Office of the Parliamentary Secretary to the Treasury
9 Downing Street"Yes, I did hear him speak outside the courts", nodded the undersecretary to the parliamentary secretary to the treasury upon being summoned into the office, "we did advise very strongly for him to make no comments on the matter after the Nazi incident", he added seemingly to his defense taking a seat across from Williamson "but a man is like human chatterbox, never really did learn to keep his mouth shut".
"An absolute buffoon", chimed in the parliamentary secretary to the treasury taking a sip from his tea as he added "just slightly paler and less orange one, why was he appointed anyways"?
"I believe the general sentiment for the prime minister was that it'd be far better to keep him inside where he can pee outside rather than keeping him outside resulting in him peeing inside", responded the cabinet secretary, "not to mention we're full steam ahead on leaving the European Union, and she was running short on promising candidates who supported the right side of the debate".
"That assumes he can be house trained to pee outside and won't just take a leak where he is standing, in our plates", countered the parliamentary secretary quite obviously fed up with having the issue come across his desk on a virtually weekly basis "you know making sure the entire parliamentary party and the cabinet behaves themselves takes quarter of my time, managing with him takes up half of my time, and fixing his mess takes up the remaining quarter."
"Well that's why we have you, to crack the whip and house train people like him, so they know where to pee, where not to pee and when to keep their mouth shut"
"Why can't we kick him upstairs, it'd be a great honor for him and we'd not need to deal with this nonsense every single time; say he's getting an honor for his services to", drawing out his words to give a momentary thought, parliamentary secretary adds "bicycles or something like that".
"I'm rather doubtful the lords will support the government in any bill in the future if we make them put up with him", the undersecretary adds rather softly.
"So nothing different than now then", jibes back the parliamentary secretary putting down his cup to lean back.
"Very droll, however unfortunately Daniels is entirely correct - the lords is entirely out of the question. We need reliable people to vote through our bills, they are not bound by public vote and we need their favor", standing up to leave the cabinet secretary adds "in any event, he should be arriving shortly so please do deal with him, and figure out a way to fix this".
Picking up the phone which started ringing from an internal number, almost too perfectly on time with the cabinet secretary departure the parliamentary secretary's face changes to far more stern as he answers "yes, send him in please". As the minister entered the room, Williamson stands up, announcing sarcastically "The man who knows more about law than our supreme court judges, I'm rather gland to have you here, again". Interrupting before the minister has an opportunity to speak again he continues "so legally speaking what employment rights does a washed up minister who can't keep his gob shut for a minute, and who lost the bid to be leader of the party has if his prime minister decides he's too much trouble than is worth"?
"What are you talking about, the people loved my speech - its apparently getting published. The judges might not have liked it but I'm pretty sure now no one cares about them. We'll be famous as the people who stood up to-" the minister answers confidently taking a seat in the broad sofa.
"Stood up to the enemies of the people?" Williamson interrupts angrily "remember how that went for the mail? We're already facing criticism for not standing up strongly enough for the independence of the judiciary from last time, we're legal professionals crying war and now you go on to further impeach our credibility with the judiciary by questioning their competence?" While the minister attempts to correct him, he keeps talking over "And what was that silly idea about parliament getting a vote in judges appointments because otherwise it'd be undemocratic, this could literally cost the government the lords ".
The minister finally managing to get a word in simply states "I didn't say that, I merely suggested we should look towards emulating the parliamentary hearings like with committees and you're overreacting it''ll blow over fine."
"God damn it Boris!", Williamson shouts visibly exasperated, "the attorney general has threatened to resign because he can't face his colleagues if he is in government that looks like it is looking to curtail independence of the judiciary and we've had already had conversation with the bar association who're demanding your head. If you don't put this right, you will be fired tomorrow over you sick mother or something, as prime minister announces that there has been no plans to implement parliamentary hearings over the judges and thanks the judges for their devoted service."
"Wait, what but -"
Noticing him fluster, Williamson continues to land the punches "you're going to turn up the parliament today in evening representing the government, it'll be well covered by press because it'll be the first one since the verdict. I will talk to some backbenchers into give you nice openings and you will give a speech defending and praising the judiciary and the judges independence like your life depended on it. Otherwise you can leave your resignation letter with the cabinet office on the way out".
Foreign Secretary, Boris Johnson Says The Brexit Vote To Be Confidence Vote
1 hour ago
Boris Johnson, who had come under increasing pressure over his stance towards the judiciary appears to have made a u-turn over the course of the day, now suggesting in his statements in house of commons that he is indeed for independently selected the house of commons, and praised the judges for their bravery and wise words when distancing themselves from the political implications of their rulings. The minister further went on to state "it is inherently British to respect the rule of the law", and further indicated that whilst he himself was disappointed with the verdict, the government will not seek to appeal it to the European court in response to SNP benches questioning if government would appeal to the European courts to uphold government's perceived right to take back control by removing parliament from the decision making.
However following heated exchange with UKIP MP, Douglas Carswell on if this sudden turn around was because of government never really wanted to go ahead with Brexit, recognizes it will loose the vote and just realized courts had handed then get out of jail free card, the minister responded "that is entirely preposterous suggestion and government was very committed to putting a bill to a vote shortly and demonstrating to the member that government holds the confidence of both parliament and nation".
Whilst the government is widely expected to win the parliamentary vote, it is nevertheless a rather bold move to make it a matter of confidence for the government.