Mana Academy (OOC) (Semi-Open, Fantasy/Slice of Life)

[Luminesa]

There is no Mary Sue greater than this.

(Image)

Fear the Wicked God...

Oh no.

[Chrome Legion]

I can't really think of any characters from fiction that my characters are. Catherine is a variation of a character I've used 2x before on this site. Annice is... kind of a space marine from 40k. Hailey's err, a vocaloid. Tsukuyomi is vaguely inspired by a music video.

[Prusselanden]

Well, he's mostly a Mary Sue, because you've been using him to forward the plot, so for now I'd just leave it alone. Most of the Mary Sue things he does is to move along the plot or character interaction, so it's kind of necessary.

Well...I will admit I have been using Rabbit for a lot...I have a tendency to panick when my RPs slow down. Sorry. XD

But like, is the character bad? I'm worried now, I've never been told a character is a Mary Sue, and I wanna make them better.

Well...you could have Rabbit's flaws be a real challenge for him. His "too nice" flaw is very evident, and makes a lot of trouble for him, which is good. However, it appears to only hinder him in dangerous situations and not on a daily life basis. You could give him another flaw that he struggles with constantly, like laziness or scatter-brainness which affects him day-to-day routine.

[Sky-TheLandOfNekos]

There is no Mary Sue greater than this.

(Image)

Fear the Wicked God...

Oh no.

It's a card. xD

[Luminesa]

Oh no.

It's a card. xD

Oh I know. I recognized it for that reason.

Judgement Dragon is the biggest Sue. That's why I have three of him. XD

[Prusselanden]

Interesting...you know, Ignis is partly based off of Sun Wukong himself and Hagrid. And maybe a generic Disney Princess.

[Saleon]

(Image)

It's a card. xD

Oh I know. I recognized it for that reason.

Judgement Dragon is the biggest Sue. That's why I have three of him. XD

I liked wicked eraser as well.

[Luminesa]

Interesting...you know, Ignis is partly based off of Sun Wukong himself and Hagrid. And maybe a generic Disney Princess.

Which one?

[Charlia]

Interesting...you know, Ignis is partly based off of Sun Wukong himself and Hagrid. And maybe a generic Disney Princess.

Which one?

A generic one.

You know. Generic. No specified princess, just generic.

[Saldinado]

Hm. I'm still thinking whether or not if Shaun is a Gary Stu.

I've been taking multiple test, and they seem to say that he's not (except for that long-ass one, Jesus), however I feel like there's still something...cliche and boring about him.

[Prusselanden]

Interesting...you know, Ignis is partly based off of Sun Wukong himself and Hagrid. And maybe a generic Disney Princess.

Which one?

Like a generic one cause they can talk to and befriend animals.
In fact she got 5 points on the test because of her close relationship with them.

[Prusselanden]

Hm. I'm still thinking whether or not if Shaun is a Gary Stu.

I've been taking multiple test, and they seem to say that he's not (except for that long-ass one, Jesus), however I feel like there's still something...cliche and boring about him.

Make him like ur old OC Doctor Jones!

[Luminesa]

Hm. I'm still thinking whether or not if Shaun is a Gary Stu.

I've been taking multiple test, and they seem to say that he's not (except for that long-ass one, Jesus), however I feel like there's still something...cliche and boring about him.

If he's cliche and boring he's not a Stu. Unless he's Bella from Twilight, and people love him for no reason. Then he's a True Stu.

I think Shaun is interesting. He speaks a bit formally for a teenager, but other than that he has no glaring faults. He's kinda like what Sol would be if he was more confident in himself. Plus he has enough backstory to balance him out. So I think he's fine. But I dunno. I'm no final authority on these things.

[Prusselanden]

Hm. I'm still thinking whether or not if Shaun is a Gary Stu.

I've been taking multiple test, and they seem to say that he's not (except for that long-ass one, Jesus), however I feel like there's still something...cliche and boring about him.

If he's cliche and boring he's not a Stu. Unless he's Bella from Twilight, and people love him for no reason. Then he's a True Stu.

I think Shaun is interesting. He speaks a bit formally for a teenager, but other than that he has no glaring faults. He's kinda like what Sol would be if he was more confident in himself. Plus he has enough backstory to balance him out. So I think he's fine. But I dunno. I'm no final authority on these things.

A few quirks for him would be good, though.

[Chrome Legion]

If he's cliche and boring he's not a Stu. Unless he's Bella from Twilight, and people love him for no reason. Then he's a True Stu.

I think Shaun is interesting. He speaks a bit formally for a teenager, but other than that he has no glaring faults. He's kinda like what Sol would be if he was more confident in himself. Plus he has enough backstory to balance him out. So I think he's fine. But I dunno. I'm no final authority on these things.

A few quirks for him would be good, though.

