Dark Harvest II: War Hawks With Frickin' Lasers [ATTN DH1]

[Comrade Commisar]

Streets of Gerry,
Gerry, Turtleshroom

While most of the Yue 'Snow Leopards' and Black Guard had already left the city for other duties around Turtleshroom, some Black Guards were left for the monitoring of Imperial Shrine assets within the town. Police forces were easily expelled from the activities of the Imperial Shrine, seeing how the city was more of a lawless slum than an actually city. Nevertheless, when Ctani troops began marching down the streets, the stationed Black Guards took appropriate note of the situation.

"If it wasn't such a serious situation, I would've scolded the Ctani forces for being so flamboyant." An overlooking Black Guard mumbled to himself as he looked with a crowd of hundreds at the Ctani forces lockstepping down the street, "They certainly like to make a show out of their conquests."

Slipping out a cellular phone, he immediately began texting a small message for his comrades elsewhere in Turtleshroom, which would simply be transferred up the heirarchy to the High Priestess of the Imperial Shrine, Mei-Li Yue. Certainly while it was of no interest to the Yue of what became of Turtleshroom, the Shi Province had passed along their debts to the Imperial Shrine in an attempt to avoid economic collapse and humiliation. The Yue were merely protecting their newly gained interests, as well as possibly establishing the influence of the Imperial Shrine within 'The South Lands', which would open the possibility of Yue expansion to the South. The increase Ctani activity was of no concern towards the Yue, who, unlike the Shi, had no reason to be affiliated with the Ctani.

So far, the Yue would be in the position of observers, who would merely mark down Ctani actions for further archiving.

[The Ctan]

"If it wasn't such a serious situation, I would've scolded the Ctani forces for being so flamboyant." An overlooking Black Guard mumbled to himself as he looked with a crowd of hundreds at the Ctani forces lockstepping down the street, "They certainly like to make a show out of their conquests."

OOC; Heh. I'm presuming there's going to be some resistance at some point; at which point what they do will change radically; there's a reason the incursion is led by armoured vehicles, with footsloggers disembarked beside them.

[Ende]

OOC: Oh, hey, it's this again!

I should post. I'll do it soon.

[TurtleShroom]

The streets were quiet. Too quiet. Little scrappy catgirl children, some wearing veils, others wearing trashy clothes, scattered at the oncoming soldiers, and the police nearbly lifted their eyebrows.

Finally, the local "sherrif" of this district of Gerry exited a shuttered building smelling strangely of alcohol and a familiar, combustible product that resembles maple leaves when on the plant.


"Welcome to Gerry." he said plainly. "Now, what I see here is illegal, but your weapons are bigger than mine. -and frankly, I don't get care, just don't mess with THEM and you'll be fine."

The cop then removed a cigar and smoked on it, openly defying his office and TS law as the C'Tan looked on. He exited and whispered to a figure obscured by shadows. The faint clanging of cookware was heard, and the cop ran off.
Then, a well-dressed man with purple hair exited an even more dilapidated, seemingly out of a crawl space. He was eight feet tall and actually healthy in skin color, boasting a nice tan and perfectly straight teeth. A short pause realized that he too was wearing a scarf around his head, like a woman's veil, and some sunglasses, as well as a red jacket wrapped around his waist. He lifted his hands to show he was unarmed. His suit was of the finest two-pieced stitches around. Most oil tycoons, even billionaires, were too humble in this country to boast such luxury and extravagance. He, however, had wealth and knew how to use it.

"Nya ha, so you're-a the Etermal Necrontyr Empire of the C'Tan-ii, eh?" he said in a raspy voice with a familiar accent. "They call me Fat Cat 'round this joint, but youse, nyah, don't use nyah-icknames: you may call me Albert Domesticus. I am a legitimate businessman and am-a pleasently surprised at your brash-a audacity t' push around and terrify the TurtleShroomers. Nyah ha ha, you're real good at makin them nerds squirm. -but before you burn this place to ashes- nyot that such a thing is really of a concern ta me -would you care a moment ta talk with-a me? I assures you, I'm not armed, and if you see a gun as we speak, shoot-a me where I stand."

There was a moment of silence. Several sensitive C'Tani thought they heard a very, very faint motorboat at this time.

[The Ctan]

One of the necrons stepped over to the sheriff, golden body encased in heavy armour, a single jewel set like a third eye set in its forehead, "I am Judicar Karngys of the Necrontyr. This city is now subject to Necrontyr Universal Law, I request that you turn over all records on crimes to me, and will requisition your office. You are to assemble your men and creatures for full debriefing by my praetorians."

A column of the necrons marched off toward the station, nine in all, identical to Karngys, and armed with the same combination of some kind of wrist mounted weapon and weird black bladed weapons, smoothly taking over the station as though they had always been there.

__ __ __

A necron lord, lofty, eight foot himself, with a towering metal cranium, blue and red banners dangling from its gunmetal form, bowed to Albert Domesticus, "I am Grav Tharnal ita Thurasid, and I am most pleased to meet you, please, be aware that there is now no requirement for you to conceal your race, if you are comfortable without the concealment, I suggest removing it, we will deal harshly with any continued oppression. What can I do for you, Mister Domesticus?"

[TurtleShroom]

A gated community: ideal.

Limited ways in also meant limited ways out.

That was the reaction of the necrons as they emerged from the swamps to the area indicated as state hospital thirty-two-thirty-two. Their glowing weapons shrouded and dulled, they moved with quiet patience as they approached, a menace given away only by their glowing green eyes in the dark.

They approached the gates languidly, and prepared to summon additional equipment as they approached, one reached out to the bars, its hand suddenly flaming with green energies. Another and then another reached out, green lightning sparking into the metal as they held the gate two holding it, one gripping above and below the locking mechanism. Each necron contained a small annihilation plant, and could draw power from other sources, their guns drew power from their environment, or the necron itself,

The tactics were to be simple. Leave a necron at the main gate to shoot anyone trying to escape, warnings would be given of course, and then proceed up the road to the hospital, break the front door down, and inspect the facility; in the event that it confirmed their suspicions, they would then call in more necrons to begin an evacuation.

They did not need to molest the doctors and the other staff in their homes, so they passed them by in silence, trudging along the street in good order, the only staff they were interested in were those who were actually standing in their way.

When the moon shines bright, most every night, it will bring the creeps we have to fight;
-but when all I hear is howling wind, it's when I know there's something wrong tonight......

Night set over the state hospital complex. It was windy. A day came and went in the "company town" of sorts. A few staffers were wandering the streets, exchanging their scrip for food and goods. Others were just, for some reason, outside. It was about 11:00 PM, which was signalled by eleven "bongs" from the hospital's clocktower. It was the only sound around.

The C'Tan made no sound. Their claws wrapped around the beautiful gate, and its expensive, detailed forges melted to nothing.
Soon, there was nothing more than a hole where a majestic entry was standing.

Silently, oh so silently, they made their way into the community. There were ten privatized security guards in little sentry shacks along the street. Essentially, they had the weapons of mall cops. Two actual police officers, distinguishable by the traditional khaki robes and the badge, were holding a tall, silver replica of the Medical Staff of Hermes in their right hand, their left hand on their guns... -but they were asleep, too.

Two last creatures were ones to fear. Neither sentient turtles or normal turtles sleep.
Pacing back and forth, from sidewalk to sidewalk, were two turtles, each in identical getup. Judging by their size, three times bigger than a male turtle, these were both females. When it came to turtles, females were more vicious.

Upon their backs was a fully automated machine gun, armed to the teeth with a belt of bullets just waiting to be fired. Both were wearing a white combat helmet with a red plus. Their shells were painted white and adorned with smaller red pluses, as well. They were wearing night vision goggles (imported from Comrade Commissar). The bullet chain was so long, it dragged on the concrete, but it was actually a quiet sound. In their mouths were the intricate mechanical items that allow turtles to fire with the accuracy of any human, limited only by their training.

The gun was about a foot taller than the turtle, resting on a thick iron cylinder with tripod-like rods anchoring them further to the shell.
They were like little organic FT sentries. Mobile and possessing extreme firepower, the C'Tan were aware that while primitive and inferior in technology, these turtles were, without question, a threat.
The two turtles paced in opposite directions, passing each other in the middle of the street. The C'Tan were unsure if there were more of these, but this could be a problem....

....for a mere mortal.


The Necrons were quick on their feet, and decided not to stir the security. With the same silence they entered with, they made their way to the left, passing the sleeping guards and making their way over the fence into a staffer's yard. TurtleShroom didn't have dogs as pets- such an idea never caught on after they started killing the threatened nangnangs -and though it was unpopular to the rest of the world, the Asian immigrant population ate them... -and the white folks were warming up to it.
No dogs barked, then.


Sneaking over lawns and around guards, avoiding wanderering employees and paitients being taken to the doctors' houses for certain examinations and practices, they made their way to the actual building. One of the guards split from the group as the other Necrons hid themselves in the hedges around the building. He handed his weapons off and stepped up to the mighty doors........ he raised a claw......


...-and knocked.

[The Ctan]

“Look at those shells, they mean business,” one of the necrons said in a stacatto of quantum entanglement communications, so silent that they didn't even need to emit radio.

“Loving and caring institution... with a round the clock guard of machine guns?” another replied, “Not even tasers, or assault rifles, machine guns.”

“We shouldn't leave a live enemy behind us,” another said.

“They'll wake the settlement, if they get even a casual shot off with those guns.”

“We have to deal with them,” Marash said,

“We could wait for the next wave, and then call in some deathmarks.” one necron suggested, “eliminate the beasts silently.”

“I refuse to hold back against two turtles, in fact, no matter how many tortoises there are, I refuse to hold back,” Marash said, “Task ten warriors, bring me their heads.”

The necrons saluted and moved off, spreading out wide, their green eyes gleaming in the darkness, they were positioned so that the two turtles, who could only shoot in two directions, could only shoot at two or so of them, without needing to turn around; turtles were not known for being light footed – to acquire another target.

They held their gauss flayers, long, heavy rifles, ahead of them, but they were hoping that the turtles wouldn't fire; they would return fire instantly, but if the turtles were smart enough to surrender, they would save some effort, but any attempt to raise the alarm or open fire would result in their being shot five times each; and necrons were excellent shots. Even if glancing hits from the dust-guns didn't kill them, they would doubtless damage their weapons, which would be just as good.


