World Cup 73 - RPing Thread

by **Super-Llamaland** » Fri Oct 23, 2015 8:54 pm

QUALIFYING ROUND ONE - RECAP

The Tigers are 3-1-2, good for ten points and third place behind Farfadillis (16) and Crystal Empire (11), and level with Albaie. You couldn't at all call it a good start, but things are looking up for the Llamaneans, whose last three games were all positives - a three-all away draw in Farfadillis, a six-two thrashing of The Enclave, and a heavily rotated one-nil (that should've been three-nil) triumph away at Valkolic.

A few things to note -

TOBYN CLEARWATER IS ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD

Carlton Hoover, after consecutive defeats to Crystal Empire and Cruenatia that are the reason why we'll have a tough road to direct qualification, seemed to have completely lost the support of the team after a verbal tirade after the second consecutive defeat in three matches, reportedly excoriating Lily Stanton for a misplay that cost the team one point (of course, Hoover's tactics and inability to listen to Tobyn Clearwater lost the other two). But Clearwater has shown strong tactics, a knack for substitutions, and, while he's never been outspoken, he manages to lead the group with quiet verve.

In fact, he's managing well enough and gained favor of the players to the point where the LFA is considering keeping him as manager for the rest of the cycle. How Adam Wawrinka deals with it (we've heard plenty of Jeremy Hayes rumors of questionable verity) could change the dynamic of this cup.

LOOK OUT GUYS, YOU'VE GOT COMPANY

The first thing Tobyn Clearwater did was make sure a few new players got onto the shortlist. They're almost all midfielders playing domestically in Super-Llamaland or the former FLULON states surrounding them. Fans should be familiar with Ethan Candelario, but names like Megan Sigurorzson and Jack Saucedo might need explaining.

CANDELARIO is a tough and uncompromising holding midfielder - in many Llamanean systems, he wouldn't find a spot, but he's gotten himself onto the Centre for Excellence, an Apoxian youth program with international regard. Ethan Candelario, at twenty, has already shown a capability for quick instincts and short passes, and that combined with strong defense could make him an option.

SIGURORZSON, in stark contrast, is one of the best generals this author has ever seen. She has a very good vision of how the game is progressing and what next to do, and she's athletic as well. This sounds like Stefan Bogusevic, and I'll be first to admit that Bogusevic hasn't been doing very well - but Sigurorzson's technique is passable, and she's very good on short balls. Also explosive enough to play around the wings, and a good tournament player to have around. The only barrier that kept her from the side beforehand is the fact that her Llamanean citizenship, having been born in Hakifao - at thirty, she's hardly young either.

SAUCEDO is basically a left-footed Michael de Vries. He's creative enough to fit into the mold, but occasionally his positioning leaves huge gaps that high-caliber opponents can rip apart and he's not fast enough to cover them in time. Despite a lack of real offensive threat, he's not great when parking the bus. Still, sometimes you need a player with a decent pass and shot. Don't play him against Farfadillis or he'll collapse.

SOME GLARING LACK OF FORM

No goals or assists - it just hasn't been Lily Stanton's cup, and she's only still in because of a lack of depth on the wings. If Clearwater is to back away from Stanton now, and make it difficult to play Sebastian Inriquez without an asymmetrical lineup, he'll need to put in either the untested Josva Rasmussen, or the unexciting Orson Kerraway, who has suffered from more injury problems (luckily for his new club, none of them have been there).

Another player who hasn't made a mark? Shockingly, it's Tristan Karnstedt. The ex-star, still twenty-four with ample time to turn things around, was known last cycle for his explosiveness and versatility on the right-wing. He was always in position, and could always shake a few defenders with a flashy style that made fans think of Jared Mullin. This Cup though, he's been distinctly average. A poor show.

WHO IS OUR FIRST-CHOICE ELEVEN?

It's hard to make the argument that Stanton still belongs, but Sebastian Inriquez has been having a good enough cup to stay in so we'll keep her. If Clearwater sticks to his guns with the 4-2-2-2, expect this lineup:
KUDLOWSKI;CARMICHAEL,MYERS,SMITH-REYNOLDS,ZHOU;RABURN,SIGURORZSON;STANTON,INRIQUEZ;CARTWRIGHT,NILSSEN.
If we get a switch to the 4-3-3, expect this:
KUDLOWSKI;CARMICHAEL,MYERS,SMITH-REYNOLDS,KARNSTEDT;RABURN,BOGUSEVIC,SIGURORZSON;STANTON,CARTWRIGHT,INRIQUEZ

Where Karnstedt's explosive potential. lets him stay in for now.

Both are solid lineups. I think we have a second-half comeback in us.

ANSEL PENBROOKE SET TO MAKE DEBUT AGAINST ALBAIE

Teenage striker wunderkind Ansel Penbrooke is going to get his first WCQ cap against Albaie tomorrow night. The seventeen-year-old's career has consisted of just one friendly, which was later cancelled. Penbrooke is an athletic, if raw, striker that just oozes potential. A heavily rotated side will face Albaie, consisting of a new-look 4-3-3 and a few players making their NT debuts.

GK - McKenzie FERGUSON
LB - Steven MENG
CB - Adrian CARMICHAEL
CB - James SMITH-REYNOLDS
RB - Adam BAY
LM - Megan SIGURORZSON
CM - Ethan CANDELARIO
RM - Michael DE VRIES
WL - Josva RASMUSSEN
ST - Ansel PENRBOOKE
WR - Alistair QUIRK

by **Carialus** » Fri Oct 23, 2015 8:54 pm

Carialus Clairon
Stalling

Carialus was flying through qualifying. They were 4-0-0 by Matchday Five. Suddenly, the Comrades slipped. By the mid-qualifying break, Carialus was 4-1-1 and nations were biting at the Comrades' heals to take the playoff position.

Carialus played number one seed Turori for Matchday Six. In their own Capital Field, Carialus was given a thrashing. The connections between the team members on the pitch was broken as Turori intercepted passes and destroyed team chemistry. The Island Emirate scored two goals in the first half. Carialus tried to salvage their desperate situation, but fell short. Courtemanche, the tall Carialite defenseman, scored his second goal of qualifying. Courtemanche knocked the ball in off of a corner from Echeverri. Sadly, the goal would not matter much since Carialus lost 2-1.

After the first shattering loss in qualifying, Carialus travelled to the Scottopian Isles. It was hoped that this would be a cool down game, a nice friendly that would close out the me first half of qualifying. Instead, Carialus got a grinding game that ended without a winner. Carialus dominated the 288th ranked side in the first half, which was when Babin scored off of a strike straight to the corner of the net. However, Scottopian Isles came roaring back to life and eventually equalized. That goal devastated Carialus and fractured their waining confidence. As a result, Carialus drew Scottopian Isles one all and now face a tough matchup against fellow the fellow Esportivans: Star United States. The Comrades defeated the Starians at Capital Field, but the Carialus will have to play the return leg in Star United States, a prospect that now casts Carialus' qualifying prospects in deep question.

by **San Jose Guayabal** » Fri Oct 23, 2015 8:59 pm

www.elnacional.gu/sjg/economia_y_negocios/digitalizacion/id=255400

You are in: El nacional > SJG > Economy and Business > Digitalization.

E-Residency and E-Money proposals accepted in National Referendum

Wrote by: Tulio Pereira
26/9/2203, 23:05 - San Salvador Time

People in Estanzuelas voting in September 23rd Referendum

On Friday September 23, went to the polls for the referendum voters 45,050,762 digitization of the economy and residence Guayabalense According to Jorge Machado, president of the Royal Court of Elections, making about 95% of registered voters, with a record in every election held in San Jose Guayabal according notify Machado to this in the press room of the TRE, on that day press were subjected to public scrutiny two bills, which required more than half of the voters to be approved, Unlike other proposals that require lower percentage due to the laws of priority and thematic referendum established since the end of 2193 in our country, under laws were: "The Law of Virtual Residence" and "The Law of Monetarisation Digital, which They were sent to after collecting 250,000 legislation to the first proposal and 380.505 for the second referendum.

As to the first law, the Virtual Residence is a tool to provide people more access to the services that the government offers through this tool as proposed can be acquired in all municipal mayors Guayabalenses and consulates or embassies abroad at a price of C $ 10 Crowns and would be available for foreigners who want to invest or perform procedures in San Jose Guayabal. According to Gerardo Ortiz, the main driver of the bill indicates that the creation of a Virtual Residence "would facilitate greatly the people's participation in government would further streamline the government system and would give foreigners a knack for Investments in San Jose Guayabal. "The basis of the system is carried out through data encryption and continuous improvement of the safety of the web platform of e-government in order to ensure the inviolability of the data and Virtual Residents include a panel of civilian administrators in order to advocate for the privacy of each resident and Virtual avoid capture information that is not necessary for processing.

Between what you can do with the tool of the Virtual Private statement virtual tax, transaction of money to different people is making use of bank accounts, apply for permission to hold demonstrations, collecting virtual signatures for referendum, to establish a company or business San Jose Guayabal in a process which analysts do not take more than one day to be accepted by the relevant authorities and always when a planned or already suitable for physical settlement company you have, putting our country at the forefront of entrepreneurship and elimination of red tape, digital signature, which will have the same value as one made with handwriting and other services such as creating forums where different e-residents may contact the government more efficiently about procurement of services, complaints, suggestions, etc. and even a portal to purchase various goods, the portal will be managed by different companies in the conglomerate of Private Enterprise in San Jose Guayabal and members of the National Chamber of Commerce.

As for the second proposal, the Digital Monetisation is the use of money without having to be presented in physical at national level and not in places as currently used, this law provides for the use of cell phones, debit cards or credit or other virtual payment transaction for the acquisition of any property that is made to all over the Kingdom, as the main driver, Carolina Zepeda, digital monetization "implies not leave the money in physical or force the people to use digital money, considering that some people do not trust banks or just do not like to use digital media, so a movement of capital in physical and virtual is proposed in order to facilitate payments and provide more ways transaction of goods to the public. "

The electronic money will be used on different technological applications previously certified by security companies and the national government where ensure privacy and data encryption to prevent data leakage and subsequent fraud, scams or that capital flight seriously harm the economy of the people, it is expected an investment of at least C $ 24 million crowns in investment for security and at least C $ 62 million to launch the applications of digital commerce and virtual currency, can continue also using cards debit and credit banks, credit unions, and even store them in a mixed system by the government and community cooperatives authorized to receive funds from the public to save money and remove with national identity or Virtual Private plus a customizable pin for power make available to any interested person a virtual capital of the same value as the physical, also ensuring competitive and realistic interest at market currencies San Jose Guayabal.

As for the referendum, 46,056,899 people eligible to cast vote, of which 95% voted the first proposal was approved by 70% of the population, still largely accepted in the Midwest were recorded, where the average was 89 % while in the east was where the lowest acceptance average 60% and in the West with 62% acceptance obtained, while in the second proposal, 97.2% of the population accepted the proposal, reaching 100% in the central and eastern regions, while in the center, 91% accepted the proposal, 6% came out against and 3% abstained.

According to the representative of the National Chamber of Commerce, Engineer Ricardo Rojas, this is "an important step forward in the digitization and accessibility of government services and goods transaction with investment in the Kingdom, being key tools to strengthen search economic growth currently held in San Jose Guayabal and if possible increase it to provide more prosperity and investments to San Jose Guayabal God willing, an important step for our country, "concluded Rojas.

by **San Llera** » Fri Oct 23, 2015 9:00 pm

The Player Bracket

Welcome, it is the long-anticipated final chapter of The Player Bracket! Today, starting with the Elite Eight, we will find out who will rise to the top and be crowned the best player in the world. Shall we get started? Here are the match ups:

Let's not waste time.

- Pasarga (1) vs (8) Valanora -

Players: CM Csaszar Mor (Pasarga) vs ST Laborious Hawk (Valanora)
Analysis: Csaszar Mor lifted the World Cup in the last cycle, and that undoubtedly hasn't hurt his chances here. However, it isn't as if Vanorian striker Laborious Hawk hasn't tasted World Cup glory either, he's played on several cup-winning teams. Mor may be the best player on the best team, but now he faces someone in their prime (a very long prime) whose been the best player on many best teams.
Winner: The Winner is Laborious Hawk.

- Eura (2) vs (58) Associated Godlands -

Players: CAM Craig Sinclair (Eura) vs CAM The Lord and Savior Jesus Christ (Associated Godlands)
Analysis: Jesus's scoring record is very impressive, I can't deny that. And Associated Godlands aren't exactly the cream of Rushmore's crop, but they wouldn't even be harvested if not for him. I know all that. But to be one of the top four players, one must lead their team to some success - not just a lousy Cup of Harmony showing. And now Jesus faces a player with comparable ability.
Winner: Eura was second last World Cup, because of Sinclair.

- Nephara (3) vs (27) Krytenia -

Players: CM Elaine Ashdown (Nephara) vs ST Valrauncion (Krytenia)
Analysis: Elaine Ashdown is now faced up against an elf. We at Viva Dicce had long discussions over whether longevity should come into play here, the consensus was "very little". So I am left to mostly judge on how these players are performing now, in which case it is a very close one.
Winner: But it's very narrowly going to Valrauncion.

