World Cup 77 - Roleplay Thread

[Red Blackiland]

Red Blackiland Sports and Off-topic Chronicles

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The fiancé

RB Ultras in the game against Chromatika

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Author : Mathias Gërdorffen

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It was bad as a kid.
He would fire a cat, cut a lizard's tail, mistreat his younger brother, and kick his mother's leg when she patted him.
Great, whenever he could, he continued his evil deeds.
He was passing his car under an overpass when he saw two very bad dressed and poor guys lying under a filthy blanket.
He stopped the car, went down and spoke:
"Look here, a hundred-dollar bill for anyone to win a fight between the two. It's really worth it, I want to see blood.
The two of them looked at each other, got up, got suspicious, and when they were well together they filled up the preppy.
He lay on the floor, bleeding and moaning.
He lost the hundred note, the wallet with 250 more, all the documents and, of course, the black car almost new, that only saw it start in a stride and disappear in the long and deserted avenue.

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Chromatika 4-2 Red Blackiland

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In the first duel between Red Blackiland and one of the top teams in the group, Chromatika's home team beat the visitors by 4-2 in a good game at the Capitalizt Dome. Schwartz opened the scoring for the away team, while Andísori, Antonio and Rien scored for the home side. Carmona scored for Red Blackiland's team again. Parker's substitutions had an effect and were key to Chromatika's victory.
Still unbeaten hosting games in the Capitalizt Dome, Chromatika that received a strong opponent and saw a very qualified Red Blackiland that did not subject itself to be dominated by the owners of the house. The away team is going up. In turn, Chromatika also played openly, but avoiding giving up many spaces for the dangerous attack formed by Carmona, Schwartz and Beckenstander.
The game was good and well disputed. One goal was missing. And it could have come out in the first 10 minutes if the referee signaled two penalties (one on Carmona for Red Blackiland and one on Montague de Chromatika). The attempt came out in the 27th minute with Schwartz, who took advantage of the pitch and in legal position hit hard to open the board.
For the second time, Red Blackiland returned without Schwartz returning from injury and Chromatika came with Dragana. The change of the technician Parker did right of face. Dragana made a good pivotal role for Andísori to tie the game in the fourth minute of the second half. Equality on the scoreboard made the game even better. The two squads played with great intensity. Another goal would ignite the duel. The crowd asked and Parker answered.
Sybill entered and soon in the first pitch on the pitch he turned the game to Chromatika in the 28th minute of the second half. The upset animated the local team, bringing the match in their favor, unbalancing the defensive lines of Red Blackiland. One of these defensive errors resulted in a dangerous foul. Antonio charged with category and extended to the 32 of the second time. And the emotions went until the final whistle.
Carmona made the visitors' second goal in the 44th minute and Rien closed the lead to 47 in the second half after another good assist by Dragana. Peter Valbuena's team is parked in 4th place, considered horrible for Red Blackiland. Chromatika has kept the lead. In the next round, Red Blackiland will travel once again, now to face the Lymantatia team. Chromatika will also come out of their domains, now to face the EEC team.

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The Justified Means - Storyline and Guide

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The Justified Means - Be a little warrior fighting against a titan!

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Mission 2 - Climb the Gambling

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Climb the Gambling is the second storyline mission in The Justified Means. Federico must find Luiz Soon-Mi, a drunken O.I.M sleeper asset, in order to to gain information on Manuel Sánchez. Manuela takes Federico to Luiz Soon-Mi's residence, but Luiz is not there. A TV is on and shortly leader Taamir announces "People of Dakersh and its glorious society, it's the speaker for your rights, Taamir al-Mahdi. Today, I have chosen to shut down the den of foreign decadence known as Dakersh Al-Shaabab Casino.
Fernanda Koo-win (she works for the O.I.M in Guayabal, providing them with valuable information about the government's and criminal faction activities in Dakersh, she started posing as the Luiz' girlfriend, to take information on Taamir.) appears behind Manuela, pointing a gun at her, resulting in Federico pointing his gun at her. Shortly after introducing themselves, Fernanda tells them that Luiz is at Al-Shaabab Casino, which means he is probably in danger now. Fernanda takes Federico there on her motorcycle and Manuela goes back on the helicopter. Fernanda drops Federico off near the casino and tells him to hurry and explains that if the Dakersh government and forces catches Luiz, she's probably going to be the next one to be hunted for. She leaves in a rush, calling Federico a ''ghost''.

Reaching in the casino

There are soldiers in front of the building. Kill them all. You'll see in the place a officer from a demolition team as well. He'll throw explosives at you so keep a distance from him. You can kill him by shooting or using the grappling hook against the officer to one of the cars available and ride it till he dies. But make sure that you are quite far away from him , because immediately after you kill him some grenades fall off from his belt and explodes. Afterwards, Manuela informs you that soldiers have planted breaching charges to get to Luiz Soon-Mi and that you must use the grappling hook your way up. If you are new to the game and don't know how to climb up the building check your data menu. Once you reach up, there are soldiers guarding the bombs. On both the towers, guards are present (6 near each bomb). There are also three ammo crates (one in each tower) containing rifles, SMGs and few explosives, move around near the bombs and you'll find them.
Once you have killed all the guards and disarmed the bombs, Manuela informs you that the Dakersh Army have sent helicopters to kill Luiz Soon-Mi . Get rid of them. One way to do this is to, you can use the miniguns to shoot down them or just use the grappling hook to hijack the vehicle. If you shot the first helicopter fast with your weapon, the second helicopter won't show up. After taking the helicopters down, a cut scene appears where the military breaks into Luiz's location and start a shoot-out with him. Luiz is in the corridor that connects the towers. Manuela asks you to save Luiz by getting inside the sky way. You can get in through an open roof window.

Fight the pursuers

Once in,there will be a cut-scene where Federico tells Luiz he's here to help him, in exchange for information on Manuel Sanchéz. Federico kills the soldiers and uses the parachute to get out of the place from the window, followed by Luiz. They land near Luiz's car, at this point the player has control of Federico again. You'll be instructed to use the grappling hook two times, making it hit a tractor, to get back it to the road. Get on the roof of Luiz's car, stay in the stunt position at the top, then Luiz will drive back to his house and you'll have to protect the car from any followers. Try not to waste your ammunition on the engine part of the pursuers cars. Shoot at the tires instead causing their cars to flip over.
Once arriving back at Luiz residence, there will be another cut-scene. Luiz offers to download information onto Federico's personal digital assistant, to help him on his mission and also provides beacons to access the black market dealer. He also downloads the information about the factions of the islands, Dakersh and Paymina.

[Tinhampton]

Jim Small was not exactly the smallest, or the most famous, of the editors to have passed through the Tinhampton Herald's doors when he was sworn in as the Interim Editor in the morning. However, with his tenure set to end in two months (unless he stood in the Editor Elections, originally meant to be held in 2019 but pushed forward to recognise the death of Peter Friedman), he was keen to enforce his style of good old-fashioned tabloidism on the Herald, urging correspondents to do so in their work. And therefore, in lieu of "TINHAMPTON RECORDS BIGGEST-EVER WIN", for the article put out for Tinhampton's 5-1 stomping of the Andromeda Archipelago, there was this:

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THE ANDROMEDA ARCHIPELAGO 1-5 TINHAMPTON: GOD IS A TINHAMPTONIAN

Our boys (and girls) abroad annihilate Andromeda Archipelagoans with four goals in last twenty minutes

[Port Christopher]

During the Chiata match, the Republic of Port Christopher

It was much better. It was the performance that Jim Reid needed, and at exactly the right time. Group Seven was wide open, he knew that anything other than a win at home to Chiata was going to make qualification a massive uphill struggle. Port Christopher just didn't do anything straightforward it seemed, and the defeat in Jeckland had proven that. However, they had to believe that making it to the World Cup finals was a real possibility.

There had been the obvious issue of fatigue, and trying to iron out the teething problems with the venue hadn’t helped help. Playing at the Jim Reid Stadium, in this kind of heat, seemed to be causing as many difficulties for Port Christopher's players as it had for their opponents thus far. With the majority of them used to a far more professional set up, this was certainly a bit of a culture shock. There were two small stands (one for the visitors), but both goal-post-ends were wide open looking straight out to see, from the narrow peninsula.

Jim glanced at his watch once more. Still eleven minutes to go, and it was going to feel more like half an hour. One nil was a precarious lead to defend, but he knew if his players were good at one thing, it was parking the bus. Only Tony Uist still lurked on the halfway line, as the rest of the Christopheran players sat tight behind the ball. The Chiatans were going to be getting frustrated; that was a very good thing. Jeremy Brodie's players had probably sensed that they might have been able to get a result in this one, given Port Christopher's faltering start, but Tim Maitfield's goal on the stroke of half time had slammed the door hard in their faces.

The Polaris skipper was on some form right now, and it seemed that both club and country were reaping the benefits. The small home crowd had been on their feet as the 31-year-old sidestepped Robert Fultom, before releasing his right footed drive. Deigo Bandos had done well to find the player in space on the left wing, before his teammate finished past John Porter, for the side's first goal of the tournament.

Jim looked at his watch again before cursing loudly, it had only been thirty seconds since he last checked. It seemed as if the second hand was actually stopping far a nap between ticks. He shifted his glance towards the bench: it was slim pickings as usual. Sticking out like a sore thumb however, both metaphorically and physically, was the rangy figure of Tom Nazario-Silva. The arsehole wasn't even watching the game, as he chewed nonchalantly on the zipper of his tracksuit.

"If I give you a way back into this side, I need 100% from you. Got it?"

"Yes Gaffer."

"The onus is on you to make amends. Okay Tom?"

"Yes Gaffer."

"You're going to need to prove yourself in training, and be patient. Okay?"

"Yes Gaffer."

It had all sounded too good to be true, and indeed, any promises of improved attitude very quickly evaporated. But what were Jim's options? He couldn't make Port Christopher any better without players, he was going to have to find a way to manage the young man. Last cycle had been a fairytale, and they were now faced with the harsh reality, that they were not as good as their rankings suggested.

'Okay Tom...' The Pirates defender wasn't even listening to him. What the fuck! Jim noticed he actually had his phone out, conceeling it in his lap.

'TOMAS!' That got his attention. 'Get kitted up. You're going on. And put that bloody phone away before I ram it up your backside.'

The towering player's face reminded Jim of his kids' when he dragged them out of bed on a school day. All the same though, he did as he was told, and actually looked like he wanted to get on the pitch. That was a start.

'Okay Gaffer.' Tom was the only player that still called Jim "Gaffer" as opposed to "Jim" - a reminder of the raw divisions.

'Ye're alright Tom.' Jim placed a hand on his shoulder, a peace offering. 'I'm going to stick you in, in the place of James, just in front of the back four.' He pointed as if it needed illustration. 'Just hit them hard, and try to run down the clock. If you need to pick up a yellow, make sure it's outside the box though, eh?'

Tom smiled for the first time since he had reunited with his estranged teammates. 'It's what I do.' He answered with unwavering confidence. Having seen the player in action many times, Jim had absolutely no doubt that he would do exactly just that. All the same he was nervous though: The last time Tom had been on the pitch, his sending off had led to the team's implosion. Jim had to pray that history wasn't about to repeat itself.

[Veldgouwen]

”It’s impossible. Of course it is impossible. But that’s exactly what challenges.”

It was not improbable that quite a few television watchers, who had barely made it through the snoozefest which had been the home confrontation with Nagore, had skipped the fixture with Eura for a more entertaining evening activity. What those had forgotten was the lack of capacity of Veldgouwen to up their game when forced to dominate, which contrasted nicely with their tendency to behave like a Jack Russell Terrier against opponents who are twice or more their size. And when it came to size, talent and probably any other measurable metric, the Rushmori powerhouse had the upper hand, the perfect set-up for an excellent night of football.

”You get a punch in the face, or two but that makes you stronger.”

The squad from Valkeniers delivered with a performance that often lacked in technical skill, but made up for it when it came to perseverance. After only a few minutes, the home crowd had been allowed their first treat when Deferme failed to defuse a quick counterattack, leaving Oberink stranded in no-mans-land and most closed the books when before the mark hit fifteen minutes, a corner kick got headed past the flailing arms of the goalkeeper. Being two in the green seemed to be quite enough for the favorites to lay low on their minnow challengers.

”When your face is in blood, you say, let’s see what is possible, how far I can get.”

It would be an exaggeration to say they simply ‘bounced back’. Like a blade of grass that discovers the storm has stopped, the squad slowly straightened its back just to hold on till the halftime point. It would be exciting to say that Valkeniers had a brilliant speech left in his back pocket, where values like camaraderie and resilience inspired the formation to unexpected things. Rather that than, as happened in fact, he simply instructed them to keep the field a bit tighter and aim for quick attacks through the heart as they were all already incredibly wasted from running behind the superior passing from the Eurans. Eu ran? They ran, indeed.

