World Cup 68 RP Thread

[Glaser]

The reason for life / Wedisel Travot

A atmosphere never seen before at the Df'kroll arena happened. The gate 5 fanatics arranged balloons, flags, banners, and all the needed equipment for the best supporting a team can get. All was ready. Glaser, the small nation that started their international performances at the 54th Baptism of Fire was about to host the monks ranked at number 7 in the world. It shows us the progress of our community over the last few years... anyways, let's get talking.

Match Review

Glaser started playing very defensively because of their mental fear of their opponents; and it is known that Glaser suffers from a bad defense. At the sixth minute father John the Clairvoyant passed inside the box to the swift Bathasius who arrived to the ball earlier than his marker Hordro and released a decent shot from a tough angle that G'kroll just managed to absorb into his hands. Meliss gave Hordro a quick shouting lecture including many swearwords that the monks from The Archregimancy didn't like to hear very much. They had 84 more minutes to handle that horror.

Again the pressure that the Glaserians applied to the ball movement all around the midfield of the Archregimancy didn't show much good. Manuel the commanding freed himself from the guarding of Puliito, and had all the time and space in the world to progress into the Dragon's half without any of the defenders daring to leave their line and approach him, he reached the box and fired a shot that luckily for the home side ricocheted of the bar to a goal kick.

Frund Meliss fortunately had the brains to see how the Archregimancy decimate his low defense, and ordered his back line to go up high and try to stop that kind of attacks. They were in turn more vulnerable to through balls. Mur lost Glaser's possession after finally some decent ball movement at the 37th minute mark, George the Thoughtful cleanly stole it from him and blasted a pass to the rocket-fast Irenaeus. Irenaeus used Harss'l's slow pace and a bad line exit by G'kroll to easily chip above him a decide the one zero. To the delight of the Dragon's of Gate 5, instead of going to pray with his teammates he went immediately to the linesman and confessed in a truly unusual (for the Glaserians) manner that he was in offside. His gesture will surely be stored in all the citizens of Glaser's heart.

The first half closed with the Red Dragon's first shot on target after some potshots. Dret came back from his regular position to get some ball time, rouletted around Auxentius the Stern and swerved a great shot that produced a great flying save by Pachomius the Sure of Hand. Stephen the Wonderworker watched his players come off the pitch with a poker face and went together with them to the changing rooms to pray (to their well-being, those Glaser fans are so frightening!).

The second the Red Dragon players started the second half, they felt different. Was it the playing style, was it the motivation... I really can't tell! 7 minutes after the break the Christians had their first lock breaker opportunity: after all, they're still better ranked. Fullback Auxentius the Kind came up to help offense and got the ball unmarked near the corner spot. He lifted the ball over the whole center of the field and it reached the head of the other fullback Auxentius the Merciful which from very far away impressed the audience and headbutted the ball right on target, just to the leg of Erhof G'kroll.

The Archregimancy applied heavy pressure on all the Glaserian players; In the 74th minute mark W'deyir kicked away the ball under pressure and Theodosius headed it right to M'nor. M'nor found Mur running unmarked and let loose a magnificent pass to the running Mur. Bronde'e dribbled until the 35 meter mark, swerved on marksman Auxentius the Ascetic, feinted a pass to Dret and then sidestepped right and blasted Pachomius' goal and even he couldn't stop that shot. The stadium erupted and rumors say there was a slight earthquake at that area.

The last notable play of the game came from the away side. Auxentius the Merciful started a flank run from the way a gracefully passed Gvet on the way to the corner area. He then crossed just to the head of Bathasius the Nimble who in his turn nudged the ball to the Glaserian net. It hit G'kroll, ricocheted off the bar and was booted away by Hordro. All the supporters let out a sigh of relief.

When the referee whistled for the end of the match, an impressive record of alcoholic drinks was sold in the following hours. The Gate 5 Dragons celebrated in the streets and had even a slight confrontation with the police (ugh, Glaser police). They were recorded on video cameras singing:
Come on, ye Backstreet Monks
sing a song about us now [repeat until morning]

As you can see, they're not the sophisticated type of people.


The Red Dragon's formation for the following game against the German American States.

I don't have enough time both to RP the German American State's game and both Chiata's. I'm going to skip the GAS game unfortunately but it shouldn't effect my RP bonus (because I will post the Chiata game RP instead)

[Neu Engollon]

---

"Good evening, Neu Engollon. Karl Demais right here on the NETV Sports 7 Update. The Goats are locking in a solid third place going into the halfway point of the stage. Matches against Karditan and Hicana have given the Goats a better chance to possibly qualify out of Group 13 and move on the furthest they have in any World Cup to date. I have the new coach here via video chat. Coach Feinbaum. Thank you for being with us."

"You bet, Karl."

"So, Coach, did you think that you would make it this far on your first year taking over the team from Coach Henau?

"Events are going well, Karl. We put in the time and the hard work. We had some players retire and some come up and we all bonded in the off season. We have been preparing for this since the final whistle of our final WC match last year."

"Yes, well, let's not get ahead of ourselves. You're not there yet."

"No, we are not. We are halfway...and a lot can happen in the meantime, but we are hopeful, for sure. The team have been playing as hard as they can, and it has paid off for sure."

"You were the assistant coach before taking the top spot, Coach Feinbaum. You have a unique perspective of how the team reacted to Coach Henau versus how they are responding to you now. Is it any different?"

"Um...no, I don't think so, Karl. Like you said, I was Assistant coach first. They're familiar with me and so they are on the same page as far as how hard we're going to work to keep progressing. It's not going to get there overnight. We all know that. But we're on our way and we're not slacking off. Every game should be a go for gold effort."

"So, do you think that this is a comment on the Remy Henau era? That he didn't get the team to progress to where they needed in International play?"

"No. Please, no. I have nothing but respect for Coach Henau and it was a pleasure to work for him. He had his style and I have mine. There were a lot of factors that went in to why its taking some time, and will continue to do so, for Neu Engollon to become a world class team to be reckoned with."

"Such as?"

"Such as...the player dynamic. Getting the right positions filled with the right people. Getting a feel for how these other top teams play and how to counter their attacks. We haven't been on the world stage for that long. These things take time and Coach Henau...Remy, was in on the infant, growing pains stage. He did the grunt work and I hope to take the glory for his hard work."

*laughs*..."That's honest and humble of you."

"Yes...well, it's true. I will cash in on Remy's hard work. The man had a flare for coaching, but he didn't quite have the full product there to work with, just the barest raw materials. Now I get to put the finishing touches on and bring us into the next phase."

"Getting to qualifying. Possibly playoffs?"

"People scoff, but sure...why not? Maybe not this year, but in the next few years. I think we could have a shot. Last year, did anyone think we could beat a team like Karditan or tie a team like Saugeais?"

"Let's touch on that Coach. How do you feel that match went?"

"It was cathartic, what can I say, Karl? The Goats went out and played it out like clockwork. This is Portico's team. He's a master. They beat Mizuyuki, who killed us earlier. This was no pushover competition. Swing and Zevaya had to be shut down. Evergreen, Derringer and Milosivek needed to be peeled off. It was like a war of attrition with us coming out a few extra men standing..."

"Don't they have pon-"

"So, yeah. We fought for that, and kept a one goal lead. That's it. But that's all we needed."

"Great. We just need to do that to Hicana, and keep it rolling."

"That's always the plan. We're giving it our all. I need to get back to the team."

"Thanks for talking with us, Coach Nils Feinbaum."

"Thanks for having me on the show, Karl. Always a pleasure."

"Keep watching Neu Engollon. We'll go to Hicana match previews and some highlights of the match with the Karditanis after the break..."

