World Bowl XXXI Everything Thread

by **Banija** » Mon Dec 19, 2016 10:23 am

The All-Banija Sports Magazine
The only nationwide publication that is all sports, all the time!

With Dennis Zervos missing; Banija puts a 50-16 licking on Main Nation Ministry with deepening political tensions in the backdrop

Zivorad Dvorak(#21) celebrates his touchdown run on the game's opening drive against Main Nation Ministry

MAIN NATION MINISTRY- There was simply a scary political backdrop surrounding this football game. While we are strictly sports, and what we'll talk about is strictly sports-based and sports-related, tensions between Banija and Main Nation Ministry are easily at an all-time high. Main Nation Ministry flags are getting burned, as reports leak that the cyanide that killed Omugaba Immaculate was traced back to Main Nation Ministry. And then, with Dennis Zervos missing the morning before the match and hasn't been seen since, more fear and paranoia of Main Nation Ministry has spread among the Banijan populace.

Which, of course, led to this football game being the most watched Group Stage game in Banijan history. Many are implicating the Main Nation Ministry, and already, images of burning Main Nation Ministry flags, as well as large-scale protests at the Main Nation Ministry, lead to Banijan hatred of this team. With stepped up military protection from the hosts after Zervos' disappearance to make sure nobody else went missing, the game went on as scheduled, and boy, was it ugly. Banijans being blamed for a terrorist attack the day before their arrival in Main Nation Ministry, of course, did not help tensions either.

Banijan players were filled with rage, due to the assassination of their own princess, and they took their vengeance out on Main Nation Ministry on the football field. They came out, focused, and hit harder than anybody had ever seen them hit before. A couple of the hits, especially on the quarterback, were dirty, and even the young David Franklin, the starting outside linebacker, was ejected from the game, since during a sideline scuffle, he threw a right hook at Main Nation Ministry Assistant Head Coach Lt. General Emmanuel Jones.

The team, of course, has suspended him for one additional game, meaning that David Franklin will travel back to Banija early, and will not travel to Santaclausisgodistan, when Banija goes there for a chance to try and clinch the division. Even the head coach, Ezekiel Daniachew, got in on it. He never rested his starters, and never took his foot off of the gas pedal. When his team score a touchdown with 38 seconds left in the 4th quarter, up 48-16, he decided to go for 2 to make it a round 50. Slawomir Kovach, making his first World Bowl start since the group stages of World Bowl 29, threw a perfect fade to Robel Kassa to give Banija an even 50 points.

At that point, the rest of the game could not be finished, as fights started breaking out between players and the referees decided that they could not finish the last 38 seconds of regulation, and that since the game seemed to be in the bag, With Daniachew's decision to run up the score, the brawls started right at that moment. Linkage Taxon threw a punch at Robel Kassa, and the benches emptied. With the massiveness of the brawl, officials are still investigated, but no players will be suspended for punching fellow players. Josiah McFadden, the starting left guard, and Ignatius Baros, the team's #4 receiver, both received one game suspensions as well, as they hit fans in the face. The chaotic scene was only settled by shots fired by the Banijan security forces sent to guard this football team, who shepherded this team directly to the airport and got them out of the country as soon as possible.

------------------------------------------
Royal Palace; 1:00 PM local time; 1 day after the Banijan-Main Nation Ministry Game

The Core 4+1 were meeting, and it was going to be an ugly one. The Core 4, meaning the King, the Crown Prince, his son, and the Katikkiro, and the one being the Waziri, knew that something was up. One of their nationals was kidnapped, and people in Banija were demanding blood. The Katikkiro brought back an order from the Lukiiko, which was the Banijan Parliament, that wanted to give a Parliamentary Medal of Honor to David Franklin for his actions in the game against Main Nation Ministry.

Support for David Franklin, after his automatic 1 game suspension for violence against a non-player during a game, was pouring out from across Banija. In just one day, the starting prodigy outside linebacker had turned into a kingmaker in Banija. The military had to deploy special ops forces for each player on the team, as well as 10 for the support staff(coaches, trainers, etc...) just to get the rest of them home safely. And still, nobody knew where Dennis Zervos was.

"Gentleman, let us start this meeting." Said Kabaka Mugisha III. Everybody, in respect to the King, bowed, and then, in succession, the Katikkiro, Omugabe Mwanga, and the Waziri bowed to the Crown Prince, Isebantu Albert, and then the Katikkiro and the Waziri bowed to the last member of the Royal Family present, Omugabe Mwanga, whose daughter was the victim of the attack.

"What motive does the Main Nation Ministry have to attack us?" said the King. "Why would they? I am suspicious."

"I have no idea, but the evidence is clear." Said the Katikkiro. "What private citizens in Main Nation Ministry, which is the strictest of military states, have access to something like cyanide? And then, having them blame us for that terrorist attack in Main Nation Ministry? This is madness! Your Majesty, the Constitution grants you full and complete powers over foreign affairs, and I respect that. But you must do something. Inaction breeds weakness. We must defend the honor of this glorious country." The Kabaka himself was hesitant, but everybody in that meeting was passionate. He would have to speak to his son about controlling a room like this later- there was a reason that the Monarch was granted power over foreign affairs. However, he saw that he did not have a choice. The Lukiiko had already taken the side of nationalists.

He told his Waziri to recall the Banijan Ambassador to Main Nation Ministry, issue a travel ban, and then evict the Main Nation Ministry Ambassador. Then, he wrote a letter himself to the Main Nation Ministry Government, which would for now ignore that incident in the city sector.

Code: Select all: To: General Winston Harrington of Main Nation Ministry It is my regret that my only great-granddaughter, and formerly 3rd in line to the Banijan throne, and as the 1st child of the 1st son of my 1st son, a future Queen of Banija, has died via cyanide. This, of course, my investigators have pinpointed to originate in Main Nation Ministry. Now, alongside tensions between our gridiron teams, we would like to inform you that, if proven to be connected to your government, an assassination of a person directly in the line of succession will be considered an act of war, and we will be forced to respond accordingly. Now, personally, I am skeptical that your government was connected. Although I am King, I face the same political pressures as any other leader. Now, what worries me, is the disappearance of Dennis Zervos. Where is our quarterback? Why would he be kidnapped? These questions, of course, need to be answered quickly. From: Kabaka Mugisha III Reigning Monarch of Banija

------------------------------------------
Somewhere in Rural Southeastern Buosga Region, Banija; 10:00 AM local time; 2 days after the Banijan-Main Nation Ministry Game

Dennis Zervos had been wandering around for 3 days. He knew that he was back home, in Banija- he was in some extremely, rural, backwater village that was barely on the grid. He could tell, because nobody recognized who he was. Nobody here had television, or radios, or anything. He knew what this region was- Busoga. The poorest region of Banija, extremely rural, very Islamic, the sport that they cared about was basketball. There wasn't a single football code that could gain a foothold in this region.

He had eaten at a woman's house for 2 days, then left. He was told that the taxis came to this village once a week. He needed to go to a different village, one where he could be saved. He had heard disturbing information about Main Nation Ministry, and yet, he feared for his life. He was supposed to release it at the right time- but when the hell was that?

Finally, Dennis Zervos got to the next village, going 25 miles on foot over the course of a day, and almost collapsed when he got to the next place. When he came to, somebody recognized him. "Dennis!" yelled a little kid. One of the few gridiron fans in this desolate, backwater region of Banija, Zervos was here for one reason, and one reason only- to try and find some way to get to Istria, or even back to Busukuma.

"Kid, I need help." Slurred Dennis. He hadn't eaten in a day, and though he had water, he needed food. "What day is it? Where the heck am I? And who are you? You should call the police... I need to get back to.. back to Busukuma." The kid, still excited, but unsure what was happening, asked for an autograph. Dennis signed his shirt, and then he ran excitedly back to his father's. At last, Dennis could understand what the heck was going on...

------------------------------------------
Lakiska Islamic Hospital, Busoga Region; 7:30 PM local time ; 2 days after the Banijan-Main Nation Ministry Game

Headline: Missing national quaterback Dennis Zervos found and put in a hospital in Lakiska

LAKISKA- This is a quick headline from the Associated Banijan Press. Dennis Zervos was found in rural Busoga, and transported to a hospital in the regional capitol city of Lakiska. There are still no answers into why he's there, or how he got there. The doctors are 'not worried about his life', though it looks like Dennis Zervos went into a state of shock once he reached the hospital. More details will be reported as soon as they are found.

by **Chromatika** » Mon Dec 19, 2016 11:46 am

Chromatik National Gridiron Football Team
The Iron Legion

Head Coach: Henrik Von Schroeder, 49, LVi, Qet Lynx
After leading the Lynx to the inaugural Chromatik Football League title, Von Schroeder hopes to echo the success in the international stage.

Assistant Coach: Kevin Newmann, 46, DIn, Chromatik City Cyan
[spoiler=53 Man Roster]

#    Pos   First       Last        Age    Height    Weight    Rank    Team                 
 1     P   Jeremy      Duncan       24    186 cm     73 kg    D In    Brisara Juggernauts    
 6     K   Harry       Garner       28    192 cm     82 kg    L Vi    Qet Lynx               
 7     K   Randy       Head         32    198 cm     80 kg    M Bl    Chromatik City Cyan       		
 8     P   Ivan        Stokes       32    176 cm     83 kg    M Vi    Staramara Angels       
10    QB   Anthony     Rivers       27    209 cm    105 kg    L In    Chromatik City Cyan        
12    QB   Nathaniel   Mercado      30    184 cm     98 kg    M In    Qet Lynx                   
13    QB   Mark        Rush         28    196 cm     98 kg    D Vi    Depri Lanar Turtles     
15    WR   Francis     Armstrong    26    214 cm     86 kg    L Bl    Chromatik City Cyan         
18    WR   William     Washington   29    206 cm     89 kg    M Vi    Brisara Juggernauts       
19    WR   Derrick     Wiley        33    222 cm     88 kg    D In    Depri Lanar Turtles      
22    CB   Ernest      Ashley       30    207 cm     82 kg    M In    Knetyohai Icebreakers  
24    HB   Leonardo    Curry        35    186 cm    113 kg    L Vi    Depri Sanar Batallion   
27    HB   David       McDonald     29    179 cm    106 kg    M Vi    Chromatik City Cyan    
28    SS   Earl        Bass         26    195 cm     98 kg    D In    Qet Lynx                   
29    FS   Jimmy       Sawyer       30    197 cm     94 kg    M Vi    Brisara Juggernauts    
32    FB   Robert      Harrington   35    180 cm    102 kg    D Vi    Depri Lanar Turtles    
35    CB   Maurice     McLean       30    210 cm     91 kg    M Bl    Qet Lynx               
39    FS   Gary        Farley       33    198 cm     94 kg    L In    Qet Lynx               
41   OLB   Timothy     Clay         29    187 cm     92 kg    M Vi    Chromatik City Cyan   
42    FB   Alberto     Dean         35    172 cm    100 kg    D In    Qet Lynx    
43    TE   Dave        Blackwell    30    194 cm     98 kg    L Vi    Staramara Angels 		
44    HB   Gene        Stewart      27    184 cm     99 kg    M In    Brisara Juggernauts		
45    CB   Robert      Stewart      31    210 cm     87 kg    M Vi    Chromatik City Cyan
47    SS   Seth        Hendricks    26    192 cm     89 kg    D Bl    Qet Lynx
49    CB   Lester      Russell      32    184 cm     91 kg    D Vi    Alnio Pirates
50   OLB   Todd        Snyder       29    176 cm    102 kg    L In    Brisara Juggernauts
52   MLB   Troy        Pace         28    182 cm    111 kg    M Vi    Qet Lynx
53    LE   Jerry       Young        35    186 cm    134 kg    M Bl    Depri Sanar Batallion
56   OLB   Clinton     Foster       33    192 cm    100 kg    D Vi    Chromatik City Cyan
58    DT   Glen        James        30    175 cm    125 kg    D In    Staramara Angels
59   MLB   Jonathan    O'Neal       28    163 cm     94 kg    L In    Depri Lanar Turtles
61    DT   Barry       Diaz         31    162 cm    112 kg    L Bl    Qet Lynx
62    RE   Dwayne      Flores       33    179 cm    124 kg    L Vi    Brisara Juggernauts
68    LT   Clayton     Randolph     29    186 cm    135 kg    M Vi    Chromatik City Cyan
70    LT   Lester      Townsend     30    183 cm    136 kg    M In    Qet Lynx
71    LG   Johnathan   Garcia       25    201 cm    138 kg    D In    Knetyohai Icebreakers
72    RG   Dan         Barnett      31    186 cm    142 kg    D Vi    Alnio Pirates
74     C   Byron       Sheppard     27    192 cm    154 kg    D Bl    Depri Sanar Batallion
77    RT   Thomas      Acevedo      33    186 cm    158 kg    L Vi    Qet Lynx
78    RG   Jeffery     Sweet        26    184 cm    143 kg    L In    Chromatik City Cyan
79    RT   Jim         Byrd         30    186 cm    156 kg    M Bl    Depri Lanar Turtles
80    WR   Daniel      Acevedo      31    179 cm     95 kg    D Vi    Alnio Pirates
81    WR   Marshall    Reese        28    212 cm     85 kg    M Vi    Depri Sanar Batallion
84    WR   Brandon     Bridges      28    210 cm     89 kg    M In    Qet Lynx	        
88    TE   Neil        Frye         33    196 cm     92 kg    D Vi    Chromatik City Cyan
89    TE   Walter      Bradley      25    187 cm     94 kg    L Vi    Alnio Pirates
90   OLB   Steve       Wilcox       29    182 cm     99 kg    M Vi    Qet Lynx       
94   OLB   Jack        Davenport    24    191 cm     98 kg    M Vi    Brisara Juggernauts    
95    DT   Zachary     Pena         30    181 cm    142 kg    L In    Qet Lynx               
96    NT   Howard      McLaughlin   31    194 cm    154 kg    D Vi    Depri Sanar Batallion  
97   MLB   Michael     Lynch	    28    186 cm     85 kg    D In    Staramara Angels	     
98    LE   Marvin      Hernandez    26    184 cm     95 kg    M Vi    Alnio Pirates          
99    RE   Allen       Griffith     30    174 cm     97 kg    M Bl    Qet Lynx

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my Scorers: Yes, but read my roster!
Choose Scoring Events: Yes, but read my roster!
Godmod Scoring Events: No
RP Injuries to my Players: Yes, but I get to choose the severity
Godmod Injuries to my Players: No
Godmod Other Events: No

Style Modifier: +4.75

by **Main Nation Ministry** » Mon Dec 19, 2016 3:12 pm

Hell

Training Area

"Ughh....I can't believe you taking me on one of your investigation bullshit trips." the girlfriend of The Truth News journalist Jason said as their car parked near the Training Area where the Main Nation Ministry football team trained. "Michelle, I'm just doing my job. Besides, The Truth News has been repeatedly denied from interviewing the football team. Don't you find that strange?" "Jason, they are clearly under a lot of stress from that terrorist attack." "What about that mass fight back at Banija? Clearly we would interview the players on their thoughts, but we still getting denied. The Truth News wants just a single interview from one of the team members." "That's isn't goi- Wait a minute, you going to trespass a government building?! They throw us in jail!" "Relax." Jason said as he shows Michelle a small jimmy bar. "They only give out the death penalty to murders. You be the one staying in the car."

Jason walked to the front doors of the training area, finding it locked. Jason pried open one of the doors and ventured in. It was dark inside, as usual, since it was the middle of the night. Jason pulled out a flashlight and looked around in the hallways. There was clearly no one around, but the training area was on the 3rd floor. Rather than take the elevator, since that would cause noise and there would probably be a janitor somewhere, he took the stairs to the 3rd floor.

When he opened the door to the 3rd floor from the stairs, there was a change in atmosphere. The hallways in the 3rd floor appeared abandoned and neglected. Did the general have no janitors on this floor? Jason looked around and saw a door labeled Training Area, that leaded to two metal double doors. A foul odor was coming from the doors as Jason saw some flies crawling in between the doors. He slowly pull open the doors, as the odor got worse. Jason put his left hand to cover his nostrils, as he looked in the darkness. He shined his flashlight into the darkness to see a wide room, the size of a football stadium. On the floors were puddles of blood that was the source of the odor. "The hell is this?" Jason whispered to himself as he tried to not step into one of the puddles. There was a door labeled Barracks, but it was electronically locked. A jimmy bar couldn't work on the door, only a keycard. He left the training area and examined more of the 3rd floor where he found the General's office.

The door was already unlocked, but why would the General leave his own office door unlocked? Jason looked in to see the weirdest thing he saw as the blood puddles. All over the office was nothing but empty nasal spray bottles. Everywhere. Jason didn't get the full story still, but what he guessed is that the General is hiding a drug addiction that would cause a scandal for the World Bowl and get himself fired by the Leader, but what was with the blood puddles? He picked up one of the nasal spray bottles and examined it.

"I told you people...."

"To not interview them!"

Jason immediately turned around to see the General strike him on the head with a golf club. Jason fell to the floor, as he tried to regain his thoughts, only to immediately be struck again. And again. And again. And again till the golf club snapped in half with the General using the bottom half to impale Jason in the chest. Jason lied on the floor, dead. Now the General needed to dispose him somehow.

The Truth News

Tensions for War Arise, Critics Worry About Main Nation Ministry's Nuclear Weaponary

"In a dark age where paranoia is at an all time high, due to horrendous terrorist attacks related to both Main Nation Ministry and Banija. The latest incident, being the "supposed" kidnapping of Dennis Zervos and the ugly fight that happened on the match day. The General has been thinking of invading the nation of Banija and rename it The Ministry of Banija, with critics overwhelmingly negative of the response from the General. While Banija appears to be a peaceful nation, flags of the Main Nation Ministry were shown being burned by angry fans of Banija. More details will follow after the next match day."

Respected Journalist from The Truth News Found Dead

"Today, respected journalist Jason Harper was found dead in an alleyway who was a journalist who worked with us at The Truth News. Jason Harper was a respected journalist who did his job with respect and for respect to the nation. Jason was found dead today having died from a sharp object punctured into his stomach. The murder weapon isn't found as the lack of suspects make the case difficult. The only prime suspect is his girlfriend Michelle McQueen who immediately denies murdering her own boyfriend, who claimed that whatever the motive was, it had to be about one of the stories he was investigating. Michelle also admits of Jason trying to get an interview from the football team, but hasn't returned to Michelle who was in their car parked near the Training Area. So far, the General has denied detectives from entering the Training Area or any building near it for "government purposes". What made the case difficult, also was the fact that the government refuses detectives to watch security footage from the crime scene for unknown reasons."

"A funeral will be held for Jason Harper tomorrow and journalists from The Truth News are encouraged to attend."

Letters

Two letters were send to Kabaka Mugisha III, each from different people.

Code: Select all: To: Kabaka Mugisha III of Banija You people of Banija are nothing, but fools, cheaters, liars, murders, and terrorists. We have immediately deployed a new rule in the death penalty to have all tourists from Banija immediately executed. What you did to the families and friends of the football team is an atrocity. What you did to ignite a fight at the Match Day is enough for me to start thinking about plans. From: General Winston Harrington Main Nation Ministry Fuck you.

