Games of the XIII Olympiad RP Thread

[West Phoenicia]

The Daily Blog

--Lord Randall Van der Dressel, Writer and Political columnist.

West Phoenicians are a fickle bunch. They will love and praise you one moment and swing the pendulum in the opposite direction a mere blink later. It's as if we all have Aquarius blood pumping through our veins.

One of the most famous examples of our ficklness was the case of Queen Elizabeth Bush III; queen consort of West Phoenicia alongside her husband King Gaius Bush. Along with her advisors they assassinated the king and supplanted Elizabeth as ruler with the notion she would one day step aside for her son Prince Gaius Bush II to rule. She began her rule in 1837 and in the beginning she was loved by the citizens. However it did not take long for that love to fizzle. With excess spending on clothes, galas and a new place in her honour it did not take more than three years for the citizens demanding her to be dethroned and her son to step up.
Instead of stepping aside Queen Elizabeth Bush III declared war on the provinces that supported her son. Her son who the citizens now loved began to march to the capital with his larger army to depose the queen. However before their arrival her own advisors murdered her and presented her head to her son as a peace offering. Needless to say their heads also came off.

Or the fickle case of Prime Minister Anton Le'Moode, who in 2010 was voted in as a centrist Prime Minister who hoped to work with both sides. The notion of a centrist Prime Minister delighted the population who were looking for a more balanced politician and not one favoured by the right or left. He died 6 months later in a car bombing when neither the right nor the left favoured his lukewarm fence sitting policies. Both groups pointed the finger at the other party for the crime, yet no one has been arrested for the crime.

Even in sports West Phoenicians will love you one minute and hate you the next. So is the case of Lady Anthea Bordremanne, an athlete competiting in the women's 48kg Weightlifting event.
26 year old Anthea Bordremanne began her Olympic career at the previous Olympic Games at
Novonaya, Kelssek and Provinsk, Vekaiyu. Two women had qualified for the event. Trish Soong was the clear favourite of the two. And she pulled off a terrific victory by winning bronze in the event.
Lady Bordremanne was not as trained as Trish, she was average. Her father a rich merchant in silks had donated $250,000 to the West Phoenician Weightlifting Federation . Suddenly she had made the team.
Many in lower class circles criticised the decision saying money had won out against talent. The rich did not mind as they had placed their hope in Trish Soong. While Trish had taken the bronze, no one seemed to have cared that Lady Bordremanne had failed. Her butt had touched the mat during her lifts, twice. No one cares and the federation was $250,000 better off.

Fast forward to the Republica Olympic Games. Trish Soong had announced at the end of last year she would not be returning to the Olympics. Lady Anthea Bordremanne was again choosen for the team after another $250,000 deposit by her father.

Unfortunately her talent had not grown since the last games. In fact she had only won one title in all that time. She was joined by Em Nells, a college student from the University of Blackfoot Territory who was there due to a weightlifting scholarship. Em had been touted as a new rising star, but she was not there yet. Hope laid in Anthea Bordremanne.

A small following of fans attended the women's 48kg Weightlifting event, but their support turned from sweet to sour half way through the event when Anthea once again lowered herself to low that her bum touched the mat.
A chorus of boos rang out and someone called "Bring back Soong " when it became clear Lady Bordremanne was not even going to progress that she was keeping the bottom of the ladder warm yet again, Just as she did the previous games.
"Bring back Soong, and pay for play is not okay" the fans catcalled before being told to quiet down.

Lady Bordremanne left the arena in tears once she touched the mat again disqualifying herself refusing to speak with the media who hounded her out the door.
Em Nells who many believed would be the poorer performer shocked all West Phoenicians present when she finished in 19th spot.

The Weightlifting Federation choose not to respond to calls as to why Anthea paid to play and she was an underperformer who lost West Phoenicia the opportunity to pull a medal in this event. And pow just like that she has gone from fan hopeful to one of the most hated athletes in West Phoenicia.

[Greater vakolicci haven]

Why is turning on home nation athletes now considered 'okay?'
Maria Schtenko

I am not usually one to cry for fairness or to attack unsportsmanlike conduct...but today, I feel it is only right that I issue this statement to express my absolute disgust with the West Phoenician spectators for their treatment of that nations first-choice 48 kg weightlifter, Anthea Bordremanne. I do not care if the criticisms that her family has payed to participate are true or not: from participating in this event with her in two Olympic cycles, I have known her to be a passionate competitor and one who cares deeply for her success and that of the nation she competes under the flag of. I hope that in the time I am older and greyer, the Havenic fans continue to do what they have always done to our athletes who finish far outside of the Haven's expectations, as I myself did in the 3 events I participated in yesterday: treat those who represent your nation with respect, unless you feel you could do it better.
I will not stand by or stay silent when so-called supporters boo their nations athletes out of the door, when they are in tears due to not being able to carry out an arduous task of sporting brilliance. That she was able to pull off any lifts of this standard is a testament to the fact that Lady Bordremanne is more than qualified to call herself an Olympian, even if she does not win a medal. Those who attack athletes they claim to be supporting, especially those blessed with the privileged pulpit of a press microphone, do not deserve the right to call themselves national supporters, however.
I plan to watch the artistic swimming, because I enjoy the sport. Our competetors, if the press are to be believed, are not likely to be victorious in these events, however I will not boo, jeer or insult them. I urge every supporter, especially every Havenic supporter, to take a similar view and reject this shameful behaviour; recognise instead that your nations athletes have trained very hard to be where they are and do not need defeat amplified by your voices from the stand.

[Vangaziland]

Linda Henshmen and several other women had already bonded over the short stay at the village. Many of the combat sports ladies shared a wing of the dorm building. Their rooms were located under the auto racing and cheerleading delegations above them. One of their favorite rituals was their evening workout. They all trained with their teams in the morning and afternoon. They went to watch games after dinner. Before bedtime, they would wind down their day with a quick session at the gym.

Linda and a few friends wanted to watch something different than the usual fight. Judo and Mixed Martial Arts gave them chances to watch events similar to their own. They went to watch women's 48 kg weightlifting instead. Abigail Kaldwell and Franchesa Grimoli joined Linda to watch an event where no Vangazi were competing. They wanted to be neutral observers. They all had an interest in weightlifting, since it was part of their training.

They were surprised when Phoenician fans started jeering their own athlete. "Come on, you can do it", shouted Grimoli. The Vannish wrestler scored a bronze in XII Olympiad's 58 kg Greco-Roman Wrestling event. This year, Grimoli will be wrestling Freestyle in the same weight class.

"Good effort", Henshmen called out over the angry Phoenicians. Linda made a name for herself in MMA tied to an event sanctioned by Free Republic finances. Her first boxing title came in a place called Ilyseum which may have had distant ties to this Olympaid's host nation. She was likely known by local fight fans. She hoped to add Olympic success to her resume.

Abigail Kaldwell simply clapped and cheered. She couldn't think of anything motivating to say. The citizen of Wrexwic is the only person to have defeated Linda Henshmen in an international title fight. She out boxed Linda in a close MBO fight, winning by a 7-4 decision. Abby was one of the few people on the Vannish delegation that would get loud with Linda. Most others let Linda have her way. Henshmen could be aggressive.

Kaldwell sometimes opposed Linda just to try being the top dog. Linda usually deflected Kaldwell's aggression and tried to work with her. The trio were all excited to watch the weightlifting. As Lady Bordremanne walked off crushed, Linda turned to the others and said, "Aw, poor lady. We should ask her to hang out."

"Let's lift with her", Kaldwell added excitedly.

"Oh my gods", said Grimoli. "Let's try to catch her." The three agreed and watched another two lifters before leaving slightly early. They chose to stalk three places where either one would have a good chance of running into her.

Linda posted up outside of a door they had seen atheletes walking into earlier. Others watched building exits, knowing she would have to leave for her bus back to her quarters. It was Linda who would run into her after waiting for quite awhile. The fighter was wearing a badge which identified her as an Olympic athlete. "Oh hey", Linda called out to the blonde weightlifter. "Nice effort out there", she said warmly.

The weightlifter was likely not in a mood to talk. Linda had to try grabbing her attention and then get to the point."Say.. I'm a fighter. Me and a few friends were wondering if you would lift with us a few times a week."

Henshmen didn't bring up what country she was from, though her badge identified this. The two empires were embroiled in a battle which had already been waged from archery to lacrosse and even cheerleading. Linda didn't like the cheerleaders anyway and thought the archery thing was overblown.

Victory in the Multiverse Fighting Championships landed Linda a 20 million NSD sponsorship with REDUP energy. A medal here might lead to a shoe deal she's been trying to close. Linda is holding out for more money. Olympic success might show she's worth the higher pay. Her self made fortune may have been different than the Phoenician's. She still wouldn't likely be the type to look down on her for her wealth.

Henshmen told Lady Bordremanne which gym they worked out at and the next few times they'd be there. She smiled, waved and dissappeared as the weightlifter was left to her day. If Bordremanne's delegation turned on her, she could find a place with the Vangazi. They wouldn't worry about her upbringing or favoritism. They generally expected such things to hapen in West Phoenicia.

Linda and Abby wanted a new member in their clique. The fighters also hung out with Hilda Bjorn of the Judo team. She was Otto Bjorn's sister. He was also an MFC belt holder. Linda's sister Jen didn't want to hang out with Linda and her friends. She wanted to make her own name.

Boxer Helga Ivarsdottir also hung around the group, but she was the youngest and least talented fighter of the pack. She was just glad to be around such famous Vannish fighters. Scouts did not project lots of success for Ivarsdottir. She could look up to people like Bordremanne who fought as hard as they could even when outclassed.

There was also a part of Kaldwell and Linda who wanted to compete with the Phoencian squad by befriending their fallen member. The entire clique would show up for their next lifting session, curious on if the international will show up.

[Elejamie]

---

I Attempt to Talk About the Rugby League Nines
Elan Raetolil (aka RubiFaman) - Republica, Free Republics

This is going to be a challenge for me. But I'll still accept it. After all, I'm the go-to girl when it comes to league here on DG and I always love a good challenge. I climbed Socrates Peak last year to raise money for charity, I became the 10th person to beat that Dante's Inferno spaghetti challenge (for those outside of the iyil of Rosate, it's that challenge at Dante's Italian Bistro in Rosetta where you have to eat an entire bowl of spaghetti in bolognese sauce with that incredibly spicy sauce within 30 minutes) and, when I was 19, I once cycled around the island of Rosetta to raise money for charity. So I should handle this.

Nico Eberhardt, seen here in
practice for the Aldenport
Vikings, will be part of our first
and maybe last league nines
team.

So, rugby league nines. It's where you have nine on the pitch instead of thirteen, as well as the standard four interchanges. Much like sevens, conversions and I think penalties as well are done by drop goals instead of tees. In nines, there's no limit when it comes to substitutes whereas in full league you can't substitute more than ten times per game. And there's a shorter amount of time spent in the sin bin; 2-5 mins instead of 10. There's more but I'm not really sure what the rules will be regarding things like length of each match and if they'll have a break in between each half, how many referees we'll be seeing on the pitch or anything. Don't expect the HBRL or the WRL to get a league nines tournament much like the ERC 7s for the Elejamian Rugby Championship, let alone a Nines World Cup.

As this seems to be the first tournament for it as far as I know, coupled with the fact that most of these teams probably haven't played in the Rugby League World Cup before and probably won't when it starts back up, I won't be going into too much detail with each team. That being said, if they took part in the last RLWC (which was quite a while ago and may not be as accurate a representation) regardless of whether or not it was their men's team, women's team or a mixed-sex team, I'll be going into a bit more detail. Much like Dave with his sevens round-up, I'll be talking about each group in a single paragraph.

