Pact of the Bros (MT Alliance)

[Third Spanish States]

Pact of the Bros

“I learned something very important about myself…I’m awesome”

Pact of the Bros Navy

Pact of the Bros Air Force

Bros of the world, UNITE!!!


In a society of bros among bros, one bro help the other and if someone who is not a bro picks up a fight with a bro, he picks up a fight with all bros. However, bros should not be restricted by land boundaries, thus an universal brohood is the way.


Bro, I'll be quick because I know reading long walls of text is not for Bros

For many years the bros rule the Confederacy. In the Confederacy everybody is a bro thus everybody rules! And everybody who isn't a bro is a sis and also rules! Those who aren't bros can't come here, and we bros watch each other. Thus the pact is given, the Pact of Bros, through which those who have the qualities to become Bros can join in, and like all bros, they will be protected by the bros. The Pact is destined only to real people, not to things that exist only on too long papers to read like nations, so it is more like that cool movie about the secret service protecting the man than about sending armies to help out bros far away. The Pact of Bros only protect individuals, not nations..

A bro must be a bro. If you are a bro you know what it takes to get in.

Are you a Bro or Sis enough to join this Pact? Answer this quiz at brozilla.org and learn!

Name:
Nickname:
Age:
Gender:
Number of times you brofisted:
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through:
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday?
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you?
Date with more than one person at the same time?
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly?
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro?

PS: Bros know legalese is for wussies and bros don't need long lists of rules about this Pact to understand the duties and rights of a Bro.

List of Bros

1. Everybody living in Third Spanish States
2. Everybody living in the Nations listed in the signature.
3. Mtumbe Ngoube (Satirius)
4. Colonel Anemos (Anemos Major)
5. Everybody living in Umbagar
6. deathshot (Nitom)
7. Marcel Delattre (Yanitaria)
8. Marie Eloise Laramée (Yanitaria)
9. James Kelly (Malkyer)
10. Could be you bro

List of Awards given to Bros

1. Colonel Anemos: 1 Medal of Bronor (donation of 60 barrels of Vodka)
2. All bros in all nations listed in the signature: 1 Medal of Bronor and 1 Purple Brofist each

[Satirius]

Name: Mtumbe Ngoube
Nickname: Tums
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Number of times you brofisted: Can't count, bro. Counting brofists destroys the spirit of the brofist.
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: 4, swore to have used a condom on two
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? Yes
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Yeah man. Bros first, bro.
Date with more than one person at the same time? Recursively
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Avid football and foosball player
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? Fuck them teachers

[Third Spanish States]

Welcome to the Pact, Bro.

If you pick up a fight just call us. However, you'll have to hold out until the time we buy the plane tickets and arrive where you are fighting the good fight.

[Anemos Major]

Name: Colonel Anemos
Nickname: Herr Oppressor
Age: 9000>
Gender: Man, you blind?
Number of times you brofisted: In the beginning, there was brofist.
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: Population boom, explained!
Did you ever: (Yes/No) Yes.
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? Yesterday? Hell man, you lucky.
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Odds? Hell man, I brawl if there is a brawl.
Date with more than one person at the same time? That shit with the world population.
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Hunt bears with fists, win.
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? Hell, man, I don't argue. I demand.

[Ustio North]

Name: Frankie Maloran
Nickname: "The Revolutionary"
Age: 21, Perpetually
Gender: Male, duh
Number of times you brofisted: Lost count at 2,000,000
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: 5, including a man who was micaculously impregnanted my the emanence of my manliness.
Did you ever: (Yes/No) Yes
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? I can't remember
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Having the odds against me is the only way to make it fair for others
Date with more than one person at the same time? Yes
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Football and soccer. At the same time.
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? No fun unless you do

[Umbagar]

%*$#! I put a crack in my screen thanks to the awesome "place fist here" sign.

[Anemos Major]

%*$#! I put a crack in my screen thanks to the awesome "place fist here" sign.

Dat bro...

