Watterson Bowl II (Everything)

by **Super-Llamaland** » Wed Mar 19, 2014 3:00 pm

welcome from Llamaland!

Welcome, one and all, to the second Watterson Bowl, NationStates' only Calvinball Tournament! Held in Super-Llamaland, this tournament promises to be a good one, as established nations and newcomers alike try to topple the Purple Lligers, defending world champions and national team of the hosts.

Discussion| Bid| Rankings (below)

This tournament is sponsored by RubberChick, the world's best spot for high-quality rubber chickens! Appease Margaret and do your favorite sports team proud at RubberChick!

Our goal is to have three groups of six nations. At the moment, we have the eighteen nations with two puppets that will be taken out if more signups come. At the moment, the participating nations are...

The eighteen nations have been split into three groups of six. These groups:

GROUP ONE

San Jose Guayabal (5)
Nassau-Hessen (7)
Arab County (UR)
The Crum Islands (UR)
Yaoi Indiana (UR)
Pineapplesburg (UR)

GROUP TWO

New Wolfopolis (2)
Barunia (UR)
Jeckland (UR)
The Fair Republic (UR)
The Vilkings (UR)
Numbers Puppet (UR)

GROUP THREE

Super-Llamaland (1)
The Republic of Lanos (UR)
Drekkevaas (UR)
Niebo (UR)
Hicana (UR)
Westbridge (UR)

They will be drawn against each other randomly. When a team loses three games, they are eliminated. When there are only two nations left, the two nations there will advance, with the tiebreaker being a coin flip. However, only two of the three third-place teams will advance, so after any tiebreakers needed are applied, the third-place teams will play a tiring Calvinball marathon, three matchdays in one, to determine the next two advancers to the quarterfinals.

ONLY THOSE NATIONS AND MODS ARE ALLOWED TO POST ON THIS THREAD.

The current unofficial Watterson Bowl rankings are:

Super-Llamaland: 1.111
New Wolfopolis: 0.667
Paradystopia: 0.667
Shadowbourne: 0.555
San Jose Guayabal: 0.444
Albaie: 0.444
Nassau-Hessen: 0.444
Hessington Island: 0.111

HOW TO START RPing

Good roleplaying starts with reading the stickies. read, please.

Next, construct a roster of your choice. Rosters are essential so you can RP about your players. In addition, quality rosters will increase your RP bonus, giving you a greater chance to win your matches. That's important, unless you want to lose. Most sports are pretty rigid about their roster, but Calvinball only requires that somebody play for you. There have been plenty of incidents where random people played for their team, and one of these people actually won a game for his team.

Also, please take the time and copy-paste these handy RP permissions into your roster, so nations know what they can do when RPing. While most sports have far more RP permissions than this, Calvinball is sort of dependent on what the more boring members of other forums would call "godmodding", so I've kept it to the following:

Code: Select all: Injure my players: Injure my players seriously: Kill my players: Godmod Injuries: Turn my players into fruit:

Anyways, after you post that roster, make sure to begin roleplaying. If you read the sticky (hint hint, read the sticky), you should get a sense of how to roleplay. Bad roleplaying will be frowned upon and give you a lower RP bonus than good roleplaying. Please read the host bid for more information if you want a better sense of RP grading and multiple RPs.

Good luck, and remember: Never play the same way twice!

NOTE: SCHEDULE

Friday, March 21: Group Draw

Thursday, March 27: MD1

Friday, March 28: MD2

Saturday, March 29: MD3

Sunday, March 30: MD4

Monday, March 31: MD5

Thursday, April 3: Inter-group Tiebreakers (if needed)

Friday, April 4: Quarterfinals

Saturday, April 5: Semifinals

Sunday, April 6: Finals

by **Super-Llamaland** » Wed Mar 19, 2014 3:01 pm

GROUP ONE
San Jose Guayabal (5)
Nassau-Hessen (7)
Arab County (UR)
The Crum Islands (UR)
Yaoi Indiana (UR)
Pineapplesburg (UR)
GROUP TWO
New Wolfopolis (2)
Barunia (UR)
Jeckland (UR)
The Fair Republic (UR)
The Vilkings (UR)
Numbers Puppet (UR)
GROUP THREE
Super-Llamaland (1)
The Republic of Lanos (UR)
Drekkevaas (UR)
Niebo (UR)
Hicana (UR)
Westbridge (UR)

by **Super-Llamaland** » Wed Mar 19, 2014 3:01 pm

reserved for IC

by **Super-Llamaland** » Wed Mar 19, 2014 3:46 pm

SUPER-LLAMALAND REDUNDANT REDUNDANT LLIGERS: Watterson Bowl Squad

Finishes:
WB I: Champions (9-0)
WB II: ? (0-0)

Players, Managers, and Others somewhat related

Dictator-For-Life and Chief Cartographer: Allen Byrdensky

Although his rule can be a bit rough, Allen Brydensky is not only the best dictator-for-life in Llamanean Calvinball History, he is the only dictator-for-life in Llamanean Calvinball History. Brydensky is an excellent cartographer with above-average pogo-stick skills.