Meanwhile, another “unarmed” necron knocked on the door of the facilitiy while ten more, including Marash, stood out of direct view stood aside, their metallic bodies generating some kind of line interference in closed-circuit cameras, leaving only one visible to any creature who came to open the door. If no creature did, then they would simply burn their way through as they had burned their way through the gate.

[TurtleShroom]

NATIONSTATES
ARMED TURTLE CONFRONTATION

{At the gates...}
Both turtles hissed violently at their sudden “guests”. Barely above a whisper, the larger, female turtle spoke to the C’Tani.

“This is a holy place of healing and rest. Unless you are here to conduct an observance of the hospital, as an inspector, international monitor, or state servant, you are ordered to exit the premises immediately. We are armed at military-grade to make up for the obvious, duel problems of Barney Fife guarding the hospital and the severe lack of arms elsewhere.”

The other, male turtle nodded, speaking in turn.

“We are the primary defense of this hospital. These guns, before you even think of attacking, can turn three hundred sixty degrees and turn you all into Swiss cheese at once. Most of the staff of this hospital are pacifistic and believe in healing alone, so the arms quantity is lower. As naïve as it is, they believe that no civilized realm would DARE attack an institution as pure and righteous as a public hospital. Barely anything above a taser exists in the staff homes. The hospital itself is a hospital, not an armory. I think they have hornet spray, medical waste, mace, surgical tools, and billy clubs.”

The first turtle, focusing sharply on the potential invaders, hissed again. She continued speaking.

“State your purpose here. You don’t have to invade to view the hospital. We are required by law to welcome any inspector. Or, if you have a loved one interned in here, you may visit in normal hours.”

Both paused for a response, obviously ready to open fire if need be. However, they were confident that the C'Tan were not going to actually invade a hospital. This is why they shared such intimate details.

[TurtleShroom]

NATIONSTATES
AN INSINCERE INSPECTION

Well they encourage your complete cooperation…
Send you roses when they think you need to smile…
I can't control myself because I don't know how…
And they love me for it, honestly I'll be here for a while…

The Necron knocked again, and the mighty doors creaked open. A white mushroom wearing a heavy chain necklace with a red plus as a pendant, similar in style to a pectoral cross, appeared at the door. Next to him was a grey mushroom, wearing a sash reading “CLERK”.

The first mushroom spoke in a deadpan voice.

“You have knocked. Welcome to Joshua Abraham Norton Memorial Lunatic Asylum. My name is Ailey Ill, and I am the graveyard shift usher for international observers. Seeing your entry into our asylum without intervention from the guards, you must obviously be an international observer.”

The clerk mushroom cocked what would have been an eyebrow and frowned at the beast.

“No doubt another whiney liberal thinking we hook innocent creatures to electric shockers or junk like that.”

The first mushroom glared at the clerk and looked back to the soldier, thinking he was a health inspector.

“Please state your purpose for coming to this mental hospital, and then you shall fill out the necessary paperwork and be screened for weapons. No weapons in this hospital. No exceptions. Firing a weapon in a mental hospital is a capital crime. After that, you may fully enter and begin the inspection of any part of the hospital you see. We will be willing to wake patients if you wish to interview them and will fully cooperate with your inspection in accordance with TurtleShroomian statute. We are, as we have always said, a place of healing, not torment, and have nothing to hide.”

He nodded, waiting for the C’Tan response.

[The Ctan]

“Then there's always the most powerful weapon of all to keep in mind.”

“Most powerful weapon? In what context?”

“Why of course, in every context, Deception.”

- Ranisath, Elenaran of the C'tan, and Princess Luna

The Checkpoint

The necrons were happy to exploit turtle naivety.

“We are an inspection mission here to supplement the defensive requirements of this hospital in accordance with occupation protocol seventeen, sub-section four, paragraph D. It is our intention to ensure that no anti-necron militants are able to use the facility as a headquarters to avoid being bombed by our forces. We have heard reports from elsewhere of such facilities being used as creature shields by particularly ruthless militants. How many guards do you have here, are you secure?”

As the first necron spoke, the others lowered their weapons, “Are there any other entrances militants could get in?”

The Hospital

“We are here to inspect this hospital for militants,” the necron said, in constant silent communication with his fellows, “We have heard that militants have been using hospitals as locations for human shields. How many people – creatures are here?”

OOC: Apologies about the brevity. Conversation posts tend to be short by nature, also I want to see if either spot the lie.

[TurtleShroom]

“We are an inspection mission here to supplement the defensive requirements of this hospital in accordance with occupation protocol seventeen, sub-section four, paragraph D. It is our intention to ensure that no anti-necron militants are able to use the facility as a headquarters to avoid being bombed by our forces. We have heard reports from elsewhere of such facilities being used as creature shields by particularly ruthless militants. How many guards do you have here, are you secure?”

The turtles looked very suspiciously to the C'Tan.

"Occupation protocol? You ain't occupying TurtleShroom... -and as a civilized nation, you don't bomb hospitals. Further, the Zim Belt folks may be rebels against the government, but they're still TurtleShroomers. They ain't going to fight a hospital. What is the goal in that? No military advantage."

The second turtle glared.

"In almost any circumstance, we'd buy your tale. -but your people betrayed the late Marshall of the Nookular Branch of the military and attacked them when they were ceremonially dressed unarmed, after they fully complied with your commands."

The first turtle concurred.

"Your people are as sleazy and deceitful as the Victorious Decepticons. However, you don't attack hospitals. YOU DON'T. ATTACK. HOSPITALS."

He said that last part as if he was issuing a death threat or an order to charge at an enemy.

"-because of that, we will let one- JUST ONE -of your lying kind into the Gated Community of this asylum, to prove to you that there ain't Zim Belters in this place."

Both turtles nodded.

---

“We are here to inspect this hospital for militants,” the necron said, in constant silent communication with his fellows, “We have heard that militants have been using hospitals as locations for human shields. How many people – creatures are here?”

The deadpanned mushroom looked to the clerk mushroom.

"There are no Zim Belters in this hospital. They do not use psychiatric hospitals as bases of their operations. We know this because we undertake measures that are state secrets and would jeporadize the measures we undertake to know there are no Zim Belters in this hospital. There are no Zim Belters in this hospital."

The clerk frowned, as well.

"There are twelve thousand rooms in this asylum. Nine thousand, six hundred fifty four rooms are filled with one paitient per room. We tend to spread paitients throughout the country to avoid maximum crowding. There are also an additional one thousand in the tuberculosis building, separate from the rest of the complex and outside the gated community about a mile from here. It is not operated by the State Hospital Service, but uses its land. They have tuberculosis, so don't go in there if you can get earthly diseases."

Both paused, and the clerk spoke again.

"You, and you alone, no one else, are free to enter. We aren't sure if there's someone hiding in the hedges or in the roof or crawling in the vents or something nuts like that, but you, and you yourself, only you, you may enter."

The deadpan mushroom floated aside and nodded ever so slightly, gesturing for the single Necron he saw to enter.

[The Ctan]

Hospital, the Gate

The necrons didn't respond for a long moment, before realizing that they could probably divide up the guards more if they went, and then the other group, by the door, could ambush this one turtle, while the other nine would remain here; the other turtle would surely want to guard them.

“Very well,” one necron said, passing its weapon off to another with a shrug of its mechanical shoulders. “I will go with you to the hospital building. Will you escort my comrades back to the gate?” he asked, “or shall we simply go that way ourselves?”

When they were divided nine necrons would get the one that took them to the gate, while another eleven would take the one that took him up to the main building, while the twenty first warrior was in the building with the clerks.

Hospital, the Tour

“I actually meant how many staff, because our instruments said that about thirty people were moving around outside recently,” the necron lied, “but yes, I will fill out your forms if you require. Lead on. And yes, we expect you of being immensely cruel, that is true,” he said.

He would wait until they didn't expect it, and then attack both mushrooms, the necrons were not yet sure if a mushroom could be knocked out, so he would take no chances, and wait for them to be well inside the building, where their screams couldn't be heard from elsewhere, before attacking them.

Prison Camp Human

Meanwhile, the Zim Belters were being introduced to their new homes, prisoner of war camps, where they would be held. They were divided up by species, to better ensure they were kept in conditions to frustrate them. The Turtleshroomers were a free people, and thus didn't bear confinement well, the reasoning ran, and so the humans were taken to a specially built facility.

The prison camp on an island off the north of the Worldspine Mountains was unique in that it was actually on Earth, a featureless grim block of misery, used for many prisoners before, it had been built for ordinary humans, and thus all the floors and doors were too low, drafts constant. But the guards. The guards were the worst.

“I am Tosjuni Ensjufir Firsjuni Åttfemtre, in your language, Two Seventy-nine One Seventy-four, Four Seventy-nine Eight Fifty-three, but you scum may just call me SIR!” the commandant addressed them from a balcony, his black and white uniform starkly clean compared to the grimy environment, “What you horse-hating scum need to know about me is that I was picked up for being too cruel to prisoners in New Freedomstan. That's right. By the standards of communists, yeah, capitalist pig-dogs, you heard right, I am notably unpleasant. Cross me, and you're dead. Or you'll wish you were. Get them to the machine-shops. Put them to work.”

Down, down, down they went, into individual cubicles where they were put to work with metal stamping machines – too narrow to fit hands or fingers into – that stamped out metal or rubber for horse-shoes to be sold in Coalition states.

Prison Camp Mushroom

The Mushroom prison was crueller still, as the necrons still didn't understand mushrooms fully, they were taken to weird prison cells where they were locked two to a room and left alone, occasionally soil was dropped in through a hatch in the ceiling.

Prison Camp Turtle

A transport loaded with the thousands of tutles captured so far went to the great capital world of Duat, where they were taken to a public park and indiginties were performed on them, while turtle jaws were respectable weapons, once unarmed, turtles were slow and couldn't get at anything on their back, so carefully supervised some were put to work as rides, their jaws held shut with firm elastic bands. Children seemed to love them.

