Posted: Thu Jun 13, 2019 3:41 pm
NSSCRA: ONE RACE WIN FOR COCOABOS, ONE BIG LEAP FOR SCIENCE?
Exhibition race result could mean good things for Tropicorp
by Maria Muller
TUNDRA FALLS - For the very first time in the history of the Nationstates Stock Car Racing Association, a human will not be awarded the race victory.
No, this is not because of a dead tie or some other thing in the rulebook that causes the results of a race to be nullified. It's because the winner of this season's Exhibition at Tundra Falls is not a human, but a bird. Cocoabo #78, one of the Tropicorp company's genetic experiments, took the checkered flag here at the Tundra Falls Proving Grounds superspeedway. River Suzgar of Vilita & Turori Motorsports took second place; the driver of the #14 Dart is thus considered the fastest human in the race. Suzgar beat third placer Thea Alvarez, driver of the #46 Chadwick for St. Kanye's Glorious Free Republic Motorsports, by a nose to the line; fourth was Alex Knight (#6) of Hampton Island Racing, followed by Jebslunder Eva Kerman (#13), Alvarez's teammate Jeremiah Brooke (#18), Team Cassadaigua's Jenna Logan (#11), another Cocoabo (#28), Suzgar's teammate Yraaga Gilli'i (#41), and rounding out the top ten is Knight's teammate Kevin Cosgrove (#22).
Other notable results include Skip Stiller, GFR's third driver, finishing eleventh in the #3 Chadwick; Gordon Orton of Xanneria's KRD Team Iona driving the #16 Knox to thirteenth place, highest of all new drivers; Hampton Islander Lexi Patterson (#30) ending up sixteenth in her first appearance as a full-timer for Jebslund; Sherpa Kai Qiang settling for seventeenth in the #44 TMW, after starting on pole; Ben Carpenter (#84), of Esmerel's Phoenician Racing, at twenty-first, highest of all new teams, and in an unchartered and unsponsored car at that; A7DXZ5, a self-driving car from the nation of Wagensvolk, at twenty-ninth; Anavella Ariiki (#88), the Cocoabos' human teammate, at thirty-sixth; and reigning titleholder Stacie Houston (#27) at forty-fourth (third from last) after having a tire burst halfway through the race.
The three Yeezies followed up their good qualifying positions for the Exhibition with equally good runs, with each one leading at least six laps. They each did their own thing during the race; Stiller raced the frontrunners hard, including Suzgar and Qiang. "Yes, it's an exhibition, and yes, I have to flex my muscles early so that the newcomers know and the oldtimers remember what they'll be dealing with when they attempt to get past me", said the veteran. "Some of the newcomers are big deals back in their respective countries. Hapilopper and Esmerel brought pros. They obviously know their stuff back home, but I want to see how they will hold up against some of the best in the world. I didn't let anyone intimidate me back when I started, and look where I am."
Brooke rode drafts and relied on patient passing to earn a top ten in his first NSSCRA race back after the accident at Xanneria. While he said that he could have been happier with a win, he admitted that he thought it felt good to be back. "Not only did I miss the cars and tracks, I also missed my friends. I gave Stacie [Houston] a hug. Qiang came to me and asked if I still wanted to go to his hometown, and I said sure. Dude looked surprised to see me. Well, I told him, I decided to work out to appear more mature. And how do I know that's what he was thinking? My mother also gave me that look when I came to visit last month." Brooke's next aim is to get a win and snap his streak from last season. He retreated to his hauler after the interview with the press to watch race footage and talk to his crew about setups. "The guy could give those Jebslunders a run for their money when it comes to being diligent", commented Stiller.
Alvarez, meanwhile, had some of the faster pit stops of the day. "I'm really happy with how my crew did on those stops", she said. "We really worked together and got rewarded for it." Like Brooke, she went to chat with other drivers before the race, in this case Lexi Patterson. "I told her how happy I am for the opportunity that has been given to her. I understand her situation since we come from the same background, racing karts, and we're both an inspiration to young women everywhere." Alvarez also gave an opinion on Cocoabo #78's win. "I think it's an incredible win. Not only for the bird, but also the people who made it possible for birds to drive, and even win. I'm sure the scientific community will take notice. Also, I think it's cute. The bird, I mean. I'd hug it, but I'm afraid I might spook it."
According to GFR's Sage Caldwell, who was on standby for the team, some scientists from Tropicorp were seen yelling and cheering after Cocoabo #78 crossed the start/finish line. "Yeah, that'd make me happy too if I was one of them. To see my creation do great things, and also because of the added investor and grant money that's sure to come our way", said Sage. He then added, "Hey, if a bird can win, so can I."
The series will return to the Proving Grounds next week for the first points race of the eighth NSSCRA season, the Tundra Falls 500. No requests for the open charter have been made; hometown driver Ashley Matthews might show up, while GFR has not expressed interest. All qualifying sessions and races will be broadcast live on SKYNET (Saint KanYe NETwork) Sports Channel 12, and online at nsscra.skynet.stk.
OFFICIAL STANDINGS - Race 0 of 30 (Exhibition)
1. #78 Cocoabo #78 (TRP)
2. #14 River Suzgar (VNT)
3. #46 Thea Alvarez (STK)
4. #6 Alex Knight (HAM)
5. #13 Eva Kerman (JEB)
6. #18 Jeremiah Brooke (STK)
11. #3 Skip Stiller (STK)
DRIVER POINTS
N/A
NEXT RACE
Tundra Falls 500, Tundra Falls, Newmanistan