- Osarius (5) vs (13) San Jose Guayabal -

Players: GK Efrain Suarez (Osarius) vs ST Rodolfo Zelaya (San Jose Guayabal)
Analysis: Rodolfo Zelaya is like a machine. He whirs with excitement when turned on. He does everything so clinically, so well. He buzzes around the pitch with unstoppable pace, world class technique, and a strong nose for the game.
Winner: Unfortunately, he doesn't quite match the consistency of Suarez.

That's it for the quarters. Let us move on to the semis:

- Valanora (8) vs (5) Osarius -

Players: ST Laborious Hawk (Valanora) vs GK Efrain Suarez (Osarius)
Analysis: In the first semifinal, we have on one side the best goalkeeper in the world, playing for a team who recently won the title consecutively. Then, we have Laborious Hawk, so good that up-and-coming reporters like Marco Brelli fail to find the prose to describe him, he's that good. Too good for Suarez.
Winner: Our first finalist... Laborious Hawk.

- Eura (2) vs (27) Krytenia -

Players: CAM Craig Sinclair (Eura) vs ST Valrauncion (Krytenia)
Analysis: Two elite players, well-known to the soccer community and the multiverse, face off for a spot in the final. Craig Sinclair is a master orchestrator of attack, someone who is so dangerous in so many ways that defenders have no idea what to defend. Valrauncion is also pretty good, scoring heaps and heaps of goals as well as generating gigantic transfer fees.
Winner: A close one, but Sinclair wins and we avoid an elf-on-elf final.

Finally, we've reached the point where two players are going to square off to be crowned Viva Dicce's best in the world. Without further ado, the final!

Wow! That was a long journey. Congratulations to the winner, commiserations to the loser, and thank you for reading! I'm Marco Brelli of Viva Dicce.

by **The Royal Kingdom of Quebec** » Fri Oct 23, 2015 10:04 pm

MATCHDAY 8 RP CUTOFF - GROUPS 11-20

Can you produce an RP that good to impress any reader?

by **Gim** » Fri Oct 23, 2015 10:11 pm

WATV - Monday ~ Sunday 8:30-9:00

Host: Jo Jin Ri

Camera is at an aerial view of the studio with Anchorwoman Jo Jin Ri in the center of the studio.

"Hello, I'm Jo Jin Ri of WATV 9 Sports News. Tonight is a rematch of the two teams in Group 5: Gim versus Swilatia. The first group match of Gim was against Swilatia, and they were able to defeat them with a score of 2-1. Will they be able to repeat another victory against them? Well, let's find out."

Camera turns to the Gimian and Swilatian players entering the football field.

"15th minute. Kim Dong Jin makes a nifty pass to Gimian forward Heo Min Soo and Heo shoots the ball from left of the outside of penalty zone and the ball bounces off the head of a Swilatian defenseman and past the goalkeeper. 1-0 Gim."

Camera turns to the Swilatian players attacking in the Gimian zone.

"28th minute. A Swilatian player makes a corner kick, and the Swilatian forward heads the ball, which hits the leg of Gimian defenseman Son Kyu Jin and deflects into the net. 1-1 tied."

Camera turns to the Gimian players attacking in the Swilatian zone.

"76th minute. Now, we have never seen any skillful offensive strike by the Gimian players. Well, have a look at this one. Choi Nam receives a pass from Gimian midfielder Yang Joon. He rushes towards the left of the Swilatian penalty zone. He dribbles the ball to the opposite side, shoots,...and goal! Oh, what a strike by Choi Nam! 2-1 Gim!"

Camera turns to the Gimian and Swilatian players shaking hands and exchanging jerseys.

"Full-time whistle has blown. 2-1 Gim. Gimians win twice against Swilatia and get their third victory in the tournament."

by **Nephara** » Fri Oct 23, 2015 10:19 pm

The early shower wasn't just a metaphor. It was the best place to hide.
Tanya Bottlegreen punched the crumbling walls and swore. Loudly. So much, then, for that. When Nephara had needed her most... she'd grabbed their fullback by the throat.
Not that the prick hadn't deserved it. Always niggling, always bitching to the referee, very free with his elbows. He hadn't been caught, either. Bottlegreen had, well, tried to strangle him two feet in front of the linesman, so that hadn't gone so well for her. 0-0 in ... fuck, when had it happened? The 34th minute or thereabouts?
Shit.
If they failed to win here it would take a frankly outrageous reversal of fortunes to get back to the summit, where the Nepharim felt they deserved to be. I mean, this was fucking Maretta. Nobody else that mattered was losing points here.
It had been going okay until then. Covenant was looking dangerous and Beckcamp had flashed a shot just over the bar, Maretta's goalkeeper had made a few saves and Ballard hadn't been tested at all. Bottlegreen herself had come close a couple of times, just not quite stuck the ball in the net. The goal had been inevitable, until she'd fucked it all up.
It wasn't fair.
Such a juvenile thought, but it resonated. Nephara was finally getting somewhere, rumblings coming up again of how this might just be their year, and now this shit. Even fucking Brenecia had won all their games! Everyone knew Nephara was good enough now, and now that Nephara was good enough it had suddenly and dramatically become shit.
The hot water was her only comfort n- well, no. The lukewarm, inconsistent water was her only comfort. The chanting of the home crowd sure as hell wasn't.
And then... it stopped?
Abruptly, the chants ended, replaced by a flurry of activity, muttering and swearing. "That was offside! Tell me that was bloody offside!"
The speakers boomed, with a reluctant PA on the other end. "Goal, to Andrea Cawdor. Maretta 0-1 Nephara." His tone was hardly enthusiastic.
Bottlegreen smiled, and leaned back on the crumbling walls. Maybe things would turn out okay in the end after all.

Last.fm · by **Cosumar** » Fri Oct 23, 2015 11:07 pm

A GUIDE TO THE COSUMARITE SPACE COLONIES

The Cosumarite people have always had their eyes cast to the skies. Some of the oldest tales that have passed down through the generations relate to the infinite beyond and what it might hold. It was this wanderlust and thirst for knowledge that extended our civilization to the stars sooner than most. In this series, I will profile each of the major extraterrestrial celestial bodies with colonies that fall under the Cosumarite crown. Colloquially referred to as "The Colonies", these seven diverse and far-flung places are now a vital part of the Cosumarite culture and economy and are represented as equals to the home-world Fiefs at Congress in Ramusok. Beyond the seven full "Class 1" colonies covered in this series, there are dozens of smaller Cosumarite outposts and stations scattered amongst the stars.

Continued from World Cup 72:
#1 - Nuur
#2 - Fevelo
#3 - Regéla
#4 - Kalloroda
#5 - Varvonti

#6 - REXNOR

Rexnor is a sprawling industrial city in the nearby Hastighet Star System on a planet designated as Hastighet A. Even though Rexnor is just the name of the settlement, the planet itself has become known as Rexnor by default. It is a medium-sized rocky planet, much like Earth with a small ocean. Barren now, but thought by scientists to have once sustained complex life in its ancient past. The indigenous civilization scorched itself, all other species and the planet's oceans to oblivion in some sort of disaster. When Cosumar Space Exploration Agency (SEA) probe ships showed up a few thousand years later, they found that the atmosphere had repaired itself and the oceans had just started to rebound within the last few millennia. But most of all, they found a perfectly habitable surface that was still completely devoid of life. Completely unclaimed. It was the perfect combination for all kinds of corporations. Earthlike and accommodating, but without the pesky lifeforms that tend to accompany such planets and trigger all sorts of rules and restraints. Congress couldn't very well accuse you of impeding on indigenous life (always a constant battle for interstellar corporations) if there was not a any life to endanger. The previous inhabitants of this "Earth" had destroyed themselves on their own, leaving behind a vast surface on which to build with no interfering regulations. This, combined with the Hastighet System's proximity to our own solar system (a mere 10 light years away) has made Rexnor the most populous and fastest-growing Cosumarite colony despite being one of the newest. While "dirty industry" (chemical, mining, energy, manufacturing, etc.) still represents the heartbeat of Rexnor City, people of all kinds are starting to relocate here and forge a new life. Rexnor will always proudly carry its industrial heritage, but within 50 years experts predict that it will be just as diverse as any other Cosumarite city back home. It is divided into nine square Districts, represented by the flag's nine columns.

History: "Hastighet A" was first discovered hundreds of years ago in the early days of exoplanet identification by Rexnor Incorporated, one of the first private space companies in Cosumarite (much like RL SpaceX today). By the time the advent hyperspace travel made it possible to survey the planet in the 900s, Rexnor Inc. had not existed for a century - but their name obviously lives on as a tribute to the discovery. The first and only settlement on the planet, "The Colonial City of Rexnor on the Planetary Body Hastighet A" (its official name), was conceived in 959 as a joint venture between the Cosumarite Ministry of Colonial Development and a coalition of industrial corporations. But it took the two sides several years to come to terms on a

mutually agreeable settlement plan that balanced the corporate interests (leveraging the planet's location and fewer regulations to make it the most profitable interstellar operations hub yet) with the interests of the thousands of colonists the government enlisted to settle the Earthlike planet. The end result was a system similar to what had developed naturally on the volcanic mining moon of Varvonti some years earlier. The Cosumarite government owns the land, installs a local government and some ground rules, and provides Rexnor a seat in the King's Congress to voice concerns and keep tabs on the corporations. In return for complying and being "good boys", the 37 corporations that were part of the venture group were given discount rates to buy plots of land, given more breathing room than usual during development and allowed to control the day-to-day administration of the city. In the city's early days, almost all settlers to Rexnor came to work for these companies in blue-collar factory jobs. The colony's industrial and residential complexes officially began operation in 975 (approximately 30 years ago). Boom. By 985, ten years in, the vast dirt field that had been selected as the site of the giant city-to-be had sprung up into a pulsating steel metropolis. The city's growth was exponential in population and physical size (both outwards and upwards). Today, Rexnor City is famous for its towering skyscrapers (left) that protrude from the clouds of smog to form Cosumar's grandest extraterrestrial skyline.

Industry: But it wasn't all smooth sailing. In 987, an explosion at an ion cannon factory unleashed a devastating fire on the city that destroyed much of Districts 4 and 5, claiming 49 lives an injuring 500 others. Now known as The Fire of '87, it is the most famous industrial accident of Rexnor, but far from the only. In 990, a toxic gas leak from an ICMI chemical plant killed 13 and caused birth defects in the children of some survivors. In 993, a nuclear-powered automated factory had a partial meltdown, infecting several hundred people in District 9 with radiation. Most recently, in 1001 an expose study by The Ramusok Journal determined that the air in many parts of Rexnor is so polluted that it's not safely breathable and has caused increased rates of lung cancer and asthma among longtime residents. The hot debate topic in Cosumar right now is whether Congress should start to apply the same regulatory safety standards to Rexnor that it does to businesses in other colonies and mainland Cosumar. Right now, businesses are flocking to Rexnor because it is the only locale under the Cosumarite banner where our government, normally extremely "Green", has turned a blind eye to dirty industry practices, pollution and waste. But with the City now diversified from its industrial roots and starting to attract more upscale, white-collar and family-oriented demographics, there has been pressure to bring Rexnor closer to strict standards by which the rest of Cosumar abides. It's a tricky subject, however. Rexnor City is Cosumar's largest manufacturer of spacecraft, computing parts, and construction materials. All kinds of materials, from complex chemicals pumped by pipeline (see right) to massive tanker ships, to textiles, to solar panels, are manufactured in Rexnor City. The rest of the Cosumar depends on the efficient production of these resources, and any interfering environmental legislation on Rexnor could harm our economy and force us to make up for it by relaxing the strict cleanliness standards back home.

Geology & Climate: Geologically, the planet is composed of a molten core with a rocky mantle and a silicate rock crust. At its poles are huge ice caps that are popular spots for wealthy tourists. Much of the surface is flat and barren, covered by dirt or rock, all vegetation having been killed off in the extinction event that wiped out the indigenous civilization an estimated 1 million years ago. The atmosphere has only recently restored itself to its former state after a long process, thanks to the Western Ocean partially surviving and keeping liquid water on the planet, allowing the Water Cycle to renew and slowly rebuild Rexnor's atmospheric balance and habitability. Large dried-out basins exist where more ocean once was. Some of Cosumar's finest engineers are working on a way to expedite the process and get water flowing through Rexnor's bone-dry riverbeds and ocean basins again. Other natural features include mountains and underground caverns (a popular place to dump toxic waste). Rexnor City is equatorial, so climate is usually warm and sunny, but not unpleasantly so. Temperatures range from as low as 40F in the winter to as high as 90F in the summer. Other, uninhabited regions of the planet vary.