President and First Racquetballer: Jonah Harbinger

Harbinger is a good president to Byrdensky and the best Racquetballer on the team.

Vice Dictator-For-Life: August Fitzgerald

Great at sniffing out plots to splash the team with water balloons. Fitzgerald does plenty of splashing himself with the many water balloons he holds in his trademarked Bottomless Pockets that are, in fact, bottomless.

Official Coder and Cartographer: Tyler Morrison

Morrison can break codes with the best of them. He famously decoded the "Random series of letters, numbers, and other random things and places code" where A is 244,593 J-Daffodil, B is 650,123 R-Nicaragua, and so on. He decoded this in one second, although it is suspected that he was told beforehand.

Chief of Playing Instruments: Dennis Cartel

Fantastic at playing every instrument except for the didgeridoo.

Attendant to the Naturalities: Garreth Dustbin

Garreth Dustbin is a fantastic Attendant to the Naturalities! Nobody is quite sure what he actually does, but he's good at it.

Fetcher: Tigerbot 6.0.1

Tigerbot 6.0.1, designed by Calvinball Inc., is perfect for fetching things and malfunctioning during gameplay. He's still very buggy, so there's no telling what Tigerbot will do. He may play for the other team, or he may run off the field and commit suicide (again) with a jump rope. Just be glad you weren't near Tigerbot 3.

Super-Sub: Ronaldo Finch

Ronaldo Finch can ride polo-horses, hit badminton birdies, fetch calvinballs, and make emergency masks with the best of 'em and is the secret weapon of the team.

by **Super-Llamaland** » Fri Mar 21, 2014 7:26 pm

Schedule: MD1

(yes, these are real field names. The mobile app to rig the scoreboard can be found at [url=nationstates.net]www.calvinballscoreboardrigger.com/downloadthistotallysafeapp[/url])

GROUP ONE:

San Jose Guayabal v. Arab County, Field 47-Sowhat
Nassau-Hessen v. The Crum Islands, Feild Scroospellin
Pineapplesburg v. Yaoi Indiana, Field Lookleft->

GROUP TWO:

New Wolfopolis @ Numbers Puppet, Field 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028441971
Barunia v. The Vilkings, Field >_<

Jeckland @ The Fair Republic, Field for the Playing of the Match Between Jeckland and the Fair Republic

GROUP THREE:

Super-Llamaland @ Hicana, Field Lligersaregreat
The Republic of Lanos @ Drekkvaas, Field Ideek-A
Niebo v. Westbridge, Field Ideek-B

Scoring will be done in the following manner:

30% Association Football: Represents the time you can spend in a pool of watermelon juice without breathing and the number of random gold coins you can collect while in there.
50% Gridiron Football: Represents the time you can ride around in a horse-drawn carriage looking for twenty-ninth base. It wouldn't be that fun if we told you where twenty-ninth base was.
20% Baseball: Represents the time you can blow on a drumset until it makes a gurgling noise.

If somebody got three goals in football/soccer, twenty-one points in gridiron, and two runs in baseball, their score would be

(3*3) + (5*21) + (2*2) = 105 + 9 + 4 = 118, with a consonant added afterwards.

by **Barunia** » Fri Mar 21, 2014 10:07 pm

Barunia's Calvinball Oversight Committee is not recognised by the Department of Sport and Leisure. This may have something to do with the fact that the paperwork was filled in with multi-coloured crayons. As such, the Calvinball team will have unofficial standing for the tournament.

The committee has launched a program to find players. The Calvinball Oversight Committee - Universal Play campaign (COC-UP) has found players using highly unconventional methods.

Time-travelling religious dude:John Calvin. A 16th-century preacher, Calvin was accosted by a scout of COC-UP, who dragged him into his time machine disguised as a telephone box. He may be confused, but he's going along with whatever happens in the belief that it must be God's will for him.

