An Exploration Mission (Closed; Att'n Vallermoore)

[Victorious Decepticons]

The three Megatronists credited the Decepticon Way for their freedom, stating that they would surely have been sent to a "mental hospital" if found out. The supposed mental hospital, according to them, was actually a brainwashing center that wouldn't let anyone out until they agreed with the Autobot Way. Since they were staunch Megatronists, this would effectively be a life sentence.

Two of them decided to go for the Ultimate Upgrade, but the third - a sapient pony - revealed that he wanted to remain biological. This one really enjoyed the sensations of being biological, from the feeling of grass or gravel under his hooves to more...carnal...forms of pleasure, and he didn't want to give that up.

Carjack heard this, and said, "You won't be saying that when you're old. That's when your body will start crashing and sending your brain constant pain signals from a variety of parts. And we'll just laugh and say 'told ya so.' Are you sure you want to keep that doomed pile of junk?!?"

The pony was indeed certain, so he was sent to a relatively safe biological world as the looting of his original planet continued. The other two Megatronists were taken to the Immigration Office on Cybertron for the paperwork part of their testing. After that, they would have to pass the survival test on Earth...

[Vallermoore]

The two Megatronists marvelled at their first site of the Big Ball Bearing in the Sky, which was a common nickname of the infamous Metal Planet. They were in the cockpit of an FNG from Forintel, so were able to enter it without getting slain or enslaved on the way. One had cyborg devices that he had temporarily turned off, as they gave him warning of danger. The other had a cyborg device that showed her were edible and safe to eat food was to be found, and a lazer. They chatted to each other on the way there about what they wanted to do assuming they successfully became Decepticons and after they had served their first military stint. One wanted to become a Domintel agent, and the other one wanted to join a syndicate one day.

Soon enough they were writing the written part of their tests that came before their survival tests, and both were hoping for success. If they did end up being code read, it would reveal that the one who wanted to one day become a Domintel agent would have a bit of fear that they would think he was some kind of police supporter.

[Victorious Decepticons]

Of course, the ForIntel agent who was providing transportation made an internal recording of their conversation and discreetly handed a chip of it to Gatekeeper once they all got to the Immigration Office. This, however, was just standard procedure. Few were stupid enough to say anything that would sink their chances while aboard an overt ForIntel agent!

The written tests were easy for these applicants - after all, they were staunch Megatronists. In fact, they were more staunch than most Cybertronians, most of whom secretly thought Megatron's divinity was purely technological in nature - and thus, some kind of scam. Cybertronian natives had seen that saying that out loud would lead to a demonstration of power that they would not be able to overcome, however, so they went along with it despite their secret skepticism. There were a few true believers though, like the priests of Megatron.

Now, it was time for them to go to Earth for the survival test. Unlike usual, their specific locations would be chosen for them. This was because of their discussion on what they would want to do if they made it. Locastions that would also test the necessary skills for their goals made the most sense to Immigration.

The one who wanted to join a syndicate would be sent to Mexico, where the descendents of cartel members still plied their trade. Meanwhile, the would-be DomIntel agent would be sent to Kentucky - coal mining country to this day, but with Decepticon-owned mines - to see how he would navigate that situation...

[Vallermoore]

The would be syndicate member found herself in a Mexican savannah ,and turned on her cyborg device showing where food was to be found. It indicated where a vineyard was to be found a couple of miles away. She knew gathering the grapes would be dangerous, as the owners would no doubt be armed and not friendly to thieves, and if a random Decepticon showed up, she would be in trouble. Her lazer would not do much against a full size Decepticon. Soon enough she reached the edge of the vineyard, looked around for sings of trip ropes, pits or landmines, and for guards, and saw none, so prepared to gather a few bunches of grapes to eat and find a clean water source.

*****
The other one had a danger sensor, and a gun and full water bottle that he had taken from a defeated soldier of his nation, but he would have to find food without getting enslaved or killed in the process. There was an apple orchard nearby, the apples being used to reward some sapient pony slaves for hard enough work, but it would probably be guarded or at least watched with cameras. Of course, the guard watching the camaras might well be lazing around playing games, as there were no known threats in the area.

[Victorious Decepticons]

It was unusual to find a vinyard in cartel territory, and the reason for its presence would become clear if she ate a few clusters of the grapes. Since drugs were legal in the Empire, though, there was a small sign with a clue: Property of the Sinaloa Delivery Group. She had heard of this syndicate and knew that drugs and smuggling were its areas of expertise. Still, there seemed to be no one around, so she chowed down on some of the grapes and grabbed a few more bunches for later.

