2027 general election (IC/closed)

[Nationalist Northumbria]

IC: The Green candidate for Stroud says “Labour want us to go to war over a statue whilst the Tories want Stroud to be under martial law.”

Both these claims are ridiculous exaggerations.

Are they really?

[Most of Britain]

IC: The Green candidate for Stroud says “Labour want us to go to war over a statue whilst the Tories want Stroud to be under martial law.”

Both these claims are ridiculous exaggerations.

Are they really?

OOC:
Yes, Labour don’t want to go to war over a statue, even Helen Khan simply wants to take the statue by stealth. If Northumbria wants a war over a statue that’s different.

Meanwhile, the Tories simply want more police officers in Stroud including riot police not soldiers patrolling the streets or weakening of the legal process.

IC: Helen Khan says “Alvin Ashleigh steals a statue and says he wonders why we should care about it. Why?
Obviously to make us look weak.”

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Britain's top secret agent, Marine A, arrives at MI6 HQ.

[Most of Britain]

Britain's top secret agent, Marine A, arrives at MI6 HQ.

IC: Whilst at HQ, he is greeted by Philip Proudfoot, who previously served in the MI5 Northumbrian Nationalist and Dissident Republican desks, and a certain Northumbrian former armed robber who had served as a soldier in the Parachute Regiment (who was closely watched by the Counter Terrorist Command officers present).

“I am the head of the Secret Intelligence Service Northumbria Desk.” explains Philip Proudfoot,

“we need you to acquire Greg’s Monument from the Northumbrian government, John here, who was once an military man himself, will explain the specifics of bypassing the Northumbria Police
As a trained marine commando I’m sure your training will allow you to understand how to carry out a raid.”

OOC: is polling day over?

If so Who won more seats nationally, the Conservatives or Labour?

Helen Khan would have won Gloucester.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Britain's top secret agent, Marine A, arrives at MI6 HQ.

IC: Whilst at HQ, he is greeted by Philip Proudfoot, who previously served in the MI5 Northumbrian Nationalist and Dissident Republican desks, and a certain Northumbrian former armed robber who had served as a soldier in the Parachute Regiment (who was closely watched by the Counter Terrorist Command officers present)
“I am the head of the Secret Intelligence Service Northumbria Desk.” explains Philip Proudfoot, we need you to acquire Greg’s Monument from the Northumbrian government, John here, who was once an military man himself, will explain the specifics of bypassing the Northumbria Police.
As a trained marine commando I’m sure your training will allow you to understand how to carry out a raid.”
OOC: is polling day over?

If so Who won more seats nationally, the Conservatives or Labour?

Helen Khan would have won Gloucester.

The results are in: it's a Labour landslide, and the Conservatives have lost all their seats. Of course, this would not have been particularly surprising in-universe and there would have been years of polls and by-elections leading up to this result, but whatever. The SNP has been almost completely wiped out due to a backlash against Scottish independence after Alvin Ashleigh went on a drunken late-night rant threatening to "retake Edwinesburh." The polls showing the Yorkshire Party doing well, meanwhile, turned out to have been faked by a dedicated group of online trolls.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Britain's top secret agent, Marine A, arrives at MI6 HQ.

IC: Whilst at HQ, he is greeted by Philip Proudfoot, who previously served in the MI5 Northumbrian Nationalist and Dissident Republican desks, and a certain Northumbrian former armed robber who had served as a soldier in the Parachute Regiment (who was closely watched by the Counter Terrorist Command officers present).

“I am the head of the Secret Intelligence Service Northumbria Desk.” explains Philip Proudfoot,

“we need you to acquire Greg’s Monument from the Northumbrian government, John here, who was once an military man himself, will explain the specifics of bypassing the Northumbria Police
As a trained marine commando I’m sure your training will allow you to understand how to carry out a raid.”

"Alright," says Marine A.

[Most of Britain]

IC: Whilst at HQ, he is greeted by Philip Proudfoot, who previously served in the MI5 Northumbrian Nationalist and Dissident Republican desks, and a certain Northumbrian former armed robber who had served as a soldier in the Parachute Regiment (who was closely watched by the Counter Terrorist Command officers present).

“I am the head of the Secret Intelligence Service Northumbria Desk.” explains Philip Proudfoot,

“we need you to acquire Greg’s Monument from the Northumbrian government, John here, who was once an military man himself, will explain the specifics of bypassing the Northumbria Police
As a trained marine commando I’m sure your training will allow you to understand how to carry out a raid.”