Life: None at present. Exhaustive searches on and under the surface have returned zero lifeform readings. Fossil records on Rexnor indicate that the planet supported a variety of life forms, estimated at 87% of Earth's own biodiversity, for most of its history until a single disastrous event just over 1 million years ago. A sentient species, given the name Hastighetians, evolved 1.55 million years ago. After a few hundred thousand years, this race is believed to have reached a point of technological achievement even more advanced than present-day Cosumar. Their demise is hypothesized to have been caused by an artificial Gamma Ray blast (illustrated left) in their own upper-atmosphere. Though relatively small and over in milliseconds, the sheer energy of the burst was devastating for the planet's Ozone layer. 65% of the planet's life is believed to have perished instantly, the rest perished within days or weeks from radiation poisoning. Any surviving Hatighetians beyond that point likely slowly starved out or burnt up by the suddenly hotter conditions. The reason for the blast is unknown, but experts believe it was likely an accident - a scientific experiment or technological process gone wrong. It's a humbling caution for our own civilization as we progress forward into similarly dangerous scientific advancements.

Settlements: There's just one massive settlement, Rexnor City. Population 11 million. The city itself is perfectly square in shape, organized into nine square Districts within, with are further subdivided into four quadrants each, and meticulously subdivided into a grid of individual square blocks beyond that. To the right, you can see the gridlike cityscape from space. Even though it's just a number attached to a square within a square, home Districts are matters of particular pride for the people of Rexnor. And even though you usually can't even tell when you passed from one District into another, each has its own subtle cultural differences - usually tied to the types of companies within. For example, District 1 is where many communications companies have factories. A large percentage of District 1 residents are employed by entities such as StarComm (Cosumar's largest producer of long-range transmitters for starships) or Kulluk (a large HoloTV company that builds their satellites there). The central square, District 5, contains the colonial government and administration, as well as most of the city's banks and essential functions like hospitals. Thus, they are stereotyped as soft bureaucrats and toffee-nosed offworlders by the outer districts, which tend to house the industrial labor-intensive jobs. Of course, they are stereotyped as uneducated ruffians by those in District 5... Such rivalries exist between all the Districts, though it is (mostly) all good-spirited. Rexnorites of all locales take great pride together in their thriving colony. The nine districts are listed below by population.

1. District 9 - 1,700,000
2. District 3 - 1,550,000
3. District 4 - 1,390,000
4. District 2 - 1,300,000
5. District 7 - 1,220,000
6. District 6 - 1,180,000
7. District 8 - 1,090,000
8. District 1 - 930,000
9. District 5 - 700,000

And most importantly, soccer: Of course, inter-district passion carries over into soccer, the most passionate sport there is. Each of the nine districts has one professional club. All nine are simply named "Rexnor District X Athletic Club", though they have individualized nicknames and colors. District 3 (logo left) is currently the highest Rexnorite club up the Cosumarite pyramid, competing in TredjeLigan, the third tier. Yes, all the Districts have similarly simplistic crests. The other eight districts, however, compete in the much less prestigious fifth tier (Laegre Ligan 2). District 3 has not always been so much better than its neighbors. Their current ascent of superiority is a recent phenomenon, ever since ICMI (yes, the same corporation that sponsors the HarlighetLigan - they have two facilities in District 3) purchased a share of the club three years ago. They invested heavily in the club in hopes that success on the pitch would drive up the District's land value. If they can earn promotion to SekundarLigan, it would be a massive and unprecedented achievement. District 3 would be the first Rexnorite team in the second division EVER and one of only two extraterrestrial sides there currently (the other being Regéla United). Aside from District 3, the best-looking team last year was District 5. They finished 5th out of 30 in the LL2, higher than any of the other clubs from the planet though it was not enough for promotion to LL1 (fourth-division). No citizen of Rexnor has ever been capped by the Cosumar National Team. At the moment, bright Rexnor District 3 prospect Atticus Hattingh seems the most likely to change that someday as a 17-year-old defender already dominant in TredjeLigan.

Mid-Qual Friendly: "5-4 shootout between AO rivals Quebec and Cosumar thrills capacity crowd at CSKA Stadium"
Cosumar: Na'Noni 2', Öhman 56', Newman 71', Kvanderwyk 80'
The Royal Kingdom of Quebec: Kontiola 6', Gelinas 14' + 44', Di Maria 52', Shin 85'
Subs used: Kvanderwyk, Lilley, Farsgaard

Mid-Qual Friendly: "Engström shines for Cosumar against Aqmuland in first match between the two nations"
Cosumar: Engström 42' + 53', Newman 62', Kvanderwyk 79'
New North Aqmuland: 52', 86'
Subs used: Kvanderwyk, Senturk, Everdale

MD8: "Cosumar vanquish Hodife 7-2 as a statement of intent for second half of Qualifying"
Cosumar: Engström 25' + 51', Hodife Own Goal 36', Newman 48' + 77', Kvanderwyk 68', Lilley 90'
Hodife: 16', 44'
Subs used: Lilley, Kvanderwyk, Elam

Cosumar's World Cup 73 Journey
Pre-Qual Friendly: Cosumar 1-1 Super-Llamaland
Pre-Qual Friendly: San Jose Guayabal 6-2 Cosumar
Matchday 1: Cosumar 2-0 Hodife
Matchday 2: The Fallenmark Islands 0-3 Cosumar
Matchday 3: Cosumar 5-2 Wazekia
Matchday 4: Alpha Gamma Kappa 0-2 Cosumar
Matchday 5: Bye
Matchday 6: Cosumar 2-3 Valanora
Matchday 7: Taeshan 1-0 Cosumar
Mid-Qual Friendly: The Royal Kingdom of Quebec 5-4 Cosumar
Mid-Qual Friendly: Cosumar 4-2 New North Aqmuland
Matchday 8: Hodife 2-7 Cosumar
Matchday 9: Cosumar vs. The Fallenmark Islands (@ Leviathan Arena, Kaldukosic, Cosumar)
Matchday 10: Wazekia vs. Cosumar
Matchday 11: Cosumar vs. Alpha Kappa Gamma (@ Leviathan Arena, Kaldukosic, Cosumar)
Matchday 12: Bye
Matchday 13: Valanora vs. Cosumar (@ Hatire Memorial, Island of Capri)
Matchday 14: Cosumar vs. Taeshan ( @ Leviathan Arena, Kaldukosic, Cosumar)
Blue: Draw
Green: Victory
Red: Defeat
Home team listed first

Cosumar Goal-Scorers Tally (including friendlies)
Ace Newman (6)
Anders Engström (5)
Ole Öhman (4)
Belarmin Worsaw (4)
Kit Kvanderwyk (3)
Vareza Na'Noni (2)
Tevin Lilley (2)
Mauricio Sigler (1)
Darwyn Lucassen (1)
Aziz Senturk (1)
Jacob Pandan (1)
Augen Wittevrongel (1)

Cosumar Assists Tally
Mauricio Sigler (5)
Sheldon Serra (3)
Anders Engström (3)
Darwyn Lucassen (3)
Tevin Lilley (2)
Maynard Gorham (1)
Vareza Na'Noni (1)
Ace Newman (1)
Kyron Everdale (1)
Kit Kvanderwyk (1)

Substitute Appearances Tally
Kit Kvanderwyk (7)
Tevin Lilley (6)
Belarmin Worsaw (4)
Aziz Senturk (3)
Kyron Everdale (3)
Tiffany Elam (3)
Arndu Farsgaard (2)
Senter Senterekoesima (2)
Olaf Womack (1)
Tomasso Tenebrosa (1)
Augen Wittevrongel (1)

by **The Sword Bloke** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 2:19 am

THE SWORD BLOKE 5-1 NATANIANS & NOSTS LIVE COVERAGE

"Hello, I'm Shop Owner, the best person on earth. I'm here with a live coverage of the World Cup Qualifier between the Swordeans and the... Uh... Nosts. Here in Group 16. The Swordeans are ranked 2nd in Group 16, with the second half of qualifiers about to begin. Here we go, from some smelly stadium who's name I just forgot..."

"OK, Kondrii & Haigh kick off... Haigh is running down the pitch... Hayward is forward. 18 seconds in, and Haigh passes to Kondrii... Oh my Me, he's about to score. Surely he is... Kondrii passes to Hayward, and Hayward chips over the goalie, and OOH YEA! YES SON! THE SWORDEANS ARE AHEAD! 44 SECONDS IN, AND HAYWARD CHIPS OVER THE GOALIE'S HEAD, WHERE HAIGH HEADS IT IN! QUICKEST GOAL IN SWORDEAN HISTORY, AS A MATTER OF FACT!"

"And those horrid Nosts are about to kick off. Down 1-0 versus the best defense in the World Cup, the Swordeans are men on a mission. Captain Hayward passes to Antle, who passes forward to Haigh... 4 minutes in... And Haigh is way offside. Hopefully the Swordeans make it to the Cup Proper this round, hey?"

"The Natanian Goalie has the ball. He kicks it to some defender... Who is taking a selfie with a crowd member. Nice guy for the Nosts, but because of his decision, it's out! 8 minutes through, chance for the Swordeans to take a bigger lead from here. Just need Haklim to lead from the net..."

"18 Minutes through. That guy who was taking the selfie earlier has part of his shirt ripped off from the selfie. We don't know any Natanian player names at all... That's right folks, we don't know their names at all... That guy who has his shirt ripped off kicks it straight into the chest of Haklim. Haklim bombs it down to Haigh, 19 minutes through. Haigh passes to Kondrii... KONDRII GETS THE VOLLEY! TWO TO NIL SWORDEANS! And Kondrii does a backflip. Has a good reason to, doesn't he?"

"33 Minutes through, and Hayward tackles a Natanian striker down. Yellow card for Hayward, good tackle though. Penalty, as the tackle was considered to be inside the box. And that guy with his shirt ripped off converts a penalty past George Haklim. Not a happy man, 2-1 the way of the RedWhites."

"And it is half time. Which means it's time for the Swordy Swordy Sword Swallower, the mascot of the Swordean foray into the 73rd World Cup. How many Swords? One... Two... Three... And it turns out he has SEVENTY-SIX Swords in his mouth! That is why he is our mascot, guys. What a person he is. Awesome mascot. Just got some half time news: Jells Kondrii has a sore calf, but he'll try to play. Would be a blow if he comes off, but he won't... He's a Swordean."

"OK. And the Natanians kick it off... Only to be immediately tackle by the Swordeans. Immidiate play by the Swordeans is to pass it to Darwin. Darwin runs past the Nost goalkeeper... AND HE TAPS IT IN! 46TH MINUTE! 3-1 SWORDEANS! WHAT A WAY TO GET STARTED, FOLKS! THIS POST-GOAL SCREAMING SPONSORED BY THE ANGELOU EXECUTION FACTORY; GET BOX SEATS TO ALL DAILY EXECUTIONS FOR 12 MONTHS FOR ONLY $1,000,000 SWORDEAN DOLLARS!!!!!"

"So just 65 seconds after kicking it off for the half, the Nosts will do it after a goal this time. They accidently pass it to a Swordean; Darwin. *TWENTY MINUTES LATER* The Swordeans have had 92% of the possession in the last 20 minutes. 66th minute..."

"Darwin has the ball, passes to Haigh. Haigh chips it to Kondrii. Some Natanian defender did some showboating, trying to get a scissor kick back to his goalie. It doesn't work, and Kondrii passes to Ryan Hayward. The goalie runs past Hayward, so Hayward just runs more, and taps it into goal. 68th minute goal! YES BOYS! 4-1 UP THANKS TO CAPTAIN DEFENCE!! OOH YEA! THIS NATANIAN FRIED CHICKEN TASTES AVERAGE! WE ARE WINNING 4-1, GUYS!"

"So, it's the 85th minute. That Natanian guy with part of his shirt ripped off has the ball, and he tries to pass it to his goalie. Jells Kondrii is sliding along the wet ground. The ball touches his foot... AND IT GOES IN! SOME RANDOM SLIDING CAUSES A 5-1 LEAD! NATANIANS AND NOSTS HAVE NOTHING TO DO BUT REGRET DEFEAT! JELLS 'KILLER' KONDRII HAS A DOUBLE! WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS, WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS...!"

"And it is full time. The Swordeans get a 3 point advantage over Associated Godlands, putting them in 2nd in Group 16. A playoff spot or even automatic qualification looms for the Swordeans, Ownerists, RedWhites, My Army, whatever you call them. Next we have a bye, before facing the Associated Land of Rejected Gods called Associated Godlands in Matchday 10. I am Shop Owner from some smelly Natanian stadium. The Swordeans have won 5-1."

To: Jeruselum Football Association
From: Shop Owner

Dear Jeruselum Football Association,
Please note that in future games in The Sword Bloke, due to one of your players labelling the Swordean hospitals as weird, your football team is banned from entering Swordean hospitals unless the player who did state such words apologises to us.
Please take this into account from now on.
Thanks, Shop Owner.

Shop Owner
32 Owner Drive, Government Estate
Owner Heights
Angelou, ANGL
The Sword Bloke, Esportiva
27975

by **Electrum** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 2:39 am

Our Electrum - Arts and Culture
by Alexandra Dupree

Governance Part 1 - Part 2

It's fair to say that we regard ourselves as very cultured, with local governments being more concerned with artistic installations rather than providing local government services and the widespread popularity of music in all its forms across Electrum. Each city exists within its microcosm so it's impossible to cover them all, with their different art scenes, music styles and dramatic works. In Electrum at least, federal government funding for arts is done within the Department of Sports, the Arts, Culture and the Olympics. Arts and Culture are funded by the Arts Electrum, a grants authority which gives funding for various projects and ideas around Electrum. The reason why the government is doing this is stated in it's mission aim: 'To engage and inspire in creativity in new pursuits and ideas.' Although some in the Arts detest that they are lumped in with Sports, the parallels are similar. They are both things to be enjoyed. People pay to come and watch. They stimulate the mind. They access the most primal of our desires.

