2nd non Big 3 side to reach the final, although they lost to St Astons City 3-1. Carston Green followed them up in 72AU with a final loss, before an all Big 3 final in 71BU, where Waldster thrashed St Astons City 5-1.

70BU was an important year for the Gold Cup. Now into it’s 10th running, 84 teams were accepted as entrants to the competition. Amateurs and factory teams still made up many of them, however the mid-sized regions and cities began to have their own professional teams as well. Furthermore a small split was forming between “true” amateur teams, and teams where players were receiving some form of payment for their services.

The tournament itself nearly saw a shock in Round 2, when Caffchin narrowly lost at home to St Astons City. Unlike Waldster and Hadford Hill who made light work of their opponents, St Astons were nearly defeated in embarrassing fashion. Hadford Hill were dominant in their first 3 games, winning 1-12, 8-0 and 11-0 However in the quarter finals they also required extra time to get past Blessed Order, who were a surprise in this Gold Cup. St Astons City and Carston Green had narrow victories to progress to the semi finals. Waldster however didn’t. Against the unfortunately named in this case Waldster Football Excellence, they won by an incredible 16-0. A result that was so extreme, there were even allegations of match-rigging, although that has since been suggested as more likely to be a myth.

Carston Green FC however proved, much, much tougher opponents for Waldster. So tough in fact, the visitors lost 5-1 in a result very few could scarcely believe happened. Carston Green then faced off against Hadford Hill in a final in Waldster. A match that captivated audiences across the nation, a brilliant display by Joshua Anderson gave Carston Green a 4-3 AET victory. They had done it, the first ever non Big 3 side to win the Gold Cup, breaking down the wall and showing it was possible. Joshua Anderson himself would go on to become a legend of Carston Green, but that’s a story for another time.

In Waldster however, a few teams were beginning to see an opportunity. Although the Gold Cup was strong, there were few opportunities for big games and money-spinning matches. Owners and managers got together to discuss the solution to this, and soon another new tournament was born.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 12:26 pm**

WRECKERIA FACING SOME TROUBLES
By Bill Prescott, Wreckerian Sports News

For all intents and purposes, the Wreckerian Football Team expected they wouldn’t have much of a shot against a team like the Holy Empire, a team attempting to make its 55th World Cup finals. The Holy Empire has fielded a team, for the most part, since the very first World Cup and has won the event in the past. But a 5-1 drubbing of the Bulldogs? Dave Simmons and Marvin Byrnes expected better than that.

Simmons, the head of the Wreckerian Association of Soccer, shuddered when asked about the 5-1 defeat. He said it was evident that the team from the so-called “Knights of the Oblong Table” had outclassed the Bulldogs, and that it wasn’t even going to be close. But he had hoped for something better.

“The fact is, they knew what they were doing and we didn’t,” Simmons said, sitting back in his chair in his cramped Halsted office. “You ever seen a jackass run against a bunch of thoroughbreds? That’s what we were. Obviously we need to step up our game, and we need to focus on the task at hand if we’re going to not completely embarrass ourselves, you know?”

It almost seemed as if Simmons had lost sight of the fact that Wreckeria had not fielded a team in 54 years, and was starting a football program almost from scratch. When he was reminded of that, he told WSN that that wasn’t even important to him.

“I don’t really care that this is the first team in 54 years. We started off strong. We knocked off Mareibat in our first match, we tied Quincy, we can play well, and I know we’re capable of good things. I know we’re building a football program off from scratch, but the fact is, we’ve already got some great players.”

Some of those he mentioned were Claude Tindall, who was breaking through as a star for the Wreckerians; Sig Justice, who won the hearts of more than a few Wreckerians by playing hurt; and Harold Leslie, the goalkeeper, who, in spite of letting in more than a few goals, has maintained a can-do attitude throughout the qualification period.

Other players were praised by coach Byrnes, who admitted that this qualifying run has been as much as a struggle as he expected.

“But at least we’re not last,” Byrnes said with a chuckle. “You know, we’ve been mid-pack for most of the run, so I think what we’ve done is we’ve exceeded expectations. There’s still more than half the qualifiers to go, and we can win some more matches. Look at our defense. They’ve had some troubles as of late, but god damn if they’re not playing with heart. They’re going to be there until the very end, and they’re going to fight, regardless of the circumstances.”