For the men, we have the Kytler Peninsulae, Mattijana, Ethane and Mitra and Soma as our opponents. And the first team I'll be talking about will be the Kytler Peninsulae. They weren't in the last Rugby League World Cup and I honestly can't remember if they have been in any ones before that but, either way, they might prove to be a bit of a challenge. Next up is Mattijana who, fortunately, were in the last tourney. There, they finished third in their group with wins against Vassiya, the Natanians and Nosts and Tobiasia but, unfortunately, defeats to Ko-oren and Racao meant they were unable to progress to the next round; they're pretty much our biggest rivals here and I wouldn't be surprised if they took the top spot instead of us (not to mention there was the small matter of them beating us earlier, 24-12). Afterwards it's Ethane and, although they weren't at the last RLWC, they were at the one before it, where they finished top of their group with a 2-0-1 record (their sole loss being a 2-0 opening loss to Litorea) before they were shut out 17-0 by the Royal Kingdom of Quebec. So, naturally, with less than 3/4 of the manforce and a few years since the last rugby league competition, they might be facing a little bit of an uphill battle here. And, finally we have Mitra and Soma, a couple of newcomers that might pull off a surprise or two.

An old picture of Cheryl Nathan from last season when
she played for the Crown Manor Princesses, shortly
before she was transferred over to the Portham
Islanders.

For the women, it'll be us alongside the Main Nation Ministry, Eastfield Lodge, Kriegiersien and the hosts. Slight problem, though, is that Free Republics is the only team out of those three who were in the last Rugby League World Cup, where they finished fourth in their group, only beating POGGERS (all caps intentional) and Aquitayne. And, indeed, none of them were in the tournament before that. Or even the World Trophy before it, the one-off unofficial tournament due to some issues with the hosts that I'm not willing to go into. However, that doesn't necessarily mean it'll be easy, especially since the Free Republics are the only other team that has international legue experience and Kriegiersien's Olympic athletes appear to be robotic in some manner which could give them some edge when it comes to hitting. But we shall see how it goes.

Again, copying Dave's style as I have to give some predictions. While I don't know if our ladies will have what it takes to make it through, I think they will still get through to the next round where they'll be joined by either the hosts or Eastfield Lodge. The men's tournament will be a little bit harder to determine since we've got two good teams alongside us to the point where, if we don't make it through, I think it'll be them instead. But, if I had to pick which one out of the two would be joining us to the next round if we make it through, I'd have to say that Mattijana will be that lucky team.

There's not really anything else here that catches my eye much. Gridiron's another demonstration sport that might be worth checking out, though I don't imagine that there'll be a whole load of you that are into that sort of thing. Javier Pasante managed to grab a win against Kriegiersien's Jack Anteater, losing the first set 6-4 but coming back in the next two with 6-3 and 6-2 wins; personally, I'm looking forward to seeing how Laura Meyer will do. Our women's sevens team has made it two out of two so far thanks to a 33-12 win over Valanora, though I'll let Dave take care of that when he gets around to it. And we did a lot better in the team archery event than I thought we would do, making it all the way to the quarter-final where we were beaten by the hosts, who'd then go on to claim bronze. All in all, quite a pleasant day and it just shows you what's in store here in the Olympics. Now, let's hope that tomorrow will bring us something great.

---

More from RubiFaman:

• Elan's Blog: Dave Stole My Blog Post Title Idea
• Elan's Guide to the 2019 HBRL Season
• Elan's Guide to the Million Sofanc Game
• Elan's Guide to the 2018 HBRL Play-offs

[Kelssek]

KELSSEK'S HOME FOR THE OLYMPICS
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> News
> Full results
> Athlete and team profiles

SOCCER
Kelssek off the mark against Vilita & Turori
Robyn Kagawa scored twice and Hannah Price was on the board as Kelssek's Olympic football campaign began with a 3-1 win over Vilita and Turori. But the men's team found the going a lot tougher and head coach Gregor Tomlinson says he "expects more from the leading players" following their 1-0 loss to Vekaiyu. Tomlinson suggested that Gabriel Lapierre, given the captain's armband and attracting international attention after his play for the senior national team, needs to "take responsibility and lift up his teammates." [more]

OTHER STORIES

• Rugby sevens (W): Kelssek notches second win in a row against Kriegiersien
• What is the optimal number of players for a rugby game? Controversy simmers
• Moose mascot put in headlock as Kelssek House festivities reach fever pitch

---

Three to watch for Kelssek as swimming finals begin
Attention turns to the first evening of finals in the Olympic swim meet with two Kelssek swimmers and the women's 4x100m relay team set to race for medals. Victoria Lemire and Xavier Bakartura will look to plant a flag for the new generation of aquatic talent. Coverage of the session begins at 10:30am KCST. [more]

• Robitaille fastest qualifier for heats in women's 100 m butterfly
• Gosselin and Desjardins into the semis in 100m breaststroke

[Amuaplye]

January 12, 2019

Media Under Attack: Bomber sends pipe bombs to ATV Sports Commentator and The Observer

The Olympiad Bomber has sent 2 more packages.

The first package, which was discovered at approximately 9:35 in the morning yesterday, was sent to Pirinoa native, ATV Olympic Analyst and Sports Commentator Matthew Farmer, and successfully arrived to its target. The package was opened by Farmer, but failed to detonate due to a faulty blasting cap. The AIA immediately seized the package, which deviated heavily from the MO.

First, it was written, in a formal, cursive hand, instead of being printed out. The second difference was the stamps used, this time, it was a Christmas stamp depicting the Three Wise Men, worth 3 Centos. The APS have refused to say anything on the matter.

The bomber misspelled the name as Mathew Farmer, and sent it as Yorick Kingston.

The second package, discovered 4 hours later, was sent to Antonio Taylor, CEO and lead writer of this paper. A postal worker noticed the block letters and Father Christmas stamps, and immediately sent it to police, who safely detonated it, shortly before it left Perth. The bomb was sent to our offices at 2 Holt Street, and misspelled the name as Antonio Taylr. The return address was from one Sylvia Martin.

---

Team physician claims that Byron Weaver won't be able to compete.

According to a physician at the Amuaplye National Olympic Committee, Olympic Gold medalist Byron Weaver will not be able to compete ever again due to permanent damage to his legs.

"The damage to his leg was extremely bad..." The physician said at a press conference on the Olympiad Bomber. "I'm entirely surprised that they didn't just cut the leg off."

Weaver said about it, "I can't compete, but I can be the loudest voice in the crowd. I'm going to the Closing Ceremony. I might be there in a wheelchair, and I can't play anymore, but I can help others win."

Both Delila Quinn and May Silva have not commented on the matter.

[Teremaran Olympics Delegation]

Hotel Conference Room
Ekaterine, Falkasia

Al-Fasi raised a hand at his colleague, who took the signal to settle down. “Unfortunately, it is matter of money,” Al-Fasi said, “The more we sell, the better facilities we can get for you, and the more likely you are to win an event.”

Whispering in Al-Fasi’s ear, the other Gragastavian quipped, “Not that he would know anything about winning.”

Roxanne Hereux, the BDI corporate official, nodded towards the Gragastavian gentlemen once again. (If they could be called that.)
“This is correct. Promotion of Teremaran Olympic merchandise will generate money for the Teremaran Unified Olympic Committee, thereby generating funds to build training facilities and to hire staff, coaches and other management to train our athletes. We all benefit, so why not help give it an extra push?”

It had been almost 3 years now since Teremaran officials had come together to decide that they needed to pool their resources in order to field a unified delegation and compete on the greater international stage with some tough competition. The Teremaran delegation brought together several nations from different ideologies and economies, but those who embraced capitalism had seen the potential beyond merely enabling regional athletes a chance to compete at the highest level and gain an equal footing. They saw the color of gold.

“Because we’re missing out on that training right now, in the crucial weeks leading up to the big show, in order to be your corporate whores. I think that we’ve made that clear. Where's the benefit in tanking our chances in the Free Republics by fucking around for weeks missing our training? Can't we do this after we get back from the Olympics?”
Gianni Tuto was not backing down.

Another man in a suit...not an athletic track suit, but charcoal coat, vest and tie...stood up from the back of the room and moved forward. He had grey hair that was perfectly coiffed and trimmed, and the slight, even tan that looked like the kind people paid for at spas. He spoke as he sauntered up the last couple meters,
“What you don’t realize is that this isn’t a debate, Gianni. We’re not asking your opinions or your objections to the game plan here, people.” He did a roving glance around the room.

“Who the f-”

“Shut up! The check writer is talking now. This is a done deal. Roxanne has been doing a nice job of breaking it down for you and describing how we’ll be going in to each city. She also wasn’t kidding when she said your management signed off on this. You’re ours now. Everyone’s getting their cut and, in a way, so will you. Some of your national Olympic committees have rules against that, but we found the work arounds. Anyway, you can whine and moan, but that just makes everything take longer. I don’t have all day here, so we’ll just get some interns to come in and hear you whine and bring you whatever passes for snacks here in Ekaterine. Fish heads? I dunno...” He locked eyes back on Tuto.
“Then, punch bag, the schedule will be delayed and you’ll spend one more day not training for the ‘Big Show’.” He actually made air quotes.
“Then...we have to make alternate arrangements in all the cities because you didn’t show up on the day you were supposed to. Guess what? That all costs extra money. Lots of money. Money that we’ll take from how we were going to compensate you, or your training funds, depending on how some of you had that set up. But No, go ahead and waste time about something you can not change. We’ll wait.”

The Gaulic field hockey player stood back up.
“Excusemoi. Didn’t you just say that you don’t want us to wait?”

The slick suit pointed over at her while staring at Gianni, who seemed to be turning purple.
“See! This girl gets it, Gianni!”
He was being sarcastic, but still getting his point across. Or scoring points, depending on who you talked to.

The man paced a little more at the front of the room.
“You know, I get it. My colleagues…” He motioned back to the other BDI staff, the Gragastavians, and other sponsor representatives.
“You see us as just looking at the bottom dollar. That you’re a bunch of unwilling athletes being dragged around for other peoples’ profit. Partly, that’s true, but also, as was said, we are promoting your sports and Olympics here in the region. This is a mutually beneficial tour. There’s no way you all can’t benefit from the exposure, so your fellow athletes look to you to do your job, and part of that is playing nice and getting out there and pressing the flesh. Welcome to the big people level!”
The man paused to look out a window.
”I’m done now. Roxanne will take back over and in as little as two hours, some of you will be heading out to events out there in the beautiful Falkasian capital. Enjoy it and soak it all in. If some of you insist on whining and refusing, well...then, we’ll book you an early flight home and you can explain to all your national committees and management how you blew it and justify why you still deserve a spot out to the Free Republics in a few months. Take care, campers!”
He strode out of the room, ignoring comments and questions thrown at him.

RP was provided by Neu Engollon, Gragastavia, Terre des Gaules

[Main Nation Ministry]

The Morning of Day 3

Inside one of the hotel suite to where Ryuu Taichi was staying in, he had converted it into his own personal dojo. Waking up to his alarm clock, he pressed his hand down, where the clock shattered into pieces. "Not again." Ryuu complained, as he got out of bed. Walking over to the mini-fridge, he looked at the egg carton to which he grabbed to satisfy his need for protein. Putting all of the yolk in a mug, he drank it as if it was his own coffee, where he didn't seem to be bothered. Hearing a loud smack at the door, he immediately knew who it was. Answering the door, the Sparktaker arrived wearing his trademark helmet and some spandex. "Ryuu! Are you ready to brace the pain I'm planning for this session?" he said in a deep menacing voice. "I'm ready! Come in! The match of our lifetime shall arrive unpredictably. We must train till our muscles can crush a melon with ease!" Ryuu said, riled up.

