New Frenco Empire wrote:Atomic Utopia Imported Sports Car - Just...don't. If you don't get cancer the first time you refuel, the first fender-bender you get into will make Pripyat look like a family theme park.
Sports Car? United Socialist Systems of Atomic Utopia? In the same sentence? What kind of bourgeois capitalist pig dog trickery is this! Sports cars cannot be made of cardboard and have a waiting list that takes years to go through.
Here are some ideas for the products my nation will have on the storefront. ST & Tecton, what program is generating the voices?
Atomnaya MK-II - Made of only the finest radiation resistant cardboard and powered by the second least safe nuclear reactor in existence the Atomikós is an excellent way to make a statement about yourself. Assuming that is you want to be known as a person who thinks that using a hilariouslyunsafe reactor is a good way to power a car. The car also comes with all kinds of practical features for the glorious worker to benefit from. Ever lost your car in a parking garage? Well no more, with this car all you need to do is pull out a geiger counter and go to the most radioactive source in the location. Switch to a scintillation detector when the geiger counter inevitably overloads. You can also use the reactor as an impromptu food irradiation device and x-ray machine. So sign up on the waiting list today and pray that your grandchildren will receive one and the Central Committee did not mess up filing the form.
GYR (Home Nuclear Reactor) Mk-III - When this design was unveiled at the third international committee of nuclear reactor designers it received widespread praise* and was quickly approved for construction by the reactor safety committee** due to it's immense safety features. The reactor is fueled using plutonium oxide fuel, is moderated using graphite, and is controlled by a simple central control rod. This setup is so simple only an idiot could mess up controlling it. In fact, there have been no accidents so far,*** meaning it is an extremely safe and efficient reactor. It can power a home or provide the neutrons needed for science projects.
*As a demonstration of how not to design nuclear reactors.
**After a few bribes were given to them.
***In a small 50 square kilometer area that never had said reactors built there.
Plutonium Heating Pads - A great solution for back pain and other such problems, these pads will last nearly 90 years with a power output at or exceeding their rated power output. When you immediately get them they can be used to cook food, heat drinks, and scare people by auto igniting when the container surrounding the plutonium is breached.