”And then, you give a jab yourself and you discover, hey, I can play this game as well!”

Probably, this is an all too familiar tale but, the crude truth is that no one else on the side is capable of not just matching, but surprisingly overtaking a formation of this level. Sure, Van Baekel has a mean free kick and the volume from Decubber should lure scouts from more robust competitions to the Ship sooner or later. But only Gert Stalhof, the fragile genius who spends his daily job in the shirt of a small club like Eendracht Rankelsven, is the only who holds the key against defenders who spend their time competing against the stars from the Champions’ and World Cup. The moves were nothing rare in itself, controlling, rushing, turning and passing, but the execution had the touch of a master piece. All Masschelin had to do was caress the leather.

”And you know what? You don’t only find out you can. You find out you like it as well.”

It is easy to say it were the best twenty minutes Veldgouwen ever played, if you’ve hardly got thirty confrontations at the international level, the margins of comparison get smaller. But Veldgouwen fought and battled, refused to lay down and equalized via an unorthodox goal from Troch. And then… They shuddered. Feared. Suddenly, the prospect of beating Eura became too realistic, as if they looked down halfway the corridor bridge. They discovered at which heights they were playing, realized they were not ready to so and… fell. Kris Campbell struck with power and scored with an amazing rocket in the corner pocket.

”And it was fun, I guess. It was educating. An extra point would be better but… That’s what you get against Eura. If you’re a little bit clever, you know in advance: it’s impossible.”

[Taeshan]

The Purple Knights for the fifth time in the history matched up against an almost infamous nation in Krytenia. For the second time ever the two played in a matchup at the Altantea Coliseum. The only previous meeting in Taeshan was a 1-1 tie a long time ago, and if the Purple Knights had any wish to get a tie in this matchup they had to improve immensely on the results of their first two games. Red Blackiland was not as big as Krytenia at the moment, and the EEC was hardly a warm up for the second best team. The good news was after the match the Purple Knights would have only a single top side left on their schedule, whilst also seeing 4 teams they had a higher chance of beating.

It was another cool day in Taeshan and the visiting Krytenians were noticeably annoyed by the fact that Taeshan year round is almost at a freezing weather. The team in the light blue kits were noticeably all wearing long sleeve jerseys or wearing various types of under jersey apparel while the home side in Purple had mostly short sleeves with the occasional under jersey garment. It was quite an early glimpse at the psyche of both sides watching the warm ups as the Krytenians seemed more worried about not freezing to death while the home side seemed more worried about getting ready to play the game in front of them.

Rumors abounded before the game that many of the Taeshan Premier League sides had sent scouts to look at players on the Krytenian team and perhaps some of the currently foreign based Taeshani's. Most notably Mierton was rumored to be at the front of the pack of sides looking to get the young forward Sebastian McAllister who would not start the game but could see the field at some point. Other rumors were hard to substantiate, but nonetheless a whole section of the north end had known Scouts sitting in it to get a chance to see all the players throughout the qualifiers.

The game began not to much differently than the most recent affair for the Knights with a rather boring first 30 minutes. The Knights eventually were able to score with Jon Hutch, in for the still injured but possibly available Miles Snavely, finding Landon van Neymar who scored the first non dead ball goal of the season for the Purple Knights. The home side had an early lead, but before halftime it would evaporate as the visitors were able to launch a beautiful attack that eventually led to a tying goal from Charlie Sammels the 19 year old forward for the Krytenia side.

The second half was a rushed affair with both sides trying to get the full points on the day, and eventually the away side made the whole stadium groan with discomfort as Marco Escobar seemed to gain a second gear for yet another time on the day and slotted a lead giving goal past the Taeshani keeper. In the late minutes Miles Snavely came in to replace Jon Hutch, after both Petersheim brothers also came to the field. Eventually the Taeshani current high goalscorer was able to ingnite a fire in the Taeshani faithful by putting a goal past the outstretched Krytenian keeper and keeping the Knights well within reach of the top few teams especially after a first round lost.

[Revolutionary Nordskania]

Julius

Part Two

It was early morning, at Foss Road. Two days after the Nordskanian defeat in Abanhfleft. Once again, Karl Karpekno was not here yet, nor where some of the other members of the staff and most of the players. Only the early birds were out already, getting ready for the team to resume their preparations for the next match, which would be in North Karakosa and would be against Acronius. For all the complaints about their defending, one couldn’t fault the effort of the Nordskanian players. There happened to be a bunch of them that were with the early group of staff at Foss Road, working on fixing the flaws of their games individually before Karl would arrive and have them train as one unit, as if they were in the military. Perhaps it was his own military experience as a conscript in the NDPR that made him prefer to have his team train as a unit, but whatever the case, Karl Karpenko wasn’t big on individual workouts.

Among those at the Foss Road office were Lara Krupin, who always came early and set things up for everyone else, Eros Ivanovic, who always had too many numbers to organize and not enough time, Natalia Kotov, who never quit working on her tactical studies, and of course, Julius Shvets, who was the main man that kept everything together behind the scenes for just about everyone. The players that were there were mostly the usuals; Natasha Grekov, Damir Dragovic-Courtial, and Antonius and Antonia Karpenko. Ante Sindler was there too, running sprints outside while Damir and Natasha practiced shots and shot stopping and the twins worked in the gym to build up their strength.

Today, Julius would spend more time with the players than his fellow staff. He had some problems to solve, problems that he had put off for a couple of weeks, and now, they were popping back up and becoming more than just distractions. It was time for a real solution, and even though Julius wasn’t sure how he liked this solution, because there was an element of risk involved and a chance of a major backfire, there weren’t exactly a ton of options right now. After having breakfast in the lounge room with the other staff members, he left them and went much further down the hall, to one of the rooms that was closest to the pitch and actual training complex. The gym.

The twins were both racing each other on the treadmills, trying to build more muscle so they could compete with the older players on the squad, with Antonius wearing a sweatshirt despite the strenuous workout and Antonia sweating heavily despite wearing a shirt with cut off sleeves. They were chattering back and forth with each other while they ran, but Julius stepped behind them and interrupted. “Antonius, I might have a compromise to the problem you came to me with a couple weeks ago,” he said, getting the attention of the boy. “I can tell you right now that you aren’t going to start now, or even soon. But to make up for that, I can do you a favor in exchange for you keeping your head down and waiting for your turn.”

“Yeah?” asked Antonius. “And what kind of favor would that be?”

“You were complaining because most of the other players are with someone, and you’re single. Well, I have a solution for that, which will help me out, also,” explained Julius. “You see, Natasha Grekov is also looking for someone. She’s also contemplating running off back to Nordskania to fight in the war back home, with the Red Division. I’ve urged her not to do it, and Karl has said that he won’t be granting her leave to do it, but she might do it anyway, and I think that being with someone will convince her to take her safety more seriously instead of running straight into a warzone. But right now, she doesn’t have a ton of friends and her family are the only people that would be seriously worried about her safety. That’s where you come in. If her family and coaches can’t convince Natasha not to run and fight with the volunteers in Nordskania, maybe a lover can, and I know you’re one of the few players right now who has no romantic attachments to anyone.”

Antonius raised an eyebrow, jumping off of the treadmill and wiping the sweat from his forehead and neck. “Um, first of all, you know she’s seven years older than me, right? I turn nineteen soon, but she’s still way older than me. I don’t know if she would be interested. Second, how exactly are you doing a favor to me? By telling me that she’s single? Because anyone that’s observant can see that, easily.”

“You know that she’s single, but do you know what you have to do to impress her?” asked Julius, before reaching into his backpack and taking out a manila file. “I have her scouting report right here. It’s a copy of the one that Energie Masloka produced on her before her final season with them, with some notes added by the international staff. The psychological part of the report may be of interest to you, and I’ve taken the liberty of adding a note or two that will help you out. Typically, we don’t let players read the reports on themselves and their teammates, but I’ll give this to you under the proverbial table if you agree to take the role that’s been given to you: future prospect.”

The boy stared at the folder, wiping his forehead again before reaching for it and taking it. He opened it up, and Julius watched as his eyes scanned the pages. “I’m more talented than any ‘future prospect’,” he complained. “And this says that she’s narcissistic and that she thrives on receiving attention. Remind me why I would want to date a girl like that, again? It’s going to be awkward because I’m a teenager and she’s twenty five, also.”

By now, Antonia had stepped off of the treadmill, standing on her tiptoes to look over the shoulder of her slightly taller twin. “Bro, have you actually looked at her? She’s a smoke show. You can’t expect somebody that looks like that to have a perfect personality… After all, nobody is perfect. You should be happy that you’ve even got a chance with a Grekov. Their family has been the class of the country for longer than we’ve been alive. Besides, I’ve hung out with her before. She’s not as bad as these papers make her sound.”

Antonius sighed, closing the file and looking back to Julius. “I think I deserve better, with my playing time. I think my play with FC Maris B should be good enough to prove to everyone that I’m on this squad for more than my last name. We’ve been shaky as hell in the back, too. Why not let me step into the lineup and prove myself, instead of trying to bribe me into shutting up by setting me up with a girl that I’m not sure I like? I said I wanted a girlfriend, but I don’t know if this will work out well-”

“I didn’t make the decision to put you on the bench, your grandfather did. I’m just the messenger and the one that has to deal with your reaction to it,” Julius sighed. “Look, I would help you with your playing time if I could, but even if I talked with Karl about it, I already know that I’m not changing his mind. He’s all about continuity and chemistry, he wouldn’t make a change in a position as important a central defender while we’re in the middle of a major tournament. I know it’s hard on you, and instead of just telling you to get over it, I’m at least trying to give you some consolation. If you don’t like Natasha, that’s fine, but you’ve never given her a chance, and I think you two might fit well together. She likes attention and you’re more quiet and you prefer to keep to a close circle of friends and avoid the spotlight. Opposites attract, you know.”

“I’ll give her a chance,” said Antonius. “And thanks for not just telling me to wait my turn, like everyone else has. Sometimes I get sick of being told that I have to wait just because I’m eighteen, but… Thanks for helping me out. I guess a beggar can’t be choosy, anyway.”

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The issue of Antonius’ playing time was now solved, and the solution to the problem had a decent chance of fixing Natasha’s problem of wanting to run off and fight, too. Antonius was set to ask Natasha on a date with him after the team finished their third qualifying match, against Acronius. Currently, that match was tied 3-3 after an exciting first half that saw the Barons come storming back from being down 1-3 in the last ten minutes of the half. They’d started sloppily, but they were returning to their roots with their recent play, executing the Kurovo Whirl to perfection and reminding their fans of their nearly unbeaten run in the Baptism of Fire.

Using the exceptional speed they had at the wide parts of the midfield, Nordskania stretched the opposition and forced them from an average width to a very wide one, which forced them to choose between defending the wide players and closing down on the midfielders, all of whom did their jobs perfectly when it came to finding the open players down field. The wide midfielders also pushed high up the pitch, allowing them to create many chances for the three forwards through crosses. Those crosses had been the key to their comeback. While down 1-3, Ante Sindler had faked a cut to the inside while standing near the corner flag, and instead curved a cross into the box for the two taller members of the front line, Damir Dragovic-Courtial and Ces Yoshida. Ces had been the one to come down with the ball, but Damir cleared out to the left, and when the defense closed down on Ces, she kicked the ball out to Damir for a very easy finish against a goalkeeper that didn’t know which way would be the right one to dive.

Down 2-3 and in the closing minutes of extra time for the first half, they created another big chance from the wing that resulted in a goal. Sindler went to a nearly identical position, but this time, instead of sending a cross inside, he attacked the fullback and forced him to backpedal, and then passed outside of the box when the rest of the defense closed down on him. The ball landed at the feet of Arkadi Zima, who performed a quick lunge to the left before cutting hard to the right and then using the newfound space to rifle a shot into the box that was actually meant to be knocked in by someone else. That was what happened. Ces Yoshida deflected the ball with her foot, changing the flight of it and sending it into goal. The match was tied at halftime, and the team saved themselves from a verbal beatdown by Karl Karpenko during his halftime talk.

Now, the issue was breaking the deadlock. It was the seventieth minute and they were stilled tied, as Acronius shifted to a low defensive block to withstand the heavy pressure that was coming from Nordskania, as well as keeping a man on Zima at all times to try to take away the link between the three headed monster that was at forward and the playmakers that were in the midfield. When Arkadi was covered up, the ball was dominated by Jakub Danshov, who still wasn’t completely proficient in the role of attacking midfielder. The new FC Maris man was only twenty, after all. “Move the ball quicker!” Julius shouted from the sideline, as Jakub received another pass from Arkadi. “Four seconds or less! Remember the rule! Four seconds or less, preferably less!”

