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Inaugural CAFA Cup: RP/Scores Thread

A battle ground for the sportsmen and women of nations worldwide. [In character]

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Avorago
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 13
Founded: Jul 31, 2018
Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Avorago » Fri Jul 16, 2021 3:16 pm

FIVE USES OF AVORAGO TOAST


1. Eat it (unless you’re a Vdaran)
2. Try to eat it and watch it explode in your face (applies to Vdarans and Vdarans only pretty much)
3. As camouflage. As much as you might want to taste the delicious, juicy mixture of dirt, trees, sand and bread that makes up Avorago toast, it can really be useful as a form of camouflage. As long as no one asks why the plants and trees are hanging sideways while you stand up, then you should be fine. However, when lying on the ground in the middle of a bushland, Avorago toast has quite literally got you covered!
4. For warmth. Whenever you are covered with Avorago toast, the compactness of the bread, sand, dirt, trees and whatever else you find on Avorago actually makes you feel like you’re putting a really bloody warm jumper on. At times, it can be a bit too warm, but who cares about that.
5. As a bed. First of all, make sure that the toast is really well mashed up so it’s not too uncomfortable, then turn the bread over onto its back. From here, it shouldn’t be too much of a climb, depending on the thickness and size of the bread, to get to the top. And because bread is actually really comfortable to sleep on, you will find yourself dozing off within minutes.

AVORAGO - 5
Onwuamaeze 15’, 56’
Idris 35’
Ibeamaka 81’
Chukwunenye 90+2’

VDARA - 4
Lazelis 18’
Stamatelis 43’, 49’
Frangoglou 90+5’

AVORAGO - 5
Chiemela 35’
Ginikanwa 50’
Ibeamaka 72’
Odinakachukwu 84’
Onuwuamaeze 88’

INDEPENDENT ATHLETES FROM QUEBEC - 3
Chewbacca 42’, 69’
Woodcarver 62’


Word Count: 281

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Saltstead
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 150
Founded: Jun 12, 2018
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Saltstead » Fri Jul 16, 2021 3:33 pm

Saltstead v Ko-oren in numbers
2:
senior international trophies won by Ko-oren;

4: previous regional championship knockout matches contested by Saltstead;

0: previous regional championship knockout matches won by Saltstead;

9: points collected by both Saltstead and Ko-oren in the group stage;

11: goals scored by Saltstead in the group stage;

0: goals conceded by Ko-oren in the group stage;

1: coin toss necessary to separate the two teams;

∞: “k0–0ren” jokes in the lead up to the match;

45,328: seats sold out at Shoreline Park in Spetz-Tessah;

4,636,971: Saltsteaders watching the match from home;

4: yellow cards shown to Saltsteaders;

2: Saltsteadish players (Pijr Josefssen and Victoria Rothöüf) suspended for the next round;

1: Saltsteader lucky to get off without a red card;

22: well-behaved Ko-orenite players;

60: per cent possession by Saltstead in the match;

7: shots saved by Larut Theshendan;

38: minutes before Constantijn van Bleck opened scoring for Saltstead;

79: minutes before Zacharias van den Slåp unexpectedly doubled Saltstead’s lead from long range;

5: shots saved by Robert-Jan van Daal;

1: penalty saved by the Saltsteadish number one;

198: minutes since Saltstead last conceded a goal;

1: Ko-orenite team understandably disappointed by the result;

1: Saltsteadish team left in absolute disbelief by it;

1: team from Group E left standing;

1: Pyazhnaya to face in the quarterfinals;

1: spot in the semifinals on the line.

The Royal Saltsteadish Football Association


Pyazhnaya : Saltstead
Starting XI: Van Daal; Aurelius, Van Tilborg, Van Middelkamp, De Vriħt; Aħterop, Van Bleck, Ratmaker, Joxepħssen; Van den Slåp; Haråudssen
Substitute bench: Äsħes, Kåler; Åudenberg, Handel; Sħåul, Felicianus, Le Duc, Pascal; Åubreħtssen, Withöüf

TLA: SAL(T)
iTLD: .zs
Demonym: Saltsteader
Adjectival: Saltsteadish
This nation does not necessarily reflect my actual political views
Discontinue use if rash develops
Don’t ⬋ play ⬋ with ⬋ fire
Qusmo - 06/08/2019