In the mean time, their wild cousins provided ample knowledge on how to care for turtles, and a huge, U shaped enclosure under great heat lamps was built, excavated with ferrocrete walls, the prison just a huge tortoise table, but built as a massive ditch in which the unfortunate turtles were imprisoned akin to a home design save that it offered no privacy at the ends, with a fence around the top which spectators could watch from. Occasionally they would be taken out by a flying necron and deposited for 'duty' giving rides, but also occasionally spectators above their enclosure would throw things down at them, usually fruit of some description. Ponies particularly, not that there were many, seemed to enjoy pelting the poor tortoises with edibles.

OOC: If you want to try and RP an escape from any group of these, feel free; but I'm presuming all guns are off them now, lots of X-rays and such.

[Comrade Commisar]

Eagle International Armory Compound - Gerry Branch,
Gerry, Turtleshroom

Clink. The sound of yet another can of rations as it was placed aside an entire 'neighborhood' of cans. A Black Guard carefully arranged them, building a small city within his spare time - which had accumulated into weeks.

"Again with the cans?" Another Black Guard said, this one stationed at the window with one of the many surplus rifles in the armory, "Everyday, you walk around for cans to build your little city. Don't you have anything better to do?"
"I formerly wished to become a city planner," Stated the Black Guard as he placed some lugs and bolts onto the cans, "Besides, if you haven't noticed, I have been building a replica of the city of Gerry..."

Ever since the Ctani occupation, the stationed Black Guards within Gerry isolated themselves within the EIA Warehouses - which had been bought by the Yue - barricading doors and living upon the surplus material inside. Gerry, in their eyes, had turned into a free for all, where the questionable roamed the streets, the remnants of the corrupt police force uncaring, and the Ctani occupiers arresting indiscriminantly. Many of them were in pairs, separated from each other, living off whatever material they could scavenge. Commonly, the only reason they had not exited the city was due to the Ctani siege of Gerry, although officially, the Imperial Shrine had not given orders to relieve themselves of their post. Either way, they were stuck in Gerry until one thing happened, or the other.

"I really think you have too much spare tim--" The Black Guard with the rifle immediate paused, followed by him scurrying to look through the scope of the rifle.
"What is it?" The other Black Guard asked, grabbing his pistol and moving towards the window.
"High Priestess Mei Bai-Ying and her escort, the one pulling the strings in the South Lands..." He said, putting his rifle down, curious as to what was happening.

High Priestess Mei Bai-Ying acted upon the whims of the Imperial Shrine, who had assigned her a position within Turtleshroom. Controlling all operations and acting as the representative of the now expansive Yue Empire, she was quite an influence within the area. However, with the increasing Ctani influence on the Turtleshroomian military and people, corruption was halting many planned Yue operations within 'The South Lands'. Formerly, she requested an envoy to be sent, although she eventually decided that meeting the Ctani in person would ease the burden of sending messagers back and forth between Litlin and Gerry - those messagers that could be messaging the Imperial Shrine back in the North Lands. Walking down the streets of Gerry with her assistants, the banners of the Yue attracted some attention within the now anarchic town.

"Hey, you girls are quite cute, why don't you work for me--" A local street pimp said before the tips of five naganatas were at his throat.
"Talk to the High Priestess in that manner again, and we shall rip out your tongue, filth." A lower priestess said before ordering the escort to continue and knocking the man to the ground with her polearm.

"It is not as if such low life forms are a threat to us," Spoke Bai-Ying confidently, "I'm sure even one of the lower assistants could possibly be more than a match for any other filth who would stand in our path."
"With all due respect, High Priestess, we are concerned for your safety." Spoke the priestess in a monotone like fashion, "Please be more careful."
"If you are concerned, you should have not allowed me to come to Gerry in the first place. The Ctani have been known to abduct Turtleshroomers around the area, they are said to be sent to a prison far in the North, never to be seen again." The High Priestess smiled, "I jest. Take no worry, after all, the Ctani are dealing with the Guard of the Northlands, who has eliminated entire Khek and Tsao divisions with her holiness. While the Ctani are knowledgable in science and technology, the Yue People are masters of the Northern Arts and have recorded history since the founding of the North Lands. Trust me, nothing shall occur."

Ordering the escort to stop, the High Priestess walked up to a Ctani officer and politely bowed.
"Iron Guard, where is the leader of your faction? I wish a conferrence, if that would be of convenience. While we are armed, please note that such arms are only of ceremonial use, and shall be placed away during our conferrence." She smiled, "Iron Guard, what is your responce?"

[The Ctan]

The Necron looked at the group of females draw swords on the pimp. There were two points of view, the first that he had insulted the females, on the second, physical threats of this nature were criminal, while propositioning was not.

"I am not an Iron Guard, I am a necron," the necron said, holding its staff, "You are hereby warned not to draw weapons on anyone for mere words again, save in an honourable duel. Should you do so, we will arrest you. Overlady Cyash will see you."

He lead them through the city, where necrons were spread out patrolling the streets and installing all kinds of small black devices, often on lamp poles, what they were, a mystery to the natives. They were a Menelmacari Black Arrow surveillance and counter-insurgency suite, in its most cut back form, and would be linked to units all around the city, later. A single gun discharge would be rapidly heard and triangulated.

Cyash had occupied the town hall, necron guards with weird swords and huge glowing shields stood on either side of each door, the area reinforced with trenches, barbed wire, clearly labelled mines (behind the barbed wire) and several hulking monoliths parked around it. Turret guns crackled with weird energies. A huge pylon, a weird crescent of green metal, towered in a square nearby to intercept missiles. Huge necron banners hung off the building, and the sign had been replaced with one labelled "Necrontyr Occupation Authority."

The group were shown into a confrence room with a huge necron lady, a skeletal robot easily eight standing at one end, even the chairs built for turtleshroom humans didn't support the weight of her combat chassis, even though they were big enough to fit her.

"I am Royarch Cyash, in your terms a Major General, and Nemesor, that is to say supreme commander, of this campaign. What is it I can do for you, Turtleshroomers?" she said, her vocoder sounding distinctly female.

[Comrade Commisar]

According to the Imperial Archives of the Yue, the Ctani were a technology cult - masters of iron and unknown energies. This was the polar opposite of the Yue, who abandoned technology for religion and purity. Likewise, while the many structures of the Ctani occupation, while startling, were of no particular concern to the Yue. Bowing in thanks to the Necron Guard, the High Priestess looked up towards the eight-foot tall Cyash, who was met with the polite bowing of the Yue entourage.

"With all due respect Royarch Cyash, we are not of the South Lands." Spoke the High Priestess as she arose, "We are of the humble Yue Empire of the North Lands. I am High Priestess Mei Bai-Ying, representative of the activities of the Imperial Shrine and High Priestess Mei-Li Yue. I have come to speak with you about the current conditions of your occupation of Turtleshroom."

"As one of the most influentual people within Turtleshroom, it has not passed me that many Turtleshroomers are uncontent with your occupation. However, recently, notable incidents of corruption, crime, conspiracy and the like have begun blooming out of the ashes of the once great nation. Citizens are discontent, and as the day passes, the Western Rebels grow in number - not weaken." The High Priestess placed her arms within her sleeves, "It appears that the occupation of your peoples have instead amplified the rage projected at the Ponyist Coallition, and has not quelled such resistance. This disruption of harmony is quite startling towards the Imperial Shrine, and has not gone unnoticed amongst the High Priestess and her advisors. So, Royarch Cyash, how do you propose we handle this quite disturbing situation?"

The High Priestess quickly retrieved a scroll from one of her assistants, opening it to read its contents.
"The Imperial Archives have much information about many subjects of the world, and your species is not excluded from this vast wealth of knowledge. It is said here, that the C'tani are not from our world, but rather deities transferred from the realm of the spirits into the world of humans. However, your people are not of the C'tani race, and thus, I formally appologize for ever referring to you as such. No, you are of the Necrons, written in the archives as the Iron Golems who were betrayed by their very gods. As such, that has formed the basis against genocide and slavery, while at the same time maintaining a cruel and murderous demeanor." She said as she closed the scroll and handed it aside.

"I digress." She said as she looked at Cyash, "In any case, however, the Western Rebels continue to grow, and your efforts in quelling the resistance are unfounded. Likewise, you are not seemingly willing of ending the campaign until the destruction of these rebels, which has included multiple military, police, and security personal who were originally against the rebels until your evergrowing involvement. This failure of technology and science, has amplified this normally small conflict into a notable war, which has effected many areas within the South Lands. This is not a matter science or advanced technology can quell. No, for the people here within Turtleshroom, devote and pure, it is only a matter that can be resolved by only the will of the gods - something the Yue just happen to be proficient in."

"Technology such as the Necrons harness," The High Priestess smirked, "T'was developed in jealousy. Made by those who were either undeserving or unnoticing of the gods' presence, a mere imitation, you may say. The Turtleshroomers? They believe in the gods, but instead have harnessed technology, and thus are unable to project the immense power of such gods."

"What I am trying to say is," The High Priestess coughed, "The Imperial Shrine shall attempt to restore harmony within the South Lands. First, by conquering the Western Rebels with not science, but 'magic', as the simplified term of it goes. The Turtleshroomers are a resilient people, but even they know the presence of the gods. The difficult part, is the mere presence of the Necrons themselves, which enacts fear upon the populace, a resistant fear that shall lead to resistance. We wish to know how the Necrons shall behave once the Western Rebels are eliminated, shall they occupy the South Lands, or shall they merely leave and allow the area to return to normality? With the positive interaction between the Yue People and the Turtleshroomers, we believe we would provide a much stabler interaction than if the Necrons remain. That is not to say we would allow unacceptance and ignorance that allowed the Harvest of Darkness to begin in the first place, but rather, we would allow Turtleshroom to keep their policies, although diluted and more accepting of certain individuals."

"I know it is not the most ideal of measures, however, once harmonization is lost, reestablishing it is a slow and difficult task." Mei Bai-Ying stated, "We are not asking of your immediate evacuation, but rather attempting to find solutions that will amend all parties - neglecting the original perpetrators - and will result in the re-harmonization of the South Lands. If you have any objections to our task of reharmonization, please speak of them now." The High Priestess finalized, somewhat exhausted from her speech.

---

High Priestess Mei Bai-Ying has a habit of misunderstanding information and calling certain entities by other names. Any misunderstanding of information is probably all according to her personality.

