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The New Amsterdam Daily (Political Satire/Comedy RP) OOC

For all of your non-NationStates related roleplaying needs!

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Caliland
Envoy
 
Posts: 229
Founded: Apr 19, 2021
Ex-Nation

Postby Caliland » Sun Jan 09, 2022 9:35 am

Madrinpoor wrote: -snip-

Accepted, welcome.

Great Confederacy of Commonwealth States wrote:Hahahaha, I seem to have misread the opening post, Cali :p But nice save on your part, will pay better attention.

Thanks!

Maugrym wrote:So, what's the general timeline we're looking at here?

The end of this week is the end of day 1. But if things move faster, we might cram in day 2 this week. I have plot twists planned for days 2 & 3.
A direct democracy on islands off the coast of California, where government affairs are filmed for a reality TV show and social media is the only way to vote. Member of UAN & ICDN

Check out my political satire RP

Not a joke nation, just heavy-handed with the humor, but can and will be serious if needed.

User avatar
Constaniana
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 25696
Founded: Mar 10, 2012
Democratic Socialists

Postby Constaniana » Mon Jan 10, 2022 6:19 pm

Caliland, should I flesh out my post to describe what Gerard sees in the restaurant, what he orders, and so on, or did you want to have an NPC accost him first?
Join Elementals 3, one of P2TM's oldest high fantasy roleplays, full of adventure, humour, and saving the world. Winner of the Best High Fantasy RP of P2TM twice in a row Choo Choo
Pro: Jesus Christ, Distributism, The Shire, House Atreides
Anti: The Antichrist, Communism, Mordor, House Harkonnen
Ameriganastan wrote:I work hard to think of those ludicrous Eric adventure stories, but I don't think I'd have come up with rescuing a three armed alchemist from goblin-monkeys in a million years.

Kudos.

User avatar
Madrinpoor
Minister
 
Posts: 2220
Founded: Dec 01, 2020
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Madrinpoor » Mon Jan 10, 2022 7:40 pm

Constaniana wrote:Caliland, should I flesh out my post to describe what Gerard sees in the restaurant, what he orders, and so on, or did you want to have an NPC accost him first?

Yeah, I kind of talked for Tom Ward in my post, do you want me to change that? I wasn't sure if you wanted to RP all the NPCs or if we could do some of that ourselves.
MT City-state off the coast of Japan: Sumo wrestling, tech startups, Shintō mobs, gay marriage, Bōsōzuku, taiko drums, custom 90s cars, neon signs, skyscrapers, Yakuza, internet, Christians, flashy teen biker gangs, international treaties, inter-city canals, rooftop gardens, Samurai, canned beer and a Shogun.

Brand new member of The Pub RP group!
Yooper High Kingdom wrote:If I could describe Mandrinpoor with one word, it would be this: Slick.
Nevertopia wrote:Madrinpoor? More like madrinWEALTH be upon your family, may your days be happy and your burdens be light.

SupportUkraine!
Save P2TM!
Cuban-American He/him

User avatar
Caliland
Envoy
 
Posts: 229
Founded: Apr 19, 2021
Ex-Nation

Postby Caliland » Tue Jan 11, 2022 6:03 am

Constaniana wrote:Caliland, should I flesh out my post to describe what Gerard sees in the restaurant, what he orders, and so on, or did you want to have an NPC accost him first?

Yeah, have him describe the restaurant and I'll get to the NPC part soon.
Madrinpoor wrote:
Constaniana wrote:Caliland, should I flesh out my post to describe what Gerard sees in the restaurant, what he orders, and so on, or did you want to have an NPC accost him first?

Yeah, I kind of talked for Tom Ward in my post, do you want me to change that? I wasn't sure if you wanted to RP all the NPCs or if we could do some of that ourselves.

For this time, it's fine.
A direct democracy on islands off the coast of California, where government affairs are filmed for a reality TV show and social media is the only way to vote. Member of UAN & ICDN

Check out my political satire RP

Not a joke nation, just heavy-handed with the humor, but can and will be serious if needed.

User avatar
Constaniana
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 25696
Founded: Mar 10, 2012
Democratic Socialists

Postby Constaniana » Tue Jan 11, 2022 9:37 am

Caliland wrote:
Constaniana wrote:Caliland, should I flesh out my post to describe what Gerard sees in the restaurant, what he orders, and so on, or did you want to have an NPC accost him first?