[Nexxus Drako]

Nexxus Drako 3–1 Gyatso-kai
17' Robert Hill
49', 57' Lio Golt

The Nexxus Drako Age

Jym Tymplr State Funeral
Author: Reporter Amelia North

After the suicide of Jym Tymplr, as well as his wife Skyalina, people were left wondering whether Matthew Parker would announce a state funeral. He did.

The funeral was held three days before the World Cup Qualifiers match at home against Gyatso-kai, so as not to clash for everyone's attention. Over 3.5 million people attended the march to the government building, and 7,500 lucky citizens, 600 of them House of Representatives members, were able to get in for the memorial service.

It was a sombre day, as we remembered and celebrated the life of our great and esteemed leader, who saved us from the clutches of Bryn Wlsn on January 1st 2011, and brought back democracy on April 31st 2015, which was just one month ago.

With Jym's son Alestr being an orphan and Jym having no other family to speak of, Alestr has inherited all D$350 million of Jym's assets, which have been put into trust for his 18th birthday, which is 14 years away.

Alestr is now in the care of Skyalina's brother, Lio Golt, Striker for Nexxus Drako's national football team, and club player for the Drako Dragons.

In other news, Gloraixian President Aaron Swift has spoken to the media about his support for the new government and sorrow for death of Jym and Skyalina Tymplr. He was quoted saying "Nexxus Drako has lost a great leader, one who after 5 years of fixing the nation, brought back democracy and ultimately, fell to his own demons. I have a firm belief the new government of Nexxus Drako led by Matthew Parker will guide the nation well."

The Nexxus Drako Age urges anyone contemplating suicide to ring LifeLine on +313 1300-LIFE-LINE.

[New Sideburn]

It was Cathy Stokes' hundredth game with the national team.

She'd richly deserved it, most would agree. She was only the most recent of the team to reach the century, as many from the original campaign were starting to chalk it up - Dale Brightley, for example, had only just reached it. But Cathy was, after all, the captain - and her ascension was something special.

Jess Mortlock had had a quiet word of congratulations, and wished her well for the future. And Cathy had accepted it graciously, though keeping her thoughts to herself. Why all the fuss? A hundred is just a number.

Her name got a large cheer from the Sideburnese end of the field as the Daineri PA called it out. She rose her hands to clap back at them in response. A good turnout for an important match - Dainer would be no pushovers, and their odd selection of four central midfielders mirrored the Sideburnese diamond. And after all... they had the home advantage. Strange choice of team, though... Daineri had more than a few players abroad, yet it didn't seem like they had chosen any of them.

Didn't pay to waste too much time thinking about it, anyway. Just like reaching the century of caps, which really just made her feel old. So she went to the centre circle, shook Bergsten's hand firmly and put it out of her mind.

Eleven minutes had passed and the Cormorants were flying, ratchetting up a two-goal lead through Rook Cathar and Dale Brightley. Their physical advantage was making itself clearly felt. And it looked like a third was brewing, as Gareth Crowley played Cath through on the left. She latched onto the pass, saw right-back Ivonildes coming and feinted away - but the sliding challenge caught her heavily on the knee.

Sideburnese footballers didn't dive and they didn't cry - Cath slammed into the turf clutching her right leg, jamming a spare hand into her mouth to keep from screaming, and everyone knew it was bad. Gareth was first to the scene, demanding an excuse from an unrepentant Ivonildes, and Mike Brandon and Rook were next to the scene, kneeling down to her - Michael waved for the physios.

Cath glanced sickly at them as they raced over, short, heavyset Jacqui Sutherton and lanky Tom Keohane - they could have been a comedy double act. "How d'you feel, Cath?" asked Jacqui.
"Fuckin' awful."
"Can you walk?"
"Yeah... yeah maybe. Prob'ly not run."
There was a chorus of boos from the Daineri fans as Ivonildes got booked behind them.
Jacqui shrugged. "If you can't run... should we sub you out?"
"No, no!" said Cath quickly. "I reckon I can ... walk this one off." She pulled on Jacqui's arm to stand up, and tested her weight on her legs. The travelling support cheered. "Fuck, though... not as young as I used to be, eh?"
Jacqui looked doubtful. "If you aren't sure you'll be fine, then you can sub off."
Cath shook her head. "I'll last. Trust me."

She did eventually have to come off when she took another knock in the 55th-minute mark... the Sideburnese were 3-1 up then from Harper's direct free kick and the game looked set to keep that way. It was comic, really - the slapstick case of the player getting knocked off possession, momentum keeping her going all the way into the stands. But it fucking hurt an already-fucked knee, and she reluctantly waved for Amanda to come on in her place.

But that was the nice thing about being stuck in the stands. The fans over her head stood to applaud her off the pitch, as she half-walked, half-trudged away. She turned to wave... no, to salute, that was more fitting a tribute to their loyalty, for coming all this way for the squad.

Most of them, she couldn't help but smile to notice, saluted back.

[Jeru FC]

Princess Katy and the Jeru FC coach Andre

Katy: Well, that's what you call an away win
Andre: Yes, but what happened to Jeruselem today?
Katy: They almost didn't make the game
Andre: They lost anyway
Katy: Well, it isn't bad a result considering they didn't get much sleep before the game
Andre: Oh yes, the Jeruselem team doesn't dubious drug to keep awake unlike this lot

Katy: What were they smoking? I'd like to have some of it
Andre: Don't ask me. I don't participate in these things
Katy: But doesn't the coach need to know everything?
Andre: I should but I don't want to know really
Katy: Well, they should keep using it
Andre: I have no idea what they did today to play so well

Katy: So nothing to do with you?
Andre: Nothing, they seemed motivated without me even saying much
Katy: Probably watching too much porn
Andre: I guess that's safer than doing dubious drugs
Katy: Well, it did the job
Andre: Yes, no wonder they play better at home

Katy: No doubt, they got something special stuff at home
Andre: I'm just here to make sure they keep it ... straight and legal
Katy: Maybe that's why my sister didn't do well with them
Andre: She is a control freak
Katy: She wouldn't tolerate them doing drugs
Andre: As long as they don't do anything bad or kill someone

Katy: If I was in charge, none of that funny business under my charge
Andre: You sound like your sister
Katy: Well, my mother was pretty bad like that too
Andre: It's in the genes hey?
Katy: I guess it is but I wouldn't change a thing
Andre: You're one in charge in your relationship

Katy: I sure am
Andre: No wonder people confuse you with your sister
Katy: I'm far less extreme ... in Dallas terms
Andre: Older children get the worst parts of their parents
Katy: I noticed that
Andre: Take it from a man who's seen it all

[Patistan]

To: Ludwig Hazlitt Menger (ruler of Mckleigh)
From: Shaheer Shazib (PM of Patistan)

Hello Ludwig this is Shaheer the Prime minister of Patistan.Our nations have not known about each other since these world cup qualifiers.Well i am happy to say that your football team has caught my eye ,i am a very big football fan and seeing your nation at No.3 despite not being ranked in a way has inspired me.So today i am sending this telegram to you as a proposed deal between our two nations,"My nation Patistans head football coaches will train selected players of MCkleigh,the players shall be selected by Mckleigh football federation.In return selected players of Patistan football team shall be trained by coaches from Mckeligh,the player will be chosen by the Patistan football federation".I hope you accept this proposal,this proposal will lead to benefiting both of our nations and unlocking foreign relations between our nations.

Sincerely

Shaheer Shazib PM of Patistan.

[The Icemark]

...