Actual real tiger because what could possibly go wrong?:Hannibal, a 140kg male Javan tiger, rescued from extinction through the power of time travel. Researchers for COC-UP found several ancient artworks of calvinball, in which human players competed alongside tigers. The Committee, wishing to create a modern team that is as true to the ancient game as possible, have thus created a team that mimics those of antiquity. Not that they bothered to give Hannibal any training...

Team uniforms: Players will wear masks of sky-blue, as well as newspaper hats in honour of Barunia's ancient de jure title of Inspirer of Names, whose traditional role included the folding of paper hats, bringing party cups, and ignoring arguments about second base. Hannibal's will be tied to his head with a string.

by **Yaoi Indiana** » Sat Mar 22, 2014 9:57 am

Yaoi Indiana Certified Chick Repellents enter their first Watterson Bowl

Roster

Coach: The disembodied consciousness of Sid Barrett

The disembodied consciousness of Sid Barrett has agreed to be Yaoi Indiana's coach for the game. He has extensive Calvinball knowledge which he gained in a mystical realm while on an LSD trip and he lives in William Tough-Enough's false teeth.

Spelunker Extraordinaire

William Tough-Enough. William Tough-Enough is the current holder of the Guinness Book of World Record's longest bowel movement. He prefers to compete in competitive bowel moving in caves, which he explores thoroughly before hand for signs of the little people. He has expert juggling skills. Don't ask us what he usually juggles.

Clone of Madeleine Albright

A clone of the former Secretary of State under Bill Clinton, Albright sings opera and can shatter any piece of glass within a 200 yard radius.

A homeless alien

Found on the streets of Chicago, a homeless alien is an expert at probing all sorts of things. He brought his tent so he could camp out on the Watterson Bowl field between games.

Team jerseys

Everyone will be dressed up as catgirls.

by **New Wolfopolis** » Sat Mar 22, 2014 8:01 pm

Jack Gunn
WBI Position: Lamellicorn
Gunn is the team's do-it-all. Whenever we don't have someone specifically to do something, Jack steps up. Gunn is built like a linebacker, and this gives him a slight specialty in tackling. Gunn is also one of the best grape soda scuba pig carriers in the world.

Will Clark
WBI Position: Martite
Clark is the athletic one on the team. He pogos, he kicks, he runs, he does everything related to athletics. He is skinny, short, and weighs about 130 pounds.

Thomas Pickett
WBI Position: Martite
No one really knows what Pickett does, I assume we'll find that out sometime during these games.

Lucy Parrino
WBI Position: Martite
Parrino went to college at the best music school in the country, Arjema Conservatory for the Arts, but she wasn't satisfied with just a career in music. She joined the Calvinball team to use her musical talent with a wide variety. Thus, she is the go-to music person on the team.

Danny Corbeil
WBI Position: Replacement
Corbeil was added to the team late last year, and he is an expert swimmer, animal identifier, and whacker.

Tammy Daniels
WBI Position: Replacement
Daniels, a marathon runner before joining the team, is the team's best runner, and has a minor from Random College in hopping.

Ricky Lewis
WBI Position: Replacement
Ricky can skip like Nobodys Business, who was formerly the best skipper in New Wolfopolis. After Lewis took over that title, he joined the Calvinball team.

Brenda Magner
WBI Position: Replacement
Brenda is another wild card, just like Pickett and Gunn.

Amanda Henry
Manager
Amanda can be mad when the team wins by fifty points. She can be happy when the team loses by fifty points. Her emotions fluctuate so much, many speculate she's bipolar. Regardless, she can still motivate the team incredibly well.

by **Hicana** » Tue Mar 25, 2014 7:25 pm

Team Hicana: Watterson Bowl II

Here's the Hicana "Jiso Aiisidsks". The words "Jiso Aiisidsks" in the Hicanan language mean "Jiso Aiisidsks". Somebody thought it would sound nice.