Maybe the real World Cup title was the friends we made along the way.
This space intentionally left
We are and shall be
Saltstead
Nothing more, nothing less

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Pyazhnaya
Secretary
 
Posts: 28
Founded: Apr 22, 2021
Democratic Socialists

Postby Pyazhnaya » Fri Jul 16, 2021 3:54 pm

***BREAKING NEWS***
In a surprise move several Pyazhnayan football clubs have placed several bids on high profile players from the South Newlandian Soccer League that has announced a suspension of operations for the next season. This is complete terra incognita for domestic clubs, who have just emerged from a long international isolation and is seen by some as a good sign for Pyazhnayan football becoming a complete part of the international football society, while others see it as a dangerous precedent of losing national identity, seeing that several Pyazhnayan players have moved abroad in this current transfer window, which is set to close within the next 24 hours.

Two Sylestonean players have been confirmed as first ever foreign signings into the Pyazhnaya Pervaya Liga, 23-year-old left midfielder Cayden Holmes, who is making the switch from Elephant Valley FC to FK Armaskoye and 28-year-old Joseph Tasserton, who is leaving Kinjestad Soccer in favour of Prizrachnaya Brigada Cherniy Zamok, second and fifth in the last season.

A representative of Prizrachnaya Brigada Cherniy Zamok is cited as "excited for this opportunity and a clear sign to the rest of the league that the Ghost Brigade is going to be challenging for the title next season." As mentioned, several other of the top teams also have outstanding bids for a variety of players from Audioslavia, Zwangzug, Nephara, Kohnhead, South Newlandia, TJUN-ia and Ko-oren, which could result in an interesting constellation for next season.

Several of the lower table clubs have announced their displeasure at this move, as they are afraid that the gap between the top and lower clubs is going to considerably widen, even though others are pointing out that this will open opportunities for them to sign higher level local talent to compensate.
Anaia puppet of Tikariot

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Osarius
Senator
 
Posts: 3977
Founded: Mar 21, 2006
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Osarius » Fri Jul 16, 2021 5:07 pm

The win over Savigliane had aged Odell, even more than the tense win over Vdara. He arrived for the press conference ahead of the Aut-Ves-Nat match with noticeably more silver-grey hairs scattered throughout his beard, and tufts of it at his temples. His face a little sunken, and worn. He was not relishing the next match.

"Odell, would you say your side has the defensive quality to keep Aut-Ves-Nat at bay? They scored six in their last outing, and twenty-one in total from six games. Your side have conceded three goals per game on average this tournament." A reporter asked. He didn't recognise her.

With a sigh, Odell shook his head slightly and muttered to himself, "always with these questions." He looked up and smiled thinly. "Well, it's not really about keeping them at bay is it?" He paused, but not long enough to allow a response. "We just have to score more than they do." He shrugged. There was a clamour in response to this answer, and a familiar face stood out from the crowd. Gianni Facelli. A reporter from the Carbonia Times, who Odell knew well from his time at Hastmead.

"Odell, is this a sign that you're taking Osarius back to the old days? The times of di Corradi and such?" Gianni asked eagerly.

Well that was unexpected. Gianni obviously knew his history, understandable, being Fourgian. The di Corradi era was a great time to be Fourgian, after all. Sort of ridiculous that the great man never managed a World Cup qualification with the talent at his disposal: Jermain Lewis, Benni Watson, Dean Atkinson, to name a few. But no, Odell had no intention of adopting the same devil may care attitude that di Corradi had often espoused. He should probably make that clear.

"I wouldn't say so." He started, carefully. "It's just a fundamental truth of the game that to win, you have to score more than the opposition. If they're good at scoring goals, we just have to be better."

Gianni was relentless, however, and sensed... something. "Does that mean a greater focus on Dani Jackson?"