Yeah, have him describe the restaurant and I'll get to the NPC part soon.
Madrinpoor wrote:Yeah, I kind of talked for Tom Ward in my post, do you want me to change that? I wasn't sure if you wanted to RP all the NPCs or if we could do some of that ourselves.

For this time, it's fine.

Sure thing.
Join Elementals 3, one of P2TM's oldest high fantasy roleplays, full of adventure, humour, and saving the world. Winner of the Best High Fantasy RP of P2TM twice in a row Choo Choo
Pro: Jesus Christ, Distributism, The Shire, House Atreides
Anti: The Antichrist, Communism, Mordor, House Harkonnen
Ameriganastan wrote:I work hard to think of those ludicrous Eric adventure stories, but I don't think I'd have come up with rescuing a three armed alchemist from goblin-monkeys in a million years.

Kudos.

User avatar
Nova Catania
Diplomat
 
Posts: 798
Founded: Feb 14, 2021
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Nova Catania » Tue Jan 11, 2022 10:10 am

Are we allowed to do more than one character?
High Schooler from the southeastern US, he/him, hetero, not politically aligned. Well, that was easy


Vladimir Putin is a really bad guy, like a real mean dude.
In all seriousness, though, I hope the people of Ukraine can stay safe.

Go Charlotte FC!

User avatar
Caliland
Envoy
 
Posts: 229
Founded: Apr 19, 2021
Ex-Nation

Postby Caliland » Tue Jan 11, 2022 4:28 pm

Nova Catania wrote:Are we allowed to do more than one character?

Yes, the limit is 2.
A direct democracy on islands off the coast of California, where government affairs are filmed for a reality TV show and social media is the only way to vote. Member of UAN & ICDN

Check out my political satire RP

Not a joke nation, just heavy-handed with the humor, but can and will be serious if needed.

User avatar
Constaniana
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 25696
Founded: Mar 10, 2012
Democratic Socialists

Postby Constaniana » Tue Jan 11, 2022 7:39 pm

Constaniana wrote:
Caliland wrote:Yeah, have him describe the restaurant and I'll get to the NPC part soon.

For this time, it's fine.

Sure thing.

Post edited accordingly.
Join Elementals 3, one of P2TM's oldest high fantasy roleplays, full of adventure, humour, and saving the world. Winner of the Best High Fantasy RP of P2TM twice in a row Choo Choo
Pro: Jesus Christ, Distributism, The Shire, House Atreides
Anti: The Antichrist, Communism, Mordor, House Harkonnen
Ameriganastan wrote:I work hard to think of those ludicrous Eric adventure stories, but I don't think I'd have come up with rescuing a three armed alchemist from goblin-monkeys in a million years.

Kudos.

User avatar
Nova Catania
Diplomat
 
Posts: 798
Founded: Feb 14, 2021
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Nova Catania » Fri Jan 14, 2022 6:37 am

Character Application


Name: Gene Clark
Sex: male
Age: 40s
Appearance: Bruce Willis?

Position: local news writer

Personality: Gene is a kind, friendly family man, he will chat people up and withstand their conversation even if it's boring. He is not as outgoing or over-the-top as some of his coworkers, and looks quite reserved compared to them.
Skills: putting up with his coworkers
Weaknesses: he is not as politically knowledgeable as some of his coworkers
Likes: the Mets, his family, his job (before the switch to politics)
Dislikes: his job (after the switch)
Goals: to raise his kids right

Biography: Gene was born and raised in a suburb outside New York. He met his wife in high school, and they went to college together. He studied journalism at a college in upstate New York. After college, Gene & his wife got married and would later have 4 kids. He got a job at the New Amsterdam Daily, and worked his way up to local news writer. After the transition to election coverage, he is less enthused about his job.

Misc. he does not reveal his political standing, so everyone is kind of guessing.
DO NOT REMOVE THIS
High Schooler from the southeastern US, he/him, hetero, not politically aligned. Well, that was easy


Vladimir Putin is a really bad guy, like a real mean dude.
In all seriousness, though, I hope the people of Ukraine can stay safe.