Chief of Being Chief: Justin Hendricks. Good at pogo sticking, scuba diving, cow milking, flag waving, and song singing.
Chief of Not Being Chief: Liam Wendell. Dislikes Hendricks. Believes firmly in the value of goat milking, banner waving, poem reading, jump roping, and dolphin diving.
Chief of Being Chief, Sort of: Devon McGuire. A musical instrument suckfest. Can drive opposing players away.
Chief of Being 80% Chief and 20% Non-Chief: Alec McKenzie. Better at playing instruments and heals the ears of the players after McGuire.
Chief of Marginally Being Chief: Jacob Su. Has memorized every multiplication fact up to 100 times 100. You never know.
Chief of Being an Optimistic Chief of Being an Optimistic Chief of Being an Optimistic...: Andrew Williams. Is always optimistic and can cheer up the team in any situation. Pundits suspect drugs.
Chief of Chiefing: Drew Harold: Great at throwing things, making weapons, and drinking orange juice.
Chief of Being Chief in a Way Completely Unlike Justin: Matthew Prince: A fantastic hole-digger with a talent in chugging liquids.

Who Plays with Who

The team lacks chemistry, so many of the players hate each other. Hendricks will only play with Prince, Su, or Williams. Wendell won't play with Hendricks, McGuire, Prince, or Williams. McGuire can't play with Harold but needs to play with McKenzie or Hendricks. McKenzie will only play if Su, Prince, or Harold are on, but not if Wendell is playing. Su will play with everybody except for McGuire, who hurts his ears, and Williams, who creeps him out. Williams is too optimistic to not want to play with somebody. Harold will play with everybody but Prince, McGuire, or Williams. And Prince will only play with Hendricks, Wendell, or Williams.

by **Super-Llamaland** » Thu Mar 27, 2014 6:18 am

Scores: Day One

GROUP A

San Jose Guayabal 141s - 137k Arab County
The Crum Islands 91c - 17y Nassau-Hessen
Yaoi Indiana 179w - 139d Pineapplesburg

GROUP B

New Wolfopolis 94q- 64r Numbers Puppet
Barunia 79j - 78l The Vilkings
Jeckland 151t - 138j The Fair Republic

GROUP C

Super-Llamaland 182j - 60v Hicana
The Republic of Lanos 134l - 100d Drekkevaas
Niebo 130j - 103f Westbridge

reason for all edits: converted a reminder into a 30-minute warning, 10-minute warning, cutoff, scores, changed format for a few edits. all scores are fair.

by **Super-Llamaland** » Thu Mar 27, 2014 5:36 pm

Scorination tomorrow will be done at 21:00-22:00 GMT in this fashion. Matchups to come shortly.

10% Soccer: Represents a score of how well you boil six pots of potatoes to the temperature of "well-cooked and then some" without a stove.
30% Football: Represents how many woodchucks you can throw into a pile of wood in two minutes.
60% Baseball: Represents score of how well you can form a human frustum.

MATCHUPS:

group a
San Jose Guayabal v. Pineapplesburg, Field Hook Aires
Nassau-Hessen v. Arab County, Field Nomnomnom
The Crum Islands v. Yaoi Indiana, Field Ledditgo

group b
New Wolfopolis v. Jeckland, Field Emoticon
Barunia v. Numbers Puppet, Field Go Barunipuppets
The Fair Republic v. The Vilkings, Field Thiswontendwell

group c
Super-Llamaland v. Niebo, Field Sow Utt
The Republic of Lanos v. Westbridge, Field Googlechrome > Otherbrowsers
Drekkevaas v. Hicana, Field Bwahaha

by **Super-Llamaland** » Fri Mar 28, 2014 12:15 pm

GROUP ONE

San Jose Guayabal 86j - 84j Pineapplesburg
Nassau-Hessen 81s - 105j Arab County
Yaoi Indiana 115k - 82s The Crum Islands

1. San Jose Guayabal (2-0)
Yaoi Indiana (2-0)
3. Arab County (1-1)
The Crum Islands (1-1)
5. Nassau-Hessen (0-2)
Pineapplesburg (0-2) (nations underlined are at risk of elimination tomorrow)

GROUP TWO

New Wolfopolis 60i - 37e Jeckland
Barunia 51w - 68o Numbers Puppet
The Fair Republic 112s - 75j The Vilkings

1. New Wolfopolis (2-0)
2. Jeckland (1-1)
Barunia (1-1)
Numbers Puppet (1-1)
The Fair Republic (1-1)
6. The Vilkings (0-2)

GROUP THREE

Super-Llamaland 48d - 53a Niebo
Republic of Lanos 67f - 57k Westbridge
Drekkevaas 27l - 110d Hicana
Super-Llamaland 182j - 60v Hicana
The Republic of Lanos 134l - 100d Drekkevaas
Niebo 130j - 103f Westbridge

1. Niebo (2-0)
The Republic of Lanos (2-0)
3. Super-Llamaland (1-1)
Hicana (1-1)
5. Westbridge (0-2)
Drekkevaas (0-2)

by **Super-Llamaland** » Fri Mar 28, 2014 3:45 pm

As Calvinball runs on RPs, I urge everybody to roleplay.