Everything seemed fine at first, but over the next few minutes, the entire landscape seemed to distort around her. By the time a few minutes passed, she was running terrified through the vines, which had sprouted Venus flytrap-like "heads" and were trying to bite her with fangs that dripped venom. The ground seemed to spin around her, and she quickly got lost. Her danger alarm sounded deep and ominous, but not in the way it was supposed to sound. She didn't even register the deep, resonant clang of a cage when she ran - oblinious to her real surroundings - headlong into a Sinaloan's trap.

Hours later, as the heavy dose of LSD finally wore off, she realized that she was now ina holding pen at the main slave market.

"Congratulations," a Decepticon said in a thick Spanish accent. "You found out how we smuggle 'acid.' By using GMO grapes that produce it internally! Customs agents always look in and under our boxes of produce for our products. But our product IS the produce, hahaha! Anyway, your prize is free lifetime employment, and MY prize is a hundred Cubes!"

~~~~~~~~~

In Kentucky, the would-be agent was having better luck...for now. He was easily able to pilfer some apples since nobody checked that field unless they needed some fruit or they were looking for a missing slave. However, apples alone weren't enough to keep a human running. He set off into the forest of the Blue Ridge Mountains with the intent to hunt or fish.

Soon after, he got the feeling that something was stalking him. He turned around and saw a large black bear...

[Vallermoore]

The Megatronist, who went by the name of Amy, felt for her implanted lazer, and realised she might be able to use it to destroy the lock on her cage door, but only if she could do it before the market opened the next day. As soon as the Decepticon walked away, she made a quick prayer to Megatron that camaras were not watching her and burned out the lock after a few minutes. However, she would have to find a way out without being seen by a Decepticon slaver guard, scooped up and chipped, and there was the possibility that one or more of the other slaves might snitch on her, hoping for a reward of some sort or just not wanting her to be free if they were themselves unable to escape.

*****
At the sight of the bear, the other Megatronist, John Travasson, knew that if he didn’t want to end up as bear food he would have to open fire with the gun despite the noise it would cause which might be heard by a Decepticon if any were nearby, and blasted at the bear’s chest at close range.

[Victorious Decepticons]

Immediately upon seeing Amy get the door open, all of the other slaves in her holding pen stampeded out, almost trampling her in the process. Intelligently, she used the chaos as cover for her own escape and sneaked off in a different direction. As expected, slave market guards focused on the big group and overlooked the one person who was, by now, in a slightly shadowed area between some empty pens. She moved quickly, and soon approached one of the big back doors. A Decepticon was near the next door over, but the place was so big that, that meant he was about 300 yards/meters away. Someone as tiny as a human was unlikely to be noticed.

Two main problems confronted her now: The door was massive and closed, and the switch to get it open was at Decepticon height; and there was the possibility of automatic alarms that might trigger if she made a mistake. A "mistake" could include just walking in the wrong spot, or something like improperly trying to bypass the opener switch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The bear looked enraged at the sudden pain, and charged for all it was worth at the man who seemed to be the cause. Despite a hasty magdump, it would take a few minutes for the lack of blood circulation to catch up to the beast and make it drop. It was doing a version of a "dead run" - where it was actually fatally wounded, but had enough 02 in its cells to keep operating for a bit.

John turned and ran, but it was far too late for that. The bear jumped on him from behind, easily knocking him down, and moved to make the kill.

Suddenly, John felt the bear's weight get lifted off of him. The musky scent of the animal went away, replaced by a whiff of Decepticon exhaust.

"Thanks for getting that damn thing to come out into the open!" A robotic voice said in English. John heard the bear's neck snap. "Won't be going anywhere now." It was true - with its neck broken, the bear was paralyzed, and it could cause no more danger in its last minute of life.

"Now for you~hey, get back here!!!"

John was now up and bolting into the woods at full speed. The Decepticon, who was an overseer at the nearby coal mine, made some attempts to grab the no-cost would-be slave, but John kept ducking and dodging until he was between the stout trees of the forest. The big Decepticon stood at the treeline, frustrated. He knew he could blast a bigger path for himself, but that he couldn't do it fast enough to catch an evading biological. On top of that, blasting could start a forest fire that would cause his slaves to overheat and melt non-biological assets like mine carts and infrastucture wiring. It was the same reason he hadn't been able to catch the bear that had been eating his slave livestock.