Jakub did take longer than four seconds to get rid of the ball, and lost it after a sliding tackle set up an Acronian counter attack. “Fuck’s sake!” shouted Julius, throwing his arms up in frustration and waving to Jakub. “Find the opening before the ball gets to you, not after! Once they close down, it’s already too late!”

After giving the instructions, he trotted back from the technical area to the bench, where Karl and the rest of the staff were watching and waiting for someone to spark another goal for Nordskania. But that didn’t seem to be happening. Acronius had a three minute stretch of possession where they passed the ball around, and then they crossed inside for a wide open forward who would have scored if it wasn’t for a near impossible save from Josef Grekov that sent the ball straight into the air. When it came down, three players battled for the header and Christian Nadarevic came down with it, trapping it with his chest and then booting it deep to give the defense some time to reorganize themselves.

Nordskania, though, reorganized quicker than the opposition and started a scramble forward when Pyotor Afanasyev recovered the ball on the wing and sent it inside towards Arkadi, who had to spin around to take control of the wild pass before looking down field to find Piotr Vlasenko running into position to chase a through ball. As Vlasenko was nearing the offside line, Arkadi volleyed the ball up and over that line for him, and Piotr chased it and picked up more and more speed as he ran. The fans behind the goal roared as they realized that Piotr now had a one on one breakaway chance, and the staff and players on the bench stood up as they saw that they might have a chance to take the lead. This would come down to how Piotr took the shot, and he took it masterfully.

The keeper stayed on his line and avoided coming out and risking getting juked by the speedy center forward, and so as Piotr approached, he was forced to slow his run just slightly enough to aim a shot. But as he was about to take that shot, he did a slight feint to the right side before planting his right foot hard into the ground as his weight leaned to the opposite side. He then exploded out of that stance and kicked the ball one step ahead of him with his right foot, taking advantage of the keeper’s indecision to finish with his left foot from close range. The placement of the shot had been surprising and the pre shot sequence had made it impossible to tell which direction the shot was going towards, and now, it was a goal.

“That’s my boy! That’s my fucking boy!” shouted Julius, running back into the technical area as the crowd went wild and Piotr ran to the corner and kicked the flag in celebration. The score was 4-3, in the seventy sixth minute. They would get another goal to send their total for the day to five, with Ante Sindler curling a free kick into the back of the net in extra time. Acronius was a tough opponent, but Nordskania had managed to defeat them with four straight goals since going down 3-1. And they had proved that they could play with and beat anyone, especially at home. If they could iron out some of their other distractions and off the pitch problems, they were dark horse contenders as much as anyone was.

[Nephara]

Move aside the pretenders. This was a big match right here.
Time for the big players, as well. Raquel Naeher was proud to consider herself - and to be considered - one of them.
Her career hadn't always had its upward momentum. In fact, in her teenage years, it almost ended before it began. It was on her, really. A lot on her plate, figuratively speaking - literally, as well. Weight had been a problem, smoking another, and skipping training was the final nail in the coffin that saw her sacked from Maximum City's academy at 15. She'd deserved it, too. But she didn't regret it. That failure just made her all the more eager to succeed in the future.
She'd caught the eye on trial for the Rovers, disavowed her past lack of professionalism, buckled down and got to work. Before she knew it, she was being capped at youth level...
Still, the whispers followed her. She knew she had weaknesses. She was a sprinter, not a sustained runner, and her genepool had seen fit to give her a short, sturdy and impressively curvaceous frame. And an unhelpful metabolism. She knew ruefully she was going to be one of those footballers who just fucking ballooned months after retirement.
Even now she didn't really look particularly athletic. In fact, with the intricate headband of some kind of... beadsy material, she looked like a folk singer. One who should be plucking a violin.
But with the ball at her feet...
Both of them, too. She prided herself on that. Even when she was playing career roulette with kebabs, booze and various smoked substances, she'd been great with her feet. It was the only thing that had saved her. She was bright and had a surprising change of pace, but at the end of the day she had a scrappy street footballer's instincts married to a technician's drilling, and it was what had dragged her over the line - to the Rovers' first team, then to a big contract in Osarius (she'd been advised by Franzi Toreador, a fringe player jostling for her position, to sign it) and now here, where she might only have been wearing the number 16 but the left midfield position was definitely hers for the taking.
She'd done just fine against the Republicans, essentially having free reign down the left. She'd been outpaced by Tadeo and had a quiet match from a guy who looked like he was fresh off doing a line, but did manage to get in a tidy cross that Amokachi hammered home for the vital opener. She'd left the Nordernian rightback, Freytag, in her dust - and after a mazy run to cut across their defensive unit, had thumped the ball into the ceiling of the net to break a nervewracking deadlock. It had been the 65th minute - Nordernious, and their awful manager Theriault, had been as disciplined in defence as they were totally ineffectual going forward.
She was a microcosm of this new Nepharim side, she reflected as she waited in the tunnel. Eleven mongrels. Amokachi had been homeless for a time as an apprentice. Szalai was legally illiterate when he'd made his first cap. Now he was on track for his hundredth. Leona Rafford - here thanks to Westmead pulling up in training - came to attention after invading a pitch, didn't talk much about her past and what she did talk about sounded anything but happy. They were all working-class, at the very least. If you were poor, Nephara would take care of you, it would give you a platform to build upon. You had a fair chance to work your way up. Universal basic income was on the table, and a key Pro Dem campaign promise.
But if you wanted a chance to burst your way out of the gates and truly make a name for yourself? Football was that chance.
This was her chance.
She looked across in the tunnel at her marker. A 3-4-3 was an interesting tactical challenge - the right-sided centre-half, Hadzic (an Apoxian by birth, apparently), was in a good position to stop her from cutting inside but she had to put pressure on the right wingback, Afanasyev, as well. She didn't envy her defence the task ahead. If this one slipped out of their control, well, it could get nasty.
But all she needed to focus on was her job. Do that, she figured, and the rest would take care of itself.
They walked out into the light.

[Natanians and Nosts]

-And it's over,Anthor 3,Natanians and Nosts 2.Mihai Márcus Johannsson,what could our team have done to win the game,wich are your thoughts about the game?
-Carolus,I think that what was missing was focus.
-That's yourn opinion?
-Yes.They should pay more attention to the game.I'm not saying they don't pay attention lah!But they must train focus.
-And do you think that the chosen 23 should be others,or the coach did the best option.
-That's a rather subjective thing.I think he chose a good team,but some palyers could easily be subsituted by be...
-I'm sorry Mihai,but Márcus Cáius Ioanescu is interviewing Ion Victor North.
-Hi Ion,do you think we could have won this game?
-Yes,Márcus.We missed some crucial opportunities in the last four minutes,and you know the rule:the one who does not score,suffers.
-Are you confident fo the next game?
-Yes.We must be confident,and if God permits,we can win the next game.I have to go.Good bye!
-Good bye...Hey come here,a fast one,please.
-Okay.O.K.
-Good nite Natan Nínnio Gonçalo.
-Good nite Márcus Cáius Ioanescu.
-What are your thoughts over our team results.
- I think that we could do better,boot we are ge'ing closer to winning the games,boot well it is the will of God and we'll joost win when He wants oos to!
-Last question,I know you must go to the changing room.Do you think we can win the next one?
-I hope so,but it's not joost our team,we moost respect the other team as well.
-Thanks.Mihai.Carolus.It's with you now.
-And this was Márcus Cáius Ioanescu!We lost the game,our goals scored by Ion Cáius Ademélsson,31 first period,and Logan North,23,second period,Anthor's goals were scored by Jason Rigsby,20 first period,Nicholas Stark,21 second period,and the last one by Jason Rygsby,again at the 43rd minute of the second period. Mihai,It was great to be with you this night covering this game of our team,and unfortunately we lost.
-It was great to be here Carolus.It's always a pleasure to cover our great team.
-Something to say to the supporters?
-Well.We just have to be patient wah.Because one day we will win a game and even qualify to the World Cup,hor.
-Yes.So now you stay with our NewsCast!

[Gregoryisgodistan]

Olastor 0–2 Gregoryisgodistan

"Good evening, ladies, gentlemen, and slaves. We're coming to you live today from the Land of Olastor, home of the people of Olastor. And we've got quite a dandy for you as this World Cup Qualifier between Gregoryisgodistan and Olastor gets underway. But first, it's time for the national anthems, beginning with Gregoryisgodistan. And the whole team will join in with the instrumental recording.

You are our God, you are our Lord
Lord Almighty Gregory
You kill the heathens by the sword
Lord Almighty Gregory
We worship you unto the core
We will love you forevermore
You kill the fools in holy war
Lord Almighty Gregory

Hark to the Lord and his appeal
Lord Almighty Gregory
We worship you with all our zeal
Lord Almighty Gregory
You are our God, you do reveal
Before you, we pray and kneel
You stab the heathens in the heel
Lord Almighty Gregory

You are our God, in you we trust
Lord Almighty Gregory
Your holy sword shall never rust
Lord Almighty Gregory
You turn Hicanans all to dust
You are kind and always just
Worship you, we must! We must!
Lord Almighty Gregory

You give us prune juice and free gruel
Lord Almighty Gregory
Those who don’t love you are all fools
Lord Almighty Gregory
You’re always generous, not cruel
You kill Queen Margaret in a duel
You are our God and you do rule
Lord Almighty Gregory

You lead our country brave and strong
Lord Almighty Gregory
We bow and praise you all day long
Lord Almighty Gregory
You’re always right, you’re never wrong
And so we sing our favorite song
And if you love him, sing along
Lord Almighty Gregory

You shoot the heathens in the head
Lord Almighty Gregory
And pretty soon they’ll all be dead
Lord Almighty Gregory
We worship you from dawn till bed
And raise our flag, gold, black and red
With gruel and prune juice we are fed
Lord Almighty Gregory

We praise you and we worship you
Lord Almighty Gregory
To you we all remain so true
Lord Almighty Gregory
The Free Republics have no clue
That to you, all praise is due
And you never take a poo
Lord Almighty Gregory

You will not yield to heathen clowns
Lord Almighty Gregory
You will destroy Queen Margaret's crown
Lord Almighty Gregory
All our enemies go down
From Apox to San Pedro town
And Llamaland will wear a frown
Lord Almighty Gregory

Sound the trumpet, play the drum
Lord Almighty Gregory
Those who don’t praise you are so dumb
Lord Almighty Gregory
The guns we’ll blast, the harps we’ll strum
Hurrah! We’ll kill the heathen scum!
They’ll die! They’ll burn! We’ll come! We’ll come!
Lord Almighty Gregory

"Such a brave performance from the Gregoryisgodistanis! They only played one verse, but our heroes kept singing until the end, fighting for what's right! And how sweet, they've got a little girl singing the Olastor national anthem. Let's listen in and most certainly not dub a fake version over it."

A man's voice starts singing on Gregoryisgodistani television, clearly not belonging to a little girl.

Olastor is the greatest country in the world
Because we sing songs about molesting little girls
We like stealing llamas from the petting zoo
We like sex with goats, and platypi too
We will tweet about this and how we like to sue
But guess what, you are dead, who cares about you?
Olastor, Olastor, Yadda Yadda Yadda
Nobody cares, we are all Bad Papas!"

"Thank you person who was so obviously that little girl and clearly not dubbed. Now, it's time for the match.

...

"8th minute, and it's a free kick for Gregoryisgodistan from about 30 yards out, Guy Who Cleans Up Behind The Elephant at the Circus P0120AZNNAU swings it into the box, Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy is there, but Dax Poole gets just high enough to head it over, it will be a corner kick. Guy Who Cleans Up Behind The Elephant at the Circus P0120AZNNAU will take that as well, it's a good one, but tremendous job by Moses-Pollard to punch it away. But Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo is there! HE SHOOTS! OH, IT'S OFF THE CROSSBAR AND FINALLY KNOCKED OUT OF THERE! What a chance that was for the Foot Slaves, but it goes by the wayside and it's still scoreless.

...

"21st minute, another free kick for Gregoryisgodistan, who is dominating this game so far. It's just outside the box, and Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo will take it. OH, HE HIT THE CROSSBAR AGAIN! OH MY GOD, IT HITS OFF THE GOALKEEPER'S BUTT AND GOES IN THE GOAL! HOW INCREDIBLY EMBARRASSING! It's a butt goal, and that will be an own goal for Deverel Moses-Pollard. I don't know if they're giving out an anti-Award for Worst Play of the Tournament, but that's definitely up there. It bounced off the crossbar, off the goalie's butt, and in the net. The Foot Slaves can't believe their luck, and neither can I. It's 1-0 Gregoryisgodistan.

...