To give people more incentive to roleplay, I will randomly distribute at most three RP challenges throughout the tournament: one during the group stage, one during the tiebreakers, and one before the finals. They will add .5 to your rank each if you complete them, thus raising your chances of advancing.

All right, Draw for MD3!

Group 1:

San Jose Guayabal (2-0) v. Nassau-Hessen (0-2), Field OfDreams
Arab County (1-1) v. Yaoi Indiana (2-0), Field Offails
Pineapplesburg (0-2) v. The Crum Islands (1-1), Field Comehitherandwithunacquaintedeye

Pineapplesburg and Nassau-Hessen are at risk of elimination from the Watterson Bowl.

Group 2:

New Wolfopolis (2-0) v. Barunia (1-1), Field Idontreallycare
Jeckland (1-1) v. Numbers Puppet (1-1), Field Savethepandas
The Fair Republic (1-1) v. The Vilkings (0-2), Field AUUGH

The Vilkings is at risk of elimination from the Watterson Bowl.

Group 3:

Niebo (2-0) v. Drekkevaas (0-2), Field We'reWBCChampsnyahnyah!
The Republic of Lanos (2-0) v. Super-Llamaland (1-1), Field Look,anemoticon!
Hicana (1-1) v. Westbridge (0-2), Field Isthatalandmine?

Westbridge and Drekkevaas are at risk of elimination from the Watterson Bowl.

Scorination tomorrow will be done like so:

40% soccer: Represents the time needed for you to complete "The Obstacle Course o' Fiery Death"
50% gridiron: Represents the score you get from making papaya-and-samurai sword smoothies without a blender
10% baseball: Represents the score you get from doing calisthenics while dressed in a parka

by **Yaoi Indiana** » Fri Mar 28, 2014 5:04 pm

William Tough-Enough was pogo sticking through the Super-Llamalands super llamic caverns scraping guano off the ceiling and collecting it in a pouch slung across his neck. It was hard to pogo in these tight quarters without banging your head on the ceiling or impaling on a stalagmight.

"Just a little bit more," he fooged, "and we'll be complete with the red spectrum. I'll be checking violet next."

"HEWWWOOOO!!!" said his dentures. "Crum islands... crum, crumminy, crum: gross stuff says the dolphins of Dale!"

Tough-Enough jumped off the popo stick and laid it on the ground. Madeleine Albright handed him a pile of dirt. He closed one nostril, and snorted it.

"Ah, that's the stuff," he said, and turning towards Albright, fluttered his eyes.

"Yes, yes, the differentials simply are swamped before the vagaries of the cosmologial constant," she limped as she projectile vomited against the opposite wall, completing her portrait of the Mona Lisa painted entirely with gastrointestinal fluid.

"I quite agree," said the homeless alien, gesturing towards the stalagpipes, "and as soon as I finish impaling these thoughts on the cieling, I think we should move to another cave.'

"Coach Barret?" dealt Tough-Enough.

A grumpy voiced neighed.

"What? Some chap named the Doctor left his spaceship lying around and me and a friend are converting into a hydroponic marijuana grow so, as you can hear, I'm a little busy."

"Sorry coach, its just that I need the thing."

"Oh very well," the dentures snoofed.

Tough-Enough felt the familiar funnels in his furnucular and opened his mouth to spore out a torrent of blue light that swept the cavern and died every thing violent. Tough-Enough eyed the cieling and saw piles of blue dyed guano as thick as Texas.

"Awwww! This is going to take forever to clean up," he squeered.

"Well, I think we have enough vice quanta for now," replied Albright, "so why don't we look for a new cave?"

"Good idea. Engage brain dive."

"Oh Tough-Enough you naughty boy, you know that tickles," something skiggled.

"Oh sorry, we won't be long, we're just looking for another cave."

"Well you've found one. Look right here. Oh, but it seems to be occupied. Some nutter is jumping up and down on a pogo stick..."

William Chuff-Enough was pogo sticking through the Super-Llamalands super llamic caverns scraping marshmellow paste off the ceiling and collecting it in a pouch slung across his neck. It was hard to pogo in these tight quarters without banging your head on the ceiling or impaling on a stalagmight.