John got a good distance into the forest, using non-trail gaps between trees, before he dared to stop and catch his breath. He then checked out his surroundings. There appeared to be nothing but plants, a few small animals like squirrels and songbirds...for miles. He couldn't even see any markings from where he had come from. He did, however, smell the unique odor of wetness coming from one particular direction. Perhaps there was a small creek or a pond somewhere over there...

[Vallermoore]

Amy decided that her only hope was to hide in the shadows in the hope that a Decepticon might come in without seeing her, in which case she could flee through the door, hopefully before it closed again and crushed her flat. She used her laser to free some more slaves whilst she waited, so that the Decepticon might well be distracted by the other escapees and miss her. She decided that if she ended up with no way of escaping, she would kill herself rather then being enslaved for the rest of her life, in the hope of earning a better place in the Neutral Realm that was less hellish then a slave mine. However, right now she had everything to play for. If she succeeded in escaping the slave market and remaining free, she had a good chance of successfully immigrating despite being captured.

*****
John was about to be eaten by a bear, when a Decepticon killed it, and he made use of his size and the terrain to escape with success, leaving a frustrated overseer behind him. He carefully went to where there seemed to be water, wondering what other predators were nearby. He certainly needed a drink after his run, that was for sure.

[Victorious Decepticons]

Amy had to hide for several hours, but once the market opened for the day, so did ALL of the doors. She soon found that the rear doors were used to accept deliveries. The big door opened, but the instant it did, thousands of humans willingly streamed into the building, all looking very eager and ready to work. These were all from one of the nearby Raising Centers, and they were fully onboard with the idea of using their strength to help build the Empire into an even bigger juggernaut than it already was. These had been trained since their decantation at their Cloning Center not only in the Decepticon Way, but in how to do their intended jobs with expert skill.

Surprisingly, they did not look identical. There were over 100 "visual facial variations" of the Approved DNA Codec for the Human Species so that slave owners might be able to tell one from another, though in practice, most overseers still saw all humans as pretty much the same. Despite this, it was obvious that these were produced, not born. The cohort were all 15 years old, all the same height, all with augmented musculature and obvious gorilla-gene influence, and all with a puppy-dog sort of eagerness (which would become dog-like loyalty after a few weeks working for the same master and overseers). They were all fairly ugly since the esthetics of the genes brought in from other species were not considered for the Codec. Only the functional benefits of the Code mattered.

Several of them spotted Amy and helpfully invited her to come along with them, warning - with all seriousness - that she would miss her assignment if she wasn't in the right place when the recruiter from Megatron Metals came. For them, this was the Big Day in their young lives, when all of their training would pay off and they would "get to" work for one of the biggest Decepticon companies! They couldn't imagine that Amy wasn't thinking the same way.

Amy made up a story that she wasn't trained for that, and instead, was trained to work in shipping and receiving on other worlds. Then she marched past the clones and out the door as if she knew exactly where she was going. The clones, having no experience with anything outside of their Raising Center, bought it and didn't alert the Decepticons who had brought them there. Those Decepticons also didn't know what was up with Amy, and since they weren't being paid to care about any biologicals except the ones they were supervising, they did not care.

Other fresh livestock was coming in other doors all the way across the back wall of the market, which stretched so long that Amy couldn't see where it ended now that there were so many creatures walking around. She could see groups of ponies, all just as eager to get started as the humans were, and like the humans, they all had a few elements that seemed to have been ported over from other species. Notably, they also all had double cutie marks thanks to their Cloning Center's edits, and these marks did not have a natural diversity. Instead, they all had one of a pony leg in a military salute gesture - symbolizing unquestioningly obedient loyalty - and one that went with the specific job type they had been trained for. A Decepticon Seal was non-magically branded onto the opposite flank, marking each one as Decepticon property but NOT conferring any magical bonus to their deceptiveness.

Species that Amy had never seen before were also coming in. Lizard people, lobster people, and more appeared, though in far fewer numbers than the others. Humans were definitely the majority. That species could be sent anywhere on Earth and Earth-like planets and still function, while the more "exotic" types were usually more limited in range or abilities. Most of the exotics would be quickly taken to other worlds where humans didn't thrive but the other species would. Still, they were just as eager to be getting their "assignments" as the humans thanks to their Raising Center upbringings.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Decepticons attached to the Slave Market no longer cared about Amy either. They were now busy dealing with (500 Cube per head) Cloning Center stock coming in by the thousands, and they weren't diverting their attention to the one, 100-Cube wild one that was getting away right under their noses. She was like the one little chicken often found running around on the floor of a factory-farm egg production facility: Irrelevant compared to the massiveness of the overall operation now that it was running at full speed.