[Third Spanish States]

Name: Colonel Anemos
Nickname: Herr Oppressor
Age: 9000>
Gender: Man, you blind?
Number of times you brofisted: In the beginning, there was brofist.
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: Population boom, explained!
Did you ever: (Yes/No) Yes.
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? Yesterday? Hell man, you lucky.
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Odds? Hell man, I brawl if there is a brawl.
Date with more than one person at the same time? That shit with the world population.
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Hunt bears with fists, win.
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? Hell, man, I don't argue. I demand.

Welcome to the Pact, Bro.

But remember, Bros don't oppress other Bros

---------------------------------------------------------

Name: Frankie Maloran
Nickname: "The Revolutionary"
Age: 21, Perpetually
Gender: Male, duh
Number of times you brofisted: Lost count at 2,000,000
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: 5, including a man who was micaculously impregnanted my the emanence of my manliness.
Did you ever: (Yes/No) Yes
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? I can't remember
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Having the odds against me is the only way to make it fair for others
Date with more than one person at the same time? Yes
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Football and soccer. At the same time.
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? No fun unless you do

Fact: Bros are Bros

You're not a Bro, man. :<

%*$#! I put a crack in my screen thanks to the awesome "place fist here" sign.

Bros, you're so bros that everyone living in your entire Nation-State is now a honorary member of the Pact of the Bros.

[Anemos Major]

Welcome to the Pact, Bro.

But remember, Bros don't oppress other Bros

Bro, I don't roll that way.

Gimme a brofist, bro. We brocool, 'kay?

[Ustio North]

Fact: Bros are Bros

You're not a Bro, man. :<

Hurhur. I'm so Bro, you don't even realise my Bro-ness

Oh well, plenty more fish in the sea.

[Libetarian Republics]

Name: Chad X
Nickname: X-Factor
Age: 24
Gender: Bro
Number of times you brofisted: Since Day 1
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: Lost count
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday?: Yes, bro
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you?: Hell yeah! Bros before hoes!
Date with more than one person at the same time?: All the time dude
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly?: Yes
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro?: Meeh. Fuck those teachers.

[Nitom]

Name:deathshot
Nickname:the boss
Age:14
Gender:male
Number of times you brofisted:my fist are bleeding
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through:how you explain china and those little kids tressed up as chinese people (not racist)
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday?yes
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you?yes
Date with more than one person at the same time?no
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly?yes
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro?hell i got put in gaep for almost stabbing a teacher(its on my record)

[Third Spanish States]

Announcement for Bros

Bro Mtumbe Ngoube of Satirius has been struck by an unknown evil in a dark street and went to hospital where he will need to stay in the suckitude of the hospital for 1 day. Because bros do bro things and sometimes bad things happen because many side against bros and even think all bros are like the same brain and person under different bodies and so what one bro does should be the fault of all bros. But don't worry bros I am very careful but one day the enemies of all bros will make even bros that don't pick up fights with the Antibro Clique like me take shelter in our BROtherhood and turf where they can't hurt the bros because in our turf it is us that run the show bros.

Now for the recent membership requests by would-be Bros:

Name: Chad X
Nickname: X-Factor
Age: 24
Gender: Bro
Number of times you brofisted: Since Day 1
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: Lost count
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday?: Yes, bro
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you?: Hell yeah! Bros before hoes!
Date with more than one person at the same time?: All the time dude
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly?: Yes
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro?: Meeh. Fuck those teachers.

You're not a bro. Bros respect all bros, even the fallen bros, instead of lauding the ones who did things against bros, like the countless represented by #2 in the List of Bros. :<

Name:deathshot
Nickname:the boss
Age:14
Gender:male
Number of times you brofisted:my fist are bleeding
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through:how you explain china and those little kids tressed up as chinese people (not racist)
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday?yes
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you?yes
Date with more than one person at the same time?no
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly?yes
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro?hell i got put in gaep for almost stabbing a teacher(its on my record)

Welcome to the pact bro.