One hour of rumbling from the hotel room, Ryuu and the Sparktaker were quick to hear the door knocking from outside their room. "Get the ambient music! They must not know!" Ryuu yelled, as they proceeded to organize everything as it once were. Ryuu answered the door, where it was Jason Masami rubbing his head. "Do you mind? I'm trying to nap and the whole Richter scale is above me." Jason said, visibly tired. "Don't mind us, we were just cross fitting and doing yoga. Do you like to join?" Ryuu said, calmly. "No, I heard you like to play dodge ball back in the educational facility that you were principal in. I don't want any of my bones broken when I'm driving." Jason said, letting Ryuu close the door. "The coast is clear. But we must practice silence. We shall continue." Ryuu said, as he let Sparktaker punch him in the face. It felt good to him.

The First Gig

Brenda noticed that Jessica wasn't in her hotel suite, until she got a call from a bodyguard saying that she was at the athlete's village where West Phoenicia was. Brenda didn't understand, until Jessica came back to the hotel. "Brenda, I got a call from Cindy! She's at the airport, make sure she has her keyboard!" Jessica said. Cindy came with her keyboard in a wide duffle bag, where she put it in the studio. Jessica came and greeted her with a strong hug. Cindy made sure her blue ankh shirt was still neat, since the flights were backed up a bit due to the amount of people attending the Olympics. Around brunch, Jessica made an announcement. "Guys! Listen! I managed to land ourselves a first gig!" Jessica said, where Gerald turned his head. "How?"

"So those cheerleaders or whatever with that awkward performance? I took a cab back to see where they had gone and I saw this huge venue or whatever that the West Phoenicia have for fun! So I went inside, spoke to some people, got a little deal and a promise I offered them, and they told me I can bring the band! Our first gig is tonight!" Jessica explained. "Aw sweet, I was worried the locals weren't interested." Tony said, where he went to get his guitar. "I help out with giving out the flyers! Cindy, I go easy and you! Practice with some of the songs I got written down. Gerald, Frank and I are going to put up the flyers! Brenda, get the stickers ready! We're going to leave an impression in Free Republics tonight!" Jessica smiled, thinking things wouldn't be so bad.

JESSICA VISITS THE GARDEN OF EDEN!

"Live in the West Phoenicia athelte's village, Jessica Madden will be playing tonight at the Garden of Eden on the second floor after the Day 3 results around 9 PM to 11 PM! Available for partying and signing autographs, Jessica and her band will play 3 exclusive songs, including a special encore song, soon to be available on her next album! Stickers and signed pictures of the band will be available, but is ONE NIGHT ONLY!"

Performances include:
Jessica Madden: Vocalist
Tony Sullivan: Guitarist
Gerald Winters: Bassist
Frank Gemini: Drummer
Cindy Moonbeam: Keyboard Player

"Price of admission will be 1 chip/thaler/etc! Stickers will be free!"
Disclaimer: Please note that the following songs are aimed towards a teen-demographic with the song genre being pop-punk. It is advised not to bring young children. Please note that Jessica Madden and her legal crew isn't responsible for any mishaps or incidents that happens during the concert. Bodyguards from Main Nation Ministry will be there, so please don't agitate or annoy them. They will deal an injury. Seriously.

[The Sarian]

Thomas Drabwell on course

It started off as a poor day in the pool for Sari athletes, but a fantastic performance from Thomas Drabwell in the 400 meters kept the chances of a swimming medal alive.

The day started unsuccessfully, with Owen Drabwell, the eldest of the Drabwell brothers kicking off the events in the 400 metre Freestyle. On paper, one his strongest events, Drabwell the elder finished a full six seconds behind qualification time. Thomas Drabwell was similarly poor in the breastroke, concerning commentators about his chances later on in the day.

They needn't have worried however, Drabwell swam an impressive 4:07.33 in Heat Two, beating the next fastest swimmer overall by a full second.

[Cassadaigua]

Male Cheerleaders Win Their Gold, (and other news)
by Hannah Marshall, Olympic Correspondent

They will not be able to call themselves gold medalists, but they will be able to call themselves Olympic champions. Cheerleading is only a demonstration sport, but that’s quite all right for our male squad. Led by captain Troy MacFarlane, the squad blew away the competition to claim Olympic glory. It is pretty uncommon for nations to have an all-male cheerleading squad. Most nations have either an all-female, or a mixed squad that represent them, but here in Cassadaigua, all male squads are quite common. Seen often in tights shirt that expose their full bicep area, and shorts that most nations would consider too short, the squad is a welcome sight for our female-dominated sports fans. They participate in all of the same stunts that the women will do, and are not just an all-star squad of bases from mixed squads that other nations assembled. That is where MacFarlane believes they wowed the judges the most. “We are not just a dance team,” MacFarlane said, “We’re not just a squad of bases that have gotten their training from lifting women on a mixed squad, and the judges saw that pretty clearly. Bow and arrows, scorpions, back tucks and more, we were doing all of it. We might not get the full extension on splits that a woman will, for obvious reasons, but we certainly know how to make it look pretty.” Teammate Lucas Floyd said that, “We might look a little odd to others, but we know our role to appease the Cassadagan sports fan, and we are glad that the judges understood that. We didn’t win a gold, but to be able to compete as a male-exclusive squad in the Olympics, and to finish in the world, is quite an achievement for us. We are thrilled!” As of press time, the women have not competed. Katie Brouwer, the captain of the squad says, “The competition level is obviously much greater on the women’s side.” Brouwer acknowledges that they have had a good time in the Olympic village, “It awesome to be here and to be around the great athletes, especially the attractive men that we see around here. We have met other cheerleaders, such as the squad from Vangaziland, and fully respect them for their ability and for simply being a blast to be around.”

It can be hard to keep up with all of the Olympic events going on right now as medals begin to become awarded, with three sports having done so. Cassadaigua did not collect in any of them. Boxing and MMA were one of the highlights from yesterday’s card. We had a few byes in the tournament, but here’s a brief summary.

– John Casella defeated South Covello’s Punch Drunky by unanimous decision. “He had an unconventional fighting style, but I handled it pretty well. Happy to move on in the tournament,” Casella stated.

– Lenny Deane lost by unanimous decision to Pi Paladin of Kriegiersien. Deane was solid in the first round, but seemed to lose it in the second. Deane wishes he could have a rematch, “I didn’t make the right adjustments. Thought I had him in the first round, got complacent, and he kicked my ass in the second. I wish there was a do over, but obviously there is not. Good luck to him.”

– Markus Kenneway also lost to a Kriegiersien fighter as Lars Shao won the match. This followed a similar theme with Kenneway seeming best in the first round, but in the latter two rounds, the opponent was clearly better. Kenneway did not want to talk after the match, only saying, “I lost, obviously.”

– Rodney Cochrane won by unanimous decision over West Phoenicia’s Hero Alamein. The two evenly fought through the first two rounds, but Cochrane was clearly better in the third, and had Alamein on the ropes, “I thought I could knock him out there in the third. My coach told me were probably even after the first two on the judges scoresheets, and I think I exposed a weakness of his there in the third. He was getting defensive, and in this business, when you see that, you want the knock out. I’ll take the win, certainly.” Cochrane is now in the semifinals, and will go up against hometown hero, Liang Ts’ui. “I like being the bad guy,” Cochrane said with a smile.

In a mixed martial arts match, Megan DeMarco knocked out Baroness Eurydice Dundas of West Phoenicia. “Didn’t start as well as I would have liked, but in the third round, I seized my opportunity to nail the critical blow.” The Baroness was knocked out after she failed to respond to the referee’s count. “Awesome match, and I think I can win this gold medal. As a matter of fact, I feel really good about it.” DeMarco would not quite guarantee a semifinal match victory, but seemed very confident of it.

Looking at some other sports, Cassadaigua seemed a little underwhelming in Dressage (Equestrian). Amanda Morelli seemed to do her part, and Chelsea Sutton also scored decently, but Kailey Burkhard and Laura Vaccaro had off days. Morelli says the team is capable of doing better, “We can fix this. We are better then what we showed here today, and will show that when we compete in other events.” We hope she’s right. The Olympic Committee of Cassadaigua puts a lot of money into the Equestrian series of events, and therefore better results, as a unit, are expected.

For more news concerning Olympic results, check out our webpage.


Around the delegation, the team has settled in well to Republica. Although it has not been all roses for the team. High jumper Eddie Caponera was given a formal warning about his personal level of conduct after he was seen staggering out of a bar at 4am. The team curfew was midnight. Sources say Caponera was out drinking, but his teammates left him behind for some reason when he claimed to have had earned a hot date with a member of another nation’s women’s badminton team. However, people at the bar state that Caponera was not with any other female after the teammates left, and was instead seen with a group of male athletes from an unknown delegation.

We heard reports of bullying in regards to the e-sports delegations here, and that is something that has struck the Cassadagan delegation, as well. Female gymnasts Stacie Morrow and Cara Clements, in a leaked Spacebook video that was meant to be private, were seen with wrestler Rachel Courtney, taunting two members of the e-sports delegation, Joe Farley and Rodney Kimble. In the video, Farley and Kimble were in their underwear, and forced to race one another down a hotel hallway, while crawling on all fours and barking like dogs. They promised to give $200 to the winner, but in the end, after Farley won, Morrow put the money back in her pocket, laughing and saying, “Changed my mind. That’s not a sport just like the shit you’re doing isn’t a sport, now get out of my (expletive) face.” Clements and Courtney laughed, and Clements is seen sticking the bottom of her shoe directly in Kimble’s face to taunt him after losing. The video was leaked when Rachel Courtney, who was recording, inadvertently sent it to Morrow directly on her Spacebook timeline instead of as a direct message. Courtney deleted it after about 60 minutes, but it had been seen by the wrong person in the meantime, who published it on their own page. Morrow half-apologized later, saying, “Sorry that the rest of you had to see that and that some would be offended by it. It was all in fun, and they consented to it.” Clements followed along, “They said they would do it. No one was forced to do it.” The Olympic Committee of Cassadaigua declared that they will handle the matter internally, but all three will still be competing as planned in their respective events. Joe Farley said he just wants it to go away. “I wish it would not have been leaked either, that was more damaging then what the girls did. Now, everyone sees it.”

[The Sherpa Empire]

----‭֎-‬---

Kai Qiang didn't think e-sports belonged in the Olympics. He didn't consider them to be real sports. He knew there were some people who felt the same way about motorsports, but he felt comfortable telling those people they were wrong.

But as much as he thought e-sports were a bad joke, he didn't have much ill will toward the individual athletes who competed in them. They were honest about what they were doing and they stayed in their own separate events. They did not clutter up the real athletic competitions with their couch-potato-ness.

So he felt very sorry for Joe Farley and Rodney Kimble when he saw the leaked video of them being raced like dogs down the hallway of the hotel where the Cassadagan delegation were staying. They didn't deserve that. Qiang knew how hard it was trying to live down that sort of public humiliation. A video clip of a Sherpa college student running after him shouting about chaining him to her bad and tearing his clothes off with her teeth had once aired on national television as part of a comedy show in the Sherpa Empire, and the video clip had inspired a variety of obscene memes and fanfic. He wrote to Farley and Kimble urging them to stay strong, and posted on Spacebook saying that Stacie Morrow, Cara Clements, and Rachel Courtney were a disgrace to their country. "Real Cassadaguo sportwomen like Stacie Houston or national baseball team don't do like this," he added. "This just trashy."

----‭֎-‬---

[Kalosia]

Kalosia u l'Olimpiade is brought to you by Lë Punto Kotidianu.