Now, she was outside. Unlike inside, Decepticons who saw her would be quite interested in catching her. If they did, they could bring her to the front of the Slave Market and sell her back to it for another 100 Cubes. The Market buyer would be unlikely to recognize her; to him, she was just another head of low-value wild stock. Therefore, she could actually be sold back to the market several times before they finally recognized her and refused to buy her again. still, it was best for her to avoid recapture at all since any time she got captured, it was possible that she wouldn't be able to get back out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

John made his way through the woods, very careful to look out for timber rattlesnakes, the nearly-invisible but deadly copperhead snakes, and of course, black bears. He finally arrived at a long, narrow creek that babbled peacefully through the woods. Songbirds sounded alarm calls upon his arrival, but soon settled down and watched him carefully from hidden spots up in the trees.

[Vallermoore]

John threw a small rock into the creek so that any alligators or crocodiles would rear up in anger and reveal themselves and when none did, he had a quick drink and refilled the water bottle he had brought with him. He looked around for a relatively safe place to sleep.

*******
After a long wait that was both boring and scary at the same time, all the doors opened and she was able to make her way out past the vendors such as “ Slaves R Us.” She was able to escape the clones and the Decepticons who if they saw her at all could not be bothered to scoop her up. Finding her way outside, a Decepticon came up pushing a slave cart of wood filled with caged slaves. He didn’t notice her and by throwing herself under the card she was able to take a ride on the bottom of it, sitting down on a bar that was seat size, and getting out before he reached her destination. Making it into the jungle, she silently sent up a prayer of thanks to Megatron for her escape. Most captured would be Decepticons would never have been able to escape from a locked slave cage but her built in laser that her captor had not seen had earned her freedom. Of course, she still had a while to go. Feeling in her pocket, she found a small bunch of those grapes.

Ahead, she heard the snuffling of a bear and hid behind a tree, throwing the drugged grapes near him. If he ate those and passed out, she could use her laser to cut him up and have some bear meat.

[Victorious Decepticons]

John didn't need to fear gators around here; Kentucky was too far north for there to be either them or crocodiles. However, every habitable part of Earth had some kind of snakes, and a "water moccasin" quickly swam to where the rock went into the water, hoping that the disturbance was some kind of prey. Luckily for John, the snake didn't come near his actual location, and he was able to get his water without trouble.

He found a clearing to lay down in, and when night fell, he marveled at the number of stars visible and how alien the constellations looked from his vantage point on Earth.

At some time in the middle of the night, he woke up to his intestines rumbling. He was soon voiding their contents in an uncomfortable and messy way. It was then that he realized that the creek water should have been boiled or otherwise sterilized before he drank it. Fortunately for him, the effects weren't devastating, but he got no more sleep that night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The bear gobbled the grapes, but LSD wasn't the type of drug to make a user pass out. Instead, the bear began to hallucinate, which caused it to behave strangely. He was lucky enough to experience a "good trip" instead of the horrors that Amy had seen, so he didn't run away or become violent, but he still behaved unpredictably since he was no longer perceiving reality. He wandered around looking like he was seeing and feeling marvelous things.

[Vallermoore]

Amy crept away in the opposite direction and started looking for somewhere safe to sleep, where she wouldn’t get captured by Decepticons or native humans or eaten by bears. Finding a cave, she advanced inside with her lazer at the ready , in case anything dangerous was inside. If there was another bear inside she would have to open fire at point blank range to avoid becoming bear food. She wondered if any of the other slaves that had been in her cage had also managed to successfully escape. She took out a couple of blow- up pillows from her pockets and blew them up, made a quiet prayer to Megatron that she could live at least a bit longer and settled down near the mouth of the cave to sleep.

*******

John used leaves to wipe his backside, cursing the dirty water that had made him ill. Still, at least he had got a bit of sleep and could function for another day. He would need to find some food soon. He had a gun, but the noise of a bullet could bring Decepticons if he were not careful. Unknown to him he had wiped his backside with poison ivy, and had become sensitised to it. This time around it hadn’t caused itching, but it would if he encountered it again. He comforted himself with thoughts of becoming a war robot.