[Yanitaria]

Name: Marcel Delattre
Nickname: The coincidence
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Number of times you brofisted: 7,666,042
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: I dunno, but my bro in Hàmnlande told me that his cousin had a child that looks like me, be he cool widdit and I brofisted the little dude. Paternity results still pending
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? Dude, the last thing I remember is being born (more liek BROn
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Every tuesday at happy hour when my bros and I go out
Date with more than one person at the same time? If by date you mean have I got to bars and hit on more than one woman in a single night, totally, bro, but I don't really "date" that much, a lot of girls around here have a lot of baggage, bro, you know what I am saying, liek I'd totally get wit dat, bro, but they ain't down wit dat, tellin me "Yo, bro you need to lay off, I am down wit'choo," an im all "Naaaaaah" but it's aight because my broseph Jean-Pierre got my back, bein my wingbro and i end up usually takin' one for the team wit the BBW chicks, but itsallll good bro.
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Hackysack, foosball, and XTREME frisbee
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? Ah, fuck yeah, bro, my econ professor was all like spewin that crap about structural unemployment when my bro was all like "naaaaaah, that shits a myth, and firms would just hire people and retrain them internally rather than go on operating below efficiency" and the profman, he was all "Young man, I have the proper phds in this room" and so I was like "dude, nahh, it ain't like that, see, if structural unemployment is my fist, and your teeth were the economy, then when I get done wit dat yo' 'economy' gonna be all sorts of fucked up! and that prof was just so struck by my bromanship and spectacular debating skills that he asked me an my bro to leave the class so i could have the day off, bro.

Name: Marie Eloise Laramée
Nickname: Jello cause im jiggly and delicious
Age: 25
Gender: Sis
Number of times you broSisfisted: eight times per hour since I was 14
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: 19, but i swear i am a virgin LOLZ but yeah i alwayz help out a bro in need if you no wat im sayin
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? every nite
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Hellz yeah bro sisz and broz always be lookin out
Date with more than one person at the same time? Hellz yeah bro, sometimes i finish wit 1 guy an i hav another
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Hellz yeah bro but the sort of sportz i play if i did in public it would get me arrested unless i waz in a super bro place like the third spanish state
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? i dropped out in the 4th grade but fuck if i had a teacher i'd be all haterz gonna haet an id have no problem cussin them bitchez out

[Third Spanish States]

Name: Marcel Delattre
Nickname: The coincidence
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Number of times you brofisted: 7,666,042
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: I dunno, but my bro in Hàmnlande told me that his cousin had a child that looks like me, be he cool widdit and I brofisted the little dude. Paternity results still pending
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? Dude, the last thing I remember is being born (more liek BROn
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Every tuesday at happy hour when my bros and I go out
Date with more than one person at the same time? If by date you mean have I got to bars and hit on more than one woman in a single night, totally, bro, but I don't really "date" that much, a lot of girls around here have a lot of baggage, bro, you know what I am saying, liek I'd totally get wit dat, bro, but they ain't down wit dat, tellin me "Yo, bro you need to lay off, I am down wit'choo," an im all "Naaaaaah" but it's aight because my broseph Jean-Pierre got my back, bein my wingbro and i end up usually takin' one for the team wit the BBW chicks, but itsallll good bro.
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Hackysack, foosball, and XTREME frisbee
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? Ah, fuck yeah, bro, my econ professor was all like spewin that crap about structural unemployment when my bro was all like "naaaaaah, that shits a myth, and firms would just hire people and retrain them internally rather than go on operating below efficiency" and the profman, he was all "Young man, I have the proper phds in this room" and so I was like "dude, nahh, it ain't like that, see, if structural unemployment is my fist, and your teeth were the economy, then when I get done wit dat yo' 'economy' gonna be all sorts of fucked up! and that prof was just so struck by my bromanship and spectacular debating skills that he asked me an my bro to leave the class so i could have the day off, bro.

Bro, youre the bro of all bros in Yanitaria. Therefore, we are bronored to have you brofisting at the Pact of the Bros (brofisting bro because you know siging is not for bros).