Even if they’re not last, they’re still not first, except in one category – goals allowed. Through six matches, the Wreckerians have given up 22 goals, more than any other nation in any group in this World Cup qualifier. The team has only scored 13 goals against those 22, and they sit 10th of 11 teams in the qualifier, with only the hapless Volinovia sitting in last place.

Simmons, however, isn’t worried about those stats.

“We’re not going to be Vilita or Hapilopper right off the bat,” he said. “It’d be stunning if we were, but everyone’s got to start somewhere. At least we’ve gotten off to a better start than a lot of teams, you know? Hell, a lot of teams don’t even have a win. We do.”

Simmons is right. A number of teams – Aimena, Islas Aaland, Pius Desurongcrandis, the Atlantic Republic, the Sarian, Barsland, Guadalajara, Monso, Bongo Johnson, Mustardy, Squrnshelan Remnant States, Furby Island, Volinovia, Libonesia, Mkabia, Alenburg, Castanya and Grod Island have yet to pick up a match victory in this World Cup.

“And that, my friends, means we’ve started off a lot better than a lot of teams,” Simmons said with a smile. “We’ve got more wins than 18 teams in this World Cup. I’d like to make that number increase, too.”

The Wreckerians are playing the team from Freeport for their next match. Freeport, ranked 65th in the world, has had a very disappointing World Cup qualifier and ranks 8th in the group, with one win, one draw and three defeats.

“I think it would be a fantastic opportunity for us to leapfrog those guys and get some momentum going,” Simmons continued.

It would certainly be nice.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 12:31 pm**

The soft music playing in the background and the dim lights made the restaurant seem perfect at the beginning, but when the first security personal arrived the mood was instantly destroyed, and only three players were there. Since they didn’t lose to Jeruselem the Ministry thought that a day for resting was appropriated for the players. However, the discussion to decide where they should go and how to spend the day split the Team in several minor groups, each one in one side of the city. This one was composed of Torfin, Petre and Miklos Luqin.
-I can’t believe, there are three of them for each one of us!
Petre was pretty concerned about that, growing in the countryside he enjoyed some liberty that most people in urban regions are not used to. Not being watched twenty four hours a day was one of those.
-You forgot bout the one in the bathroom, and the other in the front doors, and the one in the kitchen, and the on in the roof, and the…
-We understood Miklos, shut up.
Torfin raised his voice, he was very easy to anger, and the constant stress didn’t help him to calm down.
-For God’s sake, why do they make such a fuss because of some players? We just want to eat some food in peace. One guy would be enough.
-We all know, Petre, - said Torfin. -but since the the “incident” in the first Cup the government is two thousands time more paranoid with… well, everything.
Their food arrived and the everyone stood in silence for some seconds, but when the waitress was preparing to leave Miklos called her.
-Wait, could you bring me a beer, please?
He asked in his best Jeruselemite, the waitress took a while to understand, but after a while she noted the request and left the three players alone.
-What did you asked for?
Petre was already eating his noodles, so his question was a bit harder to understand.
-A beer.
Miklos answered with a whisper, but it was enough to cause his teammates to choke with their food.
-Are you crazy?- asked Torfin, drinking some water – If we got caught they will send us directly to some Working Camp in the north. Tell her that you made a mistake and wanted juice instead! Now!
Some guards were staring at them, it wasn’t loud enough to hear, but Torfin’s raising voice tone surely was enough to attract attention.
-Hey, hey, calm down.- Petre calmly said -Technically drinking isn’t outlawed, only owning alcoholic drinks is forbidden by law… and I think it is just to experiment, we owned it after all!
-And what o you know of laws? You are a football player!
-But my father is a lawyer.
-Fair enough!- Said Miklos with his booze in hands. He filled three cups and gave one to each player. - Cheers! For not being a lame Team!
-Cheers!
The other two replied, Petre more enthusiastic than his friend… This repeated for eight times, the last one with vodka.
-I will tell you something. -Miklos was sleepier than normal -We could’ve won, but… this guy, Sanzor… he is retarded. I saw it! He had an open pah towards the goal in the last minutes, he could’ve done an wonderful goal… but he 0just passed the ball to someone… He did that other times too… If I remember well…
-Yeah, when they announced him as the main right middle I was... like “what? Are you serious?”. This guy plays in a team from Slavoq, I don’t even know where this lace is, but I am sure that it is a pit of hillbillies.
-Hey! My mom is from this city!- Petre was a bit sensitive to topics envolving people from the countryside. -But I must agree, he have nothing in his head. That goalkeeper too, Arian was his name? He is just an old fashioned idiot that thinks we still are in the forties.
He stood up, curved himself and raised his finger, imitating the stereotypical homesick grandfather, so popular in the nation’s movies and series.
-I my time we didn’t have this thing of fun and relaxation! We had to work hard to do our best… or the soldiers would shut us!
The four of them laughed, Torfin and Miklos in the table and Petre and the tall bodyguard standing in front of the table.
-I think is time to go, dear alcoholic friends.
The three of them turned pale in one second after noticing the man behind Petre.
-I should’ve reported you to the Manager when I saw you ordering that beer, but since you didn’t lose today I will open an exception. But don’t try to do this again…- He was preparing to leave, but turned around to say: -Oh, and you are technically breaking the law, you own all of this booze. Mr Petre shouldn’t try to find holes in the balqese law, I assure you that this don’t end well.