[Victorious Decepticons]

Amy was awakened very suddenly when a guy came out of the back of the cave and tripped over her. In the flickering light of a flame torch, which he dropped as he fell, she could see him - and behind him, what appeared to be his wife or girlfriend, and a daughter who was about 8 years old. The two females were staring at her, while the man jumped up and got out a long knife before he had really processed what was happening.

Amy jumped up with her embedded laser ready since the man had his knife out. Fortunately, though, the confusion cleared fast enough for both of them to realize that they each had not started out with hostility in mind. This allowed them to refrain from instantly attacking each other.

The man kept his eyes firmly on Amy as he crouched down slowly and retrieved his torch. The flame sputtered, but then burned brighter and more evenly as he turned it upright.

"Who are you and what the hell are you doing in my cave?!?" He demanded, his knife still at the ready.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Meanwhile, John had good luck foraging. He found an elderberry tree that was loaded with fruit, and now that it was light out, he could see a good amount of fish swimming in the creek.

Due to his prior intestinal event, he was now very thirsty. He knew he would have to find a way to boil the water so he could drink some more. The trick would be to get a fire going well enough for it not to make visible smoke. If he did that, he could also cook up any fish he caught. The fish would almost surely be harboring whatever microbes were in the water, so they would need to be cooked to well-done in order to be properly edible...

[Vallermoore]

Amy backed off a bit, ready to go elsewhere, but equally ready to blast if she had to. “ Sorry about that. I’m Amy, and I am going through the needed test to become a Decepticon. I didn’t know that this cave was already occupied. I am happy enough to leave and not come back, unless there is something I can do for you in exchange for staying here for a day or two before I move on.” She decided that if she did have to blast, she would need to kill the whole family, but she didn’t want to kill them if it could be avoided. She was not someone who wanted to join the Genocide Battalion one day.

*****

John had some matches and kindling was plentiful but the problem was dealing with the smoke, which might bring a Decepticon down on him. He built a little fire just enough to boil some water, put it in a large tin cup that he had brought with him, set the water to boil, and , this time, managed to be lucky. Perhaps his minor Megatronist blessing had kicked in this time. He let the water cool and quenched his thirst and gathered some berries, ate them, and wondered how to catch a fish or two to cook. He didn’t have fishing gear with him, and shooting would almost certainly give his location away to any nearby Decepticon.

[Victorious Decepticons]

The caveman had to take a couple of seconds to process what he was hearing. Once it got through to him, he looked incredulous and furious at the same time.

"You want to what?! Why on Earth would you want that? Are you some kind of psycho!!? They think we're livestock and we live in caves and forests to avoid them! They're the enemy!"

In the background, the woman got out her berry-collection knife, and the kid picked up a stone from the cave floor. Amy would either have to run away or open fire fast - even though the man had said a lot of questions, his attitude and the actions of the women let her know that the time for talk was over.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

John noticed that some of the fish were swimming in and out of small holes in the banks of the river. These fish had large mouths and looked like they'd latch onto anything if they couldn't see what that thing was attached to.

Maybe I can just stick my hand in one of those holes and grab one, John thought to himself. He figured it was worth a try, especially since in this river, he'd be able to reach the holes just by wading in instead of diving.

[Vallermoore]

Reluctantly, Amy decided that she would have to open fire, since she wanted to use the cave for herself, and she panned with her lazer at the chest height aiming to kill. If she was successful in taking this cave, it would make a good home until her test came to an end and she could earn the Ultimate Upgrade. She could use the bodies as bait for carnivores and then blast them and slice them up for food when they did come. Her lazer was relatively quiet, at least compared to a gunshot, so using it was unlikely to bring down unwelcome Decepticon attention on her.

***

Despite the danger of a painful bite, John decided to noodle for one of these fish. Once cooked to stop it being poisonous, it would make a very good meal. So he stuck an arm in one of the holes that a fish had just swum into. If the fish thought it safe to swim into the hole then there was unlikly to be something like an alligator or a snake in there.

[Victorious Decepticons]

Amy's idea of using the bodies as bait wasn't as easy to implement as she thought it would be. The kid was easy to take out of the cave, but the adults were heavy and unwieldy. She finally got the wonam out, but the man weighed about 175 lbs. - too heavy even for dragging. She would have to rig something up in order to move him.