Name: Marie Eloise Laramée
Nickname: Jello cause im jiggly and delicious
Age: 25
Gender: Sis
Number of times you broSisfisted: eight times per hour since I was 14
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: 19, but i swear i am a virgin LOLZ but yeah i alwayz help out a bro in need if you no wat im sayin
Did you ever: (Yes/No)
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? every nite
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? Hellz yeah bro sisz and broz always be lookin out
Date with more than one person at the same time? Hellz yeah bro, sometimes i finish wit 1 guy an i hav another
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? Hellz yeah bro but the sort of sportz i play if i did in public it would get me arrested unless i waz in a super bro place like the third spanish state
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? i dropped out in the 4th grade but fuck if i had a teacher i'd be all haterz gonna haet an id have no problem cussin them bitchez out

Sis youre the sis of sis, we bros are bronored to have yo in our brostigious instititution. 'sides we all have to stay together and go together. It is like that thing you know, when the antibro gets in trying to take all but when we show the rap stuff all changes. It is like those dull principals of schools sis, that suck a lot and I was always trying to make them put me on the top of the blacklist but they didnt. Yo know why? Cuz I bought the school and not we dont call it school, but iscool.

[Satirius]

Mtumbe Ngoube ensures all fellow bros that he is doing well, and that asshole who mugged him with a bottle of cow's blood(a totally un-bro drink for people concerned about daily intakes of protein rather than gettin' wasted 'n' shit) in a dark alley.

He also hopes that he'd be "outta this shithole man" within the week and "surfin' it up instead of staring at white, I mean, dude, just all-out motherfuckin' white."

[Malkyer]

Name: James Kelly
Nickname: Kelly
Age: 22
Gender: Bro
Number of times you brofisted: I lost count after the first thousand.
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: There are 9.691 billion people in Malkyer, and I haven't worn a condom since 1997. Just sayin', bro.
Did you ever:
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? I can't even remember, bro.
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? This one time, I got the call from my boy Broseph Stalin that he needed some help fightin' Nazis. After kicking some serious ass, I fuckin' kicked Uruk-hai ass with my boys the Riders of Brohan. Then I fucking sprinted across the world to get my homeboy Bro Chi Minh's back when he had to fight those French pussies. Dien Bien Phu? Yeah, I made that shit happen.
Date with more than one person at the same time? Personal record: seven at once. Plus some hookups on the side.
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? All of them. Even non-bro sports become bro because I've played them.
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? I didn't go to school because real Bros already know every thing they need to know. But I still went by every high school in my town every day, to stand up for the Bros whose parents made them go.

[Third Spanish States]

Announcement

In face of the growing number of bros joining the pact, the bros have decided now it is the time to take the ultimate measure to make the Pact of Bros even more awesome than it already is: The creation of an independent Military Force of the Bros, the:

A sistatic member of the Pact called Aki Mali Schruberry Junior has been so cool she decided to make sizable donations for the creation of the Brorious Pact of the Bros Navy (PBN). By donating her personal warship, Aki has given to the Pact of Bros something very few alliances have: their own Navy. If you don't have one deal with it because you're not a bro. But anyway, we decided to rechristen the ship as the TBS (Their Bros Service) Superballs, flagship of the brorious Pact of the Bros Navy:



TBS Superballs

Type: Brottlecruiser
Length: Big
Beam: Which beam?
Draft: I don't even know what this word means
Displacement: 500,000 bottles of beer
Powerplant: That thing where we throw books because reading is for fags.
Maximum Speed: 80 mph, can't bother looking at the speedometer again to be sure.
Range: Ginormous. I think it'd run out of beer way sooner than out of fuel.
Complement: 30 bros, 30 sis, 4 waiters, 100 lapdancers, 1 gerbil.
Armament:
- 80x Rambo miniguns because they are so cool.
- 1 torpedo launcher welded inside the hull by Aki's uncle in the Navy. Definitively going to work. Ammunition: 1 torpedo because bros never miss.
- 160 beer can bazookas
Electronics:
- Three stages with separate acoustics for parties and full clubhouse gear
- Hundreds of freezers.
- 60 draught beer machines
- 20 microwave ovens because bros don't cook
- 25 Jacuzzis
- Integrated cell phone station
Endurance: Enough beer for 2 months

Thus, soon we will be recruiting bros for the Navy.