"Just a little bit more," he squooged, "and we'll be complete with the red spectrum. I'll be checking violet next."

"BWAIN-ASS TARD-EEZ!!!" said his dentures. "Crum islands... crum, crumminy, crum: gross stuff says the minotaurs of Male!"

Chuff-Enough jumped off the popo stick and laid it on the ground. Madeleine Not-Right handed him a pile of sand. He closed one nostril, and snorted it.

"Ah, that's the stuff," he said, and turning towards Not-Right, fluttered his nostrils.

"Yes, yes, the differentials simply are swamped before the vagaries of the cosmologial constant," she slimped as she projectile vomited against the opposite wall, completing her portrait of the Mona Glisa painted entirely with half-digested pumpkin pie.

"I quite agree," said the homeless alien, gesturing towards the stalagpipes, "and as soon as I finish impaling these actions on the cieling, I think we should move to another cave.'

"Coach Garret?" fealt Chuff-Enough.

A grumpy voiced boiled.

"What? Some chap named the Doctor left his spaceship lying around and me and a friend are converting into a hydroponic marijuana grow so, as you can hear, I'm a little busy."

"Sorry coach, its just that I need the thing."

"Oh very well," the dentures stoofed.

Chuff-Enough felt the familiar funnels in his farraday and opened his mouth to spore out a torrent of blue light that swept the cavern and died every thing violent. Chuff-Enough eyed the cieling and saw piles of blue dyed marshmellow paste as thick as Wyoming.

"Awwww! This is going to take forever to clean up," he squired.

"Well, I think we have enough vice quanta for now," replied Not-Right, "so why don't we look for a new cave?"

"Good idea. Engage brain dive."

"Oh Chuff-Enough you naughty boy, you know that tickles," something figgled.

"Oh sorry, we won't be long, we're just looking for another cave."

"Well you've found one. Look right here. Oh, but it seems to be occupied. Some nutter is jumping up and down on a pogo stick..."

William Huff-Enough was pogo sticking through the Super-Llamalands super llamic caverns scraping mysterious fluids off the ceiling and collecting it in a pouch slung across his neck. It was hard to pogo in these tight quarters without banging your head on the ceiling or impaling on a stalagmight.

"Just a little bit more," he splarged, "and we'll be complete with the red spectrum. I'll be checking violet next."

"GOO-TEN DAAAG!!!" said his dentures. "Crum islands... crum, crumminy, crum: gross stuff says the kretins of Kale!"

Huff-Enough jumped off the popo stick and laid it on the ground. Madeleine All-Right handed him a pile of sugar. He closed one nostril, and snorted it.

"Ah, that's the stuff," he said, and turning towards All-Right, fluttered his pimples.

"Yes, yes, the differentials simply are swamped before the vagaries of the cosmologial constant," she slimped as she projectile vomited against the opposite wall, completing her portrait of the Mona Grisa painted entirely with pepto bismal.

"I quite agree," said the homeless alien, gesturing towards the stalagpipes, "and as soon as I finish impaling these philosophies on the cieling, I think we should move to another cave.'

"Coach Ferret?" spealt Huff-Enough.

A grumpy voiced smoothed.

"What? Some chap named the Doctor left his spaceship lying around and me and a friend are converting into a hydroponic marijuana grow so, as you can hear, I'm a little busy."

"Sorry coach, its just that I need the thing."

"Oh very well," the dentures strooved.

Huff-Enough felt the familiar funnels in his fardlebee and opened his mouth to spore out a torrent of blue light that swept the cavern and died every thing violent. Huff-Enough eyed the cieling and saw piles of blue dyed mysterious fluid as thick as West Virginia.

"Awwww! This is going to take forever to clean up," he squired.

"Well, I think we have enough vice quanta for now," replied All-Right, "so why don't we look for a new cave?"

"Good idea. Engage brain dive."

"Oh Huff-Enough you naughty boy, you know that tickles," something flaggled.

"Oh sorry, we won't be long, we're just looking for another cave."

"Well you've found one. Look right here. Oh, but it seems to be occupied. Some nutter is jumping up and down on a pogo stick..."