"Maybe." Odell shrugged. On some level everyone knew that Osarius would, by necessity, funnel attacks through Dani, of course. She was the best forward in the squad. "Or maybe there's an alternative, since that's what everyone expects."
Monarch: Alexander III | First Minister: Mathieu Lupin | Population: ~125 million | Capital: Burningham, Mount Crown
Civilisation Index: 13.43 • Tier 7, Level 2, Type 5
Current Project(s): a discord scorination bot, and a football manager knock-off

Useful NSSports Stuff | RabaSport.net

||A Loyal Citizen of Wakanda||

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Cobrio
Secretary
 
Posts: 31
Founded: Jan 09, 2015
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Cobrio » Fri Jul 16, 2021 5:26 pm

Marvelous Koleoso sat quietly at his desk, in his office, with only a lamp for light. It was late, and he had an important decision to make. The suspension of Baba Warrington for his red card against Osarius had coincided with a run of four gsmes wherein the Panthers picked up three victories straight wins after narrowly losing the first. Garnett Makanza possibly in the form of her life; scoring seven of the team's eleven goals in the process. Warrington had been available for the last game, against Ochre Islands, but Koleoso opted instead for Chikelu Okonye. "Chikelu offers a little more in the defensive phase," he had explained, before bringing Warrington on in the last ten minutes. Naturally, the Baba scored the winner. Hence the important decision. Recall Warrington, or keep using him as a super-sub?

Things were complicated by Warrington's post-match interview, which was... uh... typical Baba, really.

"Fear not brothers and sisters," Warrington had beamed into the camera. "The Baba has returned. I will save us from the humiliation of defeats, na." When told that a match against Avorago awaited Cobrio in the next round, Warrington frowned, saying "how can Avorago play football, na? Dey no go be smash on toast?" The interviewer made no serious attempt to explain the difference between Avorago and avocado.

The door to the office creaked open a little. "Marv, you in here?" Asked Samori.

Marv grunted in response.

"Come, brother." Samori opened the door and gestured outside. "Celebrate, na. We have plenty of drinks, and require more mouths to dey swallow."

Marv waved a hand dismissively. "You go drink, na. I must make preparations."

"Preparations?" Samori clicked his tongue in irritation. "Just tell squad dey go repeat. No preparations required, oh!"

Marv pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes. Samori wasn't all bad, but sometimes, talking to him was like pulling teeth. The man was unwilling, nay, incapable, of listening at times. That was the only way to explain it. "Samo," Marv sighed. "You know my job is no so simple, na."

"Yes, but your job is also no only..." Samori paused, searching for the words. "...Football preparations." He spat the words out as if they tasted foul.

"Preparations dey go be most important part."

"Ch!" Samori threw a hand up in frustration. "Just mek time and talk to people, na. You go return to preparations later. Important people dey come for speak you na dey no be happy when leave and no dey you see."

Marv suppressed a groan and leaned back in his chair. "Fine." He conceded. "But no drinks. I must keep mind clear for p-"

"Preparations, yeah yeah okay." Samori finished for him as they left the office.
Finally free of the oppressive yoke of the Osarian Kingdom.

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Legalese
Diplomat
 
Posts: 751
Founded: Sep 12, 2004
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Legalese » Fri Jul 16, 2021 6:11 pm

Image

Yo ye footballers, let us walk
Through this stadium tunnel, in search of truth
And some laced-up boots, and maybe a trip to the Semifinals


RP Cutoff for the Quarterfinals

at International Pitch, Tyrellia
Pyazhnaya 0-1 Saltstead

at City Stadium, Francis City
Osarius 5-6 Aut-Ves-Nat

at Declaration Point, Foxchester
Krytenia 3(3) -3(3) aet Grande Cucina
Krytenia advances on penalties, 3-1

at Mallahar International Stadium, Okerson
Cobrio 0(2) - 0(2) aet Avorago
Avorago advances on penalties, 2-1

Semifinal Fixtures
at Protectorate Road, Tiberia
Saltstead v Aut-Ves-Nat

at Shoreline Park, Spetz-Tessah
Krytenia v Avorago
Image
Last edited by Legalese on Fri Jul 16, 2021 6:22 pm, edited 3 times in total.
Host/Co-Host of:
World Cup XXII and LXVIII
The Inaugural CAFA Cup
AOCAF Cup V and XXXIV
Cup of Harmony XI and XIII
Baptism of Fire IX, XIV, XV, XVI, XLII, LII

Winner of Cup of Harmony 55 and Jeremy Jaffacake Jamboree II
Anaia: Like all the best ideas, this is moving from "lampoon" to
"take seriously" rather quickly

(H/T to Mertagne)

