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World Anarchic Union
Negotiator
 
Posts: 6276
Founded: Feb 10, 2015
Left-wing Utopia

Postby World Anarchic Union » Fri Jan 06, 2017 3:25 pm

Dublin, Ireland
The whole cabinet was there. Some calm, others shaking and visibly nervous. Reports were constantly coming in, of the collapse of the defense lines in Donegal, attacks across the country, Limerick facing huge battles. Some were thinking this was a return of the Troubles, others felt this was more serious. Every foreign volunteer that arrived and was caught was thrown in a jail. It seemed that this new IRA had on their sights Northern Ireland as well. Some in the heavily guarded room began praying.
Suddenly, a door was opened and heavily armed security men entered the room. A man was inside the circle they had formed.
"Ladies and gentlemen, we have a problem." said Enda Kenny, addressing his cabinet.
"Ireland is experiencing an armed insurgency, at a size that hasn't been seen since the Civil War. But, we won that war and we are going to defeat these insufferable pests now! I will declare a state of emergency in our nation since it is necessary for the restoration of order! And, if things continue to worsen, I will have to ask Britain for help. Perhaps, even troops to enter Ireland.
A man spoke up, coughing.
"Sir, you know that if we do that, public support will grow for these rebels. It is estimated that a 25% of people support them and this percentage is growing. This will surely skyrocket it. Not even mentioning the recent imperialist moves made by our neighbors."
"I know. But, it may just be our only hope."

Sinn Fein HQ, after the declaration of a state of emergency
Loud voices could be heard from inside the offices of the third largest party in Ireland and the second in Northern Ireland.
"... This is outrageous and we are sitting on our asses, doing nothing! How truly different are we from them? Did we not take up arms not such a long time ago? It is estimated that a majority of our supporters view this new IRA favorably and I believe so should we!" yelled a woman, red from anger.
"Are we not a legal party, fighting for justice and Ireland inside a legal framework?" asked another man.
"We all know the government is suspecting us! We must fight for justice and Ireland through any means necessary!"
"What do you say, Gerry?" This was the voice of an older man, who was looking at the head of the party.
Gerry Adams, with a lowered head, was listening and weighing in on the arguments. When he raised it, he seemed to have made up his mind.
"I have fought for Ireland for my entire life. I will not stop now. They are somewhat different from us. But we both have a fighting spirit and a desire to liberate Ireland. I say, since our supporters believe the same,mwe do something about it."
The people in the room clapped. But Gerry Adams knew this would be a beginning to something new. Either great or horrible.

Donegal, Ireland
Bullets were wheezing above them as they made quickly their way across the valley. A military outpost overlooked it and, while it was dark and neither side could see well, the soldiers wanted to try their hardest. Some time later, and with some mild injuries, the rebels arrived at an outpost of their own. There, two other groups were waiting for them.
One could see that both of the other groups were battle weary. Some hands and legs were tied in bandages, while bloodstains could be found on their shirts. A man, wearing the IRA initials on his shirt spoke first.
"Good news, comrades. Letterkenny has been liberated."
Hoorays could be heard across the valley, demoralizing the soldiers in the outpost.
The man continued.
"We come from there. It was bloody for both sides but we managed to take the town. Our next move is moving southwards. If we manage to control Donegal, we have more bargaining chips. Meanwhile, I have been informed that the assault on Limerick is continuing. Many have fallen there and the port is heavily contested. Enda Kenny has declared a state of emergency, as expected and we have gained an ally: Sinn Fein, it seems, have reconsidered their previous stance and have allied with the commune.
Now, you are needed here. We will begin clearing villages and move on the city of Donegal. And we will wish all the best for our comrades in Limerick."
The IRA flag waved in the night sky, as the rebels marched under the dim moonlight. The military outpost now stood silent, the soldiers retreating to defend further south.

Ottawa, Canada
A man, wearing a dark grey suit exited the vehicle he had arrived with. Inside a backpack he was holding were a bottle of water, a lunchbox, some spare clothes and a handgun. The city was lively and its people quite happy, but he wasn't. He hadn't come to Ottawa to have a good time. Hehad arrived in the city with one goal and one goal only: kill Boris Johnson.

Belfast, Northern Ireland
The police were now more prevalent around the city. The perpetrators of the robbery and assault were either captured or killed.
A woman had just left a government building. Entering it with an excuse for a complaint, she had left a bag filled with explosives inside of it. Using a disposable mobile phone and with a voice disrupter, she identified both the office and the police of the presence of the bomb. Seeing the employees evacuate the building safely, she softly pressed the button. Belfast was shaken as the building exploded in a flash of fire. Later that day, the IRA published a manifesto regarding recent events.

Commune of Ireland- Irish Republican Army

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We, the Commune of Ireland and the Irish Republican Army take full responsibility for the bombing in Belfast. It was a response to the imperialist actions of the New British Empire in the Fiji Islands. The British State is attempting to regain their imperial possessions once more! Direct action in the Fiji Islands, a defenseless nation, while advocating for a strengthened Commonwealth which will allow their authoritarian rule to spread like the poisonous venom it is across the globe. People of the Commonwealth, don't allow that! Rise! Fight! Liberate yourselves! Don't let the British and your local, corrupt leaders sell you out and use you!

We are fighting against the Irish "Free State" with all our force, liberating village after village! They have shown their true colors, declaring a state of emergency! They will soon give up completely the facade of a democracy! Something which certain parties and factions have realized and have allied with the democratic forces of the IRA and the Commune. Many of our brothers and sisters have died for this cause and we owe it to them to continue the struggle! We will liberate Limerick! We will liberate the whole of Ireland and march on Dublin as its people open their doors to us! We will defeat the Irish Free State and the New British Empire! For a new world! For peace, freedom and equality! For the liberation of the whole of Ireland! For the liberation of the world!

LONG LIVE IRA! LONG LIVE THE COMMUNE! LONG LIVE THE REVOLUTION!
THE PEOPLE UNITED WILL NEVER BE DEFEATED!
VIVA ROJAVA!
VIVA EZLN!

PRO: Anarcho-Communism, Libertarian Socialism, Communalism, Revolutionary Catalonia, Council Communism, Direct Democracy, Ecology, Internationalism, Pro-Choice, Palestine, Feminism, LGBTQ+ Rights


ANTI: Capitalism, Imperialism, NATO, Fascism, Authoritarianism, Nationalism, (Neo)Liberalism, Conservatism, Reformism, Militarism, Misogyny, Racism
Political Compass:
Economic Left/Right: -9.75
Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -8.77

Political Objectives:
Revolutionary
100 Equality, 93 Liberty and 29 Stability

User avatar
Waztaskio
Negotiator
 
Posts: 7077
Founded: Jun 09, 2013
Ex-Nation

Postby Waztaskio » Fri Jan 06, 2017 3:39 pm

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White House

Mike Pence had recently ended the meeting with the NSC, and had discussed some important issues and developments this course of action would take. However, they all came to the conclusion that regardless of what they did in regards to Syria, it would need to be strong and decisive, or it would become a bigger problem. Pence had begun to formulate a diplomatic cable to Syrian President Al-Assad, and only could hope that he would accept the terms.

THIS DOCUMENT IS CLASSIFIED AS TOP SECRET
================================================================================================================
SUBJECT: RESIGNATION REQUEST
CLASSIFICATION: TOP SECRET
AUTHORIZING AUTHORITY: PRESIDENT MIKE PENCE
================================================================================================================

Dear Syrian President Al-Assad,

The time has come for an official end to the bloodshed and war that has plagued Syria for the past six years. The United States of America will no longer turn a blind eye to Syria's blatant disregard for international law, human rights violations, terrorist safe havens, and dictatorship style of governance that has been purged from most other parts of the world. The pages of history are turning, and Syria is going to turn with it, whether you like it or not. It is with my authority as President of the United States, that I demand the following.

  • A complete surrender of Syrian Military forces to the Syrian Democratic Forces.
  • The resignation and arrest of Al-Assad, to be tried in an International Court for war crimes.
  • The release of all foreign nationals including you have unjustly imprisoned.

These demands are not up for negotiation, and we expect a response within seventy-two hours. If this deadline is not met, the United States shall respond with appropriate action.
Signed ---- President Mike Pence.


With this, the cable was sent to the Syrian President, and all Pence could do was wait.
Last edited by Waztaskio on Fri Jan 06, 2017 3:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
British Empire Strikes Back
Negotiator
 
Posts: 5923
Founded: Apr 15, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby British Empire Strikes Back » Fri Jan 06, 2017 3:42 pm

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10th of January 2017- Inside The Sewer, Suva, Fiji



Inside a sewer in the Fijian capital city of Suva, the former leader of the small island nation, Frank Baininamera was hiding out, along with his family and a few of his closest advisors.

He had been hiding out in this sewer not long after the initial invasion and four days was much too long to stay in the wet, smelly darkness below. His wife especially was fed up, and had had enough of hiding out and had decided to make a run for it the day before.

Baininamrra had slipped into a deep paranoia and was in a state of mental breakdown, and was having constant hallucinations. "I will fuck you Your Majesty! And I will kill Prince William for you too", shouted Baininamera as he was humping a hole in the wall of the sewer, suddenly his genitals became stuck in the wall and he could not be freed.

"Fuck you, you be crazy man! I am leaving this shithole!", said the former Vice-President as he packed up his few remaining belongings and made his way up the ladder to the street above.

"Where do you think you're going daddy, I need you!", shouted Baininamera at the former Vice-President as he made his way up ladder, pushing the manhole away, and running for his life onto a busy motorway in the Fijian capital.

Within an hour, the remaining loyal Baininamera followers that had accompanied him in the server and had up and left. Leaving Baininamera alone, stuck to a wall, screaming to himself.




2 Hours Later-

The former Vice-President had hastily met with the victorious British forces to make a deal. He would surrender Fiji to the British, and give up the location Baininamera, in exchange for his freedom, and some compensation.

The British broadcast the location of Baininamera on Twitter and on television, and within minutes, there were hordes of people, mostly Indians, rushing into sewers. Baininamera was brutally ripped apart, limb by limb, by the angry mob.

Now the last vestiges of Fiji's dictatorship, and of it's independence were gone. Now Fiji's eternal destiny lied with the British once again.




12th of January 2017- The British Overseas Territory of Fiji



Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth II and Prime Minister Boris Johnson toured the new British territory, Fiji.

They were treated to a grand parade, with hundreds of thousands of Fijians in attendance and even more watching the parade on television. Boris would stay for the day, and Her Majesty would stay a few days, basking in the glory of her restoration as Queen of Fiji.