Art comes in many different mediums and forms. From experimental, avant-garde videography, to photojournalism, artistic pieces in a gallery to traditional Art in the northern reaches of Electrum, there is always something to enjoy for everyone. In Centralis, the most populous city, street art and graffiti are more common, and one can sit there on the streets sipping on coffee outside whilst admiring it. Across to Prescott, and it is where galleries which are where people view art, out of necessity. People want to escape the cold, often harsh winters of Prescott -- what better way to do it by setting up shop inside and looking at some art? In Hamilton, Indigenous art is where is at it's peak, with the austere and mysterious cave paintings and other traditional works. To the far East in Agri, there has been a marked rise in photojournalism, where natural disasters and weather conditions often make for dangerous, yet awe-inspiring photos. Electrumites are pretty accepting of avant-garde art pieces, indeed one of the most popular pieces to date is in Centralis' Museum of Modern Arts, "Red," which is a red canvas with two strips called zips breaking up the red. It just goes to show how far art can go in Electrum.

There's more to art than just the visual. Of course, there are the performance arts as well. The Electrum Symphony Orchestra is based in Centralis and does weekly performances across the entire nation. One such performance is the "Video Game Symphony," wherein they play music from the latest games released by Dream Games. Drama fans might flock to see the Prescott Theater Company, and it's associated musical strip called the "Fairway" where lots of musicals and plays from Shakespeare to Sondheim are performed every day for the audience. Finally, comediennes, who often take the mickey out of the Kale Islanders are across the multiverse. Stand-up comedy is one of the great traditions in Electrum, and after a long day at work, people just want to go to the bar and have a laugh. Again, Centralis gets all the attention here with the Centralis International Comedy Festival running next month.

This is the second part of our series on Electrum life. Alexandra Dupree is our expert writer for this paper, writing on Electrumite culture.

by **Banguela** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 3:23 am

The house was crowded as my wife indicated, slamming pans to get over the noise, that the kabuça was ready. I, in the meanwhile, looked up from the heated conversation with my brother-in-law. They are the type of family member you don’t choose, I guess, but we did have a similar taste it appeared, both in terms of football clubs, food and women, each having married one of a pair of twins. Nisha did not look like your regular football wives and she detested the get-togethers with those at the club, which were a semi-obligated number and in general a great bore.

After a few mishaps, we eventually managed to squeeze us all between one of the chairs and the table. Even if my place, according to Banguelan norms, should be classified as a villa, it was quite a mission to cram that many people in one room. Thirty-four, to be exact, and a similar amount of portions of kabuça, a local, sugary pie, were served. The cause of this stampede was the tradition that a birthday should be celebrated with as many people as the years from the lucky one, something probably invented in the far past to explain the untimely death of the elderly but now a good way to keep children’s parties within boundaries. A genius idea, I think. But if you’ve got kids aged nine, seven and four who moan and cry for truckloads of their friends at their birthday parties, you’ve got to join the drill.

So family and friends were around to toast and wolf down a piece of kabuça on my good health. The outgoing atmosphere had finally calmed down a bit, although I couldn’t but notice that they ate slowly. Was there... Luckily, kids and fools tend to say what a crowd thinks, so my youngest suddenly ...

“Bah, that kabuça is dirty,” Kara screamed.

The lack of commentary indicated that he had been spot on. I tried to taste a bit more and quickly discovered why. A pie from which the recipe said thrice, “now you jug in plenty of sugar and stir”, which did not taste very sweet, had its issues.

”It is true,” Nisha prevented a youth rebellion, ”I’ve tried a new, healthier recipe. Flavio has an important game in three days, so I felt we should all support him in it.”

Not exactly met with much applause, although I saw my parents nod at one another, satisfied with the commitment of their daughter-in-law.

”But...” she continued before watching me, “can I tell them, Flavio?”

I rose with a meagre grin. I would have preferred to keep it indoors a bit longer but, on the other hand, for all those present I would have liked it better if they knew it first-hand and not through the newspaper.

”Luckily for Kara,” I picked up my youngest from the floor, ”Is this the last time we have to eat dirty kabuça.”

I paused, awaiting the reactions. A series of blank stares, only two or three from which the radars in their head slowly started to rotate.

”This will probably be my last season and certainly if we manage to qualify for the Cup of Harmony. Ending my career with such a great tournament would be a nice way to wrap it all up and by the next World Cup, I’ll be 38. And they can’t wait that long for the best kabuça!”

Obviously, all members of the family had to do their personal say about this decision, in general a blueprint from the opinion of the one next to them. When the babbling and buzz had settled a bit, Nisha walked in with the phone.

”It’s for you, Flavio!”
”Oh... Another one who wants to hear how old I am,” I grinned, ”you can give it to me.”
”Take it in the kitchen,” she indicated with her head and a worrisome smile.
”Who is it?” I asked once I stood next to her near the stove.
”Joao. Joao Ferreira.” she ogled the phone as if he was there in person and quite unwanted, ”Does he know already about...”
”My decision,” I completed her sentence, doing a fine effort to sound less worried than I was, ”Not with that many words but I hinted.”

As there was little use in keeping him hanging, I took the phone. Up next the kind of conversation I would have a few dozens of times that day: an amalgam of moderate jokes about my age, some wishes for good health and a great day, discussions of when to meet again and...

”Oh, Flavio,” Joao spoke just as I wanted to end. The tone immediately told me more.
”Yes.”
”There is something I wanted to discuss with you, but maybe we should do it on another day. But I’m gonna break the news anyway, consider it a bit of a birthday present to hear it before anyone else. In a year and a half, the Olympics will be around the corner. Here, at the FA, they have been contemplating participating. Although it’s not obligated, it’s a gentlemen’s tradition to partake with a young team, often U23...”
”You’re a bit too late then,”I laughed to keep my nerves from taking over.
”But...” he continued, ”that with three full internationals added. Three experienced ones from which the young ones can learn. It seems a perfect way to lift the next generation to the international level. A great plan but only viable and useful if we’ve got three great skippers to guide them.”
”And now,” I responded after a long silence, ”you think about me.”
”You read my mind. Well, just think about it, nothing is set in stone yet. Happy birthday!”

I still had the receiver in my hand when Nisha walked in minutes later.

”What did he want?”
”Oh, nothing... Just wishing me a good birthday,” I lied, knowing very well how glad she was I ended my career before an injury did.

The Olympics...

by **Maklohi Vai** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 3:49 am

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: Lumalo Kuranakalapoi
Maklohi Vai Football Association
lmlkrnklpoi@mvfa.gov

Ishmael Walker Dismissed as Manager

The Maklohi Vai Football Association (MVFA) has elected to terminate the Managerial contract of Ishmael Walker, effective immediately. The MVFA thanks Mr. Walker for his service and contributions to Vaian football, and wishes him the best in his future endeavors.

Assistant Manager Poluno Numorokalapani will serve as Interim Manager. The MVFA will conduct a national and regional coaching search to find a new, permanent manager.

by Roberto Jimenez

Earlier today, the Maklohi Vai Football Association announced the firing of Manager Ishmael Walker. We bring you the reactions of people in and out of Vaian football.

"He did his best, I think, but the team hasn't been putting in the effort. Like really, really not putting in the effort. They seem lazy, lackadaisical, like they don't care." - Munokolo Wotaralakapakai, Wakita Enquirer beat writer exasperated that I had to ask him to repeat this quote (sorry)

"It's not surprising. He wasn't doing his job in the locker room to motivate the team." - source close to the team, anonymous

"I don't give a damn, really. Football is not our primary concern right now." - Lomani Kulanakaparamulotokanai, Tamolaki resident peeved that I stopped her in the middle of a good smoke

"He's better off somewhere else, regardless of the job he did here. The talent he has is not to be wasted on this sorry group of players you call a team." - Juxal Eyucandala, Siroyese football analyst experiencing schadenfreude

"¿Que, mijo?" - my mother, a 76 year-old woman who doesn't know what I really do for a living because I won't tell her for fear of being disowned

"Walker was a good hire, and this was a good fire. Solid job by the MVFA." - Ulako Davidson, Wakita resident oddly emboldened by the news

"... Ok." - Ma'ana Molukarakapai, Wakita resident who just wants to get back to texting her friends

by **Jeruselem** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 4:20 am

Princess Laura looking unhappy after San Jose Guayabal beat them 4-1 at Dazza Dallas Stadium

Laura: Well, that was a train wreck Mum.
Amy: We were playing the top seed, they were expected to win. They haven't lost a game since we beat them at home.
Laura: Still, we're like 6 points behind them now
Amy: I fully expect San Jose Guayabal to top the group anyway
Laura: We can't afford to lose another game, we've lost three in a row
Amy: I know

Laura: At least I contributed a goal today
Amy: San Jose Guayabal are best team in the group really
Laura: Hang on, we have a bye next don't we?
Amy: I think so, but we'll still be 5th on the table
Laura: Let's hope the others don't collect any wins
Amy: Hopefully SJG can beat their next opponent to keep them down

Laura: Hopefully we can take 2nd spot but that's looking a bit tricky
Amy: Yes, even SJG isn't safe either
Laura: We have 5 games to play, we aren't out of it as yet
Amy: Although at this point it's not looking terribly good
Laura: The key is beating Godlands, that Greg dude and that Sword dude
Amy: We also need to have big wins over those other two teams

Laura: Say, those Gregoryisgodistan are threatening to execute our people if there's any nudity from us in their country
Amy: Ah yes, them! They love to issue threats
Laura: I guess they could hey
Amy: I think that sort of statement in public is designed for domestic appeasement and well, intimitation of the the opponent
Laura: Well, I'm not going be scared.
Amy: But we shouldn't provoke them either, they are a crazy lot

Laura: Those Godlands people seem just as crazy
Amy: I think the Sword Bloke people are crazier
Laura: They haven't threatened to execute our people though
Amy: We do have enough firepower to turn an average country into dust a few times over, for fun
Laura: Oh yes, we do don't we?
Amy: And that's not counting our secret weapons programs

Laura: We don't respond publicly to threats
Amy: Not normally
Laura: We don't want them to think we're paying attention
Amy: But then they ramp up the rhetoric
Laura: Which makes them look like the aggressor
Amy: Exactly

Laura: So we have three rather PR hungry rivals in our group
Amy: They sure aren't quiet ones
Laura: They sure aren't quiet
Amy: I thought this would happen with such ... unique teams in our group
Laura: How come we attract such teams during the world cup?
Amy: I don't know

Laura: I heard in San Jose Guayabal, they want to end physical money and have total totally digital money system
Amy: Yes, that would be interesting
Laura: Wouldn't work here, the folks here love their cash
Amy: We do have a rather large black market
Laura: In theory it sounds great but I can see huge issues with it
Amy: I can see why the government wants it, it fixes tax avoidance and destroys the black market

Laura: But it would make stealing digital identities, very desirable.
Amy: Oh yes, it would. Use someone else's bank account to pay for your stuff.
Laura: It's bad enough here
Amy: I imagine, there it's gonna be nightmare for people in SJG
Laura: Yes, I've had people out there posing as me. But they were easily found out
Amy: Good luck to the SJG folk if they do approve it

Laura: I guess each to their own
Amy: Jeruselemites are terrible Gold and Silver hoarders, they love their physical money
Laura: It was hard enough to get everyone to accept banknotes
Amy: That's why we still have coins actually
Laura: Try buying stuff in those remote villages with a credit card
Amy: Some of those places don't have power either

Laura: You'll be lucky to find an ATM in some of those places
Amy: I guess out there, this virtual money business isn't on the radar
Laura: Speaking of money, I'm on the new commemorative coin for Naked News Jeruselem
Amy: I saw that, the artist sure likes naked women
Laura: Well, I look pretty good on it
Amy: You would if you're not wearing anything

by **Augusticinia** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 4:42 am

Augusticinia ties Saaksvala

Last time Augusticinia played Saaksvala, Augusticinia won 5-0 at home. Augusticinia in matchday 8 tied Saaksvala. Augusticinia's team morale has been declining as they dropped from 2nd and they are now currently in 4th. Augusticinia played with a very linear game centered around Vladimir Maier. Vladimir Maier had multiple chances to score but failed to put the ball in the net. Augusticinia's Manager Nikolaus Idoni said,"We did well in the beginning but then our momentum began to slow and now our morale is declining. We need to step up our output if we wish to qualify this year."

Augusticinia will play Copper Cuprum in Munich next. Augusticinia is preparing for this home game. Sports Analyst Mohammad Iturburua said,"Augusticinia is not the best in its group but they aren't the worst. They can make it in to the World Cup but it is going to take some luck and some hard effort." The last time Augusticinia played Copper Cuprum they tied 1-1 in Copper Cuprum.