User avatar
Aut-Ves-Nat
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 23
Founded: Oct 03, 2020
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Aut-Ves-Nat » Sat Jul 17, 2021 11:03 am

Aut-Ves-National Report Madatory reading.
Except from the fortnightly address of The Grand Admiral

"Victory was assured again, my people. This has not been easy for us all I have had to wager against our players -- the divine stud muffins! -- Er... In order to secure victory in the eyes of lady luck, I've bet on the oppostion. In order to make the luck stronger, I've had to wager more against these Saltsteds than any other team! For funding, I have had to place a lean on our amusement park located on decks three and four! Now, this is in addition for debt to betting agencies around the world due to prior commitments. Thus, the Aut-Ves-Nat must have a financial safety plan! We always plan on the high seas, for we mustn't live under trees!

Our "TAARRRP" plan is simple. The tournament champions are awarded a prize, yes. The prize here the CAFA Cup trophy, also known as the CAFA Cup. This memento is pricey to be sure, made o' good materials landsman love. We will win this trophy, and then sell it to the highest bidder! I don't care who they are. If it is the Aleiusia Capital fan club, good! If they someone in the other region who lost trade and friends from that Foxchester Declaration, great! They might pay more than anyone! We will win w-the w-trophy, and sail before we are apprehended! Yo ho, ho ho! A pirate's life for us!"
Aut-Ves-Nat, the greastest sea fearing and/or seafaring nation ever!
All people this vessel are human, ingore any hydraulic fluids.

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Avorago
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 13
Founded: Jul 31, 2018
Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Avorago » Sun Jul 18, 2021 11:59 pm

CAFA I SEMIFINALS OVERVIEW


Following an anticlimactic set of penalties against Cobrio in the quarterfinal of the inaugural CAFA following a hectic extra time that saw four goals in thirty minutes after none in the first ninety, Avorago progressed to the semifinals despite only converting two of their five penalties, to Cobrio’s zero. But with only three teams left, it’s safe to have a good look at the Primates’ possible opponents.

Aut-Ves-Nat:

After being drawn into the apparent Group of Death and having been predicted to come last with little points, the Autonomous Vessel Nation came out of it with a 3-2-0 record and to this point, have not lost a single game. Saltstead will be a hard task for the boat dudes, but if you can come out unscathed against Audioslavia, Ko-oren and Starblaydia, then who knows how far they can go?

Saltstead:

They finished in second place in Group E with three wins and two losses, but ever since their 6-4 loss to the Quebecois they have found form similar to that of which they were able to beat Drawkland 5-1 with in the most recent World Cup qualifiers. They scored a goal against Ko-oren; an unimaginably impressive feat; before beating Pyazhnaya to face Aut-Ves-Nat in the semifinal. What a game that could be.

Krytenia:

That leaves us with Avorago’s opponent. Krytenia. A nation steeped in tradition, having played football since World Cup -5. They used to be a powerhouse, but over time, they have begun to lose more and more games in semifinals. They will still be a tough ask, but considering the Primates just happen to be playing the Krytenians in a semifinal, they will probably win and progress to the final. Maybe.

COBRIO - 2
Warrington 100’, 114’

AVORAGO - 2
Onwuamaeze 94’
Chiazagomekpele 109’

User avatar
Saltstead
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 150
Founded: Jun 12, 2018
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Saltstead » Mon Jul 19, 2021 11:27 am

A brief history of Saltsteadish semifinals

BoF 65: Saltstead 4–4 Acapais (aet, 3–1 pen.)

Saltstead started its Baptism of Fire appearance on a sour note, losing to Loynn 2–0, but went on a four-game unbeaten run to reach the semifinals (including a rematch against Loynn). Saltstead and former Cup of Harmony winner Acapais produced a semifinal classic, combining for eight goals and needing penalties to find a winner. Saltstead triumphed and went on to beat Aggrey-Fynn Land 3–2 in the final to win its only major trophy to date.

CoH 71: Saltstead 2–0 Darmen (aet)
In just its second Cup of Harmony, Saltstead did better than most probably expected just by reaching the semifinals. In a tournament of crushed hearts and stolen dreams, Darmen put up a valiant fight against the immovable Saltsteadish object, but simply found Saltstead’s potent counterattack too much to deal with in extra time. Unfortunately, the final ended in heartbreak, with underdog Juvencus pulling off a well-deserved shootout upset after a scoreless two hours.