Meanwhile, for the new join request:

Name: James Kelly
Nickname: Kelly
Age: 22
Gender: Bro
Number of times you brofisted: I lost count after the first thousand.
Number of unplanned pregnancies you caused/went through: There are 9.691 billion people in Malkyer, and I haven't worn a condom since 1997. Just sayin', bro.
Did you ever:
Get so drunk/stoned you couldn't remember anything that happened yesterday? I can't even remember, bro.
Help a friend in a brawl, even when the odds were against you? This one time, I got the call from my boy Broseph Stalin that he needed some help fightin' Nazis. After kicking some serious ass, I fuckin' kicked Uruk-hai ass with my boys the Riders of Brohan. Then I fucking sprinted across the world to get my homeboy Bro Chi Minh's back when he had to fight those French pussies. Dien Bien Phu? Yeah, I made that shit happen.
Date with more than one person at the same time? Personal record: seven at once. Plus some hookups on the side.
Play football, soccer or any other Brosport regularly? All of them. Even non-bro sports become bro because I've played them.
Argue intensely with a teacher in defense of a Bro? I didn't go to school because real Bros already know every thing they need to know. But I still went by every high school in my town every day, to stand up for the Bros whose parents made them go.

Welcome to the pact bro.

[Yanitaria]

Bros, its your bro Marcel here,

I just wanted everyone to know that i just scored the high score on super broforce magnum, the toughest arcade game in my town.

brofists all around, and if any bros out there want, here is my credit card number to buy beers with

Edit: bros some antibro assholes used my credit card to buy shit in other countries, i am totally in debt in the most unbrolike way. its cool though, i just filed for bankruptcy, an now i have a delemma (sp bros?) ok so i told you bros about the bankruptcy thing right? well apparently any bro can rack up credit card bills and then flip off the banks like this. now, my brothah from anothah mothah, Brohan Brobinsky tells me that it inderectly hurts other bros by doin this, so is it antibro to declare bankruptcy? or is it super bro because i basicly figured out free money?

brofistingly,
Marcel

Edit: oh bros shit shit shit dont declare bankruptcy ohf uckad dsfkdasf they adfskd sja k taking anmfdasjf k computer afsdj

[Anemos Major]

Bros of the Brodom:

It's Colonel Anemos. Just like to say; Bros, it's official.

I got sixty barrels of vodka.

And it's all for the bros.

*brofist here*

[Third Spanish States]

Pact of the Bros Navy now open for recruitment

Bros of the Pact, we need a Brocaptain for the TBS Superballs, a bro that specialized in electronics like making all those cool tricks with cell phones to be the Brolectronic Brofficer, and a Brodmiral who is a clever bro and has lots of cool ideas while drunk to command the Bros Navy. Bro, if you want to apply for the position just write here why you think you're a bro enough to do it.

Bros, its your bro Marcel here,

I just wanted everyone to know that i just scored the high score on super broforce magnum, the toughest arcade game in my town.

brofists all around, and if any bros out there want, here is my credit card number to buy beers with

Edit: bros some antibro assholes used my credit card to buy shit in other countries, i am totally in debt in the most unbrolike way. its cool though, i just filed for bankruptcy, an now i have a delemma (sp bros?) ok so i told you bros about the bankruptcy thing right? well apparently any bro can rack up credit card bills and then flip off the banks like this. now, my brothah from anothah mothah, Brohan Brobinsky tells me that it inderectly hurts other bros by doin this, so is it antibro to declare bankruptcy? or is it super bro because i basicly figured out free money?

brofistingly,
Marcel

Edit: oh bros shit shit shit dont declare bankruptcy ohf uckad dsfkdasf they adfskd sja k taking anmfdasjf k computer afsdj

Bro Marcel,

It has come to the attention of all bros that an antibro did your entire bank account because antibros are like theat and dont care about being bros. Thus, because bros are bros among hoes, we have collected a common voluntary fund of $1 donation from each bro to help you bro. Fortunately bro, this donation have garned $ 2 billion already. Thus thanks to the bros you're now billionaire bro. Nevar forget the bros. Also to other bros, know that doing stupid things and getting poor on purpose in hopes that you'll get billionaire too won't work and is antibro, because the bros will run out of cash to buy beer, whiskey and vodka if everyone starting doing like that.