Quirks do not a good character make. I would say that you just need to explore the character more. Set up his motivations, you've done a good job of showing us inside his head, but we really haven't seen much of what makes him, him.

[Prusselanden]

A few quirks for him would be good, though.

Quirks do not a good character make. I would say that you just need to explore the character more. Set up his motivations, you've done a good job of showing us inside his head, but we really haven't seen much of what makes him, him.

True, he needs to be a bit more unique.

[Luminesa]

A few quirks for him would be good, though.

Quirks do not a good character make. I would say that you just need to explore the character more. Set up his motivations, you've done a good job of showing us inside his head, but we really haven't seen much of what makes him, him.

^This.

So what about Sol? How much Sue would you say he is?

[Charlia]

Hm. I'm still thinking whether or not if Shaun is a Gary Stu.

I've been taking multiple test, and they seem to say that he's not (except for that long-ass one, Jesus), however I feel like there's still something...cliche and boring about him.

If he's cliche and boring he's not a Stu. Unless he's Bella from Twilight, and people love him for no reason. Then he's a True Stu.

I think Shaun is interesting. He speaks a bit formally for a teenager, but other than that he has no glaring faults. He's kinda like what Sol would be if he was more confident in himself. Plus he has enough backstory to balance him out. So I think he's fine. But I dunno. I'm no final authority on these things.

'Is there a wish that you would trade your life for?'

'Yes.'

'What is it?'

'Well. I could wish away entropy, because screw thermodynamics. But I decided not to. I decided on a wish that has no possible way of backfiring. I decided on a wish that will ensure no one will ever feel despair again!'

'...what's the wish?'

'I wish that Twilight never existed!!!'

'That wish! It violates the laws of karmic destiny! Are you trying to become a god?'

'I don't care what I become. I just want to erase that disease from the universe! Now, grant my wish!'

*and Charli became the concept of hope*

[Prusselanden]

Quirks do not a good character make. I would say that you just need to explore the character more. Set up his motivations, you've done a good job of showing us inside his head, but we really haven't seen much of what makes him, him.

^This.

So what about Sol? How much Sue would you say he is?

He's pretty much a basic cinnamon roll character and only a bit of a Mary Sue. And if uselessness and timidity are his flaws, he never is reprimanded for it so that is one Mary Sue trait.He needs a bit more unique features to spice the character up. What about his hobbies? Favorite books and movies? Favorite music? Goals in life?

[Prusselanden]

If he's cliche and boring he's not a Stu. Unless he's Bella from Twilight, and people love him for no reason. Then he's a True Stu.

I think Shaun is interesting. He speaks a bit formally for a teenager, but other than that he has no glaring faults. He's kinda like what Sol would be if he was more confident in himself. Plus he has enough backstory to balance him out. So I think he's fine. But I dunno. I'm no final authority on these things.

'Is there a wish that you would trade your life for?'

'Yes.'

'What is it?'

'Well. I could wish away entropy, because screw thermodynamics. But I decided not to. I decided on a wish that has no possible way of backfiring. I decided on a wish that will ensure no one will ever feel despair again!'

'...what's the wish?'

'I wish that Twilight never existed!!!'

'That wish! It violates the laws of karmic destiny! Are you trying to become a god?'

'I don't care what I become. I just want to erase that disease from the universe! Now, grant my wish!'

*and Charli became the concept of hope*

Hooray! Thank you Charlie!
I took it for Cheese as well. He's a bit underdeveloped to be a Sue.

[Chrome Legion]

Quirks do not a good character make. I would say that you just need to explore the character more. Set up his motivations, you've done a good job of showing us inside his head, but we really haven't seen much of what makes him, him.

^This.

So what about Sol? How much Sue would you say he is?

If you played him the way do now, but never had him get hurt, he would be up there. As it is, he's not even really close. Or if you insisted that everyone else find him cute and endearing, he would be super Mary Sue.

[Kingdom of Irhk]

Made it for Henry. 30 and something.

Not that bad at all, although I disagreed with some assumptions.

[Luminesa]

^This.

So what about Sol? How much Sue would you say he is?

If you played him the way do now, but never had him get hurt, he would be up there. As it is, he's not even really close. Or if you insisted that everyone else find him cute and endearing, he would be super Mary Sue.

Ah. Okay. That's good.

I worry that a lot of my RP characters are Sues.

[Chrome Legion]

Made it for Henry. 30 and something.

Not that bad at all, although I disagreed with some assumptions.

He got nailed by the nobility part right?

[Saldinado]

A few quirks for him would be good, though.

Quirks do not a good character make. I would say that you just need to explore the character more. Set up his motivations, you've done a good job of showing us inside his head, but we really haven't seen much of what makes him, him.

Oh yes definitely. I'm currently looking for more ways, interests and hobbies for him that might seem different and more of a developmental (ing) figure.

Also, what is the current time that this is taking place? Is this the 21st century?