"30th minute, finally Olastor has a chance, as it's warren bringing it up the flank. He centers to O'Grady but History Teacher CZDE9745 steps in front and cuts it off. He sends it all the way down, Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Death to San Jose Guayabal is there, GOAL! GOAL! Oh, he was offside. And yes, looking at the replay, even I admit he was offsides, by a good 30 feet at that. There's a reason he was so wide open. And sure, some may say the offside took away the goal, but he never would have scored the goal if he weren't offside, so that's a stupid thing to say, and if you say it, you are a total and utter idiot, much like Dumpy O'Rumpy. Which reminds us, watch the Slaves R Us Leaders Race at halftime of every home game, featuring Lord Almighty Gregory, Dumpy O'Rumpy, Reino Kulseth, Shop Owner, and King Petrus. Or rather, giant costumed versions of them with humongous heads. There's always a twist. Slaves R Us, for all your slave-buying needs.

"38th minute, here comes Ward, she's streaking, oh and Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy takes her down from behind in the box! That will surely be a penalty! It is! The Gregoryisgodistani fans traveling here are furious and are throwing rocks and human solid waste at the officials, chanting "DEATH TO THE REFS! DEATH TO THE REFS!" But Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy isn't disputing the penalty call, though let's listen in to the Enemy Crusher Cam to hear what he is saying."

"All right, man, that's a penalty, but don't even think of giving me a red card unless you want to be CRUSHED TO DEATH, YOU INFIDEL!!!!!"

"How about a yellow card?"

"FINE! YOU WILL BE SPARED FOR NOW!"

"And out comes the yellow card for Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy. Ward will take the penalty herself as the Gregoryisgodistanis behind the goal try to distract her with flares and more stuff being thrown at the goal line official behind the goal even though he wasn't even involved. Ward steps up, IT'S OVER THE BAR! STILL 1-0!

...

"And there's the halftime whistle, still 1-0 in favor of the Foot Slaves.

...

"55th minute, and it's a corner for Gregoryisgodistan. Guy Who Cleans Up Behind The Elephant at the Circus P0120AZNNAU sends it into the box, Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy gets a head on it, keeper dives, IT HITS THE POST! But Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Death to San Jose Guayabal is there to send the rebound in as the keeper was still on the ground! GOOOOOOOOAAAAL GREGORYISGODISTAN! IT'S 2-0!

"And now Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Death to San Jose Guayabal is celebrating as a fan behind the goal hands him a flag of San Jose Guayabal and a flamethrower, and he's setting the Guayabalense flag on fire and handing it back to the fan to hold. A good showing of visiting Gregoryisgodistani fans today, likely received free travel in exchange for making a nuisance. We do that a lot. So the Guayabalense flag will burn, and in the meantime, it's 2-0.

...

"69th minute, and it's a free kick for Olastor, Clements, who just came on as a sub, to take it from about 28 yards out. Towards goal, and deflected over by Prune Farmer 3818F, that's the first shot on goal all game for Olastor, and the only shot period other than the penalty kick. This Gregoryisgodistani back line locking them down today, outstanding. Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy especially.

"So it will be a corner for Olastor, taken by Hood, and Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy heads it clear. History Teacher CZDE9745 looking to counter now, he's running upfield, now dishes it off to Prune Farmer 913881 streaking up the right flank. He'll cross it for Guy Who Cleans Up Behind The Elephant at the Circus P0120AZNNAU, and Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo is there but collides with Moses-Pollard, the ball rolls into the net as they both fall to the turf, but what's the call? They're going to call a foul on Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo and award a free kick to Olastor, but pleas from the crowd to give Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Xylocrap Notatypo a booking or sending off are not given - it was mistimed rather than reckless, the referee says.

...

"81st minute, corner kick Gregoryisgodistan, taken by the substitute Slave Beater SUAXMC91. He'll send it in, but smothered immediately by Moses-Pollard. He hoofs it upfield, oh, now it hits Salt in the butt as he runs upfield, but fortunately this time Moses-Pollard will dive on it. Wait a minute. You can't do that. She held the ball, kicked it, it didn't touch an opposing player, and she held it again. But the referee doesn't give the indirect free kick, that's a bad call, and it probably would have been 3-0 had it been given. Anyway, Moses-Pollard will send it upfield, and this time she gets it away cleanly. What is it with balls deflecting off people's butts in the penalty area today? We saw the butt goal earlier, and we almost saw another one just now, and it should have led to a probable goal regardless, but the referees blew the call. Shame on them, but it's 2-0 so no real argument from the Foot Slaves. Plus some of them probably don't know the rule either; it's quite obscure.

...

"And there's the final whistle! FOOT SLAVES WIN 2-0! AND NOW THEY'RE GATHERING ROUND AND SINGING THE VICTORY SONG, "GO SLAVES GO!" Let's listen in."

World Cup time is underway
Well you better get ready for a brand new day
Hey Cap District, what do you say?
Slaves are gonna win today

We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today

They got the crushing, they got the scoop
To be the best in the World Cup group
Well this is the year and the Slaves are real
So come on down to the soccer field


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today

Slaves are best in Esportiva
You can watch it all on Sports TV-uh
So stamp your feet and clap your hands
Because the Foot Slaves have the greatest fans


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today


We’re singing
Go Slaves, Go
Go Slaves, Go
Hey Cap District what do you say?
The Slaves are gonna win today

"And indeed the Foot Slaves have won today, which makes me wonder why they wait to sing "Slaves Are Gonna Win Today" until after they've already won. Well, I suppose it makes sense in some parallel Universe. That's all for tonight. Catch you tomorrow night!"

[Kalumba]

OTLWTL

Two wins, and a spanking, what can you say? Well I suppose you can say nice job that we're whacking in the goals, and you really have to admire the fact that players from every position are chipping in with their fair share of goals. For years I have maintained that the goalkeeper doesn't contribute nearly enough in terms of attacking impetus and Ulusu Mtanda has clearly taken my words to heart, slamming home a beautiful 90 yard effort to seal our opening win.

I think the only real talking point is the insulting portrayal of our beloved nation in the foreign media. It is a disgraceful insult never to be tolerated to suggest that our nation is named after the catchphrase of a television character, and a particularly poor one at that. It is also blatantly false. Royston Vasey, the main character of the shite TV "drama" 'East Street Farm', 's catchphrase is not "Aye Kalumba" as claimed but "Oi Columba!". As anyone knows that is what he shouts when the local lion, Columba, steals yet another of his prize kudu.

Kalumba of course derives it's name from the Uhali word "maKalumba", meaning home. The nation was founded in 1890 and when the first colonists arrived and made contact with the tribe they heard the word often, and due to the pronounciation of the Uhali language mistook the last part as being a seperate word and the name of the land. Even after independence the name has stuck as it holds meaning close to the heart of all Kalumbans, this is our home of which we are proud.

This shameful state of affairs cannot be allowed to continue, and I ask all you loyal kudu fans to write to your MPs demanding that parliament calls upon the foreign media to issue an apology, and if that fails then we shall march upon foreign embas... (We've cut him off here because it was definitely becoming actionable, Ed.)

God Bless Kalumba

Mr Spleen

(As you know our dear Mr Spleen has been taking up the role of Pisstake Peg, The Mystic Sleg these last few weeks and thus is even more inebriated than usual. The fact he managed to read enough to ascertain the supposed insult to our countries origin is suprising, but his response was not. We must spend at least half our budget keeping a lid on what he says and we apologies to anyone offended by his views which do not represent the views of OTLWTL, myself, any other member of staff or even the street selling monkies peddling our filthy magazine. Honest. Ed.)

[Chromatika]

By: Jordan Lawless, Chief Correspondent
Previous Sports Corresponsdent, Chromatik City Courier

Lineup against Red Blackiland: Nier; Morningstar - Stef - Colbert (Aart '51) - Ellen; Montague - Liam; Rien - Hellion (Sybill '73)- Antonio (Dragana '49); Andísorí.

Have you heard the news about what Silian Parker is going to do next match?

Has the new Chromatik manager taken success to his head too much, and gone out of his mind? Starting an ALL RESERVE Squad? I mean, sure, the game is against an opponent like EEC, but...

No starters? No bench players? No experience?

A rather bold move to see the mettle of the Chromatik Reserves. Sure, a lot of them have a lot of Chromatik League experience in the past, and they've played with each other against the Starting XI in practice, but...

This is a ploy for Silian to rest his players, that is true. But this could backfire, big time. Why not keep the momentum going for the match against Krytenia? Or keep Mia Ria in goal?

"I think that being named to the Deep Reserves should mean something to our players," reads the statement by Silian, "And it will give us a chance to see if any of them have much potential. This also gives us a chance for our starters to rest, and prepare themselves for the bigger matches ahead."

So, the next starting lineup will be:

Elise; Cameron - Shipp - Lia - Lorenzo; Minke - Buric; Baumgartner - Harbin - Chesser; Victoriane.

Of course, the Starting XI might come off the bench if needed, but this is a gamble that the team is taking. Is it an unnecessary one?

[Amnarei-asud]

Expectations were high. Rightly so. And that's just the way The Hood liked it. An historic four-all draw with the giants of Valladares, in Valladares no less, had raised the expectations of the Asud general public right back up to where they had been after the Baptism win. The defeat against Semerland long forgotten, the crowd were urging their new found heroes on as loudly as they could. At The Rock, that was very loud indeed. Faustii were looking intimidated, and The Hood couldn't say he blamed them.

The return of Abdul-Rahman Saab from his episode of psychosis had galvanised the team, and his face could be seen looking down on the public from giant billboards all over the country, selling just about anything the government chose to force him into posing with. It meant less time training with the rest of the team, but frankly, with Saab's knees, maybe that wasn't such a bad thing. The man was so experienced he could more or less just turn up for the matches if he wanted. He didn't want that, obviously, and even if he had wanted that The Hood and Sato wouldn't have let him, but he really was that far ahead of the rest of the team. Looking back at that performance in the first match against Semerland, The Hood had realised how crucial Saab had become. Perhaps it was just the testosterone and the adrenaline of playing in a final that made sure the team played so well back then against Nordernious, because their Saab-less performance against Semerland was nothing like it. Tepid, weak, limp, and just generally not that interested. Saab's return for the match against Valladares had been a revolution.

Even now, as The Hood looked up from his notebook to briefly survey the events on the field, he could see Saab was in possession of the ball once again. He sprayed a pinpoint pass up the field for one of the attackers to run onto, The Hood couldn't see which from his position behind the tunnel wall, but the reaction of the crowd told him that they'd been close to taking the lead. He wasn't concerned. He'd seen enough matches to know when the inevitable was bound to happen, and besides, there was half an hour left yet. The Fennecs would find a way through before the ninety were up, he was sure of it.

What he was less sure was his conundrum. Saab's rant. There was a vague hint at what The Hood needed to be doing, but he wasn't sure how, or where. Or when. Or even why, to be honest. He had a feeling that things were bigger than he understood, but he needed to get help from somewhere. But where? Zubin Abdulrashid and Aslan Sato had both been there at the time of Saab's 'fit' as well, but both had dismissed the words he'd shouted at them all as some kind of lucid feverish dream. They'd been no help enough times already for The Hood to know to give up trying to consult with them about the occasion. If anything, Abdulrashid looked like he wanted to forget the whole thing as soon as possible.

But then who? There wasn't anyone else he trusted, really. Except maybe Saab. But then, as Saab had no memory of anything from that evening, he'd been no use either.

Even the books in this country had been no use. Not that The Hood had expected to find anything in the local library under "psychotic rants, deciphering (computer science)", but it had been worth a try. Or at least, it would have been had there been a local library to go to. Or books to read. Or any concept of a history beyond the previous eight or nine years.

So instead, The Hood had been facing up to the fact he was on his own. On his own, with a deep sense of foreboding that something bad was going to happen, but that he was informed of it's coming and still utterly helpless. It was almost as if he had a list of directions to a destination, but no idea where the directions assumed he was standing.

If he could only find someone, or something, to tell him where to stand, then maybe he could work out what the rest of the message meant through its context. Maybe he could follow the directions and realise what it was he was supposed to do.

He looked up as a cheer erupted around the stadium. Ghufran El-Amin had scored for the Fennecs and put them ahead. Perhaps the hunt for the first win of qualification was about to end already.

And then beyond the celebrating players he noticed a figure on the other side of the stadium. A figure who was shaking hands with the Sheikh and looking down proudly on Sato and the players. A figure who was also looking around the stadium for The Hood. A figure who persuaded Sato to let The Hood take directorship of the team in the first place. A figure who might just know what was going on around here.

Kerim Al-Tanaka. Chairman of the FAAa.

Perhaps it was time he and The Hood had another meeting...