Bros of the Brodom:

It's Colonel Anemos. Just like to say; Bros, it's official.

I got sixty barrels of vodka.

And it's all for the bros.

*brofist here*

Congratulations Brolonel Anemos. For your ultimate broness you are awarded a Medal of Bronor.

[Anemos Major]

Bros, if you're reading this, you could be doing something brolific, so I'll make it br(o)ief.

I'm a colonel.

I have a uniform and medals.

A brodmiral needs a uniform and medals.

If you make me a brodmiral, we won't have to spend money on a new uniform and medals.

And do you know what we can do if we don't spend money on a new uniform and medals?

We can buy brotastic brodka and brostitutes (broes).

You know I know what you know you want to know, bros.

*brofist goes here*

[L3 Communications]

Just to let you know, I find this to be a humourous jab at the Conglomerate. I really did smile, even though it's probably more malicious than I like to think.

[Third Spanish States]

Just to let you know, I find this to be a humourous jab at the Conglomerate. I really did smile, even though it's probably more malicious than I like to think.

(OOC: If I explained it fully and detailed everything it is supposed to be a satire of, it'd lose the humor. All I'd say it's not really malicious, and it is not a satire of only one group, but of several.)

[Yanitaria]

Bros, its your bro marcel here

first let me thank you guys for being such bros in that now my bankruptcy issues are over. in return i am going to start the first ai(b)r(o) f(b)roce of the pact of bros. i have bought the following:


BROB-1337
[spoiler=(anti)broing stuff]
- Type: Br(o)awler passenger jet/swagger wagon/good time van
- Designation: Bro Brawler Number 1337
- Nickname: The brocopter, the brobrawler, captain lockheed and the starfighters, nul, the game (that you've lost)
- Crew: 60, 8 bartenders, pilot, pilot bartender, navigator, navigator's girlfriend, engine mechanic (so they don't blow up), radio operator, dj, MC, band (4 members, 20 strippers, 5 cooks (bacon fryer included) 5 waitresses, 10 man extreme frisbee referee team, plus however many bros to ride shotgun and passenger

Number Built: 2


---------------------------------

Dimensions:
- Length: 1000m
- Wingspan: 1000m
- Height: 10m
- Wing Area: wat i stole this layout and i dont know what this means, help a bro out
- Empty Weight: anorexic
- Maximum Take-off Weight: no fat chicks plz
- Combat Weight: about 40kg is a good size
- Combat Load: just as your sister what my combat load is ;D

Performance:
- Maximum Speed (Altitude): Mach 5
- Supercruising Speed: Mach 10
- Optimal Cruising Speed: Mach 7
- Endurance: 5 minutes, but that includes 4 minutes afterwards when i smoke a cig
- Maximum G Limits: what did i say about no fat chicks?
- Ferry Range: what is this i dont even
- Range: 80000000km
- Service Ceiling: 1000m
- Maximum Altitude: 900m
- Rate of Climb: infinitym/s
- Wing Loading: wat

Power:
- Powerplant: nukes
- Engine Weight: V8 turbocharged
- Dry Thrust: i use lube though
- Afterburner: only if someone lights a fart
- Engine T/W: ???
- Combined Thrust: just ask your mom
- Aircraft Thrust-to-Weight: STOP ASKING
- Nozzle: shower, full, stream, mist, flat

Armament:
- Gun: desert eagle baby YEAH
- Ammunition: >9000
- Underwing Hardpoints: if i am underwing, 1
- Fuselage Hardpoints: wtf is a fuselage
- Bomb Bays: this
- Maximum Possible Payload: 60 water balloons filled with piss
- Conformal Tanks: 60 barrels of alcohol
- Internal Fuel: burritos
- External Fuel: tacos
- Maximum Fuel Total: $700 dollars worth of taco bell food
- Normal Fuel Loadout: $860 dollars worth

Avionics and Equipment:
iPod
iPad
Nintendo DS
Bluetooth (for talking loudly in public)
a years supply of lambskin condoms.

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