~~~~~~~~~~

The fish chomped down on John's hand, slightly penetrating the skin, but he managed to keep ahold of it and hauled it out of the water. After using a river rock to bash it in the head and kill it, he had himself the beginnings of a meal. Now all he had to do was cook it up. If he had a knife, he could filet it first so he didn't have to fight with a load of fish bones.

For some reason, John felt as if he was being watched, but when he looked around, he saw no person or large animal...

[Vallermoore]

Amy looked around for a way to get the man out. If she couldn’t figure out a way, then she would have to leave after two or three days when he started to swell up and stink disgustingly. She wondered if any large carnivores would show up soon for her to blast and eat.

******

John did have a knife and soon the fish was filleted and cooked and he could eat it without getting poisoned by it later. He drank his last bit of boiled water. The sun was starting to set and he felt a bit uneasy and his arm hurt a bit but at least it didn’t itch or feel like it was burning. He looked around for a safe place to sleep.

[Victorious Decepticons]

After a few hours, rigor mortis set in on the man. Amy realized that now, she might be able to get his body up onto logs and then roll it out without him flopping all over the place. She left the cave and used her laser to cut down a couple of small trees to use for this. After further cutting the trunks to suitable lengths, she brought the logs into the cave.

Starting at the head end, she managed to lift enough of the body to get part of it onto a log. Then, bit by bit, she was able to pull him onto more logs. Now she could roll the body towards the cave entrance. As each log rolled out from the foot end of the body, she moved it back to the head side to allow for further rolling. It was an ancient method, which some Earthians believed was used to move the giant blocks that made up the pyramids of Egypt. It was slow and a pain, but it did work, and eventually she was able to get the body all the way out.

Once Amy stopped working, she caught the glint of the eyes of a nocturnal animal watching from amongst the nearby trees. It was dark out by now, so she couldn't tell what kind of animal it was. She decided to go back in the cave and wait, weapon ready, to see what came to eat the bait she had provided...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

John fell into a fitful sleep under some trees, but that sleep didn't last long. Soon, he heard something that - at first - seemed fairly normal: an engine running. He was going to fall asleep right through it, but just as he was dropping off, he remembered that there were no cars here and nobody around riding on mowers, motorbikes, or any other engine-using equipment. He had to be hearing a Decepticon.

Sure enough, a pair of red eyes soon appeared, but not where he would have expected. These eyes seemed to be attached to something floating down the river. They also seemed way too small to be attached to a giant war robot.

John hid himself as well as he could and peered down the river with extreme interest, ready to bolt at a moment's notice. Soon enough, the eyes came closer - close enough to make out the trademark polygonal shape that went with the Decepticon Design Specification. Eventually, he could clearly see the bot. It turned out to be a lone scout, perhaps on vacation, riding what appeared to be a homemade motorboat. The bot's own engine wasn't making the noise he had heard. Instead, it was the boat's motor.

The bot spotted the remains of John's fire along with the remains of the fish - its head, tail, and a pile of bones. John heard the boat's motor turn off, followed by the splash of an anchor going into the water...

[Vallermoore]

Amy was very pleased to get the body out of there before it started to swell up, turn green and stink up the whole cave. Soon enough a wildcat showed up to eat the body and Amy blasted at it, hoping to be able to have wildcat meat that night.

*****

John had no sooner got to sleep on the hard ground then he was woken by the sound of a motorboat, and scrambled away to hide amongst the trees. The Decepticon android dropped anchor and got out onto the bank, a blaster coming out of each arm. Even an android body probably had very thick armour. “ Come on out! If I have to come in after you, it’s certainly going to go down ugly.”

John stuck his head out of the trees, keeping the rest of his body and his gun concealed. “ I am on a survival test,” he told the bot, hoping that the bot didn’t have a Genocider mindset. Some bots were happy at the thought of new bots, some detested biologicals outright and many were neutral on the issue but were likely to try to enslave biologicals just to get themselves some extra Energon.

[Victorious Decepticons]

Amy's aim was true, and the bobcat went down without any trouble. Its meat turned out to be both greasy and gamey, and it didn't take long for Amy to realize why people preferred to eat herbivores instead. Still, it was food...

Later, Amy decided to explore the rear of the cave and see if the prior occupants had anything worth keeping, or perhaps a better bed. When she got back there and fired up the torch the man had used, she saw that one chamber had indeed been made into a bedroom. It had no door since it was a natural cove, but it had a couple of sleeping mats and some furs that had been made into clothes. She was about to explore the rest of the "house" when she noticed a long, dark corridor that led to an unknown destination. This tunnel didn't seem to have been made into part of the living quarters...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Decepticon looked pleased, but also a bit put off.

"Oh, you ARE new here!" He commented. "Everyone who's been around a while knows to run like hell from a Decepticon no matter what he threatens! You're lucky I'm not looking for slaves. Slaving just isn't worth the bother for a skilled Lone Scout like myself. Plus, I remember what it was like to be a hungry biological on this planet."

John didn't know what to say, so he let the bot keep talking.