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 1:25 pm**

A Black Day

Farfadillis 7–0 Timuria
Farfadillis #10 (10, 33, 60), Farfadillis #11 (56, 71, 88), Farfadillis (69)

by Tufan Nursultan

The Red Wolves appear to have (hopefully) reached rock bottom, with a horrific 7-0 catastrophe where none of the players or the manager covered themselves in glory with an abysmal performance where the wheels well and truly fell off and any feel good factor towards these players appeared to evaporate rapidly.

The early stages of the match heralded disaster, with the host's striker getting an early goal in the 10th minute and then again in the 33rd minute. The Red Wolves didn't muster any serious opposition, but did manage one shot on target from Ertan Renda, which was easily held by the hosts goalkeeper. The Red Wolves only went into the half 2-0 down, a respectable score, but the worst was yet to come.

Five goals would find their way past Murat Yigithan, three of which were his fault. The result has left the Red Wolves well adrift with little direction or hope at this point.

What They Said After the Match:

Bekir Altingunes refused to speak to us following the match, in violation of his contract with the Football Federation we have lodged a formal complaint.

Player Ratings:

All of them, including the substitutes: Ismail Burhan, Tayyar Ozel and Metin Aytacoglu get a 1/10 for nothing short of a disgrace.

Man of the Match: Every Farfadillis player.

Schedule and Results:
MD1: @ Pasarga W 2-0
MD2: vs Yttribia D 1-1, Halkın Güneş Çiftliği Stadium
MD3: @ Polkopia L 1-0
MD4 vs Drawkland L 3-0, Genel Sendika Stadium
MD5: @ Farfallidis L 7-0
MD6: Bye
MD7: vs Fujai, Madenci Stadium
MD8: @ Gyatso-Kai
MD9: vs Libonesia, Dev Halk Stadium
MD 10: @ North East Asia
MD11: vs Melbergia, Halkın Güneş Çiftliği
MD12: vs Pasarga, Dev Halk Stadium
MD13: @ Yttribia
MD14: vs Polkopia, Genel Sendika Stadium
MD15: @Drawkland
MD16: vs Farfaillidis, Dev Halk Stadium
MD17: Bye
MD18: @ Fujai
MD19: vs Gyatso-Kai, Madenci Stadium
MD20: @ Libonesia
MD21: vs North East Asia, Madenci Stadium
MD22: @ Melbergia

Posted: **Thu Dec 19, 2019 1:35 pm**

Squornshelan Confederate Football Association
Official Press Release

It is my responsibility to announce that, effective immediately, the SCFA has relieved Bethany Donnell of her duties as general manager of the SRS National Football Team. The SCFA board and I would like to take this time to thank Ms. Donnell for her service. Under her leadership, our national team was able to make the transition from a promising but raw side fresh from their first qualifying effort to a consistent and respected side ranked among the top-50 in the multiverse.