William Gruff-Enough was pogo sticking through the Super-Llamalands super llamic caverns scraping shadows off the ceiling and collecting it in a pouch slung across his neck....

by **Jeckland** » Sat Mar 29, 2014 1:51 am

The Jeckland Destroyers were in Super-Llamaland, preparing for their third match. The ten man squad consisted of destroyers 1-9, and Larry. Destroyers 1-9 were there to try to stop the players from the other team scoring any points, and Larry scores all Jeckland's points. It's an unusual strategy, but it worked against The Fair Republic, as they dunked the Fair Republic's players heads in watermelon juice, drugged their horses, and destroyed their drumsets, while the incredible Larry scored 151f points on his own. However the plan came unstuck against New Wolfopolis, as Larry accidentally set fire to his woodchucks whilst trying to boil the potatoes. He also struggled to make a human frustum all by himself. Jeckland however will press on with their unusual technique in the hope it brings them victory.

by **Super-Llamaland** » Sat Mar 29, 2014 1:56 pm

Group 1

San Jose Guayabal 108c - 69f Nassau-Hessen
Arab County 128g - 188s Yaoi Indiana
Pineapplesburg 116y - 63n The Crum Islands

1. San Jose Guayabal (3-0)
Yaoi Indiana (3-0)
3. Arab County (1-2)
The Crum Islands (1-2)
Pineapplesburg (1-2)
~~6. Nassau-Hessen (0-3)~~

Group 2

New Wolfopolis 170k - 121t Barunia
Jeckland 82w - 139s Numbers Puppet
The Fair Republic 165j - The Vilkings 110g

1. New Wolfopolis (3-0)
2. Numbers Puppet (2-1)
The Fair Republic (2-1)
4. Jeckland (1-2)
Barunia (1-2)
~~6. The Vilkings (0-3)~~

Group 3

Niebo 169s - 83n Drekkevaas
Hicana 59w - 83k Westbridge
Super-Llamaland 85y - The Republic of Lanos 46f

1. Niebo (3-0)
2. The Republic of Lanos (2-1)
Super-Llamaland (2-1)
4. Hicana (1-2)
Westbridge (1-2)
~~Drekkevaas (0-3)~~

Congrats to all of the nations that survived today, and commiserations to those that were eliminated. There were eighteen, now there were fifteen. Soon, there will be eight. Will it be you?

by **Super-Llamaland** » Sat Mar 29, 2014 8:21 pm

RP Challenge for tomorrow: Write rhyming haiku.

Example of rhyming haiku (you can't use this at all):

I like to catch rats
That I find under my mats
And give them to cats

Tomorrow's guidelines and schedule will be up ASAP, but around 1800 GMT. Scorination will be about eight hours later.

by **Super-Llamaland** » Sun Mar 30, 2014 10:54 am

Scorination today will be done like so:

10% soccer - represents how many rhyming haikus you can make in negative-eight minutes.
80% football - represents how many chucks you would have chucked had woodchucks not been wooden chuck woods.
10% baseball - represents how hard you can concentrate on orange juice.

Matchups! (if you're in underline, you're at risk of elimination)

Group 1
(note: Yaoi Indiana gets a bye for being the luckiest [coin flip] undefeated team in this group.)

San Jose Guayabal (3-0) v. The Crum Islands (1-2), Field Vitamin-Ten
Arab County (1-2) v. Pineapplesburg (1-2), Field Petunia-Six

Group 2
(note: New Wolfopolis gets a bye for being in first)

Numbers Puppet (2-1) v. Barunia (1-2), Field Slapstick
The Fair Republic (2-1) v. Jeckland (1-2), Field Uranium-Nineteen

Group 3
(note: Niebo gets a bye for being in first)

Super-Llamaland (2-1) v. Westbridge (1-2), Field Urchin-One
The Republic of Lanos (2-1) v. Hicana (1-2), Field Monkey-Ninetyeight

by **Jeckland** » Sun Mar 30, 2014 12:53 pm

WE WERE BEATEN BY NUMBERS

The Destroyers were beaten by a group of large men dressed as numbers. This somewhat ruined the gameplan, as their suits were not flammable, so despite the team's best efforts they could not set them on fire during the obstacle course. Whilst the Numbers Puppet suits were not flammable, Larry is. After the fire extinguisher had been pulled away from the rabid squirrel pack and used on Larry, the resourceful team smashed it over the opponenets. However they chopped up Larry's papaya's with their swords, so that made it even. By now Numbers Puppet were so far ahead that Larry left, and started composing haikus in his head.

My name is Larry
No, my name is not Harry
I am not married

Why do these all rhyme?
Every single fucking time
Well, it ain't a crime.