The next letter had words labeled "Top Secret: Do not show to any citizen from Main Nation Ministry"

Code: Select all: Warning: If this letter is shown to any citizen, tourist, terrorist, criminal, or government official from Main Nation Ministry, there will be unforeseen consequences. To: Kabaka Mugisha III of Banija Dear, Mr. Kabaka. We are sorry for the death of your child by this act of terrorism. We have reason to believe that the culprit responsible for this is an infamous terrorist from Main Nation Ministry known as Jane Doe. Jane Doe is a terrorist who is extremely unpredictable and could have likely killed hundreds before any crimes by her were listed. We do have reason to believe that she is an ally with General Winston Harrington. We have reason to believe that General Winston Harrington is attempting to stage a coup d'etat on Main Nation Ministry by causing tensions to grow, then declaring himself as ruler. We are sorry for that horrible events have occurred involving you over a simple football tournament, as we do not wish to have wars started in our nation. We have received word that your quarterback Dennis Zervos had went missing for a short while during the match day, however we deny knowing what has happened to him. We immediately rule out that whoever kidnapped him wasn't the general, as he would've immediately killed him, sparking war. Reasons for kidnapping are not known, as Jane Doe couldn't be the reason as she would've have killed him as well. Now, the important part. The General has been doing illegal methods to prevent me from returning back to my nation. The General has disabled communications from the nation to me and has prevented transportation to Main Nation Ministry, knowing I would return by plane. What the general has done is grounds to send him to the northwest of our nation for testing. Please immediately respond, so we can have a meeting to discuss the matter. Sincerely, The Leader Main Nation Ministry

by **Drawkland** » Mon Dec 19, 2016 4:33 pm

GRID CORPS BESTS FRENLINE DELPHA, OFFICIALLY QUALIFIED
Written By: Phillip Ward and Ben Lincoln

RECENT RESULTS
FROM BANK of ACEDONIA DIVISION:
Oisinistan 10–15 Drawkland
Fujisawan Territories 17–7 Fleuronordicia
Oisinistan 33–3 Republic of Rawn
Fujisawan Territories 20–19 United States of Devonta
Frenline Delpha 38–0 Fleuronordicia
Allamunnic Sporting Commission 17–37 Drawkland
Drawkland 42–27 Fleuronordicia
Oisinistan 24–29 Fujisawan Territories
Fleuronordicia 0–24 Ethane
Drawkland 63–9 Selvera
Thereisnogodistan 47–17 Oisinistan
Korizland 17–50 Fujisawan Territories
Republic of Rawn 0–23 Fleuronordicia
United States of Devonta 13–40 Drawkland
Oisinistan 20–43 Frenline Delpha
Fujisawan Territories 6–17 Allamunnic Sporting Commission
Fujisawan Territories 17–54 Drawkland
Fleuronordicia 34–3 Oisinistan
Ethane 45–0 Oisinistan
Selvera 16–13 Fujisawan Territories
Fleuronordicia 10–29 Thereisnogodistan
Drawkland 56–13 Korizland
Drawkland 27–6 Oisinistan
Fleuronordicia 13–23 Fujisawan Territories
Oisinistan 40–0 Selvera
Fujisawan Territories 13–13 Ethane (19–16 OT)
Allamunnic Sporting Commission 44–20 Fleuronordicia
Frenline Delpha 22–26 Drawkland
Fleuronordicia 7–18 United States of Devonta
Drawkland 60–9 Republic of Rawn
Thereisnogodistan 23–36 Fujisawan Territories
Korizland 14–20 Oisinistan
Fleuronordicia 0–32 Drawkland
Fujisawan Territories 33–13 Oisinistan
Bank of Acedonia Division         Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Drawkland                        11   11   0   452  143 +309
2 Fujisawan Territories            11    8   3   263  219  +44
3 Oisinistan                       11    3   8   186  290 −104
4 Fleuronordicia                   11    2   9   141  270 −129
Nicholls Enterprises Conference    Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD
 1 Drawkland                        11   11   0   452  143 +309
 2 Frenline Delpha                  11   10   1   407  151 +256
 3 Ethane                           11    9   2   327   61 +266
 4 Fujisawan Territories            11    8   3   263  219  +44
 5 United States of Devonta         11    7   4   289  207  +82
 6 Thereisnogodistan                11    7   4   406  223 +183
 7 Allamunnic Sporting Commission   11    4   7   277  343  −66
 8 Oisinistan                       11    3   8   186  290 −104
 9 Republic of Rawn                 11    3   8   151  350 −199
10 Fleuronordicia                   11    2   9   141  270 −129
11 Selvera                          11    2   9   111  377 −266
12 Korizland                        11    0  11   100  476 −376

World Bowl XXXI Schedule - Grid Corps
Home Team Listed First
1. Oisinistan 10–15 Drawkland
2. Allamunnic Sporting Commission 17–37 Drawkland
3. Drawkland 42–27 Fleuronordicia
4. Drawkland 63–9 Selvera
5. United States of Devonta 13–40 Drawkland
6. Fujisawan Territories 17–54 Drawkland
7. Drawkland 56–13 Korizland
8. Drawkland 27–6 Oisinistan
9. Frenline Delpha 22–26 Drawkland
10. Drawkland 60–9 Republic of Rawn
11. Fleuronordicia 0–32 Drawkland
12. Drawkland - Thereisnogodistan
13. Ethane - Drawkland
14. Drawkland - Fujisawan Territories

Well ... I guess we really spoiled it there in the title. Our bad. We try not to do that, y'know, but we just can't help it. But anyhow, yes! The Grid Corps has not only defeated the Frenline Delpha Anacondas and improved the rivalry record, but also squashed the Republic of Rawn and Fleuronordicia to remain undefeated and clinch a playoff appearance for World Bowl XXXI, whether it's as the Bank of Acedonia Divisional winner or as the Wildcard holder for the Nicholls Enterprises Conference. The latter, however, would only occur if Drawkland takes 3 huge L's for the last 3 games of the divisional stage, which we all know is highly unlikely and only the craziest of wagerers would spring for.

Also, do you like that official Grid Corps helmet graphic up at the header? We do too. We finally managed to steal a spare helmet and smuggle it into our photography studio to get some nice shots of it. Enjoy it, because now I think the Corps might press charges. Speaking of which, after this edition, the Corps is planning to probably field a new-look helmet starting next Bowl, where there might also be slight changes to the roster. All of this has been announced recently and subtly by indeterminate sources within DISC and the Grid Corps. A guaranteed addition to the uniforms next edition will be the inclusion of stars on the helmet and edition numbers on the jersey for each World Bowl won by the Corps ... which will be 2 after this one, right?

Let's not be so sure. After 31 Bowls, there's only been 6 teams to win more than one (Sarzonia 2, Delaclava 2, Qazox 2, Cassadaigua 2, Dancougar 3, and Allamunnic States 6), and only one team has ever done it two Bowls in a row, which was, of course, the Regulars, XVI and XVII. Statistically, the odds are against the Corps winning World Bowl XXXI, even though it isn't necessarily against the odds for them to reach the final or win another one (or two, or seven) eventually. But as far as you superstitious betters go, we wouldn't advise putting money on a Grid Corps win this time. It would still be nice to tie some history here, though, and maybe even create some history off of that next edition. On the other hand, this is in the middle of a stretch of non-repeat teams. Since Allamunnic States' 6th win in World Bowl XXVII, Schottia, Anglatia, and yours truly have won the title. The last time a streak of non-repeated titles occurred, it was a 7-edition streak lasting from VII-XIII, starting with Fujisawan Territories' win and ending with Delaclava's first win. The next edition would hold a repeat for Sarzonia, and then one for Delaclava. Before that there was a 3-edition streak which was, unsurprisingly, the first 3 editions of the World Bowl. In other words, statistics also suggest that the winner of this edition will be a repeat winner from a previous edition.

So, who could it be? Definitely Allamunnic States has a chance, to go for their 7th title (which we would absolutely support, because seven), Schottia has a decent chance as well. Saintland (sorry, West Saintland) seems to be faltering, if they reach the playoffs at all we doubt they'll even make it to the final. Of course we have to root for our own Drawkland to get a repeat, as we seem to still be on the up & up. And finally, maybe Fujisawan Territories have a secret weapon to unleash in the playoffs, and they'll come back to get a second title 24 Bowls later, and on their first time back. But for realistic chances, we'd say either Drawkland or Allamunnic States has the best shots at a repeat title this edition.

Now, really, most teams that will qualify for the playoffs have a realistic shot on the title, if we ignore the statistical evidence that there should be a repeat rather than a first-timer. Abanhfleft can't be forgotten, and Frenline Delpha has been looking pretty polished lately (except when they played the Corps of course)! Kaboomlandia's skill cannot be understated, and Gregoryisgodistan is well overdue for a title bout. Cosumar and Royal Kingdom of Quebec are both powerhouses who haven't gotten their fair shares of a win yet, despite having relative success in the Baptism of Irons of old. And finally, Banija has been performing full steam ahead as always, so we would not be shocked at all to see them finally win a semifinal and go on to take the title, especially after having lost two 3rd-place games in a row. They're hungry and skilled, and they've already won some gridiron silverware, albeit in the college football field.

But let's not get too far into the future, shall we? Gotta stay focused on what has just gone down. Like our beautiful heart-pounding defeat of Frenline Delpha! Who needs to win the Bowl when you can destroy the Anacondas? We've already achieved our real objective.

vs FRENLINE DELPHA
As you may tell by the result, which is unusually small score-wise and point margin-wise, this game was a rollicking ride from start to finish. In the heart of Bloodbenderopolis, the Anacondas and the Grid Corps squared up to take the field. Drawkland lost the toss and the Anacondan captain, Steve Moors, elected to receive the opening kickoff. Matthew Watts booted the kickoff with seemingly little effort into the end zone, and thus Neal Rose took the ball and returned it, barely, to the 19 yard line before being shoved down with massive force. Frenline Delpha would go on to make it to the 24 yard line before being stopped, 4th and 6, to take the field goal. An early lead over the Corps, 3-0 Anacondas. However, Drawkland answered with Daniel Madison returning the ball to the Frenlinian 40, before being barely caught and tripped down. Unfortunately, the offensive line for the Grid Corps was slow to begin, as it sometimes is, and was forced a 3-and-Out despite being quite close to the line and of course on the enemy side of the 50 yard line. They called out Matthew Watts to kick, and he obliged, somehow, with a good 46-yard field goal to split the uprights and to tie the score at 3-all. The next Frenlinian possession didn't go too well. Despite the Frenlinian media being assured that the Anacondas were practicing their hardest to stop Drawkland's hardcore early pressure, they simply couldn't keep up with the real deal, at least at the start of the game. They made it far upfield and sucked a lot of the clock, but they got hit hard trying to run the ball over on 4th down with inches to go, and received a turnover on downs. The Grid Corps was only on their own 31 yard line, but managed to fight themselves upfield before being forced to kick another field goal, a 34-yarder to be exact. It was good, giving Drawkland the lead for the first time, 3-6. The crowd was losing their minds.

The First Quarter soon ended, but not before the Anacondas returned the ball and took it to their own 47. After the quarter break, the Anacondas came back with some of the fire they'd talked about in the days coming up to this game. The pocket was more secure for Moors, and the passing game was top-notch as it always is for Frenline Delpha. Unfortuately, big points simply could not materialize on the board. On the first drive of the quarter they managed a good field goal, but Drawkland answered on their next drive. Knowing Drawkland's consistency and power, the Anacondas took the risk and beat as much of the clock as they could on their third drive, allowing the play clock down to 1 or 2 seconds every single play, and going with hard-hitting runs and passes down the field. The yards after catch was abysmal, however, and the runs couldn't get past the stout Drawkian backfield, so there wasn't huge yardage to be had. Eventually it was clear that the Anacondas had played themselves, stuck on their twenty on 4th down and with under 20 seconds left on the half, so they got a field goal to tie the game at 9.

Drawkland got the ball after the half and began returning it. Madison ran for 35 yards but a pesky Anaconda defender managed to fully tackle him from the side to end his dash. The Drawkians did end up scoring a field goal on that drive, but Frenline Delpha still continued to march up and down the field, their offense just barely outmatching the Drawkian defense. They scored 2 more field goals before the quarter was up. Going into the final quarter, the score was 15-12, and the Grid Corps fans were beginning to get nervous.

But then the Corps seemed to find themselves again. They got the ball following a good defensive stand, and Madison returned it to the 50 yard line. Then the Grid Corps hit the Anacondas with probably one of the toughest running stands of the Bowl. Inside, outside, wildcat, draw plays, counters galore. Even Dak Waterman came in with a few slides through to get a first down or some positive yardage. The hapless Anacondas were fooled at every corner, and finally, just when they thought they had the run under control: bomb pass to Daniel Madison to secure a touchdown. With a good PAT from Watts' faithful foot, the score was then 15-19, Drawkland lead. Frenline Delpha brought out their own guns though. Spreading the ball around everywhere, Moors managed to get passes to Smith, Fall, Hoehn, even to Roy and Jones, and runs to Sexton and Taylor. A Sexton 7-yard run to get a touchdown put the game "safely" back into Frenline Delpha's favor, 22-19. There was less than 2 minutes left on the clock after the score. A field goal could tie up the game, but based on what happened last time the Anacondas and Corps went to overtime, Drawkland's boys were too nervous to allow that. They decided they were going to fight for every yard they could get and take the win or the loss. No overtime embarrassments this time around. But it turned out that it wasn't the offense that'd be fighting the final minutes away, it'd be the defense. Madison took the ball at the 1 yard line (a savvy kick by Ron Porter attempting to ensure no touchback and no easy yards for the Corps), but then he accelerated into what every Drawkian fan knows as his last-ditch effort to get points on the board. The ball had swung the same way as the Corps' tide went, and so the Anacondas were bottled up as they went down towards number 89. A defender broke though, and Madison simply shouldered him to the ground. He juked another defender and kept running. It was at this point that Riley Hoyt dove and took out the legs of #78 from the Anacondas. Postgame analysis showed that if this player, Oliver Lockwood, hadn't have been tackled, he would've surely pushed Madison out of bounds and the Corps may not have won the game.

But alas, that didn't happen. Madison was home free and slid right down the hashes, until he slanted across the open field and somersaulted into the endzone right between the middle hashes. The Corps had the lead, 22-26 (after Watts scored the extra point). Only an Anaconda touchdown could take the game from the Drawkians, but with a minute and a half left on the clock after the drive, the poor little snakes couldn't rush plays fast enough, couldn't throw passes long enough, or bully the backfield strong enough. The final pass was slung hard into Drawkian territory, but an unfortunate pick by Osman Oswald on the one-yard line sealed the fate of Frenline Delpha. The game was Drawkland's, their dominance reaffirmed, their clutch on the Nicholls Enterprises Conference confirmed. A truly marvelous showing by both teams, and as much as it pains us to say it, it was sad that the Anacondas had to lose after so much hard work. Perhaps their hard work will pay off further down the road in the playoffs.

FRENLINE DELPHA	3	6	6	7	22
DRAWKLAND	6	3	3	14	26

vs REPUBLIC of RAWN
After the huge win over Frenline Delpha the previous matchday, the game versus Republic of Rawn seemed like mere child's play. Which it really felt like, in a way. We can't say much about this game, as Rawn is one of those "careless" teams that we've had to face half the time, but Drawkland scored 2 touchdowns in each of the first two quarters. In the third quarter, Drawkland managed to score a safety on the Republic of Rawn in addition to 2 touchdowns in the 3rd, and scored a touchdown in addition to 3 field goals in the 4th. Republic of Rawn, however, did score a field goal in every quarter but the final one. It was ultimately a fun game to watch for the home crowd, probably not as much for those watching on TV in Rawn.

DRAWKLAND	14	14	16	16	60
REPUBLIC of RAWN	3	3	3	0	9

vs FLEURONORDICIA
Drawkland headed off to play Fleuronordicia on their home turf for the second time in their (now) 3-game matchup history together. Drawkland was going in expecting another easy win, despite the change of scenery this edition, and came back with something better: their fifth-ever shutout. 3/5 were achieved in Drawkland's second Bowl, defeating San Llera, The Fair Republic, and Caball. The next one came in XXX, against The New Telengana Rajj. Now add Fleuronordicia to that hopefully someday massively illustrious list.

Fleuronordicia was hapless, perhaps tired after all the very tiring long season of this Bowl, and especially after major losses and a guaranteed no way to qualify. They couldn't manage to get the ball into scoring range, interceptions, fumbles, turnovers of all sorts, and plaguing 3-and-Outs galore being suffered by the Fleur offense. Drawkland's offense, however, would be on fire, scoring a touchdown in the first, two field goals in the second, one of each in the third, and a touchdown scored after a safety in the fourth. Overall, a range of scores, a pick 6 and a fake field goal for a touchdown pass among the various methods of getting into the endzone for the Grid Corps. It was a hugely entertaining game ... a real shame the home Drawkian crowd couldn't experience it for themselves.

FLEURONORDICIA	0	0	0	0	0
DRAWKLAND	7	6	10	9	32

3 MATCHES TO GO
With games against Thereisnogodistan, Ethane, and Fujisawan Territories, it seems that the schedule at this point has been progressing from low to high difficulty ever since the game with Republic of Rawn, and this trend will likely continue into the playoffs, hopefully concluding with the final of the World Bowl. It's expected there to be wins for all 3 games.

We'll see then how the playoffs are set to shape up, since we have no clue how the playoffs will be distributed, but it's still going to be a tough match no matter what. But in any case, no matter the opponents, we wish good luck to the Grid Corps, as always. On Corps!

by **Free Republics** » Mon Dec 19, 2016 7:57 pm

This is your Matchday 12 Cutoff brought to you by the Church of Technicology! The Church of Technicology reminds you to visit your local Technicology Church today for a Phaeton reading and discover your true potential!

