Raw Nation has elections

[Raw Nation]

Here is how elections work in Raw Nation

the top two vote-getting candidates enter the ring

the winner is president, the loser is vice-president

Here are the candidates:

The Rock
Party: People's Party
Platform: Communist

Ric Flair
Party: Green Party
Platform: Protect nature

Randy Savage
Party: Macho Party
Platform: outlaw same-sex marriage, protect meat stick industry

The Iron Sheik
Party: Islamic Revolutionary Party of Raw Nation
Platform: impose sharia law

Rowdy Roddy Piper
Party: National Alliance for the Destruction of Aliens (NADA)
Platform: eliminate illegal aliens

Tiffany
Party: Vegan Party
Platform: NO MEAT IN RAW NATION

polls open today and everybody is anxiously awaiting the first results

[Raw Nation]

The Rock is already gloating egotistically and raising his eyebrow in a mischievous manner...

What does he have planned for the hard-working bourgeoisie of Raw Nation???

He then retreats into his mansion and begins to design a new communist flag for Raw Nation

"The bull will symbolize the indomitable strength of Marx-Lenin-Rockism..." he says to himself.

[Raw Nation]

IN THE NEWS:

The Iron Sheik says all women in Raw Nation will have to wear burkhas even in the ring (female wrestling will be done behind a curtain)

Randy Savage announces a plan to increase meat stick production by 27%

We remind you write-in candidates are accepted under the Raw Nation Constitution

[Raw Nation]

IN THE NEWS:

Ric Flair promises to ban cars and make everyone drive little electric scooters

Tiffany blames male chauvinism and carnovirorism for her poor showing

The Rock is scheming to make a comeback

[Raw Nation]

IN THE NEWS:

Raw Nation election rocked by scandal!

The Rock has been accused of sexual harassment by a lady who was in one of his movies a few years ago

She says he grabbed her butt, but he says he never even heard of her

Randy Savage's meat stick factory has been shut down for health reasons because of high contents of pony meat

Rowdy Roddy Piper beat a businessman with a baseball bat yesterday!

Naked pictures of Tiffany have been found on the internet

[Raw Nation]

A few hours before the polls close The Rock goes to the Presidential Mansion whistling innocently.

He hits President HHH in the head with a metal chair, rips the presidential belt off, puts HHH in a chokehold and throws him out the window.

Buckling on the presidential belt, The Rock is now the president of Raw Nation due to a loophole in the constitution.

Raw Nation is now a communist nation!

The Rock sits down at the desk and begins to make laws.

LAW ONE - All parties but Marx-Lenin-Rockism are now ILLEGAL.

LAW TWO - All money goes to the president of Raw Nation who will give it to the people according to their needs.

[The Godly Nations]

The Godly Nations shall not sit idly by as Communism is foisted upon an unwilling population. If you do not abdicate now, and renounce Socialism, and allow Free Market Capitalism, we, the Godly Nations, will have no choice but to forcefully open the market to private enterprise, and, to prevent all government intervention in the market, take over your governance as well. Indeed, we have already choosen a viceroy...Cecil Demary.


Surrender now, and embrace capitalism, and we shall be your first friend, but...obdurate in your sins, and we shall have to annex you.

[Raw Nation]

The Rock writes a new law giving everyone in Raw Nation a Ford F-350 turbodiesel pickup and a year of free gas plus copies of all his many enjoyable movies.

He ignores the writing on the message from the Godly Nation but gives a mischievous eyebrow raise when he sees the pictures of the babe.

He writes a reply:

"She's fine. I will give you 1500 Raw Nation dollars if she comes to the Presidential Mansion tonight."

[The Godly Nations]

The Rock writes a new law giving everyone in Raw Nation a Ford F-350 turbodiesel pickup and a year of free gas plus copies of all his many enjoyable movies.

He ignores the writing on the message from the Godly Nation but gives a mischievous eyebrow raise when he sees the pictures of the babe.

He writes a reply:

"She's fine. I will give you 1500 Raw Nation dollars if she comes to the Presidential Mansion tonight."

Reading this, Lord Protector General Susan angry scribbled, half intelligibly, this letter:

Mr Rock-

He's my grandson, you Red dolt, and he's not a common whore! Apologise immediately, and we may reconsider our invasion! In fact, you can take your money and shove, we have more of it than you do, you are not going anywhere near my grandson! The only men allowed near him in a bedroom is me, and the Archbishop.

Yours,

LP Gen. Susan.

[Raw Nation]

The Rock is creeped out

[The Godly Nations]

The Rock is creeped out

Dear Honoured Sir,

The Godly Nations will promise to send 'aid' and 'articles of self defence', of any desired amount, provided that you allow companies open shops and factory in your glorious nation.

Sincerely Yours,

Sir Horatio Algers, MP

[Soviet Canuckistan]

We support Rowdy Roddy Party since he's the only one who's not crazy.

[Raw Nation]

Rowdy Roddy has been sent to a mental institution for being insane

The Rock throws all communications from the Godly Nations into the People's Trashcan and feels uncomfortable inside.

[Kaizerxisiv]

The Rock writes a new law giving everyone in Raw Nation a Ford F-350 turbodiesel pickup and a year of free gas plus copies of all his many enjoyable movies.

He ignores the writing on the message from the Godly Nation but gives a mischievous eyebrow raise when he sees the pictures of the babe.

He writes a reply:

"She's fine. I will give you 1500 Raw Nation dollars if she comes to the Presidential Mansion tonight."

Reading this, Lord Protector General Susan angry scribbled, half intelligibly, this letter:

Mr Rock-

He's my grandson, you Red dolt, and he's not a common whore! Apologise immediately, and we may reconsider our invasion! In fact, you can take your money and shove, we have more of it than you do, you are not going anywhere near my grandson! The only men allowed near him in a bedroom is me, and the Archbishop.

Yours,

LP Gen. Susan.

[OOC: This was the funniest thing I've seen on NS ever. Probably a faux pas to be OOC right now, but I just had to say this last part of the thread here made my day. You both are my heroes.]