[The Ctan]

“I see, the leader of the Imperial Shrine of Yue no less? You are fortunate that you are no longer co-nationals of the Khek people, or I should have you seized at once and taken to Duat for interrogation and your retainers immediately taken out and tried as slavers. It is no matter, you are not to my knowledge slavers, and thus may stand before me and live,” the necron said, “as I said, fortunate.” before listening. For a long time the necron lady stood silent, almost looking as though she had been shut down, until at last she moved. “We have heard of you,” she said at last.

Cyash shook her head, “You do not understand, it is no matter, much fallacious information is put around about our history, and we are rarely keen to correct the misconceptions of others,” the overlady said, holding up one hand.

“Know this, the C’tan, called by some the star-gods were one our allies, then we broke them and cast them down, some few are among us now, but they are not our gods, they are no more deserving of worship than I or he,” she pointed out of the window, her clawed talon pointing at one of the natives, “are. Though perhaps less,” she added thoughtfully.

“You miss a vital point, High Priestess Mei Li-Yue. You speak of spiritual enlightenment. But the Turtleshroomers are wiser than you, yes, wiser oh High Priestess. They believe in only one God. They know that there is only one being beyond the Universe worthy of worship, be it called Jesus, Brahman or Ilúvatar, they are fallen from His cause, but they are nonetheless wise enough to know that worshiping your deities, or as you put it, ‘know the presence of the gods.’ They will be viewed rightfully as something trying to draw them from the path of Righteousness, and you as agents of what they call Satan.

“We are not the fools you take us for, we are aware that your Imperial Declaration Twenty Seventy Three, and your imperialist intentions in this land, Kame no Tochi, I believe you call it? We will not be fools enough to help you enact your intentions. These people have their failings, and the many failings of the Turtleshroomers infuriate me more than many, but they know at least a measure of Freedom, and would not lightly suffer the yoke of another upon their shoulders, and we would certainly not help you put it on them.

“You speak of conquest, and you think a few magical tricks offered by whatever idols you worship will make them abandon their beliefs?” the necron sounded incredulous “Even I would not think to conquer these people, I could wipe them out, certainly, but they will fight to the end for their property, their freedom and their faith. Behold me, I can crush a grown man with a flick of my wrist, or pry the hatch from a battle tank. One small turtle hatchling attacked me on this campaign. An unarmed creature no bigger than your hand, its father came out to try and save it from me when I picked it up, marveling at its courage, I let it go of course,” she added, “I have seen mighty hewed demons of the so-called blood god, stitched together from lies, drop their weapons and flee in terror at the sight of me and my kind,” she said, “and transhuman warriors with thousands of years experience drop to their knees before me and plead for a swift dispatch, and civilian turtles are braver then them and a myriad of foes from stalwart fascists to leering slavers and formless things of the Id. This isn’t to say they’re all courageous of course, but such bravery exists here that even I consider the task of conquest, save perhaps this city only, impossible and you think you will cow these people into submission with parlour tricks?

“The natives lack strength, but for every weakness they have on the field of battle, they are bestowed in equal measure with an admirable strength of the heart. It is a great shame that they are our enemies and not our allies, and perhaps in time our differences can be overcome.”

She paused, “We are here to serve a simple political goal, not to oppress the people, or to annex them to your North Lands, but we are not bound to defend the Turtleshroomers, so you are free to do as you wish, we will not interfere provided you behave well to civilians and captives. But know this, beyond the limits of this city we will make no effort to save you from the consequences of your actions; if the Turtleshroomers decide to burn you for witchcraft, or something else similar, then they are welcome to do so as far as I am concerned, that is the price you pay for entangling yourself in others’ affairs.

“You are surely not foolish enough to deny that they will not take well to whatever creatures you worship, and whatever power they offer you. Such things are witchcraft to them at worst, and blasphemy at best.

“We are not so foolish, we know full well what motivates the Turtleshroomers, but we also do not care about the effect our occupation has, nor even do we care meaningfully about the radicalization of the people against us. We are here to make war upon them, until such time as they give in to our original demand, and negotiate peace with ourselves and the Greater Pony Herd.

“That is why we have been taking those soldiers and militia that fight us, and imprisoning them, they are prisoners of war, they will be held in accordance with honourable treatment until such time as we are satisfied that a peaceful solution to the war is arrived at, if that means they languish in our prison camps for a century or more, then so be it,” Cyash said, “we bear no particular ill will to them, but they cannot be permitted to expect to make peace with us and not our friends, we are faithful to our friends, and we will not tolerate such an insult to our honour.

“If you want this to end, I suggest you bear that message to the Turtles’ leadership for me,” she said.

“One last thing,” the necron said. “Ilúvatar gave reason to sapient-creatures. It is with reason that we developed the systematic understanding of the physical world, through observation and experimentation, through argument and debate. From this science we developed the technology we now have. To claim that it was developed simply in jealousy of the Old Ones and their sorcery is base ignorance of the deeds of our ancestors, and to claim that it is somehow against the will of Ilúvatar to have such technology is madness. All things ultimately reflect through Universal Providence to His glory, technological achievement no less than anything else.

“Our history stands behind us, and it is full of mistakes, but it is through Grace that we are reborn with a nobler purpose than ever before, our society today, the superior of the one into which I was born in every respect.”

[TurtleShroom]

{OOC: That scene with the pimp was just PERFECT. PERFECT. That is exactly what a seedy street walking villain in Gerry would do when looking at a catgirl: he'd offer her... that.}

{OOC: As for the discussions of the C'Tan on the TurtleShroomers, I really enjoyed that. The part about their courage and their "heart" was a pleasing read. I'm glad you enjoy how my people are portrayed. Their collective will to defend against far superior enemies is actually based directly on my RL home's culture. In the USA's Southeastern region (also called Dixie), most of us would do the exact same thing to defend ourselves, our property, and our nation.}


Many days had passed since the occupation of Gerry. There were massive reports of detainment of anything that threatened the order or broke the C'Tan's laws, which were far fewer and more liberal than TurtleShroom's, but equally as enforced. It seemed they were making the city the base of their operations, and the military brass debated on if this was what they wanted, or if they were about to invade the rest of the nation.

They were getting tired and weary. Morale was low, but persistance was not. Over one million non-military creatures had been taken as prisoners of war. True, they were mostly either Zim Belters, general mobsters, or jungle guerillas, but this was getting extremely unnerving. Rumors of attacks on innocent hospitals and, as the most paranoid suggested, on prisons and churches, were spreading but never confirmed.

The military was powerless to head off to the location of the C'Tan. They had turned the entire western railroads into total rubble. Nothing could go in and out, and vehicles on dirt roads were inspected inside, outside, and in places that most wouldn't even think to look. This was effective to the point that the military simply stopped trying.

TurtleShroom had been blockaded from herself.

Centered around Gerry, this is where most of the action is. Black is Necron-controlled. Yellow is TurtleShroomian. If I were to zoom out and show the whole country...

They discussed what they were going to do and how, but came up with nothing. Some considered concription. Others thought of diplomacy. Some even considered giving up and surrendering with honor. -but no one in the de facto junta of soldiers had any clue on what to do next, if anything.

The last of the funds of TurtleShroom had finally gone dry. Within the next five days, the non-discretionary/non-allocated Defense Budget would be totally gone. By June, the non-discretionary/non-allocated Law and Order Budget would be out as well. These were the two non-discretionary funds authorized by statute to be used in invasion, unless DEFCON Zero was declared.
The current surviving rulers were too pure to cheat the DEFCON. Even though C'Tan was invading, they hadn't invaded the entire nation, or were about to. This was the requirement, and with the stalled battle, TurtleShroom even raised its DEFCON. Heck, there were plans for elections in the parts of TurtleShroom still under control of the actual nation. TurtleShroom was in limbo.


The Holy Republic of TurtleShroom's ragtag combinations of soldiers, militias, and volunteers defending their properties actually kept the C'Tan advancement far west of most of the population. They had successfully been contained in the northwest, and no city except Gerry had even been approached!
This was costly, though. Anything behind this metaphorical "curtain" was C'Tan's to take and reign. TurtleShroomers were fleeing in droves, hundreds of thousands at a time, from their land from C'Tan's control into what as left in TurtleShroom.

TurtleShroom and the Necrons had, amazingly, made a stalemate. What the C'Tan had in technology, the TurtleShroomers had in pure stubborness, fanaticism, boldness, and lots and lots of weaponry. C'Tan had lost less than five thousand of its creatures, and the TurtleShroomers over a million. (Most of these were captured guerillas from the Zim Belt and the other general rogues. About six thousand TurtleShroomian soldiers had become POWs/MIAs.)


If this war didn't end by June, though, TurtleShroom would be backed into the corner. TurtleShroom could not enter debt without authorization by Congress, and because there is not a Congress, the country, once hitting zero, would be done, according to the Constitution.

When this was over, everyone agreed that major continuity Amendments to the obviously flawed succession stipulations of the founding document would be immediate priorities.

[Comrade Commisar]

The High Priestless listened quietly to Lady Cyash's speech, just as she had listened to hers, although many of the High Priestess's assistants assumed that Lady Cyash probably ignored a large portion of the Priestess's rantings...

"Heh," The High Priestess laughed a little after the Necron's speech, quickly apologizing afterward, "So such is the word of the Necron species. I apologize for any misinformation that may have been presented, I'll quickly send word to the Imperial Archives to redocument your claims. Although, I must say, I am High Priestess Mei Bai-Ying of Nanchang, and Mei-Li Yue is the High Priestess of Yoitsu. I apologize for any confusion. Do not worry, I shall relay your words to the Turtleshroomian Government personally, for I can see we all wish for this conflict to end relatively quickly."

"Although I must say," Mei Bai-Ying spoke a more serious tone, "Comparing us to the Kheks is quite a dishonorable title, Royarch Cyash. I have fought most of my life to protect the Yue People from the Desert Scorpion, it would be most preferable if you refrain from comparing our purity with the underhandedness of the Kheks. Besides, 'cheap parlour tricks', do not send thousands of men towards their deaths, they do not eliminate entire divisions of steel monsters and the most dire of men. The many lost souls of tens of thousands of Kheks can tell you that in the afterlife."