Pictures (AUG-SAK):

Vladimir Maier and James Ljungborg make it past a Saaksvalan Defender

Augusticinian sub Vid Magalhaes fights for the ball.

Vladimir Maier shoots the ball but it goes over the goal.

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 7:02 am

Lord Almighty Gregory's Speech to the People

"Good morning, ladies, gentlemen, and slaves. It is now only 12 days until Creation Day, the glorious and holy day when I, in my infinite wisdom, created the Multiverse 2015 years ago. Of course, Creation Day is the day when no food nor drink is consumed, nor is using the bathroom allowed. Instead, the people of Gregoryisgodistan will spend all 24 hours of the day worshiping and praising me and remembering my Holy Creation, for that is what I have willed. And I am the Lord, and therefore you will do what I will. Of course, Creation Day is a great time to remember your devotion to the One True Lord, to praise me and worship me, and to sing the national anthem every hour on the hour. Songs such as "Awesome is He", "We Love You, Lord" and "Greg is God" are sung, as are readings about my Glorious and Holy Awesomeness and Lordshipness. You will bow to me, you will adore me, and you will bask in my creation.

"And to all those heathens from other countries who say I did not create the Multiverse, who claim the Multiverse is between 6,000 and 14 billion years old, I say you are heathens and must die. But there is an opportunity for repentance. Come to Gregoryisgodistan, attend a Creation Day ceremony, praise me, worship me, accept me as Lord Almighty, then return to your own country and preach to the people about the Awesome Power of the Lord. And convert your people into my Holy Worship, starting Church of Gregoryisgodistan Worship Centers in your country. Then the world will begin to accept me as Creator of the Multiverse, Lord Almighty, God of Everything and the Holy One. Creation Day is the most holy day of the year here in Gregoryisgodistan, and I remind everyone, local and foreigner, to respect that sanctity. Do not eat or drink or you and your family will be executed. Do not go to the bathroom or you and your family will be executed. Simply spend 24 hours praising and worshiping me and hailing my Glorious Creation.

"Soon, the world will know I am God, the world will know I am Lord, and the world will acknowledge my Glorious and Holy Creation of the Multiverse approximately 2,015 years ago. They will adore me, they will praise me, they will bow down to me, and they will worship me as the God I am. Until then, Gregoryisgodistan is and shall remain the Glorious and Holy Nation, the shining gem among heathens, the Greatest Nation on the Multiverse. We will destroy the heathens by the sword and the nuke and the gun until they all accept me as Lord, as God, as Creator. We will start with the demon devils of Saintland, San Jose Guayabal, Associated Godlands, and everyone else on the Enemy List. Those demons will die, those demons will perish, and just wait until the Foot Slaves play the Guaya Beans. We will win, we will avenge our loss on home soil, and we will kill their home fans, destroying the xylocarps of that city, then after we leave, we may very well nuke it. Or I may be bluffing. Do you really want to find out, Guaya Beans? Or would you rather accept me as Lord Almighty God, the Creator of the Multiverse, and be spared? Those are your choices. You have three days. Choose wisely, or you may find yourselves perishing and dying. Or I may be bluffing. But I wasn't bluffing on nuking Hicana like the rest of the Multiverse thought, was I? And then they all died, that country is now a nuclear wasteland. It was our Glorious Moment, along with nuking San Jose Guayabal later in the Great War of Esportiva. And what fun that was too - nuking is our specialty. We may try it some more, or we may be bluffing. You'll just have to wait and see. Or not see, because you'll be dead. Up to you. But you can save yourselves by accepting me as Lord Almighty Gregory, the God of the Multiverse, Creator of the Multiverse, and so on.

"And to Shop Owner, you are not God. Neither is Shirley Phelps-Roper God's sapient mouthpiece. Both of you heathens will die eventually, and soon it will be your turn. But Shop Owner will be spared for helping us in the war against the Guaya Beans. Queen Shirley, you will not be spared. We will storm your country and kill you painfully like we would any other heathen. Then we will nuke the Associated Godlands. And Enemy Crusher Fatty Footy will crush the man who claims to be Jesus Christ. Though I give him credit for spelling his own name right, unlike the Sanctii, who think his name is Eye-ee-zus. But enough about that. It's nukey time! Thank you, and Go Foot Slaves!"

by **Dreamplanet** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 7:13 am

Dreamplanet 1-3 Kernasquillec

A well fought match

"I'm just a bit disappointed..." said João Pedro looking at the stats. "We are 5th out of 6, only 1 win because of RealSquad."
"We might have a chance against Britonisea" said Luis Silva
"Britonisea? Oh god, is it today?!" Said Filipe Vaz shocked
"Yeah, why are you so shocked?" said Aaron Hungar.
"It's just because things could go wrong." "What if we don't score a goal? Or start losing by 6-0 like last time?"
"Well, the stats said we scored every match, we scored 16 goals in total, the most being 6 against RealSquad." Said João Pedro. "I think i fancy our chances against Britonisea, or good old WV friend!"

"Do you think there will be croud trouble?" Said Jorge Cardozo, who was accused of being racist towards a Britonish player, but all cases regarding that was dismissed.
"Nah, i think our relations with Britonisea are quite good, we are quite connected, but still, anything can happen." Said João Pedro.

"But you know, anything can happen."

works? · by **Abanhfleft** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 8:32 am

The Saga of All-Inclusive Haranguer F.C., Part Eight

It was the first day of the 2015-16 season. All throughout Abanhfleft, clubs from all levels of the Fleftic football system were stepping out onto their pitches in preparation for a new campaign that would determine whether they will make glory or drown in ignominy. From the Premier League down to the non-league teams, it was all about the soccer season now.

It was much the same thing in Haranguer, as All-Inclusive Haranguer welcomed Tefel F.C. in their home ground, officially the Haranguer Community Stadium but known as the NBS Stadium after their main sponsor National Book Store. Four of Haranguer's newest signings were all making their Unang Liga debuts in this game: Callisto Parra in goal, Sutalen Desoka to hold down the midfield, and Lasse Torson to feed the ball to Rory Edwards and the other forwards. The team's two new Sams, Gonza and Leroux, will start the game on the bench but could potentially see time as substitutes.

For Tefel, they were fielding a starting eleven that remained unchanged from last season. The team from Eielo Province had signed a few players during the current transfer window, but it appeared as if Tefel saw the players as depth signings, as at least two of the new signings were on the bench for the game. Tefel's main threats were the strike partnership of Oliver Gordon and Ted Strathclyde, who had scored 37 goals between them in the last season, but it wasn't enough to get them back to the Premier League. Haranguer were hoping that the big and physical Desoka would be able to provide a vanguard for their back line against the two Tefel forwards, who were noted for their physicality and startling sudden speed bursts.

But it seemed as if Desoka had lost some of the fire that had given him the nickname "The Copper Beast" as he failed to stand up against an onrushing Strathclyde, who then went past two Haranguer defenders before slotting past Parra to give the visitors the lead at just a quarter of an hour into the game. As the cheers from the 500 traveling fans of the away side cheered their ever-dependable striker, heads were shaking in the home side. This wasn't the start to the season that they had been expecting. Not that there was anything they could compare it to at the moment, but this was the first time that Haranguer had conceded within the first fifteen minutes in the last twenty games.

"Mark your man!" Tom Mereilles shouted from his technical area. "Don't be afraid to tackle! We can do this!"

Invigorated by the conceded goal, Tefel mounted attack after attack on the Haranguer goal, but the home side quickly recovered after their early mistake and locked down, making life just a little bit harder for the away team. As half-time came, the score was still Tefel one, Haranguer nil, but in the last few minutes of the first half it was Haranguer that was now beginning to take control of the game.

No one could really know what Tom told his players in the locker room except those inside, but whatever he said, the players kept up the momentum coming into the second half, and Haranguer came out on fire for the second 45. And they were rewarded within six minutes, as Rory Edwards received the cross from Lasse Torson and headed the ball beyond the Tefel keeper to give Haranguer the equalizer.

With their spirits back up, Haranguer's fans were back behind their team once again, cheering on the home side and giving their players that extra confidence boost. Meanwhile, Tom Mereilles gave the go-ahead for the other new signings to get their debuts as substitutes. Sam Gonza replaced Sutalen Desoka and moved into a more central position, while Samantha Leroux directly replaced Rory Edwards at CAM, but with freedom to play as a false nine. And Haranguer were rewarded once again, as Leroux latched onto Gonza's through-ball, beat off a challenge from a big Tefel defender before sidefooting the ball into the net to give Haranguer the lead.

The match settled a little after that, with both sides making a few probes into their opponents' half, but it seemed as if Leroux's goal had knocked the wind out of Tefel's sails, as the away side sat back and absorbed the pressure from the home side. In the end, Leroux's goal was enough to decide the game, and All-Inclusive Haranguer got their first win and their first three points of the game.

   ABANHFLEFT 2 - 1 CUBONELAND
 POTTER (17')       AMOROSO (58') (og)
BEINEKA (63')

by **Armeia** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 8:57 am

STRIKERLESS: A BLOG FOR ARMEIAN FOOTBALL
ARMEIAN PLAYERS REACT TO SCHRAEDER MOVE

Bianka Schraeder has just entered contract negotiations with historic Redtown side Lionesses, after deciding not to return to AC Kawajiri for a second season. While Lionesses fans are ecstatic to gain such a promising striker, there's controversy back in Kirishima and in parts of Armeia over whether Bianka should have left. "Bianka Schraeder to Lionesses was inevitable, not a question of if, but of when," Sporternav analyst Kane Zorasson commented on the subject. "Carli Cray had her eyes on Schraeder for a long time, and Bianka previously promised Katarina Dana Bonner that she would be at Lionesses by the end of her next contract. This was during the Sporting World Cup, her value has only gone up since then, and LaFlame would have been out of his mind not to complete this deal."

Draga Schraeder has spoken out about the criticism of her sister, along with new Lionesses winger Tess Byquist. Harlequins goaltender Eliska Andres also showed support for Schraeder, who is from the same neighborhood that she's from.

Bianka Schraeder sat down with Tyler Olynik earlier today, to speak about her move to Lionesses.

Tyler: First off, I want to ask you... Have you heard the criticism by Hamasaki Tetsuya?

Bianka: Yes, I have.

Tyler: And what do you have to say about the validity of that criticism?

Bianka: I don't think it's very valid. I'm making the best move for my career right now, and I'm making good on a promise I made to a friend. It was a hard decision to make but I had to take this chance, I promised Katarina that I would.

Tyler: What role did she play in this move?

Bianka: Well, I think it's pretty well known by now that she's depressed, we've been friends for a long time so I wanted to be with her to help her get through that. And she sold me on the idea that we would be building a contender here, that we would also be signing Tess [Byquist] and Aleixis [Villa]. She convinced me that in a year or two, we'll be one of the top teams again, and that I would get more playing time internationally.

Tyler: And did homesickness play a role in you leaving?

Bianka: Yes. I missed Cora City, missed my family and my friends back home. That's one of the reasons why I'm going to Lionesses in specific, Redtown is a lot like Cora City. And I want to be closer to Isa Tangemen when she gets back to Armeia.

Tyler: Was it true that you kept negotiations with Lionesses a secret?

Bianka: It's not like my intention to go to Lionesses eventually wasn't clear. Some people need to read between the lines more.

Tyler: Lastly, do you have a response to the criticism about you from Sayo Matsuoka?

Bianka: *Long pause* Yeah. She can talk all she wants, but at the end of the day she still plays for a poverty club that's the red headed stepchild in their own city. Center City fans started saying that the city was theirs when the Reaches bought them out, but they still have 30,000 empty seats every match. Are they [Expletive] sure? And don't get me started on the derby. When's the last time Center City won a derby? Oh right, it was two years ago, and it took them a handball goal and a [Expletive] penalty shootout to do it. And what about their sleazy owners? Are we all going to ignore how Karl Reach got Pandora drunk so she would sign a contract? And they can't even keep their players, Amy Abramsen would rather become the most hated player in all of [Expletive] Loftus than play for CC. But you're right, Center City. The city is yours.

Tyler: That was quite a... Strong opinion. I imagine the next match against AFCCC is going to be more interesting now?

Bianka: We're going to expose them as a poverty club, so yes. I'm sorry, I don't usually get mad about team stuff, but I can't believe someone who plays there is going to talk about me like that. *sigh* I've always been second to my sister, but that's ending this season.

by **Semarland** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 9:32 am

SEMARLAND V BEARS ARMED: REVIEW
Semars return with a bang after defeating Bears Armed 7-2

Back with a bang? Certainly so. The return of Marc Strand from an injury that prevented him from appearing in the first six qualification games was crucial as the attacking midfielder inspired Semarland to a 7-2 victory over Bears Armed. Andreas Jansen did some changing around, particularly in the midfield. Jansen employed a 4-2-3-1 formation, with Marcel Labonne and Tunji Tunde in holding midfield with Dequane Saint Etienne, Marc Strand and Demba Cisse ahead of them, employing Marc Lygaard as a lone striker. The defence was probably the strongest so far, with Matur Eiriksson, Jakob Lunds, Martell Chalobah and Nathaniel Oseni forming the barrier between Bears Armed’s attack and Marco Valbuena. Yohannas Rasmussen was also brought in as a temporary tactical coach to cover for Johan Nikkelsen who has took temporary paternal leave. Nikkelsen has also expressed interest to return to Eikborg Club, and if Rasmussen can do well in this second half of qualifying and lead Semarland to the World Cup, I think the SFA would be fine with that. Speaking of the SFA, it will be soon that the new Presidential elections will occur. Shortly after the conclusion of the full WCC cycle, the elections will be held and Yemi Adebayo-Jansen is yet to make a statement on whether he will run next term. So far, the only confirmed candidates are Marcel Latibeaudare and Per Johansson. 35 year old Latibeaudare is similarly extravagant to Adebayo-Jansen whereas Johansson, 37, is a more balanced character. There were rumours that Sanders Mykjar, one of Semarland’s most capped players, would be in the running, but Mykjar is yet to confirm this.