CoH 74: Ko-oren 0–1 Saltstead
Ko-oren was the favourite for this tournament and equal to its semifinal opposition, but was ultimately stunned by an early Saltsteadish goal. Ko-oren refused to keel over, but simply could not find the crucial equaliser. Saltstead had beaten the odds in its most difficult semifinal, but ran out of luck in the final, losing to Kita-Hinode, losing all upward momentum and nearly losing Clement Kolen. We can only hope nothing like that happens in Legalese.

CAFA 1: Saltstead ?–? Aut-Ves-Nat
Watch this space.

The Royal Saltsteadish Football Association


Saltstead : Aut-Ves-Nat
Starting XI: Van Daal; Aurelius, Van Tilborg, Van Middelkamp, Rothöüf; Aħterop, Van Bleck, Ratmaker, Joxepħssen; Van den Slåp; Haråudssen
Substitute bench: Äsħes, Kåler; Josefssen, Åudenberg, Handel, De Vriħt; Sħåul, Felicianus, Le Duc, Pascal; Åubreħtssen, Withöüf

TLA: SAL(T)
iTLD: .zs
Demonym: Saltsteader
Adjectival: Saltsteadish
This nation does not necessarily reflect my actual political views
Discontinue use if rash develops
Don’t ⬋ play ⬋ with ⬋ fire
Qusmo - 06/08/2019

Maybe the real World Cup title was the friends we made along the way.
This space intentionally left
We are and shall be
Saltstead
Nothing more, nothing less

User avatar
Krytenia
Senator
 
Posts: 4127
Founded: Apr 22, 2004
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Krytenia » Mon Jul 19, 2021 4:45 pm

Krytenia and semifinals. The link between the two may no longer be one of guaranteed depression and failure, but losing in the last four is still a concept very much associated with the nation in the eyes of outsiders.

As to why? Well, to understand that we have to go back to the beginning.

The inaugural AOCAF Cup was the brainchild of the KFA, and so it was that they invited seven other nations to join them in a celebration of football. This is back in a time when Xile still existed, Nojika still paid attention to other countries, and Vilita and Turori took part in regional competitions separately.

The tournament hit a snag, however, almost immediately. Soul Expression yeeted on the eve of the tournament, disappearing in a cloud of invective, allowing NEWI Cefn Druids to come off the beach and play. The Druids took the opportunity with both hands, finishing second in their group to qualify for the semis. The other three nations - Vilita, Sarzonia, and ourselves - are nations that even now the multiverse is all to familiar with.

Krytenia would face NEWI in the semi-finals, and, if we're frank, were played off the park by them, finishing on the wrong end of a three-one result. They may not have been actual druids, but the curse took hold. There were occasions where it looked like perhaps the Dragons had escaped, only to fall back into old habits. Even winning AOCAF 52 - only their second appearance in the final of their own competition - proved to be a false dawn. It's only been in the last few cycles, with two Cup of Harmony final appearances, that the curse appears to have been broken.

Which brings us to today. Once again, Krytenia face an opponent in the semis of Edition One of a regional competition. The names are less familiar, perhaps, but it does beg the question: can the Dragons break through and bring themselves ninety minutes from destiny, or is the cycle about to begin anew? The answer is clear. We need to make Avorago toast.
KRYTENIA: RIP "Losing in semi-finals" meme. 2004-2020.
Capital: Emberton ⍟ RP Population: ~180,000,000 ⍟ Trigram: KRY ⍟ iTLD: .kt ⍟ Demonym: Krytenian, Krytie (inf.)
Languages: English (de jure), Spanish, French, Welsh (official regional only)

Hosts: Cup of Harmony 7, AOCAF 1, Cup of Harmony 15, World Cup 24, AOCAF 13, World Cup 29, AOCAF 17, AOCAF 23, World Cup 40, Cup of Harmony 32, Baptism of Fire 32, AOCAF 27, Baptism of Fire 36, World Cup 50, Baptism of Fire 40, Cup of Harmony 64, AOCAF 48, World Cup 75, AOCAF 40, Cup of Harmony 80
Champions: AOCAF 52, Cup of Harmony 78
Runner-Up: AOCAF 7, World Cup 58, Cup of Harmony 80
Creator, AOCAF & Cygnus Cup - Host, VI Winter Olympics (Ashton) & VII Summer Olympics (Emberton)

User avatar
Legalese
Diplomat
 
Posts: 751
Founded: Sep 12, 2004
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Legalese » Mon Jul 19, 2021 6:26 pm

Image

Semifinal Time. The cutoff is here, who will be playing for the first ever CAFA Cup?