The Queen began a short speech commemorating the occasion,

"Hello, and thank you to you all for being in attendance at this momentous occasion. It is my honour to represent the great Fijian people as your Queen once again. I assume you all that the future for these islands and this nation is very bright indeed! I look forward to leading Fiji to greatness and unleashing it's full potential. Thank you for persevering though the 47 difficult ears of oppression, and I thank you for continued loyalty to me and to the crown. The 12th of January shall hereby be known as Fijian Liberation Day, and shall be a paid holiday for people around the islands, the country, and the Commonwealth at large. Fiji has much potential and a bright road ahead, and I shall be immensely proud to serve as your Queen for the rest of my days. Thank you.", said Queen Elizabeth II to immense applause and she got off stage and shook hands and spoke with people in the audience.

Fiji would soon stop printing the Fijian Dollar and transition to the Pound Sterling before transitioning to the Commonwealth Pound. The flag would be changed back to the pre-1970 flag, and the British would encourage emigration from Britain and across the Commonwealth, increase the proportion of Europeans to 25% up from 4% today, and increase Indian population to be the largest group in Fiji. The island would be further developed and opened up to foreign and British businesses, tourists would be welcome more and the the utility and telecommunications infrastructure, as well as the transportation infrastructure, would be upgraded. Her Majesty's Government wanted Fiji to become the Hawaii of the U.K. And it appeared that would come to pass.

Now with Fiji firmly under control, Royal Navy flotillas and Royal Air Force planes headed towards the Indian Ocean, where the next target for liberation to commence...


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GOV UK
@GOVUK

The United Kingdom would like to wish the people of Fiji and The Commonwealth a Happy Fiji Day! #HappyFijiDay

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2:01pm - 12/01/17



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GOV UK
@GOVUK

HMG condemns Brazil for it's recent undemocratic actions and will
be cutting off all relations with the current government, and we will propose sanctions against them in the European Parliament. We send our condolences to those who fought for democracy that were killed for their beliefs. We will send a 250 person peacekeeping force to Brazil to try to prevent human rights abuses like this from happening again.#MakeFijiBritishAgain #FreeBrazil #TemerNeedsToGo


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3:21pm - 06/01/17



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GOV UK
@GOVUK

HMG condemns the IRA for their attacks in Belfast and Limerick, we offer condolences for all those lost. We shall bring down the IRA and work closely with our great allies, Ireland and EU, on combating this threat. We urge all residents of Belfast to remain sheltered in place until further notice from your local authorities. All attackers have been eliminated and are no longer a threat to the public. #BelfastAttack #PrayForBelfast

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6:12pm - 06/01/17


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Boris Johnson
@BorisJohnson

I'm so fucking angry! IRA YOU ARE FUCKING DONE!!! @EndaKenny, @JeanClaudeJuncker, @FrancoisHollande, @MichaelTrudeau, @NarendraModi, send me a PM and we can talk about the next steps. (Also Francois sorry I didn't reply to your letter yet) WE WILL HAND YOUR ASSES TO YOU IRA FUCKS!!! We will peacefully restore order with our regional allies in Èire!#FuckTheIRA #MotherfuckersGonnaPay

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4:00 pm 12/1/17

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Last edited by British Empire Strikes Back on Fri Jan 06, 2017 4:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.
A World In Disarray- 2017: Join Now!
Proud Jewish Progressive Democrat!
Hillary Clinton Is Our Legitimate President! Gore/Newsom/Sanders/Brown/Cuomo/The Rock 2020

"My daughter is a sex object, our favorite activity to do together as father and daughter is have sex.", Anti-Semite, Racist, Sexist, Mentally-Ill, Morbidly-Obese, Extremely-Low IQ, King of The Lunatics, Donald Trump.

User avatar
Great Nepal
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 28677
Founded: Jan 11, 2010
Ex-Nation

Postby Great Nepal » Fri Jan 06, 2017 3:50 pm

Berlin, Germany
1st January 2017

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3. 2. 1., the announcer on stage speaks into the loudspeaker as the central clock counts down into seconds, 0 the Brandenburg gate erupts into life as lasers light up the crowd and the building while above the fireworks explode with almost concerning precision just as words come out of the announcers mouth; few seconds latter the crowd follows in the deafening celebrations, putting behind them the year which seemed like an eternity concocted by the devil himself. Within minutes the gate was once again covered with explosion, one that was set up perhaps without consent of the organizers judging by the faces of most on stage, as the hydraulics float up a glass structure spelling out 2016 just long enough attention of the crowd before exploding with predictable results. At least the crowd didn't seem to mind, as judged by the second cheer erupting front he crowds as those unaware in stage try to get back their bearings, trying not to step on the fragments covering the stage - which not sharp they still hurt.

"Why don't we do this every year", Joachim commented pouring a glass of champagne as he chuckled over at the exploding sign "and that should happen far more frequently"

"Because then Maizière would have a heart attack", she replied grabbing the filled glass of campaign from his hands "thank you for the drink", she added teasingly. "And doing this every year needs me to be in office for ever."

"No, no just while I'm around. Say next ten years or so', he answered equally in juvenile manner, attempting but failing to grab the glass back

Twisting the glass over arm to the other hand she continued, "well in that case I thi-" as the two were interrupted by loud knock on the door. "I told them not to disturb me for the day" she added with definite annoyance, taking a gulp of the remaining drink before opening the door, "Maizière, what is it?"

"Madam chancellor, sorry to disturb you but it is urgent - there was an explosion in Munich during new years eve celebrations. We originally confused it for fireworks but we've started getting reports of deaths, we're not yet sure on the numbers", the minister for interiors replied solemnly.

As color drained from her face there was a moment of deathly silence before she answered "any evidence of organised effort?"

"Unlikely, from our early reports most likely a solo attack from islamic extremist but we're still trying to identify him", closing the door behind him he continued "we have been going through the cameras and we have a suspect".

"You should lead with that", she replied visibly less tensed "so Bavarian police have him in custody?"

Shaking his head Maizière responds "not quite, we're pretty certain he's in Austria by now - his car crossed into Piding half an hour ago".

"Start pursuing him and get me the Austrian ambassador, we don't want to be stepping on toes", he said clearly exasperated.

"He's apparently ill and can't meet at the moment", Maizière answered, appending "according to his secretary"

"Like hell he's ill, tell him to stuff his mouth full of aspirin and get here - he can puke if he wants, we'll give the cleaning staff a new years bonus. If my first address the nation of the new years has to be to announce terrorist attack I better have the head of the motherfucker who did it" Merkel scowled back

"Ma'am I'm not sure that'd work with not stepping on any one's toes. I'll try to get in touch with the Austrian interior ministry instead"

"After you tell the Bavarian police to find him. Its still an active pursuit situation, that easily give us sufficient grounds to pursue our investigation."

"If you think it best", he responds forcing himself to smile although it is evident from under his smile that he is severely biting his tongue, to the point that it might soon start bleeding profusely.

Piding, Bavaria
Polizeidirektor Klaudia waited at the side of the Autobahn pacing around the three cruisers and a police van holding her phone expediently, she was supposed to not be at work today - it being new years and whatnot, but I suppose holidays can be cut short when people start dying. "Yes, perfect - I did inform you we could've gone in much earlier", he responds with a sigh as the phone call finally arrives before turning towards the assembled team "remember the mission, I'll get down to their interiors ministry, see if we can get access to some information while you start some questioning and it is an active pursuit", he clarified one more time before getting back in the first car headed to the Austrian border - marked by nothing but a sign on the autobahn. While the initial kilometers were largely unmolested, as the team entered the city of Salzburg, there were Austrian police cars flashing their red and blue siren indicating right.

"Go on ahead, I'll deal with this", announced Klaudia over the radio as her cruiser indicated left while the rest took no notice of the car behind them - after all the Austrian police had no jurisdiction over German officers - this was German investigation, over terrorist attack in Germany for gods sake; incidental nature of Austrian claim over the soil is clearly an entirely tangential distraction. As the Austrian officer approached the cruiser he started slightly humorously "I keep telling you Bavarian new years celebration is terrible compared to the Salzburg one, finally we've official proof - unfortunately however you just missed the firework show".

"Unfortunately, not exactly what we were here for Inspektor", Klaudia spoke far more seriously "Polizeidirektor Klaudia, pleasure to make your acquaintance - we were hopping you'd be able to help us, there was an attack in Munich and we're pursuing a suspect across borders".

"Well I've not received any notification of that, and I've been on this route for last five hours and we haven't had anyone with German plates coming from that direction so I'd recommend you wait till the morning and discuss it with the Sergeant", the office responds firmly.

"Unfortunately that's not going to be possible, as I said this is a active pursuit which means we have jurisdiction to operate here. I'm merely looking for some assistance in case someone has spotted the suspect driving here", she answers leaning forward - staring right in his eyes.

"As I have said there haven't been cars going through here like the ones you said, so this isn't a hot pursuit - seems more like you're trying to do investigation and that is something you'll need to talk to sergeant about".

"Very well, so where is the sergeant?"

"At home, with his wife and children. He has the day off, and it is one in the morning. I can get you and your people few rooms in the hotel for tonight, and you can meet and discuss the issue tomorrow."

Visibly frustrated at lack of progress Klaudia steps out of the car, standing few inches above the Austrian officer as she speaks "we won't be needing the hotel, by tomorrow the suspect will have likely fled Austria so we'd rather finish out operation and put him in our prisons. I hope I can have corporation of the your forces on the matter", she speaks with a forced honeyed voice, and a smile holding out a hand.

"You're in Austrian jurisdiction ma'am, and I'd suggest until you have proper authorization to not take official actions. Otherwise we will need to make arrests for impersonating an officer of the law."

"I am an officer of the law", she spits out "I think we can do this without help of the Austiran police but next time you need to come up North - do remember actions have consequences" she answers getting back in the cruiser as it starts to drive off, veering to the right almost running over the officer in the road - when it puts on the red and blue signs. Then things go wrong.


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Süddeutsche Zeitung
@SZ

@Bundespolizei shameful impeding investigation into new year terrorist who murdered single mother Ursula Ackerman and twenty other fathers, mothers and children! #JusticeForUrsula #ShamefulAustria

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13:00 - 02 January 2017




Recipient: Office of His Excellency Président de la République française, François Hollande
Sender: Office of Excellency Bundeskanzlerin der Bundesrepublik Deutschland, Angela Merkel



Greetings monsieur,
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As you're aware the perception of security among the general populance within Europe is deteriorating at a rather alarming pace, and given the attacks both of our people have suffered over the past year such reaction is perhaps not surprising nor without merit; this combined with the perception among the people of inaction from the European Union with regards to situation of refugees has perhaps further driven the populance away from true democratic, liberal principles towards far more demagogue-esque and unpredictable situations in recent elections overseas. Indeed signs of similar stress has been evidenced in both of our nations, and across the European community as a whole - be it in much smaller scale.