Day 2 Recap (part 2)

In the Dressage segment of Equestrian sports, Kalosian athlete Agnes Bušaristë obtained a score of 41.3, coming 30th out of 114 athletes. She tied with Kriegiersien's Strong Soldier who had achieved the same score. Krytenian athlete Graham Barton took the lead with a score of 31.6.

In Sailing, Romeo Paskal is now 20th in the standings of Men's One-Person Dinghy, after coming 11th and 18th respectively (out of 37) in the 3rd and 4th races. South Covello's Windbert Ellied tops the leaderboard, with a current score of 14.

The first two races for Heavyweight Dinghy were held today, and Ǧiankarlu Moneto came 27th out of 35. He had finished 19th in the first race and 31st in the second race. Meanwhile, Vangaziland's Gary Carr and Titaniumlandish Roebeen Sharma are tied for first place so far, with Carr having won the first race and Sharma having won the second.

In Men's Windsurfer, the 4th to 6th races were held. Klaudio Armandi is now 21st in the standings, having come 33rd, 11th, and 30th in the last 3 races respectively. Republican Bashir Shishani leads the board, having made it into the top 2 of each of today's races, including winning two of them.

In One's Person Dinghy, the 3rd and 4th races were held. Anita Morande came 8th and 16th respectively out of 35 in today's races, which was enough to lift her standing to 21st, although it is still far from the top, where Liventian Rhonwen Gill lays.

In Women's Heavyweight Dinghy, the first two races were held. Maria Veranu came 29th out of 33 in both races. Although she did not come last in either, all of the athletes finishing below her in either race did better in the other. Therefore, Veranu currently lays last in the rankings. In the lead, meanwhile, is Main Nation Ministry's Gargi Nani.

The fourth and sixth races of Women's Windsurfer were held today. Again, Maria Veranu competed. Her performance here, however, is much better than in Women's Heavyweight Dinghy. Having come 10th, 21st, and 5th in today's races, she now stands 11th out of 30, while Liventian Louisa Morse leads.

---

Gabbani Magazine

The latest on Kalosian living and lifestyle.

Five Ways to Maintain Hygge When You Tune in to the Olympics

It's Olympic season again, and you know what that means: Lots of hours spent in front of the TV while you cheer on your favourite athletes! Of course, in this winter weather you'd want to keep it warm and cozy while you do so. That said, here are five ways to make sure you don't lose that nice hygge vibe as you watch the world's biggest sporting event.

1. Bring a blanket

Everyone knows the best way to keep cozy is to hide under a nice, thick blanket. Bring your favourite quilt to the couch, and it'll help you keep warm while you watch swimmers and sailors battle the freezing waters.

Don't have one? Here are some of our top picks:
Green cashmere quilt, ⌘120
Faux fur blanket, ⌘240
Striped cotton throw, ⌘75

2. Put on some socks

Some sports, like Judo and Diving, require the athletes to be barefoot. But, unless you're an Olympian, this probably doesn't apply to you. Keep your toes warm, and you could support our athletes while doing so by wearing any pair of these:

Team Kalosia Official Socks, ⌘25
I Heart Kalosia socks, ⌘12
Blue socks with white crescent pattern, ⌘8

3. Dim the lights

Athletes who focus on the goal can't afford to be distracted. Similarly, don't let your eyes lose focus. Eliminate visual distractions by turning off or down any bright lights you have, and keep your attention on our Olympians on the TV screen, where it should be.

Here are some lighting options to make sure even your eyes can feel hygge:
Battery operated faux tealights, ⌘15
Ocean-scented candles, ⌘35
LJUS table lamp, ⌘140
Simple string lights, ⌘12

4. Bring out the snacks

What is coziness without your favourite warm beverage? You bet those triathlon runners enjoy a nice cup of hot cocoa after having to run, swim, and bike. Brew yourself a nice pot of tea, coffee, or hot chocolate, and maybe get your favourite pastry or a tray of cookies from the local bakery to enjoy while watching the Olympics.

Make sure to bring out your favourite mug. Or, use one of these:
Kalosian flag mug, ⌘20
Koala Tea mug, ⌘25
Matcha Love mug, ⌘18

5. Invite a Friend

The best way to enhance any of the previous tips is to share them! For true hygge, you could watch the games with your loved ones, or you could invite some friends to cheer on together. In our next article, we'll show you how to throw the best watching party for the Olympics.

[Siovanija and Teusland]

STBC News

Sports

Olympics Underway For Siovanija and Teusland Athletes

Olympics Off to ‘Fantastic’ Start for Siovanija and Teusland On Day 1

The action has well and truly kicked off for Siovanija and Teusland at the Olympic Games, with several of our athletes having gotten their competitions underway. The first few days have been filled with anticipation, celebration, and heartbreak, and we’ll recap it all.

The first event of the games involving Siovanija and Teusland came through the Men’s Archery individual ranking round. Marius Bergen and Jens Thorn were taking part in the event, neither expected to do any damage here. However, both Bergen and Thorn exceeded expectations, with Bergen scoring 671 and Thorn scoring 664, good for 7th and 14th places respectively. It was a career-high score for Thorn, who was quite proud of both himself and his teammate: “We knew we were the first ones up, so to speak, and I think Marius and I can be proud of what we’ve done here today. Hopefully we can keep it up into the next round.” Marius Bergen will face Racen Pelletier of Vakolicci Haven and Celeria, who ranked 122nd, while Thorn will take on Jacob Wright of Britonisea, who ranked 115th.

It was up to Liselotte Schierer in the Women’s Archery individual ranking round to match their great performances, and she did just that. With President Joachim Fleiss in attendance, Schierer managed a score of 659 which was good enough for 4th place overall. Schierer, the young archer who comes from the ranks of the military’s Mountain Special Forces, appeared pleased with her performance, and confirmed that feeling to the media: “Yes of course I’m happy, but there is so much more that needs to be done if I am to achieve my goal at these Olympics.” Also in the event was Ivana Maneva, who scored a 646 and placed 27th. Schierer will receive a bye to the Round of 64, while Maneva takes on Matilda Bostragenis of the Vakolicci Haven, who ranked 102nd.

Elsewhere, it was a Southwestern showdown in Women’s Football, as Siovanija and Teusland’s national women’s football team kicked off against Banija. The match was fairly even in the first half, with each team managing two goals. The Goldhorns’ first came through Lala Zhelyava, who hit a volley from just inside the box past the keeper. Banija scored twice after that, however, to go 2-1 up. Isabelle Kruger would equalize for the Goldhorns, however, from the penalty spot on the edge of half time.

In the second half, the Goldhorns came out flying, and it was Kruger that struck a low shot into the bottom right corner to give them a 3-2 lead. Siovanija and Teusland managed the game well as the clock ticked closer to 90, and eventually Kruger would complete her hat-trick with a goal in the 83rd minute to make the score 4-2 and put the game out of question. Both Zhelyava and Kruger, predicted to be the leaders of this team, put in the performances expected of them and that was what the Goldhorns required. The other Group G match saw Elejamie and Sargossa manage a 4-4 draw, putting Siovanija and Teusland first in the group after the opening match.

Sailing was the next event on the calendar, with Thomas Fischer (Men’s One-Person Dinghy) , Miriam Hennig (Women’s One-Person Dinghy) and Arnold Alt (Men’s Windsurfer) getting underway before the Opening Ceremonies took place. Thomas Fischer managed to rank in a tie for 5th after the first 2 races, in which he placed 10th and 3rd. Arnold Alt ranked tied for 4th after the first 3 races, while Hennig ranked tied for 9th after her first two races. Arnold Alt in particular performed far beyond any expectations, with few considering him a contender in the event.

Two of our nation’s swimmers took to the pool as well in the Women’s 100m Butterfly heats, with Tzena Tsvetkova and Lilyana Markova in action. Tsvetkova posted a time of 58.94, good enough for 3rd in her heat. Markova did a bit better, placing second in her heat with a time of 58.72. It was not good enough for either to qualify for the final, however, with Markova finishing .21 seconds off the pace, ranked 19th overall. With the top 16 qualifying from the event, that was sadly not good enough to advance. “Of course it’s a disappointment, but 19th is still a finish I’m proud of. I’ve got a new goal obviously now in training, and that’s to be back stronger next time.”

Day 2 Sees More Athletes In Action

After the opening ceremony celebrations in Republica, day 2 of competition began. The Opening Ceremonies had been an enjoyable experience for the athletes, with our delegation enjoying their debut on the international Olympic stage. “It was a really fun night, and one I don’t think any of us will forget,” commented footballer Eliza Stoeva.

Not present at the Opening Ceremony, however, were members of the men’s football team, preferring to rest before their big opener against Sargossa. Sargossa had been the Goldhorns’ opponent in World Cup 81 Qualifiers, with the sides trading wins, 5-2 for Sargossa and 3-2 for the Goldhorns. Obviously, the two squads at the Olympics were different, but players like Thorsten Kramer and Lutz Daschner had faced the Sargossans before. President Joachim Fleiss was in attendance as the teams kicked off their Olympic opener.

The first half saw Sargossa largely dominate the play, as they jumped out to a 2-0 lead in the first 25 minutes. The Goldhorns dug deep, however, and Linus Segert managed to get back a goal for the team from a well-placed shot to the left side of the goal. Sargossa would manage to get another goal, however, from a free kick given away by Lozen Pironev to the right side. That sent the teams down the tunnel with Sargossa ahead 3-1.

A turnaround would come in the second half, however, with the Goldhorns this time striking early. Anton Dimitrov headed in a ball from a free kick taken by Thorsten Kramer to make the score 3-2, while Kramer himself would knock in a ball that fell to him perfectly just at the penalty spot off a corner. Sargossa took back the lead with just 14 minutes to play, a powerful strike that beat Yanko Zhelyaskov to the right post. However, the Goldhorns had not yet quit, and Horst Hackl, who’d been brought on for Varban Spasov to add one more force up top, managed to convert his first chance of the game to level the score. 4-4 the match finished, an exciting way to get the proceedings underway. Elsewhere in Group B, The Sherpa Empire defeated Taeshan 2-1, Illahee blew out Benjamin Mark 5-0, and the hosts Free Republics defeated Mitra and Soma 3-0.

Men’s Tennis saw Kolyo Bunev take on Republican Bruno Thomson. Bunev was considered the underdog on the day, and he could not play spoiler to Thomson in his homeland. Thomson won the first set 6-4, before easily handling Bunev 6-0 in the second set. There’s still hope for us here, however, with Lukas Bahr, seeded 90th, facing off against Jiang Zemin (39) from Laeral in the Round of 128.

The woman’s side of the Tennis event saw much more success for Siovanija and Teusland. Marina Romanova faced Michelle Craparotta from the Kytler Peninsulae, and after splitting the first two sets 7-5 each, Romanova managed to take the third set with a 6-4 win. Gerda Strauss was also victorious, defeating Rin Ipnistre of Vekaiyu in straight sets 7-5 and 6-4. In the Round of 128, Strauss will take on Marla Gerard of Neu Engellon. Gerard is seeded 5th, while Strauss is seeded 127. Marina Romanova (117) will take on Juana Reio (12) of Vakolicci Haven. Our best hope in this competition is 19th seed Irena Kostova, she’ll face Catalina Vallejos (110) of Cosumar in her opening match.

Our sailors were back on the water on day 2, with Fischer, Alt and Hannig continuing their campaigns and Vasil Bunev - no relation to Kolyo - starting the Men’s Heavyweight Dingy event. Thomas Fischer continued his good form, placing 16th and 2nd in races 3 and 4. That leaves him in 2nd place overall in the Men’s One-Person Dinghy event. Vasil Bunev came 5th and 20th in his event, good enough for a tie for 8th place. Arnold Alt’s races 4-6 contained a 3rd place finish, and saw him also move up to 2nd place. Miriam Hennig fell off the pace, however, finishing 16th and 28th place in her 3rd and 4th races to see her drop to 17th overall. Arnold Alt has continued to perform beyond expectations, and he and Thomas Fischer have put themselves in great position as their events continue. Fischer still has 6 races plus a potential final to go, while Alt is in the same boat.