Oh, and don't spill the Java when you see the results.

RP Cutoff for the Semifinals

Semifinal Fixtures
at Protectorate Road, Tiberia
Saltstead 0-1 Aut-Ves-Nat

at Shoreline Park, Spetz-Tessah
Krytenia 5-2 Avorago

Third Place Playoff
to be scorinated tomorrow
at The Coliseum, Tyrellia

Saltstead v Avorago

The Inaugural CAFA Cup Final
to be scorinated Wednesday
at National Stadium, Legalese City

Aut-Ves-Nat v Krytenia
Last edited by Legalese on Tue Jul 20, 2021 2:04 pm, edited 3 times in total.
Host/Co-Host of:
World Cup XXII and LXVIII
The Inaugural CAFA Cup
AOCAF Cup V and XXXIV
Cup of Harmony XI and XIII
Baptism of Fire IX, XIV, XV, XVI, XLII, LII

Winner of Cup of Harmony 55 and Jeremy Jaffacake Jamboree II
Anaia: Like all the best ideas, this is moving from "lampoon" to
"take seriously" rather quickly

(H/T to Mertagne)

User avatar
Aut-Ves-Nat
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 23
Founded: Oct 03, 2020
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Aut-Ves-Nat » Tue Jul 20, 2021 1:17 pm

Aut-Ves-National Report Madatory reading.
Except from an emergency address of The Grand Admiral

*Marcozy stood on a balcony, overlooking the second largest pool on the Western Front Deck* Our plan is working, mateys. Even the finest oracles of our nation’s history could not predict the glory which is before us now. I could list all of the useless dirt dwellers that have failed to us, but they will be forgotten in the tides of time. Our people, our vessel, they and she shall live on forever! Of course, our victory has come at a cost. Some creditors attempted to collect. We could not defend ourselves without causing an international incident. Though I heard the firm from the city of Ogroven had an “accident” at sea. Regardless, our men must win the CAFA Cup’s… uh… Cup.

*A series of what looks like a dozen John Opies, Carman Angeles, and Nigel Scwartzhammers began to surround Marcozy* If for whatever reason we are unable to procure what is needed. We will be forced to take it! *The Opes, Angeles, and Scwartzhammers cheered with fists in the air. The mouths stayed open, unmoving. The crowd too flooded out a groaning sound of victory. Marcozy’s arms folded up.*

I can conform, unless navigation proves fruitless, that this vessel will be near Numalia at the time of the final. I heard we were approaching international water, which are ours, and that our residency in Anaia could be interrupted! I would have moved our vessel closer to the final’s stadium. However, the land dwelling sycophants of the gracious host nation chose an inland capital. *The crowd laughed at the thought.* In any event, my subjects, crewmen, and customers, I will personally be transported there via helicopter -- *The Opies brandished firearms, that is to say, their arms were on fire.* -- along with friendly negotiators! Oh! Hohohoho!
Aut-Ves-Nat, the greastest sea fearing and/or seafaring nation ever!
All people this vessel are human, ingore any hydraulic fluids.

User avatar
Avorago
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 13
Founded: Jul 31, 2018
Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Avorago » Tue Jul 20, 2021 3:22 pm

Following Avorago’s unfortunate 5-2 loss to Krytenia in the semifinal of the inaugural CAFA, the people of the island nation have been taking bets on how Krytenians are going to use their Avorago toast pass (because a working television washed up on the shore. Don’t ask). Unfortunately, the results have not been disclosed as of yet, but here were the options:

What are the Krytenians going to do with their Avorago toast?
  1. Eat it
  2. Use it as camouflage
  3. As a jacket for warmth
  4. As a bed
  5. Toast fights
  6. Other (please specify)

If you wish to vote, too, click this link!