On to the game, let me show my admiration for Nathaniel Oseni. Johan Huxley is smooth, composed, the sort of stuff maybe you’d look for in a central midfielder. Think Tunji Tunde. Huxley is okay attacking wise, still developing but I think Oseni has the perfect balance of both. He plays like a lion. He’s fast, stocky, can take a challenge. He takes no prisoners and will stop at nothing just to get into the final third. Huxley is probably a better crosser than Oseni though, but both are set to work on their flaws in training, of course. Oseni’s good defensively, never shying away from a tackle and his free kick game has been impressive. Usually, it’s Marcel Labonne to take these set pieces but we’ve seen Oseni take a few in the last couple of matches and he almost ripped the net in the friendly against San Jose Guayabal that took Henry Hernandez an impressive save to deny. However, I do prefer Labonne in these instances as he seems a lot more assured, unlike Oseni who will just charge at the ball and thwack it, miraculously 97% of these attempts are on target. Anyway, I really liked the Labonne/Tunde partnership in defensive midfield. It will allow Jansen to utilise both of them, the wingers and Strand or Cisse (the latter is also capable on the wing) but use only one striker, unless three centre-backs are used (Lunds, Chalobah, Pedersen) but in turn, that will result in Eiriksson and Oseni/Huxley getting left out. It’s true every formation will have its own flaws and strengths, but I think the lone striker will especially work well with Lygaard, Lindesfarne and Simeone. When Nketiah and Mavididi are played though, the formation should allow two strikers as these two play at their best when they work together. That doesn’t mean they’re useless on their own, but in games like this you want the best synergy possible, correct?

Anyway, Strand. His impact was incredible. He formed a nice little triangle with Labonne and Tunde behind him and linked up well with Saint Etienne, Cisse and Lygaard. His involvement in the first goal was insane. Picking up the ball in the middle of Semarland’s half, he glided past two of Bears Armed’s midfielders before sweetly passing it to the right hand side, setting Cisse going down the flanks. Cisse cut inside, knocked it back to Strand who instead of shooting (which is what he looked like he was going to do), he dummied, chipped it forward to Lygaard who controlled it beautifully before placing it past Bears Armed’s goalkeeper on the 17 minute mark. Stunningly beautiful play. Then as Semarland doubled their lead on 30 minutes, Strand played it to Saint Etienne whose cross found the head of Lygaard who got his second. Bears Armed could pull one back on 35 minutes after a slip from Eiriksson and not even Valbuena could save the rocket of a shot from their forward, but just before half time Saint Etienne struck after bamboozling their right-back with a neat little stepover then curling it home past the goalkeeper to make it 3-1. Saint Etienne is turning out to be a real gem of a player, and with clubs across Semarland fighting to take the final year of his scholarship in the 2019/20 season, it surely watered even more mouths of academy directors across the country. There has been rumoured interest in him from other nations too, and upon the conclusion of this World Cup, he is one player I can definitely see moving.

The second half started as brightly as the first, with Demba Cisse hammering home the fourth on 50 minutes. Jakob Lindesfarne, Diego Snow and Abel Nkutu all came on as a triple substitution on 57 minutes, replacing Lygaard, Cisse and Saint Etienne resepectively (funnily enough, all the goalscorers) to see how they would fit in with this formation. Turns out they’d fit in well. Diego Snow’s low cutback found Marc Strand on 63 minutes who got his first goal of the campaign, and Strand repaid the favour four minutes later chipping it over the heads of two Bears Armed defenders for Snow to cushion and neatly volley home. Bears Armed pulled one back on 72, after winning a free kick on the edge of the box due to a foul from Oseni, making it 6-2, but Jakob Lindesfarne would shut them up for good after heading home from Abel Nkutu’s corner on 80 minutes. And that would be the end of this incessant splurge of goals (probably one of the highest in Semarland’s history), and it took Semarland back up to their deserved second place. With five more games to go, five wins should seal second place for us, but realistically we’re looking at four with Polar Islandstates up next. However, if we beat the Terns and results go slightly downhill for them after that, there is actually an okay chance we could top the group with our Valhallan friends going to the playoffs. But again, realistically second place is what we should look for.

Moving on, if you were scratching your heads when I mentioned clubs in Semarland were fighting to take on Dequane Saint Etienne for the final year of his scholarship, this comes after a new SYFA rule implemented by SYFA President Kwame den Lind last week. Coverage on that has been relatively low-key but with Saint Etienne’s performances it has seemed to have blown up. Usually Semar clubs are restricted to taking on only seven or eight, but for category A* and A-rated academies, they have been given permission to take on a few more. A* academies (FC Jansberg, Krsthaven, FC Nuholm, Eikborg Club and FC Kolberg) can now take on a maximum of 12 scholars from 2019 onwards, and A-rated academies can take on 10 (All other clubs that would be in the Premarligaen in 2019/20). For A-rated academies it is only a couple more, but for the bigger clubs, who of course have wider talent pools, it is a welcome thing for them. However, they will have to comply by SYFA’s rotation rules. Players are now expected to get slightly more game time and failure for each registered scholar to do so (unless they got the same amount plus 20% for the U21s or injuries) they will be subject to fines to the player(s) in question and the SYFA. Five offences in one season will see the club’s category demoted. If a second-year scholar becomes a victim of this, they will be offered an extension. They won’t be able to play for the U18s (unless they are a goalkeeper), but will have to play a set amount of time for the U21s. If they decide not to, they will automatically be entered into the Semarluundik Natunol Akademik. Signing foreign players will also be a lot stricter and clubs may have no more than two foreign players in each age group. If there are more than two in an age group but have been signed before this rule was implemented, they will not be subject to this rule.

It’ll be interesting to see the A* and A rated clubs revert their decisions of releasing a few U16 players (as this has not been set in stone) but usually, most clubs only let a couple go anyway, seeing as U16 groups are usually small and those released at the end of their U14 contract are automatically entered into the SNA if no other club signs them. The decisions for the 2019/20 scholarships are of course, not set in stone and so clubs will have the luxury of taking all of their players in. The limit of players in an age group pre-scholarship was 11 anyway, and most of these were at nine in case of any foreign signings, but if a couple of clubs have to let a couple go despite the increased scholars rule, the A* rated academies will happily take them on, no doubt. All in all, the future of Semar football is looking bright.

by **Dreamplanet** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 9:35 am

DTV.com World Cup Qualifiers: Reviews

Britonisea vs Dreamplanet

Doportedas Olympic Stadium, Britonisea

The History
Dreamplanet and Britonisea are countries which are both Football driven, but both keep a close eye for WorldVision, Britonisea and Dreamplanet first encountered in WorldVision 38, which was Britonisea's returning year, after leaving in WorldVision 36 (Dreamplanet debuted in 37) Dreamplanet and Britonisea do have a strong friendship specially in points, Dreamplanet has awarded Britonisea the most 12 than it has given to any other country. Britonisea won in home soil, but the intro was known for the Dreamplanetian appearance.

This showed great sense of sportsmanship. The crowd was very fond of Dreamplanet, just like Esta Lloviendo and now Bloodbath. The connection between Dreamplanet's votes and Britonish votes make it straight that whatever Dreamplanet produces, Britonisea likes and visa versa, however will this be the case for this edition?

After the draw both countries were curious of what could happen after both countries were drawn on the same group, group 2.

The First Game
Dreamplanet were coming off a 2-4 loss against Kernasquillec, which showed that the Dreamplanetian side was not at it's finest, but hopes were high, as Britonisea weren't as highly ranked as Kernasquillec, but then everything went wrong as in the first half Britonisea were 6-0 up, which made the Dreamplanet supporters leave the stadium enraged, which gave the match a different meaning than the "Friendship Match" that we knew before that.

Dreamplanet later scored 2, as the Britonish side clearly thought the match was pretty much over. The Dreamplanetian manager, Rodrigo Vaz was fired because of that match after losing so badly. The Dreamplanetian side did not go to the press conference and the Britonish side recall hearing the shouts of the dressing rooms at half time.

Recent results and Rising Tensions
Dreamplanet had to wait untill they faced RealSquad to lose 6-4. But things weren't easy. Dreamplanet was losing 3-4 at one point.
After that match the Dreamplanetian side became more agressive, specially Jorge Cardozo, who was accused for racism in the Dreamplanet vs Britonisea match, Jorge Cardozo denied any wrong doing and later all cases were dismissed.
During the Garifunya match Dreamplanet were leading 2-1 to lose 2-3.

Britonisea picked up another win and 2 draws, they are 5th next to Dreamplanet, who is 6th out of 7.

Jorge Cardozo is the most red carded player, standing with 2 red cards, and he returned at the Garifunya match after a 1 match ban.

Britonisea also had a bad experience, before their previous match they had a riot in Eaux because a stadium could not host matches.
Britonisea also concern that the match could be very heated.

Hype
The match was hyped as early as when the result came out, on the Britonish review of the match, this was said:

Concerning the Britonish Crowd, I do think that there will be a bit of friction in the stadium when they come over to Britonisea. I just wish this doesn't effect WV Relationships because they are a different type of crowd!

The new Dreamplanetian manager, João Pedro, said himself after the match against Kernasquillec after being asked about the fans of both countries:

I'm not sure how they will be, it's almost a derby on it's own, i think the name of "Friendship Match" has been completely obliterated by the hype surrounding this match.

Most Dreamplanetians know Britonisea for WorldVision voting relations, but most Dreamplanetians are picking sides on the derby, but most fans are still united because of WorldVision, with WorldVIsion 43 coming up, we can only wonder how bitter things might be if things kick off in the match, WorldVision 43 could be really akward for Britonisea and Dreamplanet, but who knows?

Update (24/10/2001 16:09)
But just recently we had news that there were fights outside the stadium between 7 supporters, they have been arrested.

About the teams

Britonisea:
Britonisea are 5 points ahead of Dreamplanet, if Dreamplanet win there wouldn't be much changes in the rankings, their form is:
2 wins, 2 draws, 3 losses

Dreamplanet:
Dreamplanet are far away from Britonisea to not be eliminated, their form is:
1 win, 0 draws, 7 losses
It was not a good start for Dreamplanet's first international competition

Visiting Britonisea
The match for today is in Doportedas, Britonisea, this will be the last match the stadium holds, first holding the match which they drew, against The Sarian. The Britonish and Dreamplanetian crowds expect, but they are both passionate fans just as any fan would be. But there are worries about conflicts and riots, which could potentially spoil the game, but this was to be expected, there is going to be rising tensions after the way Britonisea fell from 1st to 5th which really doesn't help them qualify, but Dreamplanet's hopes are pretty much down the gutter after losing 1-3 to Kernasquillec, as of before the Britonisea vs Dreamplanet match, Dreamplanet have scored atleast 1 goal every match they've played. But they've also never had a clean sheet, and they have the most goals scored in a match (atleast in group 2) with 11 goals in 1 game (Dreamplanet 6-4 RealSquad)

by **Valanora** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 9:40 am

"I really hate those teams that refuse to play such defensive and irritating styles. Yeah, it might get the job done but it's an absolute chore to watch and really just makes the game a slogfest when it is supposed to be beautiful and intricate. Instead you get these nasty tackles and consistent fouling that just mucks the game to no end and makes it really just a miserable experience for both player as well as spectator. However I guess teams like Taeshan and Ko-oren don't care as long as they get the occasional result and frustrate the opposition."

"Truly, only the likes of Rejistania and Yafor 2 could really enjoy such frustrating and mindless tactics that these sort of squads employ to turn the game into that ugly display of sport, cause you really can not even begin to call it football. It is more like gridiron the way they go in with the fouls and tackles, getting physical and stalling in their tactics. I swear there had to be at least a good five minutes of time wasting just in the second half by the Taeshan squad but was there five minutes of added time? Nope, just three, which is an outright shame considering it's supposed to make up for all delays and stoppages, which those tactics really are."

"Well at least we've gotten both of the games against them behind us now with four points, while not ideal, certainly is better than some of the other scenarios that could have occurred when you consider the history of scoreless draws that the Knights have. If we continue to beat the teams that we're supposed to, then everything will end up fine and the match against Cosumar a mere formality than anything that actually matters. Considering the squad's lack of performing in the clutch as of late, I rather have that scenario than having to get a result against them on the last matchday for us and then having to watch them on the actual last matchday of the qualifiers."