"Alright," says Marine A.

“Good.” He says, whilst the man who was named
John explains to him how the Northumbria Police operate.
Marine A is given a credible cover story and a license to kill “if necessary to achieve the mission whilst avoiding death or capture” and “if necessary to protect innocents from violence during the mission.”

Meanwhile, Helen Khan puts a bill forward increasing police and Army pay, increasing the penalty for assaulting a police officer or prison officer in the execution of their duties to five years imprisonment, introducing an offence of ‘assaulting a current or former member of the armed forces, targeted as such’ (also intended to be punishable by five years imprisonment) and introducing four years imprisonment for ‘assaulting an emergency service worker (excluding police and prison officers and military personnel) in the execution of their duties’ four years as it is believed they are less likely to be targeted.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

"Alright," says Marine A.

“Good.” He says, whilst the man who was named
John explains to him how the Northumbria Police operate.
Marine A is given a credible cover story and a license to kill “if necessary to achieve the mission whilst avoiding death or capture” and “if necessary to protect innocents from violence during the mission.”

Meanwhile, Helen Khan puts a bill forward increasing police and Army pay, increasing the penalty for assaulting a police officer or prison officer in the execution of their duties to five years imprisonment, introducing an offence of ‘assaulting a current or former member of the armed forces, targeted as such’ (also intended to be punishable by five years imprisonment) and introducing four years imprisonment for ‘assaulting an emergency service worker (excluding police and prison officers and military personnel) in the execution of their duties’ four years as it is believed they are less likely to be targeted.

Marine A considers his options for going North.

[Most of Britain]

IC:
“Any luck getting there?”, Philip Proudfoot asks Marine A on a phone Proudfoot has never used before.

Following riot police and the canine unit being deployed to patrol certain areas of the district, the Green MP for Stroud says “this didn’t work in Northumbria and it won’t work here.”

Meanwhile, Dr.Helen Khan MP argues that

“police officers, prison officers, military officers and military enlisted personnel all stand at the gate keeping the pillaging and often brutally violent hordes at bay.
They are essential public servants.
So are paramedics, who have until now had no special protection.
These jobs weren’t ever paid as much as they deserve.
We will raise police and military pay through this bill and raise paramedics’ pay through our healthcare police.
We will reward them for serving the people of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

We will also deter the cowards who hunt for their fellow human beings in packs (as also happens to our heroic firefighters from time time, something law will also deter),
the cowards who would rather punch an innocent person in the face and run than face justice for their crimes.
Now the sentence will be so severe it won’t be worth the risks of attacking them, they will get 7.8% to 8.8% pay rises compared to what they are paid now or even 10% in the case of military personnel of all ranks, PSNI officers and members of the Yorkshire police services.
We will honour our heroes in the armed forces,
police forces, Fire and Rescue Services and National Health Service.”

[Nationalist Northumbria]

IC:
“Any luck getting there?”, Philip Proudfoot asks Marine A on a phone Proudfoot has never used before.

Following riot police and the canine unit being deployed to patrol certain areas of the district, the Green MP for Stroud says “this didn’t work in Northumbria and it won’t work here.”

Meanwhile, Dr.Helen Khan MP argues that

“police officers, prison officers, military officers and military enlisted personnel all stand at the gate keeping the pillaging and often brutally violent hordes at bay.
They are essential public servants.
So are paramedics, who have until now had no special protection.
These jobs weren’t ever paid as much as they deserve.
We will raise police and military pay through this bill and raise paramedics’ pay through our healthcare police.
We will reward them for serving the people of Great Britain and Northern Ireland.

We will also deter the cowards who hunt for their fellow human beings in packs (as also happens to our heroic firefighters from time time, something law will also deter),
the cowards who would rather punch an innocent person in the face and run than face justice for their crimes.
Now the sentence will be so severe it won’t be worth the risks of attacking them, they will get 7.8% to 8.8% pay rises compared to what they are paid now or even 10% in the case of military personnel of all ranks, PSNI officers and members of the Yorkshire police services.
We will honour our heroes in the armed forces,
police forces, Fire and Rescue Services and National Health Service.”

Marine A is taking the train to York. He plans to glide across the border because it will look cool.

[Most of Britain]

IC: Police and military pay is raised by 8.5% and 10% respectively. In addition, nurses pay is raised by 9.5%, paramedics pay by 7.5% and firefighters pay by 8.15%.

Three year prison terms are instituted for attacks targeting police officers, prison officers and military personnel with two year terms for attacks on other emergency service personnel.