KRYTENIA - 5
Smith 31’
Belmwr 40’, 58’ (p), 86’
Snelders 65’

AVORAGO - 2
Chimaijem 18’
Okwuoma 47’
Last edited by Avorago on Tue Jul 20, 2021 3:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
Legalese
Diplomat
 
Posts: 751
Founded: Sep 12, 2004
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Legalese » Tue Jul 20, 2021 6:27 pm

Image

I know, playing for third place is like drinking decaf coffee, but hey, it's still a podium place.

RP Cutoff for the Third Place Playoff

Third Place Playoff
at The Coliseum, Tyrellia
Saltstead 2-3 Avorago

Congrats to Avorago, for finishing third in their first-ever international competition!
Last edited by Legalese on Tue Jul 20, 2021 6:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Host/Co-Host of:
World Cup XXII and LXVIII
The Inaugural CAFA Cup
AOCAF Cup V and XXXIV
Cup of Harmony XI and XIII
Baptism of Fire IX, XIV, XV, XVI, XLII, LII

Winner of Cup of Harmony 55 and Jeremy Jaffacake Jamboree II
Anaia: Like all the best ideas, this is moving from "lampoon" to
"take seriously" rather quickly

(H/T to Mertagne)

User avatar
Krytenia
Senator
 
Posts: 4127
Founded: Apr 22, 2004
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Krytenia » Wed Jul 21, 2021 5:59 am

As ever in Krytenia, it all comes back to Starblaydia. Sort of.

True, the Men In Mauve may have fallen before the Round of Sixteen, but still, somehow, everything comes back to them.

Krytenia's next and final opponents, the one team between them and an eternal legacy, are the nation of Aut-Ves-Nat. For those not in the know, AVN is less a nation and more of a...boat. An impressive boat, for sure, but still...boat. And Krytenia aren't the greatest fans of boats.

As to why, it's time for a history lesson. Cast your mind back. Waaaaay back. Before the current monarchy, before West Starblaydia (never, ever ask), and all the way back to when Krytenia were part of the SAAS, a grand alliance of...let's be diplomatic and call them "like-minded despots", who would occasionally meet, decide which thing to blow up next, and generally get extremely squiffy on blimey-strength vodka. One such meeting took place off the coast of Bisarley, Starblaydia, on a party ship fit for Tiberius Starblayde himself.

The meeting itself got off to a pretty casual start, with the aforementioned Lord-Protector welcoming all aboard to eat, drink and be merry. Among the guests was the then-leader of Krytenia, Chairman Andrew K Hessenthaler; however he was a mere spectator to the meat of the event, the accession of the now long-dead nations of Ratlea and Nova Roma to the Lavingrad Treaty. With the formalities dealt with, it was time for everyone, Hessenthaler included, to join in the festivities.

And that's when the trouble started.

Hessenthaler was, whilst not completely drunk, certainly at the "hey, watch this!" stage of inebrity. He decided that doing a cannonball into the ship's top deck swimming pool was a great idea. Sadly, he forgot the rule "no running by the pool" is there for a reason, and went into the water arse over teakettle, smacking his head on the bottom of the pool. Despite some valiant efforts from the Starblaydi lifeguard/eye-candy on duty, the injury was fatal, and therefore proof that boats are not to be trusted. To this day, Starblaydi fans taunt the Krytenians with chants of "who's that dying by the poolside, who's that lying in the sun?" in reference to this.

The conclusion from all this? Aut-Ves-Nat needs to be sunk in the interests of the national psyche.
Last edited by Krytenia on Wed Jul 21, 2021 6:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
KRYTENIA: RIP "Losing in semi-finals" meme. 2004-2020.
Capital: Emberton ⍟ RP Population: ~180,000,000 ⍟ Trigram: KRY ⍟ iTLD: .kt ⍟ Demonym: Krytenian, Krytie (inf.)
Languages: English (de jure), Spanish, French, Welsh (official regional only)

Hosts: Cup of Harmony 7, AOCAF 1, Cup of Harmony 15, World Cup 24, AOCAF 13, World Cup 29, AOCAF 17, AOCAF 23, World Cup 40, Cup of Harmony 32, Baptism of Fire 32, AOCAF 27, Baptism of Fire 36, World Cup 50, Baptism of Fire 40, Cup of Harmony 64, AOCAF 48, World Cup 75, AOCAF 40, Cup of Harmony 80
Champions: AOCAF 52, Cup of Harmony 78
Runner-Up: AOCAF 7, World Cup 58, Cup of Harmony 80
Creator, AOCAF & Cygnus Cup - Host, VI Winter Olympics (Ashton) & VII Summer Olympics (Emberton)