[HopNation]

The Games

Ah, there we go we got a win after a three game drought. Well we expected to win this one anyway, but expectations don’t always turn out the way we like them to. We should really be 4-0-3 if you simply look at expectations and ranks. But we seemed to lay an egg on match day two and simply come away with a draw to a team we were expected to win. Again I guess this is why we play the games and don’t simply go on that rank thing. Anyway, the Hops really did play well in the final game of the first leg so we should talk about that a bit. The team came out firing and lit up Kaldtland early with Schytaing netting the matches’ first goal at just the three minute mark. The Hops scored again just four minutes later to go up 2-0 after just seven minutes of play, the second goal was scored by Droimpol. This game could have gotten ugly if the Hops would have continued their forward pressure, but they decided to change up their tactics a little and see if they could boost their possession skills. For the next forty minutes (45’+ 2’ stoppage) the team kept control of the ball for nearly 80% of the time, a number they have never hit before on the possession chart. At the break Coach Schmidt made some changes and used all of his allowed subs to replace the two defensive mids and one of the center backs. It seems he still wanted to score some more goals by leaving in his top forward and top midfielder, but is a two goal lead ever enough? Probably not. It seemed the changes we not good ones either as the Kaldtland side scored their first of two goals in the fifty first minute as Arcerton and Worfworf, the two new defensive mids, ran into each other trying to defend the same player. This allowed Kaldtland forwards to advance into the HopNation defensive third and score. But the Hops answered right back and on the ensuing kick-off took the ball down and Droimpol put in his second goal of the game. Kaldtland put up a good fight for the remainder of the game, but the Hops netted their fourth and final goal in the seventy fourth minute as Loostin scored off of a corner kick. The Hops seemed to relax a bit and gave up a late free kick just outside the box and the Kaldtland striker would not be denied as he curled the free kick around the near side of the wall and just inside the post to bring the final score to 4-2. Hopefully the HopNation National team will take this win into the next leg of the qualification stage and produce many more wins.

HopNation Match Ups

MD 1: vs The Fair Republic (5-1)	MD  8: @ The Fair Republic
MD 2: @ Theaoie (1-1)     		MD  9: vs Theaoie
MD 3: vs Seraphic Empire (3-0)          MD 10: @ Seraphic Empire
MD 4: @ Osarius (2-6)			MD 11: vs Osarius
MD 5: vs Super-Llamaland (1-2)	        MD 12: @ Super-Llamaland
MD 6: @ Sandwich Territories (1-3)  	MD 13: vs Sandwich Territories
MD 7: vs Kaldtland (4-2)		MD 14: @ Kaldtland
Win|Draw|Loss

The Expectations

Well, a surprise tie with Theaoie and Super-Llamaland seem to allow the group leaders, Osarius and Sandwich Territories, to pull ahead. Just a little though, it also allowed HopNation to pull a tad closer although still six points behind them. With a full legs results we’ve had to re-thing or re-evaluate the group a little. So here is a look at the current standings after seven match days.

Current Places:

1. Osarius
2. Sandwich Territories
3. Super-Llamaland
4. HopNation
5. The Fair Republic
6. Theaoie
7. Seraphic Empire
8. Kaldtland

Next we have our new predicted finishing positions. We feel Osarius will slid down a spot as the Sandwich Territories are currently only behind them due to their goals scored vs goals allowed statistic. For some reason we just don’t feel that Osarius will make it past the second leg games with only 1 or even 2 losses, they will finish with 10 wins 2 draws and 2 losses (32 points total). This will drop them to at least second in the group. We see the Sandwich Territories with at least 11 wins, then possibly a draw, or two losses (at least 33 points). Next we will find Super-Llamaland pulling away from HopNation but not by much. They will end with 9 wins, 3 draws, and 2 losses (30 points). In the groups fourth spot we will find our Hops and we think they will better their first leg performance by ending with 7 total wins, one more than the first leg. So look for them to finish with a 7 win, 2 draw, and 5 loss record (26 points). Next will come The Fair Republic who will do no better on wins in the second half but they will avoid at least one loss and make it a draw, so they should end at 6 wins, 1 draw, and 7 losses (19 points). In the sixth spot we’ll find Theaoie, who have played well at times but just not well enough. They will finish with the same second half record as the first, putting them at 4 wins, 4 draws, and 6 losses (16 points). Next will be Seraphic Empire who might pull out a tie, but will not win another game putting them at 1 win, 1 draw, and 12 losses (4 points). Then we have the last place team in the group, which will be Kaldtland. In the second half they will find a way to get one tie, but no wins ending them with a 0 win, 1 draw, and 13 loss record (1 point).

Predicted Finish:

1. Sandwich Territories
2. Osarius
3. Super-Llamaland
4. HopNation
5. The Fair Republic
6. Theaoie
7. Seraphic Empire
8. Kaldtland

So with that we await the second leg of qualifications and can’t wait to see what happens with the predicted finishing spots and total points for each team. Anything can happen and it often does, but we will leave the predicted finish unchanged. Until then Brew On Brew Well Hoptonians!

[Chiata]

Wartorn
Part 1

A continuation of The Secret War.

National Address

President Michael Johnson- As you know, today is my birthday. However, this day is not a joyous day, even for me. Instead of happiness, this day is cloaked in the darkness of war, the black hood of hatred, and the veil of evil. The few of you that stayed up late will probably know why this day is as it is. For those that do not know why, let me explain to you.

Two days ago, there was a horrendous event in Deala that swept the attention of everyone. In the incident, one hundred human beings died and hundreds more were wounded while protesting. However, something far worse happened the fallowing day.

On October 15th, 2095(ic time), The Emirates of Carialus declared war on The Federation of Deala. *long pause*

Deala, since its creation, has long been a strong ally to our fair nation. On the other side stands Carialus, strong, bold, and coragious. However, the Nation of Carialus, which separated from us in 2024, has not been friendly to us and we have not been to them. My staff and I have weighed both options considerably and have come to a conclusion.

We, the Holy Empire of Chiata, have decided to protect and support the sovereignty of Deala. We simply cannot cast away one of our closest and strongest allies. They protected us during an incident in the Tomian War. Now it is our turn to shoulder their nation so that they may live on.

However, as always, there will be consequences to our actions. Yesterday, in Carialus' international address, it was stated that any country that interfered in the upcoming war would be directly declaring war on Carialus. Therefore, we have taken a vote to the floor. The title is "Declaration of War on Carialus." I am here to tell you that this bill has passed through the council by a vote of 17 to 3.

The Holy Empire of Chiata is at war with The Emirates of Carialus. *another long pause*

I believe that war is never aa good thing. I believe that war drains the money of a nation, presses its economy, and causes unnecessary loss of life. However, there are points where war has become unavoidably. That point has been reached. The line of war and peace is no longer blurred. The line now cuts through clear and distinct. We can see that out three nations are not somewhere in the middle. We can now clearly see where our nations our placed. I can tell you, we are far above this line.


For years we have endured the little hits and potshots that Carialus has given us. Now it is our time to act. Now is not the time to turn the cheak. Now is the time to turn to the hand, the mind, and the legs. I call upon you today to protect the liberties and ideals of Deala from the injustice and oppression of Carialus. I call upon you, the common individual. The black or white. The male or female. I call upon you. I call upon you for an army of 300,000 volunteers.

As we near our nations centennial (2000-2100) I want you to ask yourself a question. What has our nation done in the past one hundred years? What has it done to spread our ideals and liberties. I do not think a very good answer would be that we bickered with another nation the hole time. I want to tell my children that we fought to uphold our ideals.

So go and spread the word of this address. And as always, "In Chiata We Trust."

[Barunia]

Kitty sat on the beach, watching the sun set over the turquoise sea. It was picture perfect, and if she was on holiday she would have found it beautiful. But she was working, and she saw the darker side of this island paradise. She'd finally found a lead that tomorrow would take her deep into the jungle on one of the large, remote islands. She'd been given the name of a man in a small village there, a man who she suspected was one of the middle men in the match-fixing scandal that would blow open the world of Barunian football.

Kitty knew she was being watched. Rodolphe, the man she was going to meet, would almost certainly have her under surveillance. She just had to make sure she didn't do anything that would blow her cover. She wondered if they'd searched her room already. Although this was Kitty's first real undercover assignment, she'd been in journalism long enough to know the game, and had made the precaution of placing her passport and recording equipment in the hotel's safe. Their was nothing in her room that would tell them that she was anything other than who she claimed to be.