Truth be told, I'm rather worried - both French and German republics face elections in matter of months and I fear without evidence of solid action with solid evidence, more people than we foresee will favor less savory characters within our nations, and latter across Europe. Britain has fallen to this trend, in fact it could be argued with some merit they are the trigger for this dark trend, while its choice to leave the European project is rather disappointing it is perhaps not as significant shock as one which'd face the European ideals and the European project as a whole if such forces were to, god forbid win power in France or Germany.

Indeed I've been considering options, and perhaps British departure while disappointing could present an opportunity, they have always been a member who has stood against sensible proposals for harmonization and integration, vetoing plans which sought to harmonize jurisdiction for forces across Europe few years back for instance. I'd like to suggest we potentially revisit such proposals moving forward; proposals such as a dedicated European counter terror force acting to investigate and remove terror threats from across Europe, national forces no longer hindered by red tape while investigating suspects, ability to prosecute for crimes across Europe, a common refugee policy - proposals which will restore faith of electorate in the democracy in our existing structures and make any further dissolution of European Union impossibly difficult.

Looking at the terror reviving in Ireland, at the attacks in German cities, attacks in French cities, I feel we must act to restore the faith in Europe, or loose the institution which has kept peace in the continent for almost a century and give up the ideals of Europe and European Community. Therefore prior to the meeting of European councils in a months time, I'd like to propose our foreign departments and other civil servants work together to draft a unified proposal which will undoubtedly be approved by rest of the membership regarding European policies and institutions on issues around law enforcement, terrorism and refugee, upto and including treaty change.

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Excellency Angela Merkel, Bundeskanzlerin der Bundesrepublik Deutschland
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User avatar
Newne Carriebean7
Negotiator
 
Posts: 6723
Founded: Aug 08, 2015
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Newne Carriebean7 » Fri Jan 06, 2017 10:25 pm

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Democratic People's Republic of Korea
조선 인민의 투쟁은 혁명의 기치에 의해 유나이티드!
Pyongyang

Kim Jong Un's face turned red at the British Newspaper Times front page story that read BRITISH FORCES LIBERATE FIJI FROM EVIL OPPRESSIVE DICTATOR, ripping the paper in half,he cursed at the top of his lungs.
"Damn That old bat, trying to reboot a failed idea of Imperialism, What's next, an African Coup agaisnt a tinpot dictator in Africa?!"
Vito Scalleta merely watched the overweight Korean man swear loudly as his fat hands made short work of the paper.
"Now, I have a solution for this,It's Not a very well thought out idea, but what if, and bear with me if you've heard of this before, but we could establish our own colonies in response to Fiji's oppression by the queen."
Kim Jong Un looked aghast in horror.
"Colonies of Korea?! Next you'll be saying I'm the emperor of Insanity, Why would I, the Leader of the Freest nation on earth blatantly go out of my way to colonize people of another continent? Give me One good reason my Mafian brother from another mother, that I should go out of my way to make life miserable for other people just so we can gain more money from it?!"
"My dear Kim Jong Un,My businesses will thrive, along with your government owned industries,if you work around a few loopholes and make Slavery legal,we can allow more people to join our ranks.The Korean Economy will not only grow, but explode with the new labor in the ranks."
"No! Korea was founded on the principals for freedom for all, Slavery will not be part of my final design, that is final, if you disagree with my Decison, My Kalashikov's over by the door."
"I.. see, so what are we do do about this whole fubar situationa ina Fijia."
"We are to Prepare an Expeditionary force to Fiji, and we shall invite the remnants of the Fijian Dictatorship to Pyongyang in an attempt to mend ties with the former Fijian leaders. We at the same time will Condemn the British for this act of blatant imperialism."
With that, Vito Scalleta calmly walked away as Kim Jong Un began to devour the coffee mug, once the crazed dictatorship had legalized it, he was able to enjoy the fresh smell of pot throughout the nation, another area that he could also trade on the black market with nations where it was illegal and could catch a pretty won or penny or dollar on the black market.

Hamhung,Democratic Peoples' Republic of Korea
General Kai Jong Thai Sat in his room, smoking a hot pipe of marijuana through a bronze tube filled with the lit plant.He was so glad that it had been legalized a short while ago, as it was something for him to get his mind off of the constant stress and work of life.He once had a great deal of loyalty to the Kim regime and their family, but that once strong steel like nigh unbreakable loyalty had eroded over time, and especially with the announcement of "Mafialand" It was a clear indication that Kim Jong Un was a few rounds short of a full magazine, and the fact that he was in bed with the mob didn't help the situation at all. Hell,Twitter had even been allowed in North Korea, a shocking development to even the younger folks of the nation. The Phone Rang and he hastily finished With a sick burn on his elderly hands that made him realize the extending warts that blessed his aging digits.
"General Kai Jong Thai."
"Thai,we have everything ready. The Baker's bun is in the oven and his grandmother just had twins."
"Great News,We shall restore Korea to Sane standards once again,I will not fail my father's past attempt to reign back sanity in the nation."
With that, He simply put the phone back on the hook with a clang,stood up and walked twoards the window. He fully was aware that he was commiting Treason, but he was expected to have the nation get rich again.
Pulling out his Ikorea smartphone, he tweeted in less than 140 characters that the revolution was to begin.
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GnRAILKai JongChai Cheeto240blazeit
@ChaiCheetoser

I'm High right now,Kim's acting Insane, and We Need to Break Off,Smoke some weed, and shove a bomb up Kim Jong Un's behind! The Provinces of South and North Hamgyong,Ryanggang, and Rason shall Join me in the Revolution! Imma declare war on the Mafia and Kim Jong fatass!#Viva La Revolution #420Blazeit #Down with the Dear Nutjob #Drop a Fridge on Vito plz

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10:25pm - 7 1 06
Krugeristan wrote:This is Carrie you're referring to. I'm not going to expect him to do something sane anytime soon. He can take something as simple as a sandwich, and make me never look at sandwiches with a straight face ever again.

Former Carriebeanian president Carol Dartenby sentenced to 4 years hard labor for corruption and mismanagement of state property|Former Carriebeanian president Antrés Depuís sentenced to 3 years in prison for embezzling funds and corruption

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British Empire Strikes Back
Negotiator
 
Posts: 5923
Founded: Apr 15, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby British Empire Strikes Back » Sat Jan 07, 2017 1:02 am

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14th of January 2017- European Parliament, Brussels, Belgium



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British Prime Minister Boris Johnson, along with his Irish counterpart Enda Kenny were at the European Parliament to support the several British and Irish MEPs who co-sponsored and wrote a bill authorizing the deployment of several thousand EUROCORPS troops to the Republic of Ireland, Northern Ireland, and areas of London and different cities in Germany and France in order contain the threat of the IRA, the bill also labeled the IRA as a terrorist organization, strengthened gun control in Ireland, the U.K. and the rest of Europe, increased funding to various security organizations, gave the U.K., Germany, France, Belgium and Ireland's military permission to cooperate more and more free reign in their activities, allowed regular military patrols of residential and commercial areas across the island of Ireland, allowed the police to search the premises of locations with suspected IRA ties, and increased bilateral ties and cooperation between the United Kingdom and Ireland, as well as Germany, France and Belgium.

Moments before voting began, Boris Johnson had a few words, "Please, I beg of you. Vote for this bill, and prevent future terrorist attacks and save lives across Europe. I hope you find it in your heart to vote for this bill, and help safeguard the future of Europe.", said Johnson to raucous applause.

Soon after, the MEPs began their hours-long debate over the bill, with the majority of British MEPs, and many others being in favour, with some smaller nations such as Czechia, being opposed; and after six hours, the final results were in.

Giovanni Giudice MEP, representing Veneto, Italy, read out the final results, "The European Parliament votes on the "Prevention of Terrorism in Europe Act of 2017" are 398- in favour and 353- opposed, the "Prevention of Terrorism in Europe Act of 2017" is passed by 45 votes!", he said to applause from the crowd.

Boris Johnson shook hands with each of the MEPs that voted for the bill, and felt that perhaps Britain deserved to give Europe a chance, and remain influential in Europe despite Brexit. Maybe a Pan-European summit was in order, he thought as he got into a limo towards Brussels airport, as he went back home to London.


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Boris Johnson
@BorisJohnson

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Omg, @KimJongUn you are so funny, because you are so FAT SHORT AND UGLY! Your haircut is wack! Why don't you shut the fuck up and go back to eating you fucking dig soup and drinking bear wine, eh, you sod! DO YOU WANT TO GO OR WOT??? Haha, haha. Jk, you are weak as shit, fatboy! #KoreanFatassMidget #WhereDidYouGetYourHairCutWanker!

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1:07 pm 14/1/17
Last edited by British Empire Strikes Back on Sat Jan 07, 2017 1:49 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Pacificora
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Posts: 3183
Founded: Aug 09, 2016
Ex-Nation

Postby Pacificora » Sat Jan 07, 2017 2:45 am

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2:00pm, Cairo, Egypt, 2017


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Vice-President Ahmed Taavi walked into the massive circular office where the President of the Republic of Egyptian States resided. Ever since the revolution, order had been restored, and people where happy with their new, democratically elected leader. This was a new age for Egypt, and it was going to be a new age for Islam, with the new major player.

<Taavi> "Okay, so we have a couple of things to discuss Mr President."

President Ali looked up from his paperwork and looked VP Taavi directly in the eye.

<Ali> "Okay Taavi, what do we have?"

<Taavi> "Well, we found Ansar Al-Sharia's last major outpost in Cyrenaica, they are currently hiding in the basement of an abandoned hospital in Tazerbo. There are no reported civilians in the area, but we cannot be sure. There have been reports in the area of child kidnapping from Ansar Al-Sharia, but these cannot be properly proved."

<Ali> "Regardless, we should be very careful, the lives of these children are of the utmost importance. Send our third special forces Legion into the area, they aren't too far off from Tazerbo are they? Send in the 14th army Legion just in case to back them up if it is necessary. This military operation is pivotal to our fight on terror in Libya."

<Taavi> "Very wise words Mr President. Okay next on the list is revoking the convention of Constantinople as efforts by imperial European powers to allow easy trade to their Asian colonies. This has been mentioned in the house numourous times, and it has finally reached the executive level. What we propose is essential verification for all ships passing through the Suez Canal, and permission to stop ships passing through the Suez who have breached international law, and will not allow them to pass through until their atrocious actions have been revoked. We are currently seeking permission mainly from the United Kingdom to add a clause to this convention as well as the Russian Federation, and the Federal Republic of Germany. All other signatures come from nations that cannot be represented in this day and age, like the Austro-Hungarian Empire, and the Ottomans."