"Worry not, we shall not attempt to prolong bloodshed and occupy the South Lands violently, as such would only disturb the balance." The High Priestess noted, "The South Landers within Kame no Tochi do have quite the will power not seen within ages, after all. Very well, I shall be bound for Jonesboro next, to hopefully discuss terms of peace. If we should invoke violence within the South Lands, you shall know of their answer. Farewell, Royarch Cyash, you have been most hospitable, perhaps one day we shall meet again to return such hospitality." She and her assistants bowed deeply before making their way towards the exit.

"On a final note, however," Spoke Mei Bai-Ying before she left the building, "I'm sure you will be pleased to know that according to the Imperial Archives, the final Harvest of Darkness conspirator was supposedly eaten by our High Advisor, Lang Lang Ōkami - the Great Wolf of the North Lands. I just thought that information would bring some piece of mind towards your operations here, 'tis all."

Therefore, the High Priestess and her entourage left the town of Gerry, bound for the Turtleshroomian Capital of Jonesboro...

[The Ctan]

Occupied Gerry

“It is a shame that his death was so quick,” Cyash said, “good day to you, High Priestess.”

As the Yue priests went south in occupied turtleshroom they exited what the necrons called the Box. The Box was the region of Turtleshroom around Gerry, that was like a large rectangle of land connected in only one part to the rest of the country. The Necrons were building a huge fortification, a vast wall, built as necron geomancers unleashing mysterious technological powers to reshape the land, and blocks of a material that looked like steel, but was stronger by far.

In all it was a smaller version of the wall being built on the C'tan-Turtleshroom Border

The necrontyr were eager to bring their knowledge to the denizens of Gerry, and free healthcare clinics were operating day or night. The Necrontyr had brought socialized medicine to Turtleshroomian soil! Some of the C'tani's closest allies didn't think much of the notion, but the C'tani were keen on fully free at point of service systems.

As well as this, they'd brought a Death Panel of civil servants, taking over a building devoted to the cause of preventing drug trafficiking and labelling it the Death Panel Headquarters. Of course, in this case, it was reviewing the cases of those executed in the city's juristiction and pardoning them officially, having their remains disinterred and reburied in C'tani soil, for the most part.

C'tani humans had taken over most of the schools, too.

There was lots of new construction going on, as though the necrons wanted to make the city over in their own image, though not all were getting to enjoy this...

Not everyone was enjoying the prosperity though, as they passed, there were rows upon rows of humans in pillories and turtles on posts, mushrooms suck in heaps of tyres that held their stalks, these were the local police, the local fire service, and anyone who'd spoken out against the necron invasion, or rather anyone who'd spoken 'hate speech' deemed as serious speech denigrating any given race, including Nekos. Every police-creature who had ever given a neko a rough time was having one themselves now, and it seemed like the necrons were willing to believe any story of persecution that they were told.

The fire department was there because the necrontyr had heard that they had turned their hoses on a protest at some point in the past; “There is no excuse for this racist behaviour”, the robotic judge had said from his mobile pulpit, “take them to the shame-poles.”

They weren't the only ones, teachers were out there, too, sweating and moaning imprisoned on shame-poles or stocks, anyone who'd taught hatred toward nekos. Bus drivers and mass transit personnel who'd enforced segregation policies! Swimming team captains who'd refused to let nekos into their teams, and other

The Necrons didn't really think this was really compatible with their concepts of free speech, but they were there to make restorative justice on the occupied settlement. The nekos and other races had been put down for so long that a lesson had, according to Assistant Secretary Jack Snipe, be administered to the ruling class. Things were different now; anyone who tried to keep the neko down, out in the stocks, or on a post, as it happened.

Any manager or business owner who'd provably discriminated against non-human, non-shroom, non-turtle applicants went out on the shame-poles too, thousands had been rounded up, making a true spectacle of groaning humanity and creatures, necron warriors patrolling this way and that along with highway, occasionally a sponge was dipped in water and held out for them, and they were forced to spend the nights in armoured stockades, shot on sight if they tried to leave; many were sentenced to over a week of pillory!

The Hawses were back, too, on Turtleshroomian territory, in Gerry a few hawses had returned, taking back businesses that had been closed since the Dark Harvest, though each had a necron warrior on hand to deal with any issues. And it wasn't just the Hawses, either, other strange non-humans seemed to come with the necrons, from elves, to frightening beings of every type.

One type of alien took all the Turtleshroomian judges and lawyers who had presided over or prosecuted racist trials where justice had been compromised by racism. They were themselves tried, this time rather more impartially, and those convicted were sentanced to 'death by parasite' as was apparently the custom for racist criminals; this would work on the humans and the turtles, at least, no one was sure about the mushrooms. They were taken from the Earth entirely, and slain. When questions were asked of where these racists had been taken the necrons would answer “they have been taken to the Tomb of Nixon.” The truth was more disturbing, for long ago, several American, or as the Turtleshroomians would have it, Yankeelandian, Republican Presidents' remains had been moved to the C'tan from one of the several Americas that had briefly fallen to Communism, and although their actual tombs were regularly Christian by the appropriate denomination, they were near to massive mortuary complexes where ancient rites accorded to ancient kings and Pharaohs were undertaken in their names; to Reagan were sacrificed the Communist troika members and mental-hospital doctors captured by the C'tani, to Eisenhower, the Fascist Commandants and torturers, and to Nixon, the racist judge and lawyer were offered, not really for any religious purpose, but more because it was deemed amusingly appropriate, in this case as a hero of civil rights, though most histories didn't mention him, the C'tani thought rather highly of this politician. Abraham Lincoln had a huge mausoleum too, though his body was in Menelmacar, unsurprisingly, slavers went to that temple site, but did not return.

Churches were left strictly alone, with one exception; the C'tani were preparing to tax the city, and let it be known that any church-owned building that was not either a graveyard or the actual house of worship would be taxed, unless it was distinctly charitable; parochial houses and church halls would be taxed on the C'tani's land tax!

Cyash stood in the Town Square, with her guards, long warstaves snapping to attention, as a shuttle landed, its engines blackening and cracking the stone beneath it. A group of six senate guards, humans in deep purple, disembarked the shuttle.

“Assistant Secretary!” she said.

“No longer,” Snipe said. “I am to be addressed as the Lord-Governor of Turtleshroom henceforth.”

[TurtleShroom]

{OOC: AAAAAAAGH I LOST ALL OF MY STINKING WORK I AM GOING TO PUNCH A WALL -...... We're sorry. The previous post was erased and I lost all of my work. This version will not be as good as my original one... again.}

{OOC: C’Tan, there already IS a wall in Gerry. Look here:

[Gerry's] Main Street stops at an amazing site: a twelve-story concrete wall with a large military-looking checkpoint in an arch that Main Street goes under and out. Smog conceals the top of the wall, so you can't actually see over it. That wall was built because of the wave of illegal immigrants that always go through Gerry [across the national border]. The entire [international] border, from the start of Gerry's city limits border-side, to the end on each side of said limits, have the Wall on the border.

}


The C’Tan had made several mistakes in their attempts to “fix” Gerry in their image. The first and biggest was the quotas where catgirls were promoted.

Gerry’s open adoration and praise of crime and corruption, coupled with the entire nation’s extremely popular “John Raven Codes”, now going from urban centers into suburbs, were recipes for a disaster: unemployed catgirls were encouraged to go into crime and to love doing it.

Nekomimi did one of four things in TS: 1) form their own companies, towns, and lives with their own kind in isolation, or 2) go to Gerry and become female pimps, Mafia-made (wo)men, prostitutes, drug ladies, and other extremely skilled thieves and deceitful beings, or 3) eek out a living in a segregated city (maybe in a minimum wage job), or 4) work for a farmer or farm co-op.


Now given the full reigns of power and never again suspect to the TurtleShroomian national government “purges” of the city government, the nekomimi relished and abused their newfound power. Many still had loyalties to “the family” or their drug cartels. Most were still as corrupt as Chicago.

The C’Tan was astounded as every crime from mailbox attacks to murder doubled, tripled and even quadrupled. The Future-Tech tyrants that served as police were occupied day and night, night and day. For every crime they stopped, the mob and drug cartels formed two more. Criminals went into Gerry en masse and overwhelmed even the Necrontyr forces. This was not because they had more tech or were better, but because there was so many of them!

Necrontyr grants to the Lord-Commander's new neko cronies vanished faster than they arrived. Embezzlement drained most of the funds in a week, and the Neko officers were far more brutal in discrimination and corruption than their human counterparts. This was because the Gerry natives were bathed in crime and evil since they arrived.

The C’Tan fought long and hard to fight this shocker of a discovery, but refused to admit their mistake in the neko decisions.

What annoyed them most, though, was not that they were actually having to engage a War on Crime with these petty syndicates, but with the store owners, the police, the officials, both criminal and corrupt, and also a little bit pure, routinely mocked the C’Tan from the pillories, stockades, and poles.

"TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO!"

This was naturally met with punishment, often times painful, but they didn’t care.

“TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO! TOLD YOU SO!”


As the very scant few good creatures fled Gerry, many times the criminals entered. The borders were clogged with creatures running in and out. The churches and missions were looted first, government buildings second. Burnings occurred. Mass scale looting followed as Gerry became an even greater free-for-all than before.

The Necrons were up to their gills in rampant lawlessness. They easily disposed of these criminals, but they kept coming like cockroaches. The deaths and injuries on the criminal element were loading up fast, but no Necrontyr fighter was even scratched.

That’s when the fires started. It was very suspicious. The C’Tan would have stopped any punk with a lighter. Even a higher mobster tasked with arson might have been caught.
This fire was too professionally done to be a petty crook or a low mobster. It was either an actual Mafia Capo, an Underboss, or worst of all, the TurtleShroomian government.

After all, why wasn’t TurtleShroom stopping all of these stampeding criminals from entering Gerry? Where was the cooperation? Where was the assistance?

That was the point.
TurtleShroom was actually encouraging criminal emigration into what the citizenry was beginning to call “The Blight”.
Using the massively depleting budgets as excuses, TurtleShroom’s most secure prisons were starting to be thinned out. Prison transport busses “mysteriously” broke down en route, and Death Row criminals, high-profile crooks, and the absolute most evil beings fled into the deserts, the swamps, and the jungles.
How did they get in Gerry?
This is where the elite police forces and spies played a part. Moles and double agents in the TS Mafia and in the drug cartels would “suggest” going to Gerry, and share details on crime outpacing C’Tan police forces: “Go and do anything you want, before they call in re-enforcements!”