User avatar
Avorago
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 13
Founded: Jul 31, 2018
Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Avorago » Wed Jul 21, 2021 5:34 pm

What are Krytenians going to do with their Avorago Toast?
Image

As this shows, it appears as though the people of Avorago think that 40% will be used for toast fights, while the remainder 60% will be split equally between the birds, eating it and as a bed. Thank you to everyone for voting!

User avatar
Legalese
Diplomat
 
Posts: 751
Founded: Sep 12, 2004
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Legalese » Wed Jul 21, 2021 5:35 pm

Image

You know what time it is, brother.

Time to crown the Inaugural CAFA Cup Champion.

This is the RP Cutoff.

The Inaugural CAFA Cup Final
at National Stadium, Legalese City
Aut-Ves-Nat 2(2) -2(2) aet Krytenia
Aut-Ves-Nat wins on Penalties, 4-3

Congrats to Aut-Ves-Nat, on taking home the Inaugural CAFA Cup!
Last edited by Legalese on Wed Jul 21, 2021 5:39 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Host/Co-Host of:
World Cup XXII and LXVIII
The Inaugural CAFA Cup
AOCAF Cup V and XXXIV
Cup of Harmony XI and XIII
Baptism of Fire IX, XIV, XV, XVI, XLII, LII

Winner of Cup of Harmony 55 and Jeremy Jaffacake Jamboree II
Anaia: Like all the best ideas, this is moving from "lampoon" to
"take seriously" rather quickly

(H/T to Mertagne)

User avatar
Aut-Ves-Nat
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 23
Founded: Oct 03, 2020
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Aut-Ves-Nat » Wed Jul 21, 2021 9:16 pm

It was over, it all was over. Penalties did it. Sergey Ingenious did it with his game tying goal. The Autonomous Vessel Nation did it. Cheers were heard from the rafters both in the stadium and on deck. The closed circuit viewing at the Aut-Ves-Nat onboard amphitheater was so sold out nobody needed a tickets after a while. Shotgun wielding guars fired into the night's sky with flares. The old sea blue flag waved high in the sky as colors flowed around the night. The Grand High Admiral himself was at the finals, booed by a jeering crowd from all over the region. He found them all jealous of what was done by his people. Even so a few chanted "BOAT BOAT BOAT!" A nose was lifted, and Marcozy waved to his team's fans. "Admiral, Admiral," a lady from the press said, "Now that you've won the CAFA Cup, is it true you will be selling it off?" The Admiral scoffed, "No, we will merely be using it as a lean to avoid defaulting on our debts. This tournament was over budget for us, but the prize money is appreciated."

As the team exited the capital city by their preferred areal method, their personal jet plane exited Legalese air space, as did the High Grand Admirals' helicopter. Apparently the Aut-Ves-Nat it self had gotten lost on the way to port, and was in intentional waters. The Admiral's helicopter was carrying the CAFA Cup Trophy. Marcozy smiled at his prized possession, cash signs spinning through his eyeballs. "Polowski!" Marcozy shouted at the chair behind him, "My chief strategy guru, what is next in our plan to make the sea supreme?" The old and grey Polowski chuckled, "First, our debts need to be paid. We cannon dominate the land with creditors angry at us. It never had worked." There was a bit of turbulence, so Marcozy thought, and then a loud bang. A door was open. An emergency system prevented the room Marcozy was it from being exposed to the open air. After a few moments under red lights, men waltzed in, somehow getting past the security turrets. The men unstrapped the CAFA Cup from its seat, took the trinket, and darted off. Marcozy was unharmed. He looked over to his mad parter and screamed out, "Who the hell was that!?"

To be continued? (You thought final was spelled with finale? You're wrong! F is not in both of them.)
Last edited by Aut-Ves-Nat on Wed Jul 21, 2021 9:19 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Aut-Ves-Nat, the greastest sea fearing and/or seafaring nation ever!
All people this vessel are human, ingore any hydraulic fluids.

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