Monkchester declares war on Munkchester

[Monkchester]

President John Bainbridge of Monkchester has declared war on Munkchester (Munkcestrian RepubIic), accusing Munkchester of "obviously stealing our name and culture". He added that "Munkcestrian slavery has led to our economy collapsing, as the tourists we are reliant upon are confusing us with them and boycotting us".

[Saranidia]

Saranidia condemns this aggressive declaration of war saying "we will stand by our Munkcestrian allies if this comes to actual combat".

[Munkcestrian RepubIic]

Lord President George Fenwick challenges the president of Monkchester to a duel.

[Monkchester]

Lord President George Fenwick challenges the president of Monkchester to a duel.

President John Bainbridge declines the challenge, saying to accept it would be "really fucking stupid" considering what happened to the last person to accept a Fenwick duel request. The Monkchester navy prepares to invade Munkchester by pretending that their ships are actually just fishing boats, which will be easy because the Monkchester navy already consists only of fishing boats.

[Munkcestrian RepubIic]

Saranidia condemns this aggressive declaration of war saying "we will stand by our Munkcestrian allies if this comes to actual combat".

OOC: How are we allies?

[Saranidia]

Saranidia condemns this aggressive declaration of war saying "we will stand by our Munkcestrian allies if this comes to actual combat".

OOC: How are we allies?

OOC: Remember Munkchester became allies with Saranidia during George Fenwick II's presidency.

[Saranidia]

OOC: can this be set in 2052?

[Munkcestrian RepubIic]

OOC: can this be set in 2052?

OOC: No.

[Saranidia]

OOC: can this be set in 2052?

OOC: No.

OOC: ok... but Ideal Britain is in 2047?

Please can you accept it being in 2052?

If you can't I understand.

[Monkchester]

The fishermen were very smart. They were so smart that you could write an entire post about them, because that is what is done on this forum. You are required to elaborate on how your soldiers FEEL when they are invading someone because that is GOOD ROLEPLAYING. That – them being very smart, not the roleplaying thing – is how and why they came up with the fishing boat disguise plan and executed it perfectly. How and why are two of the Five Ws (+ How).

The remaining questions were: who, when, where. ‘What’ was irrelevant and so was not needed.

Who are (“umm tense shifting is against the rules”) the fishermen? Well, they are both fishermen and military personnel. That is how Monkchester works and doing this sort of thing is a very sensible choice for your military. It has the added benefit of allowing you not to pay people anything because it is considered national service. When? Not 2052. Where? Munkchester’s port.

[Saranidia]

Now the Royal Al-Saranidi Army has pledged to defend the Munkcestrian Republic from external invasion,
the Al-Saranidi Foreign Legion targets recruitment ads at Munkcestrians.
for example:

"Join the Al-Saranidi Foreign Legion,
Glory, defence of the Munkcestrian Republic and defence of Saranidia!"

or

Want to defend your country?
Join the Al-Saranidi Foreign Legion

[Munkcestrian RepubIic]

The George Fenwick Situation Room was crowded with members of the government, top military officers, and a bunch of people who had just found their way inside. George Fenwick was at the table surrounded by his advisers. He was very relaxed and smug, convinced of victory.

His son, George Fenwick II, decided to make a great speech to make the moment even greater. “Look, okay? People have invaded us multiple times before, and you know what we’ve done? We’ve just nuked them. It works,” he said. Everyone nodded and cheered in agreement. “And, I mean, lol, we’ve had an invading army locked in the parliament buildings for over a year now.”

“Now, just pass me the nuclear suitcase… ah, here it is,” said Lord President George Fenwick, George Fenwick II's father. “Alright. Enter target, here it is. M-O-N-K-C-H-E-S-T-E-R. I am very careful, don’t want to get the ‘O’ and the ‘U’ confused,” he said, being very careful. Noting that he had indeed got the spelling correct, he pressed the big red button to confirm and launch. His advisers cheered, George Fenwick II among them. A livestream of the nuclear missile launches was set up. “See? This is going to be so epic. Imagine the look on their faces! It’ll be so hilarious!”

Popcorn was passed around. George Fenwick began to count down, with the rest of the room joining: “5, 4, 3, 2, 1… liftoff!”

Then the nuclear missiles launched, with payloads of 10 megatons each, and seconds later released those payloads, the nuclear launch system having autocorrected from “Monkchester” to “Munkchester” anyway.

[Monkchester]

Monkchester declares victory.

[Saranidia]

The George Fenwick Situation Room was crowded with members of the government, top military officers, and a bunch of people who had just found their way inside. George Fenwick was at the table surrounded by his advisers. He was very relaxed and smug, convinced of victory.

His son, George Fenwick II, decided to make a great speech to make the moment even greater. “Look, okay? People have invaded us multiple times before, and you know what we’ve done? We’ve just nuked them. It works,” he said. Everyone nodded and cheered in agreement. “And, I mean, lol, we’ve had an invading army locked in the parliament buildings for over a year now.”

“Now, just pass me the nuclear suitcase… ah, here it is,” said Lord President George Fenwick, George Fenwick II's father. “Alright. Enter target, here it is. M-O-N-K-C-H-E-S-T-E-R. I am very careful, don’t want to get the ‘O’ and the ‘U’ confused,” he said, being very careful. Noting that he had indeed got the spelling correct, he pressed the big red button to confirm and launch. His advisers cheered, George Fenwick II among them. A livestream of the nuclear missile launches was set up. “See? This is going to be so epic. Imagine the look on their faces! It’ll be so hilarious!”

Popcorn was passed around. George Fenwick began to count down, with the rest of the room joining: “5, 4, 3, 2, 1… liftoff!”

Then the nuclear missiles launched, with payloads of 10 megatons each, and seconds later released those payloads, the nuclear launch system having autocorrected from “Monkchester” to “Munkchester” anyway.

Since Munkchester nuked themselves Saranidis offers the survivors an interest-free loan of £26 billion to Re-build
If:
They abolish slavery and
Saranidia can raise a Munkcestrian Regiment.

[Munkcestrian RepubIic]

AUTHOR’S NOTE:

Munkchester originated in its earliest form back in June 2016, just a few days before I became a SUPER COOL MEMBER OF THE NS REALISTIC RPING ALLIANCE COMMUNITY (false advertising, it's really not cool at all though I was youngererer and really impressed by those people). That was as “Monkchester” and can be seen here.

The next iteration of Munkchester was almost two years away, which is rather surprisingly for me (I am growing old??) more than two years ago now. Wow. That’s actually awful. This one came about while I was visiting London in April/May 2018 and came up with REALLY COOL GEORDIE SINGAPORE, which then got derailed by my interactions with Azad which turned it into a slaver nation.

I don’t like Munkchester anymore. It sucks. It’s old and makes me feel old. Also, it is completely at odds with my political views and doesn’t make any sense considering them.

Edd of the Ash tree is all that remains of Munkchester now. That's fun. I like it. It's not old. The Fenwicks get to live on though because I may want to finally do the long-promised Bloodrod saga which will explain the history of the Fenwicks and a lot of things like that

You sort of ruined this with your rebuilding loan post Azad, but it's ok because I like you and I think we have formed a strange sort of bond and friendship over these two years. TWO YEARS.

do me a favour and hold me to this, btw. if i try to rp with munkchester EVER AGAIN point out that it's impossible because it nuked itself.