Why do I write these
My rhyming complex they please
Man, I need some cheese.

by **Super-Llamaland** » Sun Mar 30, 2014 7:32 pm

CUT! Will we know our final eight after today? Or at least a decent list?

by **Super-Llamaland** » Sun Mar 30, 2014 8:21 pm

GROUP A

Group One

San Jose Guayabal 216k - 136j The Crum Islands
Arab County 128p - Pineapplesburg 168j

And then there were three.

1. San Jose Guayabal (4-0)
2. Yaoi Indiana (3-0)
3. Pineapplesburg (2-2)
3. Arab County (1-3)
The Crum Islands (1-3)
6. Nassau-Hessen (0-3)

Group Two

Barunia 178y - 0g Numbers Puppet
The Fair Republic 48k - 210w Jeckland

And then there were five.

1. New Wolfopolis (3-0)
2. Numbers Puppet (2-2)
The Fair Republic (2-2)
Jeckland (2-2)
Barunia (2-2)
~~6. The Vilkings (0-3)~~

Group Three

Super-Llamaland 209w - 130n Westbridge
The Republic of Lanos 152s - 128p Hicana

And then there were three.

1. Niebo (3-0)
2. The Republic of Lanos (3-1)
Super-Llamaland (3-1)
4. Hicana (1-3)
Westbridge (1-3)
6. Drekkevaas (0-3)

by **Super-Llamaland** » Mon Mar 31, 2014 2:20 pm

There are eleven teams left. Here, have a schedule for TOMORROW, where scores will be up around 2:00 PM Pacific Time.

Here is how scores will be made tomorrow:

5x the soccer score: Represents how many operating systems you can mock in five minutes.

4x the gridiron score: Represents your ability to count sheep.

1x the baseball score: Represents your ability to convince a dead duck to go for a walk.

by **Super-Llamaland** » Wed Apr 02, 2014 5:20 pm

Numbers Puppet 64r - The Fair Republic 200h
Pineapplesburg 88m - Yaoi Indiana 95p
Jeckland 56y - New Wolfopolis 35r
The Republic of Lanos 63t - Niebo 106g

So, going into the playoffs, we have the final group standings! Green means you're in the final eight, Blue means you're in the playoffs, yellow means you might be in the playoffs, red means you're not playing any longer, and Super-Llamaland thanks you for travelling to play in the Watterson Bowl.

GROUP ONE
T1. San Jose Guayabal (4-0)
T1. Yaoi Indiana (4-0)
3. Pineapplesburg (2-3)
3. Arab County (1-3)
The Crum Islands (1-3)
6. Nassau-Hessen (0-3)

GROUP TWO
1. New Wolfopolis (3-1)
T2. The Fair Republic (3-2)
T2. Jeckland (3-2)
4. Barunia (2-2)
5. Numbers Puppet (2-3)
6. The Vilkings (0-3)

GROUP THREE

1. Niebo (4-0)
2. Super-Llamaland (3-1)
3. The Republic of Lanos (3-2)
T4. Hicana (1-3)
T4. Westbridge (1-3)
6. Drekkevaas (0-3)

by **Yaoi Indiana** » Thu Apr 03, 2014 8:55 am

"Do androids dream of electric sheep?" asked Tough Enough.

"I'm not sure, not being an android, forthwith," said the homeless alien, "but I count 93 in this pasture. Oops, watch out for the patty."

Tough Enough picked his way gingerly forward as Albright walked/ half dragged her frankenduck through the grass.

"OS X, and Windows are just rip offs of Linux, in my opinion, all the innovation happens in Linux and then Apple and Microsoft pick up on it a couples years later and then market it," opined Albright.

"Well yeah they're all stupid because they're all based on UNIX and UNIX sounds like eunichs, which is very silly, in my opinion," said Tough Enough.

"Well I don't care either which way because I personally am not a goat," said the homeless alien.

by **The Republic of Lanos** » Thu Apr 03, 2014 11:30 am

And now, Lanos National Sports.

And would you believe it! The Lanosian Calvinball team has made it into the playoffs! It's unprecedented how the Lanosians could make it in their first showing of the sport in international competition! As we continue to gather reactions from average Lanosians, here's some of what we gathered:

"What is Calvinball?"
"Oh, the sport in Calvin and Hobbes? Wow! I used to play that as a kid!"
"...this is a serious sport?"

Unfortunately, the sport has yet to achieve common knowledge in Lanos. Stay tuned.

Watterson Bowl II (Everything)

Watterson Bowl II (Everything)

Who is online