Go Charlotte FC!

User avatar
The Beckett Basement
Civil Servant
 
Posts: 6
Founded: Jan 13, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby The Beckett Basement » Fri Jan 14, 2022 8:39 am

Is this still open for new apps? It looks really fun but I don’t know if you’re still looking for new players :)
-J

User avatar
Talchyon
Negotiator
 
Posts: 5663
Founded: May 05, 2016
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby Talchyon » Fri Jan 14, 2022 12:56 pm

The Beckett Basement wrote:Is this still open for new apps? It looks really fun but I don’t know if you’re still looking for new players :)
-J


Not the OP, but I'd say we're very open. OP said he has some fun planned up ahead and most of what we've been doing has been sandbox up til now.
I'm OP-ing this one - PARAGON INDUSTRIES - A high tech comedy with the kooks, rejects and psychos who work at the once great tech giant that's fallen on bad times. Check out the IC action here!

Also Young Bloods - the long-running superhero RP that I just joined 164 pages in


Louisianan wrote:Talchyon has great comedic writing, that is true.

User avatar
The Beckett Basement
Civil Servant
 
Posts: 6
Founded: Jan 13, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby The Beckett Basement » Fri Jan 14, 2022 2:37 pm

Talchyon wrote:
The Beckett Basement wrote:Is this still open for new apps? It looks really fun but I don’t know if you’re still looking for new players :)
-J


Not the OP, but I'd say we're very open. OP said he has some fun planned up ahead and most of what we've been doing has been sandbox up til now.

Fair enough. Is there anyone that would be useful to have in the rp? I know it’s meant to reflect a real cast of newswriters and columnists, is there anything missing that would be helpful in a newspaper or helpful to the rp? I’m willing to be pretty much anyone, I just want to be useful if I can :)

User avatar
Caliland
Envoy
 
Posts: 229
Founded: Apr 19, 2021
Ex-Nation

Postby Caliland » Fri Jan 14, 2022 3:51 pm

The Beckett Basement wrote:Fair enough. Is there anyone that would be useful to have in the rp? I know it’s meant to reflect a real cast of newswriters and columnists, is there anything missing that would be helpful in a newspaper or helpful to the rp? I’m willing to be pretty much anyone, I just want to be useful if I can :)

Yes, we’re still open for applications. As for something that’s missing, well, feel free to be pretty much anyone. Some ideas are: a travel writer who’s stuck behind a desk, a millennial social media whiz, a crime reporter with a checkered past, stuff like that. Or a Republican who’s tired of Trump making his party look bad. Put your own spin on it.

Talchyon wrote:Not the OP, but I'd say we're very open. OP said he has some fun planned up ahead and most of what we've been doing has been sandbox up til now.

I do indeed have some fun twists ahead ;)
Last edited by Caliland on Fri Jan 14, 2022 3:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.
A direct democracy on islands off the coast of California, where government affairs are filmed for a reality TV show and social media is the only way to vote. Member of UAN & ICDN

Check out my political satire RP

Not a joke nation, just heavy-handed with the humor, but can and will be serious if needed.

User avatar
Caliland
Envoy
 
Posts: 229
Founded: Apr 19, 2021
Ex-Nation

Postby Caliland » Fri Jan 14, 2022 4:36 pm

Nova Catania wrote: -snip-

Sorry I didn’t notice this, accepted. Welcome to The New Amsterdam Daily!
A direct democracy on islands off the coast of California, where government affairs are filmed for a reality TV show and social media is the only way to vote. Member of UAN & ICDN

Check out my political satire RP

Not a joke nation, just heavy-handed with the humor, but can and will be serious if needed.

User avatar
Talchyon
Negotiator
 
Posts: 5663
Founded: May 05, 2016
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby Talchyon » Fri Jan 14, 2022 10:14 pm

The Beckett Basement wrote:
Talchyon wrote:
Not the OP, but I'd say we're very open. OP said he has some fun planned up ahead and most of what we've been doing has been sandbox up til now.