[Revolutionary Nordskania]

Revolution News
The home of news and pop culture from the island of Nordskania

The Nordskanian Situation, and the Resolution
Article by Todor Delic

TURBAYOV --- Let's talk about Nordskania. Particularly, the state of the island after a brutal war has devastated many of the big cities and has carved the borders up and created entirely new nations. The communist dogs of Pridnestrovia invaded the island with the goal of restoring order, but in the process, they split up those two countries into many more and broke the order that already existed, that had taken decades to form. Previously, the Vestanians, Nordskanians, socialists, and conservatives had been able to live together, and even after the breakaway of the north and the rise of anarchism in the northern part of the country, that order had been maintained and all out war never broke out. Now, it's every faction for themselves, with the Mountain Pact being somewhat united in the top half of the country and the lower half becoming a battleground between the Soviet Republic of Nordskania, Pridnestrovia, and the Vestanian Protection Forces. Let's go over the situation, from the start.

This war has been going on for about a year and a half, and it began when Pridnestrovia announced its invasion of Nordskania to restore order. This was because of the Rose Rebellions, a series of protests and riots held in Ryakova against the Communist Party of the Nordskania Democratic People's Republic that would be effective enough to force Supreme Leader Vasily Zharkov into hiding for a time. Zharkov would intend to return, but would lose control of his country as things descended further into rebellion when the Rose movements captured the inner part of Ryakova and held it as their territory. However, disunity would result in the Rose movements fracturing and breaking apart, and in them burning Ryakova as they fled to the west when the Nordskanian People's Army moved to retake the city. That was when Pridnestrovia declared that the country needed order to be restored.

When the Pridnestrovians landed in the southern part of the country, the borders began to shatter. The Blue Roses, the most extreme of the Rose movements and the right wing part of the factions, retreated to the Red Strip between Northern Nordskanian and NDPR territory, and turned the fortification there into the capital of the newly named city of Orelgrad. Then, using firepower provided by the Maslev Cartel, they would take over the surrounding area including the city of Sopova, declaring themselves the State of Nordskania. Their ideology is officially fascism, while in reality the state could be described as a very populist oligarchy without a formal power structure that extends beyond the highest positions.

At the same time, the southern part of the country and the city of Puloko broke away under the command of Army Marshal Pavel Andriychuk, the highest ranking general in the Nordskanian People's Army. The People's Army took control in Puloko and declared themselves to be the rightful heirs of the country, with Zharkov missing and Ryakova in anarchy. They intended to capture Ryakova as soon as possible, but this plan stalled out because of the Pridnestrovian invasion. The Soviet Republic suffered the first casualties of the invasion, and this communist state has taken the majority of the casualties and has been involved in the majority of the combat because of their coastal location.

The Nordskania Democratic People's Republic, however, wasn't dead. Vas Zharkov would return and retake Ryakova with remnants of the army that were still loyal to him. They would then push southwest and take the surrounding areas that made up the gap between them, the North, and the State of Nordskania, and they would later drop communism to join the Mountain Pact alliance with Anglatia, the Northern Syndicate, and the State of Nordskania. This faction would quickly rise to become very powerful, behind heavy backing from the Empire of Anglatia, including weapons and funds to rebuild their territory with.

Pridnestrovia gained much in the initial part of the invasion, and pushed all the way to the mountains below Sopova before taking over Puloko to the southwest of there, but they wouldn't advance past that line. The Empire of Anglatia stepped in to avoid their investments in the Northern Syndicate from being a waste, and sent equipment and multiple divisions of soldiers to Nordskania to fight, as well as at least a couple divisions of volunteers. The tides of the war changed completely when the Pridnestrovians were pushed back from Sopova by the Blue Army of the State of Nordskania, and they were also smashed on the Ryakova Front by Anglatian volunteers and soldiers under the Nordskanian Armed Forces, the new military of the NDPR. On the Ryakova Front, the Pridnestrovians were pushed south as far as the sea, and on the Sopova front, the Imperial forces pushed them far to the south until their only territory is the coast. The Puloko Front is where most of the resistance is, but now, the southwestern city is surrounded by hostile forces and the skies and seas are mostly Imperial controlled.

The Empire of Anglatia also recently stated in a media release that in addition to having the Underfell Missile Array, which is capable of intercontinental attacks, they have a second such array in Saint Rainier, Patierre. The Patierre Array is both nuclear and intercontinental attacks, just like the Underfell Array, and Emperor Colden of Anglatia has warned Pridnestrovia that any attacks on Anglatian soil will result in nuclear action against Pridnestrovia. Anglatia, which does not recognize international law, has not used nuclear weapons in its history, but did use non-nuclear missiles from the Underfell Array to destroy the rebellious city of Torsjo at the end of the Second Torsjo War.

There is, however, a resolution on the table, which was proposed by the Northern Syndicate. The proposal would carve up the borders again, handing the eastern part of the country to the NDPR, the entire northern peninsula to the Northern clans, the central part of the country to the State of Nordskania, and the former Soviet and Pridnestrovian held lands to the Vestanians, the ethnic minority that descends from the Valerians, just like the Nordskanians. However, the Vestanian people are closer to a Latin people than a Slavic one and speak a language similar to Romanian. Under the Northern Resolution, as the plan is being called, the lands formerly conquered by Pridnestrovia would become the new homeland for the Vestanians, who have dealt massive losses to the Pridnestrovians on the Puloko Front as major players in the Mountain Pact coalition after being abandoned by Pridnestrovia and switching sides to join Anglatia. This proposed state would be called the Republic of Vestania, and would become the only democratic state on the island.

If Pridnestrovia accepts this proposal, they would have to pay heavy reparations to the Northern Syndicate and the State of Nordskania. If they don't accept this proposal, it shouldn't be more than a month before they get pushed into the sea by the combined forces of the Imperial Army, the Northern Army, and the VPF. And in that case, the invasion would be turned on them, as the Imperial fleets set their eyes on Pridnestrovia itself. This solution would work for both sides, and allow our nation to return to rebuilding from the first civil war that we never quite recovered from. But, if Pridnestrovia refuses, victory for Nordskania seems inevitable. The enemy fronts are collapsing left and right under the weight of much better equipment and more advanced tactics, and for the first time since the start of the war, things are looking up in Nordskania.

No matter what happens, the nation will survive. It always does.

[Kitsunia-Deesse]

Borrowing a tiny little bit from that RLStates set-up, hope you won't mind, Audio.

La Déesse stared, confused at her portable console.
The console was a Dream, Gloriax's most remarkable product.
She had been playing her favorite RLStates-themed football game but...
...
Yeah, it was really glitchy.
She had been convinced by one of her guards to play as the team known as Hibernian.

Hibernian started out as a rather poor team from the Scottish Premier League.
A competition borrowing heavily from the Iturributan league as two teams kept the hold of the league while the rest of the teams would only show up to fill in the slots.
The team was only remarkable for their forward, a guy named Riordan who was surprisingly good.
La Déesse did what one would expect, selling the player and rely on mostly weak talent.
She found her first talisman, a new striker named Bowerman.
Bowerman raised hell on the defenses of the Scottish Premier League.
He'd nail goals against Inverness, Killmarknock, St. Johnstone, Aberdeen, Motherwell, Saint Mirren, Hamilton, Dundee United, rivals Hearts and the duopoly Rangers and Celtic.
Other names would follow, names like van der Beeke, Radulovic... many names.
She sold them all and bought better players.

And then, the first glitch.
Aberdeen and Hamilton, the bottom two teams got relegated.
They were replaced by two teams she wasn't familiar with, two RL Sports teams known as Falkirk and Partick Thistle.
The division also increased in size for some reason, another glitch, Raith Rovers and Dunfermline got promoted.
La Déesse was even more confused.
By the time she was playing the fifth season, the entire RL Sports-verse was confusing.
The Bundesliga had turned into a Sunrisian Championship rip-off, the Ligue 1's greatest team was a side called Red Star and both the Premier League and the La Liga watched their more traditional teams lose to names like Sporting Gijón and Aston Villa.
All the while, La Déesse's side was capable of winning the ever so expanding Scottish Premier League and the European Champions' League as well, embarrassing every team that they went on to face.

And then the fifth season came.
No league changes, things seemed to be working normally now.
She noticed weaker teams on the pre-qualifiers, justifiable national champions...

And then that.
She sighed.
RL Sports' Real Football 11 found its' way to the dust bin rather not fun.
She took out another CD from her purse of games and turned the console on.

Skill binding was hard!

[Eastfield Lodge]

The Lodger Online Gazette

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Sport >>> Football >>> World Cup 77

Freak winds gives Eastfield Lodge a nervy finish

Kaisaru Line-up

GK: Yin Ka-Hułi
CB: Samiki Ił-łl
CB: Chibi Sa-kla
RB: Ivan Shen Zinstag
LB: Ushi Ko-So
CM: Totrek Zo-San (<> Hyrin Qo-Wa 74’)
CM: Hîja So-Çua
RM: Wasini Mo-Kwo
LM: Ixonas Rwi-Jy (<> Saksima To-Sal 63’)
CF: Vasuri Fy-Za (<> Salrunami Jai-So 74’)
CF: My Ki-Ko

Eastfield Lodge Line-up

GK: Korbin Harvey
CB: Lucas Bacon
CB: Emely Towers
RB: Abdur Rehman
LB: Hamaad Siddique
DMF: Micella Onatish (<> Amitee Abdalla 84’)
AMF: The Doctor
AMF: Methuselah Wallis-Iqbal
RWF: Georgina Wadimu (<> Ali Asif 84’)
LWF: Tirs Rathun
ST: Tia Drenas (<> Marlon Rowlinson 72’)

Kaisaru 1-2 Eastfield Lodge
Harvey OG (74’); Abdur Rehman (34’), Tia Drenas (56’)

34% - Possession - 66%
1 - Shots - 17
0 - Shots on Target - 9
1 - Corners - 4
17 - Fouls - 5

Location: Unknown Stadium, Unknown Place, Kaisaru
Referee: Joanna Brunet (Nephara)

Eastfield Lodge today navigated a potentially tricky away match against the group’s bottom seed Kaisaru, dominating the match from the first whistle and yet inexplicably only winning by the single goal to make it three wins from three, a rare perfect start for the Eastfielder NT. It was a match that may well be remembered for the freak weather conditions in the undesignated area in which the similarly undesignated stadium was located - it was lucky that the Eastfielder team got there in the first place, having to ask for directions from the entire settlement’s populace, who happened to give their answers as vague cryptic clues. On the pitch, the story was more or less written by the Nepharim referee, Joanna Brunet, whose first decision was inexplicably to let the game should go ahead, despite there being hurricane-force wind gusts in the storm that was raging in the vicinity of the stadium - it was a miracle the players heard the whistle to start the match.

Despite Eastfield Lodge’s historically poor record against bottom seeds in qualifying, the Eastfielder team were clearly the more superior team on the pitch, not giving Kaisaru any time on the ball and pressuring high up the park, keeping the opposition hemmed inside their own half for large periods of the game. When the ball would stay with the players that is - frequent gusts kept blowing the ball over the pitch, and often the players along with it. It took a while for the first clear-cut chance to present itself, as Wadimu’s pace down the right flank saw her clear the full back with ease, and her whipped cross flashed across the six yard box, only for Drenas to just miss the header, mainly because the wind picked up and gave the ball that little bit more speed. The defensive gaps were there though, and soon the Kaisaru keeper had to be called upon to save from Tirs Rathun’s piledriver.

The first controversy of the match came in the 34th minute, as Abdur Rehman was ruthlessly scythed down on the corner of the box by Sa-Kla. He got straight back up and began squaring off with Sa-Kla, enough for the ref to dish him the yellow card. However, when Brunet was pulling out the red to give to Sa-Kla for that leg-breaker tackle, the wing picked up and blew all of the cards, and the notebook, right out of her hand. And instead of using common sense and getting a replacement, and then dishing out justice, Brunet decided to let the game carry on without cards, not even dismissing Sa-Kla as she was about to do. Nonetheless, Wallis-Iqbal stepped up to take the free kick, and played it low, under the jumping wall, for Rehman to run onto and flick over the confused Ka-Hułi to give Eastfield Lodge the lead. The Doctor missed the chance to double the lead however, as his attempted free kick three minutes later pinged up off the crossbar, just dipping too late to beat Ka-Huli.

The second half proceeded in much the same vein as the first ended, with Eastfield Lodge in control. The wind however refused to play ball, and Tia Drenas will be severely annoyed that she couldn’t get on the scoresheet 2 minutes into the half - a perfect ball through from Wallis-Iqbal left Drenas 1-on-1 with the keeper, and she chipped him marvellously, but the wing again picked up in the opposite direction, and the ball managed to roll all the way to the goal line before the wind stopped it, dead on the line, before being cleared by the recovering defenders. A similar fate befell Wallis-Iqbal a few minutes later, as his curling 25-yard shot, destined for the far top corner, was picked up by the wind and began curling the other way, ending up hitting the near post on its way out for a goal kick. Fortunately, the wind was equally playing havoc with Kaisaru - as soon as they tried to clear the ball upfield to start a counter-attack, the ball was caught by the wind and blown in all sorts of directions - Ka-Huli almost conceded an own goal when her goal kick in effect ‘rebounded’, forcing her to punch it over the bar for the corner.