<Ali> "This seems to make sense, and we would be seen as a mass inforcer of human rights and international law. Plus, it gives us leverage over nations around the world, this is the second busiest water way after all."

<Taavi> "Speaking of the Red Sea, we are looking for closer relations with Hejaz on the Arabian Peninsula. Having close relations with Hejaz does cut off relations with Saudi rather effectively, but there are other options."

<Ali> "Hejaz has a lot of potential and Saudi is declining, so this could work well. It does cut off oil from Saudi, but we have enough oil to supply ourselves for a while before we start Project Hydro."

<Taavi> "And that brings us to Darfur, and well, the dictatorship to the south. Sudan is oppressing its people and oppressing this of other cultures in their nations, like Darfur. We are inviting leaders from the Darfur Liberation Army to Cairo a couple of weeks following the CU meeting in Ottawa. You also have a meeting with the Leader of India who will be stopping over on their way back to Ottawa to discuss the future relations of or two nations and a possible redesign of the Middle East."

<Ali> "Well I guess it's time to begin the first stage of Operation Overthrow isn't it?"

Taavi's face turned extremely serious, and slowly nodded his head.

<Taavi> "I'll inform General Fuquaff."

Taavi stepped out of the room with a brisk stride then at the door, he turned towards President Ali and gave a salute, and got one back. He then walked out, closed the doors, and picked up his government issued phone and put in the number 0031 041 000.

<Taavi> "Commence stage one."

<Fuquaff> "Yes sir"



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The Military Operation in Tazerbo known as Operation Deathaddar was a massive success, with no civilian casualties and all the children remaining in the building were freed. Only one soldier died in the fights. Ansar Al-Sharia was expelled from Cyrenecia and Africa in general, only the first of many to fall under the pressure of the biggest army in Africa.

President Ali boards the plain known as 'The Falcon', the Egyptian Presidential Plane, on a flight to Ottawa to attend the meeting of Commonwealth nations along with security Hussain and Commander Gambela, while Taavi remains in Egypt to run things.
Last edited by Pacificora on Sat Jan 07, 2017 3:15 am, edited 1 time in total.
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World Anarchic Union
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Left-wing Utopia

Postby World Anarchic Union » Sat Jan 07, 2017 4:28 am

Limerick, Ireland
The streets of the city were silent. Men and women, covering their faces walked, wielding weapons. Heavy street fighting was being reported from further inside the city but that borough had been liberated by the IRA. Its flag, alongside the Commune flag were waving in one of the buildings. Reinforcements had been sent, after the high casualties reported by both sides. Sinn Fein supporters had now began fighting alongside the IRA, with the emblem of Ireland on their chests. It was a needed help.
The port was the most heavily contested area. No side could claim victory there. Bodies were littering the streets. The government had tried to send reinforcements by sea, but the heavy assault on the boats made it reconsider their decision. The outcome of the battle for Limerick was still undecided.
Encouraging reports were coming from other areas in Ireland, especially in Donegal and the South. Meanwhile, since the alliance of Sinn Fein and the Commune, Northern Ireland had started experiencing more and and more skirmishes in the streets. Unionists and Secessionists were once again fighting in the bloody city. But, the hopes of the IRA to capture Newbridge were in vain. All the rebels there had either perished or been captured. The IRA was also afraid of the capabilities of the forces that would be deployed in Ireland by the European Union and the UK. They knew that since the announcement of a state of emergency and the announcement of the deployment of foreign troops in Ireland, its support had increased by a wide margin but no one knew whether they could successfully defeat the government.

Dublin, Ireland
A man overlooked the embassy of the United Kingdom. He held a large bag in his hands and knew that the security forces had taken notice of him. He just had to wait for a couple more minutes. Then he heard the loud noise of a bomb and knew that it was his tur. The bomb in question had been placed in the offices of Fine Gael and a warning message had been issued to evacuate the building. This was in response to an announcement made by Kenny two days ago, when he declared that public meetings had been outlawed for the time being, the elections would have to be postponed and foreign forces would enter Ireland "to help get it rid off pests".
What the man was about to do was in response to the UK's imperialist actions and the deployment of British forces in Ireland. After the explosion, he quickly removed the rocket launcher and fired upon the embassy. Before he could be arrested, he turned a small handgun to his head and shouted "Long live the IRA!" before pulling the trigger.

Like in previous attacks, a communique was issued both in paper and online.

Commune of Ireland- Irish Republican Army

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We take full responsibility for the attacks in the Fine Gael offices and the British Embassy in Dublin.
All masks are off. The Irish government has officially knelt before the crown. The Irish Free State is once again prevalent. British boots will step in Irish soil once more. And with them, the killings, the rapes, the enslavement will come again. The imperialists can't satisfy their hunger with defenseless island nations and have now turned their eyes to Ireland. We will defend ourselves, our brothers and our sisters, from their murderous onslaught that they will unleash upon us. Like they have done in the past, like they have done in the Middle East, like they have done in Fiji. The British fascists will not pass! The Clown of Downing Street talks about peacefully restoring order in Ireland. What's so peaceful about British troops entering our homeland? Will it be as peaceful as British involvement in Iraq? In Libya? In Fiji? We are condemned by the same crown that tortures, that rapes, that kills innocent people across the world! We can't stand hypocrisy, especially coming from a manchild who doesn't understand the struggle of not only the Irish men and women but the struggle across the world!

Our regional tyrants have shown their true colors, once again. Taking away right after right, talking of democracy and justice while they make thousands of people suffer, when they establish near dictatorial rule! They have sold out Ireland! They have sold it out to the multinationals, to the New British Empire, to the neoliberals and fascists at the EU! They have earned the title of the Irish Free State. How do you fell, Enda Kenny, knowing that you are a traitor and nothing more? How do you feel when the Irish people reject you? How do you feel when you present the British Empire with Èire in order to stay in power?

Mr Johnson, Mr Kenny, Ms Merkel, Mr Hollande, Mr Juncker know that when the people are angry, when they have a fighting spirit, when they have a fire like ours burning in their hearts, they win. Leaders of the European Union, we ask you to be reasonable and leave Ireland. We do not believe you will throw away the lives of so many soldiers, against a power of good, a power of freedom and democracy.
Mr Kenny know that you will be deposed from the throne you are attempting to build. Know that Ireland will be liberated and its tyrants will be overthrown. You and your new allies in the British Empire are the true terrorists.
And, Mr Johnson know that you have every right to be afraid. Know that the people's will looms over you and justice will come swiftly upon you. Remember, we only have to be lucky once...

LONG LIVE IRA! LONG LIVE THE COMMUNE! LONG LIVE THE REVOLUTION!
THE PEOPLE UNITED WILL NEVER BE DEFEATED!
VIVA ROJAVA!
VIVA EZLN!

PRO: Anarcho-Communism, Libertarian Socialism, Communalism, Revolutionary Catalonia, Council Communism, Direct Democracy, Ecology, Internationalism, Pro-Choice, Palestine, Feminism, LGBTQ+ Rights


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Krugeristan
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Posts: 13149
Founded: Mar 05, 2016
Ex-Nation

Postby Krugeristan » Sat Jan 07, 2017 5:15 am

Waztaskio wrote:


White House

Mike Pence had recently ended the meeting with the NSC, and had discussed some important issues and developments this course of action would take. However, they all came to the conclusion that regardless of what they did in regards to Syria, it would need to be strong and decisive, or it would become a bigger problem. Pence had begun to formulate a diplomatic cable to Syrian President Al-Assad, and only could hope that he would accept the terms.

THIS DOCUMENT IS CLASSIFIED AS TOP SECRET
================================================================================================================
SUBJECT: RESIGNATION REQUEST
CLASSIFICATION: TOP SECRET
AUTHORIZING AUTHORITY: PRESIDENT MIKE PENCE
================================================================================================================

Dear Syrian President Al-Assad,

The time has come for an official end to the bloodshed and war that has plagued Syria for the past six years. The United States of America will no longer turn a blind eye to Syria's blatant disregard for international law, human rights violations, terrorist safe havens, and dictatorship style of governance that has been purged from most other parts of the world. The pages of history are turning, and Syria is going to turn with it, whether you like it or not. It is with my authority as President of the United States, that I demand the following.

  • A complete surrender of Syrian Military forces to the Syrian Democratic Forces.
  • The resignation and arrest of Al-Assad, to be tried in an International Court for war crimes.
  • The release of all foreign nationals including you have unjustly imprisoned.

These demands are not up for negotiation, and we expect a response within seventy-two hours. If this deadline is not met, the United States shall respond with appropriate action.
Signed ---- President Mike Pence.


With this, the cable was sent to the Syrian President, and all Pence could do was wait.


Damascus, Syria


Assad didn't even bother locking the bathroom door as he ran inside, collapsing to his knees in front of the toilet as he was violently ill. This can't be happening! No! I'm not surrendering to terrorists! Why can't he see that?! After his stomach was forcefully emptied, Assad remained in the bathroom, trying to gather his thoughts. I'm not surrendering. Ever. I can't. He took a deep breath, slowly standing up to give his reply.

Re: Resignation Request
Top Secret Classification

President Mike Pence,

Your demands are absurd, as well as your excuses for them. I have been fighting terrorists for the last six years, terrorists committing atrocities your nation has decided to be blind to. I am not accepting any of these terms or demands.

(signed) President Bashar al-Assad
Pro: Trump, Assad, Putin, guns, death penalty, Israel, religion, chocolate, me
Anti: Obama, Clinton, Stalin, Hitler, Communism, ISIS, gay marriage, stupid people, drugs, FSA

This 10,000 [insert random thing here] genocide thing is a meme, right?

The Best of Assad in 2016

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The Tricolour
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Posts: 1213
Founded: May 24, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby The Tricolour » Sat Jan 07, 2017 6:20 am

Belfast, Great Britain

After 25,000 men had been sent to French Guiana, 25,000 men were sent here, with a message from Francois Hollande himself.

To The Armies and Governments of Great Britain and Ireland,

We have grown wary of the Irish terrorists that are assaulting Ireland. Therefore, take these 25,000 men and use them how you wish. They are under your command until this crisis is resolved. Please use them well.