Fair enough. Is there anyone that would be useful to have in the rp? I know it’s meant to reflect a real cast of newswriters and columnists, is there anything missing that would be helpful in a newspaper or helpful to the rp? I’m willing to be pretty much anyone, I just want to be useful if I can :)


I don't know exactly how realistic your character has to be. Mine is a sports reporter who only writes NFL stories - regardless if he's covering baseball, hockey, or politics.

Personally, I'd love to see someone like the person running advertisements in the paper, who has a side job of selling things on the black market.
I'm OP-ing this one - PARAGON INDUSTRIES - A high tech comedy with the kooks, rejects and psychos who work at the once great tech giant that's fallen on bad times. Check out the IC action here!

Also Young Bloods - the long-running superhero RP that I just joined 164 pages in


Louisianan wrote:Talchyon has great comedic writing, that is true.

User avatar
The Beckett Basement
Civil Servant
 
Posts: 6
Founded: Jan 13, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby The Beckett Basement » Fri Jan 14, 2022 10:19 pm

Talchyon wrote:
The Beckett Basement wrote:Fair enough. Is there anyone that would be useful to have in the rp? I know it’s meant to reflect a real cast of newswriters and columnists, is there anything missing that would be helpful in a newspaper or helpful to the rp? I’m willing to be pretty much anyone, I just want to be useful if I can :)


I don't know exactly how realistic your character has to be. Mine is a sports reporter who only writes NFL stories - regardless if he's covering baseball, hockey, or politics.

Personally, I'd love to see someone like the person running advertisements in the paper, who has a side job of selling things on the black market.

Actually that might be a really fun idea. Someone who knows the ins and outs of the underground and has connections with black market sellers. Could be an interesting view on politics too, expose on the darker side of things.

User avatar
Talchyon
Negotiator
 
Posts: 5663
Founded: May 05, 2016
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby Talchyon » Fri Jan 14, 2022 10:29 pm

The Beckett Basement wrote:
Talchyon wrote:
I don't know exactly how realistic your character has to be. Mine is a sports reporter who only writes NFL stories - regardless if he's covering baseball, hockey, or politics.

Personally, I'd love to see someone like the person running advertisements in the paper, who has a side job of selling things on the black market.

Actually that might be a really fun idea. Someone who knows the ins and outs of the underground and has connections with black market sellers. Could be an interesting view on politics too, expose on the darker side of things.


And especially if both - a) he mixes the two up, advertising black market things in the paper; and b) he sells really disturbing things. You could try to come up with the most bizarre things to sell in the paper.
I'm OP-ing this one - PARAGON INDUSTRIES - A high tech comedy with the kooks, rejects and psychos who work at the once great tech giant that's fallen on bad times. Check out the IC action here!

Also Young Bloods - the long-running superhero RP that I just joined 164 pages in


Louisianan wrote:Talchyon has great comedic writing, that is true.

User avatar
Maugrym
Attaché
 
Posts: 73
Founded: Jul 15, 2021
Ex-Nation

Postby Maugrym » Sat Jan 15, 2022 8:44 pm

Unfortunately, I need to drop this. Sorry!
Disqualify Trump for a 2nd term for violating federal law. - Sign the Petition! https://sign.moveon.org/petitions/prosecute-trump-for-stealing-documents

User avatar
The Beckett Basement
Civil Servant
 
Posts: 6
Founded: Jan 13, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby The Beckett Basement » Sun Jan 16, 2022 7:49 am

Character Application


Name: Tommy Anderson
Sex: Male
Age: 31
Appearance: Michael Mckean as Mr. Green

Position: Advertiser

Personality: A surprisingly upbeat person for a guy who works in advertising and illicit trade. He’s not the sharpest hammer in the dishwasher but he does his sincere best and he’s well liked in both circles. So well liked in fact that people often mistake him for an undercover cop. Those who know him well know him as just a really eccentric and charismatic guy who mysteriously seems to find himself tied up with increasingly weird stuff. He really doesn’t seem like the kind of guy to get involved in illicit trade, and yet nobody really questions him on it because he really seems to enjoy it.
Skills: An incredible network of sources in the illicit trade, an incredible network of sources in advertising, charisma to a certain level
Weaknesses: absentminded, a little dumb, overly eccentric and often accidentally mixes his two lives, people are literally always suspicious of him whether or not he really has something to hide
Likes: Cats (He has 4), his wife Adelaide, stolen artwork, telling stories, telenovelas, illicit pets
Dislikes: The organ trade (it’s just so messy!), gas stations, newspapers that steal his advertisers, big conglomerates, his neighbor Jeremy (a policeman who’s been trying to catch Tom for many years now), the drug trade
Goals: To someday sell a Van Gogh painting, locking in an advertising deal with a major conglomerate