MD12 Results

All-Mart Conference

All-Mart Conference
Vettrera 0–44 Main Nation Ministry
Santaclausisgodistan 6–33 Banija
Christian Isles 3–33 Cosumar
Abaja 33–14 Somersville
The Redvale 21–33 Schottia
Royal Kingdom of Quebec 13–3 Southern Democratic States

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Schottia                     12   12   0   461  116 +345
 2 Banija                       12   10   2   452  207 +245
 3 Cosumar                      12   10   2   383  165 +218
 4 Royal Kingdom of Quebec      12   10   2   353  179 +174
 5 Abaja                        12    7   5   348  203 +145
 6 Main Nation Ministry         12    6   6   213  241  −28
 7 Southern Democratic States   12    5   7   152  216  −64
 8 The Redvale                  12    5   7   270  312  −42
 9 Santaclausisgodistan         12    4   8   198  280  −82
10 Christian Isles              12    3   9   115  380 −265
11 Somersville                  12    0  12   123  405 −282
12 Vettrera                     12    0  12    76  440 −364

RT&T Division

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Banija                       12   10   2   452  207 +245
2 Abaja                        12    7   5   348  203 +145
3 Main Nation Ministry         12    6   6   213  241  −28
4 Christian Isles              12    3   9   115  380 −265

R&K Bank Division

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Cosumar                      12   10   2   383  165 +218
2 Royal Kingdom of Quebec      12   10   2   353  179 +174
3 The Redvale                  12    5   7   270  312  −42
4 Somersville                  12    0  12   123  405 −282

FreedomCola Division

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Schottia                     12   12   0   461  116 +345
2 Southern Democratic States   12    5   7   152  216  −64
3 Santaclausisgodistan         12    4   8   198  280  −82
4 Vettrera                     12    0  12    76  440 −364

Sporting World Conference

Sporting World Conference
The Fair Republic 23–7 Qasden
Kaboomlandia 23–0 West Saintland
De Dreamland 44–0 Cumhact
Allamunnic States 53–13 Gregoryisgodistan
Kebec 84–0 Jeckland
The United States of Saints 12–31 Newmanistan

                                Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Kaboomlandia                  12   12   0   439  131 +308
 2 Allamunnic States             12   10   2   463  158 +305
 3 Gregoryisgodistan             12    9   3   320  122 +198
 4 Newmanistan                   12    8   4   431  266 +165
 5 The Fair Republic             12    8   4   327  227 +100
 6 West Saintland                12    7   5   224  168  +56
 7 The United States of Saints   12    7   5   224  216   +8
 8 Qasden                        12    4   8   213  300  −87
 9 Kebec                         12    4   8   252  341  −89
10 De Dreamland                  12    2  10   175  366 −191
11 Cumhact                       12    1  11    72  441 −369
12 Jeckland                      12    0  12    75  479 −404

RepublicSoft Division

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Allamunnic States             12   10   2   463  158 +305
2 West Saintland                12    7   5   224  168  +56
3 Qasden                        12    4   8   213  300  −87
4 De Dreamland                  12    2  10   175  366 −191

O'Reilly Organization Division

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Gregoryisgodistan             12    9   3   320  122 +198
2 The United States of Saints   12    7   5   224  216   +8
3 Kebec                         12    4   8   252  341  −89
4 Cumhact                       12    1  11    72  441 −369

Olden Division

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Kaboomlandia                  12   12   0   439  131 +308
2 Newmanistan                   12    8   4   431  266 +165
3 The Fair Republic             12    8   4   327  227 +100
4 Jeckland                      12    0  12    75  479 −404

Nicholls Enterprises Conference

Nicholls Enterprises Conference
Republic of Rawn 9–40 Fujisawan Territories
United States of Devonta 17–0 Oisinistan
Fleuronordicia 64–3 Korizland
Drawkland 41–0 Thereisnogodistan
Frenline Delpha 37–28 Ethane
Allamunnic Sporting Commission 33–15 Selvera

                                   Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Drawkland                        12   12   0   493  143 +350
 2 Frenline Delpha                  12   11   1   444  179 +265
 3 Fujisawan Territories            12    9   3   303  228  +75
 4 Ethane                           12    9   3   355   98 +257
 5 United States of Devonta         12    8   4   306  207  +99
 6 Thereisnogodistan                12    7   5   406  264 +142
 7 Allamunnic Sporting Commission   12    5   7   310  358  −48
 8 Fleuronordicia                   12    3   9   205  273  −68
 9 Oisinistan                       12    3   9   186  307 −121
10 Republic of Rawn                 12    3   9   160  390 −230
11 Selvera                          12    2  10   126  410 −284
12 Korizland                        12    0  12   103  540 −437

Bank of Acedonia Division

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Drawkland                        12   12   0   493  143 +350
2 Fujisawan Territories            12    9   3   303  228  +75
3 Fleuronordicia                   12    3   9   205  273  −68
4 Oisinistan                       12    3   9   186  307 −121

Bank of Republica Division

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Frenline Delpha                  12   11   1   444  179 +265
2 Thereisnogodistan                12    7   5   406  264 +142
3 Allamunnic Sporting Commission   12    5   7   310  358  −48
4 Korizland                        12    0  12   103  540 −437

Baseton Mutual Division

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Ethane                           12    9   3   355   98 +257
2 United States of Devonta         12    8   4   306  207  +99
3 Republic of Rawn                 12    3   9   160  390 −230
4 Selvera                          12    2  10   126  410 −284

Dixon Light Conference

Dixon Light Conference
Abanhfleft 54–3 Nassau-Hessen
Cryandolap 22–20 Smertonosnyy
Equatorial Zeldaen 34–40 West Angola
Free Republics 6–3 Chromatika
Greater Vakolicci Haven 50–0 Kosovakia
Northern Shrekistan 16–33 Firebolt

                            Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Abanhfleft                12   11   1   513  127 +386
 2 Chromatika                12   11   1   413  141 +272
 3 Nassau-Hessen             12   10   2   459  170 +289
 4 Greater Vakolicci Haven   12   10   2   457  192 +265
 5 Free Republics            12    9   3   315  144 +171
 6 Firebolt                  12    6   6   299  346  −47
 7 Equatorial Zeldaen        12    4   8   212  407 −195
 8 Cryandolap                12    3   9   203  416 −213
 9 Northern Shrekistan       12    3   9   209  420 −211
10 West Angola               12    3   9   169  361 −192
11 Kosovakia                 12    2  10   205  505 −300
12 Smertonosnyy              12    0  12   151  376 −225

New Republican Wrestling Conglomerate Division

                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Nassau-Hessen             12   10   2   459  170 +289
2 Free Republics            12    9   3   315  144 +171
3 Equatorial Zeldaen        12    4   8   212  407 −195
4 Smertonosnyy              12    0  12   151  376 −225

National Organization for Men Division

                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Chromatika                12   11   1   413  141 +272
2 Greater Vakolicci Haven   12   10   2   457  192 +265
3 Northern Shrekistan       12    3   9   209  420 −211
4 West Angola               12    3   9   169  361 −192

BearOil Division

                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Abanhfleft                12   11   1   513  127 +386
2 Firebolt                  12    6   6   299  346  −47
3 Cryandolap                12    3   9   203  416 −213
4 Kosovakia                 12    2  10   205  505 −300

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Tue Dec 20, 2016 7:53 am

The Pridnestrovian Invasion of Nordskania, Part Nine

5 miles south of Sopova
Sopova, Nordskanian Democratic People’s Republic

Once the Pridnestrovian invasion force had secured the Serpukhov-6 Fortress and turned it into their headquarters, Colonel General Vsevolod Pankavuranov had ordered the 247th Guards Armored Division and the 50th Motor Rifle Division to move towards the Serpukhov-5 Fortress in the Red Strip, which had apparently been renamed Orelgrad by Roseanne of the Blue Roses and declared the capital of the fascist State of Nordskania. The rebel state was small, occupying only the fortress and the nearby city of Sopova, and General Pankavuranov had ordered the 247th Guards Armored and the 50th Motor Rifles on the faction because new intelligence acquired by the KGB had identified Sopova as the location where a force of Anglatians were about to land and assist the Blue Roses. As the two divisions advanced upon the city, more satellite intelligence revealed that the Northern Army, the army of so-called Revolutionary Nordskania, had already arrived to support the Blue Roses as well. The 247th Guards Armored had been tasked with clearing the anarchist encampment to the south while the 50th Motor Rifles advanced straight onto the city.

Lieutenant Colonel Mstislav Vsevolodovich Pankavuranov, son of Colonel General Pankavuranov and commander of A Troop of the 247th Guards Armored would be leading the attack against the anarchists. He had over 16 tanks at his disposal as well as over 300 supporting infantrymen, and his cousin Colonel Faddey Mikhailovich Pankavuranov was also waiting in reserve with 34 tanks and 700 infantry. As his T-90M tank, callsign JADE, traversed the hills to the south of the anarchist camp, Mstislav gave his first battle order in over thirteen years. “TURTLE, SILVER SURFER, get on top of those hills and see if you can lure out their armor,” he said. The anarchists had attempted to hide their own tanks and tried to lure the Pridnestrovians into an infantry battle before surprising them with their armor, but the heat from the tank engines was very much detectable to the Pridnestrovian infrared satellites.

“On it, JADE,” the commander of the tank whose callsign was TURTLE, replied.

“Load AP,” Mstislav ordered his own crew.

“Loading AP,” Major Ivan Ivanovich Prokofiev said, and the autoloader selected an anti-personnel round and loaded it into the main gun’s chamber. “Set to bombardment mode,” Mstislav said.

“Bombardment mode set,” Prokofiev said. “So they want to surprise us with tanks, eh? Let’s see if they like our own surprise for them.”

“The airspace should be clear, Slava,” Prokofiev said to him. “The Flying Alligators are going to chew up these goddamned anarchists.”

The sound of two main guns firing from the hills reached Mstislav’s ears. “Govno!” he said. “I haven’t given them the order to fire yet! There goes our surprise now. Let’s just hope that that gets them to reveal their armor.” He then switched to the command frequency and ordered, “Troops, bombard!”

Bombardment mode was when tanks used their guns almost like artillery pieces, firing at large angles to get at their enemy. It was not as accurate as using the guns against other tanks, and the 247th Guards Armored had self-propelled artillery to do that for them, but while the artillery was still making their way through the Nordskanian countryside, the majority of the tanks would have to take up that role. As they were, the tanks were doing a good job of keeping the anarchists on their toes. The anti-personnel rounds coming from the Pridnestrovians were basically huge shotgun shells loaded with pellets. Against charging infantry, it was very much like a shotgun shell. During bombardment, the pellets came down on the enemy from above like metal rain.

“JADE, this is SILVER SURFER. We’re spotting movement in the enemy camp. Here comes their armor!”

“Don’t fire at them just yet, SILVER SURFER,” Mstislav said. “Let all of their tanks come out for the Flying Alligators to eat.”

“I count ten enemy tanks, JADE,” SILVER SURFER reported after a few minutes. “They’re setting up behind the enemy barricades.”

“Keep them occupied now that you’ve got their attention,” Mstislav said. “They’re going to make very good fodder for the Flying Alligators.”

“Roger that, JADE—“

“JADE, this is TURTLE!” the other tank on the hills shouted. “SILVER SURFER’s just been taken out by the anarchists!”

“What?” Mstislav shouted back. “How in the world did that happen?”

“The anarchists have Anglatian tanks, JADE! The fucking spanking brand new models at that! And they just got through SILVER SURFER’s armor!”

“TURTLE, don’t do anything fucking stupid!” Mstislav shouted, but he knew that that was a big ask. TURTLE and SILVER SURFER’s commanders were friends from Armor School and had survived the Spring Offensive of 2008 together. All Mstislav could hear from TURTLE now was a war cry from its commander, and then there was yet another explosion and the radio net went quiet.

“What now, Slava?” Mstislav’s driver, Captain Innokentiy Pavlovich Dybenko, asked.

”B Troop, try to flank the anarchists from the southwest,” Mstislav ordered on the command frequency. “C Troop, do the same from the southeast. A Troop, to the valleys with me. D Troop, keep up the bombardment. Let’s see what Colden’s gifts to his puppets are really capable of doing. Lower the gun, Vanya!”

“Lowering the gun,” Prokofiev repeated, making the necessary commands to the main gun.

“Load HEAT this time,” Mstislav said. If the anarchists did indeed have the latest Anglatian tanks, then he was going to need high-explosive anti-tank rounds ready and waiting for them. The rounds had been designed with a war against Abanhfleft in mind, but they should still be able to do the job against the anarchists and their Anglatian tanks, which were roughly on par with Abanhfleft’s own armor.

“Faddey, I need you to take some of your tanks and assist D Troop in the bombardment,” Mstislav said.

“They’re on their way, Slava,” Colonel Faddey Pankavuranov, Mstislav’s cousin, replied. “Hey, Slava, when are we going to taste Colden’s latest?”

“We’re going to call for you when we need it,” Mstislav said. “If you don’t hear from me or anyone else in ten minutes, come and avenge us, da?”

“Oh, don’t talk like that, Slava. You know how your Andzhela hates it when you talk pessimist—hang on a second. Yob’ tvoyu mat!”

“What? What is it?”

“The AWACS are reporting a formation of enemy jets approaching your position. They say they must be from Anglatia! Get out of there now!”

“What? How did Anglatia get planes here?” But Mstislav wasn’t able to hear Faddey’s answer because it was right at that moment that all hell broke loose. Explosions rocked the entire chassis of the tank, and Mstislav felt like his teeth were going to get rattled out of their sockets. The air also suddenly felt very hot, and he loosened the collar of his overalls because it suddenly became very difficult to breathe. Then the explosions subsided, and through the ringing in his ears, Mstislav could barely hear the telltale screams of fighter jets flying away from their strafing run, for that was what he had just experienced.

Mstislav Pankavuranov lay in a daze in his commander’s seat, aware of what was going on but not really able to do anything about it at all. Even simply breathing was a difficult task at the moment, let alone commanding a tank force. Finally, he found his own voice, and he croaked out, “Everyone okay?”

“My insides feel like jelly, Slava,” Prokofiev groaned as he retook his place behind the main gun’s targeting computer.

“What the fuck just happened!?” Dybenko shouted from the driver’s seat. His ears must still be ringing because there was no way that a tanker was going to shout inside his own tank.

“I think we just got strafed,” Mstislav slurred as he returned his earphones to their proper positions on his ears, just in time to hear his own cousin shouting, “Mstislav! Are you all right?”

“Da, da, Faddey, I’m fine,” he managed to reply.

“It’s the goddamned Anglatians, Slava,” Faddey said with venom. “They really want to die with their puppets now. They’re throwing everything they’ve got at us.”

“Never fear, Faddey,” Mstislav said as he shook the last cobwebs of disorientation out of his mind. “If they came from Anglatia then they’ve still got a long way to go before they get to Masloka, which has the nearest friendly airfield for them. They’ve already burned fuel getting here and they burned even more during their strafing run. Let our Air Force chase them down and make them crash before they land safely.” Mstislav then switched to the command frequency and said, “All units, this is JADE. Report if you are able.”

After all the surviving units had reported back to him, Mstislav was able to ascertain that he had lost four more tanks to the Anglatian strafing run, two tanks in his own troop and one tank from B and C Troop each. He now had only ten tanks left, and they were still up against ten fully armed and operational anarchist tanks. The odds were currently in the anarchists’ favor at the moment, but Mstislav still had reinforcements. “Looks like we will be needing your help after all, Faddey,” he told his cousin.

“I knew you couldn’t resist me, Slava,” Faddey said. Then, on his own command frequency, he called out, “F, G, and H Troops, on me! We will smash the anarchists and their imperialist masters!”

“Let’s get going, Kenya,” Mstislav ordered, and Dybenko got the tank on the move once again. As they made their way through the valleys between the southern hills facing the anarchist camp, Prokofiev said, “Do you hear that?”

“Hear what, Vanya? I hear nothing.”

“Exactly. The anarchists have stopped firing at us…” Prokofiev turned to face Mstislav. “They think they’ve won. And all because of that one strafing run.”

“Then let us show them the error of their ways, Vanya. Now where are my Flying Alligators?”

“We’re right behind you, Panka’s Boys; we’re just waiting for our high-flying friends to rid the skies of vermin first!”

It must have made for a very surprising sight for the anarchists: four massive and ugly helicopters hanging in the air right in front of them. But just because they were ugly didn’t mean that they didn’t pack a mean punch. The helicopters were Mil Mi-24 “Hind” helicopters, and they were the surprise that the Pridnestrovians had in store for their enemies for this battle. The Hinds’ ungainly appearance had earned them the nickname “Flying Alligators” and these particular Hinds flying in the skies above Sopova were of the tank-busting variety. The anarchists had tried to surprise the Pridnestrovians with tanks, so the Pridnestrovians surprised the anarchists with the Flying Alligators.

As with all other things, though, this surprise carried an element of risk. The Pridnestrovians were reasonably sure that the anarchists had anti-aircraft missiles with them, and helicopters were always more at risk against surface-to-air missiles than fighter jets. Still, they were hoping that the bombardment of anti-personnel shells against the anarchist camp in the early stages of the fight would destroy the missiles or at the very least kill the people who could operate them.

They need not have worried. The appearance of the Hinds took the anarchists by surprise to the extent that no one fired at least one surface-to-air missile at them. The Hinds were armed with unguided rockets, and despite their bulky and unwieldy appearance, they were actually quite agile in the air in the hands of expert pilots. And despite every nation’s efforts, the top of the tank was still the most vulnerable spot for these beasts of war, and it was just a matter of keeping themselves pointed straight and true at their targets for the Hinds to launch their rockets at the tops of the anarchists’ Anglatian tanks, and the fireworks display that the anarchists were treated to this time was just as spectacular as the one they saw on the hills to their south when the Anglatian jets bombarded the Pridnestrovian tanks and they thought that the battle was over.

Once the Hinds had expended their rockets on the tanks, they turned their attention to the infantry. Each Hind had a chin-mounted 12.7 millimeter rotating-barrel machine gun which moved with the helicopter gunner’s helmet, and strafing the shocked and unprotected infantry was almost like a turkey shoot. Soon, the anarchist camp was littered with fires, craters, and bodies of the dead and dying.

“You’re welcome, Panka’s Boys,” the pilot of the lead Hind said as he and his fellows peeled away from the fighting to return to their base at the Serpukhov-6 Fortress.

“We appreciate the help, Flying Alligators,” Mstislav Pankavuranov said back. Then, to his crew, he said, “Let’s see if there are still more surprises waiting for us.”

Mstislav’s tank advanced at the head of the column of Pridnestrovian tanks approaching the now-burning anarchist encampment. At least seven enemy tanks were burning in their positions behind the infantry barricades surrounding the camp. Two more tanks looked too damaged to do any more harm, but then some of the Pridnestrovian tanks fired at the anarchist tanks just to make sure.

“Look at this tank, Slava,” Prokofiev said as he looked through the gunner’s periscope. “I don’t think the Flying Alligators got this one.”

“Who knows? Some tanks that got taken out don’t look too damaged from the outside,” Mstislav mused.

“Let’s see if they’re really dead,” Prokofiev said, and he moved the turret so that the gun was facing the “dead” anarchist tank. As soon as he did that, the tank reversed away from the barricade, making a run for it. “Oh, no, you don’t,” Prokofiev muttered. Then, loudly, he shouted, “On the way!” and he pushed the button to fire the main gun.

The enemy tank was suddenly obscured by a cloud of smoke and sparks. Prokofiev switched to infrared mode and saw that he had managed to destroy one of the tank’s treads. “Good shot, Vanya,” Mstislav told him. “Now load another HEAT!”

The autoloader was a painfully slow mechanism, and speed was often the difference between victory and defeat for armies. The Pridnestrovian Army was already testing out a new tank which would return the human loader to the crew because studies had shown that a human loader was much faster than an autoloader. But, for the moment, both Mstislav and Prokofiev had to wait for the autoloader to do its job because their tank had been designed that way. Finally, another round was in the chamber, and Prokofiev shouted, “On the way!” as he fired it into the back of the tank.

Another cloud of smoke and sparks obscured his view of the tank, but Prokofiev already knew that this enemy was going nowhere. That should have been enough for him and for Mstislav, but somehow, it wasn’t. “Load HEAT!” Mstislav shouted, and the autoloader did its thing. Just as the round went into the chamber, someone popped out of the tank’s turret and fired the machine gun at the Pridnestrovians. The bullets sounding like rain landing on a metal roof, and it didn’t even faze Prokofiev because machine gun rounds were nothing on the T-90M’s armor. “On the way!” he shouted, and he managed to see a tongue of flame come out of the hatch where the man was firing the machine gun before more smoke and sparks obscured his view once again.

“Now we can send in the infantry,” Mstislav said. “But we have to be on our guard now. Our enemy knows our tricks now. Nothing will ever be this easy after this.”

In the skies above Sopova, it was a much different story for the Pridnestrovians than that on the ground. The MiG-35s of the Pridnestrovian Air Force had been flying in a protective ring around their Beriev A-50 AWACS when the AWACS had tracked down flights of enemy fighters coming in on Sopova from the direction of Anglatia. These jets were fully armed and ready to bring the beat down on their enemies, and before a squadron of MiGs could be redirected to Sopova, the Anglatians had already rained down hellfire on the Pridnestrovian tanks moving in on the anarchist camp to the south of the city. The MiGs did arrive in time to stop a second strafing run, and because the Anglatians had flown all the way from their country to Nordskania, they didn’t have the fuel to both engage in a dogfight and get to the airfield in Masloka, so they punched their afterburners and went for the hills. Some of the MiGs still fired missiles at the fleeing jets, and they were rewarded with the sight of one jet going up in flames and another jet crashing due to lack of fuel from evading the missile targeted at it.

Captain Pristina Leonidovna Leonova, callsign POPSTAR, watched as the identification friend or foe system (IFF) on the heads-up display (HUD) of her helmet tracked the last of the Anglatian jets before they finally flew out of range. She was not one of the pilots who had fired potshots at the fleeing jets, which meant that she still had a full payload of six Masubukin Ma-6 “Sunbeam” air-to-air missiles on her wings. Her wingman, Captain Aleksandr Aleksandrovich Aleksandrov (callsign SPACEMAN), however, had fired two missiles at the Anglatians, and it was his missile which had caused one plane to run out of fuel and crash. “Yes, that’s right, imperialist scum, run away to your puppets!” Aleksandrov called out.

“SPACEMAN, maintain radio clearance,” their wing commander said to him. “Don’t go running of your mouth again.”

“Yes, Comrade Colonel,” Aleksandrov said, not really sounding contrite, and then he switched frequencies so that he was able to talk only to Leonova, and he asked her, “So, do you think that’s the last we’ll be seeing of the Anglatians today? Or will they come back for more?”