-and all the while, the city burned as criminals paraded in. When the Necrontyr occupiers weren’t putting out fires, they were busting drug rings and organized crime. When they weren’t fighting organized crime, they were solving murders, and when they weren’t solving murders, they were punishing the very nekomimi they appointed to run the city for being corrupt.

The socialized medicine clinics were even worse. All the good creatures fled as the Necrons advanced. Those left didn’t take the Hippocratic Oath, and they certainly weren’t Boy Scouts in the ethics department.
Clinics that did not have C’Tani staff became hubs for cooking methamphetamine and all sorts of nasty concoctions. The Mafia even used it as a means of making enemies “disappear”. C’Tani clinics left to the Gerry goons were filthy and disease-ridden.

The clinics run by the Necron people were bad, but in a different sort of way. No illicit drugs were processed here, and the place was clean enough that one could dine off the floors. Medical equipment centuries ahead of TS adorned the walls and buildings, and they were, unquestionably, top notch in their abilities.

There was one catch, though: most of the diseases that were treated were STDs, food poisoning, and obviously intentional “goods” injected into enemy mobsters. Well, STDs for the most part. Three out of ten of the patients either were or still were promiscuous or actual harlots. Dozens more came asking for abortions.
In fact, that was another problem. Otherwise law-abiding, but slutty, human denizens of TS flocked to Gerry to get abortions. Believing the narrative that the C’Tan were raw, unadulterated evil, humans seeking abortions took miles and miles of sleazy bus rides (charging fares hundreds of times higher) to the heck hole of C’Tani Gerry to risk their lives to kill another. Most of the humans seeking abortions were killed by the criminals of the cities.

Those that died angered the creatures back home. Those that made it back angered the creatures back home. Those that didn’t get abortions but thought they could in Gerry angered the creatures back home. No matter whether they got it or not, the very rumor that C’Tani clinics offered free, elective abortions drove the populace mad.


Rumors spread through the country by radio, by television, by telegraph, mail, and word of mouth. Everything from pure truth to outright naïve fabrication shook the nation by storm. The C’Tan rapidly became hated by most of the population.

TurtleShroom was radicalizing itself more and more and more with every passing day, with every human seeking an abortion, with every square inch of flame and every racist put into the stockades. As good creatures fled Gerry, they told tales of what they saw going in, and the whole nation was shaken in fear, shock, and disgust.


The remaining government of the rest of TurtleShroom took advantage of this and sneaked condemnations of the Necrons into every speech, broadcast, and suggestion. School boards began adding a skewed version of C’Tani occupation of Gerry into their textbooks, and children were told that “a Necron would tie them to a poll in Gerry” if they didn’t behave.

Behind closed doors, theologians re-analyzed the Necrontyr race. They tried to be impartial, but they heard the rumors and the facts combined, and began to think that C’Tan was allowing the criminals to do what they did in Gerry.
(Of course, it was the opposite. The overwhelmed Necrons were actually trying to stop it, but were outnumbered. Not that they knew that.)

Things were getting worse faster than one could say “things were getting worse”.

[TurtleShroom]

Whenever the C’Tan spoke outside of Gerry, insurgencies of Zim Belters and newly radicalized TurtleShroomers of all species swarmed in and attacked (and promptly were zapped to dust or kidnapped as POWs), screeching “REMEMBER GERRY!”.

“Remember Gerry.”
That was the motto of the hardliner militarists itching for a thermonuclear war on the C’Tan menace.

“Remember Gerry.”
That was the mantra of fiery pastors of all denominations, telling their Christian flocks to resist the claims that the C’Tan wanted anything good.

“Remember Gerry.”
That was the cry of the hoodlum-but-good-intending adolescent turtles, mushrooms, and humans that mike-checked C’Tan and TurtleShroomian meetings between the Necrons’ and the TurtleShroomers’ diplomats and ambassadors.

“Remember Gerry.”
That was the cry of Four Star Generals Tecumseh and Sherman Dukem as they burnt the peace treaty that amended Urmanian and C’Tan into the document that could have ended the war on national television.

“Remember Gerry.”
That was the catalyst of John Raven himself, hijacking the errors of a handful of catgirls to segregate the hundreds of thousands, possibly over a million, nekomimi into the back of the bus, into separate restaurants, on segregated train cars, in specialized schools, and in every aspect of TurtleShroomian life.

“Remember Gerry.”
That was one of the most popular platform pieces of candidates for Senator of the TurtleShroomian Congress, promising to implement the John Raven Codes unconditionally on a national scale.

“Remember Gerry.”
That was the call to arms and successful recruitment gimmick for lynch mobs, the TSKKK, jungle rebels, the Zim Belt, and even the actual Armed Forces of TurtleShroom.

“Remember Gerry.”
This phrase united everyone like never before. This phrase radicalized everyone like never before. The foundations of TurtleShroom were shaking. The C’Tan, whether they knew it or not, was corrupting the integrity and harmony of the nation.



The country was falling into depravity with two simple words.
Remember Gerry. Remember Gerry. Remember Gerry.

The Motor Madness Scandal was immediately tied to alleged C’Tan corruption. Fiery preachers and conmen blamed the C’Tan for everything wrong with the country.

Nut job conspirators eked out billions from convincing people that Necron weaponry and technology was corrupting and warping the minds of creatures without them knowing. Tin foil sales went through the roof, and the stocks of aluminum companies and tinfoil manufacturers made instant millionaires over night.


"Remember Gerry."

[TurtleShroom]

All of TurtleShroom cowered in fear, as their secular anchor, that pure spirit that defined the nation, seemed to be falling. Gerry was a blight on TurtleShroom. Everyone knew it.

However, TurtleShroom didn’t dare fight to cure this blight. The C’Tan were winning, in their eyes. God was, for some reason, granting these immoral monsters His hand. Was this to teach TurtleShroom a lesson?

Or, was it long-overdue punishment for the cheating that TurtleShroom border drawers performed generations ago, the very act that gave the city its name? Was this divine retribution for cheating “an unnamed anime nation” out of the richest uranium deposits to ever exist in TurtleShroom? What was to come of this? Where was God?


As May ticked on and the nation began to shatter further, a message was dispatched from the entire Executive Cabinet, cosigned by the Supreme Court, the Grand Alcoholic Tribunal, the Holy Marriage Tribunal, the military top brass, the TS Southern Baptist Convention, Jason Icfella, Cardinal of All TurtleShroomian Catholic Christendom, pastors and notable religious figures from Christian denominations the world over, and over two million citizens, seeking a C’Tan reply:

Code: Select all

HOLY REPUBLIC OF TURTLESHROOM
IN UNANIMOUS PLEA OF ALL THE BRANCHES OF GOVERNMENT, ALL OF THE CHRISTIAN CHURCH, TWO MILLION CITIZENS, AND THE MILITARY

NECRONTYR EMPIRE OF THE C’TAN:

GET OUT.
YOUR VERY PRESENCE AND TAKEOVER OF GERRY IS RIPPING OUR VERY BEING FROM OUR NATION.

GET OUT.
OUR PEOPLE ARE BECOMING MORE RESTLESS AND CORRUPT EVERY DAY.

GET OUT.
ALREADY, WE HAVE LOST OUR AUTOMOBILES, OUR ETHICS, AND OUR GOVERNMENT.

GET OUT.
YOU ARE A CANCER INFECTING US ALL. WE ARE FALLING APART AT THE SEEMS.

GET OUT.
WE ARE A DYING PEOPLE, MORALLY CRUMBLING AND BARELY CLINGING TO WHAT IS LEFT,

GET OUT.
WE NEVER POLICED OR TOOK ON GERRY BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE A PIÑATA, IF YOU BURST IT, ALL SORTS OF VICE AND EVIL WILL COME OUT.

GET OUT.
YOU ALLOWED THE CRIMINAL ELEMENT TO SEIZE POWER TO APPEASE SOME LIBERAL BLEEDING HEART QUOTA FOR NEKOMIMI. GERRY NEKOMIMI ARE NOT THE SAME CATGIRLS AS THOSE IN OTHER PARTS OF TURTLESHROOM. NOTHIN IS SACRED THERE.

GET OUT.
TENS OF THOUSANDS OF VIOLENT CRIMINALS ARE CAUSING CHAOS IN THE COUNTRYSIDE AS THEIR MARCH OF DEATH GUIDES THEM TO GERRY. WHOLE VILLAGES AND FARMS HAVE BEEN VACATED.

GET OUT.
OUR NATION IS IN DEBT FOR THE FIRST TIME IN CENTURIES, WE ARE OUT OF FUNDS, AND WE ARE HEADING FAST TO SOCIETAL COLLAPSE.

GET OUT.
OUR NATION IS AT THE BOILING POINT OF AN ALL-OUT RIOT. CITIZENS ARE TAKING UP AMRS, MILITIAS ARE PERFORMING DRILLS, AND MILITARY RECRUITMENT IS RISING.

GET OUT.
THE CITIZENRY CAN NOT TAKE MUCH LONGER OF YOUR IMMORALITY AND VICE. YOUR PEOPLE HAVE ENSLAVED MILLIONS OF OURS, KILLING THEM IN DROVES {OOC: This is about the kidnapping POW thing, they think you’re killing them.} AND, RUMOR HAS IT, PARADING THEM IN FRONT OF PONIES AS THEY GET PELTED WITH PAINFUL PROJECTILES AND STARVED IN CELLS, WHILE THE TURTLES GIVE RIDES TO THEIR NEW MASTERS.

GET OUT.
YOU ARE THE WORST THING TO EVER HAPPEN TO TURTLESHROOM.

GET OUT.
IF YOU DO NOT, WE WILL USE EVERYTHING WE HAVE LEFT TO GET YOU OUT. WE WILL CONSCRIPT EVERY ABLE BODIED CREATURE. WE WILL LAUNCH EVERY NUCLEAR WEAPON. WE WILL RAIN DOWN EVERYTHING WE HAVE ON YOUR EVIL, HEARTLESS, MERCILESS, OVERPOWERED, ARROGANT, VILLANIOUS SCUM OF A POPULACE.