The day did not end well, however, for Siovanija and Teusland, as one of our medal hopefuls was eliminated in the first round of competition. Helmut Langschreiner, who had been flag bearer at the Opening Ceremonies, was defeated by West Phoenicia’s Rob Kellog in a unanimous decision in the Men’s Heavyweight boxing event. Langschreiner was not happy with the result, telling STBC sports “I’m very, very disappointed tonight….there’s really not much here to say. I’ll be back stronger, and I hope our athletes elsewhere can do better.”

Day 3 of the Olympic Games will see our sailors back in action, Fischer, Hannig and Bunev competing in races on the day. The women’s football team has a bye day, while our 4 remaining tennis athletes will also compete in the Round of 128 in men’s and women’s events.

That’s all for now from Republica, we’ll be back to cover all the latest results from the Games of the XIII Olympiad.

[Commonwealth of Baker Park]

MOE on SPORT

Olympics--are they the sideshow?

Moe Carlton
The Mail on Sunday Sport Columnist

There have only been a few days of competition here in Republica for the 13th Olympic Games, but there is no shortage of news that has little to do with the events on the field, court or pool.

We shouldn't be surprised, as every trip to the Federation of Free Republics has a storyline that revolves around something that has nothing to do with the Commonwealth's presence or reason for traveling here.

So far we have a controversy about the length and subject material of the Opening Ceremonies, the return of protests related to the Stand Up to Sexism movement that has been a staple of several recent multiverse events, the terrorism fears related to the nation of Amuaplye, and the most notable so far, the reports of several hazing incidents occurring within national delegations by competitors against those who are participating in the category of E-Sports.

Now, I suppose you're wondering to yourself "what the Devil is E-Sports?". These days, young folks who spend hours per day on their video game consoles have developed these gameplaying skills to where they compare the amount of time spent relative to athletic endeavors.

Far be it for me to make a judgment on whether or not their claim is legitimate, but at least 2 incidents have involved these E-Sports participants being treated in such ways that are not just playful teasing of fellow citizens in the spirit of camaraderie, but as punitive intimidation, solely based on the fact that they are not "athletes".

You know I have made many arguments that there are things that are "sports" and there are "athletic competitions". But regardless, these are all individuals representing their nations, and if you are disrespecting your fellow citizens, have we lost sight of what the Olympics are supposed to be?

Moe on Sport appears twice a week in The Daily Mail and every other week in The Mail on Sunday.

[Amuaplye]

It was late at night, around 12:00 AM local time.

But that didn't stop the bomber. Slurping away at ramen, listening to classical music, all the while constructing his latest device.

Solder this, attach that, write this down, look this stuff up... and the pain of having to stuff it all into a tiny pipe, then try to make sure that the nails and everything didn't come off in transit.

He was already frustrated at the fact that his newest bombs didn't go off. This time, he made sure that it would go off. And that it would actually make it to its destination.

I mean, it was a surprise that his ISP wasn't already pitching a fit to the AIA about it all. His search history made him look very suspicious.

The Omagh bombings, the Unabomber, his own crimes, Google Maps data about the targets, et cetera.

But at last, after a few hours of tireless work, his new device was complete.

He stuffed it into a small box, and wrote down the info needed.

On the recipient address, he put:

DELILAH QUINN
AMUAPLYE NATIONAL OLYMPIC COMMITTEE
LEVEL 4, 140 GEORGE ST,
MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART,
SYDNEY 2000

On the return address, he also put:

LOGAN PEEL
280 HECTOR STREET
PERTH, 6060

He then just set it in a drawer, and waited for later.

---

Later, at about 10:00 AM, the bomber entered the local post office.

"Hello, what can I do for you?" The lady at the desk asked.

"Um, madam, I've ran out of stamps. Do you have any, particularly the surfing Father Christmas one?" The bomber asked back.

Why did I even ask that? I'm now extremely suspicious. Now granted, this is a just in case thing. Though, I'll probably get caught before I can use these stamps.

The lady shook her head. "No. We do not. Do you still want Christmas stamps? We have a few if you want some." The lady went into another room, and gave the bomber a paper copy of all of the stamps they still had.

"I'll take the World War I stamps." The bomber pointed at the 5 they still had.

"Which ones?"

"Any of them will do."

"OK..." She went back again, only to come out a good minute or two later with a roll of stamps.

Perfect.

He grabbed the stamps, and walked off to another part of the post office. Haphazardly putting in the stamps, though good enough for the postage to be paid, before shoving it into the mail slot, and hurriedly leaving the post office.

Success. All of these terrorist acts will be for a good cause. They must pay for their actions.

[Vilitan Union]

The Report from Republica :: Cheerleaders Failing Left and Right on Vilitan Union

After competing separately at the XIII Winter Olympic Games in Prescott, Vilita and Turori have united once more in the Summer Games in the Free Republics. The games location in Republica will be familiar to Vilitan and Turorian faithful after the excitement of the recently completed World Cup 81 Finals in the Free Republics where the Tropics of Vilita defeated the Island Emirate of Turori in the World Cup Semi-Final before lifting the World Cup at the CoCoCo Stadium in the Free Republics by defeating South Covello in the Championship match. A select handful of those players involved from both sides will be in the Free Republics competing in the Mens Football Competition where they will look to re-claim the Olympic Gold Medal that they lost in Vekaiyu. The Vilitan Union has been a strong competitor on the international football scene not just in the World Cup competitions but in the Olympic Games having swept both the Mens and Womens Football competition Gold Medals during the XI Summer Olympiad.

The Womens team have already gotten off to a poor start in competition losing their tournament opening matchup to the XII Summer Olympiad hosts Kelssek. As defending champions, much more was expected of the Vilitan Union women and they will certainly have their work cut out for them the rest of the way in their five-team Group. The Vilitan Union mens side nearly got off to an equally bad start before scoring a late equalizer against Amuaplye to salvage a point. While catastrophe was mildly avoided it will be a rough road for the Vilitan Union men to recover from particularly as they will have to compete against their local rivals Cocoabo Forest in Group C competition. The Cocoabo are defending Olympic Silver Medalists in the event having lost the XII Summer Mens Football Title to Darmen who will, appropriately, be contesting the group stage portion of the tournament in Group D.

The poor results on the opening day of competition were a stark contrast to Vilita and Turori's closing team sport matches in the XIII Winter Olympics in Prescott where the Turorian team won the Mens Ice Hockey Tournament with a 2-1 Overtime victory against Taracy while the Vilitan team won the Womens Ice Hockey tournament with a 1-0 victory over Usniya. It was the Vilitan Unions first gold medal performances in each event.

While the Mens and Womens Football teams struggled in their opening matches, the defending Olympic Gold Medalist Womens Rugby Sevens team did get off to a winning start in their medal defense with a 29-7 victory over Mitra and Soma. It was one of the few bright spots in an otherwise disappointing start across the opening two days of the Olympic Games for the Vilitan Union. Some are blaming the poor performances on the fact that the Vilitan Union Cheerleaders were not present at any of the opening team sport matches for the Vilitan Union to cheer the team on as they were busy preparing for their participation in the Cheerleading Demonstration event. If the Mens Cheerleading event results are anything to go off of, however, it is possible that the Vilitan Union teams are better off without their Cheerleaders as their men finished last among the 16 competing cheer squads.

Vilitan Union Olympic Delegation Player Spotlight :: Noreli Miapa, Womens Individual Épée
One upcoming matchup with an interesting story line behind it is the Womens Individual Épée. Noreli Miapa grew up with a love of sports but didn't have the stamina to run long distances due to shortness of breath caused by continued strenuous athletic activity. The small strategic and sometimes aerobic movements required in the sport of Fencing, however, were just the perfect amount of athleticism and strategy for the young Miapa to take on. Growing up in Lopinka, Vilita's Colonial Capital and home to the Lopinka National Stadium, Miapa frequented Vilita National Team matches so the fact that she entered the Épée competition seeded 13th while her upcoming Round of 16 opponent Roza Dratchev was seeded 68th immediately caught Miapa's attention. The number 13 is, of course, historically significant to Vilitan Footsport Fans as it was in the 13th World Cup that Helmut Vilkaous famously led the Vilitan National Team through their first ever World Cup Qualifying campaign, warning all opponents of the threat that the Vilitans posed them. Of course, they weren't really that big of a threat in World Cup 13 but by the time World Cup 68 rolled around the Vilitan National Team was one of the best. So it was ironic indeed as Miapa would notice that her Round of 16 opponent from the host nation was assigned the 68th seed. Vilita famously won its first World Cup of the modern era during World Cup 68 which was, just like these current Olympic Summer Games, hosted in the Free Republics.

Dratchev will not be the first opponent that Noreli Miapa has faced from the host nation, however, as the Vilitan fencer had to get past Selima Rajci in the Round of 64 and it wasn't easy with the Vilitan advancing 15-13. Miapa's Round of 32 matchup was slightly less competitive defeating Kelsea Jacqueline 15-10 and setting up the Round of 16 clash with the Republican Roza Dratchev. Noreli Miapa has friends and family in attendance and will be advancing beyond the Round of 32 for the first time in their competitive olympic-level fencing career as they look to ride this wave of momentum onward to a first ever Olympic medal performance.

[Free Republics]

Day 3 Cutoff

[Porabasta]

The Olympic Review: Day 1 and 2

Nicki Luiz - The Daily Moon


Day 1:
And so it begins. The greatest show on earth. It began with a rather tedious opening ceremony that never seemed to end. Many were forced to switch channels in order to avoid collapsing with boredom and disgust, but we all got through it alive thankfully. Porabasta didn't have anyone competing in day 1 but enjoyed watching sports such as archery and gridiron that have never been seen back home. Naturally, at an event this big there was no shortage of controversy. Many travelling Porabastians joined other countries in quietly (and some not so quietly) protesting the inclusion of esports at the Olympics. In Porabasta esports are seen as an insult to real athletes and competitive esports players are often met with mockery and disdain. The president filmed himself going on a drunken rant in his hotel room as the men's RTS event was playing on the television in the background. "Why is this in the Olympics?! Aren't the Olympics meant to promote being healthy? Look at them, they sit around all day staring at screens and they call this a sport now? Absolute disgrace. Look at that one he looks like he's never been outside a day in his life. You know what I'm going to ban this crap when we get home. Bunch of lazy bastards" Unexpectedly, the video was actually met with praise from Porabastians due to the president's honesty. He was even encouraged to make more videos. The president is considering a mytube channel.

Day 2:
Now the proper Olympics have begun after the slog that was the opening ceremony. The main talking point was the men's road race final. Flagbearer Thiago Ocampos came 21st, 3 minutes behind gold medallist Panji Alam. Ocampos was visibly distraught at not winning a medal, but vows to come back stronger at the next Olympics. However Ocampos's teammate Ernesto Quesada came a respectable 7th, achieving his goal of reaching the top 10. Quesada said he was proud of his performance in what's likely to be his only Olympic games considering he's 33. Jesus Lozano and Antonio Gutierrez were both unable to finish the race due to a hamstring injury and a crash respectively.