“That’s not our job, Sasha,” Leonova replied with a sigh. “If they’re coming back, the AWACS will tell us. Now get off my frequency or else we both won’t hear from them.”

Right at that moment, their radios crackled. “All units, this is SAURON,” the AWACS communicator said. “We’re picking up more enemy activity coming in to Sopova.”

“Excellent, are we going against Anglatia’s best again?” Aleksandrov asked to himself.

“Negative, SPACEMAN. Keep yourself off the net or else you will be grounded. No, they’re not Anglatian Air Force. They look like their special forces VTOLs. This must be that division that the KGB said will arrive by air to beef up the fascists.”

“Copy that, SAURON,” the wing commander said. “We’re on it. Flight, on me.”

“SPARTAK, this is POPSTAR,” Leonova called out after a few minutes. “I see the bogeys.” The VTOLs were big, ugly, and gray. Like all other fighter pilots, Leonova had a particular dislike for any flying machine other than fighter jets, and like all fighter pilots, she preferred to fight against other fighters, but as they were at war and these were enemy planes, she was still going to take them out to the best of her ability. “Permission to engage?” she asked.

“You have it, POPSTAR,” SPARTAK replied. “And to everyone else who has eyes on, you also have permission to engage.”

“Roger that, SPARTAK,” Leonova said. Then she waited for the targeting icon on her HUD to settle on the nearest Anglatian VTOL, and then she waited a bit more before she heard the growl of the Sunbeam’s target acquisition system confirming that it had locked on the VTOL. “POPSTAR, Fox Two!” she shouted, and she fired her first missile of the war. She then fired another missile at the same VTOL just to be sure, and then she turned her attention to next VTOL in line.

“SPACEMAN, Fox Two!” Aleksandrov shouted. He fired a pair of missiles at the two VTOLs which were already nearest to landing on the ground. Both of his missiles flew straight and true towards their targets, and the first missile struck the VTOL which was still at treetop level in the port engine first. The VTOL flew like crazy on its remaining engine for a few moments before it slammed into the ground. The other missile struck the VTOL already on the ground right in the cockpit, and tongues of flame erupted through the length of the plane’s cabin. “Targets down,” he said.

The rest of the VTOLs, seeing the fate suffered by their compatriots, immediately let loose with their flares, leaving trails of smoke and light looking like angels, which had given them the name “angel flares”. “Ha-ha!” Aleksandrov shouted. “Look at those imperialists run!”

“SPACEMAN, keep the channels clear!” SPARTAK shouted back in exasperation.

“Target down,” Pristina shouted as her two missiles hit the same VTOL she had targeted earlier. Two fireballs chopped off the VTOL’s wings where the missiles had hit it, and the fuselage plummeted from the sky like an anvil and smashed into the ground below. But despite the shower of missiles, some of the VTOLs had made it safely to the ground, and they were already disgorging their loads of troops onto the ground.

Still, Aleksandrov wanted to have the last laugh. “Goodbye, puppet masters,” he said as he targeted one of the landed VTOLs. “SPACEMAN, Fox Two!” He fired his last missile, and then he announced, “I’m out.”

“Let the Army deal with the survivors, flight,” SPARTAK said. The flight of MiGs then turned back to their primary mission for the day, which was to defend their AWACS.

At the end of the day, hundreds of Pridnestrovians, Nordskanians, and Anglatians lay dead and dying in the fields of Nordskania. The war had finally turned hot, and only more from every side could die from now on, now that every side no longer wanted to back down.

by **Banija** » Tue Dec 20, 2016 10:44 am

The All-Banija Sports Magazine
The only nationwide publication that is all sports, all the time!

Despite suspensions on both sides of the football, Banija finishes 2nd 3 game road trip undefeated and officially wins their division

Zivorad Dvorak(#21) celebrates scoring a 4th quarter dagger that helped put the game away

SANTACLAUSISGODISTAN- There was a different kind of feel to this matchup. While tensions with Main Nation Ministry were at an all-time high, and people were rallying around the football team as a result, this team had to focus on what it original was- the national gridiron team- and not what it has become- the symbol of Banijan strength against unrighteous aggression from nations like the Main Nation Ministry. Dennis Zervos, however, has indeed been found, and while he did not travel to Santaclausisgodistan, the Head Coach has, in fact, confirmed that Dennis Zervos will start their big home matchup with the Royal Kingdom of Quebec, who are also 10-2 and who are also trying to improve their playoff seeding for the next round. With Banija almost guaranteed a win in their last home game against division cellar-dwellars the Christian Isles, this was their real last chance to make an impression on the critics and on the doubters, and will solidify their place as the #2 team in the All-Mart Conference, as they would have head to head wins over both Cosumar and the Royal Kingdom of Quebec.

Slawomir Kovach, for the 2nd straight week, led his team out there. The offense, however, got off to an extremely slow start. In the first half, Kovach had thrown 2 interceptions, and the game was close throughout the entirety of the 1st half. This team, of course, has been through a lot. Their quarterback going missing, military escorts to away games, etc... It's enough to shake the nerves of the most mentally strong sides. However, you do what you have to do. They went into halftime with a very slim lead, one of only 9-6. Their opponents had made two field goals from 50+ yards(51 & 54), while Banija could get to the red zone, but there was nothing they could do to get into the end zone.

In the second half, however, this team was revitalized. They outscored the hosts Santaclausisgodistan 24-0, with touchdowns on their first 3 drives, and a field goal on the next one. They got to the red zone again, but Christos Cosse decided to take over the football game. One touchdown reception of 19 yards, on a 3rd & 14 play, was the real highlight of the day, as he caught the football at the 5 yard line, juked one man out, and then plowed through a much smaller cornerback for 6 points. On the next possession, they threw him a jump ball to the corner over that same cornerback, which he leaped for and caught, to give his team a 23-6 lead to end the 3rd quarter. Zivorad Dvorak added a 12 yard touchdown run early in the 4th quarter to seal the deal.

The 4 knockout stage teams from the All-Mart Conference are set. They are Schottia(who have already clinched the #1 seed from the All-Mart Conference), Cosumar, Quebec, and Banija(who are the champions of the RT&T Division. Of course, Quebec's last two games are tough, as they must visit both Banija and Cosumar to end conference play. They will be delighted, however, that they have already clinched a playoff berth going into these two games. Banija, of course, will put all of their eggs in the basket to beat Quebec. If they defeat Quebec, and, as expected, beat up on the 3-9 Christian Isles team at home, then they will clinch the #2 seed in the All-Mart Conference. If they lose to Quebec, they will fall to 10-3, and potentially even be a lower seeded team once they get to the Free Republics. Regardless, they look to be in good shape next week as they finally return home, and as Dennis Zervos is set to make his return, his first action since the Cosumar game.

------------------------------------------
Royal Palace; 1:00 PM local time; 1 day after the Banijan-Santaclausisgodistan football game

The Core 4+1 were meeting again, and there were clearly tensions. The Core 4+1 of course were meeting again, and this time, they felt as if they needed to invite the Minister of Defense. While His Majesty the Kabaka was the Commander-In-Chief, as is any head of state worth their salt, he knew that, potentially, there was only a matter of time before something started. They decided to invite the Chief of the General Staff, Army General Otieno Adebayo, and the Minister of Defense, Masamba Zikomo. There was potentially war planning going on, and while the Kabaka wanted to avoid it, he had been doing this for long enough to understand where the headwinds were going. The Monarchy was there to resist the headwinds, but it was the eyes of the people that gave them legitimacy. If he was seen not defending the honor of his country, things could get ugly politically.

The Kabaka opened the meting. Everybody bowed to the Kabaka, then everybody with a lower rank than the Crown Prince bowed to him, and then everybody with a lower rank than Omugaba Mwanga bowed to him. This war council, made up of the reigning Monarch, two future monarchs, the Prime Minister, and the key members of his cabinet, as well as his highest ranking military officer, was an impressive group of people. The power that they projected individually was one thing. But the power that they projected as a group, was another thing entirely.

"Weird things are happening in that hellhole we call Main Nation Minsitry." Said the Kabaka. "Journalists are being murdered, and nobody knows who did them. There are terrorist attacks that are blaming our country. And did everybody read the response from General Harrington?" When the non-royals at the meeting shook their head no, he read General Harrington's letter aloud to them. The room was filled with stunned silence. "There are rumors, rumors that have been leaked to the press but have pointedly been denied. That is why, as my role as the Monarch and as Commander-In-Chief, I am directing General Adebayo to move our military readiness to DEFCON 4, with a standby to go on DEFCON 3." Nobody dared disagree with their King. Not only was he King, but he was absolutely correct.

"What kind of diplomat is this man? Who writes a letter like that to a fellow head of state?" Said the Katikkiro. "He has disrespected you,our people, our land, and our country. Our nation-state's honor is on the line. Your Majesty, pardon me, but you must do something. This is a threat."

"Your Majesty" began General Adebayo. "We are at DEFCON 4, and we will be on standby to go onto DEFCON 3. "We need to think of our men in the barracks. Do we want to start a fight? They have nuclear weapons. We know our policies against being a nuclear armed state... But if a nuclear armed state declares war on us, we may have no option but to procure them."

"General, how do we procure them? Buy them from allies like Devonta or Frenline Delpha?" Replied Kabaka Mugisha III. "We have none, and this is not a fight that I want to get into."

"Yes, that is exactly what I am saying. This is not law legislated from Parliament- it is simply a long-standing royal prerogative. By one stroke of the pen, you could reverse it and buy those arms. A nuclear deterrent is maybe what we need." Replied the General.

"Yes, OK." Said the Kabaka. "Everybody, this meeting is dismissed. Omugaba Mwanga, Isebantu Albert, please stay here. Everybody else, please leave." All the non-Royals bowed to each of the three Royals remaining individually, and then proceeded to head out the door. "My son, my grandson" Began the Kabaka. "This is what it is like to rule a Kingdom, especially over one such as ours. I am old, I am getting tired. Albert, this will be yours soon, and Mwanga, this will be yours someday. Do well to watch and learn. While you have youthful passions, when you are old like I am, you realize that nobody wins in war, and it is to be avoided wherever possible, as these are real people's lives at stake." After that, he dismissed them out of the room. He was highly stressed. He read over that letter, again and again and again. How could such a foolish and arrogant man be in charge of a country? He decided to send a letter to the General.

Code: Select all: To: General Winston Harrington What kind of diplomacy is this? Banijans do not want war- but we will fight if we must. We are not scared. We are not afraid. We are ready for anything and anybody. Any 'plans' that include military engagement will be met with an equal amount of overwhelming force. We have done nothing to anybody on your football team, nor to their friends and families. The brawl on gameday was simply a result of passions stoked by your nation- my people did what they have to do to get their people out. The deaths of any Banijan citizens definitively at the hands of the Main Nation Ministry Government shall be paid for in blood. From: Kabaka Mugisha III

------------------------------------------
Royal Palace; 9:30 AM local time; 2 days after the Banijan-Santaclausisgodistan football game

The Kabaka was in his private office, to just start the work day. He was stressed. He had just met with the Katikkiro, who was preparing to go to the Lukiiko to start a process that would kick off the draft in Banija. Of course, everybody was already registered, as every male does at the age of 18, but the Lukiiko's approval was needed to put it into effect. This was, of course, a constitutional check on the Monarch. While the Katikkiro warned that the left would use the required legislation to delay it and attempt to amend it to allow combat roles for women, the Kabaka was OK with that. More time gave more time for diplomacy, even if this General Harrington guy was absolutely nuts.

His Private Secretary then walked into the room. "Your Majesty, I think you may want to read this. It is top secret, and I believe it arrived around the same time as the letter from General Harrington, but due to prioritizing of head of state to head of state correspondence, this only made it through security this morning." The Secretary then took a huge bow, and left the room.

The Kabaka opened the letter, and read it, shocked. He immediately prioritized the leader as head of state to head of state correspondence, so this wouldn't happen again. His Secretary, of course, then explained the content of the letter to his son Albert and his grandson Mwanga, as well as the Katikkiro. Nobody else needed to know for now besides the Core 4. But, if it was possible to avoid war, he would do whatever it takes...

Code: Select all: To: The Leader Jane Doe is this terrorist? You know, I was always skeptical of the fact that a foreign government would call for this assassination. Though, if she had the backing of this General... She could have accessed state resources to get the cyanide. What you are saying makes a lot of sense. Banija has seen its fair share of coup attempts in our history, and coups generally start out the same way. Banija most certainly does not go out looking for war, but as you know, we must prepare for what is, right now, a very real possibility, and one with a likelihood that is far too high. I, and I alone, in my constitutional powers as the Kabaka, have the ability to take this country to war. And, to be fair, the assassination of a Princess who is directly in line to the throne was worse than the killing of an athlete, even if it was a superstar athlete. Dennis Zervos, interestingly enough, is refusing to talk. He says his life is at threat if he says anything, so, between you and me, we don't know what happened to Dennis, and I am not even sure if Dennis knows what happened. If you are the true leader of your country, and you want peace, then it is in Banija's best interest that we help you return to your nation. While, at this time, it would not be smart of me to leave Busukuma, you are most certainly welcomed here. If you wish to come without people noticing, we will disguise you and sneak you into the country, into the Royal Palace, to meet with myself and the rest of the Core 4(the 1st and 2nd in line to the throne, as well as the Prime Minister). I urge you to take the offer and come to Busukuma. This may be our last chance at peace. From: Kabaka Mugisha III

by **Ethane** » Tue Dec 20, 2016 12:32 pm

Day 1 - My Holiday Abroad (loosely based off real life)

It is the first day off on my holiday. I was so excited. I had been waiting for this holiday for over a year now, and had saved up a fair chunk of my pocket money so I could have plenty of money while away. I heard of this thing through my school, and decided immediately that I wished to do this amazing thing. I have come to stay in Eshan, with a family who live here (although I hadn't really spoken with them much until I reached there, and had forgotten their names but managed to let it slide unnoticed, which they told me in the email they sent me to welcome me). After the week with the host family, I will be going to stay in a 'camp' with a load of other people from around the world who are my age, which will be fun. We will be going around to see amazing sights in Eshan, and having fun with other people, who I hope will become my friends for life. I really hope they will be friendly when I meet them in a week.

The host family is amazing though. They met me at the airport and bought me one of the Space Cakes, which are absolutely mouthwatering. We need them in Ethane! They were so big, and so delicious, and I think they could tell I liked it. Its just so much better than Ethanese food. Seriously. They then drove me to their home, which was about 1 hour away from the airport in Sebio. They lived in a town called Tamariz which had a great historical heritage and an old church, which I would make sure to check out.

Getting to Eshan was rather interesting. You see, it was my first time on a plane, and I can officially now say I hate flying in planes. It just feels so unnatural, and being in turbulence is just horrible. Anyway, I arrived in at the host family's house, and it was large and beautiful. It had a very different architectural design to Ethanese house designs, and it was beautiful. I went inside, and it was so roomy and spacious inside as well. They showed me my room, which was relatively roomy, and had a nice and comfortable bed for me to sleep on.

Within an hour, we were going to the swimming pool. They had club membership at a swimming pool club which overlooked the cliff, so the views would be beautiful and it would be a nice place to go swimming. We turned up, and the views over the sea were stunning. But we never actually did much swimming. We spent a little time in the swimming pool, before we (me and my two host brothers) ended up running up to play some football with their friends, who were quite good. They tried to quiz me on Echani football, but I wasn't very good at naming their players. Afterwards, we spent about 10 minutes in the swimming pool before it was time to go again.

We had a nice meal, but then it was time for a football match. I ended up falling asleep for the first half, but sat and watched the second half with the two host brothers and some friends they brought over. They honestly loved football, and I thought maybe they went a little ott, but they were certainly passionate, especially when Eshan scored. It was a beautiful game, except for when I got grabbed from behind as the host brothers got overexcited, and jumped about in celebration. And then, now I am so tired. I think I'm going to go to sleep. I've had a long day - I got up at 3am this morning to get to the airport in Ethane, so I need some sleep to prepare me for my time in Eshan, and adjust to the time zone of this country. I love Eshan already though, and the people are nice and friendly.

by **Main Nation Ministry** » Tue Dec 20, 2016 3:00 pm

Tipping Point

The General was at the presidential building where the Leader worked. He was walking to the Leader's office to try to get access to the nuclear weapons. When he tried to open the office door where the Leader worked, it was electronically locked and required a password. "A password? No..No no no no! I knew he didn't let it in plain sight!" the General said as he slammed his fist into the wall.

Heading back to his office, where the amount of empty nasal bottles everywhere intensify to covering all of the carpet. He started making phone calls to certain people while laying on a pile of nasal bottles. "How can I help you, General?" "Are All-Banija Sports Magazine still being burned in the bonfire where they belong?" "No, sir. We ran out of copies to burn. We would have to buy more copies." "No thanks, I just need to think some things that's all." He hangs up the phone and starts pacing the room while he had to raise his legs to maneuver on the nasal bottle ground.

He opened the package again to get a nasal bottle as usual and sniffs it. "Why aren't the ideas appearing?" the General said as he repeatedly uses the nasal bottle to try to get ideas, but nothing was happening. "Don't stop....I need you."

Meanwhile...

The fan was back at home, relaxing to the video of Main Nation Ministry and Banija fighting on the football stadium. She was going to make sure that the football stadium was going to be a battlefield, sooner or later. She already crafted something else to fuel tensions. She made a different kind of package directed to The Truth News. They were getting a bit too close to the truth, so the package would arrive till the next match day.

Wicked Hope

Busukma, Banija

It wasn't easy sneaking into Banija. They didn't use the private jet they always used to get to places. The other hard part was having to hide the Leader in the trunk of the limo. "Ok, so the palace is on this part of Banija...here." said one of the bodyguards who had a map in his face. The second bodyguard was driving the limo, while the other two were looking out through windows, in case someone shot at them. "So where is Jane Doe now?" said the bodyguard driving. "Most likely in Main Nation Ministry, the cyanide could have simply been stolen." the body guard checking the windows on the left side of the windows.

"Hang on, we're here." the driver said as the limo pulled up to the Royal Palace. "Get him out of the trunk." The bodyguards opened the truck where the annoyed Leader was straightening his suit. "You could have simply disguised me as a tourist, do you people realize the lack of air that was in there?! Well, no matter. Knock on the door." A bodyguard knocked on the door, where a maid answered it.

"Hello, miss? We are here to have a meeting with Mr. Kabaka Mugisha III over concerns of war. Allow me to introduce myself. I'm the Leader of Main Nation Ministry."

(OOC Note: Since the image I trying to use keeps messing up, I simply post a link to the picture of what the Leader looks like. Image is here. )

by **Kaboomlandia** » Tue Dec 20, 2016 6:13 pm

A Look Back: The Greatest Kaboomlandian Teams Ever

The Kaboomlandian national gridiron team has been a total juggernaut this cycle, but can they be considered one of the all-time great Kaboomlandian teams in any sport after this cycle? Let's take a look at the current best-ever teams and let you make the decision yourself.

#1: Kaboomlandian National Ice Hockey Team, World Cup of Hockey XXX

Let's get real: nobody expected this team to do much of anything except making the playoffs, starting the tournament in 16th place. However, this squad showed what they were made of when the playoffs came around. When they were in overtime of Game 2 of the Round of 16 against Nephara, Tyler Martin, who'd been quiet for much of the tournament, scored a beautiful OT winner, and two days later Tyson Nash was the unlikely hero in Game 3. The Cinderella squad made it to the semifinals, where the magic ended with 25 goals against in four straight losses. This squad is also notable because of the surge of the Kid Line of Zack Murray, Bryson Martin and Kennedy Linden, even bumping the previous top line of Tyler Martin, Adrian Philips and Darryl Rutherford to the second unit. The Phoenix will look to break through in the 32nd World Cup of Hockey when it begins in a few weeks. Perhaps this will be the cycle that Kaboomlandia will finally win a game against one of the Big Three of Valanora, Elejamie or The Royal Kingdom of Quebec.