"Well we still have The Fallenmark Islands to travel to after Hodife comes to Capri for our next match. I know that we beat both of those squads handedly in the first half but both of them are good teams, especially The Fallenmark Islands considering it will be an away leg. The fall weather in the northern part of Rushmore is not exactly known as being the same sort of temperate and enjoyable weather as it is in our nation during the fall. I fully expect snow and around freezing conditions, which is bound to be a factor considering most of our squad plays in temperate climates and are not used to snow and those near freezing temperatures."

"I don't know, the side was able to navigate through Quebec during their winter season and still put in some rather good performances and a few of the players do play in leagues without a winter break or in the bad climates. While it will definitely be a tricky trip, perhaps even the most difficult of trips in the second half now that Taeshan is behind us, we still should come away with a result. That however is getting too far ahead as Hodife does have some history in the tournament and are up next, so we definitely should not be looking past them."

"No, you're right, Hodife have the talent to pull an upset and now that we did drop points, we can't afford to let up or another another game where we drop points. Our perfect first half will be for naught if we find ourselves in the midst of a spiraling collapse in the second half. The squad will need to settle down and focus on the game ahead of them, not worry about what is ahead or what just occured. Focus on the task at hand and see the result through."

"Visualize the win you say?"

"Not exactly, though some positive thinking like that certainly would not go amiss among a squad like ours."

by **Britonisea** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 11:44 am

Disgusting

Act 4; Scene 1

The stage is clear. The boys left the stage. A group of school boys, wearing Sarian football clothing comes on stage. Then a group of Britonish school children, wearing the Britonish kit comes on to the stage. Sebastian happens to be one of the boys for the Britonish team. A referee, Timothy, comes in to the centre of the stage and places the ball. Sebastian puts his foot on the ball and strikes a position to score. The Sarian team look at Sebastian with evil eyes, knowing their move to mess him up. Timothy blows his whistle and the next song starts, "Song 4- Kick the Ball". A fight breaks on stage between Sebastian and a few of the children of the opposition. Timothy tries to intervene but is thrown up in the air. Whilst in the air, he starts singing the song.

Timothy: (Sings)
WHAT HAS THIS WORLD COME TO?
I THOUGHT FOOTBALL BROUGHT US TOGETHER?
LOOK AT THE HAPPENINGS AROUND THE WORLD.
WHY IS THERE SO MUCH FIGHTING?
Sebastian:(Sings)
GET OFF MY HAIR. THAT IS A FOUL!
I REALLY NEED MY JUSTICE NOW!
HEY REFEREE, GIVE HIM THE RED.
GET OFF THIS STAGE, BEFORE I KNOCK YOU FOR DEAD.
The Sarian Boys: (Sings)
GO AWAY, WE ARE NOT SCARED.
WE WILL BEAT YOUR STUPID NATION WELL.
LOOK AT THE TIME, 89:00.
THE SCORES 3-2, WE WON, BYE YOU.
The Britonish Boys: (Sings)
GET OFF THE PITCH OR KICK THE BALL
RESPECT US HERE OR KICK THE BALL
PASS THE BALL OR KICK THE BALL
KICK THE BALL, WE STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Timothy and Sebastian: (Sings)
KICK THE BALL, KICK THE BALL, KICK THE BALL!
THEY'RE USING THEIR TACTICS TO MANIPULATE US.
COME ON BRITONISEA, TIMES'A'TICKIN.
Timothy: (Shouts)
5
Sebastian:
KICK THE BALL
Timothy:
4
Sebastian:
KICK THE BALL
TImothy: (Shouts)
3, ah Seb
Sebastian:
NO MORE TIME!
Timothy: (Shouts)
2, eek.
Sebastian:
Noooo!
Timothy: (Shouts)
1

Timothy blows the whistle as The Britonish Team drops to the floor and looks on at the Sarian Boys who pick up the trophy and run off the stage, making fun of the Britonish Team.

Sebastian: We lost 3-2 to Sarian. So close, but not close enough. *Cries in Timothy's shoulder* What do we do know?
Timothy: There is no time to cry about it, we have a long trip to Doportedas tomorrow, remember. We have to watch the Dreamplanet match! It is expected to be the match of the group!
Sebastian: How long will it take us to get to Doportedas?
Timothy: By train, 3 hours. Hurry up, I'll meet you at Luton Station in four hours, bring some clothes for an overnight stay.
Sebastian: Okay, cool *Getting up*
Timothy: And no girls.
Sebastian: I promise.

Sebastian leaves the stage while Timothy stays on the stage. He sits down on the floor. He then looks to his left and picks up a suitcase which is on the other side of the room. There are a stack of clothes quite nearby too. He picks those up too.

Timothy: Oh my Gosh. I am going to Doportedas; finally! Can you going to the hustle and bustle of the city, our capital city...The city with 18 million people in it? That's like...4 times more than Luton's population. *Zips suitcase* I don't mind going to the Doportedas Stadium, or the Olympic Stadium as they call it. Watching the Dreamplanet match. I mean, what could possible go wrong? Literally? At least Britonisea has 0% of qualifying for the next round. *Chuckles* Maybe, this means that Sebastian can stop banging on about football. Let's speak more about, I don't know...The Olympics! It's being held in Electrum and Vers-Gelderland, I haven't heard of them. But Electrum! Like, WorldVision Electrum? Am I dreaming? This is so cool! I am going to Electrum for my holidays, it's going to be amazing...I wish Sebastian was interesting in the Olympics, and not the football in the olympics. It's a shame.

Timothy then takes his suitcase out of the main part of the stage and stands "outside" where Sebastian comes running to him with a massive bag. He was wearing the Britonish Kit. He smiles at Timothy but they don't speak to each other. The "cab" comes and they are taken to the station.

Scene 4; Scene 2

They are set in a hotel room, adjacent to the stadium where the next match is set to take place. The laid on the floor and put their suitcase as their pillow.

Sebastian: We are in Doportedas. It is so different. I liked crossing the waters to get to this little island.
Timothy: I know right. We are here for tonight, tomorrow, and we leave the next day. So instead of the match, which is at 1:30pm, where do you want to go?
Sebastian: We could go to...the centre.
Timothy: Really? *In glee*
Sebastian: Yeah, that's were you wanted to go right? And then we can go watch the match, and then after, we can go to the beach. Amsterdam Beach sounds like a nice beach and you can only take one bus to get there.
Timothy: True, okay let's do that then. Ah, Sebastian?
Sebastian: Yes, Timothy?
Timothy: I am actually looking forward to the Dreamplanet match, I think that this match is going to go very well.
Sebastian: We just need to win something.
Timothy: Goodnight?
Sebastian: Goodnight.

Exeunt

by **Schottia** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 12:08 pm

Their Lives

Tea for Two.

#21: G. Corsie, Central Midfielder

'Are you sure I can't get you a cup of tea?' Said Gary hovering around the removal-man like an irritating insect. He always fell apart when dealing with tradesmen or the working class. It seemed to tap into some suppressed, and deep-rooted insecurity, and he ceased to function normally.

'No Pal, honestly, ye'r alright.' Said the burly and unshaven man who was applying layers of industrial strength bubble wrap to Gary's office chair with an impressive speed and deftness. Gary's living room was barely visible under the mass of cardboard boxes and packaged furniture, as he got ready for his big move. Looking around it was possible to make out tables, lamps, desks, and armchairs, all intricately wrapped-up.

'Cup of coffee then?' The man had only been here for just over an hour, and already this was fifth time Gary had tried to get a hot drink down his neck. He didn't really know what else to do other than offer hot caffeinated beverages. Perhaps it was coming from a working class background himself, that made him desperate to fit back into a world he had formerly vacated off his own accord. What would his father, a fishmonger for forty-years, say now if he could see his snivelling brat of a son.

The removal-man hadn't recognised him, or if he had, he hid it very well. Gary was very used to that moment's pause when people first clocked eyes on him. The old: Is... that... Gary... Corsie... sort of look, but he hadn't detected that here. That was fine, it was nice to get to know people on a level playing field without having to answer a tirade of questions, or being forced to describe what countless players were like in person.

'Nah, it's cool. I dinae drink that much tea or coffee these days.' The man said in his visceral accent. Gary frowned, Plan-A had failed and he was no closer to striking up a dialogue with the mover. The man was probably early forties, but he looked much older, possibly on account of having a proper job. He seemed pretty content just to get on with his work, not that Gary was going to leave him alone for a split second. He most likely couldn't offer him another tea or coffee, not now. Maybe another hot drink would go down better, Gary had some Horlicks in the cupboard, which hadn't yet been packed? Or maybe some warm milk, honey, and turmeric powder? No! Those weren't working class drinks; you don't win over people like this with that sort of crap. Was there a working class herbal tea? Maybe Peppermint? Fennel? Liquorish? No, he didn't look like a liquorish man. Or if he did, it would be in sweetie form rather than a drink. He could offer him some chocolate...

'I have some chocolate in the kitchen if you would like a bit?' Asked Gary ever hopeful. 'Milk chocolate? Or dark-80% with cocoa solids?'

The man stood up and straightened his back, having just finished preparing the office chair. 'Nah pal, I'm no' hungry. I appreciate it, but I'd just rather get on with this.'

'No no no...' Gary waved away his apologies. 'I understand your position entirely... mate.' Mate? When had Gary ever called anyone mate? 'I'll let you get on.'

'So what's next anyway.' He said rubbing his hands together, while Gary began scuttling around looking for the next item of furniture, desperate not to keep the man waiting. Finally Gary rolled in another office chair from his bedroom and parked it in front of him.

'Another office chair?' The man exclaimed. 'Is that four? Why do ye have so many?'

There was a very good reason why Gary had four office chairs. It was the same reason he had four desks. He had one station for doing his writing, one for painting his miniatures, one for drawing, and one for doing any small administration tasks which might arise. Was this a bit pedantic? Well possibly, but three years of more or less living alone had meant that Gary had been able to tailor the house exactly to his needs. Moving in with Chloe was certainly going to present its own problems. For a man who had seen every one of his relationships crumble to dust before his lazy and disinterested eyes, moving half way across the world to set up home with someone was a risky business.

'So where is it all this stuff is going anyway?' The man said after Gary could only really shrug in response to his last question.

'Eh, Nephara.' He answered finally

'In Esportiva?' The man asked making sure his geography was accurate. 'Great football team, I watch the Nepharim Premiership on the tele.' The man nodded, thinking to himself. 'I've not watched Schottic football in a long time, it's a heap of rubbish. In fact I stopped watching it years and years ago. I made a pact with myself not to waste my time on it, and I've stuck by it.'

'Oh yeah - eh, rubbish - mhm - no good.' Gary nodded along making short affirmative noises of agreement. At least this explained why the man didn't recognise him -- one mystery solved.

'So have you already got somewhere to move into?' The man was talking to him! No need to offer any more cups of tea. He was having a normal conversation with a working class person! Wouldn't his parents be proud?

'Ah, um... yes.' Careful Gary, don't blow it. 'I'm moving in with my partner actually.' He added, trying to sound relaxed.

'Aaah. You've got a bird?' The man asked with a tone in his voice that Gary didn't much like.

'A partner.' He corrected the man, parrots were birds, and women were certainly not. Wait, why did the man sound surprised? Did he think that Gary was some hopeless case? Bebearded-middleclass-wargamers sometimes found romance too. He felt like adding something to the effect of: "And she is actually attractive" but he couldn't think how to say it without sounding like a misogamist so he just left it.

'And what does your partner do out in Nephara?' The man asked.

But wait!

What was with the emphasis on partner? No! this was terrible, the man didn't believe him. He though Gary was lying. He actually thought so little of him, that he would lower himself to making up an imaginary girlfriend. This was probably why he wouldn't accept a cup of tea, he had no respect for Gary. What did he answer now? Maybe he should have told him earlier that he was a Schottic internationalist, and signed for a club in Nephara? But it was too late, it would just be weird to bring it up now. He couldn't tell the man that Chloe was a professional footballer, he would never believe that! He might as well say she was an astronaut, or someone who juggled chainsaws on a unicycle. He would actually need to lie to convince the man that he wasn't lying. Oh god the irony.

'Eh... She's a...' Don't heisted! 'She's a p-p-p-police officer.'

'A police officer?' The man was trying not to smile as he threw another layer of bubble wrap round the chair, taping it into place. 'And how did you guys meet?'

He'd made it worse! The man now definitely didn't believe him. This scene should be recorded and shown to anyone who was considering telling a lie. How was he going to get himself out of this one? Well saying something that sounded believable without hesitating would be a good start.

'At a police station...' Gary answered realising that he needed to add more. 'I had had my car radio stolen, and... Eh... she was the officer that dealt with my case.' The man was still looking at him. 'We eh... arranged to meet up and... well yeah, the rest is history as they say.'

He really wasn't buying it, Gary was stuck between a rock and a hard place here. It had gone too far now, he couldn't backtrack at tell the man the truth, he just had to keep digging deeper and hope that he came out of the other side.