The bot patted his chest proudly. "Hardly anyone knows how to run one of these," he boasted, showing off his gleaming metal, but otherwise humanlike, android form. "But I have a 'knack' for it. A knack that happens to come from having run the biological version of this body for about 40 years before I ditched it. One of the last things I did with that body was scope out a place called 'The Louvre' - have you heard of it? They were looking for me right up until the moment France was overrun by the Decepticons!" He laughed, obviously proud of some sort of Deceptish operation he had been part of.

[Vallermoore]

Carefully, her lazer at the ready and a flaming torch in her hand to provide light, Amy set off to see if there were any unknown people down there. Earth had never had either giant spiders or changeling hives, so she was not going to be facing either of those, but she feared there might be sons and daughters of the small family that she had slain that might murder her in her sleep an£ send her to the Room of Three Screens if she were not careful. She decided she would not explore too deeply, not wanting to risk getting lost in a maze of underground tunnels and starving to death down there.

******

“ So does a Lone Scout do all his own raiding or does he scout for several Deception gangs at once to earn Energon by finding places for the gangs to raid?”John asked. “ I come from another planet entirely, I am trying to join your race through a survival test like you once did. So I don’t know what the Louvre used to be.”

[Victorious Decepticons]

"Ahh, the Louvre," the bot said with a happy sigh. "It was THE premier classical art museum on this planet. Thousands of people came daily to see the famous artworks it held. It also used to house the French Crown Jewels, as well as several crowns. Used to." He seemed to swell with pride.

"The Heist was completely unexpected. We rocked up in broad daylight and used a big truck called a 'furniture elevator' to raise a ladder-like thing to the balcony of the room that held the crowns and a few other royal things. And in just 7 minutes, we did a bare-walls raid on that room. They hardly knew what hit it." By now he was grinning and puffing up in victory as though he had just done it. "Within a few days, they nabbed most of my buds, but me and the group leader got away and were on the lam. They had managed to identify me, but never caught up - and we still had the crowns and their jewels. And then the Decepticons came."

"I immediately asked for citizenship, not expecting them to actually get *the entire planet.* I passed the written part easily, but really struggled here. Us artsy types are not cut out for the wilderness, even those of us on the shadow side of the trade! But we ARE observant, and I observed a bird that didn't reflect light like natural ones do. One like THAT - " He pointed directly at a specific bird that was watching them from a branch at the edge of the river. "and I knew it had to be a Decepticon agent. I paid the bird the necklace of Empress Marie Louise to let me end the test early and mark me as 'passed."

"When I got to Cybertron, they said that the usual protocol was to take bribe items and fly away laughing, but that I offered THAT as the bribe proved that I was a true Decepticon-in-Spirit, that I was observant enough to spot the agent, and most importantly, I was a successful Decepticon-in-Spirit. That checked enough boxes to get me in. I passed the code-read, and after spending a dreadful year playing soldier, I joined up with the ICC as a Lone Scout."

After he finished talking, the bird he pointed at flew away, making a disgruntled-sounding "caw" as it left. Not long after, a bear showed up on the ground near where the bird had been.

"Oh, now they've sent a 'bear.'" The bot commented, as though he thought that animal was also painfully obvious. In reality, to someone who had not spent years training himself to notice how light plays off of real things, it was indiscernible from its natural counterparts.

"As a lone scout, I check out places to find out what loot they have and help figure out how to acquire it, and then we do our best to actually get it. Most Lone Scouts find and check out oil-bearing worlds, but I'm with a more discerning division. WE focus on small, valuable items that can be resold even if they're known to be hot...'rarities' like those in the Louvre, only in places all over the galaxy. There's always some shadowy rich guy willing to sponsor us by setting things up so we can get what we really want, which is, of course, millions of barrels of fine oil..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Amy crept deeper into the cave, and she noticed that it was once home to a (real) bear. The bearskin was on a bed-like sleeping pad, but its bones were in a room-like area along with the bones of a few other large animals. Apparently, leaving bones outside had been drawing unwanted attention. Many steps later, down a long hallway, she came to a sturdy metal door that had no obvious way to open it. On it was a seal that was very familiar to her, but that the cave-people had probably never learned about. There, in the flickering light and shadow of her torch flame, was a large Autobot Seal.

By the lack of apparent maintenance and accumulated rust, it was apparent that this door hadn't been used in centuries. Amy figured that the door would open by sliding rather than swinging in or out, but she didn't know if it was meant to slide to the right or left, upwards, or down into the floor. In fact, she thought to herself, it might be too rusty to move at all anymore.

Edits for typos and to fix a weird glitch that put the end of John's part after the end of Amy's section.