#2: Offside Wins Games, World Cup 76

This was another game where the Kaboomlandian team was clearly greater than the sum of their parts. Despite having just one legitimate scoring threat in Rene Allard, the team's staunch defense took them to six straight shutouts down the stretch and a playoff match with the mighty Eurans. And the Phoenix held them to a pair of 1-0 losses despite being completely outclassed. Since Ryan White has moved on, this team has transitioned into a more offensive variation while still maintaining the same fundamental of the offside trap in the 4-5-1 formation. The 1-8-1 formation that White pioneered has become known as one of the most infuriating defensive formations in football today.

#3: The Quarterfinal Run, World Bowl XXVII

This Kings team (remember, this was only a week before King Wulfric II came to power) came closer than any other Phoenix team to World Bowl success. All that ruined it was one measly gust of wind that blew Caleb McCallum's last-second field goal attempt in the quarterfinals wide to lose 30-29 to Ko-oren. After going 8-2 in the group stage (seriously, why does Kaboomlandia keep doing that?), the team proved what they were made of when they knocked off their old rivals Timbermunich 36-20 in the Round of 16 to set a high-water mark for Kaboomlandian football. And they pushed the higher-seeded Unionites all the way to the limit. If that kick was three feet to the left, Kaboomlandia would have gone off to the semifinals.

Back to the present, the current Phoenix squad is playing incredibly well. After a shocking 6-3 loss by Chromatika, the Phoenix are one of only three undefeated teams left in the tournament and are third in the entire World Bowl for point differential at +308. Going into a fairly easy game at conference doormats Cumhact, the team has another chance to make Kaboomlandian history: if they win, it will be the first-ever World Bowl team from Kaboomlandia not to lose at least two group-stage games. This team's legacy will ultimately be dependent on its playoff run; going out in the Round of 16 will completely erase their name from history even if the Phoenix should go 14-0.

by **Free Republics** » Tue Dec 20, 2016 7:53 pm

This is your Matchday 13 Cutoff brought to you by Nicholls Enterprises! Nicholls Enterprises: If you can think of it, we probably make it!

MD13 Results

All-Mart Conference

All-Mart Conference
Schottia 58–7 Abaja
Southern Democratic States 30–7 Christian Isles
Banija 40–24 Royal Kingdom of Quebec
Main Nation Ministry 51–21 The Redvale
Somersville 25–22 Vettrera
Cosumar 41–6 Santaclausisgodistan

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Schottia                     13   13   0   519  123 +396
 2 Banija                       13   11   2   492  231 +261
 3 Cosumar                      13   11   2   424  171 +253
 4 Royal Kingdom of Quebec      13   10   3   377  219 +158
 5 Abaja                        13    7   6   355  261  +94
 6 Main Nation Ministry         13    7   6   264  262   +2
 7 Southern Democratic States   13    6   7   182  223  −41
 8 The Redvale                  13    5   8   291  363  −72
 9 Santaclausisgodistan         13    4   9   204  321 −117
10 Christian Isles              13    3  10   122  410 −288
11 Somersville                  13    1  12   148  427 −279
12 Vettrera                     13    0  13    98  465 −367

RT&T Division

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Banija                       13   11   2   492  231 +261
2 Abaja                        13    7   6   355  261  +94
3 Main Nation Ministry         13    7   6   264  262   +2
4 Christian Isles              13    3  10   122  410 −288

R&K Bank Division

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Cosumar                      13   11   2   424  171 +253
2 Royal Kingdom of Quebec      13   10   3   377  219 +158
3 The Redvale                  13    5   8   291  363  −72
4 Somersville                  13    1  12   148  427 −279

FreedomCola Division

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Schottia                     13   13   0   519  123 +396
2 Southern Democratic States   13    6   7   182  223  −41
3 Santaclausisgodistan         13    4   9   204  321 −117
4 Vettrera                     13    0  13    98  465 −367

Sporting World Conference

Sporting World Conference
Jeckland 0–31 Allamunnic States
Newmanistan 29–13 De Dreamland
West Saintland 54–3 The United States of Saints
Qasden 37–9 Kebec
Gregoryisgodistan 26–0 The Fair Republic
Cumhact 7–44 Kaboomlandia

                                Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Kaboomlandia                  13   13   0   483  138 +345
 2 Allamunnic States             13   11   2   494  158 +336
 3 Gregoryisgodistan             13   10   3   346  122 +224
 4 Newmanistan                   13    9   4   460  279 +181
 5 The Fair Republic             13    8   5   327  253  +74
 6 West Saintland                13    8   5   278  171 +107
 7 The United States of Saints   13    7   6   227  270  −43
 8 Qasden                        13    5   8   250  309  −59
 9 Kebec                         13    4   9   261  378 −117
10 De Dreamland                  13    2  11   188  395 −207
11 Cumhact                       13    1  12    79  485 −406
12 Jeckland                      13    0  13    75  510 −435

RepublicSoft Division

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Allamunnic States             13   11   2   494  158 +336
2 West Saintland                13    8   5   278  171 +107
3 Qasden                        13    5   8   250  309  −59
4 De Dreamland                  13    2  11   188  395 −207

O'Reilly Organization Division

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Gregoryisgodistan             13   10   3   346  122 +224
2 The United States of Saints   13    7   6   227  270  −43
3 Kebec                         13    4   9   261  378 −117
4 Cumhact                       13    1  12    79  485 −406

Olden Division

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Kaboomlandia                  13   13   0   483  138 +345
2 Newmanistan                   13    9   4   460  279 +181
3 The Fair Republic             13    8   5   327  253  +74
4 Jeckland                      13    0  13    75  510 −435

Nicholls Enterprises Conference

Nicholls Enterprises Conference
Ethane 21–23 Drawkland
Selvera 13–53 Fleuronordicia
Oisinistan 14–24 Allamunnic Sporting Commission
Fujisawan Territories 16–22 Frenline Delpha
Thereisnogodistan 57–13 Republic of Rawn
Korizland 19–29 United States of Devonta

                                   Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Drawkland                        13   13   0   516  164 +352
 2 Frenline Delpha                  13   12   1   466  195 +271
 3 Fujisawan Territories            13    9   4   319  250  +69
 4 Ethane                           13    9   4   376  121 +255
 5 United States of Devonta         13    9   4   335  226 +109
 6 Thereisnogodistan                13    8   5   463  277 +186
 7 Allamunnic Sporting Commission   13    6   7   334  372  −38
 8 Fleuronordicia                   13    4   9   258  286  −28
 9 Oisinistan                       13    3  10   200  331 −131
10 Republic of Rawn                 13    3  10   173  447 −274
11 Selvera                          13    2  11   139  463 −324
12 Korizland                        13    0  13   122  569 −447

Bank of Acedonia Division

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Drawkland                        13   13   0   516  164 +352
2 Fujisawan Territories            13    9   4   319  250  +69
3 Fleuronordicia                   13    4   9   258  286  −28
4 Oisinistan                       13    3  10   200  331 −131

Bank of Republica Division

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Frenline Delpha                  13   12   1   466  195 +271
2 Thereisnogodistan                13    8   5   463  277 +186
3 Allamunnic Sporting Commission   13    6   7   334  372  −38
4 Korizland                        13    0  13   122  569 −447

Baseton Mutual Division

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Ethane                           13    9   4   376  121 +255
2 United States of Devonta         13    9   4   335  226 +109
3 Republic of Rawn                 13    3  10   173  447 −274
4 Selvera                          13    2  11   139  463 −324

Dixon Light Conference

Dixon Light Conference
Kosovakia 0–23 Free Republics
Firebolt 36–13 Equatorial Zeldaen
Smertonosnyy 47–23 Northern Shrekistan
Nassau-Hessen 36–14 Greater Vakolicci Haven
Chromatika 13–17 Abanhfleft
West Angola 6–3 Cryandolap

                            Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Abanhfleft                13   12   1   530  140 +390
 2 Chromatika                13   11   2   426  158 +268
 3 Nassau-Hessen             13   11   2   495  184 +311
 4 Greater Vakolicci Haven   13   10   3   471  228 +243
 5 Free Republics            13   10   3   338  144 +194
 6 Firebolt                  13    7   6   335  359  −24
 7 West Angola               13    4   9   175  364 −189
 8 Equatorial Zeldaen        13    4   9   225  443 −218
 9 Cryandolap                13    3  10   206  422 −216
10 Northern Shrekistan       13    3  10   232  467 −235
11 Kosovakia                 13    2  11   205  528 −323
12 Smertonosnyy              13    1  12   198  399 −201

New Republican Wrestling Conglomerate Division

                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Nassau-Hessen             13   11   2   495  184 +311
2 Free Republics            13   10   3   338  144 +194
3 Equatorial Zeldaen        13    4   9   225  443 −218
4 Smertonosnyy              13    1  12   198  399 −201

National Organization for Men Division

                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Chromatika                13   11   2   426  158 +268
2 Greater Vakolicci Haven   13   10   3   471  228 +243
3 West Angola               13    4   9   175  364 −189
4 Northern Shrekistan       13    3  10   232  467 −235

BearOil Division

                           Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Abanhfleft                13   12   1   530  140 +390
2 Firebolt                  13    7   6   335  359  −24
3 Cryandolap                13    3  10   206  422 −216
4 Kosovakia                 13    2  11   205  528 −323

by **Kaboomlandia** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 6:17 am

Phoenix lock up Sporting World conference with 44-7 victory

It was a good night for the Kaboomlandian national gridiron team, as a 44-7 thrashing of unranked Cumhact clinched the top spot in the Sporting World conference as well as a guaranteed top-three seed when it comes time to determine playoff seeds. Travis Reuben started the game and threw for 328 yards and four touchdown passes in a full game of work. While the reasoning for leaving Reuben in against an outclassed opponent might seem sinister, head coach Kevin Nivek explained: "We left Travis in because the game against Newmanistan doesn't mean anything and we want to rest him for the playoffs." In addition, backup running back Pauly Anderson will start instead of Andrew Michaels. "We still can't underestimate Newmanistan because they're still hungry for their own playoff hopes and they'll come out strong." Resting the starters is nothing new; Nivek did it against Jeckland to rest his stars up for Gregoryisgodistan.

Is Travis Reuben an all-world quarterback?

There's no doubt that Travis Reuben has been unbelievable in this World Bowl. One need only to look at the Phoenix' 483 points in 13 games to prove how astute the newly promoted starter is in his play-calling. But the burning question around Reuben is: is he one of the best quarterbacks in the world? One can't simply look at one tournament of work and make a decision, so we need to go beyond the surface to answer this question. "I feel like Reuben's really helped the receivers with their game. If you have that great QB behind centre you can just go run your route and not have to worry about the throw quality," commented Manny Hayes. Others also commented on his awareness at the line, saying, "What makes Travis really good is that he's not just an arm, but he can pick out those holes in the defense and change his plan on the fly, executing almost every time." Reuben has been noted for his tendency to call a lot of audibles at the line if he spots something, and this has helped his game.

It's too early to tell what the playoff matchups will look like, but if the backups can defeat Newmanistan and Fujisawan Territories can defeat Drawkland, the Phoenix might move up a spot to 2nd place overall.

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 8:10 am

A Tale of Two Brothers, Part Seven

Vitaly Zima suddenly woke up from a dreamless sleep.

Vitaly rubbed away the grime that had collected in the corners of his eyes, and he felt around for his alarm clock to turn it off before he realized that it was not even ringing. It was just seven o’clock in the morning, two hours before he was supposed to wake up today. Today was a free day: everyone was free to do whatever they wanted as long as they were back in training once again tomorrow. Vitaly had planned on just staying at his own apartment, which had been provided to him by the club once the new apartment block that their new investor, the actor Julian Markovsky, had gladly constructed for them was finally finished and watch whatever football was going on, which was the Baptism of Fire. He just hoped that he wouldn’t catch a match with Revolutionary Nordskania on it as he was not really in the mood watch his own twin brother.

Vitaly looked around for whatever it was that had woken him up. It certainly wasn’t anything inside his apartment. Was someone trying to break in? There seemed to be some kind of incessant tapping noise coming from somewhere in his apartment. Vitaly reached for the baseball bat under his bed and carefully got up, keeping his steps light and quiet as he tried to get the jump on the intruder.

But as he got out of his bedroom, Vitaly realized that there was no intruder at all. Someone was knocking on his door, and it sounded like they had been knocking on it for some time already. Vitaly put his bat back on his bed and walked up to the door. “Who is it?” he asked.

“It’s Mari,” Marissa Bures called out. “Please, Vitaly, just let me in!”

Vitaly unlocked the door and opened it, and he was surprised to find that Marissa had already flung her arms at him and was now crying into his chest. “Mari! What’s going on?” Vitaly asked. “Why are you crying?”

“He did it, Vitaly,” Marissa replied through her sobs. “He finally broke up with me!”

“Who broke up with you? Arkadi? He really broke up with you?”

“Remember last night when I said that I was going to test him? Well, he’s made his choice, and it’s over between us!”

Vitaly delicately extracted himself from Marissa’s tearful embrace. “Look, Mari, why don’t we sit down and talk about this?” he asked softly. He led Marissa to his couch and sat down beside her. “Let me get this straight, Mari: so Arkadi broke up with you?”

Marissa nodded. “I mean, it would’ve been okay if he just dumped me right then and there, but no, he had to have the last word, the last laugh. Do you know what he fucking called me when he replied to me?”

Vitaly shook his head. “No. What did he call you?”

“He called me a gold digger, Vitaly! A fucking gold digger!” Marissa covered her face and cried once again.

“He didn’t!” Vitaly didn’t think that his own brother could be that heartless.

“Yes, he did,” Marissa said tearfully. “Check his social media if you want proof.”

Vitaly took his smartphone and accessed the social media app. He searched for Arkadi’s account, and as he did that, he noticed that “gold digger” was one of the site’s trending topics. Finally, he got Arkadi’s official account, and he scrolled down to look at his latest tweets, and that was when he saw what Marissa was talking about. “Is this for real?” he asked once he was finished reading. Marissa didn’t even speak; she just nodded her head.

Right then and there, Vitaly made up his mind to tell Arkadi just what exactly he thought of him, but as he looked at the replies that other netizens had made to Arkadi’s tweet, he saw that a lot of people were on the same wavelength as he was. The people thought that Arkadi had no right to call Marissa a gold digger after he himself had asked to be the highest paid player of his new club along with a mansion, a sports car, and a supermodel girlfriend even though he already had a new girlfriend lined up in Natalia Kotov. Arkadi Zima was very much the villain in the eyes of the Fleftic people, and he seemed to be enjoying it.

Vitaly also noticed that as soon as Arkadi had broken up with Marissa online, he flooded his accounts with pictures of him and Natalia together. This was a remarkable change from when Arkadi and Marissa were still together. Arkadi barely posted anything with both him and Mari even as he had once boasted of his “infinite love” for her. And although Vitaly was sure that his hindsight was being colored by his current perception of his own brother, he felt pretty sure that Arkadi had never really loved Marissa even before he had gone off to Nordskania and met Natalia.

Vitaly set aside his phone and faced Marissa. “Look, Mari, fuck Arkadi,” he said. “Forget about him. He’s already forgotten about you and moved on with his Nordskanian girl. You should do the same. Move on. Celebrate being single again. Find someone who really deserves your love. He’s not worth crying over, especially now that he’s done what he’s done.”

“And how do you suppose I should do that?” Mari asked heatedly. “Should I go back to the army, fight in Mezaladbyi or Verbergerkinnh and find myself my own soldier boyfriend?”

“No, of course not, Mari,” Vitaly said, and he couldn’t help but crack a small grin.

“What’s so funny, Vitaly?” Marissa asked. “You think a girl crying over her ex-boyfriend is funny?”

“No, it’s not that. It’s just that I find the sight of you in fatigues and holding a rifle and kissing some soldier guy very funny. That’s why I’m grinning. Tell you what, why don’t we go out for a walk or some drinks? You can do whatever you want, Mari. I’ll just be behind you like a dog. I’ll keep you company so that you don’t do anything stupid now that you’re a free girl again.”

“Right now, I just want a cup of coffee,” Marissa said.

“Coffee? Are you sure about that?” Vitaly asked warily. “You do remember that you get palpitations when you drink coffee.”

“It’s just one cup, Vitaly. What can one cup of coffee do to me?”

“Look, Mari, I know that you’re heartbroken right now, but that’s no reason for you to kill yourself.”

“Vitaly, if I wanted to kill myself, I wouldn’t be doing it by drinking coffee.”

“I just don’t want you dying because of my good-for-nothing brother.”

“And I’m not going to. Can you just make me some coffee, please? Just one cup, and if I want more, you’ve got my permission to stop me with whatever it takes. Please, Vitaly.”

“All right, if that’s what you want,” Vitaly conceded, and he stood up to make the coffee in his kitchen. “How do you want your coffee, Mari?” he asked. “Do you like it blended or anything in particular in it?”

“Just make it like you make yours,” Marissa replied as she wiped her tears away. Soon, Vitaly came back into the living room holding two mugs of coffee. “I’m a softie when it comes to coffee,” he said as he laid down the mugs on his table, “so it may not be as strong as you like.”

Marissa took the cup nearest to hers and sipped. “Wow, that is very mild,” she said. “What flavor is it?”

“Chocolate mocha instant coffee,” Vitaly said as he drank from his cup. “Do you want some pandesal with that? It is still breakfast, after all.”

“No thanks. I just want the coffee.” Soon both Marissa and Vitaly were drinking their coffee in silence, keeping their thoughts to themselves. Vitaly himself was thinking about how unlucky Marissa had been. Out of all the guys she could have fallen for, she had to fall for the one who loved another country so much he was willing to run away to fight for it. The fact that Arkadi found someone he really loved over in Nordskania was probably a very lovely bonus for the fucker, Vitaly mused. Marissa had hated war and conflict ever since her family had been forced to flee their native Riuwiee for Markovsky during the Holy Catholic Revolution of 2008, and she had lost family members during that revolution. She hated to think about what Arkadi was doing for the Nordskanian revolution when he was fighting over there, but she didn’t really dwell on the possibility that he could have found someone else until very recently, and look how that turned out.

“You know, Vitaly, I’ve always accepted that he loved Nordskania more than he loved me,” Marissa said suddenly, causing Vitaly to nearly drop his mug. “Arkadi loved more than anything else, really. But I never imagined that we would end like this, with him parading his new Nordskanian girlfriend around while I’m sitting here drinking coffee and talking to his brother who is nothing like him at all. It’s just a strange feeling, but it’s the card I’ve been dealt by fate, and who am I to fight it?”

“Well, we certainly can’t deny that Arkadi thinks nothing of you now,” Vitaly said, “but it’s not your fate to cry over him now that he’s gone. He’s not worth crying over, I already told you before. Find someone else whom you love and who loves you back. That’s your real fate, Mari. But I’m not saying that you should go find that person right now. You deserve the time to get over your loss at your own pace. You deserve that much right now.”

“I know that, Vitaly,” Marissa said. “It’s just that I can’t help but remember the things that he did and didn’t do. Like this, for instance. Never when we were together did he bother to make me so much as a single cup of coffee. No one knew about my palpitations back then, of course, but Arkadi never bothered to ask me about wanting some coffee, and when I did say that I wanted some coffee, he would just tell me to go to the coffee machine and make myself some.”

“Hah,” Vitaly said. “That sounds like typical Arkadi.”

Marissa suddenly laid down her cup on the table. “Now I feel like I’m in the mood to walk. Do you want to walk with me, Vitaly?”

“Sure, of course. Just let me get dressed and then let’s walk.”

Dressing up for Vitaly today meant throwing on a pair of pants over his boxer shorts and switching his fluffy slippers for some sandals, and soon he and Marissa were walking down the road from the apartments to the Landmark Stadium, the home ground of Imperial Markovsky Football Club. “There’s nothing like a walk down the road to clear your mind, isn’t it?” Marissa asked as they walked past the stadium and into the nearby Markovsky People’s Park.