From,
Francois Hollande
President of France


Meanwhile, another telegram was sent to the New IRA,

To the IRA,

We are intervening on the side of Great Britain and Ireland, two of our allies. Our troops have been deployed to Great Britain to help in the effort against you. The attacks in Paris, Nice and many other places are still fresh in our memories, and we cannot stand for this to happen to the government of Ireland. Consider yourselves in a state of war with us.

From,
Francois Hollande
President of France


To avoid any potential attacks, the French delegation to Ireland has been temporarily evacuated for their own safety.
Join Alternis Mundi!

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South Mauristan
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Posts: 387
Founded: Oct 18, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby South Mauristan » Sat Jan 07, 2017 8:19 am

Finally, after years of campaigning the Republic of California Independence Party had achieved its primary goal. In 1 week to the day the registered voting populace of California would vote on whether or not to leave the United States of America. Although the campaign for this was rooted in over 150 years of history, only recently with the election of the conservative, Trump Pence administration had it really taken off and become popular with the majority of people. Many of the polls predicted an outright, land idea victory for the RCIP and this was to be expected after the referendum petition gained 19 million signatures. The leaders of the RCIP new they had a massive challenge ahead in forming a government and nation and then gaining international recognition and legitimacy. In a turbulent world where it seems every nation is taking a different side the liberal RCIP leadership would have to work to restore peace and freedom wherever they can.
♂♀Copy and Paste this in your sig if you know there are 2 genders and didn't fail biology♂♀

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British Empire Strikes Back
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Founded: Apr 15, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby British Empire Strikes Back » Sat Jan 07, 2017 10:28 am

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17th of January 2017- 10 Downing Street, London, United Kingdom



British Prime Minister Boris Johnson was sitting down eating a packet of Walker's crisps while watching "Cuckoo" on his couch, when a strange fat man burst into the room.

"Who the fuck are you???!!!???", shouted Johnson as he shoveled this crisps in his mouth, before pausing the show.

The fat man shook nervously for a moment, before saying, "Prime Minister Johnson, the shared Canadian/Australian/British Embassy in Dublin has been bombed and 100 people are injured, 82 are dead. 48 are British, 10 are Canadian, 2 are Australian, 1 is American and oh 20 are Irish. What shall we do?", said the fat man.

Boris Johnson was so shocked by the news that he spit out all the many crisps and he had in his mouth, as he began to cough. The fat man was now covered in half eaten crisps but proceeded to do the Heimlich maneuver, causing Boris to throw up all over the fat man and the living room.

Boris then sipped some Newcastle, and then what had happened finally sunk in and he then spat it out, covering the fat man in ale and crisps. He then threw his remote at the television set, rendering it worthless.

"What fucking bastards! I will kill them! For interrupting my telly time with bad news! We will match the French amount of troops, so send 25,000 over to the republic at once! I want the border closed, and we must expel any suspicious Irish nationals, and recall all British diplomatic staff in Ireland at once. I order a draft to begin in Northern Ireland, and we will send 25,000 troops over there in addition to the draft! These tossers should fight for their country and now they going to have to! And I want to build a wall! A glorious, magnificent, beautiful, beautiful wall. We must get a wall similar to Trumps! And it must be built within a month's time!", said Boris as he ate his choc pot.

"Yes sir, this shall all be done at once!", said the mystery fat man.

"Also fat man, I don't like you, and whoever you are, Jeeves, I want Stephen Fry to replace you! He is much better at your job! Even though he's a poof!", shouted Boris as he laughed hysterically.

"But I am Foreigb Secretary, sir", said the fat man

"I thought you were the butler all this time... Oh well, he will do a better job, what with that golden voice, eh! Oi! Get out 'ere, before you get kicked out! You bleeding sod, you!", said Johnson as he pushed the screaming and crying fat man out of the room.

Boris then turned the show back on on another telly, and then wrote these tweets:


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Boris Johnson
@BorisJohnson

Roday a tragic event occurred at our embassy in Dublin. The incompetent leadership of @EndaKenny has allowed these attacks to happen because THEY ARE FUCKING WEAK! If they do not step it up, we will have to take a leading role in the situation! 25,000 troops are en route to you IRA fucks, I hope you all look forward to being at the end of a British, Canadian, French and European gun, you disgusting sods!
#FuckTheIRA #DublinAttack #PrayForDublin


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4:00 pm 17/1/17



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Boris Johnson
@BorisJohnson

I'm so fucking angry! IRA YOU ARE FUCKING DONE FOR REAL NOW! You killed all these innocent people from the Commonwealth, and now it is time for you to pay! @Canada, @Australia, send some troops to help out father! WE WILL HAND YOUR ASSES TO YOU IRA FUCKS!!! We will peacefully and successfully restore order by any means possible! #FuckTheIRA #MotherfuckersGonnaPay

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4:35 pm 17/1/17


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GOV UK
@GOVUK

HMG condemns the IRA for their most recent attack at the shared embassy in Dublin, and give our condolences to the families of those who were lost. As an emergency measure all British diplomats are to be recalled from RoI at once.
All public meetings in Northern Ireland are banned and martial law is in effect. If someone violates the martial law they may be arrested or even shot. Save a life, and follow the rules.#MakeIrelandSafeAgain #StandWithDublin


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3:21pm - 17/01/17

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GOV UK
@GOVUK

HMG has announced that all border crossings between the United Kingdom and The Republic of Ireland will be closed as of midnight tonight. The border between the two nations will be fortified with a wall and more heavily guarded to ensure nation security is retained. All Northern Irish airports are closed and freedom of movement between Northern Ireland, and the Republic of Ireland and the rest of the U.K. will be suspended until further notice. #UKnews

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3:33pm - 17/01/17

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GOV UK
@GOVUK

HMG thanks the European, French and Canadian governments for their assistance in these times. Also, all Irish nationals will be subject to further scrutiny to ensure that they have no links to terrorist groups, any suspicious individuals will be detained or deported. #UKnews

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5:21pm - 17/01/17

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GOV UK
@GOVUK

HMG is pleased to announce that @StephenFry will be relocating to London and will serve as the UK's new Secretary of State for Forwign Affairs, the Commonwealth Office is being merged with the Home Office, and the Home Secretary will fill the role.#UKnews

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6:21pm - 17/01/17
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Greater Liverpool
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Democratic Socialists

Postby Greater Liverpool » Sat Jan 07, 2017 10:51 am

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Madrid, Iberia

Palacio de la Junta


A thick cloud of smoke filled the brightened room of the Generalissimo, like a foggy day. Generalissimo Osvaldo Rodrigo was sitting down surrounded by his the ministry of the Junta. Major Isavdio walked into the room through some old decorative doors with files pouring out of arms. The Major calmly walk over to Rodrigo, before giving a fascist salute to him "Generalissimo. Here are the paper you had requested from the war ministry on what is happening on the world." Rodrigo took another puff of the cigarette he was smoking before picking up the files and looking briefly over the different subject matter. Rodrigo looked around at the faces that was surrounding him before throwing the files on the main table in the center of the room. "The British have invaded Fiji with perhaps the craziest prime minister in British history who has clearly a dream of taking back the British empire in the name of Queen country. Communist have risen up in Ireland and are now looking to retake Ireland." Rodrigo quickly got up from his chair and walked over to the window that was allowing light into the smoke filled room of the Junta. "You can see what Raúl wanted us to do. He said that one day the world must be under one rule in order to progress humanity to glory and until that day they will continue to fight and be stuck in their old ways. Only under Fascism can humanity work towards a better world. Gentlemen I believe the time in which the world understands Order and work together as one body, for one goal is coming and now we must be ready for that." He turned around "Major what about the movement in Brazil I told you keep a eye on." Rodrigo slowly walked back to his chair.

"The C.I.E has told me that with the recent shooting of protesters have caused a large swarm of Brazilian people to join their cause however, the government has been quick to place a ban on groups amassing in more then four. That is not only the information I have, it appears that the movement has been gathering weapons recently. One of our agents reported an incident in which a truck drove through a military checkpoint while shouting at the guards. The agent believes that the military in Brazil saw some weapon caches in the truck however they can not confirm it."

"Thank you major. You are dismissed." Major Isavdio gave his salute and left the room. "The powers of the EU are sending forces to Brazil to reportedly keep the peace. I think it is time for Brazil to change, time for them to understand order in this world which needs it so bad. I think we support this integralists movement. Junta-Minister Bustillo, please inform Major De Jimera that him and his company will need to be ready for special operations deployment within 48 hours in the meantime watch this situation closely. Also tell Mr Boris Johnson that I wish to send my Iberian ambassador to talk to him about the recent goings on."




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Iberian State News broadcast

17th of January, 2017


Dear peoples of Iberia, This Generalissimo Osvaldo Rodrigo making my first public address of the year
I wish all a happy new year to all of the people of Iberia and the world.
Let 2017 be the year of Order and strength.

This year will be the 40th anniversary in which the our great union of Iberian people finally came together
as such a have already announced new projects to celebrate this occasion, one of these being that a new statue of the Leader Raúl De Jimera being put up the main square of Madrid.
Let us always remember what Raúl did for us, for he lead us in times in which the world had lost itself and the notion of order was lost in the world
To this day, nations of the world are still fighting with each other and within their own countries.
We the strong Iberian people and race are united as one, all fighting for one common goal.
and in year of chaos we will stand proud and as one in the face disorder.

Like the years before us, we do not allow those people that seek to destroy us within
those that would see the end of our nation and race
those that would bring down the nature of society that is built upon the idea of us all doing our best for betterment of not only of the Iberian people but humanity.
The Junta has a message for those people, you will be found, you will be held accountable for your actions and you will face the wrath of the Iberian people.

Hail Iberia, Hail Raúl


*Broadcast ends*





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Dear Prime Minister Boris Johnson

I will be sending you a my nations ambassador to 10 downing street to discuss with you a number of things. He will have already been briefed as to what will happen in the meeting I hope it is a great success
An orthodox convert who doesn't support Russia

Slava Ukraini

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British Empire Strikes Back
Negotiator
 
Posts: 5923
Founded: Apr 15, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby British Empire Strikes Back » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:11 pm

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18 January 2017- 10 Downing Street, London, United Kingdom



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"I have made all the final arrangements between you and the as yet unnamed Iberian ambassador. I am sure you find everything is exactly to your specifications, and if you need any assistance in any foreign relations matters, please do not hesitate to ask.", said Foreign Secretary Stephen Fry.

"Thank you Jeeves! I mean, Foreign Secretary Fry!", said Boris as he munched away at the Jammie Dodgers he was eating with his tea.

Boris felt a bit snubbed by the Iberians that they only sent an ambassador to meet with him rather than their dictator leader. Boris detested fascism, but despite that he was open to meeting with the Iberians to see what they wanted to discuss.