[Vallermoore]

( OOC- sorry about the slow reply.)

IC-Amy tried the door carefully, because if there were other members of the family she had killed during the night hiding behind it, they might sneak out and murder her in the middle of the night whilst she slept, and she was not ready to go to the Room of Three Screens if she could possibly avoid it. After a lot of pushing and pulling it grated open with a loud squeaky sound. Inside was, in effect, a makeshift altar to Optimus Prime with an Optimus Prime toy set up to represent him. She blasted it, and searched the room, finding some tasty dried meat and some still drinkable water in clay jars, and a ladder going up to a secret back entrance. She blasted the Prime toy and kicked the altar over, seeing it as heresy of the worst kind. Then she went back into the other part of the cave and was about to go to sleep when with a loud grunting the bodies of those that she had slain started rising as zombies. She had to blast them with headshots with her laser and then went to sleep rather nervously, hoping no other zombies were near.

*****

“ I hope to be as successful as you are one day, if…” John said, and then a small starship that was obviously not a Decepticon landed nearby, and a changeling came out and bowed to them.

“ Greetings to both of you, one of you is clearly an armoured knight. I am a Changeling scout who looks for new planets where new Changeling Hives can be set up and new love sources can be found, and this looks like a great place to report to my Queen.”

John blurted out “That would be an incredibly stupid mistake to make. This planet is Decepticon territory, and they won’t tolerate anybody just moving in and treating it as free real estate. They. blast squatters on the spot. And the one beside me is not an armoured knight, but is a Decepticon android.”

“Would you like to come back to my planet? Your love would get you at the least, somewhere to live, and your friend’s love could buy him a mansion, or guest rights in a Hive, as it is the hardest and rarest love in the universe.”

“Thank you but no thank you,” said John, wondering if it was worth shooting the changeling, whose chitin didn’t look that thick, stealing his ship, and flying to a new bit of the planet each day, or if that would attract fatal Decepticon attention. Meanwhile, the Domintel agent silently sent a message about the changeling that was thinking of setting up a Hive on Decepticon territory without Megatron’s permission to do so.

[Victorious Decepticons]

"Wait a minute," the bot said quickly. He stood up slowly, and managed to give John an angry glance that the changeling didn't notice. "That sounds like a mighty fine deal to me, even if he doesn't want to go!"

Silently and secretly, he sent a ping to his ICC contacts using the syndicate's secret code. The pattern of the secret message let them know he was now following a hot lead and that he considered it dangerous. On Cybertron, a secret data tunnel leading to the group's emergency save vault was immediately activated, just in case.

John just stood there flabbergasted as the Decepticon eagerly boarded the foreign craft. It would only be later that he would realize that the bot's eyes shone clearly as he got into the ship, showing that he was as intent on shafting the changeling as the changeling was intent on sticking it to him. The two shysters then took off into space, each sure that the other one would end up sorry.

The DomIntel agent silently radioed in what had happened. On Cybertron, several agents made bets on who would come out ahead. Most, but not all, bet that the Decepticon would win. A few thought that the changeling would win because there were a lot of them and only one Lone Scout with a relatively weak human-style android body. However, one refused to bet at all. He said it would come down to who was the better conniver, not to the strongest, and noted that it was likely that an ICC strike force would come in if their scout either needed them or he sent the coordinates of a good raid target.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Amy was dozing rather than fully asleep when she heard what sounded like a nice robotic voice calling out in Binary. It was coming from the "Autobot temple" part of the cave.

She jumped up, laser ready, and crept back into the area. Now, she saw what she had overlooked before: relics of obviously alien origin. She also noticed that now, dim light was coming from behind a thick layer of dust about 50 feet above her. The square shape of the lit areas gave the impression that some long-dormant screens were now running, though the dust made it impossible to see if they actually showed anything or were just idle.

The voice came again. This time it was clearly emanating from a counter that was attached to the framework holding the monitors. Amy thought hard, and finally pieced together some of the Binary, though it was in an un-Decepticon dialect that made it a bit harder to understand.

"Is anyone there? Is anybody left?" The computer voice said.

Amy understood the situation now. This was the childlike, but sapient, controller associated with the supercomputer whose screens she had been seeing - a sort of Teletraan-lite used by what had actually started as not a temple, but a secret Autobot sub-base. The zombie phenomenon had brought it back online, at least for a while, but since it wasn't built with a mobile body, it couldn't "rise" to become a menace. It could only call out pitifully, wondering why it was no longer getting any data transmissions. Its last memories were of the Decepticons storming in and shooting up the place, so it feared the worst...