The second goal came shortly before the hour mark, in quite acrimonious circumstances for the hosts as well. Tia Drenas roamed out to the wing, where she received a rather errant cross-field ball from Rehman, beating her full back and then proceeding to the edge of the box, holding off the challenge from Sa-Kla, before chipping the ball into the box for the incoming Tirs Rathun. Yet again however, the wind picked up, blew a water bottle onto the pitch which Kaisaru keeper Ka-Huli tripped over, whilst at the same time diverting Drenas’ cross over the stranded keeper and into the empty net. That goal put Eastfield Lodge 2-0 up and seemingly in cruise control. But only a few minutes later, Kaisaru nearly demonstrated that this was in fact a football match as opposed to a training session, with Kaisaru captain Ki-Ko taking advantage of a lull in the wind to fire a shot just centimetres past the bottom of Harvey’s left-hand post, a shot which he probably wouldn’t have reached had it been on target. It was a warning shot from the opposition, although in the end it became the team’s only registered shot in the entire game.

There was another controversial period, at around the 70 minute mark, where as many as five Kaisaru players could have been sent off, either for a second (or more) potential yellow card fouls or for a straight out red card tackle. Firstly, To-Sal, who had only recently come onto the pitch, managed to first foul Onatish with a late tackle, and then seconds after regaining the ball, was called up again for diving - had referee Joanna Brunet decided to replace her cards and notebook, To-Sal could have walked in less than ten minutes of match time. Fy-Za should also have been sent off after the diving incident, after throwing a punch in the direction of Towers, who had made the challenge on To-Sal. Zo-San could potentially have walked as well, after a very late lunge on Georgina Wadimu on the edge of the box nearly left her injured, and even the captain Ki-Ko would have seen a second yellow for deliberate handball, following a blatant dive in the first half. Lastly, Sa-Kla, who should have been sent off for the foul that led to the opening goal, was involved again as he deliberately elbowed Drenas in the face at a corner kick in the 72nd minute, breaking her nose and forcing her to be substituted off for treatment, with Marlon Rowlinson coming on in her place.

The travelling team’s bad luck continued in the next few minutes, as Harvey scored an extremely unfortunate own goal in the 74th minute; as he was taking a goal kick, a lunchbox carried by the wind hit him square in the face, knocking him over backwards mid-kick. His mis-kick lifted the ball a metre into the air, enough for the strong wind to carry it backwards over the goal line, as Harvey lay on the ground dazed from the incident. Nonetheless, the Eastfield Lodge team remained unfazed in their approach, and tried a new tactic of keeping the ball on the ground, passing it to each other and generally stopping the Kaisaru players from getting a foot in. That tactic enabled the favourites to gain a modicum of control in this chaotic match, and they eventually saw out the remaining 25 minutes of the match (which included the 10 added minutes of stoppage time, one minute of which was due to the 4th official losing control of his board as he lifted it up) to win 2-1 in one of the weirdest matches ever played by an Eastfielder NT.

That result leaves them second in Group 6 after 3 one-goal wins from 3 games, with Brenecia heading the group on goal difference - a GD difference of 1 separating the two sides. Turori and Anglatia follow close behind on 6 points each. Eastfield Lodge’s next opponents will be Juvencus at home, with the visiting side nominally the ninth seeds, but currently in 5th after an excellent display to overturn and upset 5th seeds Tobiasia 3-0 on the road.

---

MD1: Savojarna 2-3 Eastfield Lodge
EFL line-up (4-1-2-3): Harvey - W. Martin, Bell Jnr, Adams, Finn (<> Siddique 65’) - Abdalla, The Doctor, King (<> Saqib 78’) - Asif, Quazin, Drenas (<> Rowlinson 76’)
Goals (Assists): Drenas (18’ - Saqib), The Doctor (38’)

MD2: Eastfield Lodge 2-1 Tobiasia
EFL line-up (4-1-2-3): Harvey - W. Martin, Towers, Rehman, Siddique - Abdalla (<> Onatish 73’), The Doctor, Soria (<> Wallis-Iqbal 82’) - Asif (<> Rathun 69’), Quazin, Drenas
Goals (Assists): Quazin (47’), Drenas (78’ - Quazin)

Line-up for Eastfield Lodge vs Juvencus
Harvey - Towers, Bacon, Rehman, Finn - Abdalla, The Doctor, Lacroix - Asif, Rathun, Rowlinson
Injuries: Tia Drenas - facial injury, will just miss Juvencus match and will have protective facegear on afterwards

[95X]

95X 1, Hicanans in Exile 0

95X
Lineup: Thirtieth (K); Fivethirty, Fivetwelve, Foureleven, Riverforest (D); Camassia, Morrison, Samster, Twoseventeenth (M); Glenn, Scholls (F)
Goals - Scholls :61

With games against Arkan, Gregoryisgodistan and Cosumar still to come, 95X played its bench in this away game.

"I'm pleased with our one-goal win," commented Randy Larch. "The opponent played like they were barely on the field at all, and our bench relished the starts."

---

After the game, Micah Morrison gets a call from an old friend that works at a bus scrapyard.

"How've I been?", he responds to a question, "Well I know you don't follow soccer but I'm on the 95X National Team! Yeah, playing soccer actually worked out for me. You done anything new recently?"

His friend tells him he's set up a paper company so he could buy an old Metro for dirt-cheap, add flexible fins that extend off the back and sides, a fishhead-like front end, paint the whole thing blue, and it's now "the fish bus." He is already licensing use of it to a seafood chain restaurant for use in their advertising.

"That's, uh, interesting," Morrison responds, "wow, look at the time, gotta go! Bye!"

[Brenecia]

It wasn't... what it used to be, anymore. What it was meant to be.
Sasha Bale watched a thoroughly routine victory over Savojarna, the same way she'd watched a thoroughly routine victory over Mattijana and a thoroughly routine (if extremely welcome against a difficult opponent) victory over Turori earlier. Like a chef who knew something was missing from their soup, and was sifting through their spice rack for an answer.
The defence was solid. That was unusual, but in a good way. Mathis Woodgate was still the undisputed goalkeeper, even if the high-class shotstopper's career was starting to resemble more journeyman than miracle man. Scrivener and Bradden were large men who kicked people. Or, in this match, Szubanski and Uffington were doing that. Meanwhile, the straightforward work of going up and attacking down the wings was being done just fine by Hassett and Lovelock. Lovelock, for her part, had the goal - cutting inside past Nurkanen, raking a powerful strike past Jarnstroem. They'd done well too.
And the midfield was solid! Gryphon was... well, she was keeping the team together. It'd been argued she was the best defensive midfielder in the world by impartial sources. Drover and Balliol were fighting over one of the slots ahead of her, Skorupska had the roving number 8 role in the bag. And up front? Trevelyan... well, he'd stalled a little, but Foran was doing alright today, Rankin up front had hit the post and Carroll was... well, Carroll. She'd stepped up mightily recently, once a relative weak link but now a strong point, drifting inside when needed with a left boot that could drop crosses on a 20-cent piece. But when she'd come off, Fallon had come on...
... and it had broken down, a bit. Now they were just running forward at the opponent, and the Savojars were anything but backing down. Already, Woodgate had made a smart save from close range after substitute Hytoenen had found space bursting through the centre of the park. Already, the veteran Mortensson's corners were hitting their marks. Things looked precarious, and their canny opponents refused to open up at the back, either, to let the Patriots get behind them.
So what did they have left? Bale threw Bowditch on. And then Drover, for Balliol. It had the opposite effect. Now they had even more limited runners, and Rankin was suddenly feeding on scraps.
And the issue sunk in, for Bale.
For the past few cycles, Purrington had been an aging, formless shambler in the midfield. But she'd always had a place. Gryphon and Skorupska made up for her being a defensive liability, and the front three had enough pace to trouble any side. But now...
... now that creative edge was gone. Carroll was the closest thing she had, now, the only way she could open up a team that just shut up shop and locked the gates. Little wonder they'd only beaten Turori through Scrivener's header off a, yes, Carroll corner. Mattijana had overextended to chase an equaliser, but Savojarna were cannier than that.
In the end, the Patriots were almost fortunate to go away with the three points. And things were tense afterwards, in the dressing room. They had nine points from three games. But how long could they last like this... ?

[Farfadillis]

Divadland's players were exceptionally slow. Their positioning left a lot to be desired, too. So, naturally, when I scored so many goals, it felt kind of empty. What was the challenge there? When had the last time time I had actually faced any challenges been?

Made my debút aged barely sixteen, touted as the new Dandalleion shortly after. Sold to a Nepharim club, quickly made myself a starter, stayed a starter despite lack of discipline, called up aged, what, eighteen? And now I was a starter at age twenty-two. Becoming the best footballer in the history of the Multiverse felt like an inevitability at that age.

I scored the first goal on a counter. Monrazón just kicked the ball forward knowing I'd get to it faster than anyone else. As a matter of fact, I did. I dribbled three players and chipped it over the goalkeeper. It almost felt boring. The goal may have looked impressive - it was one of the best in my career, actually - but the defenders and the keeper had made it spectacularly easy to execute.

The second goal came off a corner. I just jumped higher than their terrible defenders and headed it in. Their keeper could've saved it. In fact, he really should have. But you couldn't expect competent opposition every matchday when it came to World Cup qualifiers.

The third goal? A penalty. Wínrôuge let me take it since I was on a brace already. Sent the goalkeeper the wrong way. Easy hat-trick by my standards. It felt almost boring.

When half time came, Tíbürçìó barely acknowledged how well I had been doing. He just said "I want another three." I nodded. I would get another three, of course. Probably more if he had just asked.

A couple of minutes into the second half, I dribbled three and sent the ball flying to the upper-corner. No chance in hell for their inept keeper to stop that. That goal did feel like I would've scored it against just about anyone. Not even the best shot-stopper could've stopped that one, and no defender in the world, I felt at the time, could've beat my pace when I dribbled the defenders, dreadful as they were.

The fifth one I scored from afar some twenty or so minutes after. Not a very good goal but, as I said, bad keeper.

I chose to let Tíbürçìó wait for the sixth goal. I intentionally faded out of the game until injury time. After the fourth referee added one minute of injury time, I received a pass from Wínrôuge - truthfully, the only player in that squad I considered my competition - and just turned around and smashed it in from the edge of the box. The ball grazed the post. The shot had been impossible to stop.

I could already imagine the headlines. I was about to no longer be 'the next Dandalleion'. I was going to surpass Dandalleion. And Kâí. And Fôx. And Wínrôuge, too, if he managed to continue playing like he was playing at the time. Stiin Siorrha'Asione was going to be a player like Farfadillis, or maybe even the Multiverse had never seen. I was going to get a transfer to a big team. I was going to set the Multiverse on fire, and tear its fabric apart with my dazzling ability.

Or, at least, so it felt at the time. The bigger they are, the harder they fall.

[Ethane]

---

Match Review

---

Consistency Wins Games

The Red Kites have done it again. Another victory.

The first two games were expected to be victories for Ethane. They were relatively low ranked sides compared to the 4-time world cup qualifier entrants Ethane, and were never expected to pose much of a threat to the backline of the Red Kites. However, Curtis Steeling did express some worry at the state of these games; while the Ethanese players were able to shut down most of their attacks, they struggled up front, only scoring 1 goal each game.

Going into the third game, away against Electrum - the most difficult game the Red Kites had to face this World Cup against the top seeded team at their home - the management were extremely worried that the Red Kites would underperform and find themselves losing by a considerable margin. Facing the top team in a group is never an easy feat, and it always proves to be more difficult when away from home, with the better team also having home advantage on their side.

However, against all expectations, the team from Ethane were able to come out on top and clock up yet another one-nil victory, marking a significant level of consistency, and a successful team style and tactics, which Steeling will hope to keep up for the rest of the qualifiers.

The lineup Steeling had chosen to start the game against Electrum was what he saw as his best starting team, and they proved that. Solid defence combined with a deadly attack when needed proved to be all that was needed against the team from Electrum, who struggled to break through the brick wall which is the Ethanian defence, appearing to not really be fully in the game.