That someone was Rebecca Marshall, a citizen of Barunia and PR secretary for Southern Bluebirds. Kitty's contact in the underworld has set up a meeting with Rodolphe, to talk about sponsorship for the club. Kitty expected that Rodolphe would understand it to mean that she wanted in. It certainly seemed he'd taken the bait. She'd been invited to meet Rodolphe on his villa. If Kitty played her cards right, she could potentially find out everything she needed to expose the criminals behind this conspiracy.

Kitty had bought a copy of the Barunian Gazette from a specialist newsagent. She flicked through to the sports section and smiled. "7-0-0" read the headline. A perfect score in the first half of qualifying. Kitty was pretty sure 8 straight wins in a row was also a record for the Barunians. Van der Venne was proving a good fit up front, with 9 goals so far. North, Estrella and Delgado were also pulling their weight. Marris and Ruskin were proving to be capable leaders, and it seemed certain the team would qualify, barring a terrible disaster in the second half. Kitty smiled, in spite of the danger she would face on the morrow. Today, things were looking good.

[Razul]

From: gwaren@shininge.com
To: alia365@shininge.com

The Waren family. Alia, I thought you should hear this, but I doubt the girls would reenact it for you so I wrote it down:

Genevieve: I'm bored. What should we do?

Natalie: We could go outside and play football.

Genevieve: Are you kidding? It's raining cats and pangolins out there.

Natalie: So?

Genevieve: I have an idea. We could make fake player cards.

Natalie: For who.

Genevieve: Ourselves . . . Or the players in the world cup.

Natalie: Why? None of them are any good.

Genevieve: You're just saying that because they lost their last game.

Natalie: And four others! My football team has a better record than that.

Genevieve: Yeah, because they're playing against world class teams, and you aren't.

Natalie: Fine. We'll make player cards. Mine will look like this: Player Name: Random Player from the team Player Height: I don't know Player Weight: I don't know that either How long have they been playing: You go look it up Regional Team: Ditto

Genevieve: Have you got a better idea.

Natalie: Yes

Genevieve: Let's hear it.

Natalie: We already did. The rain's stopped

Genevieve: Oh good. The national team isn't bad, though.

Natalie: Is too.

Genevieve: Is not.

Natalie: 's too.

Genevieve: 's not.

Natalie: Well . . . Maybe. There's some decent players. I get to be the goalie

Genevieve: NO FAIR!

Anyway. I miss you. I hope that your trip is going well.

Love
Geoff

[Schiavonia]

Because I'm really tired and my internet connection was down last night...

Kev: "I've run out of fingers!"

Jenny: "You do have two hands, you know."

Kev: "Ah, yes."

Jenny: "Unbelievable! Seven-nil to the Sloths! Who saw this coming!?!"

Kev: "They really aren't all that 'Grande', are they?"

Jenny: "I guess not. But I'm sure they'll have better days eventually. Still, one for Leau, and there's still a bit of time left. This must be some sort of record. Do we know what Schiavonia's biggest ever win was?"

Kev: "No."

Jenny: "Well, I guess that it was probably the seven-nil wins against McPsychoville in World Cup 29 qualifying and at J-Man2k7 during the qualifying for World Cup 34. That's compared to our biggest defeats, an eight-one friendly hammering against Cafundéu, which was our first game back after our first exile. Or five-nil at World Cup 26 against Spruitland, if we're talking competitive games."

Kev: "Wow! That's good knowledge!"

Jenny: "Thanks!"

Kev: "So is there no history lesson today?"

Jenny: "Just the one about record scores. Is that not enough for you? This is an historic day for Schiavonia."

Kev: "Fair point, it is."

Jenny: "And don't you know how long it took the transcriber to look that up?"

Kev: "The trans-who, now?"

Jenny: "Transcriber?"

Kev: "Who's that?"

Jenny: "Well, looking through the history books, Schiavonia used to have this thing called an 'RP Machine'. It used to transcribe events that had happened surrounding the Schiavonia National Football Team and send it off to the WCC and tournament hosts, in the odd belief that it would improve their chances of winning."

Kev: "Even by my usual ideas, that sounds a bit loopy."

Jenny: "I know. But then, the Sloths got to the Quarter Finals of World Cup 50 with a team of under-14s, so it was believed to work. Now, on the sly, Kenny Sanderson VI has a guy who transcribes everything we say and sends it off to the World Cup hosts."

Kev: "And how does it work?"

Jenny: "No idea. I guess referees look more favourably upon you or something. Anyway, since we've started that, we've tied our record win, so it must do us some good!"

Kev: "Crikey!"

Jenny: "The only thing is, the transcriber's computer has broken, so he will only be able to send this once it has been fixed. Which will probably be after the Furrelum match."

Kev: "Does that mean we have less chance of beating Furrelum?"

Jenny: "I believe so, though that could be a negligible difference. We shouldn't really be beating anyone, should we? Never mind seven-nil!"

Kev: "Too true!"

Jenny: "Also, the transcriber hasn't transcribed a lot tonight, because he has been busy."

Kev: "Busy? Doing what?"

Jenny: "Enjoying the game."

Kev: "Lazy sod."

Jenny: "Yes. He should try commentating for ninety minutes! Then he'll know work! Slacker..."

[McKleigh]

McKleighvians were shocked to see their nations team in 3rd place of group 23 at the half way point of qualifying. We anticipated a win by Patistan and to be tied with them in points but in fourth on goal diiferential. Perhaps Margaret is partial to gingers. Margaret sounds like a good name for a ginger to be honest. Maybe we are just that good! Ehhhh, I think we will credit Margaret to be safe!

Last nights victory came after a goal in the 37th minute by Wallace O'Ryan, the only by either team in the match. Our next match is against KPB 15 rank Equestrian States whom we fell to 2-1 to start the round. However this time they come to us for the match. Will Margaret grant us an upset? Here is the remaining schedule.
Apr 1 vs Equestrian States
Apr 2 @ Patistan
Apr 3 vs Zwangzug
Apr 4 @ Zwannswijik
Apr 5 vs Iturributa
Apr 6 @ Grandham Islands
Apr 7 vs Levivania

In other news it appears it is not just McKleighvians who are excited about our recent success.

To: Ludwig Hazlitt Menger (ruler of Mckleigh)
From: Shaheer Shazib (PM of Patistan)

Hello Ludwig this is Shaheer the Prime minister of Patistan.Our nations have not known about each other since these world cup qualifiers.Well i am happy to say that your football team has caught my eye ,i am a very big football fan and seeing your nation at No.3 despite not being ranked in a way has inspired me.So today i am sending this telegram to you as a proposed deal between our two nations,"My nation Patistans head football coaches will train selected players of MCkleigh,the players shall be selected by Mckleigh football federation.In return selected players of Patistan football team shall be trained by coaches from Mckeligh,the player will be chosen by the Patistan football federation".I hope you accept this proposal,this proposal will lead to benefiting both of our nations and unlocking foreign relations between our nations.

Sincerely

Shaheer Shazib PM of Patistan.

In reply Ludwig Hazlitt Menger wrote the following.

Dear Shaheer Shazib,
Please be aware that while I think this is a wonderful idea and would have my blessing, the ultimate decision lies in the hands of those that are on the teams management board. I will gladly forward this invitation to them.
regards,
L.H. Menger

The following was later released by the McKleighvian Soccer Management Board

Shaheer Shzib,
We would gladly welcome your invitation. Might I suggest we start with an exchange of some reserve players when our nations meet on April 2. Then between this World Cup and WC69 we can do an exchange of some starters. Our strength is defense and I see your nation's is offense. Thus I would like to start by bringing to you the following 4 players on Wednesday; #20 Willard Bruce age 20 striker(son of the team manager and World Cup 55 star William Bruce), #21 Daron McSands age 19 forward, #23 John McGeorge age 19 forward, and #27 Belkbacbac Luagaslouitu age 17 striker.
Thank you for this invitation,
M.S.M.B.