Elsewhere, Porabasta had a very succesful day in aquatics. The men's 100m breastroke was a particular highlight with Bailey Fernandez qualifying with the second best time (59.54 which I've been told is very impressive) and Fabio Sanchez qualified in 5th with a time of 59.94. Both will fancy their chances at reaching the final. Meanwhile in the men's 400m medley Fabio Sanchez was really unlucky to miss out on the final by just 0.09 of a second. The small margins between success and failure in the Olympics are incredible. The women's 4x100m relay team (which consists of Chiquita Cabrera, Cierra Santos, Lulu Daniella and Kalea Ramirez) were also very impressive as they came second securing a spot in the final.

In hockey Porabasta defeated Electrum 2-0 to go top of the group with two goals from Manuel Lozano. Manager Jose Correa said he was proud of what was a comfortable and professional win and backs Porabasta to make it far in the competition.

In boxing, Javi Carlos and Ivan Reyes were both in action. Javi Carlos saw off Rafael Nash from Electrum in the men's lightweight preliminary round with a unanimous decision. Meanwhile in the men's heavyweight preliminary round, number 2 seed Ivan Reyes comfortably beat Jelly Fish from Vakolicci Haven and Celeria (don't worry I didn't know they existed either). Reyes was confused and didn't know to expect when a literal giant jellyfish hopped in to the ring. Reyes was able to dispatch of it easily, winning by a unanimous decision but came out of it feeling confused, disgusted and slightly violated.

Finally, the men and women's tennis singles both had their first round. Alex Causas beat Oryan Mikhailovich (AXV) 7-5, 5-7, 6-4. Max Aguilla beat Oryan's brother Zane Mikhailovich in straight sets 6-2, 6-4. Meanwhile for the women, Fatima Zoido, dispatched of Myra Carsha (TAE) 7-5, 6-1. However, Irena Gaos lost a painfully close match against Tonya Milk (also TAE) 7-5, 3-6, 14-12. She said afterwards that it was the most mentally and physically exhausting match of her life and that she was very disappointed not to win. She also wished Milk the best of luck in the next round.

So overall it was a relatively successful day for Porabasta, here's what you have to look forward to on day 3:

▪Bailey Fernandez and Fabio Sanchez will compete in the men's 100m breastroke semi finals
▪Porabasta will be one of the favourites in the women's 4x100m relay final
▪The women's basketball team will play their first game
▪Porabasta's female boxers will compete in their preliminary round
▪There's a second medal event, the women's road race
▪Both the men and women will compete in the table tennis round of 64 and the tennis round of 128

[Kriegiersien]

Conference at the Kriegiersien Kolors, one of the nations biggest print media.

The publishers desk is surrounded by his underlings. He (the publisher, not the desk) begins to speak unusual softly

Ok, ladies and gents, we have to talk about the coverage of the Olympics. What is this?

he shows a page with tables and statistics

The results of the Olympics. Who has won, who has silver, who has bron…

Whohaswon, whohassilver….can you even hear yourself talking, I am falling asleep right now! If you have to make tables write them small and short or at least colourful, create interesting spreadsheets and charts. If the people want to see schedules and statistics they can go to the webnet. What is that?

Not our newspaper?

Yeah, genius, but what does it say?

INDUSSE DEFEATED STARBLADYIA
indusse defeats starbladyia for 2-4 yesterday.

Fantastic, a headline. Good. Big letters, great news for the patriots, an okayish start. But what does follow inside? Nothing. Just the group, and numbers again. No comments nor speeches of politicians. No drama, no cheering, no tears, what the fans did or the players. Like a young striker keeping cool at the penalty kick. No David against Goliath storyline. That is a ‘How not to do it’ example.

So likewise no detailed reports about the matches? Explaining the surface in tennis or rules?

Deep analyses are for sport magazines. But If something interesting or better shocking happens, that is our bred and butter. If a player gets injured, a streaker gets on the field, fruits are thrown. Whatever. A player thanking his crazy god or crying because of the death of his uncle or dog..

A dog that enters the field.

If it is a cute dog or if he bites someone, I’m buying it. Did that happen?

I don’t know…

Why do you mention it then? The people want to be entertained. Get the stories that make them angry, sad or afraid.



About bombings? Terrorists?

Are there any great stories involved? Crying family members? Interviews with the terrorists about their goals? Do they have an interesting weapon? Or are they handsome and have a righteous cause?

Well, I don’t know..

Then fabricate one. I want cruel monsters destroying the society, the danger that the Olympics have to be stopped. Panic, the state wanting to censor us and then…. wait.. that wouldn’t be good…

So, we should go on with writing about our athletes?

Not only our folks. Yes, they have priority, but this is an international event. Rivalries between the nations. Us against sworn enemies, old feuds.

We haven’t taken part in many championships outside the Olympics, so there are not many rivalries or histories behind…

Time to make some. For now do interesting story lines about interesting people. Tragic losses. Maybe fights within the team. Pretty against ugly. Robots against humans.

But the robots are.. how to put it.. lame to be honest.

Even the Rugby players? Rugby is a popular sport, right?

We have no robots in the Rugby teams as far as I know. We never had androids in team sports.

I am pretty sure I had read differently. However, make something up. Let the robots spray their opponents with acid and rip off their skin. Claim that the opponent is a second rate bunch of losers that have never made it to the World Cup or only play with elder men. Nasty sponsor deals. The corruption of modern sports, the powerful commerce behind it. Or the story of the self made athlete, working himself up out of nothing. Anything.

So we are making politics?

No, you amateurs, we are making circulation.

I have a report about how our E-Sport team trains. 14 hours lone streaming in front of the monitor…

the speaker gets a fatal gaze

Get out of my sight!

the addressed Journalist runs out, the publisher looks around

Oh, come on, think of something. Make the results less boring. Exaggerate. If someone wins he is a god, a record is for eternity that will never be broken, if someone loses it is the end of his career. Something has to be foul, the coach, the referees, the gods, drugs, unfair play..

Kelssek bribed the referee in Rugby.

Very good. Sources?

I will find some.

Good girl. Now you got it.

[The Sherpa Empire]

Mohammed Wang is the first Sherpa to win an Olympic medal after taking silver in the 400m freestyle. Wang was seen as an underdog racing against highly-regarded swimmers like Marko Radovlija, Levo Navikala, and Yeri Mikislavi. Patriotic Sherpa sports fans might have predicted that he would take home a medal, but for everyone else, the result is a bit of an upset.

Hometown fans were happy to see Republican swimmer Noah Johansson take the gold.

"There is a lot of tough competition in the swimming events, so I didn't know how well I would do," Wang said. "I'm happy that I won the silver medal, and the Olympics are just getting started, so I hope this is just the beginning. But no matter what happens, I'm happy that I got to be here and represent the Empire and that I was able to win a medal. Congratulations to Noah."

In other Olympics news, table tennis players Jibang Xiu and Yun Xia advanced to the round of 32, the Sherpa women's basketball team lost to Electrum 77-72, Tashi Sherchen narrowly missed out on a bronze medal in judo when he was defeated by Joshua Halliday, and Lhami Sherpa bested Katie Lucic on the tennis court.

Amuaplye has been rattled by a series of mail bombs, some of which targeted their Olympic athletes, but Sherpa officials do not believe there is any danger to the Empire's athletes or Sherpa sports fans that have gone to Republica to watch the Olympics. Republican authorities seem to have a good handle on security. Some events were delayed due to an emergency session of the Assembly, but it was not immediately obvious if the emergency had any connection to the Olympics or the bomb attacks. The Sherpa Ministry of Culture put out a reminder that travelers should be aware of their surroundings and avoid conflicts with locals or other visitors, but said that the bombings and the meeting of the Assembly do not appear to be related to anything that involves the Sherpa Empire.

Lhami Sherpa still said she was concerned about the news coming from Amuaplye, and that it was an unwelcome reminder of her own experience with the Taliban.

[Vangaziland]

A good deal went on behind the scenes that news articles may not have picked up on Day 3 of the XIII Olympiad. This was a day that saw Vannish heartbreak and success. Most would say the good would outweigh the bad. The girls of Spirit Vangaziland would be forced to accept mixed results. They had trained to intense levels for this event. The ladies had dreams of being the best.

This would not come to fruition. The team brought a dynamic routine. There was a mix of tumbling, aerials and dance. The pressure of the moment overwhelmed some of the girls. The spotlight would rest heaviest on Eva Cszonka.

Eva stumbled just slightly on a landing from a tumble. Most saw it as one of the clearest mistakes that saw Vangaziland fall from a demonstration medal. All other things considered, Vangaziland would have at least placed 3rd. Although this was a demonstration event, Vannish recordkeeping notched demonstration medals.

Eva was having the hardest time on the team. All of the others seemed to know each other from conference events. Eva came from an Esportivan school. She didn't feel like she really felt in with the others. That slight lack of chemistry was behind the collapse of Spirit Vangaziland. The day's news was not all bad.

Right after everyone had changed and prepared to board the bus, Stina Karlsson gathered the team around. "Listen up!" Her voice was almost aggressive "All of you gather round." Many had to wonder what kind of speech (or berating) she was prepared to render.

"Two reasons for all of you to keep your head up", said the Captain. She felt like she had failed her team. She was supposed to lead them to glory. "One, we beat West Phoenicia. They had it coming." There were a few deflated giggles from the crowd.

Stina had been saving the best news for last. Her voice suddenly became excited. "And two... We just got word that our program will expand into international sports. We're going to be covering the next International Basketball Championships. We'll all be on the World Bowl squad. Even top tier lacrosse!"

It was exciting news for the ladies. They were all just college athletes. Excited cheers and loud communication broke out in the hall they had gathered in. "We're going to see the world", called out Gunhild Palmcrantz.

"Is this amateur or pro?" Liz Marsden was curious how the process would work.

"We're eligible for a pro contract after graduation", Stina called out excitedly. Her coach recently shared the news with her after she got an email. "They just want to keep us on the team."

"We're going to be famous", Kira Moller screeched. She clasped her hands together and yelled a war cry.

"We'll be pro cheerleaders", Teana Lord called out.

The group milled about for some time until it was time to board the bus. They found a stowaway waiting for them near the back. Matt Theobold coordinated a ride with the team. Since they had gotten bad press over the way he was treated, the coach allowed it. He was a Vannish athlete, or at least had the badge.

Liz Marsden immediately sat in the row behind Matt and Eva. Liz was Stina's eyes and ears. She was also the captain's muscle. If Stina was interested in Eva and Matt's relationship, so was Liz. Stina couldn't make her views known since she was the team leader. She was supposed to be impartial. She was just worried about her team's reputation. Who was this guy again?

An extremely drained Eva soon fell asleep on Matt's lap. She was pretty sad about her role in the team's loss. Liz took the moment to pounce. "So... Theobold. Don't you think it would be nice to donate one of your meal vouchers to a lady? Be chivalrous."

"Liz. I'm not giving you my vouchers." Matt's voice was shaky. There was a free dining facility on the campus the Vangazi (and some other) athletes were staying at. The Vannish delegation gave each of their athletes a certain amount of vouchers good for buying food anywhere in town. The Vannish government paid in advance for these notes.

Liz was trying to collect extra ones so she and the girls could go to expensive restaurants. She knew she could get at least 50 NSD worth of tickets from Matt. Besides! Matt owed her. She allowed him to date Eva, or at least that's what Liz thought. Seriously. Everybody on the cheer team should be talking Eva into dating a track star, a biker or something else rugged. Instead she fell for this gamer's charm.

"It's not about vouchers!" Liz had a bit of aggression in her voice. She twisted her head and spoke much more softly. She batted her eyes to try looking innocent. "I mean. I just think we can be friends. I'm collecting them for a team function, is all. You scratch my back now, I can scratch yours later." Liz reached forward between the seats to grasp his shoulder. Her palm kneaded firmly against his collarbone. His tense reaction eventually sunk with his head as he sighed. It felt too good.