It was in the 61st minute of the game when the Red Kites got the break on goal to score the winner. It was off an attack by the team from Electrum, in which a neat one-two between Klein and Knight had managed to outdo Archie Holmes on the right-back position. This allowed Klein to reach the side of the box and whip in a decent cross, to which Knight had run onto, and was able to reach it with his head, hitting it goal-ways. Brody Church was easily able to sweep the ball out of the air and kick it hard and quickly, propelling it far up the pitch to where Dewayne Boivin was waiting. He was able to control it well, knocking it down by his feet. He then dribbled it past the seemingly paralysed Watkins, who didn't react fast enough to Boivin's manouvres to block him off, leaving Boivin with only Moore and Kara between him and the goal. Unselfish as he is, he saw Mitchell running in across the box, and passed it across goal to him, where he was able to knock it into the corner of the goal, completely avoiding Moore, and sending it past Kara, who was unable to react quick enough to reach the ball. This gave the Red Kites the one goal they needed to win the game, and from that point onwards they sat back a little and shut down any attacks from Electrum, quite successfully.

It's not to say that Electrum didn't pose any threats, as the Knight-Latham pairing up front was a deadly one to face from a challenging team, but they were unable to get the break needed to score. Their closest probably came in the 32nd minute of the game when they managed to get it pass Fear and Campbell, finding themselves with a clear shot on goal, only Church between them and the lead. However, Jake Latham took a little too long in positioning himself for the ideal shot, so that by the time he had taken the shot, Cliff Driscoll had come sweeping in from the left wing and was able to just deflect the ball over the crossbar. If Driscoll hadn't managed to reach the ball, it would have been a goal as it was far beyong the outstretched fingers of the diving Church.

With the most difficult game in the group behind them, and a win at that, the Red Kites will be brimming with confidence about their chances in this group, which they initially assessed as little. However, with the difficult game behind them and the next challenging game not until Damukuni on match day 9 - the last of the first round of fixtures - the team should be able to pick up most, if not all, of the points across the next 5 matches without too many problems.

'75: Hayden Watts
'83: Andrew Biley
'83: Jonathan Harris

---

Lineup vs Cetheque

---

GK: Joe Henderson
LB: Thresa Desantis
CB: Daniel Moore
CB: John Campbell
RB: Archie Holmes
CDM: Alex Brown
LM: Grady Stevens
RM: Branden Veresoto
ST: Thomas Peone
LF: Wilmer Jaurequi
RF: Julian Harrington

---

Schedule and Stats

---

---

Note: statistics do include friendlies.

---

Pre-WCQ Friendly: Qasden 1-0 Ethane @ Royal T.V. Stadium, T.V. City
MD1: Korizland 0-1 Ethane @ Korizland
MD2: Ethane 1-0 Rebuild the Wall @ King Edward IV Stadium, New Sarum
MD3: Electrum 0-1 Ethane @ Centralis Arena
MD4: Ethane vs Cetheque @ King Edward IV Stadium, New Sarum
MD5: The Andromeda Archipelago vs Ethane @ The Andromeda Archipelago
MD6: Ethane vs Tinhampton @ King Edward IV Stadium, New Sarum
MD7: Boring Paradise vs Ethane @ Boring Paradise
MD8: New Gazi vs Ethane @ New Gazi
MD9: Ethane vs Damukuni @ King Edward IV Stadium, New Sarum
Mid-WCQ Friendly TBC
MD10: Ethane vs Korizland @ King Edward IV Stadium, New Sarum
MD11: Rebuild the Wall vs Ethane @ Wooden Palisade
MD12: Ethane vs Electrum @ King Edward IV Stadium, New Sarum
MD13: Cetheque vs Ethane @ Cetheque
MD14: Ethane vs The Andromeda Archipelago @ King Edward Stadium, New Sarum
MD15: Tinhampton vs Ethane @ Tinhampton
MD16: Ethane vs Boring Paradise @ King Edward Stadium, New Sarum
MD17: Ethane vs New Gazi @ King Edward Stadium, New Sarum
MD18: Damukuni vs Ethane @ TBC
Post-WCQ Friendly: TBC

Stats
Goals
Samuel Mitchell - 2
Julian Harrington - 1
Assists
Branden Veresoto - 1
Kevyn Stidolph - 1
Dewayne Boivin - 1
Sub Appearances
Samuel Mitchell - 2
Jonathan Harris - 2
Christian Ali - 1
Caleb Powell - 1
Branden Veresoto - 1
Cliff Driscoll - 1
Gerald Coleman - 1
Kyle Cooper - 1
Hayden Watts - 1
Andrew Biley - 1

[Flardania]

Opening Theme

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Bonjour et Ohayōgozaimasu Kirishima. Welcome ladies and gentleman, back to the World Cup 77 Qualifiers edition of the Kitsune Report, brought to you by the Nagatomo Sports Network (NSN), sponsored by Air Pacifica, and Pocari Surge. Here at the Kitsune Report, it's all about Kirishinan sports but right now, world cup football is the primary focus. With matchday 3 completed, how did the Kitsunes fare against Mriin? It's time to get grooving to some world cup football yet again and find out!

Kirishima 1-1 Mriin Review:

Following back to back dominating performances in the form of a 5-0 win against 69th ranked Dainer and a 6-1 win against unranked Turkmenbasyn, the Kitsunes returned to Heiwa, Kirishima for its home opener against Mriin. The Kitsunes came home seeking to string more wins together and add to their impressive start.Despite being the favorites on paper and coming off of back to back huge wins, Seong Mi-Soo was focused before the match and with good reason. Mriin had played well with a win against BOF 63 3rd place finishers Tomikosan and Draw against Dainer. Furthermore, the opposition did play well in their Baptism of Fire so Mriin while in form was certainly going to put up a fight.

The Kitsunes attempted to strike early in the 4th minute but a save by Zilia Hawsorn put any hope of a quick lead by the Kitsune on the shelf. The game had slowed with both teams trying to get a good feel for one another. Taking shots and exchanging time of possession. The first half ended in a nil-nil draw with the opposition having the edge with 5 shots to the Kirishinan 3.

The second half would be much more fulfilling. In the 53rd minute, Rin Mizoguchi got himself an assist after delivering a pass to Josuke Ishikawa who drove the ball low past the keeper who struggled to reach the ball. Kitsunes went up 1-0 at home. Now I don't know about you but I was concerned at how long it took for the Kitsunes to score. It felt like a bad omen not to mention, that you always want to avoid being up by a single point in any sport especially football as it takes just one moment to change an entire game. That moment would come in the 86th minute after a save by Hojo. The opposition was awarded a corner kick which led to a headed goal by Joren Kreuger. At that moment the air within the Magneum Centre just left. Eerie silence when comparing the loud cheers of the home team to the much quieter cheers of the opposition fans. There was practically no time left and four minutes later when the whistle blew, it was apparent that the fans present were taking things hard. It was a home opener against a team where Kirishima was the favorite. Making the draw hurt much more than it should.

Following the match, Manager Seong Mi-Soo had this to say. "......it's tough ya know. To be up against a team that you should beat but don't. I mean I'll take the draw but this is what I meant on media day when I said we needed consistency if want to succeed. We won two matches impressively but struggled to continue the streak. We need to improve on that and our home record especially when we are against weaker teams if we want to progress. Now this will be a test of another key factor discipline. We are a good team now it's a matter of how we react to a setback like this. There are ten teams in each group which mean nineteen matchdays...this was only the third. It's a long qualification with many talented teams all trying to qualify so we need to put setbacks like this behind us if we want to reach the World Cup. "

I agree yet again with the manager on this one. A weakness of the generation of miracles especially as of late in comparison to their dark horse days is their weak morale. A few bad results here and there, especially after a very odd World Cup 75 qualification, would be enough to shatter the team's morale and with it, the teams form would suffer. The Kitsunes need to stand strong and firm regardless of the result.

Kirishima 1 - 1 Mriin 
Ichikawa(53')  Kreuger(86')

Brigantii v Kirishima Preview:

With a 2-0-1 opening record with Kirishima coming off of a disheartening draw, the Kitsunes are back on the road to face the Stags of Brigantii at Warbury Stadium in the capital city Eborum. This will be the Kitsunes first ever encounter with this nation on or off the pitch. This opponent will take comfort at being home in front of their fans and are a squad that can cause the Kitsunes problems. While more defensive than Kirishima, the Stags are still offensive focus meaning another game presumingly with Hojo in the goal. It will be a test on the discipline Seong Mi-Soo preaches, win or lose. Until then Lets Go Kitsunes!

Post by: Keita Woo

[Mriin]

Zilia and Mari wandered along the sidewalk, blending in with the mass of Mriinian tourists gawking at the sleek buildings of Heiwa. The fans--largely decked out in jerseys of their local teams, as the MFA had dropped the ball on getting merchandise for the national team produced in a timely manner--loudly discussed how strange it was that all the buildings were so tall, and not made of made of masonry. And also how they were plastered with strange cartoons of things that were supposedly humans, but even a Satyr could tell something was terribly wrong with their proportions. But the two players could only muster a mild shock at the cafe's staffed by women in skimpy maid outfits, as the Magnaum Centre was growing bigger on the horizon.

"I don't know how I'm going to do this, Mari."

"Are we doing this again? I already gave you the pep talk before the Juvencus game!"

"This isn't the same! That was a Baptism game, against another unranked team. This is Flardania. They've qualified, like, a bunch of times in a row. They're ranked 30th in the world! 30 teams qualify, so they've already made it in by mathematics!"

"Oh come on, you know those rankings are wonky theoretical bull. Joren was telling me about how Nephara won a World Cup and barely gained any ranking for it because of weird technicalities! Like, sure, in the Valanora game we're probably fucked, but Flardania isn't a top side. They're still just on the periphery of the cup, their ranking doesn't mean anything to us."

"Alright, then if we don't care about their ranking, how about their PLUS TEN GOAL DIFFERENTIAL THROUGH TWO GAMES? How the fuck am I supposed to keep up with an offense averaging five goals a game?"

"Against Turkmenbasyn, a total nobody of an unranked nation! And Dainer, who we also lit up for a million goals."

Zilia sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "You mean the team that also lit us up for a million goals?"

"And that was my fault!" Mari gave her a playful push. "Don't you dare put anything that happened in the Dainer game on yourself, I was constantly out of position which let them get unfair shots on goal. And Nev was playing scared the whole game, which didn't help."

"Yeah, he was acting pretty weird. Hopefully he's over whatever funk that was."

"I'm sure he will be, and you need to get over this funk, too! They're human, Zil. Well, at least I think so... they're close enough to human, Zil. There's nothing stopping us from keeping up with them, or beating them, but ourselves. Play the game like you know how to play it and good things will happen."

"Alright, alright, I'll keep my head up and we'll see how it goes."

[The Royal Kingdom of Quebec]

Welcome to my world, heathens.

Matchday Four Cutoff

[Witty Penguins]

(OOC: I missed the deadline, RIP)

Proud sponsor of the Penguinish football team
#GoPenguins

TOP NEWS: President: "We will cut taxes"; gov't increases tax further | Weather: Surprise, It's pretty darn cold

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FOOTBALL: Witty Penguins flippity flopped their way to a loss, again

10 February 2017

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WC77 QUALIFIERS - GROUP 2, MATCHDAY 3
Quakmybush

QMB 1-0 WPG

68' Quakmybush

REVENA, QUAKMYBUSH - Hopefully, Penguinish fans made the most of their win against Whovian Tardisia, because Witty Penguins have stumbled to their second loss in the World Cup 77 Qualifiers. The team failed to gain possession against the home side, with Quakmybush scoring the sole goal of the match.

"Look, I think the team did their best here," coach Kelvin Wood said to the press at the post-match conference. "We were facing a far stronger opponent, one with much more experience than us, there was only so much we could do. We just have to take this as a learning experience and come back stronger." It's only his third match as coach of the national team, however, some fans are already calling for his resignation. Many have been using the hashtag "#FireWood" on social media, including celebrity chef Jordan Wamsey.

Wood will be hoping tomorrow that his team makes some gains in their home match against Drawkland.

---

"Well known" extremist group behind assassination plan

10 February 2017

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UNITIA CITY, SOUTH SPHENSCIPIA - According to the Penguinish Intelligence Service, the people arrested for yesterday's assassination threat against the President were members of a small penguin supremacist group. The PIS still refuse to release the names of those arrested, pending court approval.

Five peope were arrested yesterday in relation to a plot to assassinate President Winters at the World Cup qualifiers match in Macquire, Adelieland. President Winters' plans to attend the match were canceled after the plans were discovered. At a press conference held in Unitia City today, PIS chairman Jacob White revealed further details of the plans. "The five people arrested in relation to the assassination plot were members of an extremist group well known to us - the Penguinish Resistance", he said to reporters.
"These people had been under close surveillance for several months, and after discovering the plot, officers decided to move in and make the arrests."

The Penguinish Resistance are a small group of about 40-60 members who hold strong anti-immigration and penguin supremicist views. They were formed in the 1990's, during a period of unrest between the majority penguin population and minorities. The group is classified by the government as a hate group, and has seen much opposition from pro-unity and immigration groups, especially the Alliance for Sentient Animals. The two groups infamously brawled on Unity Street, Port Aveton on May 19th, 1995, where ASA members on a protest march were ambushed by members of the PR. 14 were injuried and 1 died as a result. Since then, the annual march has seen a large police presence.