“It sure is,” Vitaly muttered as he stuffed his hands into his pants pockets. He had forgotten that early mornings in Markovsky were as cold as hell frozen over. He wished he’d taken his robe as well for this walk. “Isn’t it a little bit cold out here?” he asked.

“Must be,” Mari muttered, her mind on something else entirely. “You never really notice when your life just got a lot colder because someone you love left you for someone else and someplace else. Oh, man, People’s Park brings back a lot of memories… Oh, yeah, I think it was that spot where Arkadi and I had our first kiss, over there by that birch. And over there, I think, is the spot where he first went to second base with me… God, Vitaly, look at me!” she suddenly said. “I’ve become a sentimental mess! This isn’t what’s supposed to happen! Let’s get out of here, Vitaly. People’s Park reminds me so much of Arkadi.”

“Sure,” Vitaly said. “Where do you want to go?”

“Anywhere except for here.”

“Your wish is my command. I know a place where we can crash if you’d like.”

“Sure! Let’s go there.”

by **Fujisawan Territories** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 9:20 am

The Hoji Metropolitan Daily Record

Go for broke: Fujisawan Territories all in against Drawkland

The final game of the group stage is shaping up to be a true classic. It has all the ingredients of the type of game that Territorials will remember for generations. The playoff picture will be monumentally affected by the outcome of this game, one way or another. If the Hurricane win, they will qualify for the playoffs with the wildcard spot. If they lose to Drawkland, United States of Devonta is in. If the Territories win, Drawkland's playoff seeding could also potentially suffer. For these reasons, tonight's game is easily one of the most important games of this matchday and probably the season. Because the Hurricane came close, but squandered multiple opportunities to beat Frenline Delpha, the Hurricane is on the verge of missing playoff action despite winning nine of fourteen games after a twenty year hiatus from international gridiron.

"I couldn't think of a better team to lose to and end the season," Coach Urogataya told reporters in last night's press conference at Crosscom, the last of the season at home. He was referring to Drawkland, whose chances to win are almost lock tight. "If there's one team out there that commands our absolute respect, it's them. If we lose tomorrow night, it's because it just wasn't meant to be, and we as Fujisawans living on the most beautiful islands in the world, should count our blessings."

For the coaching staff and players, the season is a smashing success regardless of a win or loss against Drawkland. The entire sports editorial board at the Daily Record can easily imagine Hojiwood screenwriters duking it out for the rights to make a movie about the Fujisawan Territories' return to international gridiron football. And for now, the ending hasn't yet been written.

It would be a shame to spoil Drawkland's perfect season (and it has been perfect), but it's the only road left for the Hurricane to get into the post season. What the Territories did in getting head to head tiebreakers against all the teams they needed to is amazing, but it's all for naught if they can't close the deal against Drawkland. This kind of scenario is why we love football. Football is played for games like this. With everything on the line, the Territories will give their best effort, and we'll all have to patiently wait and see if it's playoff worthy.

There was an end of the season party at the Crosscom Global Arena open to the public following the Frenline Deplha game. The mood was somber following the 22-16 loss but the packed house was there to celebrate a return to football on the world stage. A return to the Crosscom Global Arena. The return of the nation's economy from the brink of annihilation, that allowed this stadium to be built and this team to compete.

Gone from the Waterfront District, Ocean View, Magiku, West Atlantis, Lemurian Heights, the Territorial Coastline, and so many parts of the Hoji metropolitan area, are the mile long bread lines. In its place are warm, friendly smiles. And this year, finally, Christmas shoppers. There are no longer soldiers patrolling the streets, chasing away the starving and the homeless in the Financial District. New shops and restaurants have replaced the vacant blight.

This year, Hurricane Season was not just about football. It was about hope, too. Hoji in the Fujisawan language translates to "heart." And the City of Hearts is back and more alive than ever. The centerpiece of the revival is the new Crosscom Global Arena, and this team from the seven islands of the Fujisawan Territories in our small corner of the world. If this is not a signal that the Territories' future is bright and full of potential, I don't know what is.

At the season wrap up party, there were plenty of legendary faces among the crowd. Former Hurricane head coach Rai Lo and family were there. Territorial Hall of Fame wide receiver Oribaha "Baja" Hini was likewise there. His World Bowl VII championship ring seemed to glisten as he graciously met with fans and signed autographs.

"This team reminds me of the World Bowl VII team. The Cinderella run, beating other teams we never should have. Very scrappy, lots of energy. The camaraderie on this team is just awe inspiring to watch," Coach Lo remarked at the event.

Lost in all the talk about making the playoffs (or not), the last home game at Crosscom Global Arena this year and whether the Hurricane could beat Drawkland on the road, was the fact that defensive coordinator Tetsuya Tsuchie's contract was extended for two more World Bowl cycles. He has done a tremendous job this year. It is both exciting and eerie to say that I honestly think that the defense this year was the best we have ever seen on a Hurricane team. We met our goal of staying competitive in every game (almost) and great defensive stands won big games. We beat some highly ranked teams as an unranked, and it's in no small part thanks to the defense. He also earned a ¥500,000 bonus check and a contract escalator for a pay raise next season.

Mae Yamamoto, the sole female coach in the Territorial Gridiron Football League, who is serving as the special teams coordinator for this World Bowl season, earned a one year contract extension. Torazo Yogi has been an exceptional place kicker with the guidance of Yamamoto. The daughter of former Tijuku Thunder head coach Hideki Yamamoto, Mae is seen more as a sister to the players on special teams than a coach. She is a peer, a mentor. It's this familial bond that she has with her players that makes her so valuable and special as a coach.

Offensive coordinator Toshikazu Sakiyurai won't receive a contract extension. He also won't be fired, either. He had a very difficult task running a high powered offense that has plenty of star potential but that is oft lacking in discipline. He also had to engineer a couple of come from behind wins.

Win or lose, it should be a great game against Drawkland. Defending a world championship is a humbling experience. Kudos to Drawkland for the season they've put together so far. If they repeat, it's well deserved. The fate of a season will be decided over the course of sixty minutes. The consequences will change the playoff map one way or another. One thing is for sure. Whether our season ends tonight or somewhere in the playoffs, football is back in the Territories.

by **Southern Democratic States** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 2:36 pm

The Southerners beats the Christian Isles

The Bears received the Christian Isles at home in a sold out Tiger Stadium in Rockingham, Chattahoochee and beat them 30–7. The Southerners are done for the playoffs because it's the top 4 teams who made them, and not the top 6.

The Christian Isles started with the ball, but after only getting one first downs, they had to punt. On their next drive, the Southerners scored a 18 yards passing touchdown when Clifford Jenkins' pass was caught by Demarcus Woods into the endzone. Then, the Southern Bears added 3 more points on a field goal by Crockett Burkhead. The Bears scored another touchdown, on a 5 yards run by Coconut Riddick, and made another field goal before the end of the 2nd quarter. The score was 20–0 at the halftime.

In the 3rd quarter, the Southerners recieved the kickoff but, after getting two first downs, they had to punt. Christian Isles didn't do much better on offense and they also had to punt. Punter punts the ball and Dwayne Boyd tries to catch it but it slips away from his hands. Christian Isles' gunner recovers the ball at the 17 yards line in Southern territory. On a first and 10, Quarterback #11 passes to Wide Receiver #81 for a 17 yards touchdown. The Southern Bears followed with a 3 yards touchdown by Coconut Riddick on a 8 minute long drive. The Bears added added another field goal in the 4th quarter and the final score was 30–7.

The Southerners are 7th in the conference standings, 4 wins away from Québec, so they're gonna miss the playoffs. The last game of the regular season is at home against Santaclausisgodistan.

Southern Democratic States   10   10    7    3   –   30
Christian Isles               0    0    7    0   –    7

BOXSCORE
1st quarter
10:48 Touchdown by Demarcus Woods (18 yards pass from Clifford Jenkins) extra point by Crockett Burkhead good
5:22 Field Goal by Crockett Burkhead (33 yards)
2nd quarter
11:18 Touchdown by Coconut Riddick (5 yards run) extra point by Crockett Burkhead good
2:43 Field Goal by Crockett Burkhead (51 yards)
3rd quarter
12:26 Touchdown by Wide Reciever #81 (17 yards pass from Quarterback #11) extra point by Kicker #2
4:03 Touchdown by Coconut Riddick (3 yards run) extra point by Crockett Burkhead good
4th quarter
4:45 Field Goal by Crockett Burkhead (29 yards)

A huge christmas party for the final game of the regular season against Santaclausisgodistan

The Southern Democratic States' National Team, in collaboration with the Southern Football League (SFL), the Southern Collegiate Athletic Association (SCAA), the University of Chattahoochee Tigers football team and Tourism Rockingham have organised a huge christmas party for the home game against Santaclausisgodistan in Tiger Stadium, Rockingham, which will be held on sunday may 13 2018 in North Eurasian calendar. The party will feature a barbecue with cooks dressed as Santa Clice (but they won't be the real Santas from Santaclausisgodistan), christmas presents and candy canes will be given to the crowd (and if Santaclausisgodistan brings presents and candy canes too, it will make more), christmas songs all over the stadium and on the university campus and the halftime show will feature a light show and the following artists will perform live: Miley Cyrus, Mariah Carey and a Bing Crosby tribute artist.

by **Ethane** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 3:37 pm

Day 2

I was allowed to sleep in today. Being tired from travelling, I had to sleep in. I never knew flying could get you so tired, but something I discovered is that I do not sleep well on flights. I was in and out of sleep throughout, and sleeping on the flight gave me a massive headache, so sleeping on a flight is something I want to avoid... but is something I'm going to have to do when I have that very long flight in a years time to where I am doing that conservation project (as long as I raise the money).

I got up, and went downstairs to have breakfast, not realising the time. When I got downstairs I noticed the time on the clock - 1pm. I had not realised I slept that late. But by the time I was downstairs, they were almost ready to sit down for lunch, so I joined them at the table. It was the first time I really really got to interact with my host family. I was staying with a family of 5 - there was the mother who was about 36, the father who was about 42, the sister, who was just turning 18, the older brother, called Gabriel, who was the same age as me (16) and the younger brother, who was 14. This is where I wish I were a less shy person, because I struggled to talk to them. I wish I were better at talking to people, because they seemed so nice, and he seemed cute and friendly, but I couldn't. Because I am terrible with people. I wish I weren't.

We later went to the swimming pool again. That was fun, because we played football again. It turns out I'm actually alright at football, which I never actually knew before. Maybe I'll start playing it with my friends again. Although I don't want to do it doing the exam period again, based on that experience I had.

It was rather an uneventful day, but then I was tired. I do hope that we can go see some of the views of the local town before I go off to the camp. I really hope I enjoy this host family stay.

I have to go, they're calling for dinner.... I'll write again tomorrow.

by **Free Republics** » Wed Dec 21, 2016 8:59 pm

This is your Matchday 14 Cutoff brought to you by FreedomCola! FreedomCola: The Official Cola of World Bowl XXXI!

MD14 Results

All-Mart Conference

RT&T Division
Abaja 44–3 Main Nation Ministry
Banija 47–10 Christian Isles

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Banija                       14   12   2   539  241 +298
2 Abaja                        14    8   6   399  264 +135
3 Main Nation Ministry         14    7   7   267  306  −39
4 Christian Isles              14    3  11   132  457 −325

R&K Bank Division
Cosumar 47–19 Royal Kingdom of Quebec
The Redvale 55–10 Somersville

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Cosumar                      14   12   2   471  190 +281
2 Royal Kingdom of Quebec      14   10   4   396  266 +130
3 The Redvale                  14    6   8   346  373  −27
4 Somersville                  14    1  13   158  482 −324

FreedomCola Division
Southern Democratic States 20–6 Santaclausisgodistan
Vettrera 6–19 Schottia

                              Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Schottia                     14   14   0   538  129 +409
2 Southern Democratic States   14    7   7   202  229  −27
3 Santaclausisgodistan         14    4  10   210  341 −131
4 Vettrera                     14    0  14   104  484 −380

All-Mart Conference

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Schottia                     14   14   0   538  129 +409
 2 Banija                       14   12   2   539  241 +298
 3 Cosumar                      14   12   2   471  190 +281
 4 Royal Kingdom of Quebec      14   10   4   396  266 +130
 5 Abaja                        14    8   6   399  264 +135
 6 Main Nation Ministry         14    7   7   267  306  −39
 7 Southern Democratic States   14    7   7   202  229  −27
 8 The Redvale                  14    6   8   346  373  −27
 9 Santaclausisgodistan         14    4  10   210  341 −131
10 Christian Isles              14    3  11   132  457 −325
11 Somersville                  14    1  13   158  482 −324
12 Vettrera                     14    0  14   104  484 −380

Sporting World Conference

RepublicSoft Division
Allamunnic States 48–0 Qasden
West Saintland 24–0 De Dreamland

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Allamunnic States             14   12   2   542  158 +384
2 West Saintland                14    9   5   302  171 +131*
3 Qasden                        14    5   9   250  357 −107
4 De Dreamland                  14    2  12   188  419 −231

O'Reilly Organization Division
Cumhact 3–34 The United States of Saints
Kebec 7–22 Gregoryisgodistan

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Gregoryisgodistan             14   11   3   368  129 +239
2 The United States of Saints   14    8   6   261  273  −12
3 Kebec                         14    4  10   268  400 −132
4 Cumhact                       14    1  13    82  519 −437

Olden Division
Newmanistan 30–33 Kaboomlandia
The Fair Republic 23–7 Jeckland

                               Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Kaboomlandia                  14   14   0   516  168 +348
2 Newmanistan                   14    9   5   490  312 +178*
3 The Fair Republic             14    9   5   350  260  +90*
4 Jeckland                      14    0  14    82  533 −451

Sporting World Conference

                                Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Kaboomlandia                  14   14   0   516  168 +348
 2 Allamunnic States             14   12   2   542  158 +384
 3 Gregoryisgodistan             14   11   3   368  129 +239
 4 West Saintland                14    9   5   302  171 +131*
 5 Newmanistan                   14    9   5   490  312 +178*
 6 The Fair Republic             14    9   5   350  260  +90*
 7 The United States of Saints   14    8   6   261  273  −12
 8 Qasden                        14    5   9   250  357 −107
 9 Kebec                         14    4  10   268  400 −132
10 De Dreamland                  14    2  12   188  419 −231
11 Cumhact                       14    1  13    82  519 −437
12 Jeckland                      14    0  14    82  533 −451

Nicholls Enterprises Conference

Bank of Acedonia Division
Drawkland 42–27 Fujisawan Territories
Oisinistan 17–33 Fleuronordicia

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Drawkland                        14   14   0   558  191 +367
2 Fujisawan Territories            14    9   5   346  292  +54
3 Fleuronordicia                   14    5   9   291  303  −12
4 Oisinistan                       14    3  11   217  364 −147

Bank of Republica Division
Korizland 10–32 Allamunnic Sporting Commission
Frenline Delpha 27–0 Thereisnogodistan

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Frenline Delpha                  14   13   1   493  195 +298
2 Thereisnogodistan                14    8   6   463  304 +159
3 Allamunnic Sporting Commission   14    7   7   366  382  −16
4 Korizland                        14    0  14   132  601 −469

Baseton Mutual Division
Selvera 6–36 United States of Devonta
Republic of Rawn 0–21 Ethane

                                  Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Ethane                           14   10   4   397  121 +276**
2 United States of Devonta         14   10   4   371  232 +139**
3 Republic of Rawn                 14    3  11   173  468 −295
4 Selvera                          14    2  12   145  499 −354

Nicholls Enterprises Conference

                                   Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Drawkland                        14   14   0   558  191 +367
 2 Frenline Delpha                  14   13   1   493  195 +298
 3 Ethane                           14   10   4   397  121 +276**
 4 United States of Devonta         14   10   4   371  232 +139**
 5 Fujisawan Territories            14    9   5   346  292  +54
 6 Thereisnogodistan                14    8   6   463  304 +159
 7 Allamunnic Sporting Commission   14    7   7   366  382  −16
 8 Fleuronordicia                   14    5   9   291  303  −12
 9 Oisinistan                       14    3  11   217  364 −147
10 Republic of Rawn                 14    3  11   173  468 −295
11 Selvera                          14    2  12   145  499 −354
12 Korizland                        14    0  14   132  601 −469

Dixon Light Conference

New Republican Wrestling Conglomerate Division
Free Republics 13–42 Nassau-Hessen
Smertonosnyy 14–10 Equatorial Zeldaen

  New Republican Wrestling Conglomerate Division Pld   W  L   PF  PA  PD 
1 Nassau-Hessen             14   12   2   537  197 +340
2 Free Republics            14   10   4   351  186 +165***
3 Equatorial Zeldaen        14    4  10   235  457 −222
4 Smertonosnyy              14    2  12   212  409 −197

National Organization for Men Division
West Angola 20–25 Northern Shrekistan
Greater Vakolicci Haven 38–40 Chromatika

  National Organization for Men Division Pld   W  L   PF  PA  PD 
1 Chromatika                14   12   2   466  196 +270
2 Greater Vakolicci Haven   14   10   4   509  268 +241***
3 Northern Shrekistan       14    4  10   257  487 −230
4 West Angola               14    4  10   195  389 −194

BearOil Division
Firebolt 53–0 Cryandolap
Abanhfleft 56–3 Kosovakia

  BearOil Division                  Pld   W  L   PF  PA  PD 
1 Abanhfleft                14   13   1   586  143 +443
2 Firebolt                  14    8   6   388  359  +29
3 Cryandolap                14    3  11   206  475 −269
4 Kosovakia                 14    2  12   208  584 −376

Dixon Light Conference

                            Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Abanhfleft                14   13   1   586  143 +443
 2 Chromatika                14   12   2   466  196 +270
 3 Nassau-Hessen             14   12   2   537  197 +340
 4 Greater Vakolicci Haven   14   10   4   509  268 +241***
 5 Free Republics            14   10   4   351  186 +165***
 6 Firebolt                  14    8   6   388  359  +29
 7 Northern Shrekistan       14    4  10   257  487 −230
 8 West Angola               14    4  10   195  389 −194
 9 Equatorial Zeldaen        14    4  10   235  457 −222
10 Cryandolap                14    3  11   206  475 −269
11 Kosovakia                 14    2  12   208  584 −376
12 Smertonosnyy              14    2  12   212  409 −197

Playoff Seeding Table

Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
 1 Schottia                  14   14   0   538  129 +409
 2 Drawkland                 14   14   0   558  191 +367
 3 Kaboomlandia              14   14   0   516  168 +348
 4 Abanhfleft                14   13   1   586  143 +443
 5 Frenline Delpha           14   13   1   493  195 +298
 6 Allamunnic States         14   12   2   542  158 +384
 7 Banija                    14   12   2   539  241 +298
 8 Chromatika                14   12   2   466  196 +270
 9 Nassau-Hessen             14   12   2   537  197 +340
10 Cosumar                   14   12   2   471  190 +281
11 Gregoryisgodistan         14   11   3   368  129 +239
12 Ethane                    14   10   4   397  121 +276
13 Greater Vakolicci Haven   14   10   4   509  268 +241
14 United States of Devonta  14   10   4   371  232 +139
15 Royal Kingdom of Quebec   14   10   4   396  266 +130
16 West Saintland            14    9   5   302  171 +131

World Bowl XXXI Round of 16

#1 Schottia v. #16 West Saintland @ IslandDome in Toakameau, Falatulu
#2 Drawkland v. #15 Royal Kingdom of Quebec @ National Organization for Men Stadium in Estonopolis, Keronama
#3 Kaboomlandia v. #14 United States of Devonta @ RepublicSoft Stadium in New City, Orlandiana
#4 Abanhfleft v. #13 Greater Vakolicci Haven @ Alex Tomlinson Memorial Stadium in Barkersville, Amolotopia
#5 Frenline Delpha v. #12 Ethane @ PetroDome in Petrograd, Plymouth
#6 Allamunnic States v. #11 Gregoryisgodistan @ Kountry Bank Stadium in Albertope, Roxawa
#7 Banija v. #10 Cosumar @ AllMartDome in Reco, Jolarus
#8 Chromatika v. #9 Nassau-Hessen @ Church of Technicology Stadium in Tarita, Quartona

Those looking for RP ideas for the Round of 16 are welcome to RP about the Dixon Light Players-Only Party Sponsored By Sporting World which will be held at the IslandDome in Falatulu several days prior to the Round of 16.