GET OUT.
WE ARE READY TO DIE AND CEASE TO EXIST AS A NATION AND A PEOPLE TO STOP YOU, AND NOTHING WILL END OUR STRUGGLE UNTIL YOU BURN GERRY TO THE GROUND, SALT IT, AND GET INTO YOUR UFOS AND OPEN A DIMENSION TO RE-ENTER THE PITS OF SULFUR FROM WHICH YOU ROSE OUT TO TORMENT ALL THAT IS RIGHT.

GET OUT.
ALL CREATURES GREAT AND SMALL ARE READY TO DIE FOR WHAT LITTLE OF TURTLESHROOM IS LEFT WITHIN US.


YOU HAVE TAKEN OUR COUNTRY. YOU HAVE TAKEN OUR PURITY. YOU HAVE TAXED OUR GOD AND TORMENTED OUR PEOPLE. YOU HAVE LEGALIZED ABORTION AND HOMOSEXUAL CONDUCT AND HAVE PERVERTED THE HEALTHCARE SYSTEM. YOU HAVE COLLAPSED OUR PEOPLE AND STALLED ELECTIONS. YOU HAVE RAIDED PRISONS, MENTAL HOSPITALS, CHURCHES, AND INNOCENTS. YOU HAVE LEFT THE BLOOD OF OVER ONE MILLION TURTLESHROOMERS ON YOUR FILTHY CLAWS.

IF YOU DO NOT GET OUT, WE WILL FIGHT TO THE VERY LAST BREATH, THE LAST HUMAN, THE LAST TURTLE, THE LAST MUSHROOM, UNTIL YOU NEVER SET FOOT ON TURTLESHROOM AGAIN.



MANY HAVE RISEN AGAINST THE NECRONTYR EMPIRE, AND ALL OF THEM NOW MAKE NIFTY ARTIFACTS IN YOUR MUSEUMS.

MAY THE ARTIFACTS OF THE HOLY REPUBLIC OF TURTLESHROOM STRIKE A TWINGE OF FEAR IN EVERY GENERATION OF YOUR SPAWN; MAY TURTLESHROOM GO DOWN IN HISTORY AS THE ONLY NATION THAT DID NOT CAPITULATE TO YOUR DISGRACES TO LIFE AND TO GOD.


IF THIS IS THE END OF TURTLESHROOM, LET ALL MEN, ALL CREATURES, THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE KNOW THAT WE DREW A LINE IN THE SAND.
WE STOOD FOR OUR GOD. WE STOOD FOR WHAT IS RIGHT.
IF WE DO NOT SURVIVE, WE WILL AT LEAST BE IN PARIDISE.
IF YOU DO NOT GET OUT THERE WILL BE NO CESSATION.

-AND WHEN TURTLESHROOM IS BUT A PAGE IN HISTORY BOOKS AND THE NATION IS A SEA OF GLASS, THE SURVIVING DESCENDENTS OF OUR ONCE PROUD NATION WILL TAKE UP THEIR CROSS AND FIGHT THE ABOMINATION OF THE NECRONTYR EMPIRE. THE CHILDREN OF EXILED TURTLESHROOMERS IN FOREIGN LANDS WILL RETURN TO DESTROY YOU.

THE ENTIRE POPULACE WILL THROW OFF YOUR CHAINS OF SATAN IN THIS LAND AS IT BECOMES OCCUPIED, AND WE WILL NEVER BOW TO YOUR LAW, YOUR PEOPLE, OR YOUR RULE.

EVEN AFTER YOU THINK WE’RE GONE, WE WILL RETURN. WE WILL STOP AT NOTHING TO DESTROY YOU.

LEST YOU NOT DEPART, THEN GOD HAVE MERCY ON US ALL.


WE HAVE TURNED THE OTHER CHEEK ENOUGH. WE HAVE TRIED TO LET YOU HAVE GERRY. WE EVEN GAVE YOU ALL THE DEVIL HORSES. EVERYTHING WE HAVE DONE FOR PEACE YIELDED MORE WAR, MORE OCCUPATION, AND MORE KILLED TURTLESHROOMERS. EVERYTHING WE HAVE DONE FOR WAR HAS CREATED FURTHER DESOLATION.

IF YOU DO NOT DEPART, WE WILL DECLARE A HOLY CRUSADE AGAINST THE NECRONTYR EMPIRE. WE WILL FIGHT TO THE LAST BREATH TO EXPEL YOU FROM OUR LANDS.


WE WILL SAY IT ONE TIME. WE ARE READY TO DIE. GET OUT, OR WE WILL BE THE GREATEST HEADACHE YOUR RACE HAS EVER HAD TO FIGHT. WE ARE NOT JUST A RESISTING FORCE. WE ARE CRUSADERS, BOUND TOGETHER BY THE CROSS OF THE LORD JESUS, AND READY TO BE SENT TO PARIDISE IF PUSH COMES TO SHOVE. WE DO NOT FEAR DEATH. WE WILL FIGHT TO THE END.

YOU HAVE FORTY EIGHT HOURS TO RESPOND TO OUR MESSAGE.

FAILURE TO EXIT AT THIS REQUEST WILL INVOKE ONE FINAL SUMMIT OF DIPLOMATS TO CONVINCE YOU TO LEAVE, OR TO COBBLE FORTH SOME SORT OF PEACE, ANY KIND OF PEACE THAT GETS YOU OUT OF HERE.

THE BIBLE SAYS TO GIVE TWO WARNINGS BEFORE BEGINNING. YOUR FIRST WARNING IS THIS LETTER. YOUR SECOND WARNING WILL BE THE SUMMITS.

WE WILL NOT GO TO WAR WITHOUT CAUSE. LEAVE OUR LANDS AND NEVER COME BACK, OR WE WILL BEGIN OUR CRUSADE AGAINST YOU, AND AS SURELY AS THE LORD LIVES, WE PROMISE YOU THAT TURTLESHROOM’S CRUSADE WILL PLAGUE YOU UNTIL JESUS CHRIST HIMSELF RETURNS FROM HEAVEN.

YOU WILL NEVER AGAIN KNOW TRUE PEACE. OUR CRUSADE WILL BE ENDLESS, RELENTLESS, AND PERPETUAL. WE WILL FIGHT WITH STICKS, STONES, FISTS, AND WORDS. NOTHING WILL STOP TURTLESHROOM FROM DEFENDING GOD.


SO WE SAY IT ONE MORE TIME. GET OUT.


SIGNED,
-ALL OF US

[TurtleShroom]

(Image)
(Image)

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE. INTERRUPT ALL TELEVISION, RADIO, AND BROADCAST TRANSMISSION FOR IMMEDIATE BROADCAST. SOUND ALL ALARMS.

[align=CENTER]THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
REPEAT!
THIS IS NOT A DRILL!

TurtleShroom is collapsing and the people are restless. The Zim Belters have stopped opposing the C'Tan and vanished back into the forests, many seen heading to the cities. None have been arrested thus far.

Facing no end in sight, TurtleShroom's entire government, the signatures of two million TurtleShroomian citizens, the military, and the Church across most every denomination have released an ultimatum to the C'Tani government.

They warned the occupying forces, which have been invading and remaining in the country in a stalemate since the start of 2012, that TurtleShroom would give C'Tan a Biblically ordered "two last chances" ultimatum.
The first, claims the article, is a simple request to exit. The second, it says, is a diplomatic meeting with the goal of getting the C'Tan to exit the nation.


The letter is supported by over eighty five percent of surveyed TurtleShroomers. Already, millions of TurtleShroomers have been reported as arming themsevles to the teeth, or joining the military.
This is where the seriousness of TurtleShroom's situation comes.

They are calling this war a "Crusade". The letter and those surveyed agree that the C'Tan are corrupting everything in the country by existing within them. The letter says that their failure to leave will trigger a total state of war against the two peoples, and TurtleShroom expects to lose.

Our sources have reported that this Crusade is planned as a fight to the death. All able-bodied male creatures and mushrooms, if the C'Tan does not exit, will be drafted into the Army branch of the military. Conscientious objectors and pacifists will be given non-combat support roles and vital positions to carry the war effort.

The battlefield maps and plans for the Crusade are classified, but sources say it is relentless and already prepared for execution.
The DEFCON has been lowered to one, and the nation is on the eve of total warfare.
No one apparently fears their death. This seems to be a benefit of the TurtleShroomer's unwavering faith, and the reason this is a "Crusade".

TurtleShroom does not expect to defeat the C'Tan in combat. They expect to lose, just as entire planets lost to the Necrontyr Empire before them. TurtleShroom's letter claims that the point is not to win, but finally stand up against what they call "a merciless unchecked agent of Satan that has never seen a true fight".


All able-bodied males and mushrooms are to pick up their Selective Service Card and their ID Badge and report to their nearest Recruitment Office for immediate induction and training into the Armed Forces of TurtleShroom.

All females without offspring and conscientious objectors, clergymen, pacifists, the physically disabled, and other non-fighters are to report to their nearest Chaplaincy at their local military installation for immediate induction into non-combat roles, non-violent/fighting positions, and vital support for the war effort in all fields, and, for clerics, for the chaplaincy.

All mental paitients, Endermen of Ende, mothers, all offspring under the age of majority, tourists, vital support staff designated by their Selective Service Card, elected and top-ranked governmental officials, potential heirs to the Chancellery, surviving Regents, mentally impaired beings, foreign guests, and foreign representatives are to report to their nearest railroad stations to be evacuated to the Grand Bunkers.

Anything not mentioned in these categories are to report to the nearest police station for determination of categorization and possible conscription.


THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

[Comrade Commisar]

Jonesboro, Turtleshroom

High Priestess Mei Bai-Ying and her escort arrived at Jonesboro, just in time to watch as the city was crying in arms against the Necron occupation. Looking around, she noticed houses and shops littered with the words, 'Remember Gerry'. Looking further into it, neighborhoods, districts, even the government chanted those words. Looking at one of the many 'electronic boxes' through a window pane, Mei Bai-Ying heard of talk of conscription, and sighed a deep sigh.

"If these South Landers continue this, the Imperial Shrine may have to get involved..." She muttered as she made her way towards the main governing building of Turtleshroom.

There, she and her party witnessed many government officials packing their belongings and rushing towards their respected vehicles. Grabbing one of the lower-tier politicians making their way out of the building, the High Priestess wished to know what was happening, which see was met with a breathless reply.