"Okay", he said. "I don't have anything on me though." If Liz was going to add massage to her interrogation tactics, Matt was ready to cave.

"I'll meet you after breakfast to collect", Liz said as she leaned back in her chair. She knew she could make him collapse. Her memory was suddenly jolted. "Hey!" Her voice changed from pleased to agitated. "Do you know what you've done?"

"What?" Matt had an almost worried tone in his voice. The entire time Eva slept in Matt's lap.

"You're getting people in trouble", said the 4'11 blonde Marsden. "I keep hearing people complaining about eSports bullying in the papers. They don't know it's just you and I playing around. You're such a sob story."

"Liz, it's not my fault that people call you out for picking on people. You've been literally trying to take my lunch money. I'm pretty sure you could be charged with extortion at this point."

"Technically not until after I collect", Liz said with a giggle. "Which I will do tomorrow... After breakfast."

Matt sighed as the bus hit a bump. He used the chance to slightly rock Eva in his arms. Her dark green eyes looked so sleepy as they opened and closed again. "Oh Eva. Eva you're up!" Matt tried speaking to her. Eva just groaned. She didn't want to wake up. "What? What were you saying Eva?" He tried desperately to get her to wake up. The others on the bus were caught up in their own conversations. They didn't care about Matt or Liz.

"There's no magazine to save you now", Liz said in a villainous voice. She let out an eerie giggle which reverberated across the Republican charter bus. It stopped as she paused to watch Matt's reaction. He froze. This caused a deeper laugh. She loved bothering Eva's boyfriend.

Sometimes Matt wondered why Eva looked at him so often. Did she actually like him?

---

The cheerleaders may have fallen short of their mark. The Vangaziland Olympiad Delegation would find success on the regulation side of things in Women's Archery Team competition.

Vangaziland's male archers stepped up with a huge day two performance. The women were following a silver medal winning event. Many wondered if the women would even come close to that mark. There was more hope than belief. Women's archery hit the news when Phoenician archer Lady Amelia Defence-Heywood was quoted as saying the appearance of other competitors was like 'lipstick on a pig'.

Buttessen placed higher than Lady Defence in earlier individual competion. The Vangazi was never considered one of the world's best. Many considered her early success a fluke. If the ladies would have any chance at success, Arianne would have to be at her best.

Vangaziland beat Sargossa 219-213 in the round of 32. They beat Taeshan 219-213 in the round of 16. Vangaziland stepped up their accuracy in the Quarterfinals with a 224-206 victory. Arianne was the difference. She had seen a video of Vannish cheerleaders referring to her earlier success against Lady Defence. Maybe Arianne realized how much success here would mean to so many people.

The Vangazi fought a low scoring battle against South Covello. The Vangazi snuck away 212-208. It was a tally which likely would have seen the Vangazi fall against other teams. This would have seen the Vannish fall out of the gold medal match. Free Republics defeated West Phoenicia 226-220 on the other side of the tournament. The Republicans put up a score 227 earlier in the event. They clearly looked favored to win the gold medal match between them and the Vangazi.

The men's team score also took a slight dip towards the end of the tournament. Fatigue comes into play in later rounds. Mental stress is even worse than the physical effort. The Vannish ladies won with a strong 222-218 performance over the Free Republics. There were two reasons for the Vannish win. Elissa Hill was strong throughout the event. She shouldered the load as the most talented archer on the team. She started the event with 4 bullseye 10 pointers in a row.

Danby Nielsen also had to step up. Her last two shots were 10s. Things may have been different if she shot 8s at those times.

"I've never faced so much pressure", said Nielsen. "It was amazing to push beyond my limit... Gold! I can't believe it." Scouts noticed a clear difference in skill between Nielsen and her teammates. The way she stepped up will surprise many who follow the sport in Vangaziland. Her old coaches will be extremely impressed. She entered the Olympiad a neophyte. She returns to The Empire as an Olympiad Gold Medalist.

"This is going to give our national program so much experience.", said Elissa Hill. "The delegation can really develop our archery program. We can build from this success. The Empire still has this moment. This medal." The tall brunette smiled. "There's even more archery left. We'll need to step up for one more day."

[Cassadaigua]

Meeting The Athletes, Sport By Sport (Part II), and more
by Hannah Marshall, Olympic Correspondent

As most of Cassadaigua celebrates Stacie Houston winning the NSSCRA 7 championship last night, the focus will become on the World Lacrosse Championships playoffs that will be played in Cassadaigua, so there is some stuff out there for the sports fan. However, we are also in the opening days of the Olympics, where we draw our attention to the many other sports that one can compete in, not just the well known names. Earlier in my coverage of the Olympics, we went over the sports that are early in the alphabet to talk about our athletes. This is a good time to continue that look. Plus, we’ll take a look at a pair of silvers we have earned to get us on the medal board thus far.

Equestrian

We won’t be confused with the Equestrian States, but we do put a lot of funding into equestrian. It is a sport where Cassadagans will watch just for the general artistry. There is something special about watching one of the world’s greatest animals, the horse, running with such a graceful stride, and effortlessly making the jumps that are needed. The coordination between human and animal must be perfect, or else an obstacle may not be cleared. Some say it is all on the human, but horses are smart animals, and they realize that there is something different about the competition they are in when they see so many people watching. Some respond well, and some might get a little nervous. Then, it is up to the riders to also respond to those nerves. We have seen some equestrian already take place, and the results have been a little underwhelming. One of the riders, Chelsea Sutton told us that, “It’s pressure like we have never seen before. We don’t get a chance to wait here for a week before we compete. It hits you right away.” It’s seeming doubtful now that we will medal in Equestrian, despite the earlier hopes.

Fencing

This is fun to watch. It takes you back to the days of old, and that is a large part of the appeal of the event. I probably wouldn’t want to watch a ton of it, but give me the matches that we are in, and I will get into it. On the male side, we are not expected to medal, something I say a lot in this. However, we have a couple decent combatants on the women’s side. Stephanie Winchell, in particular, should be able to win a few matches, though probably is not going to pick up a medal. That is not her mindset. “I am here to have fun. That’s what this is all about, having fun, representing the country, and winning sword fights. What is possibly better then that?” Winchell says she will hope for the best, “My goal is to have something shiny around my neck when I make it home. Tough road, but I have my sword, the force is with me, and I am going to give it my best!”

Soccer (Referenced as Football)

In soccer, it is expected that our women’s team will be a top contender, and the men’s side will not be, but don’t go thinking we’re an automatic medalists here, because there are a several great nations in the world that have amazing women as a part of their primarily national team. This is primarily our World Cup roster, though, with forward Hannah Ranucci and goalkeeper Kristen Speller looking to make a long run. “We had some momentum from the last World Cup and want to continue that in the next one,” Ranucci said, “Winning an Olympic medal in the interim will go a long way.” The team defeated Krytenia in their opener.

Golf

There are not a lot of golf competitions out there in the world, so what a great opportunity for Hannah Nelson, the top golfer in Cassadaigua for about six years, to showcase her ability against the greatest out there. Nelson understands that it is all about learning the course, “Some courses will play better to the strength of one type of golfer, and others will play to a different set of strengths. I have spent a lot of time studying the course and feel that it is definitely worthy of hosting an Olympic competition. How will the breaks go? In one tournament, one or two bad holes can ruin your medal chances. This will be a great competition.” Expect golf to be get a lot of viewership in Cassadaigua, as it is popular amongst the 50-65 and 65-plus year old age demographics. Daniel Clovedale, a retired factory worker from Winchester says, “I will not leave the house when the golf is on. Not even if it conflicts with my weekly bingo!”

Gymnastics

Well, our gymnasts have already been in the news. At least two of them, anyway. Stacie Morrow and Cara Clements are very good at what they actually came here for. Morrow, who has happy to not have to field questions about the now infamous video, and told me that, “I expect to win a medal. It will disappointing if I do not.” Clements chimed in, “If Stacie doesn’t win a medal, we might need to look for the video game guys to make another video.” The two of them laughed, again, making us wonder if they have learned their lesson. Morrow then replied, “Even if I don’t win a medal, I will be better at what I do then they will be at whatever the heck it is they play. What do they even play, Cara?” Clements shook her head. When told they play a trading card game, the gymasts were even more confused, “Trading cards?” Morrow said and laughed again, “I mean I thought it would at least be one of those shoot ‘em up games. Trading cards? How do you even do that?” Clements replied, “If card games are an olympic sport, then why isn’t poker a demonstration event, or blackjack?”

It was an interesting interview with our gymnasts, the two of them seen as threats to win a medal, so I had to inquire to the Olympic Committee of Cassadaigua about their “we will handle the matter internally”, and what that actually meant? I was simply told that the matter was already handled.


(Break from news article: How the incident was internally handled, not known to public:)

OCC rep, “We have received word about you to in an incident concerning a couple of video game players that has been seen by millions of people.”

Morrow & Clements, “Did you like it?”

OCC rep, “It was pretty entertaining. Even Kai Qiang, the NSSCRA driver from The Sherpa Empire, viewed it and commented. Will help with ratings, good job.”

(Now back to the news article)

Handball

This is a sport. A sport we are not good at, and it will show in the standings. Next?

Hockey

Not played on ice. I shouldn’t have had to mention that since this is the summer Olympics, and not the winter ones, but I am sure there is at least one reader out there who needed that clarification. Field hockey has a slight following in our nation, and tends to be a little more popular with men, then it is women. Despite that, our women’s team is an all-star group and determined to make a name for themselves. Expect them to do well, and the men, not as much.

Judo

One of those sports that will be interesting for us to watch, but something that you are not going to watch all day. We have representation in each weight class, and perhaps we’ll win some matches, but any extended runs in the competition are pretty low. Emily Malloy is eager to compete, “I didn’t come here planning on winning a medal, I came here intending to do what I enjoy, and to see how far I can go. I know I am not the best in the world, but it is fun.”

Karate

Much along the lines of Judo, of course. We are represented here in each division as well with a similar group of athletes that might win a round or two, but probably not going to do anything more then that. Jennifer Copeland was happy to be interviewed, “To represent the country doing this, that is an honor. Karate is a passion for me. My parents got me started with it when I was a little girl, and I didn’t want to stop. They thought they would have to convince me to do it, but in the long run they had to drag me out, not in. That is, until I started landing my moves, then I gave them a bigger problem. Nah, just kidding about that. For real, ever since day one, I have loved this sport. I call it in an art.”


That will sum up our event by event look, and we have a couple silver medals to talk about, and one of them came from Brianna McCall. If you can recall part one of this series, we touched on Brianna specifically about being a bit of an aberration in cycling in Cassadaigua. Cycling, as a competitive sport, is simply not popular here. It is something seen as more recreational, and as a hobby. For the 27-year old McCall, it was passion. We touched on her having to race competitively overseas in order to get the competition she wanted, and she was hoping that what she learned would translate into success in the Olympics. In the women’s road race, McCall was in great form, but had some surprising company in the form of fellow Cassadagan Kellie Dunlap. Dunlap kept pace with McCall until the final stretch, when McCall was just a little better, to finish second. Dunlap finished fourth. Brianna was all smiles, even if she just narrowly missed the gold, “Wow, this is amazing. I am blessed to be able to win this, it has taken a lot of hard work, and a lot of time away from home. I knew I could do it, though. I can’t wait to go back to Northbury, and take this home, and show everyone. Let everyone know that no matter what your passion is, you can do great things.” Dunlap had mixed emotions, “Fourth is much better then I ever would have expected. It was just simply not as high up as I thought I would finish here, but I tuned out the outside news and just knew that racing with Brianna would be the best thing for me. As great as fourth is, to be so close to a medal is kinda tough. But I can hold my head up high.”