'So what's her name?' The removal-man could sense that he was on the ropes already, and he was going in for the sucker punch. Gary had no doubt that this incident would feature in some hilarious anecdote when the man retold it to his friends at the bar tonight.

"Haha, I was round at this big-posh-beardy guy's house today..."

"...spent the whole day offering me cups of tea..."

"...pretended to have a girlfriend."

'Chloe -' God-damn-it! He couldn't say Rudden. 'Stin...at...ion...man.'

'Stinationman.' Said the man fit to burst. 'Where does that name originate from?'

Another lie? In for a penny in for a pound? Or he could just tell the truth? Tell him that he was actually a footballer too, and had just signed for Chatswood? Maybe this would ingratiate him into the man's good graces. But no! He would just think it was another lie on top of all the others. He would wonder why Gary hadn't mentioned it earlier when it was brought up. And he would also have to explain why he had made up the police officer thing.

Gary was puce with embarrassment. 'It's a local... name.'

'A local name?'

'Oh yes... definitely.' Maybe if Gary wished hard enough the floor would give way and he would plummet out of the conversation. 'It's quite common I assure you.'

'Oh really? It's just that I've never heard of it.' The man smirked.

'Oh well.' Gary shrugged. 'You've learned something new today.' He added with a nervous laugh.

'I certainly have...' Said the man happy with his work. What kind of a sadist enjoyed torturing people like this? 'So what's next anyway?' He asked and Gary had never been more grateful in his life for a change of subject. 'Please tell me it's not another bloomin' office chair!'

'Nope! No more office chairs, haha!' Replied Gary overcompensating a little. 'Lets do the bed next? Is it best if we take it apart before packing it up?'

'Well...' the man looked dumbfounded. '...yes. Otherwise it might be a bit difficult to get it down the stairs...'

Gary had to admit that was pretty obvious, but compared to the earlier discomfort this was relatively mild. He must have looked like such a clueless posh-kid to this man. 'Good point...' Said Gary trying to save face.

The man sighed an exasperated sigh at Gary's naivety. 'I'll go and get my tools from the hallway.'

Gary nipped into his room while the man fetched his drill. He could at least take the mattress off the bed, and make it look like he could actually do something himself.

... ... ...

'Ah.' One syllable, one sound, perhaps even only one letter; it was all he could say as he noticed one important fact he had overlooked. The headboard of his bed was dotted with pictures of Chloe, which he had taken on their recent holiday. What was worse though was the large poster of her in her North Laithland strip that she had stuck on the wall as a joke just before she'd flown out last week. All that was missing was a candle burning in front of her a pile of her nail-clippings, and some stolen strands of hair.

'Okay got it! Shall we...' The removal-man froze just behind Gary taking in the sight in front of them, obviously recognising the young woman instantly. 'Why have you...? Actually don't answer that.'

Well was there any point in Gary trying to explain away why is room looked like a shrine to the Schottic left-winger? Of course there wasn't, he wouldn't believe anything now. How could it be that the truth was now the least plausible explanation. This was going to be one of those stories wasn't it? When people inevitably asked the removal-man what the weirdest thing he'd ever seen in a client’s house was.

There was only one thing left for Gary to say.

'Are you sure I can't get you a tea or a coffee?'

by **Associated Godlands** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 12:41 pm

GodHatesYou.God
The official blog of Shirley Phelps-Roper

Ugh. 2-2 against Aeqamustopia. I mean, I don't even know what to say. Aeqamustopia isn't Gregoryisgodistan, or The Sword Bloke, or Jeruselem. They aren't some sort of special uber-heathen that must die in the most painful way possible. They're mediocre. They're the kind of nation where God says the word and they, their heathen citizens, their heathen flag, everything is sent into Hell. There is absolutely no reason for god to stall our World Cup qualifying in order to use some master plan against this nation.

Which is why I am certain at this point that my suspicions of there being a Muslim on this team are correct. God is definitely sending a sign, saying that we have a Muslim within our group. Disturbing news, I know. But we can't afford to be in denial about this any longer. Dick Cheney and his committee will be working hard to find this person, and they will be granted full access to the national team. I will assist them in their efforts in any way possible, because I'll be damned if they don't find anything. Well, I won't be damned. If they don't find anything, they'll probably be damned to Hell for conspiring with the Muslim to cover up his actions.

As for the game against Aeqamaustopia, it was awful. Our only bright spot was the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, who scored both of our goals. He also was excellent defensively, something I cannot say about our defense. They gave up many chances, only for the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ to come in and save the day with a timely tackle. Judas Iscariot in particulat was very bad, and his own goal was completely inexcusable. I wish I had enough trust in my backups to replace him.

Next up is Natanians in Nosts. If we don't get the win against them I'm taking some major actions. Until then, long live Associated Godlands! Shirley Phelps-Roper out.

by **The Saint James Islands** » Sat Oct 24, 2015 2:13 pm

Le Royal du Philibiscostal - Proudly serving the heart of Omerica

EDITORIAL: Electoral reform is a must for Omerica to be a true democracy
The surprise issue of the campaign is not something to be shunned, but rather embraced

If you had asked the Royal to name the issue it thought would be most critical to the 2021 campaign, electoral reform would not have been the first thing to come to mind. But ever since the Liberals proclaimed that they would pursue electoral reform if elected has turned what was once a referendum on Socialist stewardship of the Omerican economy into a referendum on Omerica’s way of electing its parliament.

Philibiscostal is divided into more electorates than any other canton at 43. They are Amberhill Courthouse, Amberhill Harbours, Barking, Barry and Porthcawl, Birmingham, Bolton, Bristol Point, Bristol West, Carcassone, Carpentia Beaches, Carpentia-on-the Leslie, Charlottetown, Chelsea, Chesterhill Flats, Chesterhill Temple, Cooperville, Dudley, Glamorgan, Gower and Neath, Hackney Limehouse, Hackney Steps, Harrington, Hensley Carlisle, Hensley Parks, Kipping, La Rochelle, Mecklenburg, Merton, Mirande and Mirepoix, Montpellier, Narbonne, Newport, Point Rouge, Reading, Rochefort, Rutland, Sevenoaks, Seville, Sinton Heights, Stanley, Swansea, Trim and Talbot, and Waterloo. Each of the 43 electorates chooses one MP to send to Commonwealth House in Georgetown by plurality vote, i.e. the candidate with the most votes wins.

There are a couple of problems with this system, though. First is the method by which MPs are allocated to each canton. The Basic Law, the foundation of Omerica’s constitution, sets out the rules for allocating MPs in Articles 22 through 25. Article 22 simply states that the allocation of MPs among cantons should be based on population. Article 23, which limits the size of the House of Representatives to three times the size of the House of Councillors, seems irrelevant, but it is problematic. Article 24, which deals with cantons that deny people the vote based on race or sex, is irrelevant, since the Supreme Court ruled that a canton could not do such things, so we don’t need to worry about what it says. And Article 25 dealt with the initial allocation of seats until the first federal census could be conducted, but also included the mandatory minimum provision: no canton can have fewer MPs than councillors.

Three times the size of the House of Councillors (96) is 288, which just so happens to be the number of MPs we currently have. Those 288 seats are then allotted to each canton on the basis of population using the D’Hondt method. When looking into how the D’Hondt method works, it sounds as if this is a satisfactory system, but alas, it leaves five cantons with fewer MPs than councillors: Melenchon, North Provence and Braadwund are one short of their four MP minimum, Asterleis is two short and Vestleis is three seats short of the minimum of four. Vestleis would ideally be represented by just a single MP for the entire canton, but instead gets to elect four from the electorates of Dancrest, Elsen, Emmelo and Lasmer.

Inevitably, if some cantons receive more seats than they should, others must receive less. Nice, Kalsden, South Selaga, Chamangol, Victoria, Georgetown, Durham and—rather predictably—Philibiscostal are all shortchanged a seat they would otherwise have if the silly four MP minimum did not exist. If Elections Omerica drew electorates so that every 64,504 people—the number of people an MP in Vestleis represents—was represented by one MP, Philibiscostal would elect 90 and the House would more than double in size to 605, which is more than twice the capacity of the House of Representatives chamber in Commonwealth House.

This problem is caused entirely by the interaction of the “nexus” in Article 23 and the “councillors rule” in Article 25, so Omerica needs to amend the Basic Law in some way if this problem of malapportionment—where an MP from Nice or Mid-Provence has to represent more than twice as many people as an MP from Vestleis or Asterleis—is to be rectified. One option is to get rid of the minimum number of MPs, thereby reducing the five overrepresented cantons to their proper entitlement of less than four and allowing the eight underrepresented cantons elect the extra MP they ought to have. The other solution is to eliminate the nexus so that the lower house can be more than three times the size of the upper house, allowing us to add extra MPs to get the five smallest cantons to the minimum of four. It is not ideal due to the amount of malapportionment it still produces, but it is better than what we are doing now.

As for the plurality vote or “first-past-the-post” system, it is riddled with problems that render the system akin to Swiss cheese. Any Omerican old enough to have lived under the Aaron Miller government might remember the election in which he attempted to manipulate the electorate boundaries so as to marginalise the opposition Nationals and Socialists. This luckily backfired immensely, but should not have really been possible in the first place. Combined with the likelihood that MPs are elected by a minority of voters and the system’s severe bias towards the largest parties, it is little wonder that the Liberals, who were at one point trying to take advantage of the very flaws they are now deriding, are calling for a change in the system while the Nationals are fighting it tooth-and-nail.

The Liberals are on track to win approximately 46.5% of the seats on 34.1% of the vote according to the latest Royal of Philibiscostal projection. The Socialists will win around 37.5% of the seats on 27.9% of the vote, while, strangely enough, the Nationals’ 16.8% of the vote will translate to just about 6.3% of the seats. It is not hard to see why Omericans feel they have no meaningful voice in Georgetown if this shameful kind of disparity between votes and seats exists.

The elections over the last two decades should also demonstrate why exactly the plurality system needs to go. From 1998 to 2013, the Socialists sucked enough support from the Liberals that National governments were winning commanding majorities with ridiculously small proportions of the vote. Likewise, since 2013, the Liberals have been the biggest threat to the Nationals, practically guaranteeing Socialist governments due to splits in the opposition. A party endorsed by a minority of voters should not be able to win a majority of seats and it is shameful that we have kept going with a terrible system that allows this for so long.

Luckily, we do not need to amend our constitution to fix this. A simple Act of Parliament will do thanks to Article 26, which allows Parliament “to set out the method of electing the [House of Representatives]”. As long as the Nationals and Confederation, both of whom oppose reform, do not have a majority between them, reform might happen. It might depend on the mood of the Socialists, who have wavered over the issue, but is certainly easier than trying to win a constitutional referendum, which needs a majority of voters nationwide and a majority of voters in a majority of cantons to agree to reform for reform to be accomplished.

We have to be cautious, though, because not all alternatives will fix the problem of a minority of voters controlling the government for themselves. The alternative vote, a widely proffered alternative, does not fix this problem. Nor does the House of Councillors system—single non-transferable vote, where voters choose one candidate and the several candidates with the most votes win—solve the problem either. This is why the Royal is reluctant to fully support the Liberals, as there is no guarantee of fixing the real problems that our electoral system faces under their watch. But the Liberals are the best hope for change, which we need if we want to be an actual democracy instead of the “dictatorship-lite” that we currently are.

Turanga ʻAhipula ʻo ʻOmerika
6 Jacques la Rouge Road
Port-Alexandre, Philibiscostal 18-A40
COMMONWEALTH OF OMERICA
Official Press Release - Tuku Katipa Hoi ʻe Pieti

Qualifiers for the Seventy-Third World Cup
Omerica national team line-up vs UK Zackalantis (home)
Substitutes
GK - N^o 1: INTAN Petera
GK - N^o 13: Stéphane ROUSSEAU
LD - N^o 14: Martin PALL
CD - N^o 17: Jean-Marie MOLINEAUX
CD - N^o 15: Makara ʻO TOA
RD - N^o 16: Mikäel CHRISTOPHE
CM - N^o 18: William PARNELL
CM - N^o 19: Tömas DE VRIKT
AM - N^o 20: Raia TURI
LF - N^o 21: Red TYLER
ST - N^o 22: John PERCIVAL
RF - N^o 23: Ryan CASSIDY
Starting eleven
GK - N^o 25: John MARTIN
LD - N^o 26: Red MILLHOUSE
CD - N^o 29: Keone MAKAIO
CD - N^o 27: Tre URISTSON
RD - N^o 28: Ansel RYAN
CM - N^o 30: Ryan ANDSEN
CM - N^o 31: Kairo KAMARANI
AM - N^o 32: Casimir PAQUET
LF - N^o 33: Martin ALTING
ST - N^o 34: Tii ʻO UIREMA
RF - N^o 35: Georges ROUSSEAU
Omerica’s top scorers
John Percival - 3 goals
Georges Rousseau - 2 goals
Tömas de Vrikt - 2 goal
Neama Iokua - 2 goals
Tii ʻo Uirema - 1 goal
Casimir Paquet - 1 goal
Jan-Nikläs Rosenkränts - 1 goal
Kai Eko - 1 goal

World Cup 73 - RPing Thread

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