"I'm sorry your grace, but we are on Defcon one. Excuse me, I have to get to the train station quickly..." He said as he quickly ran to his vehicle with many documents.

The High Priestess simply looked around as the city quickly dissolved into a series of fear, bravery, and patriotism. Silently observing as the recruitment centers were overstocked with conscripts, as the streets became polluted with vehicles of all types, as train stations had trouble getting enough trains to evacuate the city...

"High Priestess Mei Bai-Ying," A Priestess stated, waking her from her daydream, "What is our course of action, High Priestess?"
"Of course," The High Priestess stated, turning back to her party, "Contact the Imperial Shrine and tell them of the events occuring here, also arrange for one of the Treasure Ships of the North Lands to arrive at Turtleshroom for our evacuation. We shall be playing no part in their hopeless 'Crusade'."
"Yes, High Priestess... and of the prisoners?" The Priestess said as she pointed towards a line of barely breathing criminals who appeared to be flash-fried, although alive by some unknown method.
"Have them sent to Jianyu Ba," Stated the High Priestess as she ordered the party to change their destination to Litlin, "Let them rot in the icy confines of the North Lands. Make them atone for the errors of their ways."

Nodding, the party continued on, with the assistants dragging the prisoners by rope towards Litlin, the many sharp blades to their backs motivation to keep moving. The Priestess looked at Mei Bai-Ying, and although blank faced, the High Priestess could tell of her worry.
"There is nothing we can do for these people anymore," She spoke a sorrowful tone, "They have decided their own fate and will die by it. Come, let us go to Litlin, then to one of Turtleshroom's harbors to leave this country."
"Yes, High Priestess," The young woman said as she followed the party alongside Mei.

[The Ctan]

A BROADCAST TO ALL THE CREATURES OF TURTLESHROOM

By Ranisath, Elenaran of the C'tan Empire

Across the nation, TV sets were interrupted with a powerful signal. It showed an luxurious beach-house, with people, elves and ponies, sat around a coffee-table, three tiny turtles sat on the elf lady's lap, held on a large fluffy and warm looking towel. The elf lord, dark haired, ruggedly handsome in a way no Turtleshroomer could ever dream of being, looked to the camera.

“Hi there. I'm Ranisath nos Fëanor, Supreme Overlord of the Necrontyr Dynasties. These are my wife Sirithil nos Fëanor, Elentári of Menelmacar, and my friends Twilight Sparkle and Morning Star, of the Greater Pony Herd. And these cute little fellows are Mary, Luchia and Simon,” he said, looking at the little turtles, each only about six inches long; little more than hatchlings. They looked very, very happy, sunning themselves in the tropical heat; they obviously hadn't been mistreated, happily out of their shells and moving around confidently. Sirithil, petting them lightly, sat, with a plate of strawberries, holding one out for Simon to eat. The hatchling ate enthusiastically, looking incredibly happy. “Don't worry, I won't spoil them,” Sirithil said, “they're eating properly.”

The trick was to keep people watching; most of the audience would be expecting something horrible to be done to the turtles, and thus mesmerised and fascinated.

“I want to talk to you today about what exactly we're doing in Turtleshroom, and why,” he said, “as everyone knows, Turtleshroom got scared by the ponies.”

“As if we're scary!” Twilight laughed, before leaning down and playing peek-a-boo with one of the tortoises, quite happily.

“We’d never hurt anyone who didn’t hurt us or others first!” Morning Star said.

“See, I can sort of understand, new, unknown, magical, and really very smart,” Ranisath said, “and you got rid of the Dark Harvest, under duress, which is still impressive. Then, so the story goes, we mean Necrontyr started being mean for no reason,” he said.

“The thing is,” Morning Star said, “when we got the ponies, we found out they'd all been quite badly handled, which wasn't what had been agreed to. So we told the Necrontyr.”

“We didn't like that; you back out of a deal; the deal is off, so we attacked. It's that simple; keep your word, and be at peace, and everything works out,” Ranisath said. “Break your word to us, and we get unhappy! But then, when the dust settled, we left; ponies out, job done, all was good, as it went; a ceasefire, de-facto, if not agreed. We could live with that, our business was over.”

“Ack!” Twilight said, as one of the hatchlings, Mary, chomped experimentally on her violet mane, and she leaned over to accommodate the curious creature. Sirithil looked like she was trying not to laugh. This clearly wasn't recorded with great rehearsal, and might even be live.

“So then Turtleshroom wanted to make peace.” Ranisath said.

“Brilliant!” Morning Star said.

“We love peace!” Twilight said, trying to wait out the hatchling nomming her mane.

“The problem was, they weren't offering peace for all, they were pretty much declaring that they wanted a state of war to exist with our allies,” Ranisath said. “We don't like people who want to hurt our friends.”

Morning Star promptly jumped up onto Ranisath, and the C'tani hugged the grey pony. “We really don't like it either,” Morning Star said.

“So, we hatched a plan. And it's time Turtleshroom found out about our plan.”

“Play the tape,” Twilight said, as Siri tried to disentangle her too, both not wanting to hurt the rather stubborn tortoise.

__ __ __

The broadcast switched to a series of interviews with humans, mushrooms and turtles in their prisoner of war camps, none of them gave the impression that what was going on was good, but interviews and vox-pops of pastors and priests also attested to the relatively civilized treatment, though the tortoises especially complained.

“You would not believe how much a hawse weighs!” one complained, “The winged hawses weigh less, but they're actually really heavy. Get me outta here!”

A terrible image of the turtle-prisons' fairground, where Rainbow Dash, among other ponies, including a red pegasus astute observers might recognise as one Knight-Captain Firewing from Crystal Spires, elves, humans, and weirder creatures rode around on their backs. Rainbow Dash the pony who'd been featured in the popular-in-Turtleshroom first edition of 'Cupcakes' seemed to be enjoying her revenge.

__ __ __

The video came back to the resort, Mary now climbing up Twilight's mane, little legs pulling her up the pony's side. As she at last clambered up onto Twilight’s back, Ranisath scooped the hatchling up by her shell carefully and passed her back to his wife. “So here’s the deal,” Ranisath said, “Every one of those Turtleshroomers raised arms against us, in the war their government refused to end. We have not harmed or taken any civilians captive. Those are all prisoners of war. As long as Turtleshroom is at war with the Necrontyr Empire, they do not come home. When peace is made, they come home. Simple as that. It’s alright, we’re making sure that they are segregated by gender,” he said, “no one will be born into the camps - in case you’re wondering these adorable hatchlings, and some spores - Mushrooms don’t take well to Menelmacari weather, it’s very warm here, but they’re safe and being looked after, don’t worry - and babies, were rescued out of Zim Belt settlements affected by the Orbtial Friendship Cannon, as you see they’re better now!” he said, as Sirithil let Simon nibble on a courgette.

“Peace with the Necrontyr Empire requires peace with the Greater Pony Herd.

“And right now, we’d be happy to offer that, if that was all it was, but since we invaded, we found out about the nekos, and the Raven laws. These things,” Ranisath said, “are affronts to freedom,” he said, “freedom is only secured by the equality of all persons before the law, and only equality before the law secures freedom.”

“It is the Revealed Law of Ilúvatar that we seek no harm to one another save in the defence of one’s self or others.” Sirithil said, “but in all other matters we are free to each govern ourselves as we please. When you persecute a minority you betray this most Law of God.” Sirithil frowned, the achingly beautiful, crimson-eyed elf just looking disappointedly at the camera.

“And then there’s the issue of the mental hospitals,” Twilight said, “I believe strongly in caring for the sick, but that’s not what you creatures are doing, you’re using them as vile prisons for the mind of anyone who imagines beyond the plaid universe you would live in, and shut any free-thought away.”

Ranisath nodded, “Don’t get us wrong, we don’t care if you want to live in your chosen lifestyle; that is your right; we will support that. But when you take away the rights of others, you degrade yourself, creating a society in which the wisdom and protection of Natural Law is not a given person’s legal right, then it becomes no one’s legal right; if you allow government to oppress one group, then you allow the government and brutes like John Raven, to take the rights from anyone and none of you are guaranteed freedom. No man can be fully free while his neighbor is not. It simply does not work, it never works, it never will.

“And that is why we have acted against your mental hospitals, and why we have gone to the city of Gerry....” he said, “it seems however, that the Turtleshroom government is doing its level best to make sure the city burns, literally and figuratively.”

“Happily,” Twilight said, beaming, “We have an answer for that.”

“You’re not going to like this bit,” Morning Star said with a rather more malicious smile.

“You see.. the Orbital Friendship Cannon...” Ranisath said, “was in part intended by the Greater Pony Herd for just this kind of occasion. Riot control.”

“As I speak, the last C’tani humans are have confirmed out of Gerry, leaving only necrons among the C’tani forces there. Twilight.”

The purple pony got up, lifting a hoof, pressing a button. “Commander, this is the Alpha. Prepare the Lunar Friendship Cannon... Target the city of Gerry Turtleshroom. Saturation-Pacification power.”

“As you wish M’lady.”

__ __ __

The image switched to a distant image of the city of Gerry. It panned up, showing the moon, suddenly glowing. Somehow, the Necrons had altered the Moon Cannon to serve their ends! Perhaps using parts of the original Orbital Friendship Cannon, or new ones from the Greater Pony Herd. Whatever it was, though, it was devastating, a rainbow coloured beam of light filling the sky, bathing the city in light, a shriek of discordant music lashing as the entire city was blasted, and miles around it, everyone in it reduced, for the next week or so, to a hugging zombie. Only Cyash and her necrons, being machines, would be immune to its mind control.

A tidal wave of pink light shot out across the plains around the city.

__ __ __

“We have taken your moon cannon,” Morning Star said, “now behold what it can do between our magic and necron technology...” he said.

“We are willing to talk peace,” Twilight said, looking to the camera as it came back, “but unless you would like to feel more of the Lunar Friendship Cannon, you had best reconsider this ‘crusade’ idea.”

“We will negotiate with you, name a time and a place,” Ranisath said.

Twilight Sparkle went back to playing with the hatchlings, ears flattening back as she pretended to be a turtle herself.

OOC: GPH characters with permission and input from the player via IRC.