[Greater Watford]

Joe Davis-GWFA Head Office
The sun had barely risen, but I was already in my office. The situation looked bleak, we’d just lost 5-1 to Sicoutimont, and if we lost to Brenecia, it could spell the end of our hopes. We were imploding, it was worse than WC67. At least then there was no pressure on us to do well. I’d hoped to challenge for a play-off spot, but it seemed unlikely now.
I had the day’s news on my laptop screen. Everywhere was reporting the fall-out of the squad after the 5-1 defeat, and Gianpedro storming off in a rage. Well, there was that, and the inevitable comments about me resigning, Gianpedro resigning, retirement rumours, and Gregor Davis and the SLF. Seriously, why do the press insist on all the negative publicity?
Still, I supposed a few things we’re getting better. I’d received a handwritten, humbling apology from Mario. It was good to see that our captain had respect for others and his nation, and admitted his actions were wrong. At least some of the team were now working together, even if the healing process was slow.

Gianpedro Dominico-Pre-game
I walked into the players and staff entrance of the Hornet’s Nest. I knew this was our last stand halfway into the tournament. A loss today would probably mean it would be all over in terms of reaching the playoffs. This was a tough campaign for us, and my reaction at the end of the last game didn’t amuse anyone. The press seemed agitated for results, and the finger fell towards me.
I opened the door into the changing room, and saw the team sitting there. I readied myself for the speech. “Right,” I said boldly, “We’re not playing well, and we need a win. Brenecia are ranked ahead of us on paper, but that’s only a scrap of paper. Worthless on the pitch.” Several players looked up attentively. “We may not be at full strength, but don’t be put off”. I grabbed a whiteboard pen, and started scribbling over the dots on the board. “Now, from set pieces, I want the defence here, here and here” I said, gesturing with my thumb. “When attacking, look to draw out the defence, to create some space in the centre. If they don’t bite, cut back in. Finally, go out there, and show this nation what you can do.”
As I sat in the dugout, I heard the cheers of the crowd. There was, however, a vocal section of boos. This was disconcerting, and not the sign I wanted to see. I grabbed the nearest water bottle, and took a mouthful of drink. I had a bitter taste in my mouth, and if this game went wrong, I’d reconsider by position as manager as soon as possible.

Mario Mannetti-Executive Boxes, Hornet’s Nest.
“Bet you wish you were out there?” said a feminine voice, cheekily. I looked across at Rose, who had her cheery smile on her face. Rose Galley, 21 was my guest, so to speak. Or girlfriend, if you wanted to call it that. She sat, twiddling her ginger hair, around her fingers. She was a well-known model, but lesser known fashion designer.
“Of course. But you know, stuff happens.” I said, lazily in response.
“So exactly what did you do?” Rose asked
“Just hacked someone who upset me” I responded, smiling.
“Well that’s a bit bad of you” Rose responded in mock criticism. I really liked Rose. She didn’t take herself seriously, which surprised me. She wasn’t shallow, and was really fun to be around. Nevertheless, the tabloids lapped up the story of me and her. I sat opposite her at the moment, on the dining table, but was regularly checking the game. It was a dull 0-0 draw at the moment. Certainly, Rose was more interesting.
“So tell me Mario, how did you get into football?” she asked.
“I played in the Watford Youth League, and they signed me up at 16. Made my first team debut at 17, became captain at just 21, and now I’m captain of the national side.” I responded, remembering my childhood football days.
“Awesome!” she replied.
“You like football Rose?” I asked
“Nah, well not until I met you. Besides I’m always busy in the fashion world. It’s dog eat dog out there.” She cheerily replied.
“Yeah, I’ve got into a scrap on the pitch recently, so I know what’s it’s like”. I said
“Trust me, you’ve not seen diva tantrums until a fashion blog writes some negative reviews, or people start stealing ideas. I reckon you’d be scared of some of those divas”. Rose responded, smiling.
Just then, a huge cheer went up. Greater Watford had scored, and it was Ignacio Peréz, the surprise goalscorer. 1-0 up, I could finally relax a little, and enjoy the game I was watching, with my new friend.

[Kericia]

The buzzsaw that is the Kericia Seagulls

We’ve been here before, haven’t we? Halfway through the World Cup qualifying campaign, Kericia sit in second place to Turori. Just four years ago, the Seagulls were in second place, but mired in a four-way deadlock. The group leaders then? None other than those Eels from Atlantian Oceania. It’s no surprise that Turori are once again dominating the group, but the Kericians are hoping the second half isn’t a repeat of their last attempt.

Dreams of qualifying for World Cup 67 were dashed after a disastrous second half, with the team faltering late mostly to other mid-table teams. This time around, Kericia has distanced themselves from the mid-table scrap by defeating rival Svengarda 2-0 and opening up impressive scorelines against lower-ranked opponents. The 5-0 and 6-1 victories over Taijan and Arbeitsgemeinschaft Alpenlander, respectively, have shockingly given the Kericians the best goal difference in Group 16. Finishing in the top three only guarantees a playoff place, which probably works to the Kericians’ advantage. If they can survive the group stage, a favorable draw and a two-legged tie could be all that’s necessary for a trip to Legalese or the Free Republics.

The only blemish in the results list so far is the 1-0 away defeat to the group leaders, Turori. The result is particularly painful as it means Kericia have suffered three one-goal defeats to the Eels in the past two World Cup qualifying attempts. The Eels are traditionally a defensive-minded team, so look for another close match when they make the visit to the Estadio Zapata. Losing to such a highly touted team is nothing to be ashamed of, but surely a Seagulls win would give them the confidence to finally make that march into the World Cup proper.

[The greater Vakolicci Haven]

((ooc: After getting a bit of info from Gregoryisgodistan, and not hearing about any military movements within the last RL day, prepare for an international incidend. Braught to you GVH-style.))

IC:

The well-controlled lives of the slaves and near-slaves of Gregoryisgodistan was going on as unhappily as normal in the Capital District. Air martial Gustaf Laurecz surveyed the clinical orderlyness of the 'city' and sighed: places like this should never exist.

As his aircraft moved over, radio chatter herralded the arrival of the Gregoryisgodistan air force. ((ooc: Provide an orbat next time please.) The Vakolicci fighter wings quickly engaged the enemy craft, as the bombers proceeded to drop their loads on the terrified people of Gregoryisgodistan, aiming nominally for government buildings and the buildings that looked to be the homes of the upper class in this despotic nation, before rising quickly and speeding out across the ocean, making for a small port on the outskirts of Vakolicci Tyrrhenia.

((ooc: State what you want for casualties.))

[Gregoryisgodistan]

Lord Almighty Gregory's Speech to the People

"Earlier today, the air force of The Greater Vakolicci Haven commenced with bombing our great nation. Approximately 50 bombs were dropped, killing 67 citizens and wounding 148. I must condemn this action by our enemy. Fortunately our air force is currently in the process of dropping 150 solar-powered bombs on that wicked nation. These bombs have the strength of nuclear weapons (OOC: No they don't) and therefore 150 nuclear bombs will be easily enough to annihilate that awful nation. In fact, the only area of that nation I will spare is the soccer stadium, so our team can beat the Greater Vakolicci Heathens tomorrow night in World Cup Qualifying.