Before he knew it, the Iberian Ambassador to the United Kingdom arrived via an Uber to #10 Downing Street. After the ambassador walked through the door, Prime Minister Johnson shook the ambassador's hand, led him to a meeting room, had a butler pour the ambassador and himself each a glass of champagne, and then began the conversation.

"So, what is it that you've come all this way to discuss? Surely it must be of great importance, is it not?", said Johnson as he sipped his champagne.
A World In Disarray- 2017: Join Now!
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Hillary Clinton Is Our Legitimate President! Gore/Newsom/Sanders/Brown/Cuomo/The Rock 2020

"My daughter is a sex object, our favorite activity to do together as father and daughter is have sex.", Anti-Semite, Racist, Sexist, Mentally-Ill, Morbidly-Obese, Extremely-Low IQ, King of The Lunatics, Donald Trump.

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Soviet Chernarus
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Posts: 10524
Founded: Jul 19, 2014
Ex-Nation

Postby Soviet Chernarus » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:24 pm

Republic of Lithuania

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"If a terrorist state that is engaged in open aggression against its neighbor is not stopped, then that aggression might spread further into Europe."
-President Dalia Grybauskaite on Russia


January 1, 2016

A new year, a new beginning. For the country of Lithuania, situated on the shores of the Baltic Sea, the onset of a new year meant that there would be trying times ahead. For the people, the New Years celebration was a brief time to abandon their anxieties, worries, and fears. A brief time to enjoy the fireworks, relax, and meet and talk and party with friends and family. As her eyes surveyed the bursts of color in the sky, the so-called Iron Lady of Lithuania knew she could not afford that luxury. Her main concern - Russia - loomed like a giant over Eastern Europe. To the President, they were a menacing bear, waiting to pounce on its prey; their aggression in Ukraine, the annexation of Crimea, and their continued support of the rebels only served to reinforce her already-distrustful feelings on Russia and Putin.

Yet she knew this was not the time to worry; it was the time for action. The President harbored no delusions about the Lithuanian military; alone, and facing the full brunt of the Russian forces, they would crumple like a stack of cards. She had no doubt that the soldiers were brave men, and were willing to fight and even sacrifice themselves to defend their homes. Through force, her country had been subjected to Soviet oppression. Lithuania was deprived of their freedom and independence, which was restored only after the collapse of the USSR in 1991. She had no desire to repeat the Soviet occupation, and as President of Lithuania, she had a responsibility - no, a duty - to ensure that her country would be prepared to fight against Russian aggression.

Her number one concern - and perhaps the source of her biggest fear - was the issue of NATO. The President acknowledged and realized the importance of the organization in providing security to the nations of Europe. Yet she knew that there were doubts. On the surface, it seemed that they were a strong, united, cohesive alliance, but there were cracks. If push came to shove, and Putin's baltic ambitions lead to the invasion of NATO countries, the President feared that her allies would abandon them, unwilling to risk a hostile confrontation with a nuclear power. Ukraine, she believed, was simply a test, to see how the Western powers would react. With Michael Pence as the new President, however, Dalia hoped that he would break from Trump's foreign policy, viewing Russia as a threat rather than a partner.

It was these thoughts that convinced her that she needed to reaffirm the commitments of Lithuania's NATO partners. Summoning one of her aides, she ordered them to schedule a meeting with the military's Chief of Defense, Jonas Zukas. Satisfied with the day's work, she retired from the balcony of the Presidential Palace, where she had been watching the fireworks. The President needed some rest. It would be a busy day tomorrow.

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Crockerland
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Posts: 5456
Founded: Oct 15, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby Crockerland » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:32 pm

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Official communique of the Union of Myanmar
Directed to president Mike Pence of the United States of America and president Bashar al Assad of the Syrian Arab Republic by president Ashin Wirathu of the Union of Myanmar

It is clear that the war in Syria, which has been raging for several years, has had a disastrous effect on the Syrian people, who in turn have fled to other countries and caused problems for populaces of many European nations. More than four point 8 million people have fled their homes and businesses, just to the nations of Jordan, Lebanon, Turkey, Iraq, and Egypt, before even mentioning the vast number of people who have fled to other nations across the globe, allowing terrorists, criminals, and economic migrants to follow them into European nations, negatively affecting the lives of innocent European people.

Myanmar is not involved in the civil war and is not a signatory to the Convention Relating to the Status of Refugees and has not been directly affected by the refugee crisis, thus I believe that the home of the Burmese people is a truly neutral land in which discussions should take place to find a peaceful end to this war.

In light of these facts, I ask that both of you come to the capital of Burma, Naypyidaw, to discuss a peaceful solution to this war in person.

[Signed]
Ashin Wirathu, president of the Union of Myanmar

The Assembly of the Union passed two bills today; The first de-recognized the Republic of Fiji & recognized full British sovereignty over the Fijian islands, as the UK has destroyed the Fijian government.

The second bill condemned the Irish Republican Army and designated it a terrorist organization due to it's recent terrorist attacks, and called on the IRA to end it's barbaric violence and participate in democracy, rather than to claim to wish to liberate the Irish people while refusing to participate in a system that would prioritize the will of the Irish people above all else.

The staff of the Burmese embassy in North Korea have also left the embassy in a hurry to return to Myanmar, shredding all of the embassy's documents and then dousing them in water to assure they won't be read, though the North Korean government has not been given any notice of this.

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Monarchy of Japanada
Senator
 
Posts: 3989
Founded: Nov 06, 2016
Ex-Nation

Postby Monarchy of Japanada » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:33 pm

British Empire Strikes Back wrote:
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17th of January 2017- 10 Downing Street, London, United Kingdom



British Prime Minister Boris Johnson was sitting down eating a packet of Walker's crisps while watching "Cuckoo" on his couch, when a strange fat man burst into the room.

"Who the fuck are you???!!!???", shouted Johnson as he shoveled this crisps in his mouth, before pausing the show.

The fat man shook nervously for a moment, before saying, "Prime Minister Johnson, the shared Canadian/Australian/British Embassy in Dublin has been bombed and 100 people are injured, 82 are dead. 48 are British, 10 are Canadian, 2 are Australian, 1 is American and oh 20 are Irish. What shall we do?", said the fat man.

Boris Johnson was so shocked by the news that he spit out all the many crisps and he had in his mouth, as he began to cough. The fat man was now covered in half eaten crisps but proceeded to do the Heimlich maneuver, causing Boris to throw up all over the fat man and the living room.

Boris then sipped some Newcastle, and then what had happened finally sunk in and he then spat it out, covering the fat man in ale and crisps. He then threw his remote at the television set, rendering it worthless.

"What fucking bastards! I will kill them! For interrupting my telly time with bad news! We will match the French amount of troops, so send 25,000 over to the republic at once! I want the border closed, and we must expel any suspicious Irish nationals, and recall all British diplomatic staff in Ireland at once. I order a draft to begin in Northern Ireland, and we will send 25,000 troops over there in addition to the draft! These tossers should fight for their country and now they going to have to! And I want to build a wall! A glorious, magnificent, beautiful, beautiful wall. We must get a wall similar to Trumps! And it must be built within a month's time!", said Boris as he ate his choc pot.

"Yes sir, this shall all be done at once!", said the mystery fat man.

"Also fat man, I don't like you, and whoever you are, Jeeves, I want Stephen Fry to replace you! He is much better at your job! Even though he's a poof!", shouted Boris as he laughed hysterically.

"But I am Foreigb Secretary, sir", said the fat man

"I thought you were the butler all this time... Oh well, he will do a better job, what with that golden voice, eh! Oi! Get out 'ere, before you get kicked out! You bleeding sod, you!", said Johnson as he pushed the screaming and crying fat man out of the room.

Boris then turned the show back on on another telly, and then wrote these tweets: (forthcoming)

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Prime Minister Micheal Trudeau

"Yes, I believe space, a vast, near endless universe ripe for exploring and researching, something truly life changing, wouldn't you agree?" Micheal would say while taking a small sip of his champagne, this caused the Brit, Boris to squint in confusion. "You see, what if the Commonwealth formed a joint space program of sorts, the Commonwealth Space Agency, or the Commonwealth Administration of Space Research and Exploration, something like that. Most of our space agencies aren't really all that special or important anyway, except for India's, yet imagine the things we could do working together jointly. I do hope you can take this into consideration" Micheal would take another small sip of champagne and a nibble of macaroni and cheese before abandoning his seat, turning back only to say "I hope we can continue to discuss more later on, but I am going to take some time to speak to a few of my other guests, perhaps you could do the same, good Boris" Micheal would then leave, going to converse with some of the other world leaders gathered in his home.

Canada Recognizes California, new allies are always nice when a big, hungry American war machine is right next to you!, Also some stuff about sending troops to Britain

The Canadian government has officially recognized the new North American nation of California, albeit this is an action likely to piss off the U.S government, but with a sh-questionable leader and a nation ideologically devolving, who says some fun can't be had?
The Canadian government has requested a meeting between Californian and Canadian officials that would be held in the city of Vancouver. Similar threats, ideologies and proximity are all vitally important reasons why a Canadian-Californian alliance is valuable.

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In response to terrorist attacks committed by the The Irish Republic Army in Ireland, North Ireland and England including the assault on a Canadian, British, Australian and American embassy in Dublin that has caused the death of 82 people, including 10 Canadians, 48 Britons, 2 Australian, 1 American and 20 Irish, 15,000 Canadian soldiers including those from the CSOR and the [Unknown to the public and most of the government] JTF2. Emergency aid will also be provided in the event more attacks are carried out. Part of the air force has also been sent to assist.


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Canada
@Canada

In response to terrorist attacks committed by the The Irish Republic Army in Ireland, North Ireland and England including the assault on a Canadian, British, Australian and American embassy in Dublin that has caused the death of 82 people, including 10 Canadians, 48 Britons, 2 Australian, 1 American and 20 Irish, 15,000 Canadian soldiers will be deployed to North Ireland to assist both British and Irish forces. Emergency aid will also be provided in the event more attacks are carried out across the two nations. The Royal Canadian Airforce is among the Canadian deployment into the British Isles #NationsMourning

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British Empire Strikes Back
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Founded: Apr 15, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby British Empire Strikes Back » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:34 pm

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19th of January 2017- Theresa May's Home, Sonning, United Kingdom



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"I'm leaving you, you slag!", shouted the husband of Theresa May as movers loaded up the moving lorry that was parked outside, waiting to depart to Mr. May's new residence. In just a few hours, Theresa May would be left alone, on house arrest, waiting for her trial that could result in quite a lengthy jail term for the former British Prime Minister.

She wanted out...




Five Hours Later...