This is paid for by very restrictive tariffs on certain foreign (especially Northumbrian) products including steel and coal whilst British steel mills receive subsidies, more are hilt and there are plans to bring back mining in the Somerset coalfield.

The Green MP for Stroud tries to obstruct development from the planned site of the mines and is arrested by the Gloucestershire Constabulary.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Marine A is now in Northumbria, having glided across the border. He is currently drunk in a Barnard Castle pub.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Marine A meets with his contact, Darren Grimes, codename 'Crafty'.

[Most of Britain]

Marine A meets with his contact, Darren Grimes, codename 'Crafty'.

IC: Darren Grimes gives him the information, both on the armed Northumbria Police patrols around Grey’s monument and on the political situation in terms of rising militarism.

He is careful to make sure no one else hears.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Marine A meets with his contact, Darren Grimes, codename 'Crafty'.

IC: Darren Grimes gives him the information, both on the armed Northumbria Police patrols around Grey’s monument and on the political situation in terms of rising militarism.

He is careful to make sure no one else hears.

Marine A drives to Newcastle.

[Most of Britain]

IC: Darren Grimes gives him the information, both on the armed Northumbria Police patrols around Grey’s monument and on the political situation in terms of rising militarism.

He is careful to make sure no one else hears.

Marine A drives to Newcastle.

IC:
Darren Grimes leaves Northumbria and goes “on holiday” to London, soon he will be ‘arrested’ by the Metropolitan Police for espionage as part of an elaborate ploy.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Marine A is wondering how, exactly, he is supposed to "acquire Greg’s Monument" [sic] in a raid.

[Most of Britain]

Marine A is wondering how, exactly, he is supposed to "acquire Greg’s Monument" [sic] in a raid.

IC: Darren Grimes is arrested in London for espionage, the allegations are published in the press.

Marine A receives a message, “take it when their numbers be at da lowest, shoot as many of the Ops as you need.”

If he escapes, the plans is to disguise it as a common robbery and pretend they only got the statue by apprehending the thief, who later escaped.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Marine A is wondering how, exactly, he is supposed to "acquire Greg’s Monument" [sic] in a raid.

IC: Darren Grimes is arrested in London for espionage, the allegations are published in the press.

Marine A receives a message, “take it when their numbers be at da lowest, shoot as many of the Ops as you need.”

If he escapes, the plans is to disguise it as a common robbery and pretend they only got the statue by apprehending the thief, who later escaped.

Marine A does not understand this code. It is quickly dawning on him that the people ordering this operation are idiots.

[Most of Britain]

IC: Darren Grimes is arrested in London for espionage, the allegations are published in the press.

Marine A receives a message, “take it when their numbers be at da lowest, shoot as many of the Ops as you need.”

If he escapes, the plans is to disguise it as a common robbery and pretend they only got the statue by apprehending the thief, who later escaped.

Marine A does not understand this code. It is quickly dawning on him that the people ordering this operation are idiots.

IC: “just take the statue! Shot them when there aren’t many!”


OOC: he could have dynamite to blow the podium off and then hijack a lorry to carry it, paying compensation from the expenses account on behalf of HM government.

Unless you include Q (Quartermaster) Branch under “idiots”.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

Marine A does not understand this code. It is quickly dawning on him that the people ordering this operation are idiots.

IC: “just take the statue! Shot them when there aren’t many!”


OOC: he could have dynamite to blow the podium off and then hijack a lorry to carry it, paying compensation from the expenses account on behalf of HM government.

Unless you include Q (Quartermaster) Branch under “idiots”.

OOC: Have you googled the monument Azad

[Most of Britain]

IC: “just take the statue! Shot them when there aren’t many!”


OOC: he could have dynamite to blow the podium off and then hijack a lorry to carry it, paying compensation from the expenses account on behalf of HM government.

Unless you include Q (Quartermaster) Branch under “idiots”.

OOC: Have you googled the monument Azad

OOC: yes; I confused podium and pedestal.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

OOC: Have you googled the monument Azad

OOC: yes; I confused podium and pedestal.

OOC: OK

[Most of Britain]

OOC: yes; I confused podium and pedestal.

OOC: OK

IC: A message is sent to Marine A, “do you understand me?”
Meanwhile, Darren Grimes is in prison awaiting trial for espionage.

[Nationalist Northumbria]

OOC: OK

IC: A message is sent to Marine A, “do you understand me?”
Meanwhile, Darren Grimes is in prison awaiting trial for espionage.

"Yes."