At the press conference, the PIS also displayed a group of seized weapons which they believed were to be used in the assassination plot. Among the items were assault rifles and shotguns. The fact that those arrested had access to such weapons has sparked calls by gun-control groups to ban them. "I think this is clear proof that we need better regulations for guns," Gun Sensibility Group chairperson Maria Bill said. "There is absolutely no need for people to have access to assault rifles. They only serve to put innocent people at risk." Meanwhile, Jacques Longbeak, the head of the Penguinish Gun Association, disagreed with a ban. "There are many citizens who own assault rifles and don't use them irresponsibly," he said. "I think what is best is to stamp out the black market trade of weapons by increasing funding to the task force managing that. The black market is likely where these people obtained their guns." The Penguinish Intelligence Service did not yet know how the guns were obtained, but were investigating.

[Jeruselem]

Princess Elsa (Dressed as Amy Pond) and Chloe Dallas (Dressed as Rose Tyler) standing next to blue police phone booth

Chloe: This is Rose Tyler, reporting for Naked News Jeruselem and with me is Amy Pond
Elsa: Hello everyone
Chloe: We're on Earth 13, in Jeruselem at Dazza Dallas Stadium
Elsa: I like this place
Chloe: We're here for the World Cup 77, one of biggest football or soccer sporting events in the universe. In fact, it is ... in this universe
Elsa: Pretty exciting to be here

Chloe: We'll review the results of Group 2 where there were other games other than this one.
Elsa: We could get to them in the TARDIS if we wanted to
Chloe: Nah, we'll stay here.
Elsa: Good idea
Chloe: Witty Pengiuns hosted Drawkland and got away with 0-0 draw
Elsa: Interesting result, I expected Drawkland to win that one

Chloe: Darmen hosted the high flying Garifunya, and Garifunya held Darmen to a 1-1 draw
Elsa: Well, Garifunya held Jeruselem to 3-3 draw in Garifunya so Garifunya are a team to watch because they are proving to be dangerous. Holding Darmen and Jeruselem to draws is not a simple thing.
Chloe: Barunia scored a home win, 1-0 over Willinois
Elsa: A team Jeruselem have to keep an eye on as well
Chloe: Bonesea visited Quakmybush and went home with 3 points winning 4-2 against the hosts
Elsa: Another contender Bonesea, I think this group is going to be real tight

Chloe: Now for the game here
Elsa: Whovian Tardisia came to Jeruselem, but it seems none of them are time lords
Chloe: Yes, I was expecting a few TARDISes to arrive but that didn't happen
Elsa: Yes, but I have mine right here
Chloe: Does it work?
Elsa: Sort of

Chloe: Well their strip is blue ... tardis blue like
Elsa: True
Chloe: Anyway, Whovian Tardisia didn't win and lost to the Princesss 2-1
Elsa: Yes, they were outclassed totally against a team who's been around for a while, maybe a millenia or ten
Chloe: The Princesses really didn't even work that hard
Elsa: Just recovering from our recent trip

Chloe: The table for Group 2 after four games!
Elsa: Well, Bonesea lead the group with 4 wins, followed by Jeruselem on 3 wins and 1 draw.
Chloe: Not surprising really given the draws the other teams had
Elsa: Darmen on 2 wins, 1 draw and that loss in 3rd. Barunia who are hot and cold with 2 wins and 2 draws.
Chloe: Yes, they are bit hot and cold
Elsa: But you can't write them off

Chloe: Drawkland, with 1 win and 2 draws and one loss in 5th. Garifunya on the same but their goal difference sucks.
Elsa: Quakmybush have 1 win, 1 draw and 2 losses. Really need to stop losing.
Chloe: Witty Penguins just under quak, in 8th an well, almost the same results
Elsa: The whovians in 9th with one win and three losses
Chloe: Willinois last with all losses not good
Elsa: They need to get some points

Chloe: Yes well, that's all from Rose and Amy here
Elsa: We have to go off and battle some aliens
Chloe: I spotted some Cybermen down the road
Elsa: That's not good news
Chloe: You seen Clara?
Elsa: No

Chloe: We have to go
Elsa: Yes
Chloe: See you all next game
Elsa: I hope we aren't playing football againsy Cybermen
Chloe: Yeah
Elsa: Hope not

OOC

Group 2
Witty Penguins 0–0 Drawkland
Jeruselem 3–1 Whovian Tardisia
Darmen 1–1 Garifunya
Barunia 1–0 Willinois
Quakmybush 2–4 Bonesea

[Schottia]

The Art of Sneaking

Part five.

Mr & Mrs Hanson

'Jesus Christ!' Claire Hanson shook her head as she looked into the back garden, at the wanton and hateful destruction of her parents' property. There were torn of bits of plants and bushes up and down the length of the path, smashed flowerpots, and stray clumps of soil everywhere. The lawn, her father's pride and joy, lay in ruin, already beginning to yellow under the weed killer. 'Have you phoned the police mum?' She asked, her voice on the verge of breaking up.

'No, darling.' Claire's mother shook her head. You're father doesn't want to, I think it's too much for him to deal with right now.' Mrs Hanson let out a sigh, which could have been about either the incident, her husband, or both. 'Thank you for bringing Enrico round, it means a lot to your father... getting to see the wee lad, I mean.'

'Oh no problem mum,' Claire put an arm around her mother's shoulders and gave her a little squeeze. 'I'm just glad this happened when I was here with the team, rather than in SJG.' The Schottia Physio's eyes eventually landed on the pond. 'Are the fish okay?' She asked, noticing the upturned wheelie bin floating in the water.

'Yes dear,' her mother answered, returning the squeeze. 'Neptune and Poseidon are just fine. Your father fished the goldfish out last night, and popped them in the bath tub.' Her husband had almost been in tears at the thought of the loss of his beloved pets. This garden had been his world, and the vandals could have had no idea of the distress they had caused to the Hanson family. The attack felt personal, and in a quiet council estate where nothing much ever happened, it was worse than anything the middle-aged couple had ever imagined.

'I still think you should call the police.' Said Claire walking up to the far end of the garden she had loved so much as a child. 'I mean look what they did to your greenhouse.'

'We...' Mrs Hanson smiled knowingly. That was actually your father, he tried to throw a brick at the kid and missed.' She sighed once more; she had been doing a lot of sighing recently. 'He has such a temper sometimes, and recently, after the derby defeat... Oh my god, he has been as grumpy as ten men.'

'Was that who did it, some kid?' At Claire's count only two panes of glass had been blown out. She was doing a quick count of the damage, and fully intended to give her parents the money they would need to put everything back to the way it was. 'I really don't know what the world is even coming to. What would possess them to do this!? You and dad are honest, hard working people.'

'I've no idea darling. Your father seemed to reckon it was an older lad, he never got a good look at him though.' Mrs Hanson noticed her daughter stick her hand through the hole in the fence. 'Also your dad, I'm afraid.' She said without a breath of humour. 'Same with the gate: he rammed it off its hinges when he was giving chase.'

Claire lifted the tall garden gate back up into its frame, trying in vain to see if it could be reattached easily enough. 'What a thing to happen, bloody arsehole kid!' Just them something else grabbed her attention. 'No mum, no...!'

'Oh Claire...' Mrs Hanson placed a hand to her mouth as her voice began to quiver. 'Please don't look at it, I... I didn't mean for you to see...'

Claire fell to her hands and knees, turning over the small pieces of shattered clay. 'No, not Mr Lovely-Ears.' She almost felt an urge to cry, as she realised that it was indeed the remains of the clay rabbit she had made her dad as a birthday present while in Kindergarten. The same wonky garden ornament,which had sat in her parents' garden for the last thirty years.

'I'm so sorry Claire.' Her mother had tears in her eyes as she spoke. 'I'll get some superglue and put it back together.'

'It's fine.' Claire was on her feet again, she was an adult, a mother herself, she had to be strong. 'Let's go back inside and see how Dad and Enrico are getting on.'

Claire's parents generally used their living room sparingly. Instead, they spent most of there time in what was the kitchen dinning room, where they had a small tv and a couple of armchairs against the back wall. The living room (or front room, as Mrs Hanson would always call it) was generally only used for guests. This was where they found the boys, Mr Hanson and Enrico, sitting near an upturned box of Claire's old toys, which Mrs Hanson kept in the house for her grandson's visits.

'So how are my two favourite men getting on? Or... maybe I should say two of my three favourite...' She knelt down to Enrico's level, and ruffled his hair playfully. 'I saw the mess outside Dad, I can't believe those kids would do something like that?'

'Aye, well...' Mr Hanson shook his thick domelike head. 'Bloody animals, kids these days. I tell ye, if I'd caught the wee bugger, I'd have skinned him alive.'

Claire placed a sympathetic hand on her father's shoulder. All through her life her father had been her rock, her protector, and it upset her to see him defeated like this. She had always had to be careful as to which boys she dated at school, as the weaker ones would have simply wilted in Mr Hanson's stare. This was probably part of the reason she had finally married a guy like Leonardo.

'If you like I can ask Leonardo to come round later Dad?' Claire added kindly. 'Maybe help you put some of the Garden back together. I would offer myself, but, you know...' She pointed to her pregnant belly. Claire didn't have long to go until the due date, and she was beginning to get tired - not that she would ever admit it. She was putting a brave face on things, but she was counting down the days now until she went on maternity leave.

Mr Hanson shook his head, he never liked to be a bother to anyone. 'No Claire, but that's good of ye to offer.' Her father came from a generation where you kept a stiff upper lip when times were tough. 'He'll huv enough on his plate the'now with the football.' Claire wished he would accept some help, but she didn't want to push him.

'And how are you Enrico? Have you had fun with Granddad?' Claire smiled warmly at her son, who judging by his expression had been having a whale of a time.

The boy nodded quickly. 'Playing foo-ball,' he answered before grinning from ear to ear.

'Yay! Very good.' Claire smiled back. 'Your granddad taught me how to play football too; not that it ever did much good.' She looked back to her father, glad that this family time had been well spent.

'Yer mum is talking a load of rubbish Enrico. She was a brilliant footballer too, when she was a wee lass.' He placed a hand on the young boy's shoulder. 'Go on. Tell your mum what else I taught you today. What do we think of Handon United?' Mr Hanson watched on, his face beaming with pride.

'Yucky Blaaaaghrrrr!' Enrico screwed up his face, as if he had been forced to bite into a lemon. Claire tutted her disapproval, but allowed herself a smile all the same. She remembered her father having similar conversations with her about football. If it wasn't Leonardo teaching him to hate FAS, it was Mr Hanson teaching him to hate United. Claire wasn't opposed to a strong friendly rivalry - how could she be - but she did find hate to be a very strong term.

'Very good.' Mr Hanson seemed satisfied with his morning's work. 'And show Mum what we do when we see Handon United.' He held the back page of a newspaper in front of his grandson, pointing at a picture of Rebecca Talla.

'Pow-pow-pow!' The young boy responded as he punched the picture as hard as he could, ripping it from Mr Hanson's hands.

'Dad!' Claire snapped, picking her son up while shaking her head. 'He's too young to learn stuff like that. You'll have him hitting the other kids at Kindergarten.' The last thing she wanted was her son becoming the next oddball of Multiverse-football, but given both sides of his family, she didn't know what chance he stood of avoiding such a fate. 'Come on, give Granddad Hanson a cuddle, and then go and say goodbye to Granny.' She placed Enrico back down on the floor and he immediately ran to Mr Hanson, who gave him a squeeze, before affectionately ruffling his hair.

'Right Dad, take care.' Claire stood on her tiptoes, so as she could plant a kiss on her father's cheek. 'We'll be between Schottia and San Jose Guayabal for a bit, but if there is anything I can do, then, you know...' She could tell from her father's posture that he was still smouldering inside. The attack on his property had been one he had taken personally. She had scarcely ever seen him this upset, and for a second she though a tear might issue from the corner of his eye, before he snuffed it out with a loud clap of his shovel like hands.

'Aye, take care of yourself too Claire.' He squeezed his hands together in front of him with a force that would have cracked a walnut. 'And make sure you give our regards to Leonardo. Wish him all the best for the World Cup, unless he is playing Schottia, eh?' Claire smiled warmly at her father's attempt at humour, patting him again on the shoulder before turning to leave.

'Okay Enrico, let's get you home for lunch.' She said checking the time on the wall clock, before lifting her son onto her shoulders.

'Mummy.' The small boy said joyfully, as they walked from the house. 'I hate Ham-dum Oonited!!!' *

*Handon United, for those of you who can't speak toddler.