"In fact, I have just received word from our pilots that they have dropped the 150 solar-powered bombs on The Greater Vakolicci Haven and killed 500 million wicked heathen citizens. There are not enough left to continue the threat. We are safe. The heathens are gone. You can rejoice now. We have destroyed most of that nation. (OOC: This is all propaganda, but we really did drop the bombs. As mentioned earlier, the only way to get killed is to get hit in the head by a falling fragment, which would kill you instantly. Feel free to RP how many people got killed by these.) Now, enjoy this video of the wicked heathens getting bombed to death."

On a projector screen in the background, heavily edited video showing bombs exploding over various cities in The Greater Vakolicci Haven is played with an instrumental version of "We are the World" airing in the background. It shows Vakoliccis running in terror before being blown to bits or vaporizing. Then, it shows a gaping hole where most of the nation used to be, and zooms in on the soccer stadium where the Vakolicci team (OOC: actually actors) are cowering in terror of Lord Almighty Gregory.

"Thank you. As you can see, that horrible nation has been destroyed. Maybe now, other nations will respect the awesome power of the Lord. For I am the Lord, the God of the Multiverse, who destroyed 500 million heathens in The Greater Vakolicci Haven and millions of other heathens in Saintland and Free Republics (OOC: more propaganda. One person died in Saintland and five in Free Republics, all from falling bomb fragments.) I also am responsible for the assassination of the wicked King Paulus of Saintland. (OOC: This is not true. We staged a fake assassination of King Paulus and claimed he was replaced by his twin brother who was also named Paulus in an attempt to deny the king was dead. He was assassinated for real shortly thereafter.) Furthermore, I orchestrated the assassination of the wicked Sister Maria Polus of Saintland after she attempted to assassinate me. She should have known I am immortal, but she did not, and for that and her assassination sins she needed to die. (OOC: She is very much alive. This is more propaganda.)

"In the event that the depeted Vakolicci military attempts any more bombings, I will drop 1,000 solar-powered bombs on that nation per day until the bombing ceases. Pretty soon that entire wicked nation will be destroyed. Death to the Vakolicci! Death to the Sanctii! Death to Free Republics! Death to San Jose Guayabal! Death to Alianza Albos! Death to Costa Luna! Death to Middleton Valley! Death to Hicana! Death to all our enemies! Let us celebrate the blood of the Vakoliccis who were killed today. Me Bless this glorious nation. Good night!"

[Apox]

Forged in Fire - Part Seven

Sparks of Revolution
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Part Five
Part Six

Forged in Fire
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Part Five
Part Six

Jeff was absolutely furious. There was no way he was ever letting Joe back in after his stupid, idiotic violence. He had just come off the phone after getting an earful from John Barnes in Dwile about how this could potentially fuck everything up. He had half a mind to go and hand Joe in himself, if it wasn’t for all the shit he’d get himself in if he did so.

In a moment of rage, he picked his phone up and texted the alias under which Joe was stored, Kelly Bwothaere. It read:

“You’d better start explaining your actions or you’re OUT. Entire mission potentially at risk.” He threw his phone against the wall and kicked over a table, just for good measure. Why couldn’t he have some patience?

However, Joe’s plan had clearly worked. This would undoubtedly be traced back to the ONP, and therefore they either had to take a risk now and attempt an uprising, or have the entire mission fail. He and John had grudgingly agreed that the former was probably the better option, and therefore he’d had no choice but to text all the cell leaders with the code words for the activation of the mission. “Let the Phoenix rise.”

Indeed, and from the ashes of servitude under a nation not truly theirs, a strong, independent Olfa would arise.

***

Jack Greybold and Annabel Harwood sat in the situation room, again for the second time in a week, alone. Things were looking grave in the South, and Jack suspected he knew who was behind it.

“Any reports on the casualties?” he asked Annabel, hoping the answer was good.

“Any reports are garbled, but local hospitals have reported at least 4 dead and 32 wounded. Still people coming in though.”

“I just don’t get it,” started Jack, “Why would someone bomb the high street of Urbanista? I’m not seeing any motives. I’m guessing its something to do with the Old Guard refugees coming in, but they don’t have anything to do with the Urbanista high street.” He continued to look puzzled, but Annabel was quick with an answer,

“Maybe this is bigger than a random attack? The ONP have been pretty active recently.” Before Jack could reply, the glass door slid open, and the tall, handsome figure of John Barnes stepped inside. John was serving as a Junior Minister to Annabel, and was regarded as a good young prospect in Apoxian politics, like Annabel and Jack, going back 2 and 5 years respectively.

“Good afternoon John,” said Annabel, “Please have a seat.” Jack flashed her a looked as John plonked himself down, but she ignored it. Jack knew she trusted him a great deal, but he had misgiving about his character.

“Bloody awful, this attack, eh?” John said, “Whole of Esportiva’s going to shit at this rate.” Jack flashed another look, still ignored.

“We think it might be a co-ordinated attack John,” said Annabel, turning to face him. Jack saw a momentary look of panic on John’s face, before that faded. Only momentary, but enough to tell him that this man couldn’t be trusted. He prayed that Annabel didn’t give anything important away.

“If it’s the ONP, we’ll need to act quickly. They’ve been unusually quiet recently.” No such luck then, thought Jack bitterly. Oh well, things were desperate enough, they’d still have enough manpower to crush the ONP in it’s tracks.

“We should have all of the targets on the ONP watchlist immediately apprehended, we need to break this down at the top. Do you agree, Jack?” she said, turning back to him. He smiled, weakly, before nodding slowly, face trained on John sat next to Annabel. No expression at all. Oh, he was good. They continued to talk for a little while, before Annabel said she had to dash off. Luckily John left the room first, and before she could leave, Jack slid the door shut.

“We can’t trust him.” Annabel looked shocked, betrayed even.

“What?! Why ever not?” Jack sighed, wondering how she hadn’t noticed.

“Didn’t you see? When you implied that we thought it wasn’t an isolated attack, he looked panicked. Only for a second, but that’s enough.” Annabel was having none of it,

“A natural reaction to the shock of hearing that we are under attack from within. I don’t think there was anything malicious behind it.” Jack couldn’t contain himself, leaning in slightly.

“Ok, ok. I won’t go after him… for now. But you can’t reveal anything of importance regarding the ONP to him. Feed him false intel, anything, just not the truth. I need your word on this, otherwise neither of us are leaving this room.” Annabel rolled her eyes, sighed before relenting.

“Fine I won’t tell anyone. Now I really have to go.” Jack stood aside, the worry leaving his face. From here on in, it was all damage limitation.

Lojal 0-2 Apox 5' Etezadi, 24' Zozula
Our final qualifying match of the first half was against minnows Lojal, allowing Fjelden to bring some of the less experienced players into the side. Apox were quick to get ahead, Solomon Etezadi scoring after only 5 minutes of play, off a Marcus Redwood corner kick. Apox continued to have dominance, with Martin Roskorwell repeated coming close, before Adnan Zozula, on debut, scored of a rebounded shot originally struck by Roskorwell to put the game largely out of reach. Lojal contracted into all out defense mode after that, and Apox, sitting on a good positive GD were largely happy to let them stay defensive, with John Lockwood being tested quite near the end of the match, although the lofted shot from Jermain Guntarr wasn't hard to block. One of the easier games he'll have I expect.

[Sargossa]

They’d seen him irritated. They’d seen him annoyed. They’d seen him irked, haggled, bothered, aggravated, exasperated, peeved and vexed. But that was the first time any of the Sargossan president’s cadre of aides and advisors had ever seen Gregorio Emparán truly angry.

And it happened in the blink of an eye during one of his interminable briefings. One moment El Presidenté was leaning against his desk, a cup of black coffee cradled in his hands. The next a certain extract from a recent edition of the Torgos Tribune became the focus and suddenly, in a whirl of furious motion, the coffee cup exploded against the wall. Both a Minister of the Republic and a senior army general were showered in hot liquid as the inner circle starred aghast at their leader.