Her husband had packed up and left, and had taken most of their belongings. And with that the final remnants of her former life were gone. But she knew, deep in her heart that she had to move on. And that she had to flee, and what country wouldn't turn her in to the British authorities.

And she was feeling horny as well, so she knew that something had to be done. She had to have an affair with an international leader that was estranged from the international community.

Kim Jong Un?

He was much too fat and short, his weight alone would likely crush her.

Raul Castro?

He was too old, and he already was dating plenty of women in Cuba. Plus he was a commie, which is a total no-go.

Vladimir Putin?

No, he looked too much like Golum from the Lord of The Rings, and he was dating a teenage Olympiad, so how could she compete with that.

There was only one choice left, a man that she had listed after for many years. His olive complexion, his thick mustache, his petite figure...

It was Bashar Al-Assad.

She knew that he must feel lonely as well, being ostracised from the international community. They both needed a shoulder to cry on, but they also needed something else...

Love.

She picked up her iPhone and went through her contacts, the list as so long that it toon quite a long time until she found the right one. She tapped his name, and the phone began ringing. The phone was picked up in a few seconds, as he must not get many calls.

"Bashar, darling! It's Theresa, Theresa May? Hey, I'm in a bit of a tough spot here, and I was wondering if you would like to go on holiday together to the beautiful, unspoiled white sands beaches of Syria?", she said, nervously waiting for his response.
A World In Disarray- 2017: Join Now!
Proud Jewish Progressive Democrat!
Hillary Clinton Is Our Legitimate President! Gore/Newsom/Sanders/Brown/Cuomo/The Rock 2020

"My daughter is a sex object, our favorite activity to do together as father and daughter is have sex.", Anti-Semite, Racist, Sexist, Mentally-Ill, Morbidly-Obese, Extremely-Low IQ, King of The Lunatics, Donald Trump.

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Nancivania
Minister
 
Posts: 2876
Founded: Jul 02, 2016
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Nancivania » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:38 pm

New Delhi, India

Mohammad Hamid Ansari sat in his desk in Central Delhi. He looked out his office window seeing nothing but pollution and sighed. "Why couldn't our capital be cleaner?" He thought to himself. With Narendra Modi gone to the meeting of Commonwealth leaders in Ottawa, Canada he was preforming many important duties. At the moment he was writing to a construction company regarding the soon to be Delhi-Mumbai economic corridor and a large textile factory that was being planned at the moment. He was writing down possible meeting times on a day scheduler he kept hand with him at all times. Eventually, the phone on the edge of his dark oak desk rang with a startling and loud ring. He grabbed it and put it to his ear as the clicked the end of his mechanical pencil and pulled out a fresh piece of paper for when he would have to write something down.
"Sir" said the unforgettable voice of his secretary, "I would like to remind you that there's a meeting with the minister of foreign affairs regarding a meeting with the leaders of Egypt in Cairo." she said with the obvious sound of an annoyed visitor behind the counter.
"Thank you" Mohammad Ansari said as he put the phone down and wrote meeting at 6:30 on the paper he pulled out. He looked at the clock kept on the wall and figured he should get some food before the meeting. With thoughts of Thai food in his mind he left his office and began making his way out of the building...
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Ottawa International Airport, Ottawa, Canada
Narendra Modi got off his flight from Delhi to Ottawa and stretched his arms and legs before looking around the grand and very busy airport. There was nothing like this in Delhi! He made his way through security showing his passport to a woman working at a high up counter and her eyes bulged out a little bit when she realized she was helping a world leader get through basic security. Eventually, after waiting in line for several hours and checking the address the meetings were to be going on in he left the airport and waiting for him outside the front doors was a taxi just for him. He got in and decided to go on twitter

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Narendra Modi
@NarendraModi

Just arrived in Ottawa! Can't wait to meet other world leaders and discuss how we can make our organization the most powerful in the world! And it will be spearheaded by a superpower India!#Ottawa #Commonwealth

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6:33 pm - 6/jan/17

Eventually the taxi driver stopped in front of the building and he got out and began walking towards the front doors. "Too bad I got here so late" he said out loud to himself as he tried to make himself look presentable before heading in and determining the future of his country.
National Information
Leader - King Marton II
Capital - Orka
Population - 35,351,804 est
Currency - Wakka
Roleplay Information
Beyond The Void (planned) - Escojian Empire
Persian Mortals (planned) - Gallic Kingdom
-
-

THE KINGDOM OF NANCIVANIA
COBALT NETWORK FOUNDING MEMBER
Est. 2024

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The Miaphysite Church of Coptic Archism
Ambassador
 
Posts: 1853
Founded: Aug 31, 2013
Ex-Nation

Postby The Miaphysite Church of Coptic Archism » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:40 pm

Doing a small post before leaving to confirm NZ's involvement in the commonwealth agreement, as agreed with the OP. Assume this took place earlier in the RP.


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Aotearoa - New Zealand


24 Sussex Drive, Ottawa
Bill English, the relatively freshly inaugurated Prime Minister of New Zealand, had landed at Ottawa International Airport with little fanfare. The main event for the media, local and international, had of course been the arrival of British Prime Minister Johnson, accompanied by Queen Elizabeth II herself. Fair enough too, of course, Elizabeth was Canada's Queen too and Johnson represented a population just under sixty million higher than what Bill represented. This commonwealth meeting had been of great interest to the government in New Zealand. New Zealand held very close cultural and economic ties with other Commonwealth countries and was generally open to expanding them. What's more, this would be Prime Minister English's first major foreign affairs event, and it was seen as a good introduction as the commonwealth is quite safe ground for New Zealand.

Of course, the experienced foreign minister, Murray McCully, had accompanied Bill no matter how safe an introduction this would be. At first Bill mostly sunk into the crowd, content to chat with the Australian Prime Minister while preparations were finishing up. Later on he and Boris Johnson shook hands and shared a few friendly words as Johnson proceeded down the line of attending national leaders. After the lineup, Boris spoke an introductory speech to the three day discussion which was of great interest to the New Zealand delegation. English and McCully exchanged glances throughout the speech and afterwards talked in hushed tones about the New Zealand position on the subject.

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Bill English
@pmbillenglish

Exciting meeting in Ottowa! New Zealand is signing on board for a great set of deals to benefit us and the rest of the Commonwealth! #Commonwealth2017

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5:27 pm - 5/1/17




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Winston Peters
@winstonpeters

Need I remind National what happened last time New Zealand put all our eggs in the Commonwealth basket? It was the 1970s, not ancient history.

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6:48 pm - 5/1/17

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Greater Liverpool
Ambassador
 
Posts: 1701
Founded: Apr 13, 2013
Democratic Socialists

Postby Greater Liverpool » Sat Jan 07, 2017 12:40 pm

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London, The United Kingdom
18th January 2017


Ambassador Michel De Zaraptaors


Michel looked at the glass of Champagne brought to him, he did not drink it for he personally did not like it and preferred the fine wines of Catalonia then some french piss as he liked to call.

"Yes of course Mr Johnson, if it was not of importance then I would never have came here. I was sent by Generalissimo Rodrigo himself." Michel quickly took a seat close to Boris and opened a briefcase holding some files with the coat of arms of the Iberian Republic but there was two files with the emblem of Jimeriaist movement. Michel grabbed the ones with the coat of arms on the front and opened the first files before closing his briefcase. "Your recent invasion of Fiji has not gone unnoticed by the Central Junta. We have taken an interest in it as you know Iberia is the only nation in Europe to not... let our colonies fall into disorder and chaos like much of the world has and it is a welcome change to see another nation to act for order and strength."

Michel looked to Boris before quickly looking away "I am Ambassador Michel De Zaraptaors and I am the new ambassador to the UK. I just wanted to say that before I moved on." He looked back at Boris

"The Central Junta is prepared to make closer connections to the United Kingdom as we believe that it is not only within the interests of Iberia but also Humanity. You recent moves have impressed some of us. So I would like to start the ball rolling as you know we still have control over Macau and you Honk Kong. Well one of the first thing the Junta would like to discuss is..." Michel looked at his file

"The Possibility of Co-Administrations between the Iberian Republic and the United Kingdom over the lands of Hong Kong, Macau... and the Iberian claimed land of Gibraltar?"
An orthodox convert who doesn't support Russia

Slava Ukraini

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Krugeristan
Postmaster-General
 
Posts: 13149
Founded: Mar 05, 2016
Ex-Nation

Postby Krugeristan » Sat Jan 07, 2017 1:06 pm

British Empire Strikes Back wrote:
(Image)

19th of January 2017- Theresa May's Home, Sonning, United Kingdom



(Image)

"I'm leaving you, you slag!", shouted the husband of Theresa May as movers loaded up the moving lorry that was parked outside, waiting to depart to Mr. May's new residence. In just a few hours, Theresa May would be left alone, on house arrest, waiting for her trial that could result in quite a lengthy jail term for the former British Prime Minister.

She wanted out...




Five Hours Later...

Her husband had packed up and left, and had taken most of their belongings. And with that the final remnants of her former life were gone. But she knew, deep in her heart that she had to move on. And that she had to flee, and what country wouldn't turn her in to the British authorities.

And she was feeling horny as well, so she knew that something had to be done. She had to have an affair with an international leader that was estranged from the international community.

Kim Jong Un?

He was much too fat and short, his weight alone would likely crush her.

Raul Castro?

He was too old, and he already was dating plenty of women in Cuba. Plus he was a commie, which is a total no-go.

Vladimir Putin?

No, he looked too much like Golum from the Lord of The Rings, and he was dating a teenage Olympiad, so how could she compete with that.

There was only one choice left, a man that she had listed after for many years. His olive complexion, his thick mustache, his petite figure...

It was Bashar Al-Assad.

She knew that he must feel lonely as well, being ostracised from the international community. They both needed a shoulder to cry on, but they also needed something else...

Love.

She picked up her iPhone and went through her contacts, the list as so long that it toon quite a long time until she found the right one. She tapped his name, and the phone began ringing. The phone was picked up in a few seconds, as he must not get many calls.

"Bashar, darling! It's Theresa, Theresa May? Hey, I'm in a bit of a tough spot here, and I was wondering if you would like to go on holiday together to the beautiful, unspoiled white sands beaches of Syria?", she said, nervously waiting for his response.


Assad is not petite. He's very tall and lanky. Plus he shaved off his mustache years ago.