Donnell's tenure began just prior to the sixth Independent Associations Championship, where she made her debut leading the Black-and-Reds to a second round appearance. She and her team then narrowly missed qualifying for World Cup 82, finishing just three points behind Pasarga. That result was followed up with two more second round appearances at Cup of Harmony 74 and IAC 7. World Cup 83 qualifying also saw the Black-and-Reds narrowly miss advancement from their qualifying group, this time on a tiebreaker. While this was a definite disappointment, Donnell was able to rally the team to a quarterfinal appearance at Cup of Harmony 75. Most recently, the undoubted highlight of her time in the Confederacy was IAC 8. Using her roster's depth admirably, she brought her team through three extra time matches, eventually taking third place.

It is this consistent and improving performance that has made the past few weeks such a surprise to the SCFA board, and to myself. We are dismayed with the team's failure to win a single match. It is our belief that new leadership is needed. We thank Ms. Donnell for everything she has done for football in the Confederacy in her five years here, and sincerely wish her well in her future endeavors.

A search committee tasked with interviewing and hiring candidates for the manager position has been formed, but we have no further announcement concerning the future of the national team's management at this time.

Ailen Koirala
President, SCFA

SRS Callups for MD7 & MD8

GK: Stovar Krieven, Kinner Mustahil
LB: Djabgor Dzarkhin, Walda Harkhan
RB: Jinkzta Ulcviecel, Janar Delu
CB: Tervi Oleb, Rudi Dalso, Skumantas Nakhutin, Zemen Ystrad
LM: Aatu Ruoho, Jzeovak Vladcik
RM: Vrenz Tambura, Meaza Teklu
CM: Iuri Takala, Danin Stolp, Jirar Lomidan
ST: Zoban Ajao, Demkjo Jzvanic, Viordar Rebljeten, Lyzolda Petrov

SRS Qualifying Schedule:

MD1:  SRS 0-0 Flavovespia @ Synesoft Arena (cap. 38,600), Syneca, Sivolvia, SRS
MD2:  Mustardy 3-3 SRS @ Johann Speck Nationalstadion (cap. 8,923), Héronne, Mustardy 
MD3:  SRS 3-3 Vakolicci Haven and Celeria @ Pheldagriff Stadium (cap. 45,620), Yassaca, Sivolvia, SRS
MD4:  South Covello 2-1 SRS @ Revolution Stadium, (cap. 42,000), Riverview, SCO
MD5:  SRS 0-1 Qasden @ Flanoil Arena (cap. 50,350), Traal, East Flania, SRS
MD6:  Filindostan 2-1 SRS @ Filindostan National Stadium (cap. 70,000), San Marco, Kabishawan, FID
MD7:  SRS v Furby Island @  Ralph Wilson Memorial Stadium (cap. 48,700), Han Dold City, Han Dold, SRS
MD8:  Bliuji v SRS @ TBA
MD9:  BYE
MD10: SRS v Ziwana @ Emerald Coast Colosseum (cap. 31,200), Vassilian, Algolia, SRS
MD11: Mitra and Soma v SRS @ TBA
MD12: Flavovespia v SRS @ TBA
MD13: SRS v Mustardy @ Overburg Arena (cap. 46,222), Damogran, Algolia, SRS
MD14: Vakolicci Haven and Celeria v SRS @ TBA
MD15: SRS v South Covello @ Raftel Park (cap. 59,870), Chalesm, Megabrantis, SRS
MD16: Qasden v SRS @ Stade de Solis (cap.70,500), Fyre QAS
MD17: SRS v Filindostan @ Slavnarzeczpospolitastadion (cap. 61,230), Lublova, Molvania, SRS
MD18: Furby Island v SRS @ TBA
MD19: SRS v  Bliuji @ Chernov Stadium (cap. 57,600), Viltvodle, Megabrantis, SRS
MD20: BYE
MD21: Ziwana v SRS Izula National Stadium (cap. 55,750)
MD22: SRS v Mitra and Soma @ Henkmar Field (cap. 29,850), Brasta, Sivolvia, SRS

SRS Qualifying Goalscoring Leaders:

2 - Bedesnjak
1 - Erseburg
1 - Hocij
1 - Petrov
1 - Ruoho
1 - Stolp

NationStates

World Cup 84- RP Thread (IC)

WC84 MD4

Holes in the law

WC84 MD6