Biography: Tommy was born in the sleepy town of Tweed, Ontario, a place where nothing really happened and nobody every really went anywhere. Tommy’s parents were good citizens who worked regular small town jobs and had a regular small town life. Tommy had never had any real aspirations of getting out of Tweed, moving to the big city or going off on some adventure.

That was until his 18th birthday when his parents dropped the bombshell that Tommy was actually adopted, a kid they’d taken from an old friend who couldn’t take care of a child in his line of work. But more than that, it was revealed then that his real father had died many years ago and left Tommy a sizable inheritance to acquire on his 18th birthday. It was from there that Tommy went to America to acquire his inheritance.

His inheritance, however, was apparently mostly fictional. His father had been involved in black market trade for much of his life but had donated almost all of his excess money to charity and when Tommy reached America (NYC to be specific), his inheritance turned out to be a single notebook, tattered and torn, that held every single seller his father had ever worked with. Pages and pages of phone numbers, notes, warnings, even one or two names that were simply crossed out, unable to read.

That notebook kickstarted Tommy’s rise in the world of black market trade, an 18 year old kid who somehow had a more expansive network of sources than certain sects of the mafia. And for a small town kid, he was surprisingly good at it.

He got involved in the Daily through a set of increasingly odd coincidences. At the time, his girlfriend (now wife) Adelaide worked at the Herald, and mistaking the Daily’s office for hers, he’d gone in to surprise her for lunch. Of course, nobody recognized him and it was assumed that he was the new job applicant who was supposed to be in for a lunch-time meeting. Tommy, not wanting to cause a ruckus, obliged and was accidentally hired as an advertiser because “Goddamnit he was just so good at it!”. From there, he just never said anything and eventually settled into the fact that he now worked at the Daily and nobody ever really questioned him.

Misc. A good portion of the Daily’s writers thought his name was Hal for many years due to the hiring mix-up.
DO NOT REMOVE THIS

User avatar
Caliland
Envoy
 
Posts: 229
Founded: Apr 19, 2021
Ex-Nation

Postby Caliland » Sun Jan 16, 2022 7:54 am

The Beckett Basement wrote: -snip-

Accepted! Welcome to The New Amsterdam Daily.
A direct democracy on islands off the coast of California, where government affairs are filmed for a reality TV show and social media is the only way to vote. Member of UAN & ICDN

Check out my political satire RP

Not a joke nation, just heavy-handed with the humor, but can and will be serious if needed.

User avatar
The Beckett Basement
Civil Servant
 
Posts: 6
Founded: Jan 13, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby The Beckett Basement » Sun Jan 16, 2022 11:13 am

Sorry to ask this, but since the rp has already begun, where and how should I jump in in a way that makes sense? I don’t know what I’m doing :p

User avatar
Nova Catania
Diplomat
 
Posts: 798
Founded: Feb 14, 2021
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Nova Catania » Sun Jan 16, 2022 11:35 am

The Beckett Basement wrote:Sorry to ask this, but since the rp has already begun, where and how should I jump in in a way that makes sense? I don’t know what I’m doing :p

Just a suggestion, but maybe you could say that he was on vacation or something.
High Schooler from the southeastern US, he/him, hetero, not politically aligned. Well, that was easy


Vladimir Putin is a really bad guy, like a real mean dude.
In all seriousness, though, I hope the people of Ukraine can stay safe.

Go Charlotte FC!