In addition, though it breaks with tradition, I want to extend my condolences to the 32 nations that were left out of the playoffs and thank them for participating in the regular season of World Bowl XXXI. The Round of 16 is currently scheduled for the 29th, which is a week from tomorrow.

by **Free Republics** » Thu Dec 29, 2016 3:38 pm

As we have yet to see any RPs for the Round of 16 and its around 2 and a half hours before the start of the cutoff window, I'm delaying the Round of 16 until tomorrow and pushing back the rest of the World Bowl accordingly.

by **Kaboomlandia** » Fri Dec 30, 2016 11:59 am

Phoenix squeak past Newmanistan with dramatic gaffe to close out undefeated group stage

It wasn't pretty, but considering the Kaboomlandia Phoenix were playing their backup squad, they'll certainly take this win. A 33-30 win over Newmanistan finished off the group stage for the Phoenix with a flawless 14-0 record, top spot in the Sporting World conference and third overall in the World Bowl, behind only Schottia and Drawkland. Russell Jones had the start for the Phoenix and performed well, throwing for 251 yards and two touchdowns. "The game was definitely closer than we would have liked, but I was still really impressed with Russell's work under centre, as well as with Pauly Anderson in the running game." The rookie running back looked impressive as well, rushing 20 times for 112 yards, though he didn't score. However, the game was eventually won on a brutal gaffe by Newmanistan when their returner dropped the kickoff and forced the Rockets to start from their own three-yard line, eventually giving up a safety to the Phoenix. In addition, a crucial blocked field goal on the final play sealed the deal for the Kaboomlandian team that has been a juggernaut all tournament. With the win, the Phoenix finish third overall in the standings and will play the United States of Devonta in the Round of 16. The Devontans barely got in after a tiebreaker left them in the wild-card spot, so they will undoubtedly be looking for a bounce-back game against the Phoenix. The first quarter of the game started with a bang right off the kickoff return:

"The opening kickoff is up here at Keisler Stadium. Ball is down inside the Phoenix 5-yard line, Hayes going to try and return this. Manny Hayes makes it to the 15-yard line untouched, making some moves now and here he goes down the left side. Hayes still with it, breaking tackles and still going! The rest of the team blocking for Hayes and he's to the 50! Manny Hayes is untouched and he's going to score off of the kickoff return! What a run!"

The 98-yard kick return for a touchdown is the longest of Hayes' career, and immediately put the Phoenix up 7-0 after the extra point was converted. The Rockets would bounce back though, launching a four-minute drive that eventually ended in a 16-yard run for a touchdown to tie the game. After this touchdown tied the score, Russell Jones went to work and looked impressive, only needing to convert one third down along the way to his first touchdown of the game with a 12-yard touchdown pass to Brett Schremp on a well-executed play. After the first quarter, Kaboomlandia led the Rockets 14-7. The game began to heat up in the second quarter, as the Phoenix appeared to force a fumble inside their own 20-yard line, but then had the play called back on review. After the fumble was reversed, the Rockets quickly advanced and eventually scored a passing touchdown from the 6-yard line. Late in the second quarter, the Phoenix went back to work:

"Third down and three with the Phoenix at the Rockets 36-yard line. Ball is snapped back to Russell Jones, score tied at 14-all. Now Jones will toss the ball back to Anderson, Pauly Anderson running to the far side of the field. Anderson reaches the line of scrimmage, now cuts upfield. Anderson still going, breaks a tackle there! Anderson is going down the left side, dodges the secondary and he is going to score! What a run from Pauly Anderson!"

The second quarter ended 21-17 for the Phoenix after a last-second field goal from the Rockets put them closer. The third quarter was somewhat uneventful, with both teams trading a touchdown and the Rockets adding a field goal to put the game at 28-27 Kaboomlandia. However, after a field goal for both sides put the game at 31-30, Newmanistan returner Eddie White made one of the worst errors of the tournament with just two minutes left:

"Kaboomlandian kicker Caleb McCallum has just made it 31-30, kickoff is coming up. The ball is up in the air, right to the Newmanistan goal line, return coming from Eddie White...no, he dropped it! Eddie White fumbled the ball, and now he's going to fall on it, but a horribly misplayed kickoff return puts the Rockets right at their own goal line!"

The Rockets intentionally took a safety to get off their own goal line, since any turnover in the redzone would be disastrous. They quickly got down the field, and with four seconds to go and time for just one play, kicker Steve Hutchinson stepped up to the line:

"Rockets attempting a 47-yard field goal here to tie the game. Steve Hutchinson sizing up the distance, and now he's stepping up. One chance left. The ball is snapped, holder has it clean...IT IS BLOCKED! THE GAME IS OVER! PHOENIX ARE UNDEFEATED IN THE GROUP STAGE!"

The last-second field goal block helped the Phoenix to solidify their top-three seed. Next up is the United States of Devonta. While Kaboomlandia has historically beaten down this nation over several tournaments in several sports, Nivek isn't resting on his laurels. "The Devontans got their foot in the door and they'll be looking to prove something here, so we can't rest." Obviously, Travis Reuben will start tonight's game.

by **Banija** » Fri Dec 30, 2016 1:19 pm

The All-Banija Sports Magazine
The only nationwide publication that is all sports, all the time!

Banija finished 2nd in All-Mart Conference; draw conference foe and tournament blue bloods Cosumar in the Round of 16

Banijans at practice before their Round of 16 matchup with Cosumar

RECO- The Kingdom of Banija was able to finish the group stage 12-2, and come out with the #7 overall seed for the knockout stages. Their 2 losses, of course, were to regional rival Abaja away from home, followed by a close, 33-26 classic battle against #1 overall seed Schottia, who blasted through the All-Mart Conference with a perfect 14-0 record, one of three teams to finish the group stages undefeated. Ultimately, they had two very tough road losses, and Ezekiel Daniachew continued his record of group stage home dominance here in his 3rd World Bowl, compiling a stunning 15-1 record at the Stadium of the Restoration during World Bowl play. Their stadium, thanks to the skill of the team and the passion of their fans, is officially a fortress, and very few teams can go and win in Banija.

Unfortunately for Banija, the knockout stages are always at a neutral site location. And while Ezekiel Daniachew has two tournaments with two straight 4th place finishes, the trip to the semifinals for a 3rd tournament in a row, an accomplishment in its own right, is going to be much, much tougher. First, of course, they have to go up against sporting powerhouse Cosumar. A power in the NSCF, a power in the World Bowl, they were one of the three other blue bloods in Banija's division. While all 4 blue bloods finished in the top 4 in the All-Mart Conference, Banija defeated two of them, Quebec at home and Cosumar away from home. Banija defeated Cosumar 26-10 away from home already in this World Bowl, which makes Banija the early favorites to pull the double.

The group stage matchup doesn't matter at all now, as Cosumar will have the last laugh if they win in this one. There is still a lot of football to be played, however, and quite the tough path for the Kingdom of Banija. After Cosumar, their next likely opponent will be Drawkland, the defending champs who knocked Banija out of World Bowl XXX. And, of course, with undefeated giants like Kaboomlandia and Schottia looming after them, it will be the toughest ride Banija has probably ever had to the semifinals.

Of course, Banija has never lost at this stage before, but they've never played an opponent of this quality at this stage before either. The key on offense for this team, of course, will be the return of Dennis Zervos. After his kidnapping, and a whole host of other events, he is back on the team, and he will play for the first time since that ill-fated trip to the Main Nation Ministry against Cosumar. He will be rusty, of course, as he hasn't practiced much either, but he will be fresh. It will be interesting to see how he handles the small things, like picking up blitzes, against this historic powerhouse.

Another key, of course, will be how does the defense hold up. They held up extremely well in this matchup in the group stages. Cosumar, however, is bound to make adjustments. How will this defense respond? Will they throw wrinkles into the playbook to disguise coverages, to show something new? This team has been in the knockout stages enough times so far to know not to show everything they've got during the group stages, as it is the knockouts that truly matter. They are talented enough to get out of the group on a handicapped playbook, so look for new looks and new plays to help keep the Cosumar offense guessing.

Dragutin Tomikj had a pick six in the last matchup, and Cosumar had only two scoring drives throughout the entire game, one field goal and one touchdown. The only problem for Banija is if they continue to not finish drives. In their last matchup with Cosumar, the only struggle was the fact that they scored only one offensive touchdown. If they keep kicking field goals this time around, and let Cosumar hang around for longer than they should, they could pay for it in the end. Ultimately, the AllMartDome will play host to a great matchup with two teams from the conference that bears the same sponsor, but ultimately, we believe that the hunger and talent of this Banijan team will allow them to win this matchup, in the only knockout stage matchup that Banija could reasonably be considered the favorite in.

Our Final Score Prediction: Banija 24, Cosumar 21.

by **Allamunnic States** » Fri Dec 30, 2016 7:05 pm

The Locker Room, Kountry Bank Stadium
Albertope, Roxawa, Free Republics

By any reasonable prediction, the Regulars should not have made it as far as they had, Torren thought. Not, at least, after being forced to weather almost an entire AGL season's worth of games against tough international competition, playing hard enough to reach a 12-2 record, playing with a roster about half the size of a proper AGL team. Somehow, they had even managed to make it to the playoffs without any major injuries, which was something of a miracle. Although here and there, players had missed some time with injuries, and everyone was beaten, bruised, cut, and scraped, somehow, they were all healthy enough to play in their Round of Sixteen match up against Gregoryisgodistan.

He had no doubt that their rematch against the Grid Slaves would leave the Regulars once again battered and bruised. They had come out clicking on all cylinders in their first match up against a team that was often literally playing for their lives, hanging a 53-13 loss on the Grid Slaves. Thinking back on it, Torren still was not sure how they had managed to so thoroughly dominate what was still one of the premier teams in the World Bowl, one that had often enough given Allamunnic offenses fits, forcing them to turn to their defense to scrape out close wins.

Perhaps it had been a matter of Bryndyn Traewyk seemingly being able to do no wrong, clearly a threat to score every time he touched the ball. A 26-rush, 302-yard, four touchdown day for the running back had done much to tarnish an otherwise strong campaign by the Greggy defense, while highlighting what had, frankly, been an almost unreal run by Traewyk, who had had perhaps the most statistically-wonderful season by an Allamunnic running back in international play ever. Even if the blocking was top notch, the simple fact of the matter was that Traewyk had rushed for over 2300 yards over fourteen games, which was rather absurd, especially with the load he had carried over that span.

So maybe they had a chance to go far. Torren sighed, trying to center himself before the game. He was weirdly relaxed, considering he tended to get rather lively over the course of the buildup prior to a game. Perhaps it had helped getting to spend a little more time with Shae prior to the game. Or, perhaps it had been the call he had received only moments before, shared with Rik.

The phone had rang, and Olafsunn had brought it to Torren, looking worried. Fearing the worst, Torren took the phone from his head coach's hands, and had held it up to his ear.

"Torren Tormundsunn. May I ask who's speaking? What can I do for you?" he asked.

A gruff voice answered him. "Hello, Mr. Tormundsunn. I'm just calling to wish you luck on your team's game today. There are a lot of people watching with great interest."

Perplexed, Torren narrowed his eyes. After a moment, he repeated himself. "Thank you, I appreciate the sentiment. But can I ask who I'm speaking to?"

There was a laugh on the other end of the line, sounding for all the world an awful lot like an old dog barking. "Well, I can tell you who else is on the line. Let me tell you, after reviewing the footage, Mr. Kolvyn is going to be watching this game with great interest. My name is Stevan, and I'm sitting here with the Commissioner reviewing whether or not he will be, in fact, keeping his job after he fucked up so badly that he chased away some of Allamunnika's best and favorite athletes, replaced them with a coach not up to the job of rebuilding a celebrated program overnight, and then managed to alienate the new coach and team while he was at it," he explained with an unusual amount of cheer in his voice. "So, again, we will be watching with great interest. Best of luck to you all. I've always been a fan, Mr. Tormundsunn."

When the line went dead, Torren looked at Rik. "Is that who I think it was?" Olafsunn, straight faced, nodded.

"If you think it was General Grimmeburger, yes." The satisfaction in his voice was clear. "He told me he'd be willing to welcome us back, under a new commissioner, next year, if we're willing to come back. And to wish us good luck in the game, since we're the only Allamunnic team still standing."

Suddenly feeling a new surge of energy, Torren grabbed his helmet. "Well, no reason the others shouldn't know. Hopefully this will put them in the right mood before we take on the Greggy's." And with that, he was gone, ready for the biggest game of the team's career to that point.

by **Drawkland** » Fri Dec 30, 2016 7:43 pm

WORLD BOWL XXXI PLAYOFFS TO BEGIN
Written By: Phillip Ward and Ben Lincoln

RECENT RESULTS
FROM BANK of ACEDONIA DIVISION:
Oisinistan 10–15 Drawkland
Fujisawan Territories 17–7 Fleuronordicia
Oisinistan 33–3 Republic of Rawn
Fujisawan Territories 20–19 United States of Devonta
Frenline Delpha 38–0 Fleuronordicia
Allamunnic Sporting Commission 17–37 Drawkland
Drawkland 42–27 Fleuronordicia
Oisinistan 24–29 Fujisawan Territories
Fleuronordicia 0–24 Ethane
Drawkland 63–9 Selvera
Thereisnogodistan 47–17 Oisinistan
Korizland 17–50 Fujisawan Territories
Republic of Rawn 0–23 Fleuronordicia
United States of Devonta 13–40 Drawkland
Oisinistan 20–43 Frenline Delpha
Fujisawan Territories 6–17 Allamunnic Sporting Commission
Fujisawan Territories 17–54 Drawkland
Fleuronordicia 34–3 Oisinistan
Ethane 45–0 Oisinistan
Selvera 16–13 Fujisawan Territories
Fleuronordicia 10–29 Thereisnogodistan
Drawkland 56–13 Korizland
Drawkland 27–6 Oisinistan
Fleuronordicia 13–23 Fujisawan Territories
Oisinistan 40–0 Selvera
Fujisawan Territories 13–13 Ethane (19–16 OT)
Allamunnic Sporting Commission 44–20 Fleuronordicia
Frenline Delpha 22–26 Drawkland
Fleuronordicia 7–18 United States of Devonta
Drawkland 60–9 Republic of Rawn
Thereisnogodistan 23–36 Fujisawan Territories
Korizland 14–20 Oisinistan
Fleuronordicia 0–32 Drawkland
Fujisawan Territories 33–13 Oisinistan
Republic of Rawn 9–40 Fujisawan Territories
United States of Devonta 17–0 Oisinistan
Fleuronordicia 64–3 Korizland
Drawkland 41–0 Thereisnogodistan
Ethane 21–23 Drawkland
Selvera 13–53 Fleuronordicia
Oisinistan 14–24 Allamunnic Sporting Commission
Fujisawan Territories 16–22 Frenline Delpha
Drawkland 42–27 Fujisawan Territories
Oisinistan 17–33 Fleuronordicia
Bank of Acedonia Division         Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD 
1 Drawkland                        14   14   0   558  191 +367
2 Fujisawan Territories            14    9   5   346  292  +54
3 Fleuronordicia                   14    5   9   291  303  −12
4 Oisinistan                       14    3  11   217  364 −147
Nicholls Enterprises Conference    Pld    W   L    PF   PA   PD
 1 Drawkland                        14   14   0   558  191 +367
 2 Frenline Delpha                  14   13   1   493  195 +298
 3 Ethane                           14   10   4   397  121 +276**
 4 United States of Devonta         14   10   4   371  232 +139**
 5 Fujisawan Territories            14    9   5   346  292  +54
 6 Thereisnogodistan                14    8   6   463  304 +159
 7 Allamunnic Sporting Commission   14    7   7   366  382  −16
 8 Fleuronordicia                   14    5   9   291  303  −12
 9 Oisinistan                       14    3  11   217  364 −147
10 Republic of Rawn                 14    3  11   173  468 −295
11 Selvera                          14    2  12   145  499 −354
12 Korizland                        14    0  14   132  601 −469

Well, Drawkland had already qualified for the World Bowl XXXI playoffs awhile ago, but that doesn't stop us from making things seem mysterious and intense in our article titles. Who doesn't love a little suspense? The Grid Corps did have something at stake for the last 3 matches of the Divisional/Conference stage: an undefeated record, which, before these last 3 matches started, only 4 teams, 1 in each division, had obtained. Schottia, Kaboomlandia, Drawkland, and Chromatika were the only teams which did not have a loss going into this final stretch. The race for good seeds and good reputation for the playoffs was certainly at stake going into these last games. With a lineup of Thereisnogodistan, Ethane, and Fujisawan Territories, it's clear that the difficulty would progress as it went to the playoffs, and it likely will keep progressing into the playoffs, and (hopefully) into the final game of World Bowl XXXI.

vs THEREISNOGODISTAN
We sorta made a big deal about how the Grid Corps skunked Fleuronordicia in the last game, but then here comes the Grid Corps with another several-dozen-to-nothing licking of the Atheists, who live somewhere near Abanhfleft. So, considering how we didn't get to destroy Abanhfleft again in the group stage like we did in the Final of last Bowl, this is being viewed as a sort of consolation prize, a spiritual defeat of the Fleftics, considering these people are basically rebellious godless Fleftics. Anyway, on to the actual action, shall we?

Drawkland won the toss and elected to receive for once, just to shake things up apparently. The tight Atheist defense started off very well, holding the Grid Corps offense to only a field goal to start off. However, after the kickoff, the Atheists were troubled by the heavy Corps defense but still fought on. They eventually were stopped around the 50 yard line and were forced to punt, which was booted past the end zone for a touchback. The offense really sucked away most of the clock left in the quarter then, eventually being forced to kick another field goal at around the 12 yard line. With the Corps leading 6-0 going into the second, it was expected to be a close game throughout. This was far from the truth, however, as the Drawkian lines seemed to grow into themselves, surrounded by the home crowd and all, and managed to score two touchdowns before the half closed, thanks to a heavy goal line rush by Bennett Morgan and a bomb pass to Michael Hughes, who shed a tackle and ran 15 yards for the touchdown. Leading 20-0 at the half, it was clear that the game was going to stay in Drawkian hands.

The 3rd quarter was marked by the apparent stout and stubborness of the Atheist O-line, who after receiving the kickoff, seemed utterly determined to score no matter the cost. They went on 4th down 3 times, which was absolutely remarkable that they made it each time, but unfortunately for them, after wasting half of the quarter, the ball found itself in the hands of Osman Oswald in the end zone, who took the interception out for about 3 yards. The Drawkian offense was stuck backed up against their own line with the looming threat of a safety, but thanks to a beautiful execution of a wildcat offense play, which Antonio Anders took out for not only the first down but a full 17-yard run which brought the Corps safely to their 20 yard line. With limited time left in the quarter, the Corps sped down the field with a series of hard-hitting long pass plays, which eventually gained them a 1st-and-Goal on the 8 yard line. A halfback screen play to Morgan brought the Corps another touchdown and the score to 27-0.