The other silver medal was very unexpected, earned by Jason McSheffrey in the 45kg division of weightlifting. That sentence alone is powerful, isn’t it, in terms of a statement in how far we are coming with gender equality in Cassadaigua. That was definitely not lost on Jason! “That’s right, it’s a silver! A lot of people think Cassadagan men are some second class version of masculinity, so I hope this proves that we are not! It’s not a gold, but I will take this home and cherish it!”

In other news, Rachel Courtney, the wrestler in the controversial video, has a chance at the bronze medal. Like the gymnasts above, she had her own witty answer, “Obviously I am better at wrestling then using Spacebook.”

[Kelssek]

Outgoing Council president warns principles at risk over lack of Olympic Village
JULY 11 | Nicole Cowan in Republica, Free Republics

Outgoing Olympic Council president Hayley Locklear hopes the ideals which the Olympic Games aspires to promote won't be eroded, she said in an exclusive interview with the NI as she prepares to hand over the office at the conclusion of the Summer Olympics in Republica.

"At the heart of the event is a belief that through sporting competition, we can demonstrate and promote the spirit of friendship, solidarity and cooperation in a divided and often violent multiverse. The Games exist because of a belief they can promote peace, harmony and equality between peoples, and we need to remember and hold on to those ideals now more than ever."

While quick to commend the officials in Republica for their organization of the Games, she warned that the trend of national delegations declining to house their athletes in the Olympic Village, and the move to go without such a facility entirely in Republica, endangers the traditions and objectives of the Olympic Games itself.

"I fully understand the concerns about logistics and costs that led them to make that move, but I think it was a mistake. It is however part of a longer trend which I admit we've not done enough to counter, and I am pointing the finger at myself and others in the Kelssek Olympic Committee when I say so. The self-segregation of delegations is to me the most obvious breakdown of the Olympic spirit."

"We could have been much stronger in discouraging these moves, particularly when we were the host NOC [national Olympic committee]. It's very regrettable that we didn't, and that's why I think our own failure to take a stance at that point has led us to the situation where a host organizing committee can actually treat the Olympic Village as an unnecessary expense. We have long dealt with the problem that sports are organized around nation-states, and that sport and the Olympics could be used for the kind of nationalism that draws lines between insiders and outsiders. It's always been a difficult balance."

Traditionally, all athletes are housed together in the same complex during the Olympics. While national delegations are grouped together within the Olympic Village in the interests of security and practicality, the expectation nevertheless is they would frequently encounter their counterparts from other countries and have opportunities to mingle. Indeed, this has historically gone much further than just mingling as revelations about the number of condoms provided in the past have highlighted.

While this arrangement has been the norm for most of Olympic history, incidents of pranks, "panty-raids" and condoms being used as water balloons fights between Ferkas and Coraspia during the 11th Summer Olympics in Aeropag, seem to have prompted some NOCs to abandon the Village and make separate housing arrangements for their athletes in future Games. In effect, this led to certain countries separating themselves from the rest of the athletes.

Perhaps the most notorious of these were the cruise ships and blimps utilized by the Royal Kingdom of Quebec, which residents of Novonaya complained during the 12th Summer Olympics were annoying to look at and in some cases blocking out the sun.

"I do feel sorry for those who will not get to experience what Olympians in previous Games have experienced, the coming together of people from all lands and cultures for a common purpose," said Locklear, "but even more so that this crucial aspect of the values and meaning of the Olympics is missing here."

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[OOC: I realize this could be taken as spilling over to OOC. I admit that it does reflect some of that, but is not intended to be personal and I hope it is not seen as such.]

[Todd McCloud]

Have Table, Will Achieve: Or, How Yasklavemi Got a Pool
Reporting for V3 News Services, Rin Slakori

REPUBLICA - If one were to visit the top-twenty all-time medalists in Vekaiyu (ranked by gold, silver, and bronze), by and large, they'd find swimmers and a few gymnasts, as is expected over the course of an eight-year stint from the vulpine nation. One might even suggest a boxer could exist among those ranks (and they'd be correct). However, what if we told you among that top-twenty would be Leina Iselistre, a shorter vulpine female who hails from the flattened plains of the province of Solike? Here, among the fields teeming with wheat, barley, and other staple crops exist farming communities dotted across the region. In general, these communities may or may not have a pool in their school systems and instead foster other recreational activities.

Despite that, Table Tennis is still not often a top choice among youth and adults alike in the farming province of Solike.

"Bull," Leina Iselistre dismissed when she read some of the comments left by users on our Olympic Preview for Table Tennis (still accessible on our site, of course). "Bull, bull, bull. Of course it's a sport! We don't swim laps or dive or run with intensity like in other athletic events, but these comments are entirely ridiculous. I made my way into this sport when no one gave [Vekaiyu] a chance in those games!"

Leina Iselistre indeed forged her path almost entirely on her own. In fact, the athlete's hometown of Yasklavemi has just two serviceable table tennis tables, with one in the gymnasium, the other in the seat's concourse building (similar to a grange). Only a block away is her rather humble home, sitting in a small town surrounded by waves of golden corn (in the summer months, at least). In a walkway between the front room and the kitchen sit four medals - three gold and one silver - won over the course of the seven Olympiads. Of course, they're juxtaposed between framed family photos and a secretary containing a ceramic statue of St. Aiya, filled with fresh flowers. Just above The First Sister is the Vekaiyun Flag and a picture of the Premier. Oh, and her first Olympic Paddle hangs in a spot below.

"I remember when I got this," she exclaimed as she plucked it from the wall. "The Vekaiyun government wasn't like it is now, of course. I put my name in for the sport and got selected after the [Vekaiyun Olympic] saw me play. I... sort of knew I had to leave home to train, cause there really wasn't anyone left here. Most of my friends, they left for the big cities. And I only played in big cities a few times, you know, going to provincials and stuff. Oh, and I was in the nationals my senior year."

She gripped the paddle in her classic style, hand over the handle and with four fingers gingerly holding the board in the front as she moved to sit down at her small kitchen table, the warm sun reflecting on the one window. "It was amazing to walk with the other athletes. Back then we were excited but nervous cause we were told we needed to bring honor to the state. No one really expected me to do anything. But when I knocked off the woman from Quintessence of Dust, then the one from Bears Armed, and Cafundeau, well, it was getting weird. Like, people knew my name. They said I was doing great things, but I didn't have the funding the swimmers or gymnasts did. They had really cool suits, I just had a skirt and a t-shirt." She shrugged. "I thought things would change when I defeated Terri Wogan, from the Liventian combined team, for gold. It was the greatest moment of my life. I cried when they unfurled the flag, thanking St. Aiya as I do, and receiving that medal. It... was so surreal. But you know, you know they say that when something really, really good happens, it's to prepare for something really bad. I think St. Ignes of Provinsk said that."

Indeed, when she returned home, she learned her father had died of alcohol poisoning, complications from celebrating with the townsfolk and, as he always did, partied a bit too hard and a bit too long. "He was a good man, a hard-working man as they do. I remember countless drives in our family's car, driving me to tournaments to and from while he'd work hard on the weekends to get things done. He'd give his life for his family's happiness. But we knew he was hurting. He'd never say it, but the war bothered him. You know he never would tell me what happened? I still don't know to this day. I suppose I could look it up, but if he never told me, then he'd probably not want me to know. But I do miss his strong arms." She came home to take care of her mother, who suffered a heart attack five months later.

It would seem at that point we had seen the last of Leina Iselistre. The joy of nabbing a gold for her nation didn't really reflect a boost in funding - that would go to swimming, generally, as the nation had stormed onto the scene winning a total of eleven medals. And she was unable to advance to the semifinals for the seventh and eighth summer Olympiad, with entire Table Tennis delegation suffering defeats abound. It would seem she'd become a blip on the radar, a one-off who had already lived in the shining sun of glory only to fade into the twilight.

"It was during that winter when things changed," she reminisced as she set her paddle down. "My friend, Ariyana, was in town for a bit, and we just had to meet. After a while, we got to talking and she asked why I didn't seem as sharp as I once was. I said I noticed my speed just wasn't like it was. Then she joked and said I should try to do it underwater. The next month, she invited me to her home in Calesu." There, the quarry diver had set up a sort of playing field, one that was submerged in a pool, one half of the table up, and the other side waxed with a hydrophobic finish. A lightweight puck was placed in the center. "I said what are you planning to do with that? She said you're going to work on your speed. But I couldn't swim, let alone go underwater! She had weighted shoes and one of those masks hooked up to a tank, so after she convinced me to give it a shot, I put it on and did what she told me to do - go fast by going slow."

There, she would train for several weeks, utilizing muscles she didn't normally employ during a traditional table tennis match. "I remember that stinking puck. It was orange, a lightweight underwater hockey puck they use for kids. You wouldn't think it'd zip on the table like that, but it did. Playing like that... really makes someone plan ahead, like plan their next move. And with the mask, it was kind of hard to breathe out of, so I needed to watch my endurance. But eventually, I got the confidence to play a few times over an afternoon. It was... bizarre, but was unique. I thanked her just the same and tried to offer some more money for the troubles, cause, you know, I was staying at her place all this time, but she declined and just said to go fast by going slow."

Enter the Ninth Summer Olympiad in The Kytler Bay Peninsulae. Again, overshadowed by her competition, Leina Iselistre took a breath, grabbed her new paddle, and entered the fray. She slowly began marching up the ladder, remembering her unique creole of a learned lifetime skill combined with a unique take on the sport. "I knew something special was happening when I defeated the competitor from Zwangzug. Then came the girl from Avissian Union... what was her name? Isabela Lobo! Yeah, she had a name that was wolf in some language, I was told. Anyway, I ousted her in four sets!" She slapped her paddle down for added enthusiasm. "And I took back my gold!"

She laughed when we asked if she would ever develop a sort of underwater table tennis sport. "I didn't invent it, but I wouldn't recommend it. See, it's nice in a big city, especially if you're a diver, cause you've got a lot of resources, lots of training pools, and so on. Here? Everyone knows vulpines love water, but there's work to do. The nation won't feed itself. That and it's just not practical in the slightest. But I did have an idea for my earnings. So, I had a small pool built, the smallest one I could have per the codes, and bought my friend's supplies." Ground broke sometime just after the ninth games and took just about three weeks to complete. "It's in one of the rooms in the concourse building. I got the clearance for it so long as I paid for it. But it was weird. I'd practice, and after a time I developed a following. Like, people in town thought I was nuts!"

Insane or not, Leina Iselistre would go on to win gold in Paripana and silver in Novonaya. She seems primed for another deep run in these games, where she dispatched Mia Bulan from Eraman in seven sets and looks forward to defeating her Ermanian teammate Lia Bulan in the next round. Does she have what it takes? Many would say yes, but if you ask her hometown of Yasklavemi, they'd likely say [/i]absolutely[/i].

Of course, you'd have to catch them when the high school kids aren't swimming laps in the town's only pool, Yensey Iselistre Waters, named after the father of the child who would bring glory to this small town nestled in a sea of corn. A rusting tennis table sits nearby, pulled from the waters, as swimmers do need their time in the pool, but of course, it will return when table tennis season begins.

[Benjamin Mark]

Cameron - I'm here speaking with recent Gold Medalist Rachel Sumter who just defeated Sofia Greenway of Liventia in Judo. President Sumter, first of all congratulations on your gold medal, I know Judo is your passion along with singing and acting of course.

Sumter - I also teach yoga and meditation and teach strength training classes in Carson Village. But this is huge, this is a big honor for me, not as big as being President, but still pretty big. It's not over yet, I still have the triathlon to go through. I'm pumped.

Cameron - Angie Cameron, BMNS news.