User avatar
Madrinpoor
Minister
 
Posts: 2220
Founded: Dec 01, 2020
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Madrinpoor » Sun Jan 16, 2022 2:48 pm

The Beckett Basement wrote:Sorry to ask this, but since the rp has already begun, where and how should I jump in in a way that makes sense? I don’t know what I’m doing :p

I had my character report for duty on his first day, technically as a freelance agent who has been hired by the newspaper to cover the election. I'm not sure that would work that well for Tommy Anderson, since he works in advertising, maybe some sort of leave he was off on? Also, I don't think it's even been a day yet in the RP so honestly you should be fine with him coming in late. I've had to resort to unspecific dates on my IC posts.
MT City-state off the coast of Japan: Sumo wrestling, tech startups, Shintō mobs, gay marriage, Bōsōzuku, taiko drums, custom 90s cars, neon signs, skyscrapers, Yakuza, internet, Christians, flashy teen biker gangs, international treaties, inter-city canals, rooftop gardens, Samurai, canned beer and a Shogun.

Brand new member of The Pub RP group!
Yooper High Kingdom wrote:If I could describe Mandrinpoor with one word, it would be this: Slick.
Nevertopia wrote:Madrinpoor? More like madrinWEALTH be upon your family, may your days be happy and your burdens be light.

SupportUkraine!
Save P2TM!
Cuban-American He/him

User avatar
Caliland
Envoy
 
Posts: 229
Founded: Apr 19, 2021
Ex-Nation

Postby Caliland » Mon Jan 17, 2022 9:43 am

Madrinpoor wrote:
The Beckett Basement wrote:Sorry to ask this, but since the rp has already begun, where and how should I jump in in a way that makes sense? I don’t know what I’m doing :p

I had my character report for duty on his first day, technically as a freelance agent who has been hired by the newspaper to cover the election. I'm not sure that would work that well for Tommy Anderson, since he works in advertising, maybe some sort of leave he was off on? Also, I don't think it's even been a day yet in the RP so honestly you should be fine with him coming in late. I've had to resort to unspecific dates on my IC posts.


The first IC day is ending, so you can introduce your new characters tomorrow. Monday that is. So if anybody has loose ends, I suggest you tie them up so we can get to the next IC day.
A direct democracy on islands off the coast of California, where government affairs are filmed for a reality TV show and social media is the only way to vote. Member of UAN & ICDN

Check out my political satire RP

Not a joke nation, just heavy-handed with the humor, but can and will be serious if needed.

User avatar
SOUTH OLPEN
Minister
 
Posts: 2978
Founded: Jan 23, 2021
Democratic Socialists

Postby SOUTH OLPEN » Mon Jan 17, 2022 10:04 am

Character Application


Name: Grant Kispeak
Sex: Male
Age: 51
Appearance: Think Swanson from Parks and Rec

Position: Albany correspondent.
Personality:
Grant is a very oriented guy. He speaks only when needed, and would never touch any group activity. Het he is seen as a grouch, but he is really never mean, he simply doesn't speak. Baby boomers would hate his work ethic, with him never doing any more than he is contractually obligated. He is rumored to have a family, but he ignores people whenever questioned.
Skills: Very matter of the fact, gets papers out fast due to his disregard of time wasting social activities.
Weaknesses: Non communicative, he doesn't go to Albany and bases his articles on other newspapers so he is limited in scope.
Likes: Not talking to coworkers, being left alone, and alligators.
Dislikes: People nagging him, hippies, and his boss.
Goals: Retirement.

Biography: (At least one paragraph)
Grant Kipspeak was born in Staten Island, New York, New York, USA to Harold Kipspeak and Flourence Inherdoson (maiden name). His father was distant, and was known as an asshole. He went to a private Catholic school, but they were very emotionally abusive. He moved to New York with his now divorced mother, and he went to Xavier High School. After studying hard, he was accepted to the college of William and Mary with a degree in public speaking. He wished to be a motivational speaker, but he settled as a dead souled journalists once his bills came due. He has a girlfriend in the form of 42 yr old Francis Hertfick, and he is getting enough money to propose. He grew a mild dependancy on smoking when inflation stopped him from getting a house, but after testing it was decided he was not technically addicted.

Misc.
DO NOT REMOVE THIS
The Scezonian Telegram Olpen Leaves Global Entene |  Coup Overthrows Galapagos; To Hold Election Soon  |  Zarnicovia Occupied by Russia, Armenia

Male (he/him), American, liberal, represents a slightly exaggerated version of my views, we want mod transparency, greatest wishes to Greatest States of America.

The Blaatschapen wrote:They could serve as a distraction.

Of course, in modern combat, that's what the French are for.

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