With only about a minute left in the 3rd, Thereisnogodistan obviously wasn't able to put much together before the 4th quarter started. Despite their best interests, Johnny Varn dropped the ball during a carry as he was tackled by Safety William Peers. Chris Frasier was near and so he scooped the loose ball right up and returned it for a Pick 6, after a near-70-yard run. The crowd was extremely excited after this, as Matthew Watts took the score up to 34-0. Thereisnogodistan's second possession of the quarter ended badly too, with their vain attempt to push past 4th down failing at the Drawkian 42. With minutes remaining that one could count on one hand, the Drawkian offense drained the clock of all the time it had left, calling timeout with two seconds left, as they were 2nd and Goal on the 1 yard line. Morgan hurdled the offensive line and brought the score to 41-0 after Watts' successful kick. The home crowd went crazy after the fact, which is great for morale. With 2 tough games ahead, it made everyone feel like the Corps would definitely be alright.

DRAWKLAND	6	14	7	14	41
THEREISNOGODISTAN	0	0	0	0	0

World Bowl XXXI Schedule - Grid Corps
Home Team Listed First
1. Oisinistan 10–15 Drawkland
2. Allamunnic Sporting Commission 17–37 Drawkland
3. Drawkland 42–27 Fleuronordicia
4. Drawkland 63–9 Selvera
5. United States of Devonta 13–40 Drawkland
6. Fujisawan Territories 17–54 Drawkland
7. Drawkland 56–13 Korizland
8. Drawkland 27–6 Oisinistan
9. Frenline Delpha 22–26 Drawkland
10. Drawkland 60–9 Republic of Rawn
11. Fleuronordicia 0–32 Drawkland
12. Drawkland 41–0 Thereisnogodistan
13. Ethane 21–23 Drawkland
14. Drawkland 42–27 Fujisawan Territories

vs ETHANE
The Red Kites of Ethane, the team from the hosts of last World Bowl, maybe not be what many call a powerhouse in the halls of international gridiron, but they're still a respectable team, and hell, they're deftly in charge of the Baseton Mutual Division. Ignoring the fact that United States of Devonta seems to be gaining ground, Ethane looks to be in good prospects to qualify for the playoffs this Bowl. The game was sure to be an exciting one, even playing in the very stadium that the last World Bowl final was held in, meaning the Drawkian team and crowd would be semi-used to the surroundings and ready to take on the game at full force.

After losing the toss, Drawkland had to kick to Ethane to start the match. The Ethanese obviously put up a much harder fight than the previous two teams had, and they scored a touchdown from the hands of Christopher Stewart to Jack Mason, after spending most of the quarter on the field. The defensive line was simply phenomenal to start off, holding the Grid Corps to no points and forcing them to kick a 53-yard field goal, which was missed. The red kits of the Red Kites picked the ball up there, and drove it to the Drawkian 15 before the quarter ended. Soon after the quarter ended though, the halfback Jerry Lawrence took the ball outside for a run into the end zone for a touchdown. Daniel Madison managed a good return on the kickoff, but not good enough, getting to the 31 yard line before being taken down. The Drawkian offense finally managed to run effectively against the Red Kites defense, and marched their way downfield to score their first points of the game. The Red Kites tried desperately to score before the half was up to stay on top, but the 46-yard field goal was blocked by a diving swat from Bernard Violan. The end of the half came and went, 14-7 Ethane.

Drawkland put up a formidable offensive stand, going up the field in 14 plays. However, 1st and Goal yielded an unfortunate interception from Loren Owen. He didn't get far, however, getting stumped at the 2 yard line. While the Ethane home crowd began cheering and getting excited at stopping points from being put on the board, it was soon reversed. On the first play, Gerald Fairfield snuck through the offensive line and put a huge sack on Stewart before he could pitch away the ball, dropping him in the end zone for a safety. The score was then 14-9, with the Red Kites still in the lead, but the safety punt brought the Grid Corps to the 25 yard line. Fighting up the field once again, Dak Waterman finally passed a good one to Toby Miller, open in the deep, which went in for the touchdown. The home crowd reacted in a chorus of dissent as Matthew Watts' extra point was good and brought the score to a close 14-16, Drawkland finally in the lead. Ethane got the ball back and scored, but not until the 4th quarter had already went underway. The 3rd-and-Goal bullet to Bradley Wood in the end zone took the Red Kites to the lead again, 21-16.

The last drive of the game came down to the final seconds. It looked like Drawkland was finally going to be defeated after a 21-game winning streak, but that simply was not to be. It was 4th and Goal, the 6 yard line, the last play of the game (as it was 0:10 and the Corps had no timeouts left). Waterman was close in the pocket, but lo and behold, all his receivers were covered. The seconds ticked by and he realized there was no way he'd get a pass in on the end zone. Suddenly, Jonathan Tyler of the Red Kites came barreling through the line straight towards the Drawkian quarterback. Then, unexpected by everyone, Waterman squared his shoulders and shot forward, ramming Tyler to the ground in an unexpected show of force, then continued to rush into the end zone for the touchdown. Matthew Watts' final kick of the game sealed the deal. 21-23 Drawkland, and the home crowd was livid. It was an amazing play to end the game, and to continue the win streak.

ETHANE	7	7	0	7	21
DRAWKLAND	0	7	9	7	23

vs FUJISAWAN TERRITORIES
In the highly anticipated match to end the group stage of this Bowl, and one that would decide whether or not the Fujisawans would be able to qualify for their first Bowl back in a long while, the stadium in Metropolon was packed. Every seat filled, every fan just waiting to see with bated breath how the Hurricanes and the Corps would do in their rematch against each other.

You can probably guess the result. After a lot of fuss, the Corps came out on top. This is exactly how it happened.

Fujisawan Territories won the toss and elected to receive. The opening drive was long and hard, and it was clear that the Fujisawan O-line had practiced long and hard on what challenges they knew the Drawkian defense would provide them. However, after being thwarted on their own 15 yard line and stuck at 4th and 10, the Hurricane kicker Torazo Yogi booted it between the uprights for the team to take an early lead away from home, 0-3. The Fujisawan defense had also prepared for the hard-hitting run game and the zooming pass game, and stopped the Corps in its tracks for 4 straight drives, forcing a 3-and-Out on one of the them. Drawkland didn't get a taste of points until very late in the second quarter, thanks to a longer pass to Riley Hoyt. The pass from Waterman went about 20 yards into the hands of Hoyt, who muffed the catch a little bit. Still, despite Yoichibei Watari's excellent pressure, Hoyt managed to grab the ball back out of the air after tipping it, and then came down right on the goal for a touchdown. This, of course, was after the Hurricanes had already scored a field goal. The Hurricane offense hadn't been going totally smoothly to start off, indicated by the few interceptions thrown and not the smoothest clicking scoring drives seen, but thanks to the power of the defense, it didn't seem to matter very much. After the Drawkland touchdown, which put the Grid Corps in the lead 7-6, the Hurricanes took the ball to the 30 at the kickoff, then drove up the field which such power that the Corps defense was visibly shocked in the huddle, according to player accounts afterward. The holes in the defense were starting to become wider and wider, and the passes ran wild down the field. 3 first downs in a row, and after a facemask penalty from Brice Morton on a run attempt, the Hurricanes were 1st-and-Goal with a minute left in the half. 2 epic runs by running back Shoyo Oka (7 yard and 2 yard), the Hurricanes took the touchdown with only seconds to spare. The extra point made the score 7-13, and despite Madison's best efforts, he couldn't get the ball past the kickoff team, and the half ended with a Fujisawan lead.

Halftime seemed to stretch on forever. The National Marching Band put on a great show, but meanwhile, the locker rooms seemed to have intense changes in attitude from both teams. It really seemed like the first half and second half were two totally different games. Despite the lowkey hopes from many Drawkian fans that the Corps would lose to allow Fujisawan Territories to qualify for the playoffs, these and the intense hopes from the Fujisawan Territories homeland were hugely dashed in the second half. The kickoff to begin the quarter was fielded by Madison, where he took it in for his trademark touchdown return like he does in most games. Just in the blink of an eye and clock, the game was 14-13 with a Drawkian lead. The Hurricanes clearly began to feel pressure, and despite that, their offense still managed to power down the grid, ending with a 30-yard pass to Doppo Nitta who snagged the pass and pushed the extra 6 yards to pick up another touchdown, pulling it to 14-20 Hurricanes. The quarter began to wane away, but Bennett Morgan fielded a pass after a play action fake and ran up the middle of the field on an inside run, unopposed, and sprinted between the hashes before the secondary defenders had a chance to realize he was open. The resulting touchdown brought it to 21-20, winning by only a hair it seemed. The crowd was so intense as the game wound up for the 4th quarter.

To start the final quarter of play, the Hurricanes speedily went up the field. They wanted to get as many points as possible as fast as possible, and the opening drive worked like a charm against the tiring Drawkian defense, getting them yet another touchdown thanks to a flat pass to Katzumi Kon which was run in to score. 21-27 Hurricanes. But then the Grid Corps offense finally figured out how to thwart the Fujisawan defense. On their own 45, Waterman called an audible and then the offense ran out into a 5-vertical pass scheme, busting through the Hurricane secondary into the open, with the longer strides and taller frames keeping them up and in the open for a pass to connect, which it did. Richard Anderson, who hadn't gotten much action on the Corps starting line, caught a pass which undershot Daniel Madison, and then took it in for the touchdown. 28-27 Grid Corps. And after the touchback on the kickoff from the Hurricanes, a pass meant for Kon went instead into the hands of Fairfield who brought the interception and turned it into a Pick 6. Plus Watts' faithful foot, and suddenly the Hurricanes were seriously trailing, 35-27. The final straw for the game was the ending, where the Hurricanes desperately went to kick a field goal for any points at all, as they were 4th and 22 after a series of sacks and a painful penalty. The kick was looking to be good, had Jordan Tomek not hurdled the offensive line at just the right moment to jump out in front of the kick to block it effectively with his helmet. The ball was indeed loose, bouncing off of the chest of the stunned Yogi and twiddling across the middle hashes, where Tomek scooped it up himself and sprinted down the field, 60 yards for a touchdown with only a minute left in the game. Insult to injury it seemed, the scoreline of 42-27 crushing the dreams of the Fujisawan Territories' return to international gridiron.

DRAWKLAND	0	7	14	21	42
FUJISAWAN TERRITORIES	3	10	7	7	27

PLAYOFF MATCHUPS
Unfortunately, the loss to Drawkland kept Fujisawan Territories out of the playoffs and allowed United States of Devonta in, which really seemed to disappoint many from both Drawkland and the Territories. Many believe the Hurricanes and their better playing deserved a spot in the playoffs over the less notable Devonta. However, the rules are the rules, and the Nicholls Enterprises Conference wasn't the only one to have rather upsetting upsets in qualifications. This isn't supposed to be an editorial though, so we'll let this slide. We should talk about who actually qualified.

Schottia, Drawkland, Kaboomlandia, Abanhfleft, Frenline Delpha, Allamunnic States, Banija, Chromatika, Nassau-Hessen, Cosumar, Gregoryisgodistan, Ethane, Greater Vakolicci Haven, United States of Devonta, Royal Kingdom of Quebec, and West Saintland. You're looking at the qualifiers for the World Bowl XXXI playoffs, in seed order. Only the first 3, Schottia, Drawkland, and Kaboomlandia, are the only ones to scrape through undefeated throughout the Divisional stage. The playoffs will be reseeded after every round, so that adds another element of uncertainty to this entire tirade. So, on to predictions!

Schottia vs West Saintland is pretty clearly going to be a blowout in Schottia's favor. The Leviathans have been dominant ever since they won World Bowl XXVIII and this was confirmed when they took home 3rd place in WB XXX. We'd say they're one of the contenders for the championship this Bowl, and it starts by dominating this match against West Saintland.
Drawkland vs Royal Kingdom of Quebec will definitely be close. The two nations have close sporting relations (think IBC 21), so the stadium will be packed, besides the fact it's in Keronama of the Free Republics. Of course though, we expect Drawkland to pull this one out with flying colors: it'd be an insane upset if they didn't. The Grim Reapers will have their usual expert gridiron performance end here in the Round of 16.
Kaboomlandia vs United States of Devonta seems like it'll be a win from those of the explosive lands, but knowing the Phoenixes' tendency to choke early in World Bowl playoffs, this one can go up in the air. However, we do hope Kaboomlandia wins so that there'll be justice for the Hurricanes and the Fujisawan Territories missing out of the playoffs at the hand of the Devontans. Go Phoenixes!
Abanhfleft vs Greater Vakolicci Haven is easy to guess. The World #1 vs qualifiers from an easy conference and division, who've never made it to the World Bowl playoffs before? Steamroll expected from the Fleftic Gridiron Machine.
Frenline Delpha vs Ethane is a group stage rematch, which Frenline Delpha unsurprisingly won. The Anacondas will constrict the Red Kites to death in a close but ultimately Frenlinian-led game.
Allamunnic States vs Gregoryisgodistan is another easy one to guess. Despite being disadvantaged, being smaller and less filled with star power, the Regulars now have the full attention of their nation, and will easily take down the Grid Slaves to advance to the Quarterfinals.
Banija vs Cosumar is another hard one to guess, but we think the up-and-coming Banija will beat out the Cosumarites to advance. Maybe this time they'll finally at least get to third place, rather than losing the 3PPO again.
Chromatika and Nassau-Hessen isn't expected to be super close. Another lucky group draw qualifier, Nassau-Hessen isn't expected to put up any thread to the Iron Legion of Chromatika, who were actually undefeated until taking 2 losses from the last 3 games. Maybe they're on a cold streak and will lose, but we doubt that. The match is expected to end in a Chromatik win.

And that's it! Future predictions will come with future rounds. Thanks for going strong now, Grid Corps, so show off in the playoffs and do us good. On Corps!

by **Free Republics** » Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:22 pm

This is your Round of 16 Cutoff brought to you by Olden Automobile Company! Olden: We Were Good Enough for your Grandfather and We Are Good Enough for You!

Round of 16 Results

West Saintland 10–30 Schottia*
Drawkland 20–14 Royal Kingdom of Quebec
Kaboomlandia 56–29 United States of Devonta
Abanhfleft 46–17 Greater Vakolicci Haven
Frenline Delpha 53–13 Ethane
Allamunnic States 33–26 Gregoryisgodistan
Banija 10–7 Cosumar
Chromatika 34–27 Nassau-Hessen

*Scorinated by Frenline Delpha

World Bowl XXXI Quarterfinals

#1 Schottia v. #8 Chromatika @ MilaneseDome in Wortana, Keronama
#2 Drawkland v. #7 Banija @ FreedomCola Stadium in Borotia, Iodara
#3 Kaboomlandia v. #6 Allamunnic States @ Podvez Field in Yellow Bay, Vorita
#4 Abanhfleft v. #5 Frenline Delpha @ Olden Stadium in Falkamore, Nejax

by **Allamunnic States** » Sat Dec 31, 2016 4:01 pm

This was redemption. Last year, the Regulars had crumbled in crunch time. Last year, they had allowed their opponent to play them to a standstill, and then made a crucial mistake that had lost them the game in overtime. This time, they would allow no such thing, as Graagur Wyrth gave Bryndyn Traewyk the hand off at the Regulars' 46. Torren was already in motion by the time Bryndyn took the snap, and was squarely ahead of the running back as they ran between Snaari Knutsunn and Baeryk Astyr. One of the Greggy linebackers had aspirations of cutting Bryndyn's run short, and Torren found himself needing to disabuse the hapless adversary of that notion by way of a pancake block that he quickly moved on from. The beauty of being a lead blocker was that sometimes you caught pursuers off-balance, leading to those truly satisfying blocks.

He continued running, now running alongside Traewyk, seeing another opportunity: a defensive back was streaking towards the tailback, and Torren laughed and dove forward, hammering the defender at the expense of his own footing, tumbling down to the ground together, leaving Bryndyn out of the reach of any other defenders. Hollering and laughing, Bryndyn galloped into the endzone to give the Regulars the lead back. With an easy PAT made, they were leading 33-26. That gave their opponents one more shot, even after the Grid Slaves had allowed them to battle back from a 26-20 deficit.

It had been a long game, and the defense that took the field against the Grid Slaves' offense was already battered and exhausted, gassed from the inability to substitute out. Although fourteen games' worth of practice had done a lot to make that better, it was unavoidable when eleven players took almost the entirety of the defensive snaps. As it was, they had a depressing amount of trouble stopping the at-times stagnant Grid Slaves' offense. It was only a short matter of time before they had been backed up to their own red zone, finding themselves with their backs to a wall, eager not to give up the Regulars' hard-won lead.

It seemed like they were going to cough it up when the Greggys managed to push down to the two-yard line, when they finally caught a break. Piotr Farrangur wrapped up the running back, ripping the ball out of a tight grip on the basis of pure strength and fury, sending it bouncing onto the ground. Instantly, Kyl Waalturs dove on the ball as it rolled into the end zone, sealing the touchback and the win, allowing the offense to run out the clock with a knee.

It put the Regulars in a tough match-up against one of the two teams they had fallen to in their 12-2 group stage campaign, the Kaboomlandian juggernaut. But, perhaps now, with the Regulars having turned a corner, they had a chance. A chance to continue their campaign of redemption.

The Commission already knew they had made a mistake. They had already asked the Regulars to come back next year. But first, they would try to rub in the embarrassment. Nothing would do that the way winning a championship with their diminished squad would.

Picking himself up off the turf after his crushing block, Torren grinned fiercely. Fewer they might be, but it was clear that all teams still had to fear the coming of the Regulars.

by **Kaboomlandia** » Sun Jan 01, 2017 5:19 pm

Phoenix blow out United States of Devonta to advance to quarterfinals

One down, three left to go. The Kaboomlandia Phoenix destroyed the United States of Devonta by a score of 56-29 to advance to only their second quarterfinal in World Bowl history and their first since World Bowl 27. Travis Reuben started, as was expected, and absolutely tore apart Devonta for 438 yards and five touchdowns before being pulled out of the game midway through the third quarter. "The score was big, but we can't sit back because Allamunnic States won't give up this many," noted Reuben in an interview after the game. "I'm happy to see the offense firing on all cylinders going into the quarterfinals." The Phoenix are looking to finally break through in the World Bowl playoffs after three straight cycles of bowing out early, including missing the playoffs completely in the 28th World Bowl, though admittedly that was in the tournament's Group of Death with Banija, Frenline Delpha and Gregoryisgodistan. Andrew Michaels also had a monster game, running for 154 yards and three touchdowns, with Russell Jones just serving to hand off the ball every time after coming into a 42-20 game. The Kaboomlandian defense was adept at stopping Devonta, holding them to just two touchdowns and five field goals in an offensive shootout.

The tone of the game became evident right away, as on only the third play of the game, Phoenix middle linebacker Nathan LaBon forced a fumble off a Devontan running back at their own 20-yard line, leading to an easy touchdown from Reuben. The Devontan defense wasn't inept, but the Phoenix receivers simply had a step or two on their covers every single time, and Andrew Michaels was a bull in the backfield, often gaining 5-6 yards at a time even when going straight up the middle. After a long pass to Manny Hayes made it 14-0, the Devontans finally pulled it together, putting together a long drive that resulted in a ball being punched in from the four-yard line late in the first quarter. But in the second quarter, the Phoenix exerted their will, and it was in this quarter that Reuben put up three passing touchdowns and 200 yards while the defense gave up just a pair of field goals. Veteran receiver Manny Hayes was no slouch in this game, being the beneficiary of fourteen receptions for 180 yards and two touchdowns in the game. At the half, the score was a lopsided 35-13 for the Phoenix.

The second half was no different, as Reuben went right back to work after the kickoff, putting another long drive together to make the score 42-13. It was at this point that Nivek finally pulled his star quarterback out of the game, but Jones simply came in and handed the ball off for the rest of the game. And Michaels still managed to get two more touchdowns in the rest of the game to ice a 56-29 thrashing.

Next up for the Phoenix are Allamunnic States, who survived a hard fought game against Gregoryisgodistan to advance. Can the Phoenix finally advance to the semifinals for the first time in their sixth cycle?

World Bowl XXXI Everything Thread

Grid Corps Bests Frenline Delpha, Officially Qualified

World Bowl XXXI Playoffs To Begin

Who is online