The International College of Dodging (OOC/sign-ups)

[Yusufzai Swat]

Are you looking for a school that teaches Latin and Classical Arabic?

Tired of assassination attempts from the left or the Amistad declaration signatories?

Tired of the threat of kidnapping from international mafia groups?

Tired of bias of many national education systems?

You need the International College of Dodging!


The International College of Dodging is a college teaching students in the 16-18 age range, as well as teaching self-defence through Dodging it teaches a range of languages (both ancient and modern), Philosophy, religious studies,
rhetoric and (to those who attend the Cadet Corps) anti-Dodging warfare as well as, of course, all the standard school subjects.

The usual fees are $37,018.50 per term.

Exceptional merit in political theory, religious studies, the natural science, cricket or Dodging is required for a scholarship.

Student application

Full name (no titles):
Titles:
Age:
Gender:
Subjects chosen:
Religion:
[] Islam
[] Christianity (Protestantism)
[] Christianity (Catholicism)
[] Christianity (Orthodox)
[] Christianity (other, please specify)
[] Judaism (Reform)
[] Judaism (Conservative)
[] Judaism (Orthodox)
[] Judaism (other, please specify)
[] Samaritanism
[] other religion (please specify)
[] no religion
Dietary restrictions (if applicable):
Stated personality (please describe):
Personality (can be the same as difference):
Sexual orientation:
Do they wish to take part in Cadet Corps (yes/no):
Do they seek a scholarship (yes/no):
How much will they pay (minimum £7,000 per term, even with a scholarship)?:
Type of scholarship sought:

Policies for students

Behaviour:
In class:
If the teacher is speaking and the student wishes to raise a question or a point they must raise their hand.
Mobile phones must be either on silent or switched off.
No eating in class.
Out of class:
Students must not fight except in legitimate sporting competitions, self-defence or duels between students of the same gender subject to the Duelling Policy.
A female student may only court one male, less than two years younger, at the same time. She must not meet with him without a chaperone.
Dress and Appearance:
Shirts must be tucked in.
Makeup besides khol or (for female students) besides Kohl and eyeliner is prohibited.
Shorts and skirts must be knee-length or longer.
General:
Expressions of hostility on racial or religious grounds are prohibited.
Violations of rules may be punished by a warning, gating or, in rare cases, suspension or even expulsion.
Please refrain from bringing a firearm into the school.

Teacher application (teachers are paid $37,500 to $95,000 per year)

Full name (no titles):
Gender:
Titles:
Level of education:
Subject they intend to teach:
Degree subject (if applicable):
Degree grade:
References:
Stated reason for wanting the job:
Previous job(s) if applicable:
Criminal convictions (if applicable):
Criminal charges awaiting trial (if applicable):
Are they:
[] A racial supremacist (e.g. white supremacist, black supremacist)
[] A communist
[] an anarchist (excluding anarcho-capitalists)
[] a nihilist
[] a libertine
[] a supporter of Incel and related ideologies
[] a radical feminist
[] a supporter of violence in the furtherance of vegan or vegetarian causes.
Dietary restrictions (if applicable):
stated Personality (please describe):
Actual personality (can be the same or different)
Sexual orientation:
Marital status:
Other information (optional):

Teacher requirements

-Convicted sex offenders, child abusers and racist attackers are not welcome as teachers.
- Teachers must be High school graduates.
- Teachers for subjects except Dodging, Anti-Dodging and PE must have University degrees or (in the case of religious studies teachers) equivalent religious credentials in the religion they intend to teach about.

Teacher conduct policies

- Teachers must obey the laws of Swat whilst there.
- Teachers must not publicly behave in a way that reflects badly on the image or the College or publicly express opinions that do the same whilst they are there.
-Social media counts as public.
-Teachers should be polite to students, other staff, visitors and non-teaching staff.
- Teachers should not behave inappropriately at work.