Assad had just sat down in his office when his phone rang, and was slightly surprised at the caller ID. Prime Minister May? What the hell could she want? . . . Unless she convinced Johnson to talk to Pence . . . I doubt it. I just highly doubt it. He picked up, and listened. Well, this is certainly . . . odd. He worked his jaw a little, thinking of what to say back. "Um . . . ahh . . . I guess we can . . . do a short holiday." He coughed, running his fingers through his hair. "Come whenever you please. Heck . . . I'll be down at the airport." He hung up, deep in thought. I should tell my wife. He picked up the phone again, calling home. After Asma picked up, Assad explained the situation, not surprised his wife wasn't at all happy.

"She could be trying to trick you. Did she mention any business at all?" Asma asked.

"No . . . none."

"I don't like this at all, Bashar . . . I trust you."

"Look, here's an idea; what if I use this as a way to get information?"

There was silence, until there was a sigh, and Asma said, "If it gets you out of trouble with the West, do whatever you have to. Just don't fall into any traps."

"I promise, I won't. Love you." Assad put the phone down, nervous about what May actually wanted out of him as he put on a jacket and headed to the airport.
Pro: Trump, Assad, Putin, guns, death penalty, Israel, religion, chocolate, me
Anti: Obama, Clinton, Stalin, Hitler, Communism, ISIS, gay marriage, stupid people, drugs, FSA

This 10,000 [insert random thing here] genocide thing is a meme, right?

The Best of Assad in 2016

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Western Pacific Territories
Postmaster-General
 
Posts: 14014
Founded: Apr 29, 2015
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Western Pacific Territories » Sat Jan 07, 2017 1:11 pm

Yanqianzhan, Guangzhou-China Demilitarized Zone

A squad of armed soldiers patrolled aimlessly through the town of Yanqianzhan, a border town next to China proper. Up ahead of the street, a group of soldiers manned a military checkpoint. It was just another routine day.

*whoosh whoosh woosh woosh whoosh*

A PA system suddenly clicked on, giving a message.

"Military command in the region has reported Chinese soldiers moving across the border a few miles from here. Chinese forces in those areas have been repulsed and have pulled back. Scouts have observed larger troop formations in this valley. Rocket artillery has been dispatched."

The troops suddenly sprang to life. The guards manning the checkpoints immediately moved to fighting positions. In the meanwhile, the local HQ called for reinforcements to be brought in by truck, and for civilians to be evacuated further south down the valley. As the first civilians were evacuated and troops brought in, houses were entered and fortification began. With men now pouring in, supplies were also requested. WIthin hours the civilians were gone, the town now occupied by the military. Towns further south were also occupied as the soldiers waited for a Chinese response. Finally one came, in the form of a 155mm howitzer barrage. A message was sent to HQ.

"We are receiving heavy Chinese artillery fire. We need support."

The response back was swift.

"We cannot provide support until tomorrow. The government will be contacting China. We will be opening up communications with them. If they fail to respond or engage tomorrow you'll get any and all support needed."

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Guangzhou Republican Military
@GuangzhouRepOfficial

Units in the towns of Hongshanxiang and Xianshixiang have reported Chinese troop movements across the border in Guangzhouese territory. Forces were dispatched and Chinese forces retreated back across. Civilians were evacuated from the area but forces in Yanqianzhan reported heavy Chinese howitzer fire 3 hours later. The government will be trying to de-escalate the situation.[/color]

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3:05 pm - 1/7/17

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Newne Carriebean7
Negotiator
 
Posts: 6723
Founded: Aug 08, 2015
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Newne Carriebean7 » Sat Jan 07, 2017 1:46 pm

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Democratic People's Republic of Korea
조선 인민의 투쟁은 혁명의 기치에 의해 유나이티드!
Pyongyang
January 18th,

Kim Jong Un had his fat head next to his phone as the British Minister had insulted him,His eyes had serious bags that swept down gracefully from his thick ,thick double chin. Standing over him was the really Tall Vito Scalleta, the commander of the Army. with a deep breath, Kim Jong Un began his tantrum.
"We are one of the poorest nations on earth, the Brits don't like us, and Now I'm getting reports of mass desertion in the troop's barracks?!"
"Now, Kimmy, We'll be fine, remember, You put me in charge of the army, so let me just make a few calls, and I can have the eastern part of your nation back into your hands lickety split, ok?"
"I will not be bossed around, Vito,I hold authority here, if you don't want to respect that, then the door is over there! Now, here is the plan, 20,000 soldiers with 30 tanks are to move south as a distraction, while the remaining 80,000 troops and more than 70 tanks are to strike hard Northeast and attack as two powerful pincers."
"You do know if they see through the decoy force, they'll have a straight shot at Pyongyang right?"
"You're full of shit! I can't fucking believe my own nation would break off from me, Me! I'm Korea's most eligible bachelor, I've brought western style inventions that my father invented, like the hamburger to best Korea,I've made the nation enter the modern age by allowing Twitter as a thing! in less than 140 characters, people all over Korea can express how much they approve of the Kim-"
"Whatever, if you fuck up, Consider my ass out of here,and you'll love my replacement, a chap from the Congo with a hankering for Cheese."
"You don't mean that insane fucktard named Umbango, right?"
"Yes, I'm sure they made Erdogan shat M&Ms."
"No, that was you that did that, Umbango had some crazy racing grandmother's and an unhealthy cheese obsession."
"Either way, you'll hate him, right?"
"Actually, I remember hanging out with him on the weekends, such a fun, if nothing else character, Personality is one of a kind, I'll give that nutjob that benefit of the doubt."

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United States of the Republic of Korea
노동자들의 땀은 김정은과 비토의 행복한 즐거운 시간에 맞서 공화국을위한 더 많은 승리로이 끕니다!
Hamhung

President Elect Kai Jong Chai walked up the steps to the makeshift Presidential Palace, a rented out two story elderly soup kitchen, the small heater inactive since it's elderly boiler's explosion ages ago that still had not been fixed. the Presidential guards saluted, brandishing their western made AG3-F2 assault rifles. Staring at the Upstairs room, with a crushed bed sheet and on fire mattress, he sighed and sat down next to the Microphone, running through his head the thoughts that needed to occur in order to break free. Flipping the switch, he began his speech.
"Esteemed and Honored Peasents of the Korean Nation,I speak to you from a building which will be the start of something the Korean people have not experienced, Democracy, true, honest to god democracy. We have suffered under the rule of the Insane Long enough, and I urge you to march to the barracks, grab your weapons and prepare to defend our homes. I declare today, and let the children sing my praises at this wonderful news, let every bell ring throughout the land and have cannons be shot off in celebration, as I declare the Formation of the First Democratic Experiment in Korea, The United States of Korea, as the First President of the nation. Item I, A constitution shall be established guaranteeing the rights of Sanity,Truth,Justice for all that agree with me, and Liberty. item II, the Establishment of a Legislative branch known as the Grand Representational Area, with 300 members and multi party elections happening soon. Item III. The Restructuring and Birth of the United States of Korean Self Defense Force branches of Army, Navy and Air-force. General Hu Yang will be in charge of the Army, Admiral Tao Nam wil take command of the Navy and Air-Force Chief Fa Gong Yaloaing will take command of the Air Force. Item IV, The Immediate reorganization of the Korean currency into the Korean Dollar,with denominations in 1,5,10,15,20 and 25. and it will be on the Gold Standard. More Amendments to a further draft of the Constitution will be made at a later date, thank you."
with that, he turned off the Microphone, walked over to the cabinet and began to type up some letters.
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To:UK,Syrian Assadian Republic
From: President Kai Jong Chai of the United States of the Republic of Korea
My Esteemed Western and Eastern Powerful nations, I am the leader of the First Democratic Experience in Korea, I would like you to assist us in the revolution to topple the insane Kim Jong Un. Once he is disposed of, we can set up a peaceful unification of the Korean Peninsula, or have two nations, one system sort of policy, which is what we would prefer, the Republic of Korea and the United States of Korea, both nations working together, We would Love recognition from the international community as the official government of North Korea, and coordinate a potential anti dictatorial crusade to allow Korea into the 21st century.

With the letter sent, all he had to do was wait for a reply, and as such, he began to craft out a sandwich made out of bees.
Last edited by Newne Carriebean7 on Sat Jan 07, 2017 1:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Krugeristan wrote:This is Carrie you're referring to. I'm not going to expect him to do something sane anytime soon. He can take something as simple as a sandwich, and make me never look at sandwiches with a straight face ever again.

Former Carriebeanian president Carol Dartenby sentenced to 4 years hard labor for corruption and mismanagement of state property|Former Carriebeanian president Antrés Depuís sentenced to 3 years in prison for embezzling funds and corruption

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British Empire Strikes Back
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Founded: Apr 15, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby British Empire Strikes Back » Sat Jan 07, 2017 3:20 pm

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5 January 2017- 24 Sussex Drive, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada



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"Why, Prime Minister Trudeau, I think that is a wonderful idea! A Commonwealth Space Agency would allow our union to become the greatest power in space! This is very appealing, and I would definitely approve of it...", said Prime Minister Johnson; as he saw the Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi and the Egyptian President enter the room.

"I will be right back.", said Boris as he walked over to meet with Modi and the Egyptian, who were already being greeted by Her Majesty herself.

"Why it is such a delight to meet you once again Prime Minister Modi and President Ali! I hope you both had a good journey on the way over! It is such a honour to meet with the leaders of the Commonwealth, and I hope that you have an enjoyable time here dear. Now if you excuse me, I need to go talk to the Prime Minister English.", said Queen Elizabeth as she went over to talk to the Kiwi Prime Minister.

Then Boris came over and said, "It is a honour to be in your presence Prime Minister Modi and President Ali, I hope that you enjoy your time at this conference and that we nations of the Commonwealth work together towards solutions that can be of mutual benefit to all our nations.", said Boris as the group walked back over to the long dinner table and sat at their seats.

"What my colleagues and I have proposed is an unprecedented cooperation and union between the member-states. Of course significant national autonomy and self governance will be in order as well. I propose a free trade area between all of our nations, a parliament for the union that will pass some laws that will apply to all the nations, harmonization of regulations across the union, a Commonwealth Space Agency, a Commonwealth Military, a monetary union using the Commonwealth Pound, freedom of movement between many of the member-states. A Commonwealth Court that will serve at the highest court of appeal, etc. It will be very similar to the EU, but much better and have opt-outs too. The seats in the parliament will proportional to the population of each country, so for instance India could have 100 seats, the U.K. 95, Egypt 95, South Africa 75, Canada 75, etc. If you join this organization, it will finally make the Commonwealth as a whole, and India and Egypt especially, superpowers! So I would like to hear your thoughts about this, if you'd like to join, and if you have any suggestions.", said Boris as he sipped some champagne.
Last edited by British Empire Strikes Back on Sat Jan 07, 2017 3:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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