He didn’t even look at them, his eyes instead boring into the wet smear that now adorned the wall while his right hand clenched and unclenched. The stunned silence seemed to stretch on into eternity before he finally muttered just two words.

“Get out.”

No one needed to be asked twice.

[Armakistan]

Armakistan not good enough in 8 goal thriller

Armakistan couldn't keep up their good run of form as they gave up 5 goals in their first home loss. While they did reply with 3 goals of their own it was a poor defensive display which could lead to some changes being made. The first goal came from the visiting side as they found the net through Sylvius Johnson. His turn and shoot was too quick for Mickleson. There second goal came from top scorer Jacques Bressler as he headed in unmarked after Nicholas Ivanov evaded his marker to whip in a cross.

Armakistan managed to pull a goal back before half time as Nick Kelly powered a low shot past the keeper after a 23 pass move which involved everyone in the team. Martin Bucklebury grabbed the assist. The 3rd Lymantatian goal came just after the break as defender Jacques Volante rose highest from a corner taken by Charles Garcia and only minutes later great run by Jacques Bressler ended in his 2nd goal and his teams 4th. In wasn't until the 75th minute when the next goal came and this time it was Armakistan through James Darling as a lovely through ball from Freddy Bell meant he was left with just one defender to beat. He did with great skill and slotted the ball past the keeper to make it 2-4.

The game ending goal came in the 82nd minute as Jacques Bressler grabbed his hat trick. Henry Potters brought down Sylvius Johnson for a freekick and earned himself a yellow card. Bressler struck the freekick hard and it evaded everyone and ended up in the back of the net. Armakistan grabbed a late consolation again through Darling and he weaved his way through tackles before quick one-two with Bucklebury and fierce strike across goal which nestled in the back of the net. The whistle went so after and Armakistan will be looking to get back to winning ways after the short mid-qualifying break if they are to make a push for the playoffs.

[Zenic]

The only sound in the room was of the two men drinking. Emperor Prof. Proctor and national team manager Sanders were sitting in the Emperor’s office as they shared a bottle of whiskey in the wee hours of the night. Both of them tended to sleep later than most and decided to share each other’s company, chatting about the future of both the empire and association football.

“May I say this, Joseph: Fantastic job, not only in the latest match against Swyftlandre but the entire existence of this team. Honestly, fourth place halfway through our first qualifying attempt? Simply amazing. I do not believe anyone else could have done a better job,” Proctor said, praising the results Sanders had delivered so far. Sanders smiled, finding it almost dream-like that the Emperor was congratulating him. “Thank you, Emperor. It truly does mean much to me that you’re pleased. However, we still another half of qualifying to go and we need to keeping winning the easy games and start getting some more upsets.”

“You never do stop thinking about the sport, do you? You literally just finished the game against Swyflandre as well as the friendly against Darmen and you’re already thinking about the next game.” The Emperor knew he had found the right man for the job, with this only confirming it. Regarding the matches, the matchday 7 match versus Swyftlandre, it was a huge win for Zenic as it proved they could beaten a team with experience and helped them keep up with the top three teams in group 6. It was an even battle of teams as they literally exchanged goals: one for Kun-Woo, one for them, one for Ayaode, another one for them and finally one for Daniel O. Unfortunately, the Darmen friendly wasn’t as successful as they lost 3-0.

Sanders finished his drink before placing the glass down on the Emperor’s desk. “I have no other choice: we have the rematch against Hutt River here in New Citium tonight….or should I say later today,” as he looked as his watch. “We need a win against them if we truly want a chance to make it to the World Cup. A loss would require a serious meltdown from their national team for the rest of the second half of qualifying and trust me, that’s something that is less likely to happen than an upset. We have the talent to win: we just need to utilize it.”

The Emperor chugged his drink, looking out the window as he finished. “I know. But we’ll survive this qualifying…….hopefully.”

[Horusland]

World Cup 68
Copa Sekai Rokzais shi Octo
Matchdays One through Seven
Kei Tai Un Kaauta Hachi
(OOC: Catch up on World Cup. Catch up on one year of school. Catch up. ugh)

The first half of qualification has passed, and our national team has done fairly well, With a total of thirteen points, the Horuslandian Wolves have won four games, lost two and tied one, being defeated only by higher-ranked nations, The Holy Empire and Paradystopia. Until now, the qualifying scores have kept our adversaries in the same order, with us in third place.

The first day matched us against the Ice Birds of Torisakia. Though very quiet in the beginning, the game ended with a 3-1 win.
The opening goal was scored by our best striker, Altaan Narek, in the 43rd minute. It was closely followed by a goal from Torisakian attacker Johnny Kelso. Though the Ice Birds managed to tie the score, this wouldn't last long, with two goals being scored by Kaoru Hamasaki in the 75th and 89th minutes.
Points: 3 | Ranking: 4th.

Our second matchday went well, with another win against 336th ranked Ditka. In this game, the only goal was made by Doruk Aslan in the 34th minute. Meanwhile, The Holy Empire managed to defeat Paradystopia 2-0, keeping us in second place in our group.
Points: 6 | Ranking: 2nd.

Matchday three... Our first loss, against the Holy Empire. Though they are a better team than us, we somehow managed to score two goals (Hamasaki, Narek) in the 41st and 67th minutes. Not much is known about the scorers of the Empire, whose names we couldn't find out.
Points: 6 | Ranking: 4th.

Our next match was against Paradystopia. Though the Wolves managed to last against the higher-ranked team throughout the first half, the only goal of the match was scored by Luke Benjamin, right before the end of the second half.
Points: 6 | Ranking: 5th.

Once again, the Horuslandian team's aggressive playing shows... against an unranked team. Marking seven goals, the Wolves launched their goal difference into positive numbers. Out of the seven goals, most were marked during the first half of the game, by Altaan Narek. Both Altaan and Kaoru Hamasaki managed to score three goals, with Iorek Haalinen marking another.
With the two major games done, the game against Serebro shows that there's only up from here (at least, until the second half of qualifying).
Points: 9 | Ranking: 3rd.

On matchday six, we met Kalumba, ranked 90th, and with a qualifying performance similar to ours. The match ended 1-0, with the only goal being made by Santtu Virtanen in the late second half. With three more points, HorusLand doesn't lose ground, remaining in third place.
Points: 12 | Ranking: 3rd.

Yesterday's match was a draw with Nassau-Hessen. Though starting in the lead with a 11th minute goal from Narek and a 54th minute goal from Aslan, the opponents quickly managed to bring the score to a tie.
Points: 13 | Ranking: 3rd.

Tomorrow, we'll face Torisakia again. A win is predicted for this game. Though remaining in third place seems easy to do, it would take a miracle to go higher.

Group 3                          Pld    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts 
1 The Holy Empire                    7    7   0   0    22    4  +18    21
2 Paradystopia                       7    5   1   1    14    5   +9    16
3 HorusLand                          7    4   1   2    16    9   +7    13
4 Kalumba                            7    3   1   3    17   12   +5    10
5 Nassau-Hessen                      7    3   1   3     9   11   −2    10
6 Torisakia                          7    2   2   3     7   13   −6     8
7 Ditka                              7    1   0   6     8   22  −14     3
8 Serebro                            7    0   0   7     2   19  −17     0

[Super-Llamaland]

Complete Randomosity: The End

The two ships collided, shattering windows in billions of glass shards, gleaming like little stars as they caught the bright starlight and floated in zero-gravity through the air. One unlucky shard landed on the solar-powered battery pack on the higher-up police ship, piercing into its cold paneled heart. There was a yell. The world would never find out who yelled. As the spaceship began to fall onto the ship Llama, Hicana, SJG, Jeck, Mark, Jenni, Gerald, and Gerald were all on, there was another piercing scream, a desolate sob that implied that whoever had screamed knew they were doomed. That person was pretty perceptive.

There was a sickening crunch as the spaceship's hyper-strong, emergency-powered gravity makers flicked on and off. Gravity echoed throughout space, sending everything towards the center of it. Planets and stars began to fly at the center of the galaxy, which was in fact a black hole in every dimension. The gravity surged through a trans-dimensional wormhole and flashed into every dimension. In every world, every galaxy, every deepest, darkest corner of the multiverse, the same thing began to happen.

At the controls, Jeck and Llama were thrown through the window, screaming as they quietly asphyxiated in the total vacuum of space, flinging towards the center of the universe, their bodies pulverized by dust and debris and burnt by the heat of a million stars. SJG made a desperate grab at the Improbability Drive that had improbably appeared in the corner, but he fell into a wormhole and was incinerated in a pyramid of super-heated plasma. At least he died quickly.

Hicana, Mark, Jenni, Gerald, and Gerald stayed on the leaderless ship, which haphazardly crashed into a black hole, came out the other end, and was devoured by a giant space bear. The bear's digestive juices melted through the metal, and the five drowned in acid and were converted into nutrients for the giant space bear.

Across the multiverse, everybody screamed as they were dragged into a black hole, which contracted into a singularity in every dimension. The singularities fell through a intricate system of wormholes devised by a bored graduate student twenty-nine years earlier and contracted into a single singularity, which evaporated shortly afterwards.

Everyone was dead. Everyone in the multiverse. The process took forty-two minutes.

April Fool's!

[The greater Vakolicci Haven]

Caldonaris, Celeria, The Greater Vakolicci haven
Iros, Capital province, The Greater Vakolicci Haven

"Have you written that message yet?" Miralim Tardenic said, nudging Blacksen who shuffled himself along the white bench, allowing the older man to sit down.
The 2 Vakolicci wingers surveyed the room where they were currently eating, a rather small and unatractive restaurant on the outskirts of Caldonaris, a large, yet similarly unatractive city around 90 miles from Athens, seat of the Gordavris clan in Celeria.
"No," Blacksen replied, fishing out his tablet from the large rucksack he was carrying. "We're still doing at Caldonhem, aren't we?"
"Caldonhem sounds good," was Tardenic's response.

Blacksen shrugged. It was just the ridiculous way the Vakolicci decided to operate that whatever happened, the opposition team could quite possibly not know where in a particular province they would be playing until the day before. Anywhere else, the football association would be bombarded with questions: but not in the nation where you could always guarantee a sellout.
"Well it's in Celeria," Blacksen commented. "Definitely in Celeria. Force Arena...we've already done their, Celerian Slavya doesn't really have any big stadiums no offense, the Royal Club in Turin don't want any part in this whole competition, so that leaves Meldento and Caldonhem as the 2 largest stadiums possible."
Miralim thought of Maldento, with its enormous free-flowing stands, and the sheer amount of infrastructure, bars, restaurants and hotels, that surrounded it. It could seat 219,000.
Caldonhem, on the other hand, was falling down. Eastern Fire, despite their wealth, seemed not to regard their aling stadium as a major priority. If such rioting happened as happened in the Svengarda match, Caldonhem might struggle to stand up.
"Maldento," Miralim said.
"Maldento," Blacksen agreed. "Do you think the same thing about Caldonaris architecture as I do?"
Tardenic laughed, before realising the whole bar was staring at the 2 disguised men with a look of hatred.
"It's pretty bad," he said slowly before removing the fake beard in unisen with his friend, wiping the strange makeup off his face, taking off the greatcoat he was wearing despite the Celari summer heat and sighing.
"Gentlemen!" Blacksen roared. "You've just lost your world cup qualifying game. Sort your stadium out."

With that, the young Prince and his companion were gone.

v-net
Origin: Blacksen Domination <Blacksen_121@domintech.cel>
Recipient: Gregoryisgodistan national football team
Subject: a little change of plans

Hi,
Unfortunately, due to infrastructure problems around Caldonhem, where we had enitially planned to host you, we've had to change locations.
Meldento, our new choice, is located 1100 miles from Caldonhem.

Naturally, if you and your supporters have already arrived, or are in transit to Caldonhem, I can arrange for aircraft to pick you up and transport you safely to the propper destination.
Please be aware that I have no plans personally for Havensport's arrest warrant to be carried out against your people, however I cannot speak for our supporters, and the local population of Maldento-zeri, the city in which our new stadium is situated.

Upon your entry in Meldento-Zeri, myself and the rest of the Vakolicci national football team will, naturally, be their to greet you at the airport. Transport, accomedation, food and drink will be provided free of charge.
As you will see in the Haven, we pride ourselves for our rich and storied culture. Thus, it is both fortunate and unfortunate for you that myself and a rock band of which I am a member will be performing a set at the 5-hour 'Freedom calling' concert, an anual event by the 3 best-selling Celari bands to raise money to help change the tide of governments in the least free of our foreign neighbours.
I hope you understand this noble cause, and so will appreciate the Premier Box seats I have purchased for your team prior to the kickoff out of my personal accounts. Of course, food and drink will be provided free of charge.

Hoping this letter finds yourself and your clan prosperous, and in good health and fortune,
Blacksen Domination,
Crown Prince of the autonomous Kingdom of Celeria, The Greater Vakolicci Haven.

He clicked send, and prepared for the Gregoryisgodistani's reception.

In Iros, however, a somewhat sterner assembly had met in the Pallascez Goranduern, residence of the President of the Greater Vakolicci Haven, Ronan W. O'clane.
He sat at the head of a long, polished wood council table, one side filled with his top political advisers, the other side with his foreign and military advisers. What the group had decided, despite their mixed origins, would shape the course of Vakolicci and Gregoryisgodistani history forever.

With a lift of the receiver, he began to dial the number that was apparently meant to direct him to the man who claimed to be a God amongst Man, the selftitled 'Lord Almighty' Gregory himself.

[Svengarda]

"Not cool" hissed Eremeni into his back-pack, and he glanced up to make sure he was unseen. He met the gaze of another boy on the bus, and smiled sheepishly, semi raising his hands in unknown self-defence.

He re-zipped the bag and shoved the bag under the seat, before gazing out of the window at the low-level, snow covered landscape. It was gonna be a long day. When they arrived at the school, Eremeni took a quick detour to the bathroom before going to class. He locked himself inside a toilet cubicle and unzipped his bag once again, discarding it's contents onto the grubby floor of the space. The yellow rubber duck landed, unperturbed, on top of the pile of assorted books, clothes and stationary.

Eremeni hurriedly picked up the duck and stared angrily into it's plastic bead eyes. It stared rather nonchalantly back at him, blinking twice.

"Who" he spat, exasperated "the f*** are you?! Where the f*** did you come from?"

The duck seemed to pause for a second, before offering it's response.

"Dunno mate, just, er, came alive this morning. That's about it...oh, Kom's the name. I think, it's written in plastic on by butt. Check"

"What, no, I'm not going to check your butt."

"Go on, it's only plastic...eugh..."

Eremeni turned the duck around and peered at the small black writing on the duck's back region. There, in small writing, beneath some washing and product mumbo-jumbo, was Kom.

"That's the company that made you" Eremeni said as the idea clicked in his head "Kom, they're a plastics company from Helsingborgs. I didn't know they made toys, but hey..."

Eremeni was about to continue when he heard the door of the bathroom open, followed by two voices.

"S***" he murmured to himself, before stuffing the duck, followed by the rest of the contents of his backpack. He unlocked the door of the bathroom and offered a friendly nod to the two others in the bathroom. They nodded back. He hurried out of the bathroom and back out along the corridor, before sliding into his classroom where people were still milling about before the start of the day. He went to his locker, which was conveniently placed in the bottom left of the stack of lockers, and he was able to cover himself as he removed the duck, covered by a jumper